Guy Wonders If He’s A Jerk For Not Taking In His Neighbor’s Kid And Calling The Police Instead
Parents who can’t keep their kids under control can be a menace. Whether their child is having a meltdown, pestering perfect strangers, or running amok unsupervised, these folks just don’t seem to have any idea of their parenting responsibilities.
One guy experienced the fallout of poor parenting firsthand when he found an upset 8-year-old girl wandering around his yard one night. Not sure what to do, he called the police, but when the girl’s mother was found she accused him of being a jerk.
More info: Reddit
Taking care of a stranger’s kid is an unenviable position to be in, but this guy found he had no choice
Image credits: Annushka Ahuja / Pexels (not the actual photo)
After arriving home one night, he found a teary 8-year-old girl wandering around his yard unsupervised
Image credits: Kindel Media / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Unsure what to do next, the guy decided it would be best to get the police involved
Image credits: Ksenia Chernaya / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The police finally located the girl’s mother, but instead of being grateful, she hurled abuse at the guy for calling the cops
Image credits: AnybodyFun4383
The mom has since badmouthed the guy to everyone in the neighborhood, so he took to the web to ask netizens if he was a jerk for his handling of the unwelcome situation
OP begins his post by telling the community that he lives in an everyday neighborhood and isn’t particularly close to any of his neighbors. He goes on to say that one night he returned home to find what looked like an upset 8-year-old girl wandering around his yard. When he asked her why, all he got was some shrugs.
Uncertain how to handle the situation, OP decided to call the non-emergency line. The dispatch asked him to question the little girl, but she just mumbled and shrugged again, so they asked him if he could keep an eye on her until the cops came. On arrival, the officer asked OP for some info and went to the neighbors to try and find a parent.
OP says that as soon as the police got involved, he extricated himself from the situation and went about his night. Much to his surprise, a woman showed up at his door later and asked him if he was the person who reported her child to the police. OP tried his best to explain, but the woman went off on him, accusing him of being a total jerk.
Ever since, the woman has been slandering OP to the entire neighborhood, so he turned to Reddit to ask the community whether or not he did the right thing.
From what OP tells us in his post, he was just trying to do the right thing while not getting too involved in the awkward situation. Now he’s the neighborhood bad guy, but isn’t the kid’s mother really at fault here? Perhaps it’s her parenting that needs some work.
Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)
In her article for VeryWellMind, Kendra Cherry writes that parenting styles are constructs used to articulate the different strategies parents tend to turn to when raising their children. Cherry says these styles encompass parents’ attitudes, behaviors, and the emotional environment they raise their kids in.
According to Cherry, there are four recognized parenting styles, mostly thanks to the pioneering work of psychologist Diana Baumrind.
First off is authoritarian parenting. In this style, kids are expected to follow strict rules set by their parents or risk punishment. Next up is authoritative parenting, which, like authoritarian parenting, involves rules and guidelines, but is far more democratic.
Third is permissive parenting, which sees the parents make very few demands of their children and tend towards letting them make their own decisions. Finally, there’s uninvolved, or neglectful, parenting, which is characterized by few demands, low responsiveness, and very little communication.
In her article for Psychology Today, Karyl McBride (Ph.D.) writes that neglectful parents will often use shame and humiliation when the child tries to get their love or approval. The danger in this is that the child may ultimately stop trying, and the loneliness that follows might indeed turn out to be easier to deal with than the disgrace or neglect.
Based on OP’s story, we think it’s safe to say their neighbor falls squarely into the uninvolved parenting category and should probably work on her relationship with her kid.
What would you have done if you’d found yourself in OP’s shoes? Do you think the mom had a right to get mad at him? Share your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers swiftly concluded that the guy was not a jerk and made the safest decision in the moment
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What a strange and unpleasant-sounding world some people must live in. Of course we have no context as to the neighbourhood but in principal the idea of a nine-year-old being out on their own in the evening would not even raise an eyebrow where I live. The police would most likely tell you to mind your own business anyway, unless there was some additional reason for concern.
It sounds like she was obviously very upset and couldn't communicate her needs. That's a different situation from a kid just playing around the neighborhood.
Load More Replies...In today's world where kids are taken and never seen again, that mother should have been grateful. There's no way I would take a kid inside my home, and I'm not risking an allergic reaction by giving a kid a snack. I don't even want to think about all of the accusations that would cause, and I don't need that in my life. I'd do exactly what this person did, and I hope everyone would.
NTA for contacting the police, but your attitude is atrocious. You have no sympathy or empathy, and you sound like a s**t neighbor. You wouldn't even give the kid a snack.......after the police arrived and you would be fully clear. Wow, you're a grade A uncaring jerk.
As a single middle aged man, I'm saying OP did the exact right thing. Being seen giving snacks to a little girl or taking her in the house is A BAD LOOK. Instead of "narc" or "police caller", people would be accusing him of being a pedo.
Load More Replies...What a strange and unpleasant-sounding world some people must live in. Of course we have no context as to the neighbourhood but in principal the idea of a nine-year-old being out on their own in the evening would not even raise an eyebrow where I live. The police would most likely tell you to mind your own business anyway, unless there was some additional reason for concern.
It sounds like she was obviously very upset and couldn't communicate her needs. That's a different situation from a kid just playing around the neighborhood.
Load More Replies...In today's world where kids are taken and never seen again, that mother should have been grateful. There's no way I would take a kid inside my home, and I'm not risking an allergic reaction by giving a kid a snack. I don't even want to think about all of the accusations that would cause, and I don't need that in my life. I'd do exactly what this person did, and I hope everyone would.
NTA for contacting the police, but your attitude is atrocious. You have no sympathy or empathy, and you sound like a s**t neighbor. You wouldn't even give the kid a snack.......after the police arrived and you would be fully clear. Wow, you're a grade A uncaring jerk.
As a single middle aged man, I'm saying OP did the exact right thing. Being seen giving snacks to a little girl or taking her in the house is A BAD LOOK. Instead of "narc" or "police caller", people would be accusing him of being a pedo.
Load More Replies...
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