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40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online

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Creating a glowing customer experience is something that every business strives for. Yet, if you ever worked in the service industry, you know it’s a hard task. Meeting dozens of people every day and dealing with their irrational and senseless demands while still keeping a smile on your face can certainly test your limits.

Sure, not every person you encounter on the job is dumb, some are very understanding of your position. But when a customer makes a complete fool of themselves in front of you, it sure does make a great story. That’s why many client-facing employees came to r/AskReddit to share their experiences.

Bored Panda has collected the most unbelievable answers from several viral threads, so grab a seat and get ready for some genuine laughs! Also, don’t forget to check out our previous posts about bizarre and silly things that came out of customers’ mouths right here and here.

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online The ice dispenser broke at the fast food joint I used to work at. As a temporary fix while we waited for the repair guy to come take a look at it, we set out a giant serving bowl full of ice with tongs, so people could still ice their drinks. About 10 minutes after putting out the ice bowl, a customer comes up to me to complain that the machine isn't dispensing ice.

I tell him, "We know. A repair guy was called, but he's not here yet. In the meantime, there's a bowl next to the soda fountain, so you can still get ice."

The guy immediately gets an attitude about it. "How do I know that ice hasn't been sitting out there all day?"

I stare at him for a good few seconds before saying, "Because it's still solid."

"..."

"If left out at room temperature 'old ice' would just be water."

"I want to speak with your manager."

CentSG2 , flickr Report

Final score:

431points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

Haahaha blame someone else for your stupidity (or brain fart) and ask for the manager.

105points

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#2

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I worked at Borders Books and a lady at the info desk asked where are our BBQ's. When I told her we don't carry BBQ's she got very angry and said, "well you carry books on them, right? Why wouldn't you have them in stock?" I replied, "We have books on nuclear weapons but I don't keep those in stock either." I was written up later that day. B*tch...

bad__movie__fan , pexels Report

Final score:

377points

Buren 2 years ago

Wait until she reads about dragons in the book...

167points

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We reached out to user monieo who asked fellow members or the r/AskReddit community to share the dumbest thing a customer has said to them. They told Bored Panda that they previously worked in retail themselves.

Apparently, as a staff member, you really do get “the cream of the crop” when it comes to the variety of clients that walk through the door.

“It really isn’t a proper workday unless you get some very ignorant or rude customers,” they said. It seems that many people believe that retail staff will do anything they ask and will bend over backwards to fulfill their every need.

#3

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Not to me but I saw it happen to my coworker. I work at a fairly nice restaurant as a server. As with any restaurant we get cheap people who want things for free.

Couple comes in. Busy Friday night. They were sat at a table that had just been cleaned. They sit down, coworker comes out to say his greet. Before he gets a word out the guest begins flipping out. How dare they sit her at a dirty table. My friend has to actually move around the table to see a smudge from the light reflecting off it.

Woman is now irate that he offered to clean it instead of giving them a free appetizer.

She looks at him, 7pm on a Friday rush and says, "if you do not give us our entire meal for free, including alcohol, we're leaving." Keep in mind they haven't even ordered a beverage yet.

Coworker looks at them and says "then leave."

They then try to backtrack and say they want to see a manager. My friend said "no. Get out." And they left.

My friend has worked there for 10 years. Went right to the managers and told them, I backed up his story, we laughed

janedoughpanty , pexels Report

Final score:

344points

Monday 2 years ago

Who wants to bet they would have found something wrong with their food and demanded more freebies if they had been served?

172points

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#4

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online 'Would you like some jalapeños with your nachos?' 'No, I'm massively allergic. I could die.' 'Oh, then you shouldn't have any of this then, the cheese and salsa dips you asked for both contain jalapeños' 'Oh; don't worry. I'm not actually allergic. Just not a fan'.

You f*cking thundering bag of d*cks, I wasn't going to force them down your throat. Say 'no thanks' and we're done.

Greywalker22 , pexels Report

Final score:

342points

Luther von Wolfen 2 years ago

I was a cook. We got a lot of "I'm allergic to lettuce" and other such. Just say you don't want it.

125points

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“A lot of the time, they don’t realize you’ll probably make fun of them behind their backs with your co-workers due to some of the most absurd requests or conversations. Retail staff is bored and the customers give light entertainment to fill in the gaps,” they revealed.

Yet, monieo added that dealing with irrational customers and their demands is seriously challenging. They said that “customers don’t actually believe you’re a living breathing person with feelings and having them yell or abuse you willy-nilly for the hell of it can really wear you down after a while.”

#5

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Used to do tech support for Verizon and a lady called in yelling at me for shutting down her wifi.

Asked for her account info - she doesn't have an account.

Asked her why she called us then and she described the screen that shows up when you don't pay your bill.

She continued to adamantly claim she has no Verizon account and it is illegal for us to shut down her wifi because we don't own the air.

Finally helped her log into her router to get some info and pulled up an account with a different name on it.

She recognizes that name as her neighbor.

Spent the next while trying to get her to understand that she'd been using her neighbor's connection but the neighbor didn't pay the bill so there was nothing I could do. (probably not supposed to discuss the neighbor's billing issue without permission but I'd already told her that screen was from unpaid bills before we figured out it was her neighbor)

Don't think I ever got her to stop telling me I was violating her rights by not allowing her to use the WiFi in her own home...

That call happened to be randomly recorded for QA... My manager, entire team, and multiple training classes thereafter got a good laugh out of it...

amazonian_raider , pexels Report

Final score:

337points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Surely this moron did know she was not paying for wifi? By the way how do I get my neighbor to pay for mine with of course her not knowing?

78points

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#6

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I used to work in a store that sold stuff for getting organized and we carried step ladders for people who might be putting stuff up on high shelves. We had two different models which were completely identical except one had two steps, and the other had three steps. And the larger one cost like $5 more.

One night the store was completely dead when this guy walks in and asks if we have step ladders, so I show him the two choices. He asks all these questions about which one I think is better and whether I recommend one or the other and a bunch of other inane stuff and all I can tell him is that the ONLY difference is the extra step and about $5 in price. So the guy says, "Ok let me think about it for a minute." So I leave him to it.

He ponders this life-altering choice for an hour. He calls his wife to discuss it four times. After endless hemming and hawing he ends up not buying either one, and leaves us with the parting words, "I don't know. I think three steps may just be a little too much ladder for me."

I honestly don't know how someone that indecisive even manages to dress himself in the morning.

Pustuli0 , flickr Report

Final score:

320points

My O My 2 years ago

I feel this guy

66points

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“You also can’t tell them off or what’s really on your mind because you’re the face of the brand so to speak.” The author of this thread revealed that there had been many a time when they wanted to tell people to get lost, to put it mildly.

Monieo told Bored Panda that they primarily worked for a large office supply company. From their own experience, they once had an elderly customer come through the door and make a beeline for them at the register. The person demanded that they tell their colleague to “stop texting their friends and get back to work.”

#7

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Ran a lawn mowing service. New customer asks about the process.

"Do you come to my house to mow it?"

No. We pick it up and haul it to our special mowing center then bring it back.

RichardStrauss123 , flickr Report

Final score:

314points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

Haaahaha. Good sarcasm !

69points

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#8

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Gas station.

"Hey, the bathroom door is locked. Can I get a key?"

"There's no key, if it's locked there's someone in there"

"How does it know?"

"How does... what... know... what?"

"How does the bathroom know someone is in there?"

"People.... people go in and then they lock the door while they're using it."

[5 second pause]

"Ohhhh"

SenorBeef , unsplash Report

Final score:

313points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

Long drive?

116points

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“My co-worker was using a digital product gun checking stock,” the author explained. “It clearly wasn’t a phone, nor looked like one. Even after I explained to the customer, she said I was a ‘very stupid girl’ and told me she’d never buy here again. My co-worker and I found it absolutely hilarious and talked about it all day.”

On a final note, the user told us that they certainly don’t miss working in retail: “In fact, I quit as soon as I graduated university. But the bizarre customer interactions sure make me look fondly back on it.”

#9

I once had someone complain that the self-checkout machine was being racist because it was giving her the usual errors and warnings.

"please place the item in the bagging area! please remove item from the bagging area! The bagging weight is not correct. The attendant has been notified and will assist you."

(It's not racist, for the record; it hates all humans equally.)

Paksarra Report

Final score:

298points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

Sometimes people use that nasty word for no reason al all.

99points

PattonPawter 2 years ago

Especially with the argument that “oh you (did/said something that doesn’t have to do with my race/gender/sexuality/etc) so you’re being (racist/sexist/homophobic/etc).

24points

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cb !!! 2 years ago

there was a kid in high school that used to call me racist because i wouldn't give him a fist bump. we were the same race, so i asked him what he meant. apparently, because he had red hair and i didn't, i was being "ginger racist".

12points

SoozeeQ 2 years ago

I think that sometimes, they get confused between "racism and "discrimination".

8points

Lawrencium 2 years ago

That's such a racist thing to say! I have no idea who you are and have no way of knowing your race, gender, political preferences, etc... but I am 100% sure you said that out of HATE towards me (and any group I might identify with) specifically! How dare you!

3points

Blarrg 2 years ago

No, there's a reason. No one wants to be considered a racist, and some have found that throwing the word around can make their argument more influential.

0points

Living Example 2 years ago

To me they are less convenient and taking away jobs.

12points

Potato 2 years ago

I think they have a purpose. I prefer self-checkout because of social anxiety issues, and they only are for 10 items or fewer where I live. So most people still require regular cashiers, and self-checkout still requires humans for regulation and maintenance.

10points

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Izzy Curer 2 years ago

I hate it when those things talk.

9points

Id row 2 years ago

I hate race card gunslingers.

5points

Robert T 2 years ago (edited)

Some of these machines are so bad, that it makes me embarassed to admit that I work in IT! (They are nothing to do with me, honest!)

5points

Candy corn 2 years ago

Oh I hate those machines

4points

Vicky Z 2 years ago

I have a lot in common with this machine

3points

Carole Reid 2 years ago

Never use them. They are a pain in the A--.

2points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Indead

1point

Jessany Trotter 2 years ago

Caucasian. Can confirm!

0points

Stephen Taylor 2 years ago

I actually overheard a younger black person state recently, that they thought the Kleenex on sale on the store shelf was racist because it was white. I was tempted to inject myself into the convo and ask if that applies to toilet paper too…but thought better of it.

0points

Nicole Trombly 2 years ago

I worked at a convenience store and I had a lady say our store was racist because we had black plastic bags. She was a very beautiful black woman and said that since we have black bags we are making white people feel unwelcome….20 years later and I still ponder this!

0points

Didon Zenith 2 years ago

There's a store chain in my area that uses a kind like this one except every single one of those machines do that and they will require employees codes for every single item cause their scales can't register most items (seems to be like they are calibrated for bigger, heavier items when they mostly sell small and light ones) and the poor employee stationed in front of them seems to spend their entire shift going from one to another, getting cursed out by customers who are mad that buying a two dollars item takes ten minutes instead of like five and helping elderly people do their entire transaction because the machines won't work. They used to have them and then at least one cashier, but they used COVID as an excuse to get rid of the cashier part and now they are stuck with a line of people who can't keep distance between them (there's always one woman standing right behind the middle one as if it would make the person trying to use it go faster) and a poor overwhelmed employee who ends up calling for backup so they open one or two cashes.

0points

Pia kjærgaard 2 years ago

BIG Siiiiiiiihhgggh!!!!!!!🙈

0points

Eric Soliday 2 years ago

Better bring that machine to the court room and explain herself

0points

Pamela Blue 2 years ago

I'm getting tired of that racist card. It's now so overused that it means absolutely nothing.

0points

Daniel Atkins 2 years ago

Ahh yes I remember when Wal-Mart self checkout thought uncooked bacon was fragile.

0points

Roxy Eastland 2 years ago

Some automated services don't pick up on dark skin, such as some motion triggered taps in public toilets, so this isn't completely batty.

0points

Valley Girl 2 years ago

I hate people like this. I think I take too much crap just because I don't want to be that person who cries wolf all the time.

0points

John L 2 years ago

Yeah, but I really hate it when the machine says "dummy". That's not right!

0points

Vasana Phong 2 years ago

Some self checkout registers are very sensitive that’s all

0points

Enby.Minecraft.Bee. 2 years ago

I could relate to the machine

0points

S 2 years ago

The very first thing I do when I'm at a self checkout is mute that damn voice.

0points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

A machine I would really like to get to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!

0points

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#10

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online "Does this room go all the way to the back wall over there?"

She pointed a finger out towards the end of the shop-floor, past all the shelves and merchandise.

"That white wall? The one furthest away at the end of the room? Yes."

"That is part of the room too?"

"Yes, this room contains all of itself."

"Thank you."

".... what the f*ck just happened?"

ParrotChild , pexels Report

Final score:

284points

Timea Peter 2 years ago

weed

127points

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#11

Working at callcenter, asking people to pay their old bills. Naturally some responded angrily.

'So this is what you do all day? You just call people who haven't paid their bills?'

'Yes.'

'So if I paid my bills you'd be out of the job?'

'If everybody paid their bills, then yes.'

'Ha ha! Good. You just f*cked up by telling me this. I'm going to pay my bills right away. When you're unemployed then see how you like getting calls about your bills!'

The futility of eradicating a job that relies on the existence of poor people by making me poor escaped them.

Lon-Abel-Kelly Report

Final score:

272points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Be proud honey, you got this veggie brain to pay her bills good job! Maybe you could use this as a bill paying tactic!

7points

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#12

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I work at an Italian place right now. We call our Italian menu items by Italian names with English descriptions. I get a lot of questions, but I don't mind a hair because I get paid to talk about food.

Not too long ago though it sort of went slapstick. It's not that they asked a dumb question, but they kept asking it. "Pollo e penne?" "Oh, that's chicken and pasta with..." "Does it have meat in it?" "The chicken pasta? Yes, pollo is Italian for chicken." "Can I get the chicken but not the pollo?" "Pollo is just Italian for chicken, if you want chicken it's really good..." "No, I like chicken but I don't want pollo." I kind of lost it for a split second.

trebuchetfight , unsplash Report

Final score:

271points

Martha Meyer 2 years ago

It's a good thing ths person never needed to learn a second language. Because they would have died.

133points

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#13

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online "My laptop won't turn on!"

"Did you plug it in and charge the battery?"

"NO! This is a laptop! It doesn't need to be plugged in!"

"Ma'am, the battery still needs to be charg..."

"LISTEN! This is a laptop!"

Garvilan , pexels Report

Final score:

267points

Pearl 2 years ago

Where do such stupid peoples get the money to buy a device? WHAT the heck do they think the use of the wire that came with the laptop is? Do they even read the instructions? Where do they live?

129points

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#14

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I used to work at Red Lobster. A lady asked me for suggestions on something healthy. I suggested grilled salmon. She promptly turned down the idea, saying she heard it was full of fat. She then ordered a fried seafood platter with double butter and sour cream for her baked potato and double ranch dressing for her salad.

jennsatterfield83 , unsplash Report

Final score:

259points

Buren 2 years ago

And a diet coke I suppose?

192points

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#15

I had this insane woman flag me down at a Chinese Restaurant I used to manage.

She very loudly told me she found a hair in her Mongolian lamb, and showed me a long sauce covered blonde hair. For reference, I had short black hair at the time and the entire kitchen and wait staff on that night had relatively short black hair. The woman had long blonde hair.

Instead of letting her cause more of a scene, I apologised and got the kitchen to make her a new serving to replace the meal (even though she and her kids had essentially eaten the entire serving already.)

The part where sh*t started to really go down was when she came up with her family to pay. She refused to pay her ENTIRE bill due to the "HUGE THICK HAIR I FOUND IN MY FOOD" which she loudly announced to the room. At this point, the restaurant owner came out and started having a screaming match with the woman for trying to rip us off. Her kids appeared to cry on cue.

I sent my boss back to the kitchen and said I would figure it out. I turned to the woman and explained calmly that I would be happy to take the Mongolian Lamb off of her tally (despite the replacement serving) so long as she paid the other $90+ for the rest of the bill.

She refused and called the cops because my boss had yelled at her. No joke.

Best bit was the cops ended up telling the woman she needs to pay her full bill and that emergency services shouldn't be called for such petty reasons.

Happy I'm not in that industry anymore haha...

TLDR; Lady tries to use her own hair to get out of paying for her table's food. Aussie Cops provide quality sass.

ness_davis Report

Final score:

249points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Excellent story but the kids probably weren't crying on queue mom probably does this to them all the time. Can you imagine I'd be so GD embarrassed!

103points

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#16

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Worked at a gas station. I watched a customer pull up, whip her door open and slam it against the large, shiny silver pole that protects cars form running into gas pumps. She then proceeds to furiously get out, scream with her head facing the heavens, and run into the gas station telling me I need to be more careful where I place those.

The thing has been cemented into the f*cking ground for over twenty years.

Freakawn , flickr Report

Final score:

246points

Blue Purple 2 years ago

You obviously should have placed them more carefully 20 years ago then

102points

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#17

Used to work at Starbucks. A lady ordered a mocha and I forgot to add the mocha syrup. Dumb mistake so I fixed it of course. She put it back on the bar a couple minutes later and said "It doesn't taste right, I want a new one." Okaaay I thought, dont know what else I can do, but sure ill make a new one. I get started on it and she goes to the restroom. She gets back from the restroom before I'm done making it but sees her old drink on the bar that I hadn't taken back yet and thinks its her new one. She looks at and says "ah, it looks better already!", takes a big drink and says "Now see, that's perfect" then leaves before I can tell her I didn't do a damned thing.

I_hate_whales Report

Final score:

238points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

See everything's better after a good wee!

147points

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#18

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I work at a hotel and I had a guest/customer call and inform me that his room did not have a bathroom and that he would need to be moved to one which did. I informed him of course that all of our rooms have bathrooms, and asked if he had checked the doors in the room. He had not..

RepletesMaryJane , unsplash Report

Final score:

231points

Meyrin 2 years ago

Now I understand the hotel rooms with big windows to the bathroom/toilet

96points

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#19

Worked at Burger King, had a really busy rush, line all the way to the door. This guy comes in and gets in line, real sh*tty look on his face. He waits in line for about 5-10 minutes (anger building), gets up to my register and screams while waving a Taco Bell bag at me " You forgot my sour cream"

I was dumbfounded at how the guy could have waited in line, with all the pictures of burgers every where, and the completely different color scheme. So I told him I would go get my manager (she was a real old and crankier kind of lady, rough around the edges.)

As I come back I can see the guy has this odd look on his face, like its starting to sink in, my manager comes up and I tell her " We forgot the sour cream for his tacos". She looks at me, rolls her eyes harder than I have ever seen anyone roll their eyes, and turns around and walks back to her office.

The guy looks at me, he is starting to look nervous, his brain knows something is wrong.. I point out the window, he looks out the window, sees the Taco Bell next door. He was out the front door fast, bright red, not a word.

nonaestet Report

Final score:

222points

Guido Pisano 2 years ago

...at least didnt said it was YOUR fault for not being taco bell...

95points

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#20

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online As a UPS driver

Customer: what's in the package?

Me: no idea you ordered it

Bayarearedneck , pexels Report

Final score:

217points

Adam C 2 years ago

As a former Fedex driver: Some broken stuff.

106points

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#21

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online C: Can I keep these indoor plants outside?

M: Well, they are tropical plants and we live in Canada so they would be fine for the summer, but you would need to bring them inside during fall and winter.

C: Ok, but what will happen if I just leave them outside for winter?

M: ...They will die.

C: Ok, but what can I do to keep them alive?

M: ...

puriance , pexels Report

Final score:

215points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

Leave them in the shop

183points

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#22

I worked at REI a few years back (large outdoor sporting goods co-op, just in case you haven't heard of it), and we sold bear spray (pepper spray for bears). A woman came in with her two kids one day and bought a canister because they were going camping. She gets to the front door, then comes back to the register as an afterthought, and asks if she's supposed to just spray her kids from head to toe with it.

Final score:

207points

Meyrin 2 years ago

good thing she did

124points

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#23

I once managed the front desk of a recreational center, and this one parent yelled at me for a class starting without their kid.

They were 15 minutes late.

I hate parents...

[deleted] Report

Final score:

205points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Top the anger off by telling her there is a late fee! Watch the fireworks!

75points

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#24

Library. Once I checked out several books to a woman and told her the return date. She looked at her friend, then back at me, and said, shocked, "You mean I have to bring the books BACK?"

twentyfeettall Report

Final score:

204points

Gaby Almodovar 2 years ago

How these kind of people are still alive? Better question! How their ancestors managed to be alive enough time for procreation in the stone-age?

87points

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#25

Customer: "$11.50?!? The deal says any two footlong sandwiches for $12!"

Me: "Yes, but one of the sandwiches you got had a regular price of $5.50 so it was cheaper any--"

Customer: "Thats ridiculous!! I want to see a manager- actually forget it. I'm never coming back!"

greywolf248 Report

Final score:

202points

Buren 2 years ago

They probably escape from the math class

78points

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#26

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Worked in a scooter repair shop. This customer was well known for being beyond stupid, every time we saw them.

This time, she had lost her keys. She had us pick up the scooter, cut her a new key, and came in to pick it up.

Walks in, pays, goes outside to drive home. Walks back inside.

Customer: “um, when I dropped my bike off, there were like.. a lot more keys on here..” holds up key ring

Coworker: “you had us pick up you scooter... because you lost. Your. Keys.”

Customer: eyes go wide after several seconds of confusion “oooohhhhhh thaaatsriiiigghht......!!”

we all stare at each other as she leaves, wondering how she functions in society

Ninja_rooster , flickr Report

Final score:

198points

Troux 2 years ago

For the sake of everyone around her, I'm glad she's on a scooter and not in a car or truck.

77points

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#27

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I made lentil soup for the kitchen I worked in as a teen, but I put the carrots in later than I should have and so they still had a slight crunch when the first customer bought a cup. He stormed back in after a few minutes and demanded his money back because he was going to get food poisoning from eating an uncooked carrot.

[deleted] , flickr Report

Final score:

192points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Well look what some underdone bit of potato did the Scrooge

79points

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#28

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online C:"Your computer you sent me is broken, fix it!"

M: "We don't provide computers to anyone, this is (company name)."

C: "I got a computer from you guys to use for school 2 weeks ago. Give me a new one NOW."

M: "Where did you get it from?"

C: "YOU"

M: "What was the company name?"

C: "My god you are so annoying. I got it from (Different Company Name)."

M: "You'll want to contact them. This is (Company Name) and we don't provide computers."

C: Brief silence. "THIS IS YOUR FAULT." Hangs up

One of the dumbest calls I have ever had. Was a few years ago and glad I don't deal with those kind of people anymore.

blade55555 , pexels Report

Final score:

188points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Maybe its a good thing he wanted the computer for school -I assume reading is not his strong suit!

48points

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#29

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online "Your total comes to $32.23"

"I only have $20."

"...."

"Can I still have it?"

"....no."

Closer-To-The-Sun , unsplash Report

Final score:

183points

Pearl 2 years ago

Don't worry the tooth fairy will give you the money

42points

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#30

Vet tech. A lot of people think their dog's nipples are ticks. A lot. One man even pulled a "but he's a boy!" on us.

JunkyardForLove Report

Final score:

182points

Wendy Franck 2 years ago

My MIL tried to remove the "ticks" from my cat, and the little idiot was just lying there, letting her pull his nipples.

135points

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#31

A woman came into my restaurant clearly looking for her friends who were already sitting down.

The restaurant is small, and you can see every seat from the front door. I hand her a menu, and say: "Go ahead and take a look for them - they've gotta be here somewhere."

She looks at me, then down at the menu she holds in her hands with what can only be described as a look of both fear and confusion. I ask her if there's anything the matter, to which she responds: "How do you have a map of where everyone is sitting???"

She thought we live-printed maps every time someone new came through the doors.

Bonus: She, later that same night, asked me what duck was.

canadianpaleale Report

Final score:

166points

KJ 2 years ago

Swimming chicken.

150points

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#32

C1: "I'm allergic to anchovies, so no anchovies on my Caesar salad."

there's anchovies in our caesar dressing, what would you like instead?

C1: No there's not, I had it last week and I didn't taste them.

I grind anchovies into that dressing Every. Single. Day.

WesbroBaptstBarNGril Report

Final score:

163points

Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

I'll take his share!

31points

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#33

In New York State, you have to have your car inspected for safety. If it's not safe, you can't drive it. I failed a woman's car because her brake pedal goes to the floor, and the car barely stops. She LOSES her sh*t, calls her husband who b*tches me out.

"You don't know who I know, I'll have your job by the end of the month!" etc.

After about 20 minutes of arguing, the lady calms down and accepts her fate. The conversation goes as follows.

Her: "Are the brakes something the collision shop would check after an accident?"

Me: "Sure, but it depends on where the damage was."

Her: "Hmm, okay. I just got my car back, and they didn't say anything. I crashed into a building because the brakes didn't work."

Me: "Huh, weird."

Final score:

161points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Tip, auto mechanics have a lot to do and won't check every inch of your car for free. That little computer is not a tell-all it doesn't just say everything that's wrong with the car it just directs the mechanic to the right spot. So make sure you tell the mechanic what you want them to check.

48points

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#34

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Had an argument with a customer that there is no such thing as a uppercase "5". So when he was typing in his email password, he was typing a "%" in his password instead of a "5".

devildunkard , pexels Report

Final score:

156points

Caro Caro 2 years ago (edited)

Me to my mum patiently: "No you leave the mouse on the table. No, just gently move it. Leave it on the table. OK, now when you gently move it do you see a little arrow moving on your screen? No gently mum, very very slowly.... What? No, leave the mouse on the table. Shall I log in and pay the bill for you. Love you too." :D

131points

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#35

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online When the Nintendo DS was released with the Brain Training games we had several middle aged and older customers come in to buy the game but didn't own the Nintendo DS "No I don't want the Nintendo thing I just want the game." I started asking "What colour DS do you have?" to find out

After confirming she didn't own a DS, one lady told me "I used to work in sales, I know you're trying to upsell, it's not going to work."

Most of the time they thought they could put it in their computer somewhere or ask their children for help.

phattoes , flickr Report

Final score:

152points

My O My 2 years ago

Poor children

54points

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#36

I used to work as a bank teller. A lady came up to me and asked to withdraw money. I informed her that she couldn't withdraw money, because her account was overdrawn. She was immediately upset, so I had her account checked for fraud. She then explained that all those charges were hers and she wasn't expecting any payments. She was spending money she knew she didn't have.

She then asked me why we couldn't just give her more money.

OMothmanWhereArtThou Report

Final score:

152points

Buren 2 years ago

Actually.. yes, can you just give me money too?

61points

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#37

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online Worked at a PF Chang's and had a guest order the hot and sour soup. She sent it back because it tasted sour. And just the other day best friend who works at a fried chicken place had somebody complain about being charged for extra sauce. My friend told him that it says clearly on the menu extra sauce costs extra and the guy angrily says "I shouldn't have to read the menu!"

[deleted] , flickr Report

Final score:

151points

kaycee14 2 years ago

Every customer-facing worker ever has heard "I shouldn't have to read the sign." I've always wanted to reply, "no, but it would save you from looking stupid."

70points

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#38

Back when I did tech support, I received a call from a customer with a peculiar keyboard problem. It seems that he was having trouble with the shift key. When he typed a letter with the shift key pressed it gave him the upper case letter, but when he typed a number, it didn't do that. Didn't do what? Type the upper case number. I had to break it to him gently.

donut2099 Report

Final score:

151points

Caro Caro 2 years ago

I once asked for a copy of the floppydisk (yes I'm that old) and she sent me a xerox :D

54points

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#39

Someone once told me she can’t have eggs since she was lactose intolerant. I told her to not worry’s since there was no dairy in the dish but I can still do it without eggs. Her response “Did you not just hear me say I can’t have dairy?”

This was an old grumpy lady who seems to think eggs, or anything from what we think of as “farms”, are dairy. So no, the customer is not always right.

ryanmuller1089 Report

Final score:

151points

BAN CAPITAL LETTERS 2 years ago

"the customer is always right, IN MATTERS OF TASTE"

86points

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#40

I went to dinner once at a Chinese restaurant in Missouri and a woman at the table next to ours yelled at the waiter, "Where is the other sauce? We are supposed to get Sweet and Sour Sauce and we only got one sauce!"

DeniseDeNephew Report

Final score:

135points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Its a twofer idiot!

26points

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#41

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online "Yes, I understand I haven't paid my credit card bill in 3 months. But why can't I use my card?" "Because you haven't paid your bill in 3 months." repeat

nolooselips , pexels Report

Final score:

73points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Credit is so very hard to explain to a turnip!

20points

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#42

Working at a small coffee shop that roasted their own beans/had their own brand. "Do you sell Starbucks here?" "No ma'am we roast our own coffee." "Well that's just bad business!" ... okay.

NoDoThis Report

Final score:

57points

KJ 2 years ago

It would probably have blown their mind to have a proper cup of coffee.

8points

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#43

Customer screaming: "MY NEW CAR'S BACK WIPER DOESN'T WORK!!!"

we walk outside, look at back window

Me: you don't have a back wiper blade.

Proxy12345 Report

Final score:

57points

Buren 2 years ago

WELL NO WONDER IT DOESN'T WORK!

27points

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#44

"HEY I asked for light lettuce!"

"Oh sorry." remakes sandwich "Here you go."

"...I don't get all the rest of my order for free?"

"What? No."

She ordered for herself, her mom and two sisters. She was honestly shocked she wasn't getting 4 full meals free from a small mistake.

[deleted] Report

Final score:

57points

JuJu 2 years ago

Can somebody explain "light lettuce", please...

28points

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#45

Working at a chain restaurant, you never know what kind of things are going to come out of people's mouths. I once had a lady that literally said to me, after trying her food, "this doesn't taste like the picture.".

dictatordonkey Report

Final score:

56points

Buren 2 years ago

Well duh

14points

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#46

I had a woman yell at me, questioning why i had kicked her daughter out of the hot tub, i had to then explain to her, i had caught her daughter having sex with her bf. She just wont have any of it, "MY DAUGHTER IS A GOOD CHRISTIAN GIRL" at this point the whole building is watching her and my manager comes over and offers to let her watch the security footage of her daughter. Well she wouldn't have any of that and just stormed off.

Daggerwoods Report

Final score:

55points

Bec Jac 2 years ago

I worked in a condo and when new people moved in I did the tour. I would always tell them there is a camera over the hot tub and you shouldn't do anything you wouldn't want anyone to see in it because we go over the tapes and if we see anything good we post it to youtube (just trying to be funny). It did not deter many people...we saw it all and then some!

4points

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#47

A guy accused me of harassing him because I kicked him out of the store after the third time he stole from us. He then called the cops...

Merry_Bastard Report

Final score:

52points

Jayne Kyra 2 years ago

From the 8-year old Reddit post when OP was asked if the man got arrested: "He did not. We didn't press any charges (it was a really small worth). The shitty thing is, my manager was so worried that we would get in trouble with higher ups that he let the guy back in."

3points

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#48

When I worked at a bank I had a customer come into the branch angry because his account was overdrawn. I looked at the account and noticed several checks had gone through so I told the customer who got even madder because how could his account be overdrawn when he still has blank checks in his checkbook.

Dude truly believed that checks were like cash.

dustbunnee Report

Final score:

51points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Yahoo! I gotta try that!

11points

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#49

Working as a tech support manager for a dial-up ISP in the mid-1990s. A customer called to ask why his email wasn't working, and made me stay on the phone with him while he walked through it to prove it.

Lo and behold it didn't work. He wasn't online. Why? He was talking to me on his one phone line. All the other times his email didn't work before, he had also been talking on the phone.

CrazyOtto87 Report

Final score:

50points

Nannis Goatis 2 years ago

A lot of today's kids won't get his, but call my generation stupid.

32points

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#50

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I work at a newspaper...and we accept payments for subscription over the phone.

This woman (older lady...probably 70+), after giving me her details so I can find her information and pull her account up, says she wants to make a payment by card.

I enter the information once, but the page refreshes on my computer and wipes the info. I then tell her "Could you repeat your card number please? My computer erased it for some reason"

She replies with "You're entering this on a computer?" Long pause. "Never mind I don't trust computers." She then hangs up the phone.

Like...do you think your card is magic orrrr........?

Unho1yIntent , pexels Report

Final score:

49points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

U never know what skynet plans to do with ur information

11points

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#51

Cellphone store right before the dawn of the smartphone

Customer: “I need my information off my old phone.”

Me: “Okay where is it?”

Customer: “At the bottom of a lake.”

sunghooter Report

Final score:

48points

Sawdust 2 years ago

And then the customer invented Cloud storage, making millions.

30points

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#52

Retail, anytime a customer didn't agree with a policy.

"But I'm a good paying customer!"

All of our customers are paying customers. If you do this, stop.

Final score:

48points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

But are all customers good? Guess you gotta be the judge!

6points

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#53

Long time ago now...
Got a call that a user's laptop was dead and wouldn't power on.
I go and check it out. Press the button, no life. Plug it into the power, it starts charging. Press the button, it boots just fine.
The user wasn't plugging the laptop into power because she "thought we had wireless".

HouseCravenRaw Report

Final score:

48points

Nathan Pogorzala 2 years ago

Tesla? is that you?

7points

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#54

I worked at Victoria's Secret and a customer came in to return her wedding lingerie. She said she "only wore it once".

There were markings in the panty area and an empty condom wrapper in the bag.

PotatoMuffinMafia Report

Final score:

48points

Crystal Barkhauer 2 years ago

Eww…just eww…I hope the person didn’t have to refund. 🤢

31points

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#55

I work at a rite aid. Just had a guy come in about an hour ago. Asked me "y'all sell weed?". So I tell him no. So he responds with, "This is a drug store and you don't sell drugs?". Probably high off his a*s though

silentz0mbie Report

Final score:

46points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Reasonable question in certain states.

18points

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#56

A woman bought a white shirt. She then spilled red soda onto the shirt. To fix the stain she used a tide-to-go pen. She rubbed so hard it tore a hole in the fabric. Her husband tried to return it after they stained and tore the garment claiming that it must have been a manufacturing problem. No. Sir. That's not how it works.

CeleryKale Report

Final score:

46points

H Edwards 2 years ago

The sad thing is, I've read similar stories where the manager actually ended up replacing the item for free.

19points

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#57

I worked at a Toyota dealership and a salesman said his customer asked to speak to the manager because Jesus told her that we would provide her with a car. I asked her if Jesus was paying cash or financing. She literally expected us to just go, "Oh ok, well...pick out whatever tickles your fancy!"

UncleCornPone Report

Final score:

46points

David Martin 2 years ago

Jesus would never send anybody to a Toyota dealership for a free car...he would send them to get a Jesus Chrysler

86points

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#58

Me: hi, welcome to little caesars!

Them: hey. How much does your $5 pizza cost?

Me: yes.

AlchemicalEnthusiast Report

Final score:

46points

Monday 2 years ago

A fair question if this was in the US, since tax is never included in the display price.

21points

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Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

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#59

A customer walks into our tiny bike shop jammed packed full of bikes. Bikes are hanging in the window, off the ceiling on the walls, all over the floor. There is not a square foot of space in the shop that is not occupied by a bike or various parts of one.

"This is the bike shop right?"

Yes.

"Do you guys sell bikes or fix them?"

Both.

"If I brought my canoe in could you fix it?"

Is canoe the name of your bike or is it a boat?"

"It's just a canoe for the lake. Do you guys fix them?"

What? No, we're a bike shop.

"Oh."

Fink_Kedat Report

Final score:

45points

jammer 2 years ago

”But, you have like, tools and s#it, no?”

15points

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#60

When I was a grocery store cashier: "Why the f*ck didn't you remind me about my coupons before I checked out! The self-checkout always does, so that's your job." They then told my manager that they wanted all the savings to come out of my paycheck even though they were able to apply the discount retroactively and credit her credit card at customer service.

At my NetSec job, after a client fell for a very obvious phishing e-mail, in the middle of the night, and transferred over $100K to a foreign bank account: "Don't we hire you to prevent this bullsh*t! Shouldn't you have kept that e-mail from showing up in my mailbox!" - Yeah, no. Unfortunately we haven't come up with a software solution to staggering stupidity.

RealityIsMyReligion Report

Final score:

45points

Oopsydaisy 2 years ago

How do people that stupid have that much money? That's offensive.

29points

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#61

Worked at chick fil a, and a customer pointed to our lemonade dispenser. On it, it says “lemon, sugar, water.” The customer asks for a lemon, sugar, water drink. I repeat back “a lemonade?” His reply: “no, the lemon sugar water drink.”

Also people can’t say Polynesian sauce for all that is good and holy in this world. I’ve heard polyester sauce and Pomeranian sauce.

Alyssajprez Report

Final score:

44points

LB 2 years ago

I used to work at a place that sold Fruitopia when it was still widely available in the US. And I heard many interesting pronunciations. My favorite was fruitomatopoeia. Like onomatopoeia, but replace the first syllable with fruit.

11points

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#62

I worked at Subway when I was 16. A customer asked me the difference between the turkey and ham. I told her the ham was made from pigs and the turkey was made from turkey. She did not like my answer.

AliceInPieces Report

Final score:

44points

Thorfin Wolfsbane 2 years ago

This one goes 'oink, oink' and this one goes 'gobble, gobble'!

16points

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#63

A lady came into the store and asked us if we sold "adult toys".

This was Toys "R" Us. We don't sell those here.

rottytops Report

Final score:

44points

Izzy Curer 2 years ago

Ah. Legos, I assume.

32points

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#64

A customer asked me "What's the difference between mashed potatoes and baked potatoes?" My smart a*s response was " well they're both potatoes but one is mashed and one is baked."

ASMBusiness Report

Final score:

44points

jammer 2 years ago

”The potatoes are either mashed or baked, but unlike you, sir, they cannot be both at the same time.”

26points

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#65

Had someone come into our office for a consultation. He was clearly slurring his speech, couldn't stand and reeked of alcohol.

"Sir, have you been drinking."

"No, I don't drink."

"You smell like alcohol and appear drunk."

"I don't drink, I'm just sipping."

ENDofZERO Report

Final score:

43points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

I'm using this

16points

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#66

I worked in inbound sales at a call center once, and we had a customer ask to pay cash over the phone. I thought they were joking and I said "Yeah! Just send it right through your receiver." There was a pause, and then I hear, "No, seriously, how do I pay cash over the phone?"

lurk_nation Report

Final score:

43points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

You gotta have little holes or something on the phone just keep trying cabbage brain!

3points

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

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#67

I worked at Kinkos and on 3 separate occasions different people angrily asked me why I returned their faxed document to them. They thought that a fax machine was some kind of Willy Wonka thing that sent their original piece of paper to the recipient.

jchite84 Report

Final score:

43points

JuJu 2 years ago

Uhm...I have two colleagues in their early 20s and both don't really get how fax works (let's not talk about how to use a fax machine)

8points

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#68

"Man, ya'll don't know how to treat customers. It's why you all losing money. I'm going to Lowe's."

From a customer yelling at customer service, in a Lowe's.

ohitsmark Report

Final score:

42points

kaycee14 2 years ago

I used to cashier at Lowes. SO MANY people were astonished that they couldn't use their Home Depot credit card. No, you don't "always use it here." Because this is Lowes. No, they're not the same store. No, this wasn't Home Depot last month.

25points

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#69

40 Times Customers Said Something So Stupid, It Had To Be Shared Online I work at a hotel, a client walks in: "If I book a room, does it include the bed?" Like no Sir, we only provide you a chair so you can sit down and wait till check out time.

rggrd , pexels Report

Final score:

42points

Sawdust 2 years ago

Hmm, new hotel marketing idea: Cheap "rooms" (furniture extra, a la carte).

22points

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#70

A pleasant lady walked into the bike store I work at and asked us to help take her daughter's bike out of the car to find out why it wasn't riding as well as it had been when she got it. I stride over to her minivan and lug out a beautiful, spotless blue Bianchi. Looked like it had been ridden maybe twice.

Brakes were snappy, shifting was crisp, chain had zero rust and zero stretch. The bike was basically good as new.

Except the tires were empty. I asked her when her daughter filled them last.

"You have to fill them?"

Final score:

42points

Rod Egret 2 years ago

Tires have to be full of air, just like your head....

22points

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#71

Someone once asked me "why are you guys making it so difficult to find a car parking spot this time of year?!" It was Christmas time, and I was a casual working in a tiny store in a huge shopping center. I didn't even know what to say.

Final score:

42points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Why are you bringing a car to a completely occupied lot!

10points

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#72

"Why are you watering down my coffee?" - Guy who ordered an Iced Americano

ricehatwarrior Report

Final score:

41points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

To make it grow you douche canoe!

10points

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#73

I'm a cashier at a grocery store and one time I had a lady ask me of I could "tell everyone else to let her go first." Like, she expected me to force everyone who had been patiently waiting in line to let her cut them. It wasn't like she only had 1 or 2 items either; her cart was packed.

Arii797ros Report

Final score:

41points

KJ 2 years ago

Let her unload her trolley onto the belt, close the line and move to the next free one and start serving the others.

15points

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#74

Worked on a Christmas tree farm over winter break in college. One time I had a lady ask me, "so, what are these trees made out of?"

PM_ME_CRAFT_BEER Report

Final score:

41points

Sawdust 2 years ago

"Fur."

23points

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#75

Lady ordered fries with no salt. She comes back and complains, "there's no salt on my fries."

[deleted] Report

Final score:

41points

jammer 2 years ago

”So sorry mam, here’s your I Can’t Believe It’s Not Salt salt.”

22points

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#76

I once had a woman ask if UK Cosmo was "written in a British accent".

BookerDeWittsCarbine Report

Final score:

40points

Allan Breum 2 years ago

That is actually a sort of valid question, because British English has different spelling of some words than the U.S. versions, not to mention that some people write as if they were talking out loud, so using local slang and other quirks. So, while sounding dumb, its not entirely so... just mostly.

13points

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#77

Used to work at a fast food place. Lady comes through the drive-thru and orders a cheeseburger with no cheese. Me: "Oh, okay, so you would like one hamburger then, ma'am?" Lady (now huffy): "No! I want a cheeseburger with NO CHEESE!" Back then a cheeseburger was $1.00, and a hamburger was 69-ish cents. She's not the only person to have ordered that either. Still baffles me today. (Edit for Clarity) Some people have brought up that at some restaurants the hamburger and cheeseburger get different toppings, are made of different meat, are on special, etc. I probably should have been more clear, so here was the deal at this particular place: The hamburger and cheeseburger got the same bun, had the same burger patties, and got the same toppings (ketchup, mustard, onion and pickle). The only differences besides the price were the cheeseburger had cheese and had a different colored wrapper. Sorry if I confused anyone!

PenumbraVeil Report

Final score:

39points

T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Maybe she really liked the different wrapper.

22points

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#78

Jimmy John's worker here. One time a woman complained that we made her sandwich "much too fast" and refused to eat it.

theparsnips Report

Final score:

39points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

I like a man with a slow hand!

19points

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#79

A Chipotle customer asked for spaghetti noodles on his burrito while pointing to the cheese..

HimynameisFak Report

Final score:

39points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

**whimper**

12points

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#80

-Can you photoshop some pictures for me?

-Sir, this is a bookstore.

-Yeah, but I see you have a computer right here.

Final score:

38points

Thorfin Wolfsbane 2 years ago

I worked at a bookstore and thought it would be great - talking about books with intelligent customers. I was wrong; and got some of the dumbest questions I ever heard.

15points

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#81

While towing his car to a dealership, "So what do you do for a living?"

He was serious. He assumed I had another job because I didn't fit the Billy Bob persona he associated with tow truck drivers.

Final score:

37points

Who Panda 420 2 years ago

Same happened to me kinda down south. I have a new england accent guy couldn't believe he got the right number for an auto garage

8points

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#82

I'm a dog groomer, not a tailor:

"His hair is too short, can you just let the sides out a bit?"

Mattaytoe Report

Final score:

37points

El muerto 2 years ago

glue some hair on, that's it

6points

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#83

"Hey I'm on your website and this item that's on sale says its online only, do you have any in stock in your store?"

"No we don't because it's online only"

"But it's on sale why can't I get it in your store?"

"Because it's online only"

TheyreMineralsMarie1 Report

Final score:

36points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

This could go on forever!

9points

#84

When I asked "For here or to go?" I got a confused look followed by "What would you recommend?"

PhreedomPhighter Report

Final score:

36points

Magoomba 2 years ago

To go.

34points

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#85

I work at a bank inside of a grocery store. The customer was very upset that they couldn't buy their toilet paper and doritos at the teller window.

derdeutschbag Report

Final score:

35points

Sawdust 2 years ago

And then that customer invented curb-side pick up, making millions.

9points

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#86

Had a customer who insisted that the bad weather was causing their internet problems. The company was notorious for these sort of issues, so naturally I agreed. They then went on to ask how fast the wind had to be to blow the wifi away.

SquareJordan Report

Final score:

34points

Amber Jeanpierre 2 years ago (edited)

This happened to me (the customer) and I was right. I spent 3 weeks telling them that every time it rained or got humid the internet went out and they kept telling me "Oh no the weather can't possibly affect that", turns out squirrels had chewed most of the way through my Ethernet wire so it was still able to give a signal but when it got wet it would get dodgy and disconnect. (Edit worked great for me in the end because every time I called they'd give me credit on my bill to get rid of me, I ended up with 9 months free because there were times I called 4x per day)

13points

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#87

You can't tow my car I'll sue you. When I told him he can't park his car in front of the hotel where there was clearly a no parking sign.

UofTSlip Report

Final score:

33points

Monday 2 years ago

You're right sir I can't tow your car, but the towing company can!

21points

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#88

I work at a pizza place and we sell breadsticks. young couple comes in, lady stares at the menu for 5 mins then asks me... "so, your breadsticks. uh, those have bread in them?" no sh*t

weewoo18 Report

Final score:

33points

Sawdust 2 years ago (edited)

Well, they don't contain sticks, I hope. :-)

19points

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#89

Delivering pizza for a store that only served the west side of town. Our other location covered the east side.

Customer: "Can I get a delivery to Pinewood Apartments?"

Me: "No, I'm sorry, we only cover the west side of town. You wanna call our Elm St location at 252-...."

Customer: "Yeah, I thought that, but I live on the west end of the building, so I thought maybe it was you guys."

scottevil110 Report

Final score:

33points

Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

What is happening? This is just frightening.

10points

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#90

I was in Alaska for a fishing trip a few years ago and this guy asked a store clerk if they took American money. We all just stared at him until he got it.

Savage_112 Report

Final score:

33points

Eiram 2 years ago

Sold tours in Alaska. Tourist handed a 20 to me and asked for Alaskan money. I held bill, not understanding for a second. Then I stuffed it in my back packet with one hand and pulled it out with the other and handed it back. He was so happy and walked away.

17points

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#91

Customer: Where's the sugar?

Me: What?

Customer: I ordered sweet corn, this is just corn.

literalmirmaid Report

Final score:

33points

Thorfin Wolfsbane 2 years ago

Gimme some SHUGAAA!

7points

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#92

Today a customer asked me if I was the same Harry as the Harry she spoke with yesterday.

My name is not Harry and I wear a name badge at work..

El_Capitano_MC Report

Final score:

33points

Theoretical Empiricist 2 years ago

"I was Harry yesterday, but today I'm...[looks at nametag]...Phil."

11points

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#93

"The customer is always right, now refund my meal."

He wanted a refund for a party of five because his steak wasn't cooked correctly.

squeeeeenis Report

Final score:

32points

Joe Dunn 2 years ago

Had he eaten it all already too?

8points

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#94

Overheard in a Blockbuster Video about 20 years ago:

"Mom, where are you?"

"I'm over here, by the movies."

Hominumbrus Report

Final score:

32points

Thorfin Wolfsbane 2 years ago

So...not the video game section, then!

2points

#95

"How much is your $10 Dinner Box?" You could tell she felt stupid when I told her the price.

kroolz64 Report

Final score:

30points

Laetitia Astolfi 2 years ago

D659B16E-F...6259c9.gif

4points

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#96

Used to be front office manager in a hotel. In our rooms we had three phones. One next to the bed, one in the bathroom and one on the desk. This is already a lot but in the past we also had an additional 4th phone on the side table. So one day a customer asked to see me requesting the 4th phone because you could clearly see the telephone socket in the wall (neatly covered) and thus his room was not complete. I asked him why he needed 4 phones in his room, he said because clearly in the past there were 4 phones and that's what he paid for (we didn't advertise online with 4 phones, but i had maintenance bring up a forth phone nonetheless).

Final score:

30points

Izzy Curer 2 years ago

Such luxury

7points

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#97

"Can you fix my tablet it is not working right."

"Ok where is it?"

"At home."

"..."

komiroya Report

Final score:

30points

Brian Bennett 2 years ago

Take it with a full glass of water!

3points

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#98

During last year's NHL lockout, a customer was receiving no NHL scores (because there were no games) and demanded that we "unlock" the NHL.

Final score:

30points

Olivier Caissy 2 years ago

"Sure, just give me a couple of hundred of millions and we can sort this out for you!"

8points

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#99

I used to work in a call centre for a large bank and a customer phoned while he was in one of the branches and said the queue was too big so he wanted me to help him. I asked what his query was and he said the ATM was broke so he had to withdraw cash. I asked how I could possibly help him withdraw cash from the bank over the phone and he said "Why can't you just fax it to me?"

Final score:

29points

Sawdust 2 years ago

And that customer's name was Weston Union.

10points

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#100

"Wow... look honey we are saving more than we are spending... We practically are getting paid to get these clothes."

Final score:

27points

Naesil 2 years ago

"I cant afford 400 dollar jacket!" "look its down from 800" "WOW thats like saving 400 dollars get it quick!"

9points

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#101

Had a customer try to negotiate a better price for a pack of 4 mars bars when I worked at a major supermarket chain.

[deleted] Report

Final score:

26points

Auntriarch 2 years ago

It trips you up when you go from a bargaining society to one that doesn't haggle though

15points

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#102

I am a flight attendant and for some reason people on planes don't know what black coffee means. "I'll take a black coffee. With cream and sugar." Me: _

manic_unicorn Report

Final score:

26points

Rachknits 2 years ago

I drink black coffee and pretty much everything I order I'm asked whether or not I'd like milk

10points

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#103

I was at a drive-thru and the person in front of me asked if he can have his food to go.

HelloYouAreCool Report

Final score:

26points

Sawdust 2 years ago

Thank goodness! Ever get stuck behind the guy who wants to sit and eat the meal at the window?

16points

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#104

Are you sure you put the right bumper on my car?

Ma'am there is literally only ONE bumper that will fit on your car.

But you know what? You're right. We put a Toyota Camry bumper on your camaro.

stumpdawg Report

Final score:

25points

Allan Breum 2 years ago

Well, anything is possible with some duct-tape and steel wire.

12points

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#105

Can I purchase just this one sock?

biggerthanbread Report

Final score:

23points

T. D. Bostick 2 years ago

Well, there are plenty of unpaired socks in my drawer. This could be a good business move.

19points

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#106

"You'll lose business because of this" (after an argument) Um I don't own the franchise of Pizza Hut Please I implore you, take your business elsewhere.

[deleted] Report

Final score:

23points

Luther von Wolfen 2 years ago

I work in a low-barrier homeless shelter. Guests have gotten angry and said "I'm going somewhere else!" and I'm "If you have somewhere else to go, please go there. We need the bed for someone who doesn't have someplace else to go."

20points

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#107

“I need you guys to close early every night, because the light from the drivethru is killing my plants”

[deleted] Report

Final score:

23points

Izzy Curer 2 years ago (edited)

Fun fact: light pollution actually does disrupt the growth cycle of plants. They need dark time to process the nutrients they've gathered during the day. Not sure what the guy could do, except maybe build a really tall fence.

18points

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#108

I used to work at a grocery store deli. My coworker for some reason got more stupid questions than anyone else (we'd swap stories every shift), but one went a little like this:

"Hi, what can I get you?" "The 8 piece chicken... how many pieces are in it?" "How...how many pieces are in the 8 piece chicken? Um. There are eight pieces in the 8 piece chicken..." "Ok, I'll have that, please!"

To be fair, the lady was awfully polite but "How many pieces are in the 8 piece chicken" is still a stupid question.

An edit: a few people said "Maybe she meant how many of each piece." No, she meant how many pieces are in the eight piece chicken. I said eight, packaged it up, and she went away happy.

Firekeeper47 Report

Final score:

22points

Rijkærd 2 years ago

Same kind would ask you to cut a pizza into 6 pieces because they cant finish a pizza cut into 8 pieces.

20points

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Ieva Gailiūtė

Ieva is a writer at Bored Panda who graduated in Scandinavian studies from Vilnius University. After learning the Swedish language and getting completely lost in the world of Scandinavian mythology, she figured out that translating and writing is what she's passionate about. When not writing, Ieva enjoys making jewelry, going on hikes, reading and drinking coffee.

Ieva is a writer at Bored Panda who graduated in Scandinavian studies from Vilnius University. After learning the Swedish language and getting completely lost in the world of Scandinavian mythology, she figured out that translating and writing is what she's passionate about. When not writing, Ieva enjoys making jewelry, going on hikes, reading and drinking coffee.

Mindaugas Balčiauskas

I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.

What do you think ?

GoddessOdd 2 years ago

Not exactly a customer, but I was stuck in a line at the DMV, behind a woman who couldn't understand that she wasn't getting her license because she failed the vision test. She failed the vision test because she hadn't brought her glasses, the ones she was required to wear while driving. She hadn't brought her glasses because she didn't want the picture on her license to show her wearing glasses. The poor examiner could not convince her that just because she wore glasses during the driving test, she didn't necessarily have to wear them for the photo. She never really got it, and I couldn't help but think that maybe she didn't need to be driving anyway.

13points

Llewella 2 years ago

Asking the customer if he wants to donate €1,- to a childrens-charity "no, I'm on a diet"

9points

Groundcontroltomajortom 2 years ago

Love your name!

3points

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Megatonberry 2 years ago

Why is it when some people are customers their IQ drops by 50 points, it's a very wierd phenomenon :o.

9points

Nikole 2 years ago

Anxiety?

1point

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Al Christensen 2 years ago

I worked as a cook at a resort buffet during college break. I was replenishing items on the line when a guest pointed to a pan of sliced carrots and asked, "Are those carrots?" I assured him they were, he took some and moved on. As I was finishing up, another guest asked, "Are those carrots?" I again verified his guess. Then the woman next in line (his wife, perhaps) asked, "Are those carrots?" I spent the rest of the shift wondering why those people had trouble recognizing small orange disks.

5points

JeannevB 2 years ago

Smart customer, dumb shopattendant is also possible. I live in the Dutch speaking part of Belgium and I was visiting a friend in Oregon, US. I wanted to buy an iPad but it needed to be set up in the Dutch language. So I ask a man who works in the computer departement: can I reset it in Dutch language? No, not possible, he replied. There were a couple of iPads displayed so I started to see how that would work. In a couple of minutes I found in the settings of the iPad and put it in Dutch. Then proceded to put all the iPads displayed there in Dutch. Had a swell time.

4points

Robert Avent 2 years ago

OK, this one is on me. In the late sixties, I probably became an urban legend in Seattle when I went to the Space Nettle ticket booth and asked the cost of an elevator ride to the top. After she told me the price I then asked her, “How much to get down?” Well, after the hysterical laughter from the queue behind me she had died down a bit she said, “For you honey, we will let you down for free.”—true

4points

Todd 2 years ago

It’s it always the customers. At Starbucks in Florida a sign reads coffee brewed every 30 minutes meaning it’s always fresh even if they don’t sell it all. But they said they were out. Confused I inquired about the sign and they said they brewed that pot 20 minutes ago so they can’t make any more for another 10 minutes. Left without coffee. Wow.

3points

Rconn 2 years ago (edited)

I had a woman once say she shouldnt be charged a fee to use one of our copiers, even though there was a sign informing people of said fee, because her husband wasn't there to read the sign for her. She wasn't illiterate, she read the sign out loud after I pointed it out.

3points

Jo Choto 2 years ago

Sometimes I wonder if it hurts to be stupid.

2points

Jason Marin 2 years ago (edited)

We sell beer at Giant Eagle. All beer must be purchased at the register at hot foods. NOT at a regular checkout. One customer complained that there should be a sign saying beer can only be purchased at hot food. I pointed to the sign and told the customer it was right there. The customer said it should be put where customers could see it. It's a big sign with huge letters. It never ceases to amaze me how many customers "didn't see it."

1point

Toothless Feline 2 years ago

It amazes and astounds me that these people survive to adulthood.

1point

Chelsea Aaron 2 years ago

I used to work in the call center for an internet service provider and was shocked at how many seniors would call us because they forgot their password...to their hotmail/gmail account.

0points

$copper-fractions avatar$

Tiny Dynamine 2 years ago

It's now just negative posts all the time. Either things to make us upset or angry. Please change this and give us more inspiration and humour.

-1point

Memere 2 years ago

Oh, my dear Tiny, it's very easy to choose what posts to look through - just go to the top of the page & click on the categories listed - Art, Photography, Funny, Animals...and if you click on "More" there's a whole bunch of other categories to choose. Not one single Panda is forcing you to read every single post, smh Wishing you a better day!

13points

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Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

H Edwards 2 years ago

I'm sorry m'am, but that comment is almost as silly as some of these posts!

9points

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GoddessOdd 2 years ago

Not exactly a customer, but I was stuck in a line at the DMV, behind a woman who couldn't understand that she wasn't getting her license because she failed the vision test. She failed the vision test because she hadn't brought her glasses, the ones she was required to wear while driving. She hadn't brought her glasses because she didn't want the picture on her license to show her wearing glasses. The poor examiner could not convince her that just because she wore glasses during the driving test, she didn't necessarily have to wear them for the photo. She never really got it, and I couldn't help but think that maybe she didn't need to be driving anyway.

13points

Llewella 2 years ago

Asking the customer if he wants to donate €1,- to a childrens-charity "no, I'm on a diet"

9points

Groundcontroltomajortom 2 years ago

Love your name!

3points

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Megatonberry 2 years ago

Why is it when some people are customers their IQ drops by 50 points, it's a very wierd phenomenon :o.

9points

Nikole 2 years ago

Anxiety?

1point

Load More Replies...

Al Christensen 2 years ago

I worked as a cook at a resort buffet during college break. I was replenishing items on the line when a guest pointed to a pan of sliced carrots and asked, "Are those carrots?" I assured him they were, he took some and moved on. As I was finishing up, another guest asked, "Are those carrots?" I again verified his guess. Then the woman next in line (his wife, perhaps) asked, "Are those carrots?" I spent the rest of the shift wondering why those people had trouble recognizing small orange disks.

5points

JeannevB 2 years ago

Smart customer, dumb shopattendant is also possible. I live in the Dutch speaking part of Belgium and I was visiting a friend in Oregon, US. I wanted to buy an iPad but it needed to be set up in the Dutch language. So I ask a man who works in the computer departement: can I reset it in Dutch language? No, not possible, he replied. There were a couple of iPads displayed so I started to see how that would work. In a couple of minutes I found in the settings of the iPad and put it in Dutch. Then proceded to put all the iPads displayed there in Dutch. Had a swell time.

4points

Robert Avent 2 years ago

OK, this one is on me. In the late sixties, I probably became an urban legend in Seattle when I went to the Space Nettle ticket booth and asked the cost of an elevator ride to the top. After she told me the price I then asked her, “How much to get down?” Well, after the hysterical laughter from the queue behind me she had died down a bit she said, “For you honey, we will let you down for free.”—true

4points

Todd 2 years ago

It’s it always the customers. At Starbucks in Florida a sign reads coffee brewed every 30 minutes meaning it’s always fresh even if they don’t sell it all. But they said they were out. Confused I inquired about the sign and they said they brewed that pot 20 minutes ago so they can’t make any more for another 10 minutes. Left without coffee. Wow.

3points

Rconn 2 years ago (edited)

I had a woman once say she shouldnt be charged a fee to use one of our copiers, even though there was a sign informing people of said fee, because her husband wasn't there to read the sign for her. She wasn't illiterate, she read the sign out loud after I pointed it out.

3points

Jo Choto 2 years ago

Sometimes I wonder if it hurts to be stupid.

2points

Jason Marin 2 years ago (edited)

We sell beer at Giant Eagle. All beer must be purchased at the register at hot foods. NOT at a regular checkout. One customer complained that there should be a sign saying beer can only be purchased at hot food. I pointed to the sign and told the customer it was right there. The customer said it should be put where customers could see it. It's a big sign with huge letters. It never ceases to amaze me how many customers "didn't see it."

1point

Toothless Feline 2 years ago

It amazes and astounds me that these people survive to adulthood.

1point

Chelsea Aaron 2 years ago

I used to work in the call center for an internet service provider and was shocked at how many seniors would call us because they forgot their password...to their hotmail/gmail account.

0points

$copper-fractions avatar$

Tiny Dynamine 2 years ago

It's now just negative posts all the time. Either things to make us upset or angry. Please change this and give us more inspiration and humour.

-1point

Memere 2 years ago

Oh, my dear Tiny, it's very easy to choose what posts to look through - just go to the top of the page & click on the categories listed - Art, Photography, Funny, Animals...and if you click on "More" there's a whole bunch of other categories to choose. Not one single Panda is forcing you to read every single post, smh Wishing you a better day!

13points

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Dorothy Parker 2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

H Edwards 2 years ago

I'm sorry m'am, but that comment is almost as silly as some of these posts!

9points

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