“AITA For Breaking Up With My Partner After They Won Big And Kept It All?”
“For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.” That’s a part of the traditional wedding vows, which should, in theory, mean people are willing to be with each other because of their love for one another and not anything else.
However, as one Redditor recently shared, it was not the death but the riches that tore their relationship apart. While they were not yet married, things were going great until their partner won big gambling. Once the money came in and the poster wanted to have a small celebration on their winnings, their partner declared that it was their winning, and so was the money. Scroll down to read the full story!
More info: Reddit
Money can change people, and, unfortunately, some have to learn this the hard way
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk (not the actual photo)
A person supported their partner’s gambling hobby and even pitched in with money, as they thought it was a fun thing to do
Image credits: Gustavo Fring (not the actual photo)
After winning big, the person suggested doing something together to celebrate it but was shocked when their partner wasn’t willing to share
Image credits: u/drinnlovayq
The person felt that this was a major red flag for their future and decided to end the relationship, only to be called a gold digger by their partner and their friends
The OP began by sharing that they and their partner had a deal where the OP would pitch in some money for what they called their partner’s “gambling hobby.” The author viewed it as a fun, supportive thing to do and didn’t think much more of it.
But the time came when the poster’s partner won a significant sum. At first, the person was happy for their significant other and suggested celebrating it together, but they were soon shocked when their partner replied, “My win, my money.”
Seeing as no talking helped the situation, the OP took it as a red flag for their future and decided to part ways. This upset their partner even more and led to them and their friends and family calling the poster a gold digger.
Words were of no help, once again. With everyone around them being so set against them, the person began doubting themselves and came to look for vindication online.
People in the comments section were completely on the OP’s side. They bashed their partner and their friends for saying what they did, compared their ex to Gollum, and said that the ex will most likely go broke pretty soon, as they probably don’t realize that the sum they won is not as much as it seems.
Image credits: Keira Burton (not the actual photo)
Most people believe that money can solve most of their problems. And while they might not be wrong when talking about existing obstacles, many of them fail to account for the very real possibility that money can create a whole new arsenal of different problems for them to deal with, especially if the riches come to them suddenly.
As Chelsea Clarke of the HerPaperRoute wrote, the road to becoming rich is usually paved with effort, determination, and sacrifice. However, if the person just gains the money all of a sudden, they likely won’t realize what it takes and might very well take it for granted without having developed these traits.
This can affect their way of thinking about themselves, making them feel special and better than those around them. Eventually, this can further impact their relationships with other people, who may not favor these negative changes.
Moreover, money has the power to shift the moral compass of a lot of people, which can not only change how they treat others but can also bring out more negative character traits of that person, like greed, envy, and paranoia.
Image credits: Javon Swaby (not the actual photo)
The most important point, however, is that most of these things are not only based on anecdotal evidence, and, as Carolyn Gregoire of the Greater Good magazine wrote, there are a few studies that prove this.
According to research published in the journal Psychological Science, there is a clear difference in empathy and compassion between the rich and those of lower economic status. A good example of this is that poorer people are better at reading facial expressions due to being forced to be more naturally dependent on others than the rich.
Further, other studies, such as the one done at UC Berkeley, show that people driving more luxury cars were less likely to obey traffic rules. At the same time, researchers at the University of Utah and Harvard discovered that the mere thought of money could negatively impact people’s behavior.
And that is not the end of it. There are plenty of other studies showing that being rich can be linked to having more addictions and that money itself can become one just as well. And the worst part is that children of wealthy people tend to also grow up with more problems and cause more trouble, creating a closed circle.
But we shouldn’t paint money as evil because, just like anything else, it’s not really inherently a good or a bad thing. In the end, it all really depends on us, on who we are and how we behave. There sure are factors that come with becoming rich, especially if that happens suddenly, but it seems unlikely that something like that could create anything that wasn’t there to begin with.
So, perhaps the OP’s partner was always this greedy, and it’s just that the money finally brought it to light. But whether that was the case or not, it feels like the poster made the right move because if your significant other holds you as less important than some lottery winnings, this might be just the beginning of the red flags.
What did you think about this story? How would you have acted in the poster’s place? Tell us all about it in the comments below!
The commenters wholeheartedly supported the poster, saying that the only jerk in this story was their partner, who will most likely go broke soon anyway
You didn't walk away because of money but because of what you learned about the other person. Their loss.
You didn't walk away because of money but because of what you learned about the other person. Their loss.
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