Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app

Continue in app Continue in browser

30 People Are Sharing Seemingly Innocent Questions That Broke Their Heart A Little

ADVERTISEMENT

We all know that words can heal, just as they can hurt. The same goes with asking questions. Sometimes even the most innocent ones, given the particular circumstances, like a simple “who are you?” and “why wouldn’t you stand up straight for a photo?” can hit us in the bones.

So when Redditor Sneha_magic asked people “What innocent question that someone asked you crushed you a little?” on the AskReddit community, it resonated with many people. And they shared their own emotional experiences when a single question made them very emotional, and it’s one hell of a read. It turns out, we should never take any question for granted, no matter how innocent and well-intentioned it may feel to us.

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

I went to get a haircut for my Fiance's funeral. It was Friday. He had died on Tuesday. My stylist, all bubbly, said, 'It's been awhile!! The last time I saw you, you were just about to move in with your boyfriend! How's it going?' The words stuck and I kind of rasped it out.

Honestly though, her reaction was so wonderful. She was behind me, and just put her hands firmly on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes in the mirror. No shock, no stupid platitudes, just silent, genuine empathy. The rest of the haircut was pretty quiet, but she did everything so... like, lovingly, and didn't make a big deal out of it when I cried a little.

RaptureReject , cottonbro Report

Final score:

247points

Dan 2 years ago

Sorry for your loss

84points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#2

A waiter asked me if my wife was pregnant once. She was just bloated from chemo side effects. Crushed me, so glad she didn't hear. She couldn't have had kids and she passed 2 years back.

Edit: I just wanted to say thanks to those who commented on this, it wasn't expected. We went to the place a lot so as a young couple he had seen over the years it was probably a reasonable thing to assume.

Also I'm doing ok, we knew she was terminal for most of our relationship, we probably did more in those few short years than we would have normally. It hurts a lot still but I know I have her everything I possibly could in that time. Just remember to live life like each day could be your last people, mend that broken friendship, ask out that girl, follow your dream. XXX.

TheMrJacobi , Andrea Piacquadio Report

Final score:

235points

Louise N 2 years ago

no truer words ever spoken.. RIP to your lovely wife

75points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#3

I teach 1st grade and was talking about how I've been married for 5 years. One student asked, 'How could you not have a baby by now?' Not wanting to explain multiple miscarriages and IVF to a classroom of 6 year olds I said, 'Being around all of you makes my heart so full that I don't think I have room in my heart for a baby!!' They all smiled. I smiled too. I've learned from my experience to never ask couples when/if they want to have a family.

Asquirrelgirl , Ivan Aleksic Report

Final score:

230points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

Lovely reply even though it broke your heart.

103points

View more comments

Previously, Bored Panda reached out to Lynn How, the author of “,” about the psychology behind asking and receiving questions like that. Lynn specializes in supporting parents, teachers, and children navigating through mental health issues and prevention. According to Lynn, it is always a good idea to think carefully before asking a question. “There are so many variables to consider, such as, is my question too personal? Do I know the person well enough to ask this question? Should I ask this question in private rather than in front of others? Do I really need to know the answer?”

ADVERTISEMENT

#4

When I was 13 my mom got a divorce from a man who I can only refer to as a “step monster”

I worked all summer to save up money since we didn’t have a lot and I was worried we wouldn’t have enough to pay the bills.

I ended up having a few dollars left over and wanted to buy my mom a gift and she mentioned she needed a new watch for her birthday.

I went to the jeweler and got a $100 gold Citizen Evo Drive watch. It was functional and it looked really nice.

When I gave it to her, her first response was “thanks honey, did it come in silver?”

I was crushed.

Insult to injury: she started dating a guy around the same time and he bought her a crappy silver watch. She ended up wearing his over mine

18 years later and it still hurts when I think about it.

TonkaButt , Mitchel Lensink Report

Final score:

207points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

Your unconditional love and all the heart felt beautiful gifts couldn’t buy her a soul because she was empty in the first place.

127points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#5

Just happened recently actually. A few years ago I had a pretty awesome life, I was married. My husband and I were trying to have kids and when I needed a car we just got me an SUV in anticipation for needing it for kids (he had two and we planned to have 2-3)

Well things didn’t work out and he ended up dying from drinking himself to death in January and between that and 2 miscarriages, an ectopic and an IVF cycle that failed I’m slowly coming to the realization that I’ll never be a mother. It’s painful to say the least.

The kid I nanny for was sitting in my car and we were discussing his day when he says 'nanny why do you have such a big car when it’s only you?' I wanted to cry right there on the spot, it just really stung. But instead I told him it was because I knew I would be watching him and I needed a car big enough for him which seemed to placate him and he then started discussing Batman with me.

SuperGurlToTheRescue , Mike Report

Final score:

169points

Aski Markup 2 years ago

💔

56points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#6

My mom accidentally called me after about 10 years of not talking. I answered all ready for a serious conversation. When I answered, she was like 'wait, who's this?' I say 'hey mom it's me.' Her reply is what hurt.

Who? Why are you calling me mom?

She was so drunk she didn't recognize her own daughter's name. F**k'aye.

fragglerawks , Jonas Leupe Report

Final score:

168points

Elliot Fowler 2 years ago

Heart breaking but maybe since the mom called while drunk, in her subconscious mind she might still want to mend the relationship with her daughter

36points

View More Replies...

View more comments

Moreover, Lynn argues, some questions can easily be taken to be offensive or out of context, even if no offense was meant. “Sometimes well-meaning people can ask something and be surprised by the blunt response! Sometimes we answer the question politely but are secretly dying inside due to sadness or embarrassment.”

#7

My son undergoing chemo and radiation treatment for a bone marrow transplant. People, meaning well of course, would always ask 'how's your son doing?' I'd always have to fake a smile and give some shallow hopeful answer 'he's fine. He's a fighter' but deep inside the question crushed me every time. No, he was suffering. Teetered on the brink of Life and death. He was not 'fine' and Everytime I heard that question I was reminded of it and had to swallow the pain. My son has since recovered, but it was a very tough time.

GameQb11 , Jon Tyson Report

Final score:

163points

Plenty Pineapples 2 years ago (edited)

A genuine question- what should people ask? What question would be helpful? I know it would obviously not be the same for everyone... Edit- thank you so much for the responses!

97points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#8

“Since when do you have a stutter?” -my mom

When I get extremely anxious I stutter a lot. My dad had been incredibly hard on me that day and I was holding back tears. It hurt me that my mom had never noticed it before and she seemed annoyed by it rather than concerned.

yugayaoyama , Ricardo Esquivel Report

Final score:

156points

Rage of Aquarius 2 years ago

Entirely relatable. I'm sorry for their ineptitudes.

41points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#9

I grew up lower middle class and my parents had been severely injured by a drunk driver at the end of my 8th grade year and were disabled and no longer able to work. We basically had no money for school clothes but my mother tried to get me a few cool shirts.

I wasn’t a popular kid and most people didn’t really know much about me. In my freshman year of high school, one of the popular girls in my class asked, “don’t you have more than 3 shirts? I only ever see you in the same 3 shirts.”

High school in the 80’s in the United States sucked.

liablemtl , Anna Nekrashevich Report

Final score:

144points

Mohammad Ammar 2 years ago (edited)

This is why school uniform exists. Saves kids from stuff like this, and saves parents time and money.

67points

Burs 2 years ago

Not true. I wore an uniform most of school. The kids still bully each other for many reasons, one of them being the clothes. Because you still have jackets, backpacks, shoes, socks... Bullies always find a reason to hurt others

42points

Load More Replies...

MiniMaus 2 years ago

She must have had nothing better to do. She knew you had exactly 3 shirts? OMG

7points

Yayaboobo 2 years ago

Me too. I'm Black and my community was really bad with this. I hung out mostly with my white friends and they could care less how I dressed. Sorry y'all it's my truth and I'm gonna speak it.

2points

onivdsrapowijap 2 years ago

By the way, it's "I couldn't care less", not "could care less." Saying you could care less indicates that you at least somewhat care about it, while saying you couldn't care less means you can't care less about it because you already don't care about it at all.

0points

Load More Replies...

Julie Chamberlin 2 years ago

I was so excited when I was 26 and finally got the cool sneakers from high school. 🤣

2points

Trevor Nicholson 2 years ago

One time in high school, I don't remember the whole context, but my teacher said something derogatory about people buying their clothes at Marks Work Warehouse. Guess where I got my clothes. But I wasn't ashamed. I shamed him when I said I did.

2points

KT 2 years ago

dude highschool everywhere sucks

1point

Stacey Smith 2 years ago

"Yes, it's called a washing machine. Can your parents not afford one?"

0points

Lamalo 2 years ago

Yes. Yes it did 😝

0points

GramDB 2 years ago

🙏🙏

0points

Marty Mcfly 2 years ago

Why is it in films in America theres always a bully in schools?

0points

Milady Blue 2 years ago

"If you're so concerned about my wardrobe, then contribute to it or shut the hell up." I hated high school in the 80s as well.

0points

Grumble O'Pug 2 years ago

It's the era of people being brainwashed into brand culture. Awful. I went to prep school with a bunch of rich kids and man, my roommate was the daughter of a french viscount. She just oozed style. My clothes were like home sewn, sears, and a few "mall boutique" stores b/c my dad was just getting a new job in Saudi. She never said a word, though.

0points

Id row 2 years ago

I graduated HS in '89. I'm forever thankful I went to school then and not now. There was still common sense and no internet/social media to bully each other with.

0points

Lorena Hamilton 2 years ago

Actually, the uniforms cost as much as a new school wardrobe.

0points

Emma Starr 2 years ago

Yeah, the worst for me was when a girl at school recognized a shirt I was wearing as one they'd given to charity...

0points

iBlank 2 years ago

my family was pretty poor growing up, and my outfits were all thrift store and budget bin clothes. Kids in school called me "T595" because it was the name on a pair of non-brand shoes I was wearing, with fake air pockets. Sucked at the time, but it's funny to think back on it.

0points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

Moreover, there are many questions that are better left untouched. “There are a myriad of untouchable subjects that I've gleaned from various life experiences. I am certainly much better at question filtering than I was in my 20s. For example, having gone through fertility treatment, I would never ask someone why they were not pregnant yet because I know firsthand how upsetting it is.”

Other taboo subjects include weight, relationships, salary, and age. “Of course, when it's your best friend, you can ask more deep and meaningful questions in comparison to someone you have just met,” Lynn concluded.

#10

I got asked why I wouldn't stand up straight for a photo. I have kyphosis and am standing up as straight as I can.

foxturtle123 , Tom Pottiger Report

Final score:

139points

Jing Yi Xu 2 years ago

I hope you told that person, I'm sorry to hear that

34points

View more comments

#11

Mom asked me, 'Who are you?' when I visited her recently. She has dementia.

socrates_scrotum , Eduardo Barrios Report

Final score:

139points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

I’m sure she appreciates the “stranger’s” visits though.

59points

View more comments

#12

Someone jokingly asked me if I was high because my eyes were red. I had just been diagnosed with an eye disease and told I would go blind before 50. My eyes were red from my medicated eye drops and partially from crying. I was only sixteen and having a hard time coming to terms with it.

[deleted] , Vanessa Bumbeers Report

Final score:

137points

Samantha Power 2 years ago

Sorry to read this, always wonder why people can be so incredibly insensitive.

39points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#13

"Why did you did you teach yourself how to shave"

My boss asked me when I missed a few spots when I was in work. We got into the topic of shaving properly. My father died when I was 12 of a heart attack. He wasn't really around enough or cared enough to be in my life. From when he left my mother when I was 5, she raised me until i was 18 and then thank god my step father came into our life. He married my mom and right after, took me to the court house and adopted me. I told him that it wasn't necessary since I was 18 and starting life as a man but he insisted that he wanted to be there for me until the day he passes away. I still cry till this day that a man who doesn't even have my blood, wants to be there for me for anything. I don't know where I would be without him. Him and my mom have been happily married for 10 years now!

AvactnVayne Report

Final score:

137points

Bill Dolman 2 years ago

That's what a good man does. You have a good man there.

68points

View more comments

#14

"When will we dig up dad?" asked by my almost 5 yo son. He's never met him as dad died three months before birth. This goes along the question "when will dad stop being dead?".

SmoczyCzarownik , Daian Gan Report

Final score:

134points

Debbie Barnes 2 years ago (edited)

Death is so hard to explain to children. Many years ago my son died, when my daughter was 5 years old. Despite trying to explain why her brother was now living in Heaven (can there be any explanation?), she still made up her dolls bed up for him and a jar of rice pudding (that he loved) in the fridge 'for when he came back'....

71points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#15

Specialist appointment and they did the normal thing of checking contact details. They asked if the contact number and details for my wife were still correct. I started crying - my wife passed away this time 12 months ago. Surprising how much one simple question asked in total innocence can bring you to your knee

M1r9f7i9sh , National Cancer Institute Report

Final score:

121points

Stoopham McFernybabes 2 years ago

I did that with a patient, today. I asked if the emergency contact person, [name], was still correct and the patient said “Oh, no - [name’s] in a nursing home now with profound dementia”. I’m so sorry, patient. I really, really am.

65points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#16

'I could never imagine getting cancer at such a young age. How are you this strong/brave/do you stay so positive?' - I’ve stopped counting the amount of people (especially working at the hospital, I’d expect a bit more sensitivity from them) that have asked me that. Yes I’m mid 20’s, but it’s not a choice that I’m 'staying strong.' it’s freaking survival. Every time someone asks me that, it feels like getting punched.

alonelymushroom , Erkan Utu Report

Final score:

120points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

You sigh and get on with your life. My husband always said "just go with the flow and we'll see what happens.". He never complained but the stories about fighting cancer, being brave and strong are bs, You just let it happen.

37points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#17

I always wanted to study psychology in college but my overbearing mother wouldn’t have that so I studied chemistry. In my last semester I took an abnormal psychology class just for fun and I crushed it, ending with a 99% average. After the final, my professor took me outside the classroom and said, “Why didn’t you major in psychology? You would have made a great psychologist.”

That really crushed my soul. I think about that day a lot

Final score:

113points

Vanja Vidovic 2 years ago

It's never too late for studying!

78points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#18

Rough night last night?' Usually asked with a big smile.

I was asked that all the time when I was younger because I had a really obvious tremor. Thing is, I did not drink or do drugs at all and I had no idea what was wrong with me. I was eventually diagnosed with Graves' Disease and treated for it, but I still have a bit of a tremor.

imk , Priscilla Du Preez Report

Final score:

110points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

My friend has a tremor. Her hands shake, not even a bit but really shake as if she's very nervous. I started after she lost her mother to an accident. She can deal with it but people tend to stare or make stupid remarks.

38points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#19

Someone once asked me "don't you want to be a mom?" Yes, I do. But as I'm single, over 40 and not rich, that's probably not going to happen and it devastated me. I had to say "Yes, I'd love that", and then excuse myself to go home and cry.

OhioMegi Report

Final score:

107points

Stoopham McFernybabes 2 years ago

Not that I think you should sacrifice yourself for some idiot, but maybe if you did cry straight away the idiot would realise that this is just not an appropriate question to ask anyone.

52points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#20

"Who do you want to list as your emergency contact?"

At the dentist's office a few weeks after my mom died and four years after my dad died. I felt like bursting into tears because, at 22 years old, I really didn't know.

i_be_snackin Report

Final score:

105points

CatGirl 2 years ago

Babe - that is so hard. I'm sorry.

56points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#21

I was a freshmen in High School in 1992-93. My high school science teacher asked me if I was ever jealous of my older brother(he was a senior). I was kind of confused.

She said, "You know, since he is so smart, popular, and just has everything going for him..."

First time I had ever, in my entire life, considered that people viewed my brother as better than me.

It has honestly kind of stuck with me. That was 26 or 27 years ago.

Mahaloth Report

Final score:

100points

CatGirl 2 years ago

That is so utterly s**t of that teacher.

92points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#22

"So when are you going back for your master's degree?"

I was so proud of getting my bachelor's and had no intention of going back because how rough school was for me.

Cometstarlight Report

Final score:

99points

Lolly 2 years ago

Well done you on your bachelor's 🎊🎊🎊yaaaayyyy🎊🎊🎊 all that hard work! I'm proud of you too 👍👍👍

46points

View more comments

#23

'When will you get better so you can play with us?' My niece who was to young to understand what disabled meant. She's older now and understands I will never get better. And we have adapted play time to do things i can handle as well. But that broke my heart.

littletrashpanda77 , Marcus Aurelius Report

Final score:

98points

Dan 2 years ago

｡:ﾟ(;´∩`;)ﾟ:｡

27points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#24

Why don't you live with your parents?

I live with my grandparents because I didn't want to live with my abusive stepmoms on both sides of the family. They all live down in Texas while I'm in Colorado. Still hurts a little when people ask, though.

lowkey_h8_myself , Scott Webb Report

Final score:

95points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

So glad you have your grandparents

57points

View more comments

#25

Not a question but my 8 year old niece once remarked "you don't laugh anymore".

Edit: this was over a year ago when I was having a rough time but I'm doing much better now. Thank you all for your support and for sharing your stories. I wish you all the best.

Thanks again for the gold kind strangers xx

[deleted] Report

Final score:

95points

shodokai 2 years ago

*hug

12points

View more comments

#26

“How’s your brother doing? Haven’t seen him in a little while.” He passed away 2 years ago. That wasn’t very fun

iAmCleatis , John Thomas Report

Final score:

88points

Samantha Power 2 years ago

That must hurt, however they probably didn't know he had passed x

24points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#27

'How are you handling everything?' - my notary public who also happens to be my boss's boss while notarizing my divorce paperwork. Completing a divorce packet with no help from an attorney can be a real pain, but at least it kept me focused on the bureaucratic bullsh*t nonsense part of it rather than the fact that my 9 year marriage was ending. Turned out that as soon as someone asked me sincerely how I was doing, the answer was not at all well. I went back to my desk and had a panic attack.

oyofmidmidworld , RODNAE Productions Report

Final score:

82points

Stoopham McFernybabes 2 years ago

I’m so sorry, OP. That must have been awful.

17points

View more comments

#28

“so why did you decide to take year off school right now?”

I‘m a pre med student only half way though undergrad, so i get that it’s a weird time to take time off school. But i don’t think my new coworkers realize how personal of a question that is. I can’t tell them it’s because I was hospitalized for 2 weeks after trying to kill my self, jumped right back in to school the next semester, and then failed that miserably before realizing that i need to at least take a year off. so i say, “just really felt like i needed a break :)”

noelleelleon Report

Final score:

81points

N.C. O'Brien 2 years ago

Discharged from Psyche ward during college (after 2 and a half months stay) Friday. Went back to college that Monday. Lasted a week before pulling out of the course as had projects due the following week!! Pressure not worth the paper cert at the end of it

23points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#29

Why don't you have any kids? Sometimes it really bothers me when people ask me this.

MustacheFart69 , Fa Barboza Report

Final score:

78points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

That question should be banned.

70points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#30

I had no friends in summer school and a girl asked me if I had any friends. Like straight up, 'Do you have any friends?' Then became friends with me but still.

boringassy , kyo azuma Report

Final score:

65points

Random Anon 2 years ago

Oh my friends didn't survive the zombies.

27points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#31

This could get covered up but maybe it won't. My most heartbreaking question was
"And who did you used to play for?"
Background context. I come from a family of talented artists and musicians. As a child, I became a sort of music prodigy as I picked up music theory rather quickly along with instrument playing. I used to practice on this very old piano my granny (my great grandma on my dad's side) had. She would patiently listen to me plunk out tunes and became my music mentor.
I had recently been asked by my teacher a couple of get-to-know-you questions and I had said I played for my family but just one person made me better.
My granny passed away back in 2019, and it has been four years since she died on March 12.
I was very close to my granny and her death had hit me hard. Her death was the one who made me realize how little time I had with my loved ones. I ended up just offhandedly saying "My granny."
She asked about my granny and the questions made me uncomfortable before I told the teacher I was uncomfortable and that my granny had died. She just shrugged and continued to ask anyway. My least favorite was
"Did you play anything for her before she died?"
The answer is yes, I played her favorite hymnal but at this point I felt my anxiety act up and I walked out into my other teacher's classroom and told her about the incident. The nosy teacher ended up with a warning and had to give me an apology. Either way, those were some uncomfortable questions.

Final score:

48points

extra-t-grex-trial

grindelwald_the_insomnia_panda 2 years ago

you most likely aren't looking for anything but, I am sorry. your grandmother sounds AWESOME. if you believe in the after life, maybe she and my grandfather are hanging out? my nana says that if there is thunder it is your loved ones bowling.

11points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#32

“You good?” I’ve been struggling with myself a lot lately, mostly relating to my gender identity and my body. Thank god the friend who asked that is willing to help me out with what I need.

Final score:

45points

Sportsgal 2 years ago

Glad you have someone to talk to!

8points

View more comments

Continue reading with Bored Panda Premium

Unlimited content

Ad-free browsing

Dark mode

#33

What's on her face, mom? -little girl

I used to be a cashier and had terrible acne at the time.

lohwatne , Andrea Piacquadio Report

Final score:

25points

Emmydearest 2 years ago

Similar thing happened to me. My driving instructor asked me out of the blue "why do you have so many pimples?". Like...what kind of question in that?! "Why"... If I knew what caused them, I would have done something about it, obviously. It's not a choice, you idiot. And mind that It wasn't a huge acne all over my face, it was a few pimples. Like: I'm 18, I have pimples, it's not a big deal. I'm sure a middle aged driving instructor must have seen people with any sort of "physical defects", by the way.

13points

View more comments

#34

"Why are you so weird?"

I never really fit in, but I'm not sure why this question crushed me so much

yeetgodmcnechass Report

Final score:

25points

El muerto 2 years ago

the only good answer "I'm a special edition"

20points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#35

Why do you work in a factory when you have an honors degree in physics...

elfmere , Jezael Melgoza Report

Final score:

24points

Cody 2 years ago

I worked at a call center for two years after getting a bachelor's degree in physics.

4points

View more comments

#36

My recently divorced ex and I worked at the same place. Divorce was not my idea but he'd found someone new and I was heartbroken. He ended up quitting at her insistence. 6 months after the divorce was final, a coworker asked how ex husband was doing, hadn't seen him since he quit yadda yadda.

Behind my back another coworker was trying to wave 1st coworker off... spent the rest of the shift crying on and off. Apparently coworker #1 was oblivious and didn't know we'd divorced, just thought ex had quit.

xceptn2therule , cottonbro Report

Final score:

23points

ADVERTISEMENT

#37

I worked in retail when I was younger and people would always be like "oh, do you have any ideas for Father's day?" "What'd you get your dad?". My dad committed s*icide when I was 16. They had no way of knowing that but damn if it didn't hurt.

DoNotEatAllTheDonuts Report

Final score:

23points

Joe Reaves 2 years ago

Amazon needs an option for promotional emails where you're fine with being told offers but can opt out of specific things like mother's day or father's day.

14points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#38

when me and my dad and my sister were driving to another town to get away from my mom so we could eat without getting yelled at/stuff thrown at us my suster asked why mommy was so mean, and my dad had to simplify to her level that her mom was an alcoholic. she was six. edit: o shet this blew up thx i guess

[deleted] Report

Final score:

22points

CATMONSTER2018 2 years ago (edited)

But now im curious if they were an alcoholic before/after they got married. And if it's after, then why did they start?' - - - SOrry if this upset anyone ;-; I try not to make anyone mad. I just wanted to ask a question about the past. - - - One of my friends had alcoholic parents. They STARTED drinking after a very close relative died. I'm just curious on the backstory ;-;

-1point

View More Replies...

View more comments

#39

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No."

"Oh. Why not?"

Because I'm a loser, lady, and nobody wants me.

MusedeMented Report

Final score:

22points

Emmydearest 2 years ago

"WhY nOt?" What a stupid question! Did she expected an honest answer by a stranger? Like, "I'm glad you asked. I don't have a boyfriend because I'm too ugly and i have a bad personality so nobody wants me", "...because I'm a lesbian", "...because I've been sexually assaulted and in result I am traumatized so I avoid intimate interactions", "...because my ex cheated on me and stole my money so now I have trust issues"... I mean... Seriously, some people should really start to think twice before talking. And them think some more.

14points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#40

"When are you due?" I wasn't pregnant. Have since lost over 60lbs though.

BumbleBreezeSun , freestocks Report

Final score:

21points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

That’s one of the most stupidest and risky questions one can ask.

22points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#41

'Why don't you ever talk, are you unsociable?' By a classmate when I was in high school. As someone with severe social phobia who was struggling to hide it at all costs and to be normal at the time, I died a little inside.

alytesobstetricans Report

Final score:

21points

Me Oh My 2 years ago

A*****e. That's not an okay question to ask, no matter how innocent the intent.

1point

View more comments

#42

"Why don't you ever go out?" Well, because I don't have anyone to go out with. Damn

elflaco99 , Sasha Freemind Report

Final score:

20points

Ka Se 2 years ago

Then go out alone. At least that is what I do if i want to see something / be somewhere no one else of my acquaintances want to go there/ does not have time

7points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#43

Nonverbal, but the nurse at the flu shot station seemed unsure whether to give me the under-65 or over-65 consent form. If I'm going to be mistaken for being that much older than my actual age, at least it should be in the context of me getting a senior discount.

Frankie_Bow , cottonbro Report

Final score:

19points

MaddaPanda 2 years ago

So…wait, they give you the shots without having your personal info and ID cards in front of them?

6points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#44

One day i said to my mom i was going out with friends and she asked, You have friends? ik it was a joke but damn.. i felt that so hard.

[deleted] Report

Final score:

18points

Feral Heart 2 years ago

that is mean

10points

View more comments

#45

"Are you okay? You seems a little off"

I've been diagnosed with chronic depression and paranoia disorders for years and I thought I was doing a decent job hiding it from all my friends But apparently it wasnt good enough I guess.

graystripe555 Report

Final score:

18points

MN “MN Female” Female 2 years ago

It's not that you're not good enough sweet person, it's a person being sincerely interested in your well being. Don't hide....be open and talk about it. You'll be surprised how much people really understand.

8points

View more comments

#46

My loving girlfriend ( I know backdoor brag) and I were watching a show that opens with a stoner dude playing video games; when his hardworking girlfriend pull up outside he scrambles to pretend like he wasn't being a lazy slob.

My girlfriend off handled says "Oh, man just like us."

About a year ago I had been out of work for 6 months while she had a steady job, for the record I didn't get stoned and play video games--I was constantly applying for jobs and dealing with emotional fallout of having a dozen job interviews that fell through for various reasons.

It was just an innocent comment about the girlfriend getting home....but like damn.

Onepopcornman Report

Final score:

17points

dee dee 2 years ago

Ah I'm sorry that happened. My SO went throught the same thing, minus the comment (i hope). I hope you are in a better place now and that things worked out for you.

8points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#47

Speaking to my coach the other day she asked me "how are you feeling?" And i honestly did my best not to cry my eyes out. I just got out of school and have to figure out what i wanna study next year while balancing 3 jobs that barely gives me enough for rent... so... i feel bad to be honest...

[deleted] Report

Final score:

17points

N.C. O'Brien 2 years ago

Got asked that question once. I said "Ok". She told me that wasn't a feeling. I then said "fine" That's when she realised I actually didn't know what feelings were

4points

#48

What do you see when you look in the mirror each morning?

My friend was having some body issues and she asked me this question since I was one of the most confident people she knew. She learned maybe a bit too much that day.

Cyanora , Lowell So Report

Final score:

16points

Random Anon 2 years ago

Since I started working in my teens, a tired fella wishing he didn't need to wake up when it's still dark outside.

8points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#49

If my girlfriend at the time was my daughter. We're only 2 years different in age but I look old AF. I was only 22 lol...

Gronkalicious Report

Final score:

16points

Rage of Aquarius 2 years ago

Oof, I get confused for my dad's girlfriend ALL the time. It's incredibly awkward, and absolutely terrible. (For reference, he's 45 and looks like an old Norse god with beer gut, and I'm a 16 year old girl.)

7points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#50

After I had my first child in 2013, which was a still birth, we went out together to get some oil for my stomach, because it was recommended to me by my midwife. At the store a woman working there helped us find the right thing and we of course explained what we needed it for, not mentioning the fact, that our daughter died. We did not want to talk about it at the time and did not want to upset anyone.

The woman then asked: „Where is the Baby?“, assuming probably that it was either at home with a grandma or maybe still at the hospital…
A perfectly valid question and I wasn‘t mad at her. We had our time to grief and I am a pragmatic and positiv thinking person, but that one question caught me off guard and my eyes teared up. My husband must have been either affected by the question as well or by my reaction, because he then said shakily that this was the wrong question to ask.

I cannot remember what happened next, I think the woman apologised and we told her it was ok. And it was ok. She couldn‘t have known. It was just so unexpected.

Final score:

15points

Tamra Stiffler 2 years ago

Grief is very sneaky sometimes. You can be having a normal day, doing routine things, then boom - it blindsides you.

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#51

I have a tattoo on my chest that's a song title of my favorite band. I had the tattoo artist do it in the font style of their logo. It's in a runic looking style font and says "My Own Savior". The "S" in Savior" is kinda center of my chest. After about three years of having this tattoo now, someone at my new job last week cornered me asking what kind of "S" that is. Pretty much insinuating that it was some Nazi bolt "S" or something. I had to pull up a picture of the band logo to show it wasn't but f**k it still bothers me, I'm constantly hoping now that no one thinks I'm a Nazi jerk with this tattoo.

Saint0vk1llers Report

Final score:

14points

Dan 2 years ago

Sorry if I offended anyone with the comment.

10points

View more comments

#52

"You're so great, why are you still single?"

Sir_Puppington_Esq Report

Final score:

14points

Lord Mysticlaw 2 years ago

Just lucky, I guess

6points

#53

Went to get my eyebrows waxed today and the lady said “lip too?”

itch-bay Report

Final score:

14points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

It's okay from your beautician, it's her business (in both senses of the word)

19points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#54

I’ve suffered with severe depression since I was 12 as well as numerous other emotional and physical health issues. One day I was explaining to my sister that I was in a lot of pain from a dental abscess so didn’t really want to eat anything at the posh sit down dinner my family were having for my grandad’s wake. She just looked at me and asked “how do you even cope with life?”
I told her life just keeps happening and there’s no way to stop it so you learn to accept that. She just shrugged and walked away. It happened just over a month ago but it still stays with me

Final score:

14points

E Bytes 2 years ago

As someone dealing with similar issues, I am sorry that they didn’t understand. Thank you for continuing to exist even though it’s hard.

3points

#55

My mum used to complain that my dad didn't take her to the theatre so one Christmas I decided to suprise her with tickets to the nutcracker for us with the little bit of money we had left from my husbands redundancy pay. On the way in the car I asked if she was surprised to which she replied "well I should have been at my Christmas work party but never mind". Honestly thought I was doing a nice thing and was upset over this remark but wanted to make the best out of it so I never said anything back. Later found out she was actually supposed to be seeing the man she was having an affair with while my dad was dying.

Final score:

14points

Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago

Damn, what a thoroughly awful person.

13points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#56

A friend looked at me and said 'I know we've talked about it before, but how did you break your nose?' I've never broken my nose this is just how it looks.

HumpOnALog , Klaudia Ekert Report

Final score:

13points

M O'Connell 2 years ago

I have one of those, my nose strongly favors one side of my face. I've explained this before, and have had people I barely know tell me that I am wrong and must have broken it.

4points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#57

My 5 year old cousin asked me where Grandpa was when we were getting ready to head to his funeral. Everyone went silent and we just kind of stared at each other until my dad managed to distract her.

It was brutal.

cumulonimbus123 Report

Final score:

13points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

Not the same of course, but the first time we went to my mother in law's after my father in law died, my dog, who normally would never go into bedrooms, went in every room in the house. I swear he was looking for Tom. He never did it again

13points

View more comments

#58

I dropped out of university a few months back because I wasn’t happy. I’ve since moved home and sometimes at work, people I haven’t seen in a while will approach me and ask how school is going. It was my decision to leave university but when people ask it about I can’t help but feel judged when I say I’ve dropped out.

HeartlessOak709 Report

Final score:

13points

Wednesday 2 years ago

There are so many things to do - University is only one of many

1point

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#59

My 6 year-old little sister asked "what happened?" pointing at the self-harm scars on my legs

hellomydarkfriend Report

Final score:

13points

Rage of Aquarius 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

View More Replies...

View more comments

#60

“How’s [my child] settling into kindergarten?”
Suuuuuuch an innocent question.

Of course I’d say “oh, fine”, but the answer really was “It’s horrific. There have been numerous incidents, meltdowns, he’s been violent, been bullied, tried to run away from school, we’ve been called into school and had multiple meetings etc., and now he’s being assessed for autism. I feel like an awful mother, I’m struggling to feel any affection for him some days, I want to run away, my marriage is suffering as is my relationships with my other kids. I want to run away and hide and never come out again.”
Obviously not as awful as some of the other stories here, but that innocent question did crush me a little. We’re going ok now.

Final score:

13points

Stoopham McFernybabes

Huddo's sister 2 years ago

It doesn't matter how much someone else is suffering, your pain is real and valid. No matter the results of the autism assessment, if you care enough to worry you are not a good mother, it is not your fault. Parenting is hard even without a child with a disability. It sounds like there is support from teacher/health professional so it is likely to get better as everyone finds strategies to help him in school and daily life.

3points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#61

Didn't happen to me, but it happened to my mom. We were in one of those communal showers at a public pool. My mom has a lot of scars, from having me and my siblings delivered via c-section, various surgeries, and cancer. A little boy wandered into the shower we were using, said "A monster!" and ran out. My mom cried after he left, even though we both knew he didn't know any better, as he was about 4.

Final score:

13points

Me Oh My (He/They)

Me Oh My (Submission author) 2 years ago

And for one that ACTUALLY happened to me, someone asked me why I never talked to anyone. I was recovering from a "friendship" with a psychologically and emotionally abusive person, whom I had only just gotten up the courage to ditch. I had severe trust issues at the time, and frankly, I still do, though I've been working on them.

10points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#62

"Are you feeling better yet?"
As a teenager with a newly diagnosed chronic illness dealing with a huge lifestyle change because of it, it hurts whenever I'm asked this question. I'm not going to get 'better,' at least not for years, but the same well-meaning people ask me this question so often that I realize they don't really pay attention to the answer.

Final score:

12points

Moosy Girl 2 years ago

I feel this one. „Are you better yet?” „Are you cured now?” „Are you STILL sick?” …‚Chronic’ is a very hard concept for anyone not dealing with it.

4points

View more comments

#63

Went to the Doctor's for a regular check-up and they asked me if I went out with my friends and I simply replied most are married and in other cities and the rest are working in other cities (I am currently looking for a job) so when they come to visit we go out and catch up. To which she replied, "So, no friends?"

That definitely hurt.

iknowthisischeesy Report

Final score:

11points

Vanja Vidovic 2 years ago

More like: "No Doctor!"

4points

#64

“Are you okay?” Whenever I get this simple question I’ll realize I’m not okay at all

chuuya28 Report

Final score:

11points

Stoopham McFernybabes 2 years ago

There is a mental health awareness day in my country called “RUOK Day” a day to check in with the people around you and see if they’re needing support. Great idea - terrible execution as the initial promotion didn’t really include guidelines as to appropriate ways to do this. And so, I found myself, in the midst of postnatal depression, thinking I had no friends, my husband didn’t love me, I was a terrible mother, carrying my 3mo baby through a hardware store so I could try and get just one damn thing right that week, being asked by a chirpy young cashier “It’s RUOK Day today so we met asking all our customers RUOK. So…RUOK?”. I had a long hard cry back in the car park.

4points

View More Replies...

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#65

“What you’re looking at?” Dude, I have strabismus…

Final score:

10points

Duck Master 2 years ago

What is strabismus?

3points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#66

I once asked a lady I was meeting for coffee ‘what’s wrong?’ in regard to her prosthetic leg. I meant ‘what happened?’ We were getting to know each other so the question wasn’t off limits but the wording, f**k me, the word ‘wrong’ sent her off a little cliff. She kept crying and saying ‘there’s nothing WRONG with me!’ Then she asked me to call her a cab because she ‘wasn’t ready for all this PRESSURE!’ Her friend, who set us up, called apologizing next day, turns out her friend had issues and just wasn’t ready to date.

Whyevenbotherbeing Report

Final score:

9points

G R 2 years ago

That's a terrible thing to say to someone you just met.

7points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#67

How was your day? It hurt when people ask this because I know they don't really want to know if it was bad.

Final score:

4points

Wednesday 2 years ago

If it's not great or if it's super great, I ask in return, "Do you really want to know, or would you prefer the benign pleasantries..." People who know me, will answer honestly, one way or the other. People who do not will always say, "The Truth, of course." So I watch for that flicker in the eye, or facial expression that is either open (tell them) or tight, tense (I'm fine, and you?)

0points

ADVERTISEMENT

#68

"How are you doing?"

That always manages to break me. They asked me that after my friend died unexpectedly (this was three years ago. We were going into 8th grade). They asked me when I was being bullied so severely that I was su*cidal. I always said I was okay, because I have to be the strong one. I'm the therapist friend. That's what I do. I hated it when people asked me that because I would finally break.

But somehow, it's worse when no one asks it. When they either don't notice or don't care. I'm not doing alright at the moment. My parents are divorcing, I'm stuck in the middle as the marriage counselor. They still aren't fully behind me being trans. My home doesn't feel as safe. They still don't support my autism diagnosis. I'm not okay.

I hated it when people asked how I was doing. Now, I wish somebody would.

Final score:

4points

Lukas-not-Luca (he/him) 2 years ago

Oh, I'm so sorry... this all must hurt so bad.... I'm here for you.

1point

View more comments

#69

Once I had a little girl ask me if I was pregnant.

I'm twelve.

Final score:

3points

That queer kid 2 years ago

Oof

0points

ADVERTISEMENT

#70

"How's your mom?" Asked by a friend's mum. We were all catching up, so it was a normal question. But I was so relieved that my friend asked me to go to the theater with them because my mum (who has MS) was either hit by a bout of her Seasonal Affective Disorder or went off her antidepressants (she never told me what it was this time), and had been bedridden for almost two months. I was so glad to be out of the house and when she asked that it just reminded me of what I was going home to. I'm not a sensitive person by any means, but that question made me tear up.

Final score:

3points

Rage of Aquarius

Connie Martin 2 years ago

I had a friend who would come for a visit from another city, staying with us, and we'd take her out to breakfast. My mother was in another city, bedridden after a series of small strokes, no recovery likely, really struggling and difficult. We'd be chatting at the table about all kinds of different subjects, but at the moment our food arrived she'd invariably say brightly, "How's your mom?" She knew ALL ABOUT my mom. Knew the only change would be if she got worse or DIED. I'd be sitting there staring at my breakfast with knots in my stomach. I'd swear she did this on purpose, but she was really a good-hearted person otherwise.

1point

View more comments

#71

I was in the care system here in the UK from when I was 5 (1979) to when I was 18 (1992). The amount of times I was asked about my parents (both dead by the time I was 8), why I lived in a kids home, why I was fostered, how did I cope. All made me scream inside. Even still today I’m asked about my family every now and then.

Final score:

3points

Naesil 2 years ago

At least you can have good answer now, "well they both have been dead since I was 8 so nothing new, how are your parents doing?"

2points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#72

“I don’t mean these to be offensive, but like why do all the guys want you”

truisluv Report

Final score:

2points

Insert Generic Username 2 years ago

Humble-brag. Gross.

11points

View More Replies...

View more comments

#73

I once had someone ask me why do you have no friends? We were in elementary school, and I was kinda bullied/used for grades. I know it's not really the same as everyone else's, but it did hurt. And my parents still ask me(jokingly) "you have friends?" When I ask to go hang out with them.

Final score:

2points

Wednesday 2 years ago

There are so many things parents say to children that are supposed to be helpful, or funny, but are very hurtful. If you child gets upset when you try to make a joke - don't do that anymore... I had to learn the hard way with my kids - all very sensitive...

1point

#74

As an ICU nurse, I was holding pressure on a patient's femoral artery after a cardiac procedure. He noticed the wedding band on a chain around my neck and asked, "So, are you a married man?" My wife of two years died two weeks prior.

Final score:

2points

Theoretical Empiricist

Wednesday 2 years ago

Ring on a chain usually means the person died. Not always, because some people want their ring on them whilst doing something, like a surgery, where the ring would get in the way, but better to let this question lie.

0points

#75

My boyfriend saying that he is not attracted to me anymore.

Final score:

1point

Rage of Aquarius 2 years ago

Not a question

1point

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#76

Is Nirvana a clothing brand? kinda broke my heart lmao

Final score:

1point

KurtCobainofficiallmao

#77

My boyfriend of one year saying he didn't find me beautiful any more. I should have broken up with him long before, around the time that he said he never thought he'd be with anyone who didn't have perfect teeth.

Final score:

0points

#78

My friend (who also has depression) blatantly telling me that he didn’t consider my depression as an excuse to not finish my homework. He of all people should understand… I didn’t ask to have zero motivation most of the time and feel unhappy and tired all the time…

Final score:

0points

Inflatablelover

RK Barbo 2 years ago

That's a crappy thing to say. Depression effects everyone differently.

4points

#79

My boyfriend of one year saying he didn't find me beautiful any more. I should have broken up with him long before, around the time that he said he never thought he'd be with anyone who didn't have perfect teeth.

Final score:

-3points

ADVERTISEMENT

Liucija Adomaite

Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

Justinas Keturka

I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

What do you think ?

Number 5 2 years ago

I was unfortunately born with what people would call a "resting b*tch face". I just can't really get my face to emote that much. I know this is rude of me, but I've gotten so sick of hearing "Are you sick?" or "Are you mad?" from random people I've just started to say "Nope, just ugly."

14points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

Brilliant answer!

3points

Load More Replies...

Beth S 2 years ago

I feel so bad reading most of these and I am happy that I am someone that keeps my curiosities, thoughts, and opinions to myself. I feel that people need to learn that just because a thought enters your head it doesn't mean it needs to come out your mouth.

7points

CatGirl 2 years ago

People saying to me, 'You have two PhDs and you're a high school tutor?' Yes, and I don't even clear $800 a week and no, I don't want a 'proper' job because I can't handle being trapped in a place eight hours a day. And do I feel like a total failure? Yes, yes I do

7points

Destiney Haddox 2 years ago

You're not a failure! You're doing what you can and want to do and cannot compare that to anyone else. The Beatles - "there's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be" has always made me feel a bit better. Anyway, much love and have fun at your proper job!

0points

Load More Replies...

Friend Kelli 2 years ago

My brother was born deaf and hit by a car when he was five. When he was older he kept asking why it happened to him. He eventually died from his injuries but my heart is broken still.

3points

Emmydearest 2 years ago

I don't understand. Why do some posts get changed and some parts are cancelled? The post title was "people shared innocent etc" and now it's "30 people are sharing etc", and some of the "chapters" are missing and the comments to those are missing too. It's not the first time that's happened. Why is that? What's the point? It's getting very annoying at this point.

2points

Derek Clark 2 years ago

I always get asked "Why don't you work?" When I tell them I'm on disability, they ask me why because I'm young and healthy. Nope, I'm not. I have pain every day, need a wheelchair if I want to go to say an amusement park because I can't walk long distances, I have EDS. I hate it when people act so ignorant.

1point

Pamela Blue 2 years ago

It's very hard to generalize like this. There are people who don't want questions asked. But then there are others who would cry that "nobody asked if I was okay!" It's a tough one to be sure, but we can only do what we hope is right in the circumstances.

1point

Awsomemom52 2 years ago (edited)

About 6 months after my mother died, I met an older friend of hers who probably no longer lived nearby. She immediately asked me how my mother was doing. I have two children who were very attached to my mother and were still suffering greatly from the loss. I had to "be strong and function," which is why I couldn't really grieve at the time. I then had a "breakdown" after her question...without warning. The poor woman was clearly shocked and had no idea what was wrong with me... and I was too "upset" to explain anything. It was in the middle of the city and she took me to a coffee shop, sat me in a quiet corner and waited with me for almost an hour until I calmed down.

1point

Carole Reid 2 years ago

So many things we go through and keep to ourselves. Even if you can act like everything is better, it's very hard.

1point

PitbullmomAF 2 years ago

My mom and dad moved back to the states (military family) a year after I got married. She worked very hard to keep in touch with friends, but some just never responded. (1991, so snail mail). Four years later she died of melanoma. A few months afterwards I ran into one of her 'closest ' friends who asled me how she was. I looked her in the eyes and said dead, but you would have known if you'd kept in touch. I don't regret it.

1point

Rahul Pawa 2 years ago

This whole thread reinforces my effort to not ask questions any more. Completely unnecessary. I can express a feeling, or an interest without asking a question. I've come to see that questions put an expectation on the person being asked.

1point

An Unpopular Opinion. 2 years ago

"Are you okay?" Is a big one for me, I'm very good at staying together but the second someone notices me enough to ask I WILL start sobbing

1point

Allinson Family 2 years ago

I have unfortunately lost 2 babies in late pregnancy after 34 weeks. Most terrifying experience I have ever been through. When at 20 I'm daughter was still born I had a wonderful midwife look after me she really knew how to care. Fast forward 9 years my son was still born and the very same lovely midwife walks into the room and says 'my god! Not you!' . She meant no harm at all but her words stick with me. I so very wish it wasn't me

1point

Sarah 2 years ago

I'd like to add one to the list. If a perfect stranger has some kind of injury, unless they are actually hurt in that moment and need your help, DONT ASK. As a coping mechanism for stress I used to scratch at my skin. I didn't know I was doing it when it was happening and would even do it in my sleep. So many people, complete strangers, would see bandages and ask what was wrong. I didn't want to talk about it. I felt stupid. I felt crazy. My mother suggested I start replying with "my boyfriend beat me up again", just to see what happens. Were these people asking because they actually cared about me, a stranger? No. It's curiosity. Of course, I didn't actually give anyone that reply. Didnt want to make someone else feel stupid along with me. SO I usually made some kind of joke with an obviously made-up answer. Most of the time that let the asker know I didn't want to talk about it. Moral of the story; do not ask if its just curiosity, not genuine concern.

1point

Sarah 2 years ago

A few years ago my niece, who was 5 or 6 at the time, shot some rapid-fire ones at me: Aunty Sarah, how come you don't have kids? Aunty Sarah, how come you arent married? Aunty Sarah, why do you have a big belly? Aunty Sarah, blah blah blah.... All within about 5 minutes. Yikes! LOL I told her this years later and she said something like "did you want to punch me?" yep. Sure did kid. LOL

1point

Angie Falzarano 4 weeks ago

I know its going to come later but I don't look my age very active. Unfortunately on Sunday evening I had a heart attack. When I was talking to one of my neighbors today after getting home from the hospital and I explained what had happened she was shocked. She says you're so active. So the question is going to come and I need to prepare myself.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago

I first moved in the beginning of 2020 for my hubby's new job. A city I loved and made a life to a small town I hated. Then covid happened and the next year and a half was difficult. A life transition suddenly became difficult with no reference on how to cope. I had a job in tourism and the first summer was difficult with tourists not obeying, getting angry with things beyond my control, the threats. With everything, my depression came harder than ever before. By the time the next tourist season started, I asked for a month off to reset myself, I knew I wasn't doing well enough to continue without a break. I honestly thought it would help, but the last few days of my "holiday" I was searching for any reason not to come back, I wasn't ready. Because during my time away a new computer system was put in, the manager was hanging with me a few days, on the last day of new training she pulled me aside and asked if I was OK. I nearly lost it.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago

18 months of living here and nobody asked if I was OK before then. Nobody had noticed that I was struggling hard and could no longer separate my job from my problems. I wasn't ok. I handed in my keys that weekend, I wasn't ready to deal with covid tourists again and I couldn't ask them to let me leave for 3 more months. It's been almost a year and I finally feel ready to return to the work force. But only part time, time off discovered a physical issue as well.

0points

Load More Replies...

SC de F. 2 years ago

"Why are you working here?" I'd just finished my degree in linguistics and translation. Then the recession hit, where both my parents and my sister lost their jobs. I couldn't continue my education for licenses, but then, even licensed translators were now an unnecessary luxury thanks to budget cuts. After selling our home, we all moved in with the various relatives across the country, willing to take at least one of us in. I finally got a job at a bookstore, and to be clear, I loved it. I was a very good seller, and very social with customers. It was always the business-type individuals, button-down shirts, two cell phones, and polished shoes. They would stare incredulous at me, and ask that question, a painful reminder of a destroyed dream. I always kept my response simple, "Why? are you hiring?"

0points

Number 5 2 years ago

I was unfortunately born with what people would call a "resting b*tch face". I just can't really get my face to emote that much. I know this is rude of me, but I've gotten so sick of hearing "Are you sick?" or "Are you mad?" from random people I've just started to say "Nope, just ugly."

14points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

Brilliant answer!

3points

Load More Replies...

Beth S 2 years ago

I feel so bad reading most of these and I am happy that I am someone that keeps my curiosities, thoughts, and opinions to myself. I feel that people need to learn that just because a thought enters your head it doesn't mean it needs to come out your mouth.

7points

CatGirl 2 years ago

People saying to me, 'You have two PhDs and you're a high school tutor?' Yes, and I don't even clear $800 a week and no, I don't want a 'proper' job because I can't handle being trapped in a place eight hours a day. And do I feel like a total failure? Yes, yes I do

7points

Destiney Haddox 2 years ago

You're not a failure! You're doing what you can and want to do and cannot compare that to anyone else. The Beatles - "there's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be" has always made me feel a bit better. Anyway, much love and have fun at your proper job!

0points

Load More Replies...

Friend Kelli 2 years ago

My brother was born deaf and hit by a car when he was five. When he was older he kept asking why it happened to him. He eventually died from his injuries but my heart is broken still.

3points

Emmydearest 2 years ago

I don't understand. Why do some posts get changed and some parts are cancelled? The post title was "people shared innocent etc" and now it's "30 people are sharing etc", and some of the "chapters" are missing and the comments to those are missing too. It's not the first time that's happened. Why is that? What's the point? It's getting very annoying at this point.

2points

Derek Clark 2 years ago

I always get asked "Why don't you work?" When I tell them I'm on disability, they ask me why because I'm young and healthy. Nope, I'm not. I have pain every day, need a wheelchair if I want to go to say an amusement park because I can't walk long distances, I have EDS. I hate it when people act so ignorant.

1point

Pamela Blue 2 years ago

It's very hard to generalize like this. There are people who don't want questions asked. But then there are others who would cry that "nobody asked if I was okay!" It's a tough one to be sure, but we can only do what we hope is right in the circumstances.

1point

Awsomemom52 2 years ago (edited)

About 6 months after my mother died, I met an older friend of hers who probably no longer lived nearby. She immediately asked me how my mother was doing. I have two children who were very attached to my mother and were still suffering greatly from the loss. I had to "be strong and function," which is why I couldn't really grieve at the time. I then had a "breakdown" after her question...without warning. The poor woman was clearly shocked and had no idea what was wrong with me... and I was too "upset" to explain anything. It was in the middle of the city and she took me to a coffee shop, sat me in a quiet corner and waited with me for almost an hour until I calmed down.

1point

Carole Reid 2 years ago

So many things we go through and keep to ourselves. Even if you can act like everything is better, it's very hard.

1point

PitbullmomAF 2 years ago

My mom and dad moved back to the states (military family) a year after I got married. She worked very hard to keep in touch with friends, but some just never responded. (1991, so snail mail). Four years later she died of melanoma. A few months afterwards I ran into one of her 'closest ' friends who asled me how she was. I looked her in the eyes and said dead, but you would have known if you'd kept in touch. I don't regret it.

1point

Rahul Pawa 2 years ago

This whole thread reinforces my effort to not ask questions any more. Completely unnecessary. I can express a feeling, or an interest without asking a question. I've come to see that questions put an expectation on the person being asked.

1point

An Unpopular Opinion. 2 years ago

"Are you okay?" Is a big one for me, I'm very good at staying together but the second someone notices me enough to ask I WILL start sobbing

1point

Allinson Family 2 years ago

I have unfortunately lost 2 babies in late pregnancy after 34 weeks. Most terrifying experience I have ever been through. When at 20 I'm daughter was still born I had a wonderful midwife look after me she really knew how to care. Fast forward 9 years my son was still born and the very same lovely midwife walks into the room and says 'my god! Not you!' . She meant no harm at all but her words stick with me. I so very wish it wasn't me

1point

Sarah 2 years ago

I'd like to add one to the list. If a perfect stranger has some kind of injury, unless they are actually hurt in that moment and need your help, DONT ASK. As a coping mechanism for stress I used to scratch at my skin. I didn't know I was doing it when it was happening and would even do it in my sleep. So many people, complete strangers, would see bandages and ask what was wrong. I didn't want to talk about it. I felt stupid. I felt crazy. My mother suggested I start replying with "my boyfriend beat me up again", just to see what happens. Were these people asking because they actually cared about me, a stranger? No. It's curiosity. Of course, I didn't actually give anyone that reply. Didnt want to make someone else feel stupid along with me. SO I usually made some kind of joke with an obviously made-up answer. Most of the time that let the asker know I didn't want to talk about it. Moral of the story; do not ask if its just curiosity, not genuine concern.

1point

Sarah 2 years ago

A few years ago my niece, who was 5 or 6 at the time, shot some rapid-fire ones at me: Aunty Sarah, how come you don't have kids? Aunty Sarah, how come you arent married? Aunty Sarah, why do you have a big belly? Aunty Sarah, blah blah blah.... All within about 5 minutes. Yikes! LOL I told her this years later and she said something like "did you want to punch me?" yep. Sure did kid. LOL

1point

Angie Falzarano 4 weeks ago

I know its going to come later but I don't look my age very active. Unfortunately on Sunday evening I had a heart attack. When I was talking to one of my neighbors today after getting home from the hospital and I explained what had happened she was shocked. She says you're so active. So the question is going to come and I need to prepare myself.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago

I first moved in the beginning of 2020 for my hubby's new job. A city I loved and made a life to a small town I hated. Then covid happened and the next year and a half was difficult. A life transition suddenly became difficult with no reference on how to cope. I had a job in tourism and the first summer was difficult with tourists not obeying, getting angry with things beyond my control, the threats. With everything, my depression came harder than ever before. By the time the next tourist season started, I asked for a month off to reset myself, I knew I wasn't doing well enough to continue without a break. I honestly thought it would help, but the last few days of my "holiday" I was searching for any reason not to come back, I wasn't ready. Because during my time away a new computer system was put in, the manager was hanging with me a few days, on the last day of new training she pulled me aside and asked if I was OK. I nearly lost it.

0points

LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago

18 months of living here and nobody asked if I was OK before then. Nobody had noticed that I was struggling hard and could no longer separate my job from my problems. I wasn't ok. I handed in my keys that weekend, I wasn't ready to deal with covid tourists again and I couldn't ask them to let me leave for 3 more months. It's been almost a year and I finally feel ready to return to the work force. But only part time, time off discovered a physical issue as well.

0points

Load More Replies...

SC de F. 2 years ago

"Why are you working here?" I'd just finished my degree in linguistics and translation. Then the recession hit, where both my parents and my sister lost their jobs. I couldn't continue my education for licenses, but then, even licensed translators were now an unnecessary luxury thanks to budget cuts. After selling our home, we all moved in with the various relatives across the country, willing to take at least one of us in. I finally got a job at a bookstore, and to be clear, I loved it. I was a very good seller, and very social with customers. It was always the business-type individuals, button-down shirts, two cell phones, and polished shoes. They would stare incredulous at me, and ask that question, a painful reminder of a destroyed dream. I always kept my response simple, "Why? are you hiring?"

0points

Related on Bored Panda

Related on Bored Panda

Trending on Bored Panda

Also on Bored Panda