Don’t judge a book by its cover, especially when it comes to people you don’t know. Their looks might not give away certain things that matter and making assumptions can be detrimental.

Redditor u/PigeonLoverAkane shared how a woman scolded her for not giving up her bus seat. The “Karen” based her demands on the fact that the passenger looked healthy, when she was actually in a lot of pain. Scroll down for the full story in the OP’s own words.

Making assumptions about people’s health can have detrimental effects

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

This woman was scolded by a “Karen” for not giving up her bus seat even thought she “looked healthy”

Image credits: Dobrila Vignjevic (not the actual photo)

Image credits: PigeonLoverAkane

The thought that young people are healthier is a common but not an always correct assumption

Making assumptions can seriously offend or hurt someone as you never know what the other person is going through; especially if it’s someone you don’t personally know. But research suggests that we tend to make assumptions about the features of everything around us, both things and people.

Clinical psychologist Jennifer Guttman pointed out that individuals might make assumptions because of impatience to resolve certain situations. “In haste, people mentally make inferences without adequate supporting evidence. These inferences and conclusions may be negative or catastrophic, but people draw them in order to feel the situation is resolved.”

The “Karen” on the bus wanted to resolve a certain situation by getting the redditor’s seat, by making assumptions that the latter was healthy and didn’t need to sit as much as she did. The woman didn’t budge even after the OP informed her that she is indeed not healthy and emphasized that “young people can be ill too”.

It’s arguably not the first, nor the last time when a visually healthy-looking person with an illness has had to deal with a similar situation. And in instances like that, not all of them might be equally enthusiastic about explaining their conditions in great detail just to prove that someone’s assumptions are not correct. That’s why it’s important to raise awareness about so-called hidden or invisible disabilities.

Image credits: Edward Jenner (not the actual photo)

A person can indicate having a hidden illness by wearing a sunflower lanyard

According to the Invisible Disability Association, “an invisible disability is a physical, mental or neurological condition that is not visible from the outside, yet can limit or challenge a person’s movements, senses, or activities”. Also known as hidden disabilities, they include different sorts of conditions, such as autism, dyspraxia, vertigo, Crohn’s disease, cancer, asthma, chronic fatigue syndrome, and others.

To avoid situations like the one the OP encountered and to receive assistance if needed, people with invisible disabilities might wear a sunflower lanyard—an internationally recognized symbol indicating a hidden disability. The Hidden Disabilities Sunflower company pointed out that one in six people globally has a disability, and 80% of them—more than a billion individuals—live with a non-visible one.

The idea of the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower as a global symbol for non-visible disabilities was born at Gatwick Airport in England back in 2016, when the Airport Passenger Advisory Group engaged in discussions with representatives from the Alzheimer’s Society, Visualise Training and Consultancy ltd, the National Autistic Society, and Autism Support Crawley. They chose a green lanyard with sunflowers “to reflect the idea of confidence, growth and strength, as well as introducing happiness and positivity”.

Not every person with hidden disabilities might choose to wear the sunflower lanyard, so you might not know that someone nearby is dealing with an illness or certain difficulties. However, when they state that they have an illness, as the OP did to the “Karen” on the bus, there should be no space left for any assumptions.

Image credits: Senado Federal (not the actual photo)

People in the comments shared their thoughts, some have had encountered similar situations themselves

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