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“Paying $20K+ For Kids To Be In A Sport”: 30 Toxic Parenting Trends People Have Had Enough Of
Interview With Expert
When it comes to most things in life, it’s wise to keep an open mind and not get stuck in outdated ways of thinking. We know now that cigarettes are extremely harmful to our health, despite what doctors in the 1950s said. And it’s definitely not a good idea to drink alcohol while pregnant, even if your mother swears it was perfectly fine when she had you in the '60s.
That being said, we certainly don’t need to follow every piece of advice that pops up on the internet, especially because some can do more harm than good. Netizens have recently been discussing toxic parenting trends that future generations will probably mock, so we’ve compiled a list of them down below. Keep reading to find conversations with parenting experts Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten, Sue Atkins, host of Navigating the Digital Jungle, and Jim Mckenzie of Everything for Dads. And be sure to upvote the replies you agree with!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Not getting your child vaccinated. Children with allergies and other unique medical conditions aside, there is absolutely no legitimate, morally defensible reason other than pure ignorance for choosing not to do this if it is available in your society.
Val 3 days ago
I worked with someone who had a child that was the same age as mine. [ Toddlers ] Within around two years, his child had gotten sick and gone to the hospital about eight times. In those two years, my child had never gotten sick. Turns out he was a huge Trumper and his child had gotten ZERO vaccines since he was born. ZERO! Blew my mind.
To gain more insight into this topic, we got in touch with Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten, aka Dr. Psych Mom, parenting coach Sue Atkins, host of Navigating the Digital Jungle, and Jim Mckenzie of Everything for Dads.
They were kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and discuss some of the harmful parenting trends they've seen online.
"Over-praising and over-validating kids is a parenting trend that I find questionable," Dr. Rodman Whiten shared. "This is an era of hyperfocus on kids and obsessing over their feelings, and this is often to the detriment of the kids, who can't learn how to identify their emotions and self-soothe without parental involvement."
RELATED:
#2
Not touching your children.
I'm surprised this hasn't been mentioned more.
Kids of all ages need to feel your love. It makes them feel secure, safe, and good. If you deprive your kid of physical affection, they will seek it elsewhere… and you will not like it.
I am not exaggerating: I can not remember a single time either of my parents has hugged me or kissed me or touched me in a non-hurtful way. Not even when I was in elementary school.
I am now a high school student and sometimes I want someone to give me a reassuring touch, or feel safe in their arms; not romantically, but from an adult. I know this because I was starved from it as a child.
Love your children. Show them through actions.
Little Bit 3 days ago
I give my daughters a hug every day when they get up I the morning, when they leave for school and before bed, and a cuddle whenever they want one. I tell them that I love them every day too. Something my mother never ever did for me.
"One concerning trend is the increasing reliance on screens to occupy children," Sue added. "While technology can be a useful tool, too much screen time—especially for young kids—can interfere with sleep, language development, and real-world interactions."
"Research shows that children learn best through conversation and play, yet many are spending more time swiping than speaking," she continued. "I recently covered this on my Navigating the Digital Jungle podcast, where we discussed how screen time is replacing vital opportunities for parent-child bonding."
#3
My sis is an OD and she works with the disabled and children almost exclusively. The worst are rambunctious children who won’t sit still. You REALLY have to sit still when someone is working on your eyes. REALLY. Her secret power is she hugs the kids who won’t sit still for a minute and they melt. All they want is someone to hug them and tell them everything is okay. Some children clutch onto her like they’re drowning and she is driftwood and they start sobbing. Their parents will buy them any number of expensive electronics but won’t spend time with them or hug them or even engage them. When my sister hugs them, they are absolutely desperate for any kind of physical comfort. If you want your kid to be open to molestation, then ignore them. Never hug them. Never tell you love them. They WILL find what they need SOMEWHERE. The parents tell my sister their children can’t wait to come to the OD office. They don’t understand why. It’s because they want SOMEONE to hug them and care for them for a change and the latest iPhone doesn’t do that. We all need a hug now and then. Where is Leo Buscaglia when you need him?
Sue says another worrying trend is the way “gentle parenting” is sometimes misunderstood as avoiding discipline altogether. "Children thrive on clear boundaries, and being kind and respectful as a parent doesn’t mean saying yes to everything," she explained.
As for whether or not these trends will stick around, Sue noted, "Some trends will pass, but the bigger issues—like how we help our children manage technology and develop emotional resilience—are here to stay, which is why I talk about them so often on the podcast."
#4
"If your baby / child cries just ignore it, it's only after attention. It'll soon learn." So many people say this and think it's acceptable. If a baby or child cries you need to see what is wrong, is it hungry or thirsty? Maybe it does just want some attention. What is so wrong with a baby or child wanting attention? Pick that child up and give it a hug for goodness sake. But sometimes the child may be over tired and leaving them in peace is the best thing for the child but don't ignore them, keep an ear open and if their crying changes go and check to make sure everything is ok.
"Let’s dive into the parenting circus, shall we? 'Gentle parenting' is great in theory—until it morphs into 'zero consequences parenting,'" Jim added. "I’m all for emotional intelligence, but if a toddler is launching spaghetti at the ceiling, maybe we don’t need a 15-minute symposium on his feelings. Maybe we just take the spaghetti and save the deep discussion for when they’re older—like when they’re trying to convince you that a forehead tattoo of a dinosaur is a great life choice."
#5
Sterilizing your child's environment!!
Stop using antibacterial everything and not letting your kids play in the dirt or touch anything.
Kids need to adapt to the germs in the world they live in.
They need to get sick, and get well WITHOUT antibiotics, and build up a resistant immune system.
The world is not sterile.
Ace 3 days ago
There's evidence to support the idea that exposure to so-called 'good' bacteria allows the human gut biome to develop healthily and avoids a weakened immune system, but absolutely none to suggest that children need to get sick. In particular viral illnesses can k**l or severely damage children whereas vaccines can give the same protection without the risk.
"Then there’s the obsession with 'screen-free' everything," the father continued. "I get it—too much screen time isn’t ideal. But let’s not act like our ancestors weren’t plopping kids down in front of the village fire while they got things done. Screens aren’t the enemy—lack of discipline and balance is. It’s up to parents to teach kids how to use technology responsibly without sacrificing their mental and physical health. Otherwise, you’ll blink, and they’ll be 18, living on energy drinks, and scrolling TikTok until 3 AM."
"Will these trends stick around? Some version of them, sure," Jim says. "Parenting swings like a giant pendulum—what’s demonized today will probably be 'groundbreaking' in 20 years."
#6
Suppressing a child's curiosity. Not dangerous, perhaps, but a terrible thing.
Child of the Stars 3 days ago (edited)
But also don't lie or make up some sugar-coated fairy story because you don't feel like telling the truth. Kids are perfectly capable of processing scary topics like death or supposedly advanced topics like physics if they're presented properly. There's also no need to manipulate them into good behavior by using fairy stories like Santa. And before you @ me about how I can't possibly be a parent, I have two kids, neither of whom I've ever lied to.
#7
There is a fast spreading belief that immunization shots are a cause of autism in children. Many people on my wife's mom's forum would castigate her for telling them that this is a hoax and that there are numerous articles to disprove this. They would say things like "my first kid got immunized and he is now autistic whereas my second child didn't and she is fine." Sure, they are well-meaning people and you can parent your child however you wish, but if you're spreading misinformation to other parents you're putting their children's lives at risk.
Scary how many people can believe a lie and assume it to be true.
KnightOwl 3 days ago (edited)
I hate this justification it's so ignorant and ableist. I have 9 autistic neices and nephews, they are all very intelligent and unique and we wouldn't change them for anything, the idea that people would rather risk their kid dying or getting seriously ill than being like them is infuriating and extremely offensive.
We also asked the experts why there are so many parenting trends emerging all the time.
"New trends pop up because people want to do better than their own parents, and fix any deficits that they saw in their own upbringings," Dr. Rodman Whiten shared. "For example, if you were left alone too much as a kid, you may swing to the other extreme and never give your child a minute of alone time. The intentions are good, but parenting in 180 degree opposition to how you were parented will be dysfunctional as well."
#8
Do not publicly shame or humiliate your child as a form of punishment.
It's normal for kids to screw up, and it's embarrassing enough to be caught by your parents for doing something you're less than proud of without them broadcasting it to a bunch of other people. This can have devastating effects on a child's self esteem by engraining in them the idea that they are a "bad child." The child will internalize feelings of worthlessness and shame, especially knowing that others know about everything they've done wrong (and often don't hear about the things they've done right).
Please, respect your child enough to have an open and honest (and private) discussion with them when they mess up. This allows from them to learn from the experience and try to do better in the future.
"Trends come and go because every generation faces new challenges," Sue noted. "Social media has made this even more intense, with TikTok and Instagram full of bite-sized parenting advice—some of it great, some of it misleading."
"That said, parents don’t need to keep changing their approach to stay 'up to date,'" the expert added. "The fundamentals—love, security, boundaries, and connection—don’t go out of style. I always encourage parents to focus on what works for their family rather than feeling pressured to follow every new trend."
#9
Not holding kids responsible for their actions. Children need to learn there are consequences for their actions. Sheilding them from the fallout of misbehavior is a disaster-in-the-making.
"Convenience" parenting - not paying attention to the child's needs because it interferes with the parents desires. Most little ones crying in stores are bored, hungry or need a nap. Shop at a different time or leave them with a sitter! Taking kids to inappropriate movies, allowing them to watch graphic scenes on television. Taking children to sporting or other entertainment events on school nights and keeping them out way past their bed time. Kids get a lot of blame for what are poor and selfish parenting decisions.
The Darkest Timeline 2 days ago
I’ve had young students tell me they stay up until 10 or 11 on school nights so of course they’re tired. I blame the parents, 100%.
Jim also pointed out that parenting is like fashion. "Every generation looks back and cringes at what came before," he shared. "'Wait, you let your kids roam the neighborhood unsupervised? Were you TRYING to get them kidnapped?' Meanwhile, our parents were like, 'Come back when the streetlights turn on.'”
"And let’s be real—social media has turned parenting into a competitive sport," he added. "Someone on Instagram figures out a 'revolutionary' way to get their toddler to eat vegetables, and suddenly, we’re all supposed to be spiraling cucumbers into rose shapes."
#10
My husband and I have had 7 children. The first 6 came in a span of 10 years (1997–2007) and our youngest, number 7, is 10 months old. He was a delightful surprise in 2015.
The trends raising our youngest have certainly changed in the 18 years since my oldest was a baby. I didn’t even have a cell phone then! We used VCR tapes, cassettes of Barney were in the tape deck in the van, Wii only meant 'we'….
The dangerous trend I have observed in more recent years is not being there. Oh as a mom of many I am “there”, but sometimes not really THERE. So my number one suggestion is be there- in the moment- with your child. Put your phone down- look into their beautiful eyes and listen to them. Here’s why… you will blink and your little one will be an adult.
I feel like this last little blessing has taught me sooo much about the passing of time.
Not to waste it on my phone- reading about the lives of others while the ones around me need me, want to talk to me and really would love for their mommy (or daddy) to just look them in the eyes when they ask even a simple question.
With our seventh I feel like he has been an eye opener for us. Thankfully we still have young ones and I am a mom who is still learning.
"Also, social media has created this illusion that there’s a quick fix for everything," Jim continued. "Parenting isn’t a hack—it’s an 18-year (minimum) full-time job with no days off. After 30 years of parenting, I can tell you: it takes sustained, everyday effort to raise good humans."
"Do parents need to reinvent the wheel constantly? No. But should they be open to learning and adapting? Absolutely," the father noted. "Parenting is both a science and an art. The basics—love, discipline, boundaries, and keeping them alive while somehow functioning on five hours of sleep—haven’t changed. But staying open to actual research (not just TikTok trends) can make life easier for both parents and kids."
#11
Thinking obedience is a virtue.
Obedience is NOT a virtue. If you raise obedient children you are raising obedient adults. You want to raise someone who asks questions. You want to raise someone who sees the world differently. You want to raise someone who knows you have good reasons and are willing to explain them. You do NOT want to raise someone who does it "Because I said so!"
Someday that kid will have a boss/friend/partner who tells them to do something bad. Do you want them to have the "Because he said to" mindset or pause and think?
#12
This is coming from a teen myself so I may not be qualified to answer this but when your kids get older remember to listen to them. We definitely are not always right but listen to our opinion as equal adults. You don't have to agree with us but just listen. I guarantee it makes your kid view you as a respectful serene human, not just their crazy mom. It's a trend I see to downplay how your kids are feeling or their opinions to make them think whatever they're gong through is not a big deal. However this does not work. It's makes your kid feel isolated.
Child of the Stars 3 days ago
I heard someone say once that if you listen to the little stuff when they're little, they'll tell you about the big stuff when they're big because to them, it's always been the big stuff.
The parenting experts also shared some wise words for any parents out there who aren't sure which advice they should trust.
"Look at the source – Is the advice coming from child development experts, or just going viral? Think long-term – Will this trend help your child grow into a confident, independent person?" Sue asks. "Trust your instincts – If something doesn’t sit right with you, there’s probably a good reason. [And] stay informed – I cover these kinds of topics on my podcast, helping parents cut through the noise and focus on what really matters."
#13
1. Not modelling good behavior for your children - expecting them to do what you say, not what you do. Kids sense the hypocracy and lose respect.
2. Not teaching critical thinking skills.
3. Being too germophobic. See "hygiene hypothesis".
4. Raising your kids just like you were raised because it "worked", or conversely, doing everything the opposite because it didn't. Take the good and reject the bad.
5. Parents fighting too many of the kid's battles for them, like arguing with teachers over grades, doing the kids homework or school projects for them, navigating the child's social relationships etc... It is tough, but there is a fine line between helping a child and taking over.
onelife 3 days ago
raising your kids how other's are raising them. My Sister's co-sister and her husband constantly compare their kid's with hers. Ear piercing, hobby classes, hair cuts , food, vacations every thing is a competition and comparison. It is one thig look at other parents and learning good parenting tips and whole another level to make your kids have same hair cuts coz the parents did it.
"Overall, the best approach is to be moderate and assume that if you are parenting out of anxiety, your judgement may be compromised," Dr. Rodman Whiten noted. "Kids are resilient, but they need calm and confident parents."
"Any parenting trend that requires so much energy and focus that it takes up all of your time and makes you tired and anxious is not a healthy one. Kids need to see happy, calm parents," she continued. "So a parenting trend that makes you feel as though you need to be monitoring your behavior or your kids' behavior 24/7 is one to steer away from!"
#14
I have a couple I'd like to mention. One is letting kids spend too much time with technology. Another is not talking to their kids about sex, waiting too long to talk to them about sex, or teaching them that sex is shameful. These "abstinence only" school programs drive me nuts. Let's get real about human nature.
Jim has broken his tips down into a few simple steps. "Step one: If advice makes you feel like a terrible parent for doing something completely normal (like using a stroller, babywearing, or giving your kid a timeout), take a deep breath and move on," he shared. "Step two: Consider the source. If it’s coming from a random influencer whose only credential is 'mom of three,' maybe double-check with, you know, actual experts."
"Step three: Look at your kid. Seriously. Not every method works for every child," he continued. "Parenting isn’t one-size-fits-all, and no internet trend should override common sense. Try new techniques with an open mind, but if something clearly isn’t working, don’t be afraid to scrap it."
#15
Personally, I’m really against hitting. I’m thinking some readers might think “yeah, well, your kid is only 2”, but I really hope I have the courage of my convictions and never hit my daughter.
Secure attachment is really important to me, and hitting damages that. Studies also show that hitting doesn’t lead to better behavioural outcomes. We teach our kids that violence is wrong, and we’re not allowed to hit adults, so I really feel like it shouldn’t be okay to hit kids either.
Also, I feel like if I hit my daughter, I’m telling her that it’s okay for someone to hit her. Not something I want her to internalize for when she’s an adult.
It’s still unfortunately very much normalized in our society though.
Another trend imho is figuratively wrapping one’s kid up in bubble wrap: if they’re only starting to make decisions when they’re adults and don’t have you there to fall back on in the same way, they might make terrible decisions. Overprotection can really backfire.
Of course, there’s the other side of the spectrum where people don’t even know where their kids are half the time, so a little balance is needed!
Luke Branwen 3 days ago
People who think it's okay to commit violence on small, defenseless, developing human beings who are entirely dependant on them, both materially and emotionally, are subhuman to me. Subhuman. I'm no longer pulling punches.
"At the end of the day, good parenting isn’t about trends—it’s about raising a decent human who feels loved, respected, and secure," Jim added. "And who occasionally eats a vegetable without a 45-minute negotiation."
If you'd like to hear even more advice from Jim, be sure to visit Everything for Dads or Relationships Rebuilt!
#16
Social media disengagement.
About 80 percent of parents I see at the park are on cell phones, kindleand such as there kids play and at times seek to draw their parents attention.
Janeymc 3 days ago
It’s totally crazy. I know the playground is not fun for parents. I’ve been there. And I don’t see any huge problem with reading a book if your kids are busy playing, especially if other kids there. But it’s having your kids see you on the phone in every single environment. They are growing up thinking that is what life is. That’s what adults do. I am reading now instead of the phone. Papers, books, magazines. I’m not planning on smart phones for mine til they’re 16. So I better walk the walk. It’s hard but I can’t hand them the potential of major mental health problems. I feel enough regular mother guilt already 😆
Finally, Sue says, "Parenting isn’t about following every new trend—it’s about knowing your child and making thoughtful choices. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by all the advice out there, join me on Navigating the Digital Jungle, where I break these issues down with real-life examples, expert insights, and practical solutions."
#17
Overloading their lives with stupid activities. Life is not a freaking competition, it's just about being happy and playing around :)
The Darkest Timeline 2 days ago
Define “stupid activities.” Just because you don’t think it’s worthwhile doesn’t mean others agree. And why can kids not be happy doing them?
#18
To me, the very worst, most dangerous thing a parent can do - even without realizing it (and I admit occasional guilt) - is to simply not listen to what your child is saying to you. To tune them out as white noise that is competing with what you would rather pay attention to. When I realized that I was doing this, I was shocked and disgusted with myself, because that's what my parents did to me, when I was young. After realizing this terrible habit, I adjusted. Now, regardless how minor, ridiculous, irrelevant, or whimsical, I listen to everything my children say with undivided attention.
The thing that really snapped me out of that rut was the fact that my daughters have lost 3 of their friends, this year alone, to suicide. The chief complaint among those three, before they left? They felt neglected by their parents. Just unwanted baggage. I never want my children to feel that. It is unavoidable that a parent will make their child feel that way, simply by denying them something they really, really think they need. But, that's not the same thing... and they realize that. But, when parents dismiss their children with a nod, a "mm hmm", and a wave of the hand, how else are they to feel? So, I made it a point to be attentive. It can be difficult, especially when the conversion consists of 12 1/2 minutes of "My Little Pony" fan fiction... but it's important to her. Because of that, I give her that ear to show that she's important to me.
Luke Branwen 3 days ago
That's a difference between genuinely good parents and people who had kids more or less out of obligation.
#19
Trying to parent alone. More and more parents and families are isolated from their neighbors, their extended families, their friends, their support. We think we have to know everything, be able to handle anything and never ask for help. Its insane. And not only is it insane but it keeps your children from having experiences outside of your home, or your created environment.
They miss that crazy Auntie who yes, may give them more sugar than you like, but also speaks French and Spanish to your child and shows them the delight in experiencing another culture. They won't get to know 80 year old Gladys who lives at the end of the block,who while they help her prune her roses tells them stories of another time from her childhood in Brooklyn. They miss the flavor of actually living and breathing in their world. They miss their village.
And we as parents miss OUR village. We miss the Mom we can commiserate with over another sleepless night, who also has on a stained shirt and is wearing a Dora the Explorer sticker on her knee because that is high as her toddler could get it. We miss the sage wisdom from our elders who raised healthy, happy, successful children who slept on non-organic sheets, drank from the garden hose and were allowed to chase the ice cream truck around the corner without fear that they would not come back.
The world is a curious place and we are meant to experience it. Sometimes that means not being able to control everything, but it seems to me, that in that release of control, sometimes, sometimes, we have our most rich and memorable experiences yet. Don't you think our children, and we, deserve that? A colorful, tiresome, flavorful, go until your legs cramp and you lay in the grass looking at the clouds without worrying about what pesticide may seep through your clothes experience. I know I do.
Little Bit 3 days ago
Not everybody has family or decent neighbours. My mum was one of 7 siblings so when i was a kid I was never short of aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, great aunts, uncles etc. We all lived close by and where I grew up the neighbours were like extended family. I have no siblings and my hubby has a sister, some nephews and nieces but they live too far away. We don't see them often. We don't see that much of our neighbours because we all work full time. All but one of our elder family members had passed away before our kids were old enough to remember them. We've had to parent alone because we've had no choice. Times have changed. People tend to interact on social media rather than in person
#20
As somebody's child, and now also three people's mother, my only answer to this is: expecting your children to provide you happiness and to take care of you in your old age. My mother placed constant pressure on me as a child that it was going to be my job to look after her when she got older. (Which as it turned out never happened as she died at 60 of ALS). She was a single mother and always made me feel that I was the only thing in her life that could make her happy. This is too much pressure for a child, and ultimately a very selfish expectation. In the end it pushed me to the other end of the spectrum, moving to a different country, away from her. My children bring me great happiness. But I do not EXPECT this from them. Nor do I expect them to take care of me and my husband when we grow old. With any luck we will have raised them with the right morals and to be kind enough to do what they feel is right in their lives. That's my job.
Little Bit 3 days ago
I've always said that the day I can no longer take care of myself is the day I want it to end. I don't want to be a burden to my daughters, the healthcare system or society.
#21
Parents find it easy to let the school, teachers, classmates, TV, and movies shape the personal characters and values of their children.
The children learn both the right and the wrong without being able to distinguish between them. How could they while being exposed to everything for the first time in their life? They need to be coached by who has the knowledge, experience, and cares about their wellbeing and future. Only the parents, out of their love, have the children best interest in their hearts.
Parents have the responsibility of protecting their children from the ills of the society and helping them be good citizens.
keyboardtek 3 days ago
You cannot protect them from the ills of the world so you have to prepare them by education and caution. Instead of saying NO and STAY AWAY FROM SUCH AND SUCH, teach them that they at some point will encounter all this and here is how to deal with the dangers. Preparation for the dangers of the world works far better than trying to protect them from ever being exposed to those dangers.
#22
The Tiger Mom Approach: Teaching your children not to play and be creative. Teaching them that they are only loved if they have performed succesfully. Draining them of self-esteem and teaching them not to enjoy life.
(The alternative to the Tiger Mom Approach is not indulgence and lack of discipline. Giving your child love and joy can easily be combined with authority and teaching them to make an effort.)
#23
A dangerous practice I have seen is the parent/s living through their children.
#24
Setting the expectation that everything must be fun for the child, at all times.
The opposite - the Tiger mom approach.
Both extremes are terrible.
The Darkest Timeline 2 days ago
As a teacher, it is exhausting to think I have to make every second of class “fun” (read: entertaining). A lot of what we do is hard work that requires focus, attention to detail, and discipline and, frequently, the fun comes AFTER they’ve done that.
#25
Not teaching them to take personal responsibility for their actions. It is never correct to say somebody else did/said something and therefore justifying "It's not MY fault!"
We are all responsible for our own actions, choices, habits, friends, and attitudes. There are extreme exceptions in 1% of the cases, but not every day, all the time.
Ergo, "We are not ALL winners, with no losers!"
The Darkest Timeline 2 days ago
In America, we have a president that never, EVER takes responsibility unless it’s something that earns him the adulation of the fascists that support him. Anything negative that happens is always someone else’s fault and if they dare point out his many shortcomings or endless mistakes, they’re labeled a “hater” or “loser” or “failure.” I’ve rarely seen someone so thin-skinned and insecure but I guess it took someone like him to lead people that STILL can’t get over their ideological brethren losing the civil war.
#26
Helicopter parenting: Not letting a kid learn how to take care of him/herself, make decisions for him/herself, or deal with consequences.
Not respecting their kids' privacy when they need it.
Overposting about their kids on Facebook and other social media.
Too many "mama/papa bears" who overreact when someone else takes it upon him/herself to correct their kids or stop them from doing harm, but don't discipline their kids themselves.
#27
1. Too little downtime together as a family. This is what gives your child the roots and skills they need to get through the challenges in life.
2. Love them for who they are. Many parents are too stingy with expressing appreciation, acceptance & validation of their children.
3. Children are not possessions; don't use them to express yourself.
If you get it right, they'll come to you when the going gets rough, but you have to make sure they KNOW you're a good listener.
#28
Not teaching a child how to swim.
cerinamroth 3 days ago
Interestingly, this is even mentioned in the Talmud (collection of ancient Jewish texts) as an absolute must-do!
#29
“You're big now. Big girls/boys don't cry.”
This one is especially crippling. As a kid, all you want to do is fill the shoes set for you, and even if they are awkwardly shaped or hurt your feet when you put them on, you will do your best to suck it up and deal with it, thinking ‘hey, if other kids can do it then so can I'.
Problem is, other kids most probably feel the same way. Then who, you might ask, has set up this example for kids? Simple. Parents who will do anything to stop their children from disturbing their calmness, even if it means restricting their emotions and risking irreversible psychological damage.
So please, please, if you have a child, take a moment every day to discuss their feelings and I daresay let them cry if they feel like doing so. That way, you'll teach them a valuable lesson, and that is crying doesn't show weakness, but shows that you've been strong for too long.
#30
ipads replacing attention !
Poll Question
Do you think future generations will mock current parenting trends?
Yes, trends change constantly
No, some trends are timeless
It depends on the trends
It's hard to predict
What do you think ?
Lee Gilliland 2 days ago
Respect your kids. They are people, and as such have the right to disagree. And if you respect them, they will return the favor.
Child of the Stars 3 days ago
There's a lot of judgement in so many of these. I'm on my phone a lot when out and about with my kids. But I'm rarely just doomscrolling or something. My kids are big science nerds (my 12yo about biology and environment, my 6yo about space and dinosaurs); I use my phone a LOT to find answers or to make plans to visit the local natural history museum or observatory or something. But you know what? Sometimes, after picking my youngest up from school, he just doesn't feel up to talking about space or telling me about his day or just talking in general. So yeah, I might spend the bus ride home scrolling BP. And the post about how hitting the grocery store when the kid is tired or hungry is just a convenience thing for the parent. Maybe it's not, maybe it's a necessary and practical decision to hit the store at that particular time. Making judgements on someone's parenting based on a single snapshot of their day that you just happened to catch just makes you seem petty.
Little Bit 1 day ago
1. Never ridicule your child about the things they enjoy. 2. If your child tells you something in confidence, no matter how trivial or silly it might be, keep that confidence. If you post it all over social media or tell all your friends and relatives, then your child will think that you can't be trusted and then you'll wonder why they never tell you anything. 3. Your child is not a scapegoat for everything that goes wrong in your life. They do not deserve to be yelled at (or worse) and blamed for things that are not their fault, things that are beyond their control, things they don't know about , things that you've done wrong, and things that happened before they were even born.
Lee Gilliland 2 days ago
Respect your kids. They are people, and as such have the right to disagree. And if you respect them, they will return the favor.
Child of the Stars 3 days ago
There's a lot of judgement in so many of these. I'm on my phone a lot when out and about with my kids. But I'm rarely just doomscrolling or something. My kids are big science nerds (my 12yo about biology and environment, my 6yo about space and dinosaurs); I use my phone a LOT to find answers or to make plans to visit the local natural history museum or observatory or something. But you know what? Sometimes, after picking my youngest up from school, he just doesn't feel up to talking about space or telling me about his day or just talking in general. So yeah, I might spend the bus ride home scrolling BP. And the post about how hitting the grocery store when the kid is tired or hungry is just a convenience thing for the parent. Maybe it's not, maybe it's a necessary and practical decision to hit the store at that particular time. Making judgements on someone's parenting based on a single snapshot of their day that you just happened to catch just makes you seem petty.
Little Bit 1 day ago
1. Never ridicule your child about the things they enjoy. 2. If your child tells you something in confidence, no matter how trivial or silly it might be, keep that confidence. If you post it all over social media or tell all your friends and relatives, then your child will think that you can't be trusted and then you'll wonder why they never tell you anything. 3. Your child is not a scapegoat for everything that goes wrong in your life. They do not deserve to be yelled at (or worse) and blamed for things that are not their fault, things that are beyond their control, things they don't know about , things that you've done wrong, and things that happened before they were even born.
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