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Despite what you might hear some of your friends tell you in a panicky voice, turning 30 is not the end of the world. And the same goes for any other impressively big-looking jubilee! With life experience, you accumulate lots of knowledge about how the world works.
And even though it’s impossible to turn back time, you can use your hard-won wisdom to improve your future and give other people a helping hand in making the most of their youth. We’ve collected some of the best life advice that people aged 30 and over have shared in a couple of spot-on online threads. Check out the tips as you scroll down—you might find something useful no matter your age!
Bored Panda got in touch with Jodi Wellman, MAPP, who was kind enough to explain why big birthday milestones are so important to us, as well as how to separate the wheat from the chaff when it comes to the overwhelming amount of information and advice found online. You'll find her insights below. Wellman is the founder of Four Thousand Mondays and the author of You Only Die Once: How to Make It to the End with No Regrets.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Don’t EVER feel bad for taking days off work. If you got PTO, use it.
Huddo's sister 1 day ago
Very true. My first year working in a kindergarten, I didn't know my sick leave didn't roll over at the end of the year. There were times I could have taken off (mostly because of fibro flare ups) but didn't.
"The psychology world refers to consequential moments that expose us to the boundaries of our existence as 'boundary moments.' Birthdays that end with zeros can act as profound boundary moments because they trigger feelings that the decade to come feels subjectively different than the one we just crushed, even if we’re the same person when we turn forty on Wednesday as we were on Tuesday when we were only thirty-nine," Wellman explained to Bored Panda via email.
"One idea to stress less over the big birthdays is to tap into the 'fresh start effect'—the phenomenon where salient temporal landmarks provide the motivation for aspirational behavior," she said that these fresh starts motivate us to get our act together.
"New Year’s resolutions, the first day of the month, and starting a new decade of life can be explained by science! Boundaries between the same-old, same-old, ordinary past and the promise of a new and improved clean slate future ignites the confidence we need to pursue and stick with our goals," she said.
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#2
Stop worrying about other people think, you can't control how other people feel. Focus on yourself.
Michael Largey 22 hours ago
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do." - Eleanor Roosevelt
#3
You only get one body. Take care of it. Exercise, even if it’s just regular walks. Eat better. Get good sleep. Any movement beats sitting on the couch.
And don’t amass STUFF when you’re young. You have to move it all and live with it all.
"Big birthday milestones offer tremendous opportunities to redefine and redesign our lives; we get to ask ourselves who we’d like to evolve into for the next ten-year chapter of our existence. What activities, traits, and relationships do we want to carry forward from the last decade, and what might we want to ditch in a fresh start towards being the best versions of ourselves."
Meanwhile, we asked Wellman for her advice on sifting through the huge amount of information to be found online to get to what's truly useful and helpful. "I encourage a healthy 'quality and quantity' questioning exercise when embarking on an online info-seeking session," she said.
"In terms of quality, ask yourself if the source you’re referring to is reputable. It’s better to research that weird lump you found on your body by perusing a hospital/ MD-sanctioned website than it is to dive into a chat thread with contributions from hypochondriacs who’ve self-diagnosed every bump on the body as stage-four cancer," Wellman advised.
#4
Become someone that you can put up with... The older you get, the harder it becomes to change, even when you don't like who you are.
You'll meet awful, miserable people, who continue to be awful and miserable because they've been doing it for too long and it's all they know... Being an a*****e is both a crime and a punishment.
#5
Save money, have fun and enjoy your ability to recover faster. It will fade.
#6
Save money.
Look after your teeth. Clean them a lot
Time flies in your 20s. Your 30s come around faster than you think. Have fun but also be mindful of this. Dont waste too much time.
"In terms of the quantity question, this can come down to how much time and/or volume you are letting yourself spend surfing and consulting information sources," she noted that the large number of details to be found online can be both a blessing and a curse.
"Sometimes, it’s helpful to research a topic for 20 minutes tops… or to agree to consult only four reputable sources before falling down the internet rabbit hole. You can make a smart decision on what mattress to buy, for example, without spending seven hours researching the merits of memory foam vs. coils."
Wellman also urged everyone to be honest with themselves whether they're "succumbing to the oh-so-natural confirmation bias—that tendency we have to seek out and give greater credence to information that supports what we already believe or want to be true." It's something that many of us do unconsciously.
"If you’re considering different cities to travel to for an upcoming vacation, for example, be suspicious if you click on all the 'Why You Absolutely Must Visit Prague' articles and conveniently skip over the 'Pitfalls of Prague' sources… because you really just want to reinforce your preference for visiting that city. Confirmation bias is a tough one to overcome, but it’s worth it to ask ourselves if our research is neutral or influenced."
#7
Stop putting every minute of your life on social media, your young and stupid actions will haunt you.
#8
Keep learning. Every day. It accumulates so much over 10, 20, 30 years. The difference between people who are learning and those who don't is already noticeable at 20. At 40, it's huge. At 60, I believe it will be astronomical.
With learning I mean everything that's important, in particular things such as how to make friends and to be good friend, how to be a good parent, how to make sound financial decisions, and anything fun you want to learn. Just don't think you'll ever be done learning.
The Darkest Timeline 14 hours ago
Here’s a tip to get a head start on the “keep learning” thing: rather than complaining about all the things in school that you deem “irrelevant,” treat it all as relevant and worth committing to memory. You never know when you’ll need a piece of knowledge.
#9
Get off the internet and learn to actually live in the real world.
keyboardtek 1 day ago
But avoid stupid life threatening activities like sitting on the edge of cliff.
According to ‘Relate,’ traditional life milestones are something that stress many people out. Millennials and members of Generation Z from the United Kingdom feel a lot more pressure than members of older generations when it comes to getting married, buying homes, and having kids.
Some of this pressure comes from the people themselves, as well as society in general, parents, and the media—both social and traditional.
Younger people are more likely to feel the pressure from social media. And men (69%) are more likely than women (60%) to feel more pressure when it comes to reaching life milestones.
#10
Work sucks.
Even if you like what you do, know that good feeling may not last.
Find value and enjoyment elsewhere in life.
Work is just for making money and paying bills.
You work so you can do the other stuff.
SM 1 day ago (edited)
I disagree with this. I guess to some people work is just where they get their money to do other things, but at least for me for the most part I have enjoyed what I do for work. I can't really see how I could look back at my life (I'm right now 67) and realize that I spent at least a third of it or more doing something I found no value in it other than to fund the rest of my life.
#11
Floss. Prioritize sleep. Learn to be alone. Move your body every day try not to eat c**p or drink a lot of alcohol if you can because it’ll ruin your body Meditate meditate. Meditate.
#12
Invest some spare money. It's insane what compound interest can do even with lower amounts if you start early.
‘Relate’ notes that some of the main reasons why people say they haven’t reached their life milestones (yet) include a lack of confidence (12%), putting others first (12%), and mental health issues (12%).
Generation Z, in particular, is feeling this confidence crisis most acutely, with 20% of respondents saying they have a fear of failure and 18% opening up that they lack motivation.
‘Relate’ counselor Natasha Silverman had this to say: “The early 30s seem to be a real crunch point, and people can judge themselves unfairly when they haven’t done things they think they ‘should have.’ The truth is that people do things at different points, not always in the same order, and some take a different path entirely. That’s absolutely valid and to be celebrated. It’s all about creating a life that’s authentic to you.”
#13
Take care of your body and never stop working out. And start saving for retirement. You will age, and you are responsible for your care until you die. Make sure your 90 year old self is okay. Be there for yourself. Start now.
#14
Marry someone smarter than you.
Be good to your teeth.
Make Dependability your most important quality.
Michael Largey 22 hours ago
"Marry someone smarter than you." is only 50% achievable. It can be done by only one person per marriage.
#15
Don’t pre-reject yourself. Apply for that job. Ask that person out. Even if the odds aren’t in your favor. If you’re too scared of a “no”, then you’ll never get a “yes”.
Data1001 10 hours ago
More important than applying for various jobs out of the blue, is to cultivate relationships with past employers -- especially those who appreciated you. Not saying you need to be buddies or anything, but check in with them every year or so, at minimum, telling them what you're up to, and passing along a quick word of appreciation. Most of my best jobs have come from those relationships -- when you reach out to someone while looking for work, and they say, "Your timing is actually kind of crazy. It turns out..."
Around a third of millennials and members of Generation Z thought that traditional life milestones were outdated.
Many young people feel that other, more modern milestones should be better recognized, including adopting, leaving an unhealthy job, completing a difficult physical challenge, deciding to stay single, seeking therapy, and clearing student debt, among others.
#16
Travel often. Travel everywhere. Travel while you’re young enough to enjoy it. Money will return. Memories won’t. My dad saved every paycheck he’s ever had, as many in that generation did. “Save for retirement! You’re crazy if you don’t save every penny!” he used tell me I would work every day the rest of my life if I didn’t stop traveling and start saving. My dad died a few years back, about 6 months before his very first trip abroad. We used his retirement savings on a funeral.
#17
Be able to distinguish a 'need' versus a 'want.'
Also, stop thinking 30 is old. I know OP doesn't outright say it, but the implication is that people in their 30s have it all figured out. Never stop learning new things.
#18
1. **Invest in Yourself:** Focus on personal and professional development. Acquiring new skills and knowledge will pay off in the long run.
2. **Build Strong Relationships:** Cultivate meaningful connections with friends, family, and colleagues. Relationships play a crucial role in personal and professional success.
3. **Financial Planning:** Start saving and investing early. Establish good financial habits to secure your future.
4. **Embrace Change:** Be adaptable and open-minded. Life is full of changes, and being flexible helps you navigate challenges more effectively.
5. **Prioritize Well-being:** Take care of your physical and mental health. Establishing healthy habits now will contribute to a happier and more fulfilling life.
6. **Set Realistic Goals:** Define clear, achievable goals for yourself. Break them down into smaller steps and celebrate your successes along the way.
7. **Learn from Mistakes:** Don't be afraid to make mistakes. They are opportunities for growth and learning. Use failures as stepping stones to success.
8. **Travel and Explore:** If possible, explore different cultures and perspectives. Traveling broadens your horizons and enriches your life.
9. **Time Management:** Mastering time management is crucial. Prioritize tasks, avoid procrastination, and make the most of your time.
10. **Be Present:** Enjoy the present moment. Life moves quickly, and it's essential to appreciate the journey rather than constantly focusing on the destination.
How old are you, and what’s the best life advice you’d give someone else, no matter their age, dear Pandas? Were you, or are you at all, worried about turning 30?
Do you wish you would have done something entirely different if you could go back in time? How do you motivate yourself to keep changing for the better? Let us know what you think in the comments!
#19
Get a toilet stool to prop your legs up while pooping. It lessens the likelihood of getting hemorrhoids.
#20
Never stop learning and always be curious.
Travel, career, hobbies, relationships, etc.
My favorite piece of advice that was ever given to me was: “break down the walls of second hand information and experience the world first hand.”
Obviously very generic but the point they were trying to make (I think) was to see things with your own eyes before making any sort of judgement.
#21
Its way easier to stay in shape than get in shape.
Exercise.
#23
Wear earplugs at concert and doing other loud things. I wish I had.
#24
***(1) Everyone who is really good at something was really bad at that same thing at one time***, unless they were a prodigy (extremely rare). Don't let fear of "failure" or embarrassment keep you from working towards your goals or experiencing new, great things. And nobody is really looking at you anyway.
***(2) Don't stress about keeping your life on some sort of timeline.*** Don't fall into thinking "I should be married by now" or "I should be well on my way to my career by now." Everyone finds their way at a different pace, and a lot of people make poor decisions when they become impatient to stay on this fictitious timeline.
***(3) At your job, find the good departmental/divisional administrative assistant that knows the ropes and is super competent, befriend this person, learn from them, and treat this person like gold***. These are the people who save your a*s and really get things done, and usually know a lot more about what is really going on and how things work than even the big bosses. Always ask nicely, always say thank you, nice gift at Christmas.
***(4) Being alone for a while is a lot better than being surrounded by toxic people***. Find friends who are emotionally healthy, fun, stimulating, and supportive. It's important to be supportive yourself when a friend has rough patch, but beware of people who are always in these rough patches.
***(5) If you are having trouble finding a good romantic relationship or making friends, take a break from the chase and work on yourself.*** Get yourself in good working order mentally and develop your interests. Interesting people who are relatively emotionally healthy rarely have trouble making good friends and dating.
***(6) Long term relationships are often a series of shorter term relationships where you fall in and out of love, in and out of infatuated periods.*** Not every rough patch means you should break up.
***(7) Don't stay in romantic relationships where you are more into them than they are to you***, this will end up draining you and shredding your self-esteem.
***(8) Don't listen to past-you who berates you for not starting things sooner. Listen to future-you who is so happy you started now.***.
Brian Droste 10 hours ago
I read one long one here. Not going to read another long one. Need to keep these down to no more than three. Some if not most of these are probably repeats of ones I already read anyway.
#25
Don't listen to us old farts, live your life, make your own mistakes and learn from them.
Michael Largey 22 hours ago (edited)
"Don't listen to us old farts," says an old fart. If I take his advice, then I must ignore it. And if I ignore it, then I'm taking it.
#26
Take care of yourself first. Make sure you're doing what **you** need to do to get by in life & to have the life you want. The right people will find you / you will find them. If someone feels like they're not a match for you or your personality, don't push it! Don't try to change for them and don't try to change them. And of course, don't change your goals for anyone but you.
Your 20's are all about exploring and trying new things. Have fun, be safe, make good choices. Try to get outside every day even if it's just for a walk. Save money and try to make good habits stick. Learn how to cook, do your own finances, fix a leaky sink, garden, etc. Enjoy life !
#27
Study hard while you can. It gets harder to experience and learn new things as you get older, so grab what you can now.
Data1001 10 hours ago
Meh. "Studying hard" is only worthwhile if you're working towards a specific goal, like a degree or a doctorate or passing the bar. Studying hard just to get good grades is kind of a waste of precious time. But spending time learning about things that you really *care* about or are interested in -- now that can be very worthwhile. My point is, don't use your free time to "study hard" because society tells you it's the appropriate thing to do. Find something that tweaks your interest -- study *that* instead.
#28
Start a good workout routine and diet before you gain weight and your metabolism slows.
keyboardtek 1 day ago
My motivational quote to keep me on a daily exercise routine: "In six months you will have either six months of excuses, or six months of progress. The choice is yours alone." I was amazed that noticeable improvement occurred within a couple of weeks, not months. The fact that the exercise alleviates my arthritis pain is also a good motivator.
#30
Sunscreen.
Note: this post originally had 63 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
What do you think ?
Data1001 10 hours ago
Okay, I'm probably older than a lot of BP readers, so I'll add something to the conversation. 1) Give other people a break. You may want to curse that person out for something, but you never know what other people are going through. So give them the benefit of the doubt until & unless they prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they do not deserve it. 2) Give yourself a break. Don't beat yourself up with negative self-talk -- it only serves to make you feel worse. Just tell yourself you're doing the best you can, and remember that positive self-change usually takes time. Baby steps.
Dog Mom to Zoe 21 hours ago
YOU CAN LEARN FROM OTHER PEOPLE'S MISTAKES. When I purchased my home, I vowed NOT to refinance for a lower payment. I refinanced for a lower INTEREST RATE and kept the SAME mortgage payment. I know someone who constantly refinanced for lower payments, to buy a car, to upgrade a kitchen, etc. and now she owes more on her house than it's worth. She's 70 so doubt it will ever get her home paid off. Regardless of the lesson, LEARN FROM OTHERS.
Data1001 10 hours ago
Okay, I'm probably older than a lot of BP readers, so I'll add something to the conversation. 1) Give other people a break. You may want to curse that person out for something, but you never know what other people are going through. So give them the benefit of the doubt until & unless they prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they do not deserve it. 2) Give yourself a break. Don't beat yourself up with negative self-talk -- it only serves to make you feel worse. Just tell yourself you're doing the best you can, and remember that positive self-change usually takes time. Baby steps.
Dog Mom to Zoe 21 hours ago
YOU CAN LEARN FROM OTHER PEOPLE'S MISTAKES. When I purchased my home, I vowed NOT to refinance for a lower payment. I refinanced for a lower INTEREST RATE and kept the SAME mortgage payment. I know someone who constantly refinanced for lower payments, to buy a car, to upgrade a kitchen, etc. and now she owes more on her house than it's worth. She's 70 so doubt it will ever get her home paid off. Regardless of the lesson, LEARN FROM OTHERS.
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