I think the one commenter was spot on. The message this woman gives is that her love of her daughter is conditional. And the condition she makes is arbitrary and cruel. She decides that having her way and making decisions about her daughter's body is more important to her than her daughter's wellbeing. And that she'll punish her daughter for liking things she doesn't like, using her needs against her to do so. That shows she doesn't love her daughter enough to respect her. This is not about anything illegal or seriously inconveniencing. This is not about something her daughter can just stop doing while she's at home. No matter how anyone thinks about tattoos, and I do believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion on this topic, it's still true that the tattoo is now part of her daughter and part of her expression of herself. And what this 'mom' is doing is telling her that just a bit of ink at her shoulder is enough to lose her moms acceptance despite anything else that she does.

My mom hated tattoos but it was always "I prefer you had none ..." Without real heat behind it. She even wrote her initial to use as a memorial tattoo when she was terminal ill because it was what I wanted. This mother however is a grade a a******

Basically you gave her permission to get the tattoo. Just because you don't like her choice AS AN ADULT, you have no say in it. Now you are restricting her future and her psychological well-being, AFTER your basic consent. You ARE in the wrong. If your love for your daughter is dependent on your aversion of something as trivial as a tattoo, you are demonstrating YOU DON'T LOVE HER UNCONDITIONALLY.

When you are old and alone and wonder why your daughter isn't around...remember this. You will loose you daughter over a butterfly tattoo.

If the tattoo was a beheaded child when the mother lost a kid to beheading I'd understand the reaction but a damn butterfly? Wtf is wrong with people.

YTA. Is this really the hill you want to die on? Your daughter has just realised that your love for her is conditional. Get over yourself or risk losing your relationship with her.

I will never understand parents who put their own preferences over their children’s happiness. My love for my kids will never be conditionally on them following some made up rule that realistically makes no difference to me. Are there things I’d rather my kids didn’t do? Sure, but I’ve raised them to be their own people, to prioritise their own happiness, that includes over mine. Being a decent human being and hoping I’ve raised them without f*****g them up is the best I can ever ask for. There comes a point you need to let your kids go and be the independent individuals you’ve spent their life teaching them to be.

OP is a hypocrite. I’m sure they did EXACTLY as their parents told them all their life and NEVER challenged them or their authority.

If you think you are the a*****e, you most certainly ARE the a*****e.

OP is doing an excellent job of ensuring her daughter will leave her alone for the rest of her life. Seriously, the whole "my house my rules" attitude only serves to push away your children once they're no longer financially dependent on you.

My body, my choice. No one gets to dictate what I wear, what tattoos I have (or indeed don’t have done), where I have piercings, how I cut my hair, how my beard looks, what shoes I wear. You do you, I’ll do me. If it offends you then just move out of the way I’m moving forward without you.

ESH.. not a fan of controlling parents, and not a fan of grown adults moving back home for free then complaining about stupid rules.. sounds like family therapy could do these 2 some good.

Everyone should be allowed to express themselves and show who they are

"no i have the rights to decide what you do with/to your body!!" stfu and sit down lady or you'll lose a daughter

YTA. My sister has a good amount of tattoos and my mom doesn't like them. She thinks they're a "waste of money" However she's never threatened to have my sister banned from the house or anything like that. She just ignores it.

I am not pro tattoo. But Revelations 19:16 says Jesus has one on his thigh! So it can’t be a bad thing. It is a matter of personal preference.

My mom HATES tattoos and I have many of them, she was always very vocal about her dislike however she never once threatened me with homelessness if I got one. This is such a controlling thing and it is honestly a very c**p wituation for the daughter. She is putting conditions on her child and that's not ok.

Is the mother willing to be known as "the mother who was willing to make her daughter homeless over a butterfly tattoo on the shoulder"? I'm glad she had doubts about her rule. The story is over a year old, don't know the outcome. Maybe the daughter wore a a band aid over the tattoo.

Op"s daughter modified her body and Op doesn't like it. At a time like this, one has to fight fire with fire. Op should also modify her body by gauging op's own eyes out. That'll show the daughter that two can play that game.

YTA. Is this really the hill you're willing to let your relationship with your daughter die on? She's the same person she was before she had a tattoo. Don't be surprised if once she moves out she has minimal contact with you

People get upset over the dumbest things. I went to the bank the other day, and who helped me but a nice lady with tattoos on her arms. Tattoos are not that controversial anymore and frankly never should have been.

NTA, your house your rules. I don’t personally agree with it, but me (nor her) have to agree with it…they’re your rules. And whether I (or anyone else) agree with it or not, mom has been pretty consistent with expectations on the tattoos.