A recent Forbes Health/OnePoll survey showed that 48% of adults in the United States aim to improve their level of fitness in 2024. 38% of respondents want to improve their finances, 36% said the same about their mental health, while 34% want to lose weight. Furthermore, 32% of respondents said they want to have a better diet. 

On the flip side, some of the least popular resolutions include traveling more (barely 6% of respondents mentioned it), meditating (just 5%), drinking less alcohol (3%), and doing better at work (3%).

Though 62% of the people who participated in the survey said that they feel pressured to set a resolution for the New Year, a whopping 80% felt confident that they’ll be able to reach their goals. A mere 6% of respondents felt like they lacked the confidence to do so.

Of course, making resolutions is far easier than fulfilling them. What we’re essentially doing is creating new habits. And it can feel like we’ve ‘messed up’ if things do not go as well as we’ve imagined at the start. The important bit here is to stick with it, even when things are hard. Especially when they’re hard.

We’ve covered on Bored Panda recently that it takes around 3 weeks to develop new behavior patterns when you change your diet. It takes around 3 months in total for this behavior to stick and turn into a lifestyle change.

Meanwhile, it takes an average of 6 months to establish a new exercise routine. So if you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Your body and mind are changing. Slowly.

Therapist, author, and BACP member Menezes Cunningham was kind enough to share her thoughts about cultivating emotional resilience when things never seem to be going the way people would want them to.

“Give yourself a break. Allow yourself some time out. Let yourself wallow and grieve but give yourself a timeframe to do so,” the author of ‘365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-Care Ideas for Embodied Well-Being’ told Bored Panda via email.

“Emotional and mental pain activates the same parts of the brain as physical pain so it's helpful to do something physical like giving yourself (or getting) a big hug, letting yourself FEEL the disappointment,” the therapist explained to us.

“Maybe putting on a cozy top or grabbing a hot water bottle. Wrap yourself up in cotton wool a little and know that it will pass,” she shared some practical advice on how to deal with difficult situations.

The mental health expert noted that it’s important to set a time limit for how long you allow yourself to indulge these feelings. It’s essential that you don’t get stuck at this stage.

“It might be 30 minutes. It might be a month! Think about the time you might require to process this disappointment or embarrassment,” she said.

According to Menezes Cunningham, when we allow ourselves to feel these feelings, from sorrow and shame to mortification, we actually get them out of our systems “far faster than pretending to be fine immediately if you're not.” On top of that, physical movement can help us get out of this funk, too.

“Welcome ALL your feelings and share how you feel with people who you trust to support you,” the BACP senior accredited supervisor suggested to Bored Panda. She also noted that if things seem really bad and if you seem to be stuck in a negative spiral, you may want to consider reaching out to a coach or therapist. There is nothing shameful about asking for help when we need it. 

Bored Panda was interested in how people can recover more quickly after suffering a series of unfortunate events or a bout of awful luck. Comedy, according to the therapist, is one powerful but nuanced tool in our arsenal. 

“Laughing things off can be brilliant,” Menezes Cunningham said. “But if you're not feeling it, it might compound your pain and embarrassment—don't offer yourself up as a laughing stock if you're feeling vulnerable about it.”

Journaling can also help you process your feelings. The therapist also suggested looking into embodied journaling: “Record yourself talking about the event so you can watch back and see more about your body language and tone of voice. Are you aware of extra tension? Fighting back tears? Don't attempt to fast forward through your feelings but GIVE yourself some space to feel it all. Learn from it.”

According to the BACP member, when you feel ready, ask yourself how the moment or event has shaped you. “This is NOT to attempt to fast forward natural feelings or brightside/toxic positivity yourself.” The therapist pointed out that at some point, we might recognize that as painful as the series of events was, it did make us stronger and perhaps something else, too. 

Something else that can help you bounce back after failure is connecting with a future version of yourself. “Imagine yourself a week, month, year, decade in the future. What are you likely to remember from this event then? It's possible that these events helped you make some beneficial changes,” the therapist told Bored Panda that there’s usually a silver lining in these situations.

Even a bout of bad luck might have helped you find friendlier friends. Or it might have been a wake-up call that helped you set your priorities right.