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30 Women Share Medical Horror Stories Where They Had To Endure Pain For No Good Reason, And It’s Scary How Common The Situation Is
If you're a man, it sounds silly that something as universal as healthcare can be subjective. But when it comes to pain, women are treated differently than we are.
One study, for example, found that women in the emergency department who report having acute pain are less likely to be given opioid painkillers (the most effective type) than men. After they are prescribed, women also have to wait longer to receive them.
To get a better understanding of the scope of this problem, Redditor u/Ancient-Abs published a post, asking: "Why are many gynecological procedures done without pain medicine?" and sharing their own experience having an IUD inserted.
The story inspired many other women to share the nightmares they have gone through as well, shedding light on this difficult topic we don't talk about enough.
Image credits: presidenciamx (not the actual photo)
u/Ancient-Abs told Bored Panda they discovered this "when I myself underwent an IUD insertion and then had significant pain during and afterwards. My doctor acted like I was an exception and that most women felt nothing, but as I asked my friends, I discovered that multiple women have pain and that numbing the area is possible but doctors don't do it."
The Redditor thinks this disparity between men and women is "a result of systemic misogyny that was institutionalized in the Middle Ages in medicine to avoid giving women pain control during birth because they felt that women had the curse of Eve on them and they were fulfilling God's plan by letting them suffer."
"In modern medicine, this practice has been passed down but relabeled as women don't feel as much pain as men or that they are overreacting because the cervix doesn't have nerves," u/Ancient-Abs added. "It does and you can numb them. People just choose not to."
Image credits: Ancient-Abs
In fact, this whole branch of medicine has grown out of a rotten trunk. Consider the "father of modern gynecology," James Marion Sims. He developed pioneering tools and surgical techniques related to women's reproductive health. In 1876, he was even named president of the American Medical Association, and in 1880, he became president of the American Gynecological Society, an organization he helped found. The 19th-century physician has been lionized with a half-dozen statues around the US.
But Sims conducted his research on enslaved Black women without anesthesia, and medical ethicists as well as historians claim that his use of medical test subjects falls into a long, ethically bereft history that includes the Tuskegee syphilis experiment and Henrietta Lacks. According to critics, Sims cared more about the experiments than providing therapeutic treatment, and that he caused unimaginable suffering by operating under the racist notion that Black people did not feel pain.
After going through all the replies under their post, u/Ancient-Abs took away that "if we want to change this, we have to write the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology in order to have them require doctors and doctors in training to numb these areas before procedures." If you want to stay on this topic, keep an eye out for a letter template the Redditor will draft that people can sign and send to this group.
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#1
I started bleeding when pregnant with my first and went to see my OBGYN at the hospital. She looked and said there were polyps on my cervix. She then told me to just hold the nurse's hand and pick a spot on the ceiling, and she’ll cut them out real quick.
I honestly never thought to ask for any kind of pain meds for any procedure like this before. WTF is wrong with me and other women? We’ve been so brainwashed to believe that 'it’s just a pinch' and now drive home and go make dinner.
I’m a medical professional and had to read a thread on Reddit to realize I need to advocate for myself, and I don’t need to be in pain during gyno procedures.
#2
When I had my first baby, I was very tiny, and the kiddo was a big, bouncing boy. I got snapped at by the first nurse for making a sound. This was long before maternity pain relief was really a thing. We got gas and pethidine/demerol. Fast forward, my then-husband had his vasectomy done eight weeks after my fourth baby. During 15 hours of labor, I had gas. For the excruciating pain after, I got OTC pain killers. For the raw, cracked bleeding nipples, I was told, 'You know how it goes, they’ll toughen up in a couple of weeks (of breastfeeding).' He was given Valium to take the night before, another one for that morning, and then pain relief for the duration of the five-minute procedure. He was given another script for afterward and told to go easy for a few days.
Are women seen as tough or subhuman?
#3
I argued with a doctor who told me that there would be no pain management for my colposcopy — after I showed up for it. His reasoning was that 'it was only a five- to 10-minute procedure,' and I could have some ibuprofen(!) afterwards. When I told him that vasectomies were a five- to 10-minute procedure, too, but that I bet if he were having one, he'd want some anesthetic for his balls, he straight-up walked out on me.
#4
I had a cervical biopsy when I was 18, and the doctor was like, 'You’ll feel just a pinch.' Then I felt, well, a chunk of my cervix cut out and screamed. He was like, 'Shhh.' So I cried quietly, and he looked up at me and said, 'Why are you crying? There are no nerve endings on the cervix. I know you aren’t actually feeling pain.'
That was literal decades ago. I had hoped things had changed for women since then. Good to hear that old [jerk] doctor is still the norm. Cool. Real cool.
Carol Emory 3 years ago
I would have kicked him in the face and said "Why are you tearing up...there are no nerve endings in your face...."
#5
I had a cervical biopsy as well and I passed out in the elevator afterwards from the pain. It’s really insane and having theses procedures done without any kind of pain management as the norm should not be a thing. I would totally help with any campaign you might want to start!
Cigdem Kanburoğlu 3 years ago
As an anesthesiologist, you do not have to endure pain. In fact, pain management is a quality factor for hospitals. It is a shame in this era to let anyone to feel this kind of discomfort and pain.
#6
I work in a medical office and women pass out all the time after IUD placements. I remember how hot heavy crampy and panicky the insertion was thankfully mine was fast and I didn’t pass out but I felt so weird the whole day and felt shaky. Getting it out was TRAUMATIC. The strings were not outside the cervix so a radiologist did an ultrasound while doctor dug around in my uterus trying to grab the strings and she couldn’t get them and i said stop and my ob didn’t right away so i pushed everyone off me and had a panic attack. Then i had to come back and get a scope to get it out and they gave me a Valium and it was like a walk in the park. Everyone. Should. Get. A. VALIUM.
Missy Moo Moo 3 years ago
I didn't have any Valium during my procedure, but I had some at home and I was in so much pain I couldn't walk. I just laid on the couch staring at the ceiling assessing all the medications I could take to stop the pain, decided on Valium. I told the dr when I went back and got told off because that's not what valium are for. Basically medication for muscle cramping doesn't treat muscle cramps
#7
I had a procedure done a few months ago where they had to tear through my cervix to fill my uterus with fluid — something to do with fertility issues. The pain was unbearable, and I felt violated. I cried so hard and was furious they would let me go through that without any anesthesia or pain reliever.
How is this so normal?
Angela Blackburn 3 years ago
I had this procedure as well to look for issues due to abnormal bleeding. Doc said " this is a breeze- it's like going from normal to 9 mos pregnant in under a minute". When I cried from the pain she says "Ohhh I forgot you've never been pregnant " she couldn't finish the procedure due to the pain I was experiencing.
#8
After having my third kid via C-section, they refused to give me any pain meds except two regular strength Tylenol every few hours. My baby was in the NICU for a few nights, too. So when I wanted to see or hold him, I had to grind my teeth and get there through sheer willpower. However, my husband got put on morphine for kidney stones at this same hospital.
For the record, I wasn't breastfeeding. It was in my chart. So it's not like they were trying to get around accidentally dosing the baby. I'm also not saying my husband's pain wasn't great but that there is a glaringly obvious bias. I filed a complaint, but nothing happened.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
They’ll just paint her like a complaining Karen even though she’s fully right and is experiencing sexism.
#9
I got put under to have wisdom teeth removed, but nothing when I got my IUD put in. I literally screamed when they inserted it.
I've broken bones and have been in less pain.
LaGitanaTriste 3 years ago
I had all 4 wisdom teeth removed in the same procedure, with only Novocain. I was in so much pain, gushing blood from my mouth, literally spit out enough blood to fill a big gulp cup the hour following surgery. I had to drive myself home. It they gave my vics for the pain afterwards so that was fun.
#10
I got a LEEP procedure, and that was more painful than drug-free childbirth. I can feel my cervix descend before my period and I can feel the penis on my cervix during sex. Still, the doctor told me I shouldn’t feel anything. I had no sexual desire for months after the LEEP, and I talked to a lot of women who had the same procedure and some said they’re like that after years, or they feel pain or bleed during sex.
Why are they so set on 'the cervix has no pain receptors?'
Susie Elle 3 years ago
The person who claims the cervix has no pain receptors obviously has never had a penis inside of them at slightly the wrong angle during sex before.
#11
Five years ago, I had my first IUD inserted. I lucked out with a physician who insisted on the local anesthetic for insertion and made me lay on the exam table for 30 minutes afterward for monitoring. They've moved on to another state so I had to find a new physician for my replacement IUD. When I scheduled the replacement, I specifically asked for the anesthetic, and they stated they would make sure it was prepped for me. When I got there for the appointment, they told me that the anesthetic was not prepared and it would 'take longer to prep and numb you than to just insert the new device.' Already strained, I buckled and allowed them to do removal and replacement without the anesthetic. It was agonizing. I complained with the office manager and asked to have my physician changed, but I was bullied out of that, too.
I had first asked after tubal ligation instead of an IUD and — though my physician was a woman, and I'm 37 with a 17-year-old child and no interest in more children — I got so bullied by her that I settled for another IUD. I'm autistic, so it's incredibly hard for me to initiate care in the first place, and it's harder to stand up for myself. It sucks.
When I went for the ultrasound follow-up two weeks after the replacement, the tech laughed and said, 'They placed the IUD too low.' When I asked what that meant, she said I'd have to talk to the doctor. Sobbing and horrified that I might have to go through this s**t a second time, I demanded a doctor look at the images there-and-then. A much younger doctor examined my images and gave me the OK after advising that while the placement was lower than was common, my particular IUD doesn't come with as long of an insertion rod. She explained that so long as the device was not in the cervix, and I was not bleeding or cramping or the device was expelled, I was protected. I hope to f**k she's right, but as soon as I get past the trauma of the whole affair, I'm finding a new GYN and getting a second opinion.
Women are discriminated against to a revolting degree; disabled women are abused outright. It's easy for people who are not me to say things like, 'You should have said no,' but I'm inherently conflict-averse and anxious to the point of nausea at pushing back against authority figures, especially doctors. It's really hard to self-advocate when you're on the spectrum, and most people are confused about what that means.
Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago
Can you always bring someone with you to an appointment like that to help advocate with you?
#12
Because healthcare for women is in dire need of innovation compared to other areas of medicine. It has been normalized for women to endure pain, trauma and discomfort during normal gynecological procedures for way too long. It isn’t necessary and needs to change.
LaGitanaTriste 3 years ago
I remember when my gyn said, “ we’ll see about your self-proclaimed endometriosis.” And I clapped back so fast that it is certainly not self proclaimed, it’s diagnosed. Didn’t you read my chart? Don’t you have record from my previous doctor? She was much more polite afterwards
#13
I had both an HSG and a saline ultrasound. I have high pain tolerance, and I was sweating profusely and extremely nauseous. I have never needed a few minutes before getting up, but I did that time — and that was with 800 mg taken beforehand that I learned I should take from the internet, not my doctor, who never said a word about needing pain medication.
I am absolutely blown away that a doctor can do that procedure hundreds of times a year — see hundreds of women crying, sweating, writhing in pain, and passing out from pain — yet no form of anesthesia is ever offered.
It’s f**king cruelty. They literally push a tube through your cervix. Why would they ever think this would be ok to do without pain control?
#14
The problem is that no one has ever cared about women’s pain, so women never complained. Since women never complained—because it wouldn’t do any good anyway—men think women have it easy. The medical field has always ignored women and continues to ignore women. There is a total lack of respect around the world for what women and girls go through. Kind of off topic, but I mostly get angry when I think about how it must have been for women throughout history. Can you imagine your village is being attacked and you’re in the middle of giving birth or you’re pregnant? How about a nice long carriage ride discovering the west with your husband. You have your period, you feel like s**t, but you don’t want to be a negative person on this trip. I’ve read so many history books about the things women dealt with, and honestly, we haven’t progressed that much when it comes to female care. It’s not right…
Jo Choto 3 years ago
The entirety of every single piece of medicine is founded upon using men as the baseline, which is why women's heart attacks are missed, why diagnosis of ADD and autism are missed in girls/women, why ob/gyn stuff is completely dismissed and often improperly and insufficiently taught. And don't get me started on how medicine affects people of color...
#15
I had a LEEP procedure fully awake. I remember I started shaking, and the doctor got on to me. It was a horrible experience. It frustrates me. We can get pain medicine for removals of moles, but [screw] your cervix.
That was just one of the many things they should have not have done.
Brandy Grote 3 years ago
What. I had a LEAP surgery, and was fully under in the late 80s. Of course, they DID take out more than 1/4 of it. Ugh.
#16
I recently had an endometrial (uterine) biopsy. The doctor told me it would hurt, but it would be over in ten seconds. I started counting out loud, 'One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three...' then I started screaming. After, I was crying and hyperventilating. The doctor told me my reaction was normal.
It was so painful that I can't really tell you how it was painful. My brain just won't go there. Years ago, I had, had cold cauterization done on my cervix — twice. Again, no pain meds. That was bad. The endometrial biopsy was worse.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Screaming and suffering aren’t normal in a world with pain management medicine. They may be the norm but that isn’t normal.
#17
When I was 18, my gynecologist's office apparently forgot to tell me to take extra strength ibuprofen before my cervical biopsy — that's the recommendation they use. I got the same 'just a pinch' spiel, and they decided it was worth it to just go ahead and do it anyway. (Surely, they had some ibuprofen they could've given me.) The sample the doc took got stuck, and he was yanking on it while it was still attached. The nurse who was with him had to grab and hold my leg because she saw I was about to kick him in the head.
I had done eight years of Tae Kwon Do at that point. I would have made an ass of myself. If doctors really think it doesn't hurt, perhaps they should just shut up and deal with however we choose to express our clearly fake pain.
Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago
No, you wouldn't have made an ass of yourself. You'd have taught him a lesson he'd never forget.
#18
A close friend of mine was actually the nurse that inserted my iud. I bled everywhere and almost fainted/puked. She gave me a juice box and helped my bf walk me to my car, and he had to pull over several times because I kept thinking I had to puke and I cried in pain the entire way home.
If numbing was an option I'd definitely have f**king taken it.
#19
I had a polyp removed from my cervix. They told me I'd have some cramping and that I'd be ok. I walked out of there straight to the bathroom and almost fainted. My mom looked for me for 15 minutes until she started knocking on the door. I was able to get up and walk out. Everyone was super concerned, but no pain medicine or post-care. Nothing.
I could have busted my head on the sink locked in the bathroom.
Adrienne Wallage-Benson 3 years ago
I also had a cervical polyp removed with no anaesthesia. The procedure hurt like f**king hell. The male gyne had said it would only hurt "like a period cramp." I was so stunned afterwards I couldn't even describe the pain to my husband. Like someone else said, I also felt violated
#20
The last time I had an endometrial biopsy attempted on me – my third one, my first two were done successfully but painfully — I could not handle it and asked to doctor to stop. I had to ask her again to stop because she ignored my first try. She became visibly agitated and started slamming things around the room, ripping her gloves off and mumbling that this was a waste of her time.
This was nearly 10 years ago, and I have not been to a gynecologist since. Not only did she hurt me, but she also shamed me for being intolerant to the pain.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
What a creepy crybaby loser. “But I WANTED to pick at pieces of your vulva! And now you won’t let me! Pout.”
#21
My hysteroscopy hurt so badly that they had to call extra people to hold me down on the table. I was screaming for help and ended up kicking my doctor in the face and breaking his nose — on accident of course, but honestly, he deserved it. He was literally torturing me and all he cared about was completing the procedure at any cost. I bled and was sore for nearly a month.
Something was very, very wrong with what he did, but I could never tell you what. I cannot believe they do that procedure without sedation.
Libstak 3 years ago
Are you kidding me? That's a major procedure requiring complete sedation. There is internal stitching to be done and they are removing your uterus which is firmly attached to your cervix, the also need to remove your fallopian tubes. I was completely under and not allowed to move the next day. I was also given a 6 week recovery period requiring absolutely no weight lifting and short moderate walks. I had to inject myself every day for 20 days to prevent blood clots due to being expected to lay prone far significant amounts of time. Where I the check are hysterectomies being done without anesthesia?
#22
Just the other week, I had a vulvar biopsy on the very delicate, sensitive tissue on the inner part of my vulva. My gynecologist assured me that I wouldn’t feel a thing after she injected some local anesthetic. Well, that clown f**ked up the anesthetic, because I felt EVERYTHING. It was horrible. I literally had tears pouring out of my squeezed-shut eyes as I threw my hand over my mouth and stifled a scream. She said, 'Oh, you felt that? You weren’t supposed to feel that!' Then, she kept going — gouging into my delicate bits with her medieval tool — and I kept crying and shaking. She then commented to the nurse, 'Oh, she must be nervous.' It took me a few hours to stop shaking due to the intense pain put my body in such a panic mode.
I had a few panic attacks for the next three days, kept obsessively thinking about the procedure, and would just randomly start crying. Don't Google what a vulvar biopsy is if you're squeamish.
Elizabeth Anderson 3 years ago
"She must be nervous" is so dismissive. What a hysterical woman.
#23
I had a cervical biopsy done. I am a candidate for endometrial ablation, and my insurance company required the biopsy. I didn’t know it was going to happen until 30 seconds after my ultrasound. My OBGYN requested that I take my mask off (COVID) to 'help with breathing' because it was going to hurt so much. I put my hands behind my head since I didn’t know what to do with them. I have what I consider to be a very high pain tolerance. During the procedure — I didn’t even realize I was doing it — I used my own nails to cut into the top of my other hand. The nurse actually had to bandage my hand before I left.
I now have four U-shaped scars on the top of my hand. That was six months ago, and I haven’t scheduled my ablation because that situation [messed] me up in the head.
Wendy Heath 3 years ago
I had an endometrial ablation in the UK, I didn't feel a thing because I had a general anaesthetic. When you consider the unbelievable charges levied against patients in the US, why are American women not demanding better care, you should stand together and fight against these terrible practices, anyone would think it's 1821 not 2021. Oh and I had to fight for the procedure, I did that by banging on the doctors desk and shouting at him, that I would not give in to what he thought I should have, (a hysterectomy) I wanted an endometrial ablation and that's what I got. Fight for better care ladies.
#24
I’ve had two babies. Both babies it was impossible for me to dilate. I’m talking days to weeks of contractions and early labor.
When I got an IUD I threw up and passed out on the table. Dilating your cervix to insert an IUD is not just “pinch” for a lot of women.
Sheila Stamey 3 years ago (edited)
Let me equate this to something, so the men can understand. When a man takes a solid kick to the groin, they tend to fall down, lose breath ,cry and puke, sad they rightfully should. Now, if they had the choice of getting anesthesia before that, I'm sure they would take it.
#25
The worst pain I ever experienced was an IUD insertion, I'll never forget it.
It was so bad I almost told them to stop. I ended getting it removed, the constant hormones just didn't agree with my body.
White Paper Tsuru 3 years ago
Was supposed to get an hormone based IUD for dysmenorrhea, in the doctors office with no anesthetic, sedation, local pain control. I have a repeated history of severe exacerbation of depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation related to birth control hormone therapy. I also have a chronic neurological pain condition called vulvadynia where literally even the lightest touch of the vaginal opening causes 10/10 burning, writhing pain. (Pap smears are an annual torture session requiring anti-anxiety meds to reduce the pain and terror) having a local anesthetic DIRECTLY INJECTED didn't alter the pain sensation. I did not get the hormonal IUD. Doctor was like, well, whatever. I mean it's your choice.
#26
I had a cystoscopy with no pain meds, and it was so [frigging] traumatizing. There I am, sitting and acting like everything’s okay and like it wasn’t the worst pain in the world. After, I go home and have to pee. I went into the shower to relax my body, and I couldn't [frigging] pee. The pain was insane. I sobbed for hours. They ended up prescribing something extra to help, but in the end, that single event of trying to pee left me so traumatized. It hurt to pee for a week. The initial shock, sitting there awake while they do it, and the, 'You may feel slight discomfort after' — after shoving a metal rod thicker than a pencil in my urethra — and I was trying to figure out why my bladder is so sensitive.
I hate doctors so much.
Stephanie IV 3 years ago
Happened to me. Couldn’t speak for hours. Just sat and rocked back and forth.
#27
The worst is that since I’ve been an adult I’ve only had female gynos and they’ve ALL dismissed my pain. A colposcopy almost caused me to pass out. I thought I temporarily died during my iud insertion. I AM EXTRA SENSITIVE DOWN THERE. Why don’t they take it seriously? They act as though I’m dramatic or an anomaly. But obviously I (and all of us here) am not.
BRING ON THE PAINKILLERS I SAY!
Sarah Tate 3 years ago
Yeah, the worst gynos I've had have been women. I finally ended up with a male doctor who is amazing and actually takes me seriously. I spent years suffering because those women told me I was "just being dramatic" or "that's just the way you are and you have to deal with it". It turns out I was riddled with endometriosis and fibroids. I don't want kids, but I couldn't have them anyway if I did because all that junk destroyed my tubes. It took almost 10 years to get a diagnosis and surgery to fix me. I'm still angry as hell about it even though I'm fine now and have been for a long time.
#28
I hadn't had any other form of birth control and got an IUD placed. I had asked my doctor before the appointment if it was okay to drive myself home, and if there were any pain meds I could get. She told me all I would need was over-the-counter stuff. I nearly passed out during the insert from the pain. Once my head stopped spinning, I very carefully got myself to my car and started to drive home. It was incredibly painful. Our roads are s**t here, and every single bump I hit had me screaming in pain while trying to keep focus. I made it home and basically couldn't leave my bed for two days.
Moral of the story, no, it's NOT okay to be told you can drive yourself home after your first IUD placement.
It's also completely ridiculous that we are given no numbing or pain meds for a procedure that puts a foreign object in the most sensitive part of our bodies. Our bodies literally fight back against it being there.
Wendy Heath 3 years ago
In the UK, if a doctor behaved like this they would face malpractice charges.
#29
When I had a cervical biopsy they put me in “twilight sleep”. Or basically conscious sedation. I wasn’t totally unconscious but I wasn’t awake either. Had to have someone with me to make sure I got home. This was done through my local (US-Georgia) health department as I’m uninsured. Cost was negligible. They said they always offered the conscious sedation but many opted not to per the cost. I don’t understand why that is not always an option for gyno procedures. I’m assuming it’s a time/personel issue. And I guess as women we aren’t worth the cost of time or personel.
pusheen buttercup 3 years ago
It makes me sick that not being tortured is charged extra. How dare they- how dare anyone?
#30
I had no idea to expect pain for my colonoscopy. I thought that because they weren't numbing anything, it must not be bad. I started crying and screaming, and I couldn't keep my legs open. They ended up only doing a partial biopsy because I went hypotensive (blood pressure dropped). It angers me to this day.
I have also had three IUDs, and my blood pressure tanks from the pain every time. I have to be monitored.
What do you think ?
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
OK, I'm calmer. Ish. WHY DO WE BELIEVE THERE ARE NO PAIN RECEPTORS IN THE CERVIX? All caps to get attention, not yelling per se. .... When I was a med student, the teachers explained that if a cervix had pain receptors, women would not enjoy sex, nor survive childbirth, as the cervix has to dilate, etc. So, since women didn't die of pain, obviously the cervix has no pain receptors. This was debunked so often in the last century, and yet it persists, b/c some paleolithic idiot decided "Her cervix dilating didn't kill her, must not have pain receptors". That's truly the essential thinking behind this attitude.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
Absolutely awful what these women and many others have gone through. Things need to change now to stop all this unnecessary pain. My heart goes out to all women who have suffered.
LaGitanaTriste 3 years ago
I had to stop reading. We are being raped by doctors in the guise of medical care.
Evil Little Thing 3 years ago
In my life I've have had a colposcopy, cervical biopsy, surgical abortion, emergency C-section, IUD, and 5 years later IUD out, and the only time I was given anything stronger than ibuprofen was during (not after) my C-section. All that s**t hurt like crazy. Comparatively, a few years ago I spent some time in the ER getting IV antibiotics for a kidney infection (from a stone I passed a couple weeks later) and I had to fight to NOT be given opioids. Oh yeah, then a few weeks later the stone was stuck in my bladder and I had a drug-free cystoscopy, but because the Dr couldn't find the stone because of all the inflammation, he decided it had come out and I didn't notice. His medical assistant suggested that instead of pain I was actually getting anxiety attacks. It came out a year later and I definitely noticed because it was 5mm long and 4mm wide. I was tempted to mail it to that asshole urologist and his asshole medical assistant.
Hannah Edwards 3 years ago
I went to the Dr to have a coil fitted. It was excruciating. She’d pushed it through into my bowel. It took months of hospital visits, where I was treated like an hysterical woman and disbelieved. I was reassured that it was fine and was working as a contraceptive. I passed it after about three months of bleeding, diarrhoea and pain. By then I was pregnant.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Woman. Got my MD and can avow, yes, it's insane how women are disregarded. We're also not taught on female cadavers. Males dominate even in the dead room. *sigh* It's insane. I've had biopsies without anesthesia. Hubby gets a mole off, he's given it. I'm just told, hold my breath. Sure. You scrape off my cervix, I'll just *hold my breath*.... Yeah. "Is taht duct blocked"? For a man, it's numbed and probed gently. For a woman's breast, it's "let's squeeze and see what happens!" ARGH. Don't start me on how they don't treat endometriosis....
Lovin' Life 3 years ago
I had anesthesia when having my hysterectomy but woke up mid-procedure. I wasn't given anything else to put me back to sleep. I felt everything and was out of it due to pain for 3 days. No reason for not giving anything more. Doctor said it wasn't necessary. Nothing for pain afterwards either. Just Ativan for the anxiety. Pushing out my babies was easier than my hysterectomy.
JP 3 years ago
I have become a royal b***h when it comes to advocating for my own healthcare. I have no problem getting up and walking out if I don't like what the doctor is saying/doing. I make sure I'm informed as much as possible before a procedure and will insist on pain management. If I get push-back, I leave. And it absolutely sad and wrong I have to be this way to just be treated like an equal human being. Hubby had a prostrate biopsy, with pain management. When they wanted to do a cervical biopsy they wanted to do it without pain meds. I had to walk out and find another doctor to do the procedure. Added 8 weeks to the timeline. Thankfully it wasn't cancer, but if it had been that 8 weeks could have been the difference between beating or succumbing to cancer.
MyOpinionHasBeenServed 3 years ago
I'm always asked "Have you had a baby before? Well, then this shouldn't be that painful." As I'm screaming in agony getting an IV 5 times without anesthetics cos they couldn't find the vein and that was their big issue the whole time I was in the hospital with a chest infection and high fever. They wanted me to have an IV cos I was dehydrated. I was asking for water for 4 hours.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
It’s so trashy honestly. Doctors like that should feel janky and substandard. And those of us women who have the ability to speak up or demand access, should do so any chance we get.
Susie Elle 3 years ago
I wanted to get an IUD inserted but my doctor couldn't get it into my cervix. The pain was unbearable, I nearly passed out right there and almost threw up on the busride home. I have IBS, so I'm familiar with hard pains but man, that was something new entirely. I felt it everywhere.
your socially awkward cousin 3 years ago
reading all these makes me incredibly afraid to go to a GYN when im 16, it makes me scared that they're gonna tell a literal child to "hold your breath". i may have a high pain tolerance, but it aint that high..
Anne 3 years ago
Yep. A lot has to change still. Also - most medicine is tested on (mostly white) males - because of pregnancy risks. That also has to change.
J. Normal 3 years ago
I always had a male gyno. My reasoning was when I went to a woman once her first comment when inserting an IUD and I said it hurt. was " This does not hurt, quit it". At that point I figured going to a man... he would not "know" so he would believe me. It worked for the 20yrs I had to go. Although there was no understanding when another "doctor" told me not to treat my cancer and continue to have babies for my husband. He actually said I would probably be able to have at least 2 (before I died).
Nandina 3 years ago
Ever notice how your husband/ SO will react if you get a cold, have a pain somewhere or just any form of physical upset? It goes like this, " Oh, I feel sick too, ....My (fill in the blank) hurts too ....I'm getting a cold too" I keep all my pains and ailments to myself to avoid hearing how insignificant I am to be alive. ( born in the 50s)
Martin Kaine 3 years ago
Isn't "Do No Harm" still a thing? I'm no doctor, but if I was going to do something inside the human body, I'd like to think I'd find out about and implement pain management for the procedure. I'd start by talking to the patient.
Tracy Wallick 3 years ago
Trying to get an IUD was so excruciatingly painful and traumatic, it left me with a crippling phobia of the "lady doctor". The doctor told me to take an ibuprofen beforehand; no amount of OTC painkillers would have made it any more bearable.
Deb Cashion 3 years ago
When I was pregnant with my son I needed an amniocentesis as I was over 32 and my blood work came back suspicious. I was alone as my military husband had been posted two weeks earlier, just after I had lost a twin to my son in a miscarriage. The pain was excruciating (large needle into the womb to take fluid) and when I moaned the male doctor said "yes I know". I snapped back "how, do you have a uterus?". There was no talk after that. People assume that women can handle it, but it's because we have been made to. I went back to work that day in pain and then went home to look after my 4 year old and a farm full of animals. My hubby had a week off after his vasectomy and got painkillers and the male doctor wrote a "script" saying I needed to be nice to him. BUgger that.
Thomas Hiette 3 years ago
As the lone male in our home, I've heard similar stories from my family. Wife had a great obgyn, now daughters are seeing the obgyn's daughters daughter who followed her mom's example. We are luckier than most
Charl Marx 3 years ago (edited)
I had a very traumatic childbirth experience and my daughter was sent to NICU at first so I didn't get to see her. On the recovery ward the next day they wanted me to get straight up an showered. I could barely move still the pain was horrific, but they insisted I had to leave recovery, I literally crawled to the shower dripping blood everywhere I stepped, and nearly passed out on the floor. They kept denying me strong pain killers even though I decided I didn't want to breastfeed! Such a horrible experience.
Jo Choto 3 years ago
I am profoundly upset and disturbed by these stories. Having anybody medically delve around your private parts is a stressful, difficult and unpleasant experience, and can easily leave you feeling traumatized and violated. The idea that in this day and age, women are still being tortured, literally, without a care for their pain or suffering, or the psychological damage that is done, it's unspeakable. Thanks to all you amazing women for talking about this and educating us.
Toni Alabakovski 3 years ago
I had the HGT test where they inject dye into the uterus & fallopian tubes, I’m thinking they gave me valium or vicodin for that. I had the essure permanent birth control procedure done, which is where they insert springs into your fallopian tubes and was told I could take up to 800 mg of ibuprofen, I asked if they could prescribe something stronger and they said unfortunately no, they couldn’t. I asked if it was okay if I took a valium or vicodin if I had any at home and they replied very nicely that yes, I could, and explained when I should take it. Normally no one could go into the procedure room with you, but I got lucky and they let my hubby go in with me. That helped me a lot, I was glad he was there to hold my hand thru the pain and to see the procedure (we could see it all on a screen)
Cameron Mireille 3 years ago
I had an ovarian cyst rupture at 16. I was sobbing with pain the whole day, finally went to ER. I was gushing blood and saturating those puppy pads they put under you. They gave me no pain meds and left me with a full catheterized bladder for THREE HOURS before doing the ultrasound. Confirmed an ovarian cyst and told me to just go home and take Tylenol. I suspect they thought I was having a miscarriage and were trying to "punish" me for premarital sex or something. This was a large hospital in Chicago suburbs over a decade ago.
LadyDez 3 years ago
Yeah I had no pain relief offered delivering my child when epidural completely failed. They sewed up third degree tear with no anesthetic. They gave me Naprosyn after for pain. They talked me into an IUD which was absolute torture with no offer of any sedative, numbing, nothing. Then the damn thing failed and fell out after 14 months. Oh, do you want to replace it? Eff you and your IUD doc!
Jeweled Dragon 3 years ago
I am a 16 year old girl and now I am terrified of what the future holds in terms of medical care. For the record I have an extraordinarily low tolerance for pain. You can bet if I am told that I won't be getting anesthetic for any of these procedures I will kick someone in the face, just like I did to my dentist for not giving me pain medication for oral surgery when I was 11.
Zaza 3 years ago (edited)
My first 2 implanons (a hormone stick placed between the muscles in the upper arm, a form of birth control) were inserted without any numbing agent, I didn't even know you could get any until I got the third from a different doctor who offered local anesthesia. And while giving birth to my 1st I was in a lot of pain, not just from labor, but my knees and hips hurt like crazy. I was in desperate need to be in a different position, but wasn't allowed to move at all. They physically restrained my legs for several hours, resulting in chronic pain and difficulty walking for the rest of my life. Had to get some stitches afterwards, when I told the doc something was wrong and it really hurt. I was told "that's impossible, you're just imagining it". Almost 2 decades (and another birth) later and it still hurts regularly, but yea, sure, that's all in my head because I'm just a dumb female. That you can literally feel the thick, almost pea sized, knot like scars when you probe my vajayjay walls (walls?) must be in my head too. And don't get me started on the countless times I was told things were "hormonal" when in hindsight I was really physically ill, oh and the dentist who did a root canal without anestesia and yelled at me when I cried. The list goes on and on and on and on. And that's just me and I haven't even been the worst off
David Mowbray 3 years ago
I wonder if Doctors were to treat men that way though I do have to add that pain can be quite subjective, and not all pain is the same for everyone, that said if it hurts shout, scream and don't be afraid to grab their hand and stop them, got to say though that there have been many times in my life where I've been subjected to horrible levels of pain and more than once been told to man up, but these days if you're having a procedure where pain is involved it is very easy not to stop the pain, yes it takes longer and it's more paperwork for them but tell them firmly that the pain is too much, you cannot prevent some discomfort but if the pain is too much tell them and never forget it's your body!
alithenewmc 9 months ago
I've dealt with vaginismus for years and have seen 5 gynos about it- the way they tried to treat it, you'd think they'd never heard about it. It got better (not fully "normal", but better) after I stopped talking to drs and instead went to therapy and a pelvic physio. When we had our kids, I decided to stay far away from the OBs and went with midwives instead, who were fantastic. I have to have ativan just to get into the room for a pap (thankfully, my family dr- an old man in his 80s who you'd expect to be set in his ways- is very well read and understanding). The midwives and my dr always make sure to tell any ultrasound tech that I'm not to get a transvaginal at any point, though I always have to reiterate it several times. My thing is...where is the innovation? They can put cameras on pin heads, but to do a transvaginal ultrasound, they need to use something the size of a dildo? They need to open you right up for a pap?
Archair Smith 3 years ago
This is why I don't trust doctors. Apparently 270,000 deaths a year caused by medical failures. Also you can die from stress. There gonna end up killing someone
David Struve 3 years ago
As a 37-year-old guy who has had quite a lot of procedures done over the years, including biopsies and a recent colonoscopy and had full general anasthetic or sedation for each of them offered before I even asked .... I can't even imagine .... from the posts I managed to get through (I too, couldn't get through them all, I feel physically sick) .... I .... have no words... This isn't modern medicine, this is medieval torture!! WHAT THE ACTUAL ...
Susan Henning 3 years ago
I saw my neighbor, from Uzbekistan, through her pregnancy (long story). When she went into labor, it was a total s**t show. Apparently, being a woman, foreign, unable to speak the language, meant that she couldn't feel pain. I'm a very polite, nice chick, but I went beyond nuclear. Cold savagery and a lawyer on the phone got the head of obstetrics and his nurses. Aziza was healthy, and Matluba was treated like a queen. But why, why did it have to go that far?
Monica Pryts 3 years ago
Yup. I was definitely lied to about how much an endometrial biopsy would hurt. F*****g nightmare.
square coats 3 years ago
My doctor told me before I got my IUD put in it was probably going to hurt a lot because of where it would be located. I can't even remember what it was like because I just went into shock. All I remember is as if I was floating above myself and her saying in surprise something like "I can't believe you aren't crying and screaming right now" and me mumbling back "I'm just holding my breath and not thinking about it". I'm pretty sure I managed to fully dissociate from what my body was experiencing, lucky me I guess. My doctor also told me "what a cute little cervix you have" (gee thanks?) and that I should probably never become pregnant because of how painful it was. I guess I'm also lucky I had already decided years prior that if I ever decided to raise a child I would adopt, but I can only imagine the emotional pain on top of the physical pain if that hadn't been the case.
Milla Leino 3 years ago (edited)
-Trigger warning- A few years ago, when i had an abortion (for a man that i had been seeing just 7 weeks, i was on the pill too, i was in active addiction so didn't think i had another choice, been clean for over 2 years now) no one really talked to me about anything that was gonna happen, then had me in a room, alone, for two days, they brought me a bucket and told to only use that when i had to go to the bathroom. As traumatizing as it was already, no one came to talk to me but the nurse who stuffed the pills in my vagina every 4 hours, until the stuff started come out. It was so painful, and scary, i couldnt have any visitors, and i squeezed the stuff out, all alone, not gonna go into that. They gave me ibuprofen for the pain only. When the nurse came to check on me when i informed that the thing came out, she came in to the room, checked, an told me "you made the real choice, you would not be fit to have a baby". So more emotional to me, but the pain was so horrible.
NoDramaPartyLlama 3 years ago
I have endometriosis. I've been in ever increasing agony since I was 10 years old (now 29). It took me 15 years and dozens of doctors before anyone listened. Why did they finally listen? Because I had massive bilateral kidney stones, a partially blocked kidney, and a raging UTI and kidney infection that I ignored FOR 3 DAYS because I thought it was my period. My periods really are that painful. It wasn't until I realized I was peeing blood and feverish that I went to the ER. Where I then had an agonising gynecological exam to prove I really was peeing blood bc they thought I couldn't tell period blood from peeing blood. Treated me horribly until they took x-rays. Had to wait a month for surgery to remove them. When I related that story to my newest GYN at 25 bc she said periods weren't painful I swear she peed herself. Whether it was the story or my finally snapping she referred me elsewhere and I finally got help. It's disgusting how womens pain is treated.
David Dwyer 3 years ago
How could you make your life so low as to f**k with other people's lives and scam them and possibly even ruin their lives... F**k u
Brandy Grote 3 years ago
I get medical care at the VA. After cervical cancer, sometimes I have a bad or unreadable Pap test, so they do a "procedure". They go up the cervix and into the uterus to get samples. Great except I have scar tissue in my cervix from my LEAP surgery. I had it in clinic ONE TIME. They were tearing the scar tissue, I was bleeding, it was nearly as bad as some of the earlier treatments because my cervix DOESN'T DILATE. So now they send me to the big hospital and knock me out completely to do these "mega Paps". Because I would kill or die due to that pain.
B 3 years ago
31 years ago I was pregnant with my son & was at the dr they had the scapula in checking to see if I was dilated I said I'm going to throw up the dr said you are fine just relax, I said I'm going to throw up he said it will just be a minute. I started to throw up very muscle contracted flinging the scapula across the room & hit the wall. I said I TOLD YOU I was going to throw up he left the room & let the nurse deal with helping me
Briana Kessler 3 years ago
Last year, it took 5 months and 4 ER visits before I got emergency surgery for an ovarian cyst which ended up taking MUCH longer than expected due to complications . I now will go batsh1t crazy if I'm ignored. I'm not doing that again.
Aubrie Allen 3 years ago
I had a hysterectomy and my doctor would only let me have Motrin. I had a major organ removed and got Motrin. I hated that doctor.
Little Wonder 3 years ago
My god. I was so lucky - I had an IUD inserted under general anaesthetic, while they were doing a biopsy. There was a woman in the waiting room saying her last IUD had gone in at the local GP's office and she'd vomited from the pain. I dodged a hell of a bullet there.
Okiedokie 3 years ago
A friend of mine was developing a hernia during her pregnancy [umbilical] and persistently told her doctor it hurt quite badly and she was sure it was a hernia but he kept insisting it wasn’t until it couldn’t be denied anymore [about 7 months in]. Apparently the conversation went somewhat like ‘look, I really really think it’s a hernia’ to be told ‘oh, no it’s not’, which eventually switched to an absolutely unsympathetic ‘oh, well, yes it does look like a hernia.’ After that they did no follow-ups or referrals for her to get it treated surgically. It didn’t go away once her baby was born and she still has it to this day because she can’t afford the procedure. Her daughter is three now.
Denise Melek 3 years ago
After one asshole-doctor told me it "would only pinch a bit" and I nearly kicked his face during him trying to get it in, I changed doctors and get a short anaesthesia.
Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago (edited)
Speaking as a retired nurse, after reading all of this I just want to scream, so I will. GD IT !!! WHAT IN HELL IS WRONG WITH THE MEDICAL/NURSING PROFESSION THAT THEY TREAT WOMEN THIS WAY!! NO CARING, NO EMPATHY, NO TREATING YOU LIKE A HUMAN BEING WHO HAS THE RIGHT TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT AND DIGNITY!! EVERYTHING I HAVE HEARD HERE IS ABUSIVE IN SOME WAY. Yes, some of these people deserve to be sued. That takes a long time, and they have insurance for that. What will really get their attention is to report them to their governing body. Yep docs protect docs, but in the meantime, the investigation is hellish. Get a new doc. The very first appointment basically interview them. How do they practice. If I were to have "X" procedure, how is it handled. I know it's extremely painful. Will I get pain control during the procedure. Always for everything for any docs, questions, questions, questions. If it pisses them off that you're doing that, then they're not someone you want near you.
Lord Mysticlaw 3 years ago
After reading all of that I'm just really really really grateful that I have a very healthy reproductive system that needs minimal medical attention, and no plans of ever getting an IUD.
Vanessa Flores 3 years ago
I couldn’t even finish reading these. This is absolutely disgusting.
Sinead Engel 3 years ago
I had a surgical cervical biopsy at 17 without anaesthesia and in all honesty it was less uncomfortable than a smear test for me. What really, really hurt was two tooth extractions and root canals (because my wisdoms emerged underneath existing teeth, exposed the roots etc) without anaesthesia! Had the other side of my mouth dealt with 2 weeks earlier and the anaesthesia didn’t seem to make a difference to my experience, so for the 2nd appointment my dentist to just go ahead as quick as she could without anaesthesia! Aside from the dental stuff… I am mother of 4, and at no point have the midwives believed my account of pain. All 4 delivered with just gas & air except for my first when I had pethidine injection, but she was a quick birth, my first, big baby etc
DC 3 years ago
Opioides are broadly available nowadays. Hell, they even think they're used too much (which I disagree to - they're used wrong, often, but that's elsewhat). When I go to the dentist for something more severe, I make sure to have 3 tabs of 10 mg Diazepam (Valium) on me, of which I take 2 planned (when getting into the subway, the first, when getting called into the room, the second), No. 3 is to make sure I won't run out of it. Works well for me. I use pain meds anyway, always, so this isn't much of an issue - higher dose, end of. I actually wonder how many people have no clue about this (maltreatment in general goes unnoticed far too often for people not knowing what should happen, what is normal), and therefore endure insuffarable pain. For nothing. It has no warning/avoidance fuction here ... so why? Why not give out at least something making it less shiddy?
deathrose 3 years ago
My sisters' and I noticed a difference in how we reacted to having an IUD inserted. My oldest sister felt a cramp but wasn't bothered, the next oldest cramped and bled heavily, my middle sister felt weird and kinda achy for the first day, the second youngest puked and was cuddled up to a heating pad for the rest of the day and spotted for about a week and a half, I cramped and got a little nauseous from the pain, spotted for 3 days but ultimately I don't feel like it was a bad experience. I guess the 5 of us were lucky.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
OK, I'm calmer. Ish. WHY DO WE BELIEVE THERE ARE NO PAIN RECEPTORS IN THE CERVIX? All caps to get attention, not yelling per se. .... When I was a med student, the teachers explained that if a cervix had pain receptors, women would not enjoy sex, nor survive childbirth, as the cervix has to dilate, etc. So, since women didn't die of pain, obviously the cervix has no pain receptors. This was debunked so often in the last century, and yet it persists, b/c some paleolithic idiot decided "Her cervix dilating didn't kill her, must not have pain receptors". That's truly the essential thinking behind this attitude.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
Absolutely awful what these women and many others have gone through. Things need to change now to stop all this unnecessary pain. My heart goes out to all women who have suffered.
LaGitanaTriste 3 years ago
I had to stop reading. We are being raped by doctors in the guise of medical care.
Evil Little Thing 3 years ago
In my life I've have had a colposcopy, cervical biopsy, surgical abortion, emergency C-section, IUD, and 5 years later IUD out, and the only time I was given anything stronger than ibuprofen was during (not after) my C-section. All that s**t hurt like crazy. Comparatively, a few years ago I spent some time in the ER getting IV antibiotics for a kidney infection (from a stone I passed a couple weeks later) and I had to fight to NOT be given opioids. Oh yeah, then a few weeks later the stone was stuck in my bladder and I had a drug-free cystoscopy, but because the Dr couldn't find the stone because of all the inflammation, he decided it had come out and I didn't notice. His medical assistant suggested that instead of pain I was actually getting anxiety attacks. It came out a year later and I definitely noticed because it was 5mm long and 4mm wide. I was tempted to mail it to that asshole urologist and his asshole medical assistant.
Hannah Edwards 3 years ago
I went to the Dr to have a coil fitted. It was excruciating. She’d pushed it through into my bowel. It took months of hospital visits, where I was treated like an hysterical woman and disbelieved. I was reassured that it was fine and was working as a contraceptive. I passed it after about three months of bleeding, diarrhoea and pain. By then I was pregnant.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Woman. Got my MD and can avow, yes, it's insane how women are disregarded. We're also not taught on female cadavers. Males dominate even in the dead room. *sigh* It's insane. I've had biopsies without anesthesia. Hubby gets a mole off, he's given it. I'm just told, hold my breath. Sure. You scrape off my cervix, I'll just *hold my breath*.... Yeah. "Is taht duct blocked"? For a man, it's numbed and probed gently. For a woman's breast, it's "let's squeeze and see what happens!" ARGH. Don't start me on how they don't treat endometriosis....
Lovin' Life 3 years ago
I had anesthesia when having my hysterectomy but woke up mid-procedure. I wasn't given anything else to put me back to sleep. I felt everything and was out of it due to pain for 3 days. No reason for not giving anything more. Doctor said it wasn't necessary. Nothing for pain afterwards either. Just Ativan for the anxiety. Pushing out my babies was easier than my hysterectomy.
JP 3 years ago
I have become a royal b***h when it comes to advocating for my own healthcare. I have no problem getting up and walking out if I don't like what the doctor is saying/doing. I make sure I'm informed as much as possible before a procedure and will insist on pain management. If I get push-back, I leave. And it absolutely sad and wrong I have to be this way to just be treated like an equal human being. Hubby had a prostrate biopsy, with pain management. When they wanted to do a cervical biopsy they wanted to do it without pain meds. I had to walk out and find another doctor to do the procedure. Added 8 weeks to the timeline. Thankfully it wasn't cancer, but if it had been that 8 weeks could have been the difference between beating or succumbing to cancer.
MyOpinionHasBeenServed 3 years ago
I'm always asked "Have you had a baby before? Well, then this shouldn't be that painful." As I'm screaming in agony getting an IV 5 times without anesthetics cos they couldn't find the vein and that was their big issue the whole time I was in the hospital with a chest infection and high fever. They wanted me to have an IV cos I was dehydrated. I was asking for water for 4 hours.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
It’s so trashy honestly. Doctors like that should feel janky and substandard. And those of us women who have the ability to speak up or demand access, should do so any chance we get.
Susie Elle 3 years ago
I wanted to get an IUD inserted but my doctor couldn't get it into my cervix. The pain was unbearable, I nearly passed out right there and almost threw up on the busride home. I have IBS, so I'm familiar with hard pains but man, that was something new entirely. I felt it everywhere.
your socially awkward cousin 3 years ago
reading all these makes me incredibly afraid to go to a GYN when im 16, it makes me scared that they're gonna tell a literal child to "hold your breath". i may have a high pain tolerance, but it aint that high..
Anne 3 years ago
Yep. A lot has to change still. Also - most medicine is tested on (mostly white) males - because of pregnancy risks. That also has to change.
J. Normal 3 years ago
I always had a male gyno. My reasoning was when I went to a woman once her first comment when inserting an IUD and I said it hurt. was " This does not hurt, quit it". At that point I figured going to a man... he would not "know" so he would believe me. It worked for the 20yrs I had to go. Although there was no understanding when another "doctor" told me not to treat my cancer and continue to have babies for my husband. He actually said I would probably be able to have at least 2 (before I died).
Nandina 3 years ago
Ever notice how your husband/ SO will react if you get a cold, have a pain somewhere or just any form of physical upset? It goes like this, " Oh, I feel sick too, ....My (fill in the blank) hurts too ....I'm getting a cold too" I keep all my pains and ailments to myself to avoid hearing how insignificant I am to be alive. ( born in the 50s)
Martin Kaine 3 years ago
Isn't "Do No Harm" still a thing? I'm no doctor, but if I was going to do something inside the human body, I'd like to think I'd find out about and implement pain management for the procedure. I'd start by talking to the patient.
Tracy Wallick 3 years ago
Trying to get an IUD was so excruciatingly painful and traumatic, it left me with a crippling phobia of the "lady doctor". The doctor told me to take an ibuprofen beforehand; no amount of OTC painkillers would have made it any more bearable.
Deb Cashion 3 years ago
When I was pregnant with my son I needed an amniocentesis as I was over 32 and my blood work came back suspicious. I was alone as my military husband had been posted two weeks earlier, just after I had lost a twin to my son in a miscarriage. The pain was excruciating (large needle into the womb to take fluid) and when I moaned the male doctor said "yes I know". I snapped back "how, do you have a uterus?". There was no talk after that. People assume that women can handle it, but it's because we have been made to. I went back to work that day in pain and then went home to look after my 4 year old and a farm full of animals. My hubby had a week off after his vasectomy and got painkillers and the male doctor wrote a "script" saying I needed to be nice to him. BUgger that.
Thomas Hiette 3 years ago
As the lone male in our home, I've heard similar stories from my family. Wife had a great obgyn, now daughters are seeing the obgyn's daughters daughter who followed her mom's example. We are luckier than most
Charl Marx 3 years ago (edited)
I had a very traumatic childbirth experience and my daughter was sent to NICU at first so I didn't get to see her. On the recovery ward the next day they wanted me to get straight up an showered. I could barely move still the pain was horrific, but they insisted I had to leave recovery, I literally crawled to the shower dripping blood everywhere I stepped, and nearly passed out on the floor. They kept denying me strong pain killers even though I decided I didn't want to breastfeed! Such a horrible experience.
Jo Choto 3 years ago
I am profoundly upset and disturbed by these stories. Having anybody medically delve around your private parts is a stressful, difficult and unpleasant experience, and can easily leave you feeling traumatized and violated. The idea that in this day and age, women are still being tortured, literally, without a care for their pain or suffering, or the psychological damage that is done, it's unspeakable. Thanks to all you amazing women for talking about this and educating us.
Toni Alabakovski 3 years ago
I had the HGT test where they inject dye into the uterus & fallopian tubes, I’m thinking they gave me valium or vicodin for that. I had the essure permanent birth control procedure done, which is where they insert springs into your fallopian tubes and was told I could take up to 800 mg of ibuprofen, I asked if they could prescribe something stronger and they said unfortunately no, they couldn’t. I asked if it was okay if I took a valium or vicodin if I had any at home and they replied very nicely that yes, I could, and explained when I should take it. Normally no one could go into the procedure room with you, but I got lucky and they let my hubby go in with me. That helped me a lot, I was glad he was there to hold my hand thru the pain and to see the procedure (we could see it all on a screen)
Cameron Mireille 3 years ago
I had an ovarian cyst rupture at 16. I was sobbing with pain the whole day, finally went to ER. I was gushing blood and saturating those puppy pads they put under you. They gave me no pain meds and left me with a full catheterized bladder for THREE HOURS before doing the ultrasound. Confirmed an ovarian cyst and told me to just go home and take Tylenol. I suspect they thought I was having a miscarriage and were trying to "punish" me for premarital sex or something. This was a large hospital in Chicago suburbs over a decade ago.
LadyDez 3 years ago
Yeah I had no pain relief offered delivering my child when epidural completely failed. They sewed up third degree tear with no anesthetic. They gave me Naprosyn after for pain. They talked me into an IUD which was absolute torture with no offer of any sedative, numbing, nothing. Then the damn thing failed and fell out after 14 months. Oh, do you want to replace it? Eff you and your IUD doc!
Jeweled Dragon 3 years ago
I am a 16 year old girl and now I am terrified of what the future holds in terms of medical care. For the record I have an extraordinarily low tolerance for pain. You can bet if I am told that I won't be getting anesthetic for any of these procedures I will kick someone in the face, just like I did to my dentist for not giving me pain medication for oral surgery when I was 11.
Zaza 3 years ago (edited)
My first 2 implanons (a hormone stick placed between the muscles in the upper arm, a form of birth control) were inserted without any numbing agent, I didn't even know you could get any until I got the third from a different doctor who offered local anesthesia. And while giving birth to my 1st I was in a lot of pain, not just from labor, but my knees and hips hurt like crazy. I was in desperate need to be in a different position, but wasn't allowed to move at all. They physically restrained my legs for several hours, resulting in chronic pain and difficulty walking for the rest of my life. Had to get some stitches afterwards, when I told the doc something was wrong and it really hurt. I was told "that's impossible, you're just imagining it". Almost 2 decades (and another birth) later and it still hurts regularly, but yea, sure, that's all in my head because I'm just a dumb female. That you can literally feel the thick, almost pea sized, knot like scars when you probe my vajayjay walls (walls?) must be in my head too. And don't get me started on the countless times I was told things were "hormonal" when in hindsight I was really physically ill, oh and the dentist who did a root canal without anestesia and yelled at me when I cried. The list goes on and on and on and on. And that's just me and I haven't even been the worst off
David Mowbray 3 years ago
I wonder if Doctors were to treat men that way though I do have to add that pain can be quite subjective, and not all pain is the same for everyone, that said if it hurts shout, scream and don't be afraid to grab their hand and stop them, got to say though that there have been many times in my life where I've been subjected to horrible levels of pain and more than once been told to man up, but these days if you're having a procedure where pain is involved it is very easy not to stop the pain, yes it takes longer and it's more paperwork for them but tell them firmly that the pain is too much, you cannot prevent some discomfort but if the pain is too much tell them and never forget it's your body!
alithenewmc 9 months ago
I've dealt with vaginismus for years and have seen 5 gynos about it- the way they tried to treat it, you'd think they'd never heard about it. It got better (not fully "normal", but better) after I stopped talking to drs and instead went to therapy and a pelvic physio. When we had our kids, I decided to stay far away from the OBs and went with midwives instead, who were fantastic. I have to have ativan just to get into the room for a pap (thankfully, my family dr- an old man in his 80s who you'd expect to be set in his ways- is very well read and understanding). The midwives and my dr always make sure to tell any ultrasound tech that I'm not to get a transvaginal at any point, though I always have to reiterate it several times. My thing is...where is the innovation? They can put cameras on pin heads, but to do a transvaginal ultrasound, they need to use something the size of a dildo? They need to open you right up for a pap?
Archair Smith 3 years ago
This is why I don't trust doctors. Apparently 270,000 deaths a year caused by medical failures. Also you can die from stress. There gonna end up killing someone
David Struve 3 years ago
As a 37-year-old guy who has had quite a lot of procedures done over the years, including biopsies and a recent colonoscopy and had full general anasthetic or sedation for each of them offered before I even asked .... I can't even imagine .... from the posts I managed to get through (I too, couldn't get through them all, I feel physically sick) .... I .... have no words... This isn't modern medicine, this is medieval torture!! WHAT THE ACTUAL ...
Susan Henning 3 years ago
I saw my neighbor, from Uzbekistan, through her pregnancy (long story). When she went into labor, it was a total s**t show. Apparently, being a woman, foreign, unable to speak the language, meant that she couldn't feel pain. I'm a very polite, nice chick, but I went beyond nuclear. Cold savagery and a lawyer on the phone got the head of obstetrics and his nurses. Aziza was healthy, and Matluba was treated like a queen. But why, why did it have to go that far?
Monica Pryts 3 years ago
Yup. I was definitely lied to about how much an endometrial biopsy would hurt. F*****g nightmare.
square coats 3 years ago
My doctor told me before I got my IUD put in it was probably going to hurt a lot because of where it would be located. I can't even remember what it was like because I just went into shock. All I remember is as if I was floating above myself and her saying in surprise something like "I can't believe you aren't crying and screaming right now" and me mumbling back "I'm just holding my breath and not thinking about it". I'm pretty sure I managed to fully dissociate from what my body was experiencing, lucky me I guess. My doctor also told me "what a cute little cervix you have" (gee thanks?) and that I should probably never become pregnant because of how painful it was. I guess I'm also lucky I had already decided years prior that if I ever decided to raise a child I would adopt, but I can only imagine the emotional pain on top of the physical pain if that hadn't been the case.
Milla Leino 3 years ago (edited)
-Trigger warning- A few years ago, when i had an abortion (for a man that i had been seeing just 7 weeks, i was on the pill too, i was in active addiction so didn't think i had another choice, been clean for over 2 years now) no one really talked to me about anything that was gonna happen, then had me in a room, alone, for two days, they brought me a bucket and told to only use that when i had to go to the bathroom. As traumatizing as it was already, no one came to talk to me but the nurse who stuffed the pills in my vagina every 4 hours, until the stuff started come out. It was so painful, and scary, i couldnt have any visitors, and i squeezed the stuff out, all alone, not gonna go into that. They gave me ibuprofen for the pain only. When the nurse came to check on me when i informed that the thing came out, she came in to the room, checked, an told me "you made the real choice, you would not be fit to have a baby". So more emotional to me, but the pain was so horrible.
NoDramaPartyLlama 3 years ago
I have endometriosis. I've been in ever increasing agony since I was 10 years old (now 29). It took me 15 years and dozens of doctors before anyone listened. Why did they finally listen? Because I had massive bilateral kidney stones, a partially blocked kidney, and a raging UTI and kidney infection that I ignored FOR 3 DAYS because I thought it was my period. My periods really are that painful. It wasn't until I realized I was peeing blood and feverish that I went to the ER. Where I then had an agonising gynecological exam to prove I really was peeing blood bc they thought I couldn't tell period blood from peeing blood. Treated me horribly until they took x-rays. Had to wait a month for surgery to remove them. When I related that story to my newest GYN at 25 bc she said periods weren't painful I swear she peed herself. Whether it was the story or my finally snapping she referred me elsewhere and I finally got help. It's disgusting how womens pain is treated.
David Dwyer 3 years ago
How could you make your life so low as to f**k with other people's lives and scam them and possibly even ruin their lives... F**k u
Brandy Grote 3 years ago
I get medical care at the VA. After cervical cancer, sometimes I have a bad or unreadable Pap test, so they do a "procedure". They go up the cervix and into the uterus to get samples. Great except I have scar tissue in my cervix from my LEAP surgery. I had it in clinic ONE TIME. They were tearing the scar tissue, I was bleeding, it was nearly as bad as some of the earlier treatments because my cervix DOESN'T DILATE. So now they send me to the big hospital and knock me out completely to do these "mega Paps". Because I would kill or die due to that pain.
B 3 years ago
31 years ago I was pregnant with my son & was at the dr they had the scapula in checking to see if I was dilated I said I'm going to throw up the dr said you are fine just relax, I said I'm going to throw up he said it will just be a minute. I started to throw up very muscle contracted flinging the scapula across the room & hit the wall. I said I TOLD YOU I was going to throw up he left the room & let the nurse deal with helping me
Briana Kessler 3 years ago
Last year, it took 5 months and 4 ER visits before I got emergency surgery for an ovarian cyst which ended up taking MUCH longer than expected due to complications . I now will go batsh1t crazy if I'm ignored. I'm not doing that again.
Aubrie Allen 3 years ago
I had a hysterectomy and my doctor would only let me have Motrin. I had a major organ removed and got Motrin. I hated that doctor.
Little Wonder 3 years ago
My god. I was so lucky - I had an IUD inserted under general anaesthetic, while they were doing a biopsy. There was a woman in the waiting room saying her last IUD had gone in at the local GP's office and she'd vomited from the pain. I dodged a hell of a bullet there.
Okiedokie 3 years ago
A friend of mine was developing a hernia during her pregnancy [umbilical] and persistently told her doctor it hurt quite badly and she was sure it was a hernia but he kept insisting it wasn’t until it couldn’t be denied anymore [about 7 months in]. Apparently the conversation went somewhat like ‘look, I really really think it’s a hernia’ to be told ‘oh, no it’s not’, which eventually switched to an absolutely unsympathetic ‘oh, well, yes it does look like a hernia.’ After that they did no follow-ups or referrals for her to get it treated surgically. It didn’t go away once her baby was born and she still has it to this day because she can’t afford the procedure. Her daughter is three now.
Denise Melek 3 years ago
After one asshole-doctor told me it "would only pinch a bit" and I nearly kicked his face during him trying to get it in, I changed doctors and get a short anaesthesia.
Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago (edited)
Speaking as a retired nurse, after reading all of this I just want to scream, so I will. GD IT !!! WHAT IN HELL IS WRONG WITH THE MEDICAL/NURSING PROFESSION THAT THEY TREAT WOMEN THIS WAY!! NO CARING, NO EMPATHY, NO TREATING YOU LIKE A HUMAN BEING WHO HAS THE RIGHT TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT AND DIGNITY!! EVERYTHING I HAVE HEARD HERE IS ABUSIVE IN SOME WAY. Yes, some of these people deserve to be sued. That takes a long time, and they have insurance for that. What will really get their attention is to report them to their governing body. Yep docs protect docs, but in the meantime, the investigation is hellish. Get a new doc. The very first appointment basically interview them. How do they practice. If I were to have "X" procedure, how is it handled. I know it's extremely painful. Will I get pain control during the procedure. Always for everything for any docs, questions, questions, questions. If it pisses them off that you're doing that, then they're not someone you want near you.
Lord Mysticlaw 3 years ago
After reading all of that I'm just really really really grateful that I have a very healthy reproductive system that needs minimal medical attention, and no plans of ever getting an IUD.
Vanessa Flores 3 years ago
I couldn’t even finish reading these. This is absolutely disgusting.
Sinead Engel 3 years ago
I had a surgical cervical biopsy at 17 without anaesthesia and in all honesty it was less uncomfortable than a smear test for me. What really, really hurt was two tooth extractions and root canals (because my wisdoms emerged underneath existing teeth, exposed the roots etc) without anaesthesia! Had the other side of my mouth dealt with 2 weeks earlier and the anaesthesia didn’t seem to make a difference to my experience, so for the 2nd appointment my dentist to just go ahead as quick as she could without anaesthesia! Aside from the dental stuff… I am mother of 4, and at no point have the midwives believed my account of pain. All 4 delivered with just gas & air except for my first when I had pethidine injection, but she was a quick birth, my first, big baby etc
DC 3 years ago
Opioides are broadly available nowadays. Hell, they even think they're used too much (which I disagree to - they're used wrong, often, but that's elsewhat). When I go to the dentist for something more severe, I make sure to have 3 tabs of 10 mg Diazepam (Valium) on me, of which I take 2 planned (when getting into the subway, the first, when getting called into the room, the second), No. 3 is to make sure I won't run out of it. Works well for me. I use pain meds anyway, always, so this isn't much of an issue - higher dose, end of. I actually wonder how many people have no clue about this (maltreatment in general goes unnoticed far too often for people not knowing what should happen, what is normal), and therefore endure insuffarable pain. For nothing. It has no warning/avoidance fuction here ... so why? Why not give out at least something making it less shiddy?
deathrose 3 years ago
My sisters' and I noticed a difference in how we reacted to having an IUD inserted. My oldest sister felt a cramp but wasn't bothered, the next oldest cramped and bled heavily, my middle sister felt weird and kinda achy for the first day, the second youngest puked and was cuddled up to a heating pad for the rest of the day and spotted for about a week and a half, I cramped and got a little nauseous from the pain, spotted for 3 days but ultimately I don't feel like it was a bad experience. I guess the 5 of us were lucky.
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