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Heartbreaking For The Kids: Couple’s Gender Reveal Goes Viral For All The Wrong Reasons

Heartbreaking For The Kids: Couple’s Gender Reveal Goes Viral For All The Wrong Reasons

Interview With Author Heartbreaking For The Kids: Couple's Gender Reveal Goes Viral For All The Wrong ReasonsGender Reveal Party Planner Horrified At Parents’ Reaction To Having A GirlGender Reveal Party Goes South After Parents Didn’t Get The Gender They Expected“Ended In Tears”: Couple Can’t Hide Disappointment At Gender RevealWoman Gets Reminded Why She’s Childfree After Hearing About Gender Reveal That Ended In TearsGender Reveal Ends In Disappointment As Couple Publicly Expresses Letdown Over Baby’s Gender“Misogyny Begins At Conception”: Internet Feels Sorry For 2 Daughters After A Gender Reveal“Gender Reveal Ended In Tears”: Couple Angry And Upset They’re Having A Girl“Misogyny Begins At Conception”: Internet Feels Sorry For 2 Daughters After A Gender Reveal “The Dad Looked Angry”: Gender Reveal Ends In Tears Over ‘Wrong’ Gender
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Gender reveal parties exploded onto the scene in the 2000s, covering people in pink and blue confetti. And causing much controversy. The woman credited with starting the trend later said she regretted it, and felt she had “created a monster”. But it was too late. People continue to host elaborate parties, to announce to friends and family whether they’ll be “buying toy cars or Barbies” for the next few years.

One woman shared how a recent gender reveal event took an unexpected turn the moment the parents-to-be found out they’d be having a girl. Their disappointment was so massive, the party ended in tears. Bored Panda reached out to the woman and she kindly agreed to tell us more.

RELATED:

    There are many ways to make the big announcement at your gender reveal party, should you choose to have one

    Image credits: Gaby / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    For one couple, it was an envelope that contained a much unwanted surprise

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    Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: koreageis

    Image credits: Canva Studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    The woman was surprised that her mother-in-law found the parents’ reactions funny

    The woman told Bored Panda she decided to post about the party to see if other people also found the parents’ behavior weird. “My mother-in-law had told me the story while laughing, because she thought the reactions of the parents and grandmother were funny,” said the woman during our chat. “I personally found their reactions a little disturbing, and wanted to feel validated for thinking it was weird.”

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    She said she wasn’t too surprised by the comments, but added that someone had asked why the gender reveal party incident reminded her why she’s child-free. “I told them it’s because I’m aware that my love for a kid would be conditional (dependent on their personality and other things), and I wouldn’t want to put those expectations on a child.”

    The woman revealed in a separate online post that she’d had her fallopian tubes removed this year so that she remains child-free. Bored Panda asked her to elaborate a bit more on why she’s against having children. “My biggest reason for being child-free is that I want to travel and have freedom. My childhood also wasn’t great and I don’t have the desire to raise kids nor the confidence to raise them the way they deserve,” she replied.

    Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Gender disappointment (GD) is a term used to describe the “grief” some parents feel when they learn the biological sex of their baby

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    There’s a difference between gender and sex. Parents.com explains it like this: “Gender is a personal identity that exists on a spectrum, can change over the course of a person’s lifetime, and—most importantly—is something that a person defines for themselves. Sex, on the other hand, is assigned at birth based on the appearance of a baby’s genitalia. While sex assigned at birth often matches a person’s gender (called cisgender), sometimes it does not.”

    Dr. Lindsay McMillan is a clinical psychologist who specializes in gender disappointment. McMillan describes it as “a parenthood experience which involves holding a preference for having a daughter or a son and experiencing emotional distress when baby’s sex does not match.” She adds that there can often be “a sense of grief” that accompanies gender disappointment.

    Author and psychotherapist Anna Mathur experienced gender disappointment during her first and second pregnancies. She says gender disappointment can cause feelings of guilt and shame. But adds that parents should realize these feelings are valid, and deserve to be explored regardless of how long they are experienced for.

    “It’s normal to have a gender preference. It’s the silence and the taboo that balloon it into a guilty secret,” said Mathur. “We all have our stories, histories and reasons, and some of them just take a little more making sense of than others.”

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    “PLOT TWIST, the world’s first gender-reveal party baby is a girl who wears suits!”

    Jenna Karvunidis threw the first gender reveal party in 2008. At the time, she announced her baby’s sex by cutting into a cake filled with pink icing. She blogged about it, it went viral, and the rest, as they say, is history. Soon, parents all over were following in Karvunidis’ footsteps.

    But by 2019, the mother was singing a different tune. “Who cares what gender the baby is?” she asked in a Facebook post. “PLOT TWIST,” wrote Karvunidis. “The world’s first gender-reveal party baby is a girl who wears suits!” The post was accompanied by a family photo featuring her daughter wearing a pale blue blazer and pants.

    Karvunidis said she threw the party in 2008 because “we didn’t live in 2019 and didn’t know what we know now.” The mom added that “assigning focus on gender at birth leaves out so much of their potential and talents that have nothing to do with what’s between their legs.”

    The woman gave some more info in response to curious netizens

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    “Misogyny begins at conception, it seems”: People came forth with their thoughts on the matter

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    Netizens felt inspired to share their own similar stories

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

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    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    What do you think ?
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    Doodles1983
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Influencer origins, attention seeking and milking it for all it's worth. I saw a reveal for baby 9 the other day. It's disgusting. And rename them to "sex reveals" gender is determined later.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This sounds like my entire family. Culturally, sons are valued much higher than daughters, so I have a LOT of relatives who treat their daughters borderline like slaves (I'm not even being spurious, the girls are forced to do all the chores for the ENTIRE family and are beaten if they don't do them "correctly".) Sons are treated like literal kings and can do no wrong. One of my cousins is in jail because he shot someone, and up to my aunt's dying breath, she said her precious boy had done nothing wrong, he should be free, and the person he shot "must have deserved it" (it was gang-related.) Meanwhile her daughter had long since been exiled because she dared to marry someone who wasn't the same race as my family. I don't understand the "boy mom" thing or the value that some people seem to place on sons.

    Spencer's slave no longer
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have 2 sons, born 13 months apart. My choice. Everyone kept asking when I was "going to try for a girl". My answer was always "never, I have exactly what I wanted, two healthy kids close in age". My dad (step) has 4 daughters, me and my 3 sisters. I changed my birth name by Deed Poll so I could have my his, my Dad's, name on my marriage certificate. My boys carry his name. Gender isn't everything, raising good kids into good adults is what matters.

    Load More Replies...
    Chewie
    Community Member
    14 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a total pair of douchebags. I feel so sorry for their girls. They are never going to be enough for their parents. Trust me, I know what that feels like. Being less than, just because your born female. Just FYI to those idiots, sperm determines the gender. But judging by this post, i don't think either one of them would understand the science.

    Winnie the Moo
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The way the MIL organized this gender reveal is setting people up for disappointment. It’s a girl! Psych! It’s a boy! Psych! It’s a girl! Psych! Jeezzzz

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good luck. I know a family with eight (8) daughters because the father HAD TO have a boy. After the 8th girl the mother apparently grew a spine and stopped it.

    CanadianDimes
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The more children you have of one sex, the more likely the next child will be that sex as well.

    Load More Replies...
    Elio
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The reddit user OpheliaLives7 makes many good points. I strongly disagree that "gender disappointment" is a normal way to behave. These people are just sexist pricks, more specifically they are mostly misogynistic because it's usually when the baby is a girl that you see the screaming temper tantrums. Anyway, being an adult having a full on temper tantrum because the baby is the "wrong gender" is pathetic behavior that should be shamed. There's a 50/50 chance for it being a girl or a boy; this is not news. People should stop pushing sexist stereotypes onto their kids. Also, pink for girls and blue for boys is just a very effective marketing campaign to get people to buy more sh!t by convincing them that if their oldest kid is a different sex than the younger one, they can't possibly reuse the baby stuff.

    Elio
    Community Member
    13 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another thing is that kids are expensive, regardless of if they are sons or daughters. If they had a son, they'd need to get a suit for him for prom and that's expensive too. I guarantee that any financial hardship this couple has is going to be from having a bunch of kids in order to get a son for their medieval monarchy LARP-ing. Edit: I feel bad for the daughters since they're always going to be less than for being female. If they end up with a younger brother then that's going to be even worse. I even feel bad for the possible son because no one likes sociopathic golden children and they're on their own after mommy and daddy die. My cousin was the favored only son and fortunately cousin is a truley good person despite my uncle's efforts to turn him into an a$$hole like him. But my cousin still struggled because he parents didn't do things like make him do his chores well or hold him accountable for trying in school.

    Load More Replies...
    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I will do one of those parties when I am a dad. Hear me out and let me know if it sounds nice or not. All feedback good or bad is welcome :D I will go to the most pristine forest in Australia Greece or the USA! In summer for my FAVOURITE zodiac signs. We will time the pregnancy! Because I want to celebrate nature my future partner will be that kinda gal too!!! I will take 2 sparrows I will strap both lucky birds with cute little jackets. Inside is a bottle filled with Pyrotechnic Salt infused Napalm and some C4 Plastic Ex for an Extra pop! That way everyone can see! One will be Strontium salts for a beautiful scarlet colour. The other will be Copper salts for the gentle hue of sky blue. Red for boy, blue for girl CUS WE HAVE TO BE UNIQUE! After releasing the birds my wife will click the detonator! Programmed so that only the CLOSEST birds erupts in flame! It symbolizes our closeness to nature and will decide if we are having a baby or an abortion! Based on the colour!

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ps: I sto...I mean picked and modified that last joke from the movie The Dictator... It is hillarious i hightly recommend it! Also from the insanity of what i wrote you can guess what i think of the level of vanity and self absorbed depraved level of narsassism that those parties project about those kinda ppl... Just dont go too far...have a colored cake or one of those confetti poppers or something...

    Load More Replies...
    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Crying over genitals. Their baby is going to have a vulva instead of a penis. That is what it all boils down to. It's ridiculous. Why so much emphasis is put on this, I will never understand. It's a person.

    Guess Undheit
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The pathetic males getting mad because the child is a girl have the same mentality as those who practice sex selective abortion - or worse, infanticide (e.g. feeding husks or poison to infants and cause them to choke to death). [ https://thinkindiaquarterly.org/index.php/think-india/article/download/13284/8542/ ] They're nothing but potential rapists.

    Noyfb noyfb
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do these tacky, deluded people consider that their prized “male” child in due time may turn out a TRANS WOMAN and decide she had been female all the time, required to live falsely, painfully as a male in spite of her deep sense of herself as female????

    Bookworm
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can pretty much guarantee that they didn't. The kind of people who take their gender reveal this seriously have probably never considered for a second that their child might not be cis or straight.

    Load More Replies...
    Carl Roberts
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Today I'm reminded why I'm child free"....Because other people have gender reveal parties??

    Say No to Downvoting
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP actually responded to that and I thought it was a well reasoned answer: they knew they would have expectation of their child that their child may not meet so they chose not to be a douchebag parent with expectation by not being a parent at all. Makes perfect sense.

    Load More Replies...
    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is one reason ultrasound techs sometimes refuse to reveal genders to parents, especially in the first and early 2nd trimesters. It's disgusting a baby can be less desired, less cherished over genitals.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tough decision... if it is a girl, she will be born into a life of abuse and maybe not survive infancy.

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    lwolf1952
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least America doesn't have to worry about the two daughters ever becoming president, but if they have a son he can be president even if he's a total dirtbag.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe after you remove the two party system and lobbyists and have all votes count the same...A person who happens to be a woman can become president. Because if you think sex is the main reason why no woman was elected in modern time...You would be missing what is actually wrong... Look at Europe for inspiration maybe? And please understand why i said "happens to be a woman" If you want to elect a leader because of their genitals it is no better than what those parents do to their poor kids...

    Load More Replies...
    Mavis
    Community Member
    10 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Forgive my ignorance but does this mean both parents didnt know the gender? But yeah the party planner knows. The whole thing is weird.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it India where they have a shortage of women, so not every golden son can find a wife? And they still treat the girls as garbage there. It would be goid if these societies would get their dream of only sons. They will automatically fade out. Unless they go and abduct women.

    Socks Thecate
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have never been to a gender reveal party and likely just wouldn't if I was ever invited to one. I guess this reaction of the parents is why China has 110 males to every 100 females.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And of those 100 women a lot are educated, independent and have decided that they only want someone as educated and financially stable as them, soooo...cry me a river, golden boys. It seems you are going to remain single.

    Load More Replies...
    Petra Peitsch
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor baby-girl! Whatever she did in one of her previous lifes, didn't deserve to be born in this family of 1000-star-mnorons.

    UKGrandad
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Weird that neither parent - at least one of whom would have had to have been present when the sex was determined by an ultrasound scan - or any of their relatives knew the sex but a party planner did. Somebody had to tell her...unless she went along to the scan with the mother-to-be, which would have been odd to say the least.

    Dre Mosley
    Community Member
    7 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even the woman who's credited with starting the whole gender reveal party thing wishes she hadn't.

    Adz86
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both these people need to be sent to a discount vet for desexing. Scumbag humans.

    Pedro Badan
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well the parents-to-be are obviously both complete asshats who should never have been allowed to breed, but geez, who on earth thought it would be a great idea to repeatedly "reveal" the truw gender and then "reveal" you were lying and then "reveal" a different true gender and then "reveal" you were lying again, ad infinitum? This idiotic event could only possibly have ended in tears of frustration and disappointment, in my opinion.

    ABC no seven FCK CENSORING
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm disgusted that some of the comments here are even worse than the story they are written under. Holy smokes, I'm out.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would you wait until a public party if you cared what sex your baby is? Why wouldn't you ask the doctor? Those poor kids, they'll be punished for not being boys or just ignored in favour of their brother if he appears. What horrible people.

    Rdj
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought this was fake, cause I always assumed they knew the gender. They tell you with the 20 week ultrasound. I thought they just threw a party to let the others know too. They don't know themselves?

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    Tams21
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If someone even thinks they might love a child less because of their gender then they simply shouldn't have kids. Even if they get their wish, those are often the kind of parents who hold their kids to their own unrealistic and unfair expectations.

    Say No to Downvoting
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not just for their gender but anything: disability, sexually, interests and skills. If you want a preppy, straight boy that’s a sports fanatic, will you still love a viral that’s a lesbian goth artist?

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    Panda Kicki
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still better then doing a late abortion when finding out the sex isnt what you wanted. Hete people want girls and I know three cases of that happening with baby boys.

    Lady Miss Pie
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are these people, Henry VIII? Who cares if it’s a boy or girl? Good lord

    Beth Wheeler
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They are so stupid, either tell people what you're having or put it on the baby shower invitations.

    Hey!
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the party planner was a completely douche and a jerk. You don't play with people's mind like that. Even if didn't mind one way or the other, you don't play ping pong with it; anyone would have been upset playing that game.

    Alyssa Phillips
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe down voted but story time. I have 3 children. The first one we had a traditional shower. The second we found out was the opposite sex so we had a "sprinkle" (mother's idea)-a sked for clothes and diapers only. The third we had a gender reveal--really just an excuse to celebrate. Nothing fancy, the cake inside was pink and we asked for diapers and wipes only. Mainly we had a party without asking for massive gifts since it was baby number 3.

    WonderWoman
    Community Member
    5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When were gender reveals ever acceptable? They are a stupid money and attention grab for pathetic people. That there are "planners" for such stupidity I suppose isn't too surprising - even circuses need people to sweep up the elephant poop.

    Tristan J
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    1: you should not have a gender reveal party knowing that one of the two options is undesirable to you. 2: other people making poor choices should not remind you why you don't have kids

    Cecilie Hammershøy
    Community Member
    7 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Somebody should tell them that's the sperm that determined the gender, so she's not broken.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For God's sake, when and why did we move from 'we are happy and grateful for our child' to ' I want/need/require/ a boy/girl' ?

    ArchangelLoki
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mum always joked that if I'd been a boy she would have left me at the hospital, but I know full well that it is a JOKE and she would have loved me just the same. These parents are unhinged.

    Joe Reaves
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you want to go the gender reveal route with a cake or something just as a fun celebration it's fine, whatever makes you happy, but you can't do it if you deeply care about the gender one way or the other because there's a 50/50chance you're going to be disappointed in front of everyone. And if your kids are already old enough to understand and you're disappointed because the new baby is the same gender as them you're going to f**k them up! If your idea of a gender reveal involves anything more complicated than a cake or a balloon with confetti (which you better do indoors and clean up yourself), you're insane. And if you're going to try and build a confetti cannon, do some research on the difference between that and a freaking pipe bomb because there are so many stories where someone has basically built a pipe bomb and the gender reveal ends up in the ER or the morgue.

    Rafael
    Community Member
    10 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a son last year. Didn't wanted this gender reveal b******t, but my wife wanted an excuse for party and presents, so we got one. But we knew the gender beforehand, and we did a simply 3d tic tac toe out of cardboard and styrofoam. Not gonna lie I would like to have a boy and a girl, but that isn't the top priority, I've rather have healthy, happy kids of any gender.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do get the down votes of this, but it is an important topic. The number and content of replies shows that.

    similarly
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was growing up, my Mom told me repeatedly that the only reason she had me was because she wanted a little girl.

    DrBronxx
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Awful, awful people. Also, gender reveals f*****g suck. Also, GENDER REVEALS F*****G SUCK.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I will never understand parents like that... Why have a kid if you are going to be disappointed if they are a girl or a boy??? If that means you will love your kid less... YOU SHOULD NOT BE HAVING KIDS! What if they swap when they are adults? It has the same sick energy of parents who don't want their sons to be gay because they won't have grandkids... SICK!

    Doodles1983
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Influencer origins, attention seeking and milking it for all it's worth. I saw a reveal for baby 9 the other day. It's disgusting. And rename them to "sex reveals" gender is determined later.

    Load More Replies...
    LakotaWolf (she/her)
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This sounds like my entire family. Culturally, sons are valued much higher than daughters, so I have a LOT of relatives who treat their daughters borderline like slaves (I'm not even being spurious, the girls are forced to do all the chores for the ENTIRE family and are beaten if they don't do them "correctly".) Sons are treated like literal kings and can do no wrong. One of my cousins is in jail because he shot someone, and up to my aunt's dying breath, she said her precious boy had done nothing wrong, he should be free, and the person he shot "must have deserved it" (it was gang-related.) Meanwhile her daughter had long since been exiled because she dared to marry someone who wasn't the same race as my family. I don't understand the "boy mom" thing or the value that some people seem to place on sons.

    Spencer's slave no longer
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have 2 sons, born 13 months apart. My choice. Everyone kept asking when I was "going to try for a girl". My answer was always "never, I have exactly what I wanted, two healthy kids close in age". My dad (step) has 4 daughters, me and my 3 sisters. I changed my birth name by Deed Poll so I could have my his, my Dad's, name on my marriage certificate. My boys carry his name. Gender isn't everything, raising good kids into good adults is what matters.

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    Chewie
    Community Member
    14 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a total pair of douchebags. I feel so sorry for their girls. They are never going to be enough for their parents. Trust me, I know what that feels like. Being less than, just because your born female. Just FYI to those idiots, sperm determines the gender. But judging by this post, i don't think either one of them would understand the science.

    Winnie the Moo
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The way the MIL organized this gender reveal is setting people up for disappointment. It’s a girl! Psych! It’s a boy! Psych! It’s a girl! Psych! Jeezzzz

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good luck. I know a family with eight (8) daughters because the father HAD TO have a boy. After the 8th girl the mother apparently grew a spine and stopped it.

    CanadianDimes
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The more children you have of one sex, the more likely the next child will be that sex as well.

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    Elio
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The reddit user OpheliaLives7 makes many good points. I strongly disagree that "gender disappointment" is a normal way to behave. These people are just sexist pricks, more specifically they are mostly misogynistic because it's usually when the baby is a girl that you see the screaming temper tantrums. Anyway, being an adult having a full on temper tantrum because the baby is the "wrong gender" is pathetic behavior that should be shamed. There's a 50/50 chance for it being a girl or a boy; this is not news. People should stop pushing sexist stereotypes onto their kids. Also, pink for girls and blue for boys is just a very effective marketing campaign to get people to buy more sh!t by convincing them that if their oldest kid is a different sex than the younger one, they can't possibly reuse the baby stuff.

    Elio
    Community Member
    13 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another thing is that kids are expensive, regardless of if they are sons or daughters. If they had a son, they'd need to get a suit for him for prom and that's expensive too. I guarantee that any financial hardship this couple has is going to be from having a bunch of kids in order to get a son for their medieval monarchy LARP-ing. Edit: I feel bad for the daughters since they're always going to be less than for being female. If they end up with a younger brother then that's going to be even worse. I even feel bad for the possible son because no one likes sociopathic golden children and they're on their own after mommy and daddy die. My cousin was the favored only son and fortunately cousin is a truley good person despite my uncle's efforts to turn him into an a$$hole like him. But my cousin still struggled because he parents didn't do things like make him do his chores well or hold him accountable for trying in school.

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    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I will do one of those parties when I am a dad. Hear me out and let me know if it sounds nice or not. All feedback good or bad is welcome :D I will go to the most pristine forest in Australia Greece or the USA! In summer for my FAVOURITE zodiac signs. We will time the pregnancy! Because I want to celebrate nature my future partner will be that kinda gal too!!! I will take 2 sparrows I will strap both lucky birds with cute little jackets. Inside is a bottle filled with Pyrotechnic Salt infused Napalm and some C4 Plastic Ex for an Extra pop! That way everyone can see! One will be Strontium salts for a beautiful scarlet colour. The other will be Copper salts for the gentle hue of sky blue. Red for boy, blue for girl CUS WE HAVE TO BE UNIQUE! After releasing the birds my wife will click the detonator! Programmed so that only the CLOSEST birds erupts in flame! It symbolizes our closeness to nature and will decide if we are having a baby or an abortion! Based on the colour!

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ps: I sto...I mean picked and modified that last joke from the movie The Dictator... It is hillarious i hightly recommend it! Also from the insanity of what i wrote you can guess what i think of the level of vanity and self absorbed depraved level of narsassism that those parties project about those kinda ppl... Just dont go too far...have a colored cake or one of those confetti poppers or something...

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    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Crying over genitals. Their baby is going to have a vulva instead of a penis. That is what it all boils down to. It's ridiculous. Why so much emphasis is put on this, I will never understand. It's a person.

    Guess Undheit
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The pathetic males getting mad because the child is a girl have the same mentality as those who practice sex selective abortion - or worse, infanticide (e.g. feeding husks or poison to infants and cause them to choke to death). [ https://thinkindiaquarterly.org/index.php/think-india/article/download/13284/8542/ ] They're nothing but potential rapists.

    Noyfb noyfb
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do these tacky, deluded people consider that their prized “male” child in due time may turn out a TRANS WOMAN and decide she had been female all the time, required to live falsely, painfully as a male in spite of her deep sense of herself as female????

    Bookworm
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can pretty much guarantee that they didn't. The kind of people who take their gender reveal this seriously have probably never considered for a second that their child might not be cis or straight.

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    Carl Roberts
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Today I'm reminded why I'm child free"....Because other people have gender reveal parties??

    Say No to Downvoting
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP actually responded to that and I thought it was a well reasoned answer: they knew they would have expectation of their child that their child may not meet so they chose not to be a douchebag parent with expectation by not being a parent at all. Makes perfect sense.

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    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is one reason ultrasound techs sometimes refuse to reveal genders to parents, especially in the first and early 2nd trimesters. It's disgusting a baby can be less desired, less cherished over genitals.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tough decision... if it is a girl, she will be born into a life of abuse and maybe not survive infancy.

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    lwolf1952
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least America doesn't have to worry about the two daughters ever becoming president, but if they have a son he can be president even if he's a total dirtbag.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe after you remove the two party system and lobbyists and have all votes count the same...A person who happens to be a woman can become president. Because if you think sex is the main reason why no woman was elected in modern time...You would be missing what is actually wrong... Look at Europe for inspiration maybe? And please understand why i said "happens to be a woman" If you want to elect a leader because of their genitals it is no better than what those parents do to their poor kids...

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    Mavis
    Community Member
    10 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Forgive my ignorance but does this mean both parents didnt know the gender? But yeah the party planner knows. The whole thing is weird.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it India where they have a shortage of women, so not every golden son can find a wife? And they still treat the girls as garbage there. It would be goid if these societies would get their dream of only sons. They will automatically fade out. Unless they go and abduct women.

    Socks Thecate
    Community Member
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have never been to a gender reveal party and likely just wouldn't if I was ever invited to one. I guess this reaction of the parents is why China has 110 males to every 100 females.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And of those 100 women a lot are educated, independent and have decided that they only want someone as educated and financially stable as them, soooo...cry me a river, golden boys. It seems you are going to remain single.

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    Petra Peitsch
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor baby-girl! Whatever she did in one of her previous lifes, didn't deserve to be born in this family of 1000-star-mnorons.

    UKGrandad
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Weird that neither parent - at least one of whom would have had to have been present when the sex was determined by an ultrasound scan - or any of their relatives knew the sex but a party planner did. Somebody had to tell her...unless she went along to the scan with the mother-to-be, which would have been odd to say the least.

    Dre Mosley
    Community Member
    7 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even the woman who's credited with starting the whole gender reveal party thing wishes she hadn't.

    Adz86
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Both these people need to be sent to a discount vet for desexing. Scumbag humans.

    Pedro Badan
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well the parents-to-be are obviously both complete asshats who should never have been allowed to breed, but geez, who on earth thought it would be a great idea to repeatedly "reveal" the truw gender and then "reveal" you were lying and then "reveal" a different true gender and then "reveal" you were lying again, ad infinitum? This idiotic event could only possibly have ended in tears of frustration and disappointment, in my opinion.

    ABC no seven FCK CENSORING
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm disgusted that some of the comments here are even worse than the story they are written under. Holy smokes, I'm out.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would you wait until a public party if you cared what sex your baby is? Why wouldn't you ask the doctor? Those poor kids, they'll be punished for not being boys or just ignored in favour of their brother if he appears. What horrible people.

    Rdj
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought this was fake, cause I always assumed they knew the gender. They tell you with the 20 week ultrasound. I thought they just threw a party to let the others know too. They don't know themselves?

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    Tams21
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If someone even thinks they might love a child less because of their gender then they simply shouldn't have kids. Even if they get their wish, those are often the kind of parents who hold their kids to their own unrealistic and unfair expectations.

    Say No to Downvoting
    Community Member
    8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not just for their gender but anything: disability, sexually, interests and skills. If you want a preppy, straight boy that’s a sports fanatic, will you still love a viral that’s a lesbian goth artist?

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    Panda Kicki
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still better then doing a late abortion when finding out the sex isnt what you wanted. Hete people want girls and I know three cases of that happening with baby boys.

    Lady Miss Pie
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 hour ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are these people, Henry VIII? Who cares if it’s a boy or girl? Good lord

    Beth Wheeler
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They are so stupid, either tell people what you're having or put it on the baby shower invitations.

    Hey!
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think the party planner was a completely douche and a jerk. You don't play with people's mind like that. Even if didn't mind one way or the other, you don't play ping pong with it; anyone would have been upset playing that game.

    Alyssa Phillips
    Community Member
    2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe down voted but story time. I have 3 children. The first one we had a traditional shower. The second we found out was the opposite sex so we had a "sprinkle" (mother's idea)-a sked for clothes and diapers only. The third we had a gender reveal--really just an excuse to celebrate. Nothing fancy, the cake inside was pink and we asked for diapers and wipes only. Mainly we had a party without asking for massive gifts since it was baby number 3.

    WonderWoman
    Community Member
    5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When were gender reveals ever acceptable? They are a stupid money and attention grab for pathetic people. That there are "planners" for such stupidity I suppose isn't too surprising - even circuses need people to sweep up the elephant poop.

    Tristan J
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    1: you should not have a gender reveal party knowing that one of the two options is undesirable to you. 2: other people making poor choices should not remind you why you don't have kids

    Cecilie Hammershøy
    Community Member
    7 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Somebody should tell them that's the sperm that determined the gender, so she's not broken.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For God's sake, when and why did we move from 'we are happy and grateful for our child' to ' I want/need/require/ a boy/girl' ?

    ArchangelLoki
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mum always joked that if I'd been a boy she would have left me at the hospital, but I know full well that it is a JOKE and she would have loved me just the same. These parents are unhinged.

    Joe Reaves
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you want to go the gender reveal route with a cake or something just as a fun celebration it's fine, whatever makes you happy, but you can't do it if you deeply care about the gender one way or the other because there's a 50/50chance you're going to be disappointed in front of everyone. And if your kids are already old enough to understand and you're disappointed because the new baby is the same gender as them you're going to f**k them up! If your idea of a gender reveal involves anything more complicated than a cake or a balloon with confetti (which you better do indoors and clean up yourself), you're insane. And if you're going to try and build a confetti cannon, do some research on the difference between that and a freaking pipe bomb because there are so many stories where someone has basically built a pipe bomb and the gender reveal ends up in the ER or the morgue.

    Rafael
    Community Member
    10 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a son last year. Didn't wanted this gender reveal b******t, but my wife wanted an excuse for party and presents, so we got one. But we knew the gender beforehand, and we did a simply 3d tic tac toe out of cardboard and styrofoam. Not gonna lie I would like to have a boy and a girl, but that isn't the top priority, I've rather have healthy, happy kids of any gender.

    Verena
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do get the down votes of this, but it is an important topic. The number and content of replies shows that.

    similarly
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was growing up, my Mom told me repeatedly that the only reason she had me was because she wanted a little girl.

    DrBronxx
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Awful, awful people. Also, gender reveals f*****g suck. Also, GENDER REVEALS F*****G SUCK.

    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I will never understand parents like that... Why have a kid if you are going to be disappointed if they are a girl or a boy??? If that means you will love your kid less... YOU SHOULD NOT BE HAVING KIDS! What if they swap when they are adults? It has the same sick energy of parents who don't want their sons to be gay because they won't have grandkids... SICK!

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