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In a 2018 Times opinion essay 'The Boys Are Not All Right,' American actor, comedian, and writer Michael Ian Black wrote: "The past 50 years have redefined what it means to be female in America. Girls today are told that they can do anything, be anyone. They've absorbed the message: They're outperforming boys in school at every level. But it isn't just about performance. To be a girl today is to be the beneficiary of decades of conversation about the complexities of womanhood, its many forms and expressions."

"Boys, though, have been left behind. No commensurate movement has emerged to help them navigate toward a full expression of their gender. It's no longer enough to 'be a man' — we no longer even know what that means."

Also, surveys from around the world find that males everywhere are reluctant to talk about their mental health and are far more likely to die by suicide than females.

Interested in the everyday implications of this, Reddit user Workdncsheets posted a question on the platform, asking "What are some things that are normal to men but mind-blowing to women?" and it immediately went viral. Here are some of the most popular replies among the 2.8K comments they've received.

#1

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men I'm 39. I started down an entirely new career path in mid-January. I've had horrible imposter syndrome since day 1 but the new job feels good. My boss (who happens to be a woman) sent me the nicest most complimentary email thanking me for being such a good addition to the team and I sincerely cried because in all my years in the workforce nobody has ever appreciated me so much. I imagine to her it was just one of those things a good boss does - "hey, my employee did a good job, I should tell them!" I sent it to my dad when he asked me how the new job was going. Even HE cried out of pride. Men don't get compliments, and when we do, we really feel it.

GWindborn , Tom Pumford Report

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Doctor Strange
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men don't get compliments. I can remember the last time I got an unsolicited compliment on my looks. I remember it clear as day. I was 6 years old. I'm 40 now.

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#2

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Two guy friends could spend the afternoon together, have a grand time, come home, and have their respective wives be absolutely bewildered that they didn’t learn anything about what’s going on in the other guy's life.

cen-texan , Tyler Nix Report

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#3

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men The first time my wife showered with me she stops and says “it’s moving! Are you doing that? Why is it moving?” That was when I realized, if you don’t have a dong, you don’t know that they can move around as your testicles move, nor do you know that testicles move around all the time on their own. Particularly in an environment where the temperature is getting either hot or cold, like a shower. Balls move and balls itch. It’s what they do. And d***s have a mind of their own. Don’t ask me why it’s hard, I’ve been asking it that since I hit puberty.

DeaddyRuxpin , Carson Masterson Report

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ninjaTrashPandaBoom
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Every boy has an embarrassing story or two of getting an erection at the worst possible time. Mine was doing a math problem at the chalkboard in class, BOING, guess who just woke up and decided to say hi to the world!

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#4

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Had a meetup with the boys for hours. not a single photo was taken.

mastersyx , Ashkan Forouzani Report

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Rocky Wheelwright
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish everyone did this. Living your life through taking photos isn’t healthy. Be in the moment, don’t worry about your phone.

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#5

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Being single means no physical contact for extended periods. Or just me. I haven't been hugged in over 4 years. The last time I touched someone else was a handshake 5 months ago.

ridethroughlife , Kevin Lee Report

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Multa Nocte
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One of the things I love about living in France is all the bisous (kisses) that we (male and female) give and get in daily interactions.

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#6

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Being treated as a danger regardless of what you do.

MarsNirgal , Roan Lavery Report

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Jason
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is sadly true. I've always been good with kids. I love mine. I just feel mega awkward and judged if I interact in public with them. Had moms give me a hard time when I am at the playground with my son even.

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#7

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men My wife continually asks me 'did anyone say anything about your shirt/hair/shoes/etc?'

No, no one says anything about my appearance.

lollerkeet , Victor Larracuente Report

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Jason
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My concern is to verify I am infact wearing pants and usually shoes before leaving the house and I'm good.

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#8

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men As a woman I can say something that blows my mind constantly about men is being able to leave the house with no bag. Just like keys and wallet in pockets. 0 inventory. Wild to me.

cinnamonbutterfly , Mathias Reding Report

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Kathy Richardson
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am a 59 year old woman and I discovered years ago the only thing I need is my wallet. Still have purses, just never use them.

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#9

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men From what I am constantly told - the size of our standard pants pockets is mind-blowing.

supermodern , SHVETS production Report

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Jason
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wear the dad cargo shorts. Need all the edc stuff and kids stuff.

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#10

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Long car rides with another dude, nobody says anything and nobody is mad.

zenzealot , RDNE Stock project Report

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LaserBrain
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not always necessary to fill the quiet spaces with words. Some people don't understand that.

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#11

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Men just naturally have a level of strength that surprises women. Testosterone is a hell of a d**g.

For example: my wife has been going to the gym for a while now. She's noticeably stronger now and it's awesome for her. I actually commented and complimented it the other night. But me, a dumpy 45 year old man whose exercise is walking and carrying groceries, I'm still stronger than her just because I'm a guy.

cbftw , Victor Freitas Report

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VOTE if you live in the USA
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a female weightlifter, this annoys and astonishes me to no end! Dudes are just strong. It's amazing.

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#12

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Erection =\= Aroused.

It boggles their mind that just cause a guy gets hard doesn’t mean he is ready to go. Sometimes it just…happens.

PastPriority-771 , cottonbro studio Report

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Dirk Daring
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also we're not always ready to pop a rod at the drop of a hat. We're not actually ready for intimate relations 100% of the time. I had a girlfriend who took it very personally and would get angry when I simply wasn't in the mood. It felt very demeaning to me.

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#13

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men My friends who I haven't seen in YEARS went camping with me recently for four days. I got back and my wife asked me what's been going on in their lives. I pondered and said that I don't really know beyond some got married at some point, one had a kid but I don't know when, and that we mainly talked random stuff. One night we had ended up making a tier list of dipping sauces over three hours.

dBoyHail , Xue Guangjian Report

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Cosmikid
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Old friends get-together? 1st up; we want to remember old times, and what we were then. Recent stuff; may come up; but it's not why we're here. Yeah, women are different here.

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#14

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men In general (the men I know), discussing a partners body or intimate relationship details would be crossing a line and is at best weird, and at worst a betrayal.

Classic-Economy2273 , Seven 7 Report

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Vada
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men (and women) I have known do quite the opposite. So this guy knows some decent people.

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#15

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Having to suppress emotional responses, anxiety, depression otherwise being considered a loser, weak and worthless.

Fine-Geologist-695 , Alex Green Report

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GettingCereal
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is this why so many men don't talk about their private lives with their friends? :-(

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#16

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men We clean off s**t stuck to the inside of the toilet bowl when we p**s. It ain’t much but it’s honest work.

Outrageous-Mail-1267 , Jean van der Meulen Report

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BoredPossum
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep, universally used. It's like catching a ghost with a proton pack, you aim with the beam. But don't cross the beams.

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#17

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men I don't remember the birthday of my best friend of 12 years. i just know its in January.

Coolstashio , lil artsy Report

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Dark Pearl
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

what is even the point of male friendships? none of you clearly know anything about each other and it seems to me that these connections aren't truly meaningful. I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just genuinely confused

Crep 105
Community Member
2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The point is to just exist in each other's company and not be enemies. Friendships are really THAT simple for men.

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Trophy Husband
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know the birthdays of my wife's and kids, though if you ask me for one kid's birthday, I'll take a minute because I'm running through them in my head in order. I do know one friend's birthday because it's the day before mine. My mom and my best friend of about 30 years are September 12 and 19, but I never remember which is which. I remember 1 sister because it's near mine, but not the other. My dad's is in July. I don't know any others. However, my wife knows them all and tells me when I need to email someone, send a card, etc

Justin Tyme
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know any of my friend's birthdays. I don't even know the month.

StopAndDiscover
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't remember which is which with my dad and sister's birthday (i'm a woman) because they are literally side by side, literally consecutive days. I can't remember which one comes first.....

maka paka
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My girlfriend does not understand who the only 2 birthdays i know are my kids and my ex wives, and i only know my exes because it was drilled into me every year

Sven Horlemann
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No no, I am not committing to a month. I think... June. I said, I think. Nothing but an educated guess.

john G
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know MOST Birthdays for important people in my life, and I try never to forget to acknowledge one. I do just wish they did the same but sadly, they don't. But, it makes me feel good as a person to acknowledge others birthdays.

john G
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because if. You care about another, you acknowledge their special days. And not JUST birthdays, Anniversaries, Christmas, Etc. But YES, I AM a Sensitive, CARING guy.

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Certainly not Dan
Community Member
7 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife asked me if I’d sent my friend a birthday card. I’ve known him for 30 years and I know the month and that’s it. If I sent him a card he’d think something was up, or I was taking the p**s

Roland Nijveld
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a man and even know birthdays from kids in elementary school 30 years ago

Roland Nijveld
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But my dad once almost forgot his own birthday so there might be some truth in it

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InfiniteZeek
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no clue when my best friend's birthday is. I have known him for 35 plus years (yes I'm old) we are childhood friends.

Roland Nijveld
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To me, as a man, I can't comprehend this. Like you never went to his birthday?

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Paul Navarrete
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents' birthdays are within 3 weeks of mine. I have 3 dozen other close family members who I love dearly and I have no clue when their birthdays are. I think I was ruined by having the two most important birthdays so close to mine. It is as if I was trained by accident to only think about birthday dates during that small window of time.

Jill Rhodry
Community Member
7 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

keyboardtek
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

After my wife turn 50, she did not want to even be reminded of her birthday anymore. Those days she is generally depressed at getting old.

Lem Johnson
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This isn't a man thing, this is a döuchebäg thing. My husband remembers birthdays and anniversaries every time. If you can't be bothered to put a calendar note for the birthday of someone you care about, you're not a very good friend/partner.

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#18

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men The expectation to help in certain situations, especially as a big guy.

I went to retirement party for a person I never met before (invited by a friend). Literally minutes after I showed up, some random lady came up to me and *told* me to come with her because she needed something carried somewhere.

After I helped the woman above, I remember my (female) friend was kinda surprised that this woman just demanded I help her, without knowing who I was at all. I don't mind helping. On some level it's nice (?) knowing that I look strong enough to help people do things they physically can't. But this happens ALL. THE. TIME. Which also surprised her.

bigguy14433 , RDNE Stock project Report

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PHOTOBOB
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't count the number of times I have helped women in stores reach things because I am tall. Just the other day in the grocery store a woman said "excuse me...". I looked and just said "the blue one?". She was surprised that I did not mind helping. Lady. You would not believe how many times I have done this.

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#19

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men That we don’t socialize/talk/bond with other guys in the bathroom.

No talking in the bathroom. You go in, take care of business, wash your hands, and get out.

No standing next to another dude at the urinal unless you have no choice.

Women’s behavior in the bathroom is considerably different than men’s behavior, or so I’ve been told.

FbxCycler , Lany-Jade Mondou Report

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Jason
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The dude code of urinal selection is a thing, but I've always had people talk to me while using them.

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#20

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men My female friends don’t roast each other like I do with my friends. It’s all in good fun, but I can’t joke with them like I do with my male friends.

SorryWorldliness5296 , Lisa Fotios Report

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Indosidius
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a man, I noticed that women can be...... sensitive..... about roasting. They take it very personal. So I don't roast them. Then they complain that I am different with them than with my male friends. So I roast them, then they get all offended and tell me to not be so personal. I think women are doing it to unbalance men, and I will die on this hill

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#21

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men How much stress some of us feel trying to be providers.

Which probably isn't mind-blowing to single mothers.

xubax , cottonbro studio Report

#22

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Apparently just thinking of ”nothing”. Total zoning out.

ahjteam , Cody Doherty Report

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Cosmikid
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also not gender; but individual. Wide variance on this one. "Zoning" is not generally harmful- in fact people study how to do it - Zen, you know.

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#23

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men The complete f*****g mystery that is flirting.


The anxiety of approaching someone you're interested in and making the first move. Straight women act like it's nothing but I have known Bi women who get as anxious as any man who approaches a woman.


Getting kicked in the balls.


Knowing that when you shake hands with another man that when he squeezes your hand he is sizing you up. Deciding whether or not he could take you in a fight.


Understanding that being told "be yourself" is the equivalent for women of "he'll like you for your personality".


If you see a woman, let's say at work, openly crying she may be having anything from a tough day to having suffered a serious personal loss. Where as if you see a man doing this at work he's probably 6 minutes from s*****e. Not having the freedom to cry is so worked into the concept of manhood that most men can't even when they want to.

MartialBob , Katerina Holmes Report

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BoredPossum
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree with everything except the handshake. A handshake tells me if the person is nice, trustworthy, considering himself above, below or equal to me, and if he is an a$$hat or not.

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#24

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men My wife didn’t realize she’d been seeing this for years in various guys until she asked me what it was. I call it the “Howdy Pardner” - when you realize one or both of the twins is stuck to your leg so you kinda haunch out like a cowboy walking with his spurs on for just a split second and everything unsticks.

baltinerdist , Мария Волк Report

#25

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men How disposable we feel. Like Chris Rock said, "Only women, children, and puppies are loved unconditionally ".

RepresentativeDog141 , Nik Shuliahin Report

#26

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Mainly mind blowing to my wife.
When something in the house breaks, needs repairing, repainting, generally attended to. I don't have an automatic man signal straight to my brain that tells me what to do.
I have to go away, watch YouTube videos, read methods, roam around B&Q for a solution. It takes failed attempts and roaming around the offending situation cursing to myself when no one around untill I either fix it. Or call another male via form of payment to fix it because I'm out of my depth.
My wife is under the impression her role is to identify something is wrong and just hand it to me because I will "know what to do".

Portman88 , Theme Photos Report

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Helena
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am flummoxed by this one. Men and women in my family do repairs of all the things. I've helped aunts rewire a light, helped mom cut up a tree, and helped granpa buid a shelf.

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#27

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Struggling to do something in public and no one coming over to assist you.

i-need-blinker-fluid , charlesdeluvio Report

#28

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Living in an apartment with a tv and no furniture. Lol!!!

Afrochemist , andrewwkfan69 Report

#29

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Saying that you are or being sad and being completely ignored. Getting zero likes on social media for a post.

serene_brutality , Inzmam Khan Report

#30

30 Things That Are Unimaginable For Women, Yet Are Absolutely Normal For Men Going a long period of time without sex or a relationship. For some reason, women think it's easy for men to find someone. They think there is someone out there that would do it or we can just pull women at will.

genogano , Mika Baumeister Report

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Ace
Community Member
7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since I was very young I've always believed that women could get a man any time they wanted to (Jealous? Yes). I know it's not true, but it astonishes me to learn that some women would think the opposite, like this suggests.

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