Woman Accommodates Parents To Help Out, They Invite Her Pregnant Sister To Live With Them
Everyone who has ever lived alone and fended for themselves will tell you it’s no walk in the park. Have you seen the furniture prices? But we still keep moving forward; after all, what other options are there?
However, things get entirely different when family comes into your space and acts like they own it. This Redditor experienced this firsthand. After her parents moved in, her pregnant sister barged in with a doozy of a request: not only did she want to stay, but she also expected the Redditor to babyproof the entire house for her upcoming arrival.
More info: Reddit
Moving into your own place is liberating, but what happens when your space feels less like yours?
Image credits: Jordan Bauer (not the actual photo)
The author allowed her parents to move in with her to help them out
Image credits: Brina Blum (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Jordan Bauer (not the actual photo)
However, the poster’s pregnant sister moved into town and her parents agreed to let her stay with them
Credit: u/Independent-Box-44
Now, they want to babyproof the entire house, including the author’s corner of the house, which has caused friction
The Original Poster (OP) finds herself at odds with her family members over the use of her own home. The author allows her parents to live in the in-law suite of her house, paying a below-market rate for rent. However, a recent development has caused a rift within the family.
The OP’s pregnant sister is facing a difficult situation after her partner left her. Without consulting their daughter, the author’s parents offered their in-law suite as temporary housing for the sister and her children. This decision has sparked conflict, as the homeowner is hesitant to have young children running freely throughout the house. She expressed concerns about childproofing her personal space and the potential for an unlicensed daycare operation on the premises.
While the OP agrees to help her family, she maintains that her own living space needs to remain a child-free zone. Her mother, on the other hand, believes it’s unfair to restrict the children to the basement and argues for utilizing the backyard and sunroom as play areas. The homeowner’s sister further complicates the situation by revealing plans to watch a friend’s toddler for money, raising insurance concerns for the homeowner.
She has since taken back the keys and changed the locks. While her father understands her position, her mother remains upset by the decision.
Image credits: Maria Ziegler (not the actual photo)
One reader weighed in with a strong stance, arguing that the homeowner should reconsider the entire living arrangement. They expressed concern that the situation would escalate, with her space eventually being overrun. “NTA but you may have to reconsider this whole arrangement. You know over time this will become a mess for you. Your mum, sister and kids will take over your space and it will be very hard to rectify after they are here. Ask your parents to move out , although I feel sorry for your dad.”
As noted by BetterHelp, “It can be challenging to set boundaries with family and those you care about deeply. However, doing so has many benefits, such as improved relationships, increased confidence, and more effective communication. You may set many types of boundaries, such as those regarding time, physical touch, arguments, emotions, intellect, social media, diet, finances, and communication.”
In this case, the homeowner is setting boundaries around several aspects of her life. She’s establishing a physical boundary by reclaiming control of her living space. She’s also setting financial boundaries by refusing to allow childcare on her property without proper insurance coverage. Finally, she’s setting emotional boundaries by prioritizing her own comfort and well-being.
Setting boundaries is not about being cruel; it’s about protecting your personal space and well-being in the face of an encroaching situation. The author’s decision to regain control by reclaiming her keys and changing the locks might be seen as harsh by some. However, it’s a necessary step to prevent her home from being gradually controlled by the needs and demands of others.
So, what do you guys think? Was the homeowner being a jerk, or was she right to set boundaries? Let’s hear it in the comments!
Commenters supported the poster’s decision
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Drama Ensues When Family Discovers All Their IQ's Are Below Room Temperature
Drama escalates when irresponsible sister discovers she didn’t pass primary school education.
Load More Replies...So babysitting one child doesn't usually require a day care license. Of course different countries, cities and states have different laws, but in the several places I've lived, one child or children from the same family can be watched, even regularly without a license. Once it becomes more than an agreement between two families, that changes. But update the lease, make it clear it is the tenants' responsibility to ensure any business activities are insured and legal. Also ensure changes to the yard and building need landlord approval. These are standard, you can find example leases online. Get the sister on a list for social housing, it can take years, so get on the list ASAP. Make sure she signs up for WIC or child payments or whatever relevant benefits there are.
Yes, the idea this is a business is overblown. More to the point sister is irresponsible at the get go. The lies, the expectation that sibling home owner has to child proof their personal space..who is paying for that btw? I'm betting it's not pregnant sister. The shared food due to cart Blanche main kitchen access. I'm all about kids being fed but having a 3rd party dictate who has access to my fridge is just no.
Load More Replies...OP is going to get stuck with an unlicensed, uninsured daycare, and be stuck watching the children.
According to a comment, OP already had a change of heart and changed the locks, no daycare :)
Load More Replies...Drama Ensues When Family Discovers All Their IQ's Are Below Room Temperature
Drama escalates when irresponsible sister discovers she didn’t pass primary school education.
Load More Replies...So babysitting one child doesn't usually require a day care license. Of course different countries, cities and states have different laws, but in the several places I've lived, one child or children from the same family can be watched, even regularly without a license. Once it becomes more than an agreement between two families, that changes. But update the lease, make it clear it is the tenants' responsibility to ensure any business activities are insured and legal. Also ensure changes to the yard and building need landlord approval. These are standard, you can find example leases online. Get the sister on a list for social housing, it can take years, so get on the list ASAP. Make sure she signs up for WIC or child payments or whatever relevant benefits there are.
Yes, the idea this is a business is overblown. More to the point sister is irresponsible at the get go. The lies, the expectation that sibling home owner has to child proof their personal space..who is paying for that btw? I'm betting it's not pregnant sister. The shared food due to cart Blanche main kitchen access. I'm all about kids being fed but having a 3rd party dictate who has access to my fridge is just no.
Load More Replies...OP is going to get stuck with an unlicensed, uninsured daycare, and be stuck watching the children.
According to a comment, OP already had a change of heart and changed the locks, no daycare :)
Load More Replies...
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