“I Feel So Unprotected”: GF Stumped To Find BF Still Shares Bed With Ex “Platonically,” Ends Things
Sharing a bed with an ex is like inviting a bull into a china shop and expecting nothing to break – it’s messy, definitely awkward and absolutely not a good idea. Splitting the occasional bill or co-parenting a dog? Sure, totally fine. But cozying up under the same blanket, even with a “no-touching” rule? That’s just flirting with chaos. Somehow, though, not everyone got the memo.
One woman found herself in this eyebrow-raising situation, and let’s just say, it’s got people debating the fine line between “modern family” and “major red flag.”
More info: Mumsnet
When you invite your ex to share your bed, you might be inviting drama too
Image credits: Gary Barnes / Pexels (not the actual photo)
One woman was shocked to find out her boyfriend is still sleeping in the same bed with his ex-wife, despite being separated
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The man and his ex still live together, while the ex-wife finalizes her living arrangements
Image credits: Julia Avamotive / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman, who is head over heels for her boyfriend, is heartbroken and shocked to find out he is platonically sleeping with his his ex-wife
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Whatthefudge40
The woman asks if she is being unreasonable to break up with the man until he can sort out his feelings
The OP (original poster) gushed about her boyfriend, a 44-year-old dreamboat who seems to have it all – charisma, kindness, emotional depth, and even a knack for making strangers smile. Sounds like a keeper, right? Well, like in most of our stories, there’s a twist. The guy is still living with his ex-wife. Yes, you read that right. Apparently, they’re in a transitional phase, waiting for her to finalize housing arrangements.
Now, our OP, feeling optimistic and understanding, decided to roll with it. After all, she thought, he’s trying to keep things stable for his kids, and being compassionate isn’t exactly a dealbreaker. But what she didn’t think to ask, and probably should have, is “Where are you two sleeping?”
It turns out, her Prince Charming and his ex-wife occasionally share a bed. Platonically, of course. With a barrier down the middle, no less. Honestly, I wouldn’t know if I should laugh or cry, if I were the OP.
And the OP was blindsided herself. This news hit her like a bucket of cold water. So, she wonders if she’s overreacting and being unreasonable to break up with the man until he can sort out his feelings.
I get it, sharing a bed with an ex, regardless of the circumstances, would make most people’s alarms go off. And, while the OP’s boyfriend might not have bad intentions, it’s clear that their ideas of appropriate boundaries don’t really align.
Healthy boundaries in a romantic relationship are pretty much a must, if you want things to work smoothly. Healthy boundaries keep everyone on the same page, avoiding those awkward “Wait, you thought THAT was okay?” Ignore them, and it’s chaos.
Image credits: Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)
And, when it comes to exes, the lines need to be drawn in permanent marker, not pencil. Co-parenting? Yeah, that’s fine. But sharing a bed with your ex? That’s just weird.
Now, if there’s one thing this situation really tests, it’s trust. Trust is what makes a relationship work. Without it, things can fall apart pretty quickly, like when you mess up putting together Swedish furniture. No shame in that, we’ve all been there.
But the pros say that trust isn’t automatic, it’s earned over time, and it can crumble the moment your partner conveniently “forgets” to mention they’re sharing a bed with their ex. If you want trust to thrive, clear communication is key, especially about things that might raise eyebrows (or alarm bells). It’s not about oversharing—it’s about keeping your partner in the loop, so they don’t feel like the last to know.
It’s not just the bed-sharing that’s troubling—it’s what it represents. Our OP is questioning whether this lack of boundaries now could spell trouble for their future. And honestly, who wouldn’t? You’re told you’re the love of someone’s life one day, and the next, you find out they’re playing bedroom Tetris with their ex. Yikes.
What’s your take on this story? Do you think the poster is being unreasonable? Let us know in the comments!
Netizens are not buying the man’s story, saying he is still together with his wife
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Apparently her body knew immediately what her brain and heart refuse to accept - the guy is a lying sack of trouble.
While I believe you xan share a bed platonically with an ex, common sense would be to stop it when you are in a different relationship as to not hurt the new partner.
They wouldn't be sleeping in the same bed if they weren't still together. A couple that is broken up sleeps separately. One would be on the couch. Your guy is trying to have both of you. Id get out of this ASAP and get tested for STDs for your own safety. Don't be a fool. Don't stay with someone who is obviously making a complete fool of you. He can't have it both ways. Dump him.
You are making assumptions about the reason for their break-up. they don't have to be acrimonious, it's quite possible to remain friends. My ex even came to my next wedding a couple of years later (29 years ago now,, sill together).
Load More Replies...Sad to say, OP's getting snowed. Is that woman *really* his *ex?* Or are they both just able to have FWBs?
When I split up with my first wife (basically 'cos she wanted a different life, drop her/our thriving software consultancy and training business, go back to art college - she's now Dean of an English university) we continued living together for a while until we found her a flat in London, and indeed were still sharing the bed. Anyone who's been married for some years will know that as long as it's large enough it's perfectly possible to share a bed simply to sleep with no physical contact. So if that's all it is then I think she's maybe over-reacting just a tad, and as long as he stops now and definitively moves out then it may be nothing. Of course, it may be as others have suggested, but it's easy enough to establish the truth from this point on - if he or they insist on continuing in that state of affairs then the new girl should indeed walk smartly away from him.
The situation can be understandable and true, like you described. What bothers me more is that, to me, OP comes off like a schoolgirl and the way she is telling it, screams that she's being fooled. It's like I'm reading a dime novel.
Load More Replies...After getting done smashing it one last time she decided to break up with him. Sure sounds legit.
Just because they are no longer a good match, doesn't mean there has to be something wrong with either of them. Someone can be a perfect person, but just want completely different things in life than you, or your taste in men/women may simply have changed. I don't think that's true in this case, but in general someone can totally be perfect but not be the person you wanna be with.
Load More Replies...I am apparently more liberal than most people, but I'd totally trust forty-somethings who know they don't want to be together in a bed with a separator.
Apparently her body knew immediately what her brain and heart refuse to accept - the guy is a lying sack of trouble.
While I believe you xan share a bed platonically with an ex, common sense would be to stop it when you are in a different relationship as to not hurt the new partner.
They wouldn't be sleeping in the same bed if they weren't still together. A couple that is broken up sleeps separately. One would be on the couch. Your guy is trying to have both of you. Id get out of this ASAP and get tested for STDs for your own safety. Don't be a fool. Don't stay with someone who is obviously making a complete fool of you. He can't have it both ways. Dump him.
You are making assumptions about the reason for their break-up. they don't have to be acrimonious, it's quite possible to remain friends. My ex even came to my next wedding a couple of years later (29 years ago now,, sill together).
Load More Replies...Sad to say, OP's getting snowed. Is that woman *really* his *ex?* Or are they both just able to have FWBs?
When I split up with my first wife (basically 'cos she wanted a different life, drop her/our thriving software consultancy and training business, go back to art college - she's now Dean of an English university) we continued living together for a while until we found her a flat in London, and indeed were still sharing the bed. Anyone who's been married for some years will know that as long as it's large enough it's perfectly possible to share a bed simply to sleep with no physical contact. So if that's all it is then I think she's maybe over-reacting just a tad, and as long as he stops now and definitively moves out then it may be nothing. Of course, it may be as others have suggested, but it's easy enough to establish the truth from this point on - if he or they insist on continuing in that state of affairs then the new girl should indeed walk smartly away from him.
The situation can be understandable and true, like you described. What bothers me more is that, to me, OP comes off like a schoolgirl and the way she is telling it, screams that she's being fooled. It's like I'm reading a dime novel.
Load More Replies...After getting done smashing it one last time she decided to break up with him. Sure sounds legit.
Just because they are no longer a good match, doesn't mean there has to be something wrong with either of them. Someone can be a perfect person, but just want completely different things in life than you, or your taste in men/women may simply have changed. I don't think that's true in this case, but in general someone can totally be perfect but not be the person you wanna be with.
Load More Replies...I am apparently more liberal than most people, but I'd totally trust forty-somethings who know they don't want to be together in a bed with a separator.


























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