When I was a Teaching Assistant, my professor told me (over a few too many glasses of wine) that when she was 16, and learning to drive, she hit and killed a homeless man.  The local cops showed up at the scene and she confessed she hit him.  After some internal discussions, the cops told her to go home and never speak of it.  They said he was a 'Homeless drunk that probably wandered into the road and wouldnt be missed.'  She's been having nightmares over that day for years since... 

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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This entire situation is f****d. Everything about this.

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My wife doesn't know I have a 17 year old son.

EDIT: Unknowingly got a co-worker preggo right before I left for college. I went back to my hometown for a funeral just last fall and I ran into her. She asked if I would take a paternity test, you know, "for science". That's one test I wish I'd failed.

Not quite sure how to tell my wife. We've been together for 12 years so I wasn't cheating.

EDIT #2: He knows about me now. He or his mom wasn't sure who his dad was. No idea. Saw his facebook the day after I got the test back and it said something about finding his dad. F**k. Debating whether or not to go to his HS graduation. So many emotions....

EDIT #3: You guys are making me tear up at work. I've been agonizing over something else since I found out I was the father. The mom is single, s****y job at Supercuts, not much money in the bank, and still lives at home with her parents. No doubt unable to continue her education since getting pregnant as a college freshman. Should I try to make it right by paying for her to go back to school? After all, she did have to drop out to raise my son and altered the course of her financial future. I can't imagine being a single working parent trying to raise a kid by myself.

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Alleman Jennifer

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1 year ago

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That this even crosses your mind says ur a standup guy. Why not talk to her abt where to go from here?

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Ron Baza

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I guess there’s a crossover between “How can I tell her?” and “I don’t even know how to tell her.”

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Sandella

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1 year ago

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As long as he tells his wife first. Otherwise funding another woman's education in secret isn't great

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A. Starhawk Hunt

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1 year ago

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But tell your wife. I would think she did not expect to have been your first; you did not even know. I know I could never be upset at learning these facts. There is no reason, based on the information in your post, for you to feel guilty if you were not told of the child. And it is amazing that you would ask what you did. I love you for that level of caring.

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Kenny Marsh

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1 year ago

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Stand-up guy? Instead of doing anything, he's asking on social media ffs

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Doodles1983

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I think he plans to do something. He’s turning to the ONLY place to offload and gather ideas. He sounds truly stand-up to me.

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Debrina Blackmoon

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1 year ago (edited)

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So what's your point???

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Steve Robert

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I knew I had a daughter. But her mother is schizophrenic, and I hadn't seen her from the time she was five, in 1985, until 2008, when she found me at 28 years old. She had three kids, no job, a soon to be ex-husband in jail, and no future. I immediately took financial care of them, sent her to college where she received her master's degree in Clinical Psychology, and now teaches third grade. It was something I had to do because. We're pretty close, talk almost everyday, and hopefully one day (in the not too distant future, will get a seven figure inheritance. Doesn't matter the time difference or what happened before. She's my kid and that's just the way it is.

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Lakota Wolf

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1 year ago

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As a daughter myself, thank you. You’re one of the good ones. I guarantee you that you’re her hero, even if she doesn’t say it, and your grandkids will never forget it either.

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Ron Baza

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How does this have fewer Likes than “ She was the one who chose to keep the baby”? Absolute madness.

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Auntriarch

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1 year ago

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You sound like a father

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Zedrapazia

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1 year ago

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Despite the hardness of the situation, he really needs to tell his wife, especially if he wants to use money to help pay for the issue with this accidental child. I am sure she won't be happy if he starts spending money without telling her why. And maybe his new girl doesn't want him to spend this much money on someone who's a stranger either, and they need to talk out some things. Really messy situation overall, I hope it works out well for everyone

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RaroaRaroa

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1 year ago

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Unless his wife is a total cow, I can't see her having a problem with this. It's not like he knew for 17 years and never told her (or was he just in denial and suspected all along). Once his wife knows, he can then discuss assisting the mother, if she even wants assistance.

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BigCityLady

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Agree! Speak with his wife first, make decision and then speak with the mother.

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Nikole

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She was the one who chose to keep the baby though… I realize this will probably get downvoted.

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Spencer's slave

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Not by me and whether others agree with your comment or not, it is a true statement.

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Nikole

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Thank you.

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cats_from_the_void

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Sadly, if nothing changes, she wouldn't be able to choose in some american states

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Doodles1983

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1 year ago

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I won’t downvote or upvote you. But will say she may have been coerced or forced to keep the child. We don’t know that perspective. But, she never went after either potential baby daddy and testing was available 17 years ago.

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sturmwesen

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1 year ago

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ehh depending when she knew she was pregnant, personal belief if her and her family and access to abortion she may or may not have had a say in it

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MurderMittens

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True. Her father may have insisted she end the baby's life, or the scared teenage father may have insisted. Too many women are forced to get abortions by the men who have power over them. That's one reason they need to know there are options.

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Al Joy

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In the USA, it is no longer an option.

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General Anaesthesia

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1 year ago (edited)

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I'm curious, what other choice do you think she had, Nikole, and the effects of any choice on the mother and child?

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Gardener of Weeden

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1 year ago (edited)

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Abortion or adoption? Either of those choices would give the mother a full life. IMHO the childs life would have been much better also. ( no, abortion only removes the tissue that is in the womb, it is NOT a baby until it can live on its own outside the host. ( we will not debate this)

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General Anaesthesia

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I asked because it's easy to say it was the mother's choice, so her responsibility, without saying what, in Nikole's mind, the options were. Because it sounds to me like a rock and a hard place, the woman can't do right, it's always her responsibility. Abortions were and aren't available everywhere. It's a mythe that people are waiting in line to adopt unwanted children. But Nikole doesn't mention options, she only delegates responsibility.

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Nikole

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Oh for Christ’s sake, clearly you know what I was talking about. Just a crappy situation all around, obviously.

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StrangeOne

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I live in a region where abortion is an option, including adoption, and there are mothers who would fight tooth and nail, sacrifice and choose to have her baby and raise them. It doesn't matter, as 2 people came together and ended up creating a baby, whether they meant to or not, in reference to this situation. Now, I'm not saying this Dad owes the mom anything, as her sob story is sounding more and more like a pathetic attempt to get him to "save her", or guilt him into back paying child support. It does have me questioning why now. The son is almost an adult. She has more freedom to start going after what she wants/needs to do to pick herself up more than when he was little. If the son wants to know his dad then that's where the line should end. But since she tricked him into getting a paternity test I think there's more to her agenda than just "Your son wants to meet his dad."

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MurderMittens

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You care more about her TRICKING him into a paternity test than the boy knowing his father? It's possible that she was in love with the other guy, and was hoping he'd marry her and become the boys father. We don't know that this didn't happen. Maybe that guy is gone now and the girl is almost back at square one where she was when she originally got pregnant. Don't judge if you don't know the whole story.

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Irish cailín

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1 year ago

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I wouldn't say she tricked him or is trying to get him to pay back child support seen as the OP never mentioned that she even brought anything up about money. What I do agree with is why didn't she try to find out from the start who was her child's father if she wasn't sure ,and it seems like Op still had connections in the area so she could of got in contact with him. Who I feel sorry for is the son he spent years not knowing which of the possible guys was actually his father.

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MurderMittens

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Maybe there were more than two possibilities for father. We don't know that, do we?

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StrangeOne

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It seems like she tricked him as the guy said she told him it was for "science". Why not just come out with the reason straight up? That's where I started raising an eyebrow. I know HE didn't say anything about child support, but it's likely that's where it's going to go. However, yeah, I agree that it's odd she's just approaching him now. I do feel sorry for the son, too, as he's just caught in the middle of that mess.

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MurderMittens

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1 year ago

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The dad owes the mom 17 years of back child support. It takes two to tango.

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PeachPossum

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1 year ago

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She tricked him? What a pile of pachyderm pellets. "guilt him into back paying child support" -- She doesn't need guilt. She needs a lawyer. A kid costs roughly 15k a year to raise. She's already poured 255k into raising his kid without his help. As the father, he is legally responsibility to pay at least half that amount. That you insinuate that the mother is not entitled to repayment and is somehow devious in this case says a lot about you than it does her.

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StrangeOne

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Why wouldn't she try to find him sooner if she was struggling so much? It would be completely different if he did know she had his kid all that time. Then, yeah, I would have an opposite opinion. He's not even sounding like the type of guy who'd bail on purpose. Seems like he cares but wants to tread carefully because of the fragile situation. I've known parents like this mom, who want child support, but turn around and buy a $500 leather jacket with the money. I've known single parents who rejected child support money. It's their personal choice, but the issue isn't always so black and white. You're reaction to my comment is completely wack, though. She didn't even know for sure that's his child. You know fuckk all about me. I've been a single mom. You don't think I know how much it costs to raise a kid? You don't know that about me, do you. But, yeah, lets jump the gun and just make me out to be the bad guy as if you do know me, over my perspective of this article.

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gotham-panda

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1 year ago (edited)

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"Why wouldn't she try to find him sooner if she was struggling so much?" "She didn't even know for sure that's his child. " You answered your own damned question. She didn't know who the boy's father was. So why should she chase this man down if she was unsure? When she *did* see him again, she asked if he'd be willing to test, and he said yes. Now that he knows, he *owes*.

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gotham-panda

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" guilt him into back paying child support" -- So you think he doesn't owe his son and his mother that money? That it was fine his mother had to scrimp along on a minimum wage job and support him solo? That she should suck up that cost alone and his son never have had any financial support from his father? He absolute owes *both of them* - he helped create the child, and half of any and all associated costs by rights are his to bear. And that debt is not erased just because his son is now an adult. He needs to step up and make it right.

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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She altered the course of her life to care for your son, you'd be doing the right thing.

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Elaine Morinelli

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Yes you should. It's the right thing to do. And if I were your wife I would be proud of you.

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Zedrapazia

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1 year ago

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I am not that keen about it. He really has to talk with her about it first, it's just as well possible she doesn't want her peaceful life disturbed by paying for the life of someone she doesn't know. I'm not here to talk about egoism or anything like that, but it's a possible outcome nonetheless.

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Sue User

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1 year ago (edited)

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I would sincerly rethink living with someone if their response, to this tragic situation and my attemps to help, with "i dont want it to disrupt my peaceful life".

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Gardener of Weeden

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I am so with you on this. "I don't want to mess up my peaceful life with politics" is a statement that made me put sis on low contact. Certain things in this life we need to stand up for, and challenges are what makes life interesting. I hope his wife has as big of a heart as he does, could end up as a beautiful family.

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Autumn

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1 year ago (edited)

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Are we going to ignore the fact that he hasn’t told his wife? He really needs to.

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bob cameron

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It is pretty darn easy for us to say "he needs to .....". It does not mean it is easy for him .... he needs space to come to terms with the consequences of his past actions.

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Doodles1983

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1 year ago

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Maybe. But he owes it to her. He is already on a secrecy path she will struggle with and will escalate issues in their marriage.

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Gina Babe

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1 year ago

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I think that's amazing of him

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Tara Moov

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1 year ago

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OP needs to talk to a lawyer immediately, not post on Reddit or wherever this was poached from asking strangers what to do. The mother of his child suspected he was the father, asked him 17 years later to take a paternity test, and has the positive results on paper. He doesn't seem to realize she could have legal grounds for collecting backdated child support. Get a legal opinion before what you're considering as a choice becomes an obligation.

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PeachPossum

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1 year ago

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Yes, yes and yes.

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Skulls.N.Succulents

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1 year ago

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If you never knew why not tell your wife when the test came up? And that you know for sure why not tell her? The longer you hide it the worse it will be. Stand up guy when it comes to wanting to help but not a great husband in regards to it all.

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Shoe

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1 year ago

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Nothing to be ashamed of. Confront this head on. Go meet your son. Take your wife. I'm guessing she'll handle it much better than you're thinking she will. This is a positive and it's never too late to make things right.

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Moezzzz

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1 year ago

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My husband and I have had this exact conversation, albeit was hypothetical. We've only been together for 10 yrs and he's been all over the world (military), and though he says he was "careful", there's no telling if we'll ever get that knock on our door, saying they believe he may be their dad. If that ever happens, we're both on the same page; we'll gain another child.

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Lady Perkele

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1 year ago

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Listen, my husband has a kid, he stills help financially his biological mom, I came into the family accepting it, only acceptance while on the human experience. Past cannot be changed, but you're on one of those moments I which your choices can create so mamy different realities, follow your heart, your gut and what you believe is fair. And always put the truth up front. If she loves you to the core of your soul, she'll stick and support. Much love

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Sandra Morison

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1 year ago

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You need to do right by everyone and first thing is to tell your wife, it happened before her but will affect her now. Talk to your wife before making financial commitments but kudos to you for even thinking about the impact it had on your daughters mother.

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Silre

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1 year ago

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This post was from 11 years ago. I hope he ended up doing the right thing.

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Sunny Day

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1 year ago

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If mom didn't know who the dad was, she was partying pretty heavy at that time (being young & stupid). THAT is why she had to drop out of college. She has also had her parents' support for 18 years, and could have gone back to college. By all means, calculate what 18y of child support would have been (with 4 years of minimal income in college) and give her that. But don't feel you need to pay for her college. And whatever you do - your wife gets a say in the decision.

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Jo Davies

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My partner was told a few years ago that he had a daughter, 21, 2 kids of her own. Happened about 10 years before we met so not a problem for me. We hel0ed her (and her mother) financially for almost a year. By this I men monthly grocery shop, nappies for her 2 kids, clothes, mobile and m9re. He decided to have a paternity test done after about 10 months. Came back as definitely n9t the daddy. This poor girls mother swears blind to this day that he paid the lab to say it! And we still helped the poor girl out for a while afterwards.

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Jo Davies

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Sorry. Written on phone and didn't check before posting!

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Elizabeth Anderson

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1 year ago

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What a nice thought, but he isn't responsible for paying for the mother's education. For the son's, sure. She could have pursued child support from him and didn't

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MontanaMariner

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1 year ago

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Heart breaking/warming story until I get to the very bottom and see that it's attributed to a "ballsd33p". Hahahahahahahahaha.

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David Fox

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1 year ago

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Sad to say that there's men out there who don't even know they've even got a 27 years old kid.

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Holly Stevens

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1 year ago

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Well, if you have those means, you could pay for the son's education

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PeachPossum

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1 year ago

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Good for you that you feel responsible and truly want to help. Telling the wife will be a tough talk but gather your courage and toss it out there. Better she hears it from you than Child Support Services. Before you start thinking about doling out cash to this woman, talk to a lawyer. You owe back child support to the tune of over 100k. Depending on your state, you may still owe back child support even after your kid turns 18. Get a lawyer, get the facts, figure out how much is owed. Knowing the laws in your state and how you will manage the payments will make it easier to talk to your wife. Best of luck to you.

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Dana Trahan

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1 year ago

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I agree if you are thinking of it you already know it is THE RIGHT THING. Please don’t be like so many other men. You sound like a very intelligent man. Be that man. Your son deserves it.

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Strings

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1 year ago

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I would suggest being completely open with your wife. Not only does she deserve the truth, but part of a spouse's job is to help through the tough issues. Not telling her is depriving yourself of your greatest asset for navigating this

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WonderWoman

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1 year ago (edited)

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HAppened to a someone I know, the BM (Birth mother) only contacted BF (birth father) when her husband left and she wanted money. Child was mid teens by then, then brought BF to court to demand he pay from birth - and she had a better lawyer, they admitted the BF was never aware of child. He had to pay. The child - now adult - views BF as cash cow and milks him for money.

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StrangeOne

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This is exactly the scenario I'm getting from this.

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PeachPossum

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1 year ago

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He should not be off the hook just because he "didn't know" and wasn't around to help. He's 50% responsible for that kid. Depending on his state, he may still owe back child support, even though the child is now an adult. That doesn't make him a cash cow; he's obeying the law.

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Al Joy

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1 year ago

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First. Talk to your wife.

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Wednesday

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8 months ago

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Wow. You didn't know, so don't put your self in agony. Just talk to your wife, tell her what you are thinking about doing, and make it clear that you feel like you should do something. Hopefully, she will be understanding. If not, well... hopefully you will be strong enough to continue to do what you think is right.

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Michelle Smith

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1 year ago

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Just the fact that you are asking us, shows you’re a standup guy. Do the right thing for him and for you oh yeah, you will live with regret.

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EJN

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1 year ago

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Talk to your wife first. Since the co-worker wasn't sure who the father was, I don't believe that you should feel too much like her education/lifestyle/job etc. is your fault. On the other hand, since the boy is indeed your biological son (as opposed to a child you reared) you are noble to feel some connection and responsibility for him. Do what is right by helping him get going in the world. You don't have to make anything right by her because you didn't even know about the pregnancy. Your wife needs to know first and have some input on this matter, and you might want to talk to a lawyer also.

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LV426

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1 year ago

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Preggo? Really?

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Maxuen Xyz

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1 year ago

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I Just don't get why the mother never bothered to contact him and Tell him

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SarahBee

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1 year ago

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Sounds like she wasn't sure who the father was, and paternity tests didn't exist back then.

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Steal

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1 year ago

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How about you tell your wife about the situation and not leave her in the dark. The longer you wait to tell her, the worse it will be for your marriage....just sayin'.

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Amery

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1 year ago

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WISH my dad thought like you...

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Missy Lanes

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1 year ago

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Yes and pay all balance of child support owed, but most importantly be his father. How would you feel if you were that disregarded boy all your life thru 12th grade graduation? It's not too late, but you did know all along, right? If I understood correctly ... either way - now you know so get to know each other and have your father-son relationship. We all have missteps, bad decisions made and guilt. YET, REGRET IS WHAT DEVIATES US. God bless you all 🙏💞👨‍👦

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Michelle Smith

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1 year ago

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He does not owe back child support for a child. He did not know existed. I am proud of the other things that he is doing and hope he maintains a relationship with his son. He does need to do the right thing and tell his wife so that she can have a say in Decisions that will affect her life

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Doodles1983

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1 year ago

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Wife MUST be told. First job. Ideally, she should have been told before you even tested that this was potentially a thing. Because there is already an element of deception/secrecy. A kid who messed up at 21 is vastly different to a husband messing up at 38. Tell her. And don’t say, “I didn’t want to worry you ‘til I knew it was sure”, apologise for not telling her the second you knew it was a possibility. That (as the wife) would be my biggest concern. The mother doesn’t sound like she will come after you for anything, or she would have years ago. The bigger thing here (I think) was that her son could know the other half of his origin. At bare minimum, you should give him that. If you’re willing to help her through college, that may not sit well with wife. I wouldn’t suggest that. Offer to help son with college, son can then choose to help mum out finishing degree or financially at a later date.

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Leonardo Colle

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1 year ago

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wasnt it about secrets about others... o well

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Kim Shannon

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1 year ago

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I'd say you should be honest with your wife and see if your son wants you in his life. His mom can figure her own c**p out. Plenty of people work AND go to school.

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censorshipsucks

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1 year ago

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Definitely support her. Man up. Stand up.

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SOMEONE

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1 year ago

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Wdym you've mean together for 12 years so it's not cheating??

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juice

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1 year ago

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the son is 17, so he slept with the other woman 5 years before he started seeing his current wife.

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Gardener of Weeden

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1 year ago (edited)

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Please don't downvote someone for confusion.

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Stephen Mwangi

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1 year ago

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You're not a parent if you didnt make a joint decision..

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Ron Baza

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1 year ago

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He accidentally had sex? That’s definitely a key detail I missed.

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Nikki Sevven

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1 year ago

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I'm so angry that you missed 17 years of your son's life.

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I fix the computers of everyone in my family.
They all love porn sites... everyone.

nonplayer , cottonbro studio Report

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Vic

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1 year ago

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I mean what's not to love..

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Since most are about sex (I do have sex ones but meh, they're all basically been stated) here's something different:

I knew a girl I was interested in dating that fabricated her entire childhood. Literally, from birth to about 11 Years old was a complete lie. She claimed she was born outside of the country. She had pictures of her in another country (Ireland, completely faked) she faked an accent. She would stage fake phone calls with her grandparents.

She wasn't aware that her parents were friends with a mutual friend of mine. I had met them before, and they mentioned her. The specifically mentioned her being baptized in a church in the area when she was born. So hearing that, I went to research. Yup.... the /entire/ thing was fabricated.

I never did anything out of fear of what it would do to her.

We later had sex, completely protected.

She told my friends that I didn't use protection, took her by force and she had to abort my child.

Looking back, I should have seen that coming.

toccoto , Ron Lach Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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Women like her are the reason actual rape and abuse victims aren't being believed.

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When I was about 8 or 9 (this was in the late 80's), I was wanting to get back my Ghostbuster's action figures that my dad had hidden in his closet as a punishment for attempting to bury my sleeping brother in the sandbox at school. I was digging around when I thought I saw them on the top shelf (which made sense) and climbed on the dresser and reached up for it and pulled it down. A shoebox filled with cash, about a dozen passports, maps, an instamatic camera, a pistol, and a silencer and several photos of people spilled out over the floor. I wasn't thinking much, I hurridly packed it all back in and placed it back in it's spot.

My dad obviously had to have noticed it was disturbed, but didn't say anything and I was too frightened about getting my butt whooped for attempting to take back the toys and being in there. Years and years later, my dad died of bronchial cancer and it wasn't until we were making funeral arrangements did I find out he was a "state department liaison" and that we wouldn't need to pay for the funeral and the government would help out for expenses until we were 18. Apparently my mother thought he was a translator, but I'm not so sure. Deep dark secret? Yes, that my dad took with him to the grave. Not sure if cringe worthy.

TL;DR: I'm pretty sure my dad was an assassin or secret agent. I'm not sure which.

reallynotcool , Sora Shimazaki Report

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Beth H

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1 year ago

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This is one super interesting. Would love to know details.

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I know my ex is secretly having sex with my dad.

anon , Monica Silvestre Report

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Gina Babe

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1 year ago

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That's a big story in a little sentence!

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I have two sisters. Mom died more than 20 years ago. A few years back my father was going in for a high risk surgery. The night before he went in he told my oldest sister that he wasn't really her dad. It turns out that before they got married my mom and dad broke up briefly and my mom hooked up with some guy, getting pregnant in the process. She told my father and the two ended up eloping. For whatever reason they never told my sister and my father promised to keep the secret before my mom passed. After telling my sister, my father asked her to not tell anyone else. She's talked to her husband, myself and my second sister about it. My dad has no idea we know.

He also has no idea how much I respect him for raising another man's child and always loving her like the daughter she was.


Second story is that it turns out my uncle (by marriage) molested my sisters for a number of years. When my sisters told my mom and dad, they didn't believe them. It eventually stopped. When my sister had kids she told him that they would never be left alone with him. My sister just told me about it this past Christmas, 40 years after the fact. My uncle has no idea that I know.

randompostingguy , Felipe Cespedes Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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I think your uncle and parents need a little visit from some angry pandas.

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Last year, this girl I knew from high school got pregnant. She was single, but she uploaded ultrasound photos and even had professional maternity pictures done. The baby would have been born in July, but then suddenly she cut contact with people and started posting things implying that the baby had died somehow.

The truth: She faked the whole pregnancy to try to get the "father" to be with her. She was wearing a fake belly the whole time. This also isn't the first time she's done it, but as far as everybody else knows she just lost the baby somehow.

extrazipper , Leah Kelley Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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Miscarriage is a heart breaking thing, and so many people actually go through it and suffer, yet you're here faking for the attention.

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The receptionist at my work is screwing my boss. She doesn't do anything required for her job and essentially has a free ride.

The other day while aimlessly wandering facebook, I came across her husband's profile (through a friend of a friend). She has never come to work with a ring on her finger. She has only alluded that she has a casual boyfriend. She took three weeks of vacation last summer and said she was going to Hawaii with her mom. Turns out that was when she got married and had her honeymoon.

sarahbear121 , Pavel Danilyuk Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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Shame on the boss for the abuse of power and shame on her for not only cheating but using this to her advantage as well.

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A girl from my high school went to Hawaii on vacation with her friends and some of their parents while her boyfriend stayed home. While she was there, she got really drunk and ended up having a threesome with 2 other boys she met on the beach. Well, her friends saw what happened and she was worried her boyfriend would find out, so she claimed she was r**ed. After a crazy 48 hours for her and the boys she slept with, she finally admitted she was not raped and that all of the acts were consensual...only after the two boys had been processed, arrested and charged with rape. She quickly left the state. Her boyfriend still doesn't know. Found out from a family friend of hers that I know well. What a c**t.

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Peter Parker

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1 year ago

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What if she were too much of a chicken to finally admit the truth? Scary..

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My grandfather went out and stabbed my cousin's elementary school bully's dad to death. My cousin's bully bullied him everyday for years, and his parents knew and justified it by saying it was a good way for their boy to assert himself and that my cousin needed to grow some balls. Upon my grandfather finding out, especially when he learned they were white, he grabbed the biggest kitchen knife in the house and left. He came back several hours later with a bloody t-shirt and the knife missing. The next morning on the news, there was a story about a murdered man found in an alley way stabbed multiple times. That man was the bully's dad. My cousin was never bullied again. My grandfather was never caught.

Edit - I was only about 4 when this happened, but I was smart enough to put the pieces together. My grandfather passed away a few years ago.

anon , Nicola Barts Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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Bit overkill. He deserved to had some sense knocked into him but brutally murdering the father of a young boy is too much.

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My roommate is bulimic. I think she thinks she's being sneaky because she can throw up really, really quietly, but I can hear it. It breaks my heart to catch her in the middle of a binge and have her pretend she was actually putting away that jar of peanut butter instead of eating out of it with her hand.

emiloca , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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Tess

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1 year ago (edited)

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I'm not so sure that this fits within the post's title. It's not something that you would share with someone else behind this person's back, but it certainly isn't something that you can just pretend isn't happening. Lives will be destroyed if the problem is just ignored. The longer they suffer alone, the harder it will be for them get better; if at all. Even if it's just a line of communication being opened between two friends as the first step. Knowing that they aren't alone in this can go a long way towards them getting the help that they need.

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My boyfriend hung himself 3 years ago and his brother saved him just in time. Something I know that he would never tell me himself and I will never let him know that I know. But it scares me

porkspark , Sofia Alejandra Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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Best you can do is be there for him and really check on him. Make sure he's getting help if he needs it. He's probably scared and ashamed too.

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My roommate freshman year in college was a forever alone type - always tried but things never seemed to work out. One day, I'm chilling on my computer and start getting hungry, so I asked him if he wanted to go get food. He replied "no, guess why?" I guessed he had already eaten, but he surprised me by saying that he had a date with this hot chick from a class of his. So I congratulate him and ask him about her - he describes her as that ideal blonde, big boobs, perky nice sexy girl next door.

So I go get dinner and give him some space. I take my books and laptop and go study for a few hours at the library. I text him to ask if it's ok for me to come back to the room (it was getting late). He said yeah. Date turned out not so good though.

After him buying dinner and ice cream, she drops the bomb that she's actually a lesbian and apparently thought it was just a friend type thing. He wasn't very happy about it, but he didn't really want to talk about it so I let it go and went to bed.

Around 4 am, I wake up, which is odd cause I'm usually a deep sleeper. I roll over and hear this kind of thudding noise. I glance over without getting up and there I see my hefty roommate humping rather vigorously the dresser - seriously, no pants on, just banging the dresser. I immediately rolled over and pretended to be asleep... I didn't get to sleep before he finished though ಠ_ಠ

TL;DR: Forever alone roommate has a bad date, finds out shes a lesbian, bangs dresser.

FFF12321 , Mikhail Nilov Report

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marcy

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1 year ago

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WHAT

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I know that my dad is a sex worker and runs his "business" out of his home.

cyberwin , cottonbro studio Report

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Loverboy

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1 year ago

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As long as he's not hurting anybody, it's safe, and he's not doing anything immoral then I don't see the problem here. All have to make money somehow.

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A friend of my roommate at the time was this cute girl we'll call Mel. Mel and my Roomie (female) were heading out on a thursday to have some drinks with friends with the intention of returning to our Apartment at the end of the night to crash. Mel had a bit of a crush on me and before she left she told me she was sleeping in my bed that night and I didn't have a say in the matter. Fine by me, I thought, I was single and she was cute.

Fast forward to 3am. I wake up to my roomie asking for help getting Mel upstairs, our apartment was on the second floor. So I get out of bed, look over the railing and see this girl absolutely out-f*****g-cold at the bottom of the stairs. Well, looks like I'm not getting any tonight, I then carry this girl upstairs to the living room where she gets tucked into the couch and I head back to bed.

I awake the next morning and head to the kitchen for breakfast before work. As soon as I walked into the kitchen the smell hit me. I immediately started looking around, it didn't take long to find the source. There, in the middle of the kitchen, is one of the kitchen chairs and on the floor in front of it is a cupcake tray. Sitting on top of the tray is a steaming nightmarish pile of beer and shooter induced fecal slurry that would have made a grizzly bear proud. I s**t you not, it was one of the biggest single piles I've ever seen and the kicker was that it belonged to a lady. A dainty, petite lady that at some point in the night had wandered into the kitchen, and had the where-with-all to put a cupcake tray on the floor before pulling out a chair to brace herself with(there was some s**t on the chair too) so she could comfortably s**t on the tray.

That's when I just walked away. I didn't see much of her after that but my roomie who worked with her said it's obvious that she has no clue she did it. She was black out drunk so I'm not surprised. I guess the couple people that did know started calling her cupcake which she thinks is a cute nickname....

wakestrap , Alina Levkovich Report