When you live around other people, you have to find a way to coexist with them. A full-blown neighborhood war doesn’t benefit anyone.

So, after Rachel Bigio, a realtor from Los Angeles, and her husband were approached by the woman next door asking them to turn down their yard lights, the couple obliged.

However, instead of showing some appreciation for the thoughtful gesture, the lady soon came back with even more demands. Unsure about how to react, Rachel described the situation on Threads and asked everyone to share any advice they might have. Here’s what she wrote.

Sometimes being neighborly means making compromises, even when they might be a little inconvenient

Image credits: Smurfgrl84 (not the actual photo)

But what happens when their requests turn into demands that disrupt your day-to-day life?

Image credits: thelittleorangetable

Lights can be just as big of a nuisance to our neighbors as, say, noise, but was the woman really bothered by what was coming from the kitchen?

Image credits: Image-Source (Not the actual photo)

To some extent, the complaints may have been reasonable. “When one thinks of a neighbor disturbing the peace and quiet, noise is usually the first violation that comes to mind: music blasting, late-night parties, and so on,” said attorney Brian Farkas, an associate attorney at Goetz Fitzpatrick LLP in New York. “But light can be another equally annoying, as well as legally significant disturbance.”

“Like noisiness, light pollution is recognized as a ‘nuisance’ by courts in most parts of the United States,” he explained. “A nuisance is a type of conduct that disturbs a neighbor’s use or enjoyment of property. A neighbor who blasts loud music late at night, for example, would be an obvious example of a nuisance. In addition, many cities have passed noise ordinances limiting the times or decibel levels at which residents can make noise.”

“While not all municipalities have specific laws about light pollution, that doesn’t leave you without a legal remedy. You could bring a lawsuit on ‘common law’ nuisance grounds.”

But ideally, it shouldn’t come to that. If you’re blinded by your neighbors’ lights, the attorney said your first step should be to walk over to their door and nicely explain how they’re affecting you, which the woman did.

However, if the problem persists, there’s a relatively easy solution: invite your neighbor over to your home in the evening to show the result. Chances are, your neighbor is a rational person and will agree to take steps to re-point the lights or install appropriate shades. Hopefully, that’s exactly what these folks can do. And maybe have a cup of tea to bury the hatchet, too.

Comment from Dr. Sarah Meehan O’Callaghan

Resolving conflicts between neighbours can be challenging, especially since people are not always entirely rational. In fact, it might be more accurate to say that everyone has an element of irrationality. The difficulty lies in never knowing exactly what you’re dealing with—some individuals, like children, test boundaries and require firm but fair responses.

While having a light shining into your window can certainly be irritating, the neighbor who complained seems to be making an unreasonable demand. Expecting someone to turn off their kitchen lights by 10 p.m. is excessive. More importantly, accommodating such a request raises the question: if this demand is met, what will they ask for next? – Dr. Sarah Meehan O’Callaghan

As the woman’s story went viral, she answered some of the biggest questions people had for her

Image credits: thelittleorangetable

The post has received a lot of reactions and advice

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