320 lbs is big enough that it will legit start causing problems if it hasn't already, but the aunt was and has been WAY out of line about how she's handled it. Belittling someone is NOT the way to make them change. It's going to put them on the fast track to depression. You know what'll happen then? More eating. Because they're depressed and don't care about anything now. Support and encouragement would go WAY further.

She took the gift the way she did due to the historic cruelty. Yes the wording and cash wasn't actually too bad but there's a lifetime of mean jokes behind it. However, her parents are TA as it sounds like she's been overweight her whole life and up until a certain age that is 100% the parents fault. It is their responsibility to teach the child about food choices, moderation and provide their meals. Yes, after a certain they have much less input but they should have provided the foundation of a healthy relationship with food.

The issue isn't whether or not she needs to lose weight. The issue is whether or not the aunt was being cruel and whether or not she was rude to refuse the gift, period. The aunt was absolutely wrong and, it sounds like, has been wrong this girls entire life. Not only was well within her rights to refuse the gift, her parents should have supported her. All of this is regardless of her weight. Someone being overweight is not an excuse to be mean to them. I thought this was BeingAGoodHuman 101 but I guess not.

Well to be frank,320lbs is a lot for a young lady. sounds likes parents have given up and relying on the the aunt to say something because shes the only one that always has

I don't care how much you weigh. The aunt was wrong and so rude.

Just want to point out that her question was about whether she was an AH to refuse the gift, not if she should be ashamed of how much she weighs. Her aunt was out of line. Period.

When someone hurts you, they don't get to decide how much. Neither does anyone else.

The sheer number of responses here further fat shaming this OP is astonishing. Do you seriously think she doesn't KNOW she needs to do something? Do you seriously think YOUR criticism is going to help? Get real. This is about her, and only her. She will either find her happiness, or find her solution. It will come from her and her alone....after she overcomes such criticism from those supposed to love her, and from those of you here that continue the abuse. OP, I know your pain, I lived your pain my entire life and I am now 63 and still 330 lbs. I only wish we could chat. I have an understanding that I bet very few people really have. I wish you well, and I hope you can find happiness. Happiness as you are , or in losing weight. You are enough, you are worthy and your body is but a vessel for the lovely soul that you are.

No one making comments about OP has any clue about her medical history, her blood panels, her hormone levels, etc. Doesn't sound like her parents cared very much either. Chances are, they're overweight too. And it absolutely DOES NOT MATTER what the cause of her weight is, no one should be fat-shaming and cruel, especially her toxic aunt. For those saying YTA because she's fat, F**K OFF. Guaranteed you are all not perfect little human beings either. And for the ones saying "it's okay to harass people about smoking or drinking if it helps them stop their filthy habits", NO it is not acceptable either. Learn to mind your own business when it's someone else's body. Check yourselves; you are all judgemental a******s.

for many of us overweight, no amount of dieting and exercise will get us where we need to be. Look at the old episodes of The Biggest Loser and see how many of them lost all the weight. We can't afford to go on all-organic fancy diets too. American food is just riddled with horrible things that get stored up in your body. And for a lot of us, there is now insulin resistance and even a lot of us don't have the appropriate hormone triggers to tell your brain that you're full. And now that there are some meds that many help, they're so incredibly expensive and insurance won't cover them! Doesn't matter that our weight will cause issues down the line that will cost more! They want us to suffer. Most of us aren't gluttens. We just have other issues. But that's America for you - They think we deserve to be punished when we're not perfect because we obviously did something wrong to deserve it.

Having struggled with weight issues all my life (I'm 72 and still struggling), I found it particularly UNHELPFUL to have anyone's advice when not asked for it. I am finally not ashamed of how I look. 60 years of self-loathing and bullying from family members. I wasted SO MUCH of my life being afraid to live. Horrible gift idea from the aunt. By all means, return the money (with the card) or donate the money to a charity of your choice.

Please ignore your rude family and focus on your mental and physical health. Healthy options at the table and a lovely walk in nature or city park make me happy. Find what makes you happy.

This poor woman has been bullied her whole life for her weight and any discussion of her health is no excuse and should not be spearheaded by them. A physician with some bedside manner perhaps, but not an aunt whose been allowed to bully a CHILD whole said child's life, but from the sounds of the parents worries, them as well. Nobody's weight is anyone else's business regardless of health because let's be honest, families will bully members into the frequent death-sentence that is ED don't care about health, they care about having their discomfort and fat-phobia accommodated. Fûçk auntie bully!!

Do you people telling her how important losing weight is think she doesn't already know this? Get real, folks. She will lose when she is damned good and ready. And if she never does, that is HER choice. Leave her alone! I have lived this my entire life. Now at 63 I have been diagnosed with a disorder that explains why I was never able to lose weight. Sometimes there are underlying circumstances that shaming will never change. Stay out of her business!

I would have taken the money, used it to go to a nice restaurant with a friend or my parents, and sent a photo to my dear aunt. Fat shaming never helped fat people (I'm one of them), but a good night out always help to feel better !

Ignoring all previous comments which seemed designed not to encourage healthy eating and exercise but make fun of and belittle her, a card with enough money for a certain amount of months of Weight Watchers could be a fine gift... if the message inside was 'I know you have been having problems maintaining a healthy weight and this concerns me due to all the health problems you could face. You are free to use this gift in the way you see fit, but this is enough for you to cover x amount of months of Weight Watchers. A program like this can help you learn healthier habits, help show you how you might still enjoy food but reduce portion sizes and connect you to a group of people who have also struggled with weight issues. I really hope experiencing such support can help you to lead a healthier life, love aunt x' The actual note written wasn't written in support, but ridicule. Such ridicule will usually lead to feels of shame and worthlessness that could make it harder to lose weight.

Being 320 pounds is morbidly obese and will cause serious health problems. The aunt is a total AH for the way she did it, but she is still correct in that she needs to lose weight. Also, why is it so embarrassing if it was only in front of her parents? They obviously know the aunt, her history of fat shaming, and that their daughter has a weight problem.

Is Aunt an a*5 or is she the truth teller in the family? I'mawake to the fa shaming etc, but your parents have done you no favours enabling you to get to that size at 18. Unless medically connected, you need to start taking your health serously. It will affect all aspects of your life - from fertility to mentality. Please do yourself a huge fvour and change for you and your future, it's not easy and you alone MUST want the change - it wont work if its revenge, or "I'll show them". I wish you the best of health and happiness, not tied to a scale reading or dress size, but tied to you living a long and fulfilling life, unhampered by health concerns! Tell aunt, parents, cousins, BFF to bugger off and take control of your own destiny. Start with your doctor in case there is an underlying health issue (in my case it was thyroid), so I really understand the name calling etc, but you need to stand up and take control. Best wishes

Maybe your aunt has been trying for years to get you to wake up! Rereading this, you admit you've put on a lot of weight since seeing the aunt, yet she gave you a card, containing money for WW and a note. NOT said aloud, you did that by questioning her in front of your parents! You're the AH, but mainly to yourself, your health is the biggest asset you can carry through life. At 18 you've got study, work, kids, marriage, in fact life ahead of you. Mental and physical health is affected by obesity, yet you were handed $$$$ to help get you started. Aunt might have a big mouth, but she put her money where her mouth is, because you and your enabling parents certainly haven't over the years

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OK she really needs to lose weight. Not trying to be rude or anything(she's not the a$$hole) but 320 at 18 is BAD.

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I noticed that the OP titled her question "AITA for refusing my birthday gift because it was a weight watchers subscription?". But it wasn't; it was money with a note suggesting she use it to subscribe to weight watchers, which is not the same thing. The misleading title seems almost designed to bring the body-positive crowd to her defence, and it's possible that it was less about the gift and more about seeking assurance and validation that she's fine as she is. There's no acknowledgement from her in her post that she accepts or even understands that 320 pounds is problematic, nor is there anything to suggest that she's ever tried to do anything about it by herself. She wants to be told that her weight isn't an issue and it's wrong for people to say that it is.