Be careful of what you post online, because it can always come back at you like a boomerang. This advice is older than the internet itself, but still, many people think it won’t happen to them.
Think again! There’s even an entire subreddit known as “Clever Comebacks” dedicated to responses and comments so witty and so savage that they roasted the barbecue out of the OP. Some comebacks are not just ‘oh snap’ but rather ‘oh smack,’ and they’re just totally hilarious.
Below we selected some of the most clever and funny comebacks screenshotted and shared on this community, so pull your seat closer and upvote the best ones as you go. After you’re done, be sure to check out our previous features with clever comebacks here, here and here.
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Samee, But Different
Well Well Well
Do You Have One?
Atheists, Christians And Cats
I don't think they buy and sell Christians. I think you find them lying around outside liquor stores, gay bars, etc, looking for people to harrass. You just scoop them up.
Why Don't You Stand Up For Yourself?
The Greatest Genius Of Our Time
I'm Gonna Use This One
The Third World Refugee
Found It On Twitter. Hope I Am Not Too Late
thank god, the notion of being able to have these two specimens is almost scarier than covid itself
Why Would They Need To Am I Rite?
We are shutting off your brain, 9 to 5, it’s not like your using it anyways
Just Another Reason To Keep My Purple Hair
Definitely Atheists That Do This
I get accused of worshipping the devil b/c I'm atheist. Ummm I don't believe in God thus I don't believe in the devil either
devil is actually a christian deity. Remind them that Satanism is a Christian religion and it freaks their s**t out
Load More Replies...It really is interesting to me that people who choose not to indulge in magical thinking are so looked down upon by people who believe in magic, revolving around a deity who taught it was wrong to look down on people. I was in a museum to see an exhibit of Hindu art. I was standing beside a gorgeous statue of Ganesha. A couple Southern Baptist women walked up and one said "I can't BELIEVE there are people who believe in a floppy eared elephant god!" I said "and amazingly, that was said by someone who believes in flying creatures and holy ghosts!" My friend restrained me, because I had a lot more to say... about things like respect .
This! I get mad when people accuse atheists of "pushing their ideas on everyone" b/c it's simply not true. At least it's not true for me or any other atheist I know. Most of us are very secretive b/c it can hurt us in real life. It could cost us a job, or even place is in physical danger. I talk about it online but very rarely in person. However, religious people don't realize how many times a day religion pops up. It is everywhere. I deal with it on a daily basis and I'm generally not bothered. I'm a "live and let live" type person but when people started accusing atheists of being out there, like we're trying to convert the world, that's just BS and I will get mad.
"... like we're trying to convert the world..." Well, see, we're "converting the world" by living regular lives instead of being criminals or living in the gutter like we're supposed to. We're being bad examples. Some believers see we're not suffering the wrath of God and start thinking maybe they had been fed tall tales.
Load More Replies...Like Ron Reagan says: "Lifelong atheist. Not afraid of burning in Hell."
I always say, "I wouldn't want to go to heaven anyway. Just look at the people who claim to going to be there."
Load More Replies...Oh yes. We love the missionary work to save the souls of the poor believers. Evangelical Athiesm- is so embedded in everyday culture its practically invisible 👍😜
Load More Replies...They forgot about carrying and quoting the atheism book they don't really understand because it is all written in metaphors but feel superior about it because the atheism guide person explained it to them in the most profitable way.
In my neighborhood, we are absolutely plagued with white shirt and tie wearing guys on bicycles who blanket the neighborhood, beating on doors, and leaving pamphlets everywhere.
Load More Replies...im atheist and I actually try to avoid the subject usually because I don't want to offend anyone. this reply is just like srsly spot-on xD
Atheists are just normal people. They receive a lot of unreasonable, undeserved hate.
Don't forget about those atheist bumper stickers you see: "HONK if you don't believe in Jesus."
The comments here make me think about some of my favorite lyrics about religion. "You argue and you bicker and you fight Atheists and Catholics, Jews and Hindus argue day and night Over what they think is true But no one entertains the thought that maybe God does not believe in you."..."from God's perspective" by Bo Burnham.
Oh I don't worship the devil. We're pals. Equals. Though sometimes I wish the jerk wouldn't cheat at whatever game we're playing.
yeah, he always wins at chess, it gets boring
Load More Replies...I’ve been accused of trying to start a fight bc I dared to mention that I didn’t believe in God in a conversation about religion
To accept ones own utter insignificance, within a life that still holds the possibility of impacing ones immediate surroundings -- to be human to the fullest, and feel the depths of loneliness and pain. To feel the responsibility of being a part of a society, to make decisions that takes effort, and come from within, not from a book. That is what we are here on earth to experience. To feel, sense, and then loose again. And that's also all that there is. No meaning. Picking up someone else's old fantasy of eternal life is embarrassingly uncreative ( i could come up with 5 better plots in an evening). To want eternal life in itself is just greed, a lacking ability to grasp the moment, and an mortifying fear of ones own insignificance.
I've heard before "Atheists are just afraid of/mad at god!" Uh, we don't believe in god...
No theory of mind. Don't understand that other people have internal worlds of their own.
Load More Replies...When you look at history, most conflicts and wars aren’t caused by atheists, it’s those religious people. I believe in god but people like you seem to be the problem. Accept everyone you might learn something.
How about all those pro-atheist laws we keep passing to shut down businesses on certain days so people can go to atheist gatherings?
I do wear a Baphomet necklace & have an inverted pentacle tattoo, but most Bible wavers think being a Satanist means believing in the devil rather than knowing what an atheist even is so it’s a moot point for this kind of numbskull. I see it as a more aesthetically tasteful version of wearing a “no soapbox sermons or Jehovah’s witnesses please cos I’m too old to humour your b******t” sign around my neck.
As a Christian speaking here, I really hate it when people try to force religion on others. If anyone on here as been the victim of an angry mob of converters (Is that right term?) I'm sorry. People can be disrespectful all to often.
As an atheist, I can honestly say I would really like to be left the f**k alone by anybody wishing to convince me their brand of religion is superior. I don't care if you think it's superior, just keep it to yourself, and quit pestering me about it!
Ah the same old discussion about the Old Villainous Heavens...
I'm a proud atheist and only bring it up in context. Like when a bunch of old, conservative men impose their beliefs on my body.
Last time I checked, it isn't atheists that start wars and kill innocents for not believing in something...
I have debated going door to door with Darwin’s the Origin of Species.
Whatever religion we do or do not claim is meaningless if we do not live by what we say we believe.
Lost to prehistory - people predate the invention of gods. Theism, or specifically animism, developed in response to external factors in the natural world - thunderstorms, fire, drought, a good hunting day in a memorable place
Load More Replies...I am “ faith based”, not atheist, but really dislike the other “c word” ! This post is sooo funny!
As a Wiccan witch, I have some friends that are Christian and nice and accepting, but like I was also told today by someone that crystal energy is fake and I was delusional. Luckily he stopped replying when I offered to send him links to scientific papers on natural energy studies that have been done. But like, I am EXHAUSTED.
(side note you can be wiccan without witchcraft and you can do witchcraft without being wiccan. Some of the most accepting Christians I've ever met were witches and honestly their approach is so beautiful. Like they are trying to connect with the earth and the world around them and worshipping it in honor of God. It's actually super nice. I've met many lovely secular witches as well, who don't worship any Deities)
Load More Replies...Sorry to say this but at least in Germany indeed atheists more than once and in a very impolite way tried to convert me. I'm for free choice of Religion and keeping your religious believes to yourself and not converting anyone to anything. It's even possible to discuss Religion with people from other religions if not for Atheist starting belittling you for being religious. May be different in your homecountry especially the US or islamistic countries where religious fanatics are going after you.
You should be challenged - because your beliefs are carrying with them so much discrimination and social control.
Load More Replies...There are a handful of militant atheists that take it too far, not nearly as many of them as there are christians that take it too far tho
Except that when militant atheists "take it too far" they shout at people, whereas when militant Christians "take it too far" they throw acid at doctors outside abortion clinics.
Load More Replies...you accuately defined atheists: (necklaces and earrings) There is no greater atheistic 'jewelry' than with tattoos. The majority of all tattoo work is done in satanic symbolism. (gigantic monuments) Some of the largest monuments all over the world were built dedicated to demons. (yell- how much they love atheism) Exactly what is really at the core of pro-abortionist and gay-rallies. (tell people around the world they should be atheist) What the internet was originally, (ultimately) intended for. (sculptures, pictures of the first atheist) As every person from kindergarden to college are brainwashed to Darwinism. (screaming how they love atheism) Garbage websites, like this, dominated, controlled and manipulated by screaming atheists. So you're 0 for 6. Face it, atheists are not just pathological liars, but more human beings have been killed in the name of atheism, over the course of history of mankind, than every other source of death by 100s of millions.
Darwin wasn't an atheist, you silly sod. Everything you say here is just paranoid ramblings with no basis in fact.
Load More Replies...The British and the Dutch were once great trading nations and sailed their ships around the world. Wherever they went, all new discovered nations had their own gods. This brings us to the conclusion that God didn´t create man, but mankind created their gods. Religion is good for people (becourse every civilisation created them), even Darwin would agree.
you accurately defined atheists: (necklaces and earrings) There is no greater atheistic 'jewelry' than with tattoos. The majority of all tattoo work is done in satanic symbolism. (gigantic monuments) Some of the largest monuments all over the world were built dedicated to demons. (yell- how much they love atheism) Exactly what is really at the core of pro-abortionist and gay-rallies. (tell people around the world they should be atheist) What the internet was originally, (ultimately) intended for. (sculptures, pictures of the first atheist) As every person from kindergarden to college are brainwashed to Darwinism. (screaming how they love atheism) Garbage websites, like this, dominated, controlled and manipulated by screaming atheists. So you're 0 for 6. Face it, atheists are not just pathological liars, but more human beings have been killed in the name of psychotic atheism, over the course of history of mankind, than every other source of death by 100s of millions.
Darwin wasn't an atheist, you silly sod. Everything you say here is just paranoid ramblings with no basis in fact.
Load More Replies...Whoa! It seems in the comments there are people that seem too confident in their knowledge of religion to the point of arguing. Show us your degree in theology or religious studies if you are going to be that extreme about it.
Difference is, atheists don't have a church that systematically defends child molesters.
Load More Replies...Nope. We don't worship anything. If you think everyone needs to worship, that just means you have no theory of mind. You're projecting your own personality onto everyone else because you don't understand that other people think differently to you.
Load More Replies...Both Magnus Carlsen And I Can Play Chess
The Entitlement
What A Good Reply
The Only Reasonable Response
I Mean They've Got A Good Point
Some People… Are Not The Smartest
Keep Your Stick On The Ice
They Must Have Had A Religious Exemption
They also had lots of incest. Or just the kids did. Either way, they were the very first Lannisters.
British Got No Chill
Put The Blame Where It Belongs
The Call Is Coming From Inside The House
You Sure You Aren’t The One Here Illegally?
Educated Comeback
I Could See That Happening
No, No. He's Got A Point
Trust Me, I'm A Doctor!
*whispers...ohhh Burn*
Rare Twitter W
I Like Tomatoes
Why is the imperial system like that? I am curious. Metric kind of makes sense since 10 mm make 1 cm but what is the reason for a foot to be 12 inches?
No You Didn't
The fact that the comeback came from a full at Doctor, bless his heart 🤣
Master Counter-Heckler Dolly Parton
I’m Not Sure If This Is The Appropriate Subreddit
Yeah, and, umm....not too smart a doctor to get coughed on all night & then go in to treat clinic patients (assuming she didn't use PPE with her little kid, bc who does?)
Who Needs Kids Anyway
KIDS ARE OPTIONAL. YOU DONT HAVE TO HAVE KIDS BY A CERTAIN AGE, or AT ALL! Just sayin 😊
They Haven't Looked At Anyone
And Then He Blocked Me
They Got Nowhere To Be
Sometimes I wish I could push a button and "Move B***h" by Ludacris would play.
Ink Is Expensive
This Is How Detached The Rich Are From Reality
Is this Peter dude actually serious? “Oh I know they are in the midst of a war and thousands of people are dying. But can the president not wear a suit?” What an actual insensitive a*****e
Clever And True
I would like all of them to be safely out of the closet by adulthood. I was (M) married to a closeted lesbian and two sisters of my best friends (F) were married to closeted gay men. Years later, we're all okay, but seriously, if this wasn't so f'd up, we'd all have had probably better and more loving lives. That's 6 of us just in this one paragraph.
That's Gotta Hurt
Video games aren’t age restricted. (Except for the 13+ stuff ya know. )
But I Need A Vaccine
The simple idea of "prevention is better than cure" goes over the heads of these people.
Premature Celebration?
Noticing Their Grammatical Errors When Someone Question Someone Your Intelligence = Priceless
Love the unspoken slight where MTG correctly addresses AOC as Congresswoman & AOC answers "Mrs. Greene " 😆
Now That's A Damage
The Only Comeback This Pettiness Deserves
Poor Darren ?
Owned, Every Single Time
matt gaetz is a dumb idiot, this is like the people who took stills of dan radcliffe playing a skinhead in a movie and tried to make people think he's ACTUALLY a skinhead
It Is Forbidden To Kill; Therefore All Murderers Are Punished Unless They Kill In Large Numbers And To The Sound Of Trumpets - Voltaire
These were hilarious! But the posts about gay people were annoying since for some bizarre reason, they completely singled out men, as though they think lesbians don't exist or something. 🙄
A common cold is a rhinovirus. Totally different thing. And there's nothing "leftist" about public health precautions. But apart from that, you barely sound like a cretin at all.
Load More Replies...It's right after the incredibly long list of Americans who use the word "liberals" without having the faintest idea what it means.
Load More Replies...These were hilarious! But the posts about gay people were annoying since for some bizarre reason, they completely singled out men, as though they think lesbians don't exist or something. 🙄
A common cold is a rhinovirus. Totally different thing. And there's nothing "leftist" about public health precautions. But apart from that, you barely sound like a cretin at all.
Load More Replies...It's right after the incredibly long list of Americans who use the word "liberals" without having the faintest idea what it means.
Load More Replies...