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“I Ruined His Life”: 30 People Confess To The Most Morally Questionable Things They’ve Done
Look, nobody’s perfect. We’re all human beings, and we all make mistakes. (Some more than others!) But whether you believe in objective morality or think that norms are all a byproduct of the society we live in, you can’t deny that some behaviors are a bit iffy and fall into a very gray area.
These are behaviors that you might be so scared of being judged on that you’d never admit to them aloud… unless you were protected by anonymity. Case in point, some members of the popular r/AskReddit community opened up about the most morally questionable things that they’d ever done. Read on for their candid stories.
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#1
Wiped the hard drive on the work desktop. Every tool, spreadsheet, database and how-to guide required to do the job just gone in a blink.
I literally wrote the book on how to do that job and how the training is delivered and systems implemented across the entire company, most of which I had to do in my own time as it was seen as a “waste of time”. I effectively automated processes that took hours to do manually and brought efficiency from 13% to 98%. And yet when the time came to give me the promotion they promised, they brought in someone new to the company and said that I had to train them.
Pulled the plug on the operation and handed in my notice. The department folded less than 3 months after I left as no one knew what they were doing and had no backup or go-to help anymore.
A little corporate espionage but f**k ‘em.
Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 1 month ago
I don't see anything wrong with this - companies should absolutely suffer karma too.
RELATED:
#2
I got laid off in 2009 and couldn't find work for almost 2 years. Found a job in the industry I loved (motorcycles) and they took advantage of my obvious desperation. Came in as an operations coordinator at $11/hr after 4 yrs working as a business analyst, directly under a VP at Citrix.
Worked my a*s off and, within 6 mo, was doing the job of an operations manager/analyst. I developed/supported the backbone of nearly every department's analytics. My manager didn't like me b/c she saw me as a threat to her job. Her boss's boss, the COO, knew the value I offered for practically nothing. So, being the good executive leader she was, blocked every attempt at promotions or department transfer opportunity that came my way - IT, marketing, and HR all made attempts to create jobs for me after seeing the quality/value of my work in projects I did for them.
After 18 months, and threats to quit, I was up to $40k/yr. Less than half of what the HR team's market analysis calculated my pay should be based on our location and my role, scope, and responsibilities. (I know about it because the HR director *showed it to me* after I'd started working with them extensively on their departmental analytics and had developed a very close relationship. She then mentioned that the COO told her, "So what? He makes what he makes" after HR informed the COO I was making a fraction of my fair market value) By this point, my self confidence had started to reestablish itself and my resentment of my department, boss, and COO had festered into a roiling fire.
Then I did a favor for the warehouse manager. I built an Excel/Access time and attendance tool since the one we'd been using didn't work well for warehouse staff. It was super accurate, handle OT and respected the big labor laws around lunch requirements. In vetting the accuracy I found that the company was applying CA law to stores in every state. I saved the company $75k/year when I called it out. In an attempt to get to my HR-established market rate, I asked for a bonus/pay increase for having saved them 2x my salary... per year. Their reply, "Saving the company money is part of your job. If you ask for a raise again you'll be written up and possibly fired"
I'd had enough. I found another, much better job at a niche distributor in the industry and, on my way out, contacted the DOL and informed them (with receipts) of:
* Severe wage theft by the company.
* Employer intimidation and retaliation against whistle blowing
* Wage/job discrimination against several employees and myself
The company was forced to pay ~$2million in back pay and $3million in fines.
Morally, nothing wrong with what I did above... the morally questionable part is meticulously breaking all automation I'd created 3.5months before I left. ALL of the (now business critical) reporting I'd built was hard-coded. No formulas. When they asked me to train someone to take over, I said no problem... trained him to do it manually, which took 20-30hrs/week vs 1-2.
A few months later the HR director let me know my job was posted again. At $95-110k/year. I notified the DOL and shared all the documents of my responsibility/market adjustment requests, the HR job analysis, and an email comment from the COO that she didn't feel I was worth market rate since I have only 1-arm. I never saw a cent but the company was, again, fined substantially and the COO was immediately fired.
F**k you, Tracy.
#3
I deleted the files to a project I had spent the last year working on when I found out that I was going to get let go at the end of the project. Basically, they had hired me to do this project and planned to fire me when they no longer needed me (not that I was actually told this at the time of my hiring).
Soo yeah. When I got word from other office staff that I was to be let go, I took my company laptop home, and I wiped everything. When they fired me the next day, little did they know, all of that work was gone. They had just the bare bones of the project and had to have someone else completely rebuild it in autocad.
F**k em.
Moral behavior is something that is accepted to be right in the society you live in. So, somebody who’s said to possess a good moral compass knows the difference between right and wrong and strives to do good things. What you decide to do when presented with a dilemma will reveal tomes about your character, values, and motivations.
Of course, as we’ve probably all experienced, life isn’t as simple as what you can see in movies or read in books. Telling good from evil can be very hard when there are so many complex motivations working against each other. To oversimplify things, you have to weigh what’s good for you personally versus what’s best for your social circle versus what society finds useful versus what the world needs.
#4
I don't have a problem admitting it in real life because the statute of limitations has long-since expired, but..
My boss at a PC repair shop emptied the payroll account to buy himself a brand new BMW, so all of his employees quit. But I decided that if he wasn't willing to pay me in money he damned sure was going to pay me in inventory, so I walked out with enough parts to build me a new PC (somewhat more than my paycheck would've been, but PC parts don't pay the rent so I charged a 'conversion fee'.).
#5
I told my grandmother that I needed $300 for an abortion, but in reality, I wanted it for h*roin. She gave it to me, and never said another word about it. That was 20 years ago. I've been clean for two years now, and I think about that lie every single day. I'll never forgive myself.
I love it here 1 month ago
I'm so sorry... I feel your pain. Stuff like that just doesn't go away
#6
When I was around 8-10, I was riding my bike with friends. We stopped at an apartment building (4-5 floors) to wait for one of our friends.
My friends started talking about a girl, about how much they dislike her. I had no idea who they were talking about, but didn’t want to be “left out” so I joined, and started saying mean things, like how stinky she was, and how ugly, and I think I even called her a pig, or something like that.
I was saying all that very loud (basically shouting), to make sure I’m louder than everyone else, so my friends would hear me and laugh (and they did…).
Well, it turned out we were waiting for my friend under that girl’s window, like exactly under it. The window was on the second floor, but it was hot outside so it was open.
Needless to say, the girl heard everything… her mom had to come down and send us away because she was crying so hard.
I wish I could go back and beat my stupid 8-year-old self.
You could apply that framework of your versus others' needs to every single small decision that you make, but you’d probably end up overwhelmed and burned out. So, it helps to have general moral guidelines and frameworks to follow. These can be religious, cultural, legal, ideological, etc., with their own nuances, dogmas, and inconsistencies. One of the deepest literary ironies is that antagonists in stories strive to do good, as they understand it. However, their perception and vision clashes with that of the society around them.
Someone who is said to be immoral also knows the difference between right and wrong, as per Writer’s Digest. However, unlike a moral individual, the immoral person will choose to do the wrong thing, regardless. In short, they’re aware that their behavior goes against cultural norms and the understanding of what’s good. For example, someone who knows that lying is wrong but decides to lie anyway to improve their situation is acting immorally.
#7
Was let go from my first job for making my boss look bad for finishing daily tasks too quickly, and being open about the division not being efficient. He made an example of me so others would back off. So when the company asked me to come in for an exit interview, I told them I had nothing to say but to follow my boss outside at lunch to the parking lot if you fancy an interesting view.
He was arrested for possession and distribution of c*caine, got a year in jail and life pretty much ruined. I bumped into him about 3 months after he was released while walking around a mall, and he told me I ruined his life, which I then came back and said "you had me fired for trying to make the company better, cheers."
Felt bad he got the year in jail, and looked like hell, but....
#8
Sent an unsolicited d**k pic once. Never did before in my life and haven't since. I was at a very low point and hate myself for doing it. I apologized profusely and got lucky she was cool about it, we're actually good friends now, but i still regret it.
Just don't do it guys.
StarCrossedFriday 1 month ago
I’m actually proud of the guy for having the awareness he has - plenty of men never got that far 🫤
#9
My ex husband was a serial cheater. I stayed faithful for so long, tried marriage counseling multiple times, did anything and everything to please him. The last time I caught him cheating something snapped. I felt nothing for him except pure hate. So I decided to start cheating as well. Only, I didn’t chose randoms. Over the course of a year I slept with every single one of his close friends.
I thought about telling him when we finally ended things. The look on his face would have given me so much satisfaction. However I kept it to myself. Now seeing him still hanging out with the very men who were so willing to sleep with his wife is all the satisfaction I need.
Meanwhile, an amoral individual is someone who operates outside the confines of morality. They do not understand the difference between what’s right and what’s wrong, and they don’t care about these concepts at all.
The easiest comparison to make would be to say that robots or natural disasters are amoral. The former do what they’re programmed to do. The latter are simply part of the natural world.
#10
When I was in my early teens, my brother and I were shooting airsoft guns in our backyard. We saw a lizard start crawling up the side of the house and he bet me that I couldn't hit it. Brotherly rivalry blinded me and I went for it.
I was able to hit it first try (figured I'd miss since it was about 20 meters away), killed it instantly. I walked up to it and felt instant regret...18 years later I still feel remorse killing that lizard.
Sorry lizard...I'm torturing myself emotionally in repentance 18 years later...
Sand Ers 1 month ago
There’s a bunch more in the thread over there. I have one of my own. I was carrying a BB gun, but all I ever shot with it were cans, and 1-inch green plastic army men. I saw a bird land in a bush that had to be at least 30 feet away. I didn’t even aim - just raised the gun at waist level, and fired into the bush intending to disturb the leaves and make it fly out. Somehow I hit it right in the head. The only good part is that it broke its neck and killed it instantly. That was somewhere around 1976. I still feel it.
#11
In my early twenties, our apartment got burglarized. Most of what they took wasn't very valuable, but I had two silver pocket watches I inherited from my grandpa, that probably would have fetched $3000 combined.
The problem was that my renters insurance policy limited jewelry losses to $1000.
Conveniently, my roommate had lost a really expensive 35mm camera and his insurance policy only covered $1000 for it. He also worked at a computer store.
So I gave him documentation on one of the pocket watches, and he gave me a backdated fake receipt for a computer.
We were both able to adjust our claims and get extra money out of our insurance companies to help with our losses.
Thank god we used different insurance companies at the time!
StarCrossedFriday 1 month ago
Well, since insurance companies go out of their way to screw people in general, I’d say a one-time screwing back isn’t so bad.
#12
I had a d**g addict uncle who kept getting let out of jail. He was trying to rob granny's house. I told him I had a one-time job that was six hours away. I drove six hours away stopped at gas station and gave him fifty bucks to go get snacks. Then I drove off and left him.
Falafal salad 1 month ago
Um, he’s an adult human, not a dog. Pretty sure he could find a way to get back.
If you feel like you’d like to be a bit vulnerable, dear Pandas, feel free to share in the comments the most morally dubious things you’ve ever done.
What are some of the biggest moral dilemmas that you’ve personally found yourselves in? Why did you decide to do what you did? Have you ever had to atone for something that you deeply regretted? We’d like to hear about what you’ve been through.
#13
D**gged my step dad when I was 14 with ambien in his drink because my nana told me to. He was a violent man but when I say he slept for 2.5 days I mean it.
#14
My friend confided in me that her dad was SAing her. She cried and begged me not to tell anyone. I was scared, sad, and wanted her to trust me with this big secret so I didn't tell anybody. A year later her dad got caught (no idea the circumstances), and he was arrested and sent to prison for a long time. I feel so bad about it. If only I had told somebody, told my parents, told a police officer or SOMETHING, I could've saved her from another year of torture. I can't bring myself to talk to anybody about it. I don't know how to forgive myself for that.
#15
I was a math tutor in college that got paid minimum wage working out of their math lab. Students would come in for help on their homework. This elderly woman taking an entry-level math course would come in often for help and she seemed like a nice enough lady. But she was falling extremely behind on her homework and the semester was almost over. So she asked me if I would do it all for her for a couple hundred bucks. That kinda money back then was huge for me, so I took her up on her offer.
Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 1 month ago
I think the college paying minimum wage were the ones with moral questions to answer.
#16
Was working in a warehouse as an order filler. Was all the way in the back of a freezer when I suddenly became very sick to my stomach. I raced as fast as I could to the nearest bathroom but before I could get all my layers of clothing off it was too late. I was a mess. I went to my supervisor and tried to gently convey what was going on. His words were “just clean up and get back to work”. He said this multiple times as I tried to explain why that wasn’t an option. Was told I would receive points for leaving. I got so pissed off at the situation that I took all my soiled clothing, locked it in my locker with a personal lock and never went back.
To who ever had to clean that mess, I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that. And to my old supervisor, you suck.
Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 1 month ago
Shame you didn't manage to stuff them somewhere in your managers office.
#17
When I was in high school, I dated a boy who was horribly abusive, and ended up cheating on me with my best friend the night before my senior prom. Also found out he had been cheating on me pretty much the whole time via the “meet me” app. I obviously dumped him. A few months later I found out he was already dating another girl, so I created an account on meet me, and proceeded to pretend to be someone else for multiple months, get him to virtually cheat on his girlfriend at the time, and send her all of the evidence using a fake social media account. Sorry girl:/ he would’ve done it anyway:/.
Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 1 month ago
Nothing morally dubious here - you were helping to enlighten his next girlfriend.
#18
I used to work for a network of hospitals on the financial side. Due to some internal screwup, a lot of calls ended up getting forwarded to me that shouldn't have. Things from patients calling to schedule appointments to important legal issues. For months I continually raised the issue of my personal cell phone getting forwarded a lot of important calls. The issue was never resolved.
Anyways a few months after the call forwarding thing started, the company decided to terminate my employment. We had a difference of opinion, I didn't like working 6 days a week and the company thought I should be working 7. However the calls never stopped getting forwarded to my phone.
Due to the unhappy breakup, I started just blocking all the calls getting forwarded to me and I never bothered to respond to a single voicemail or call I received. Additionally I got some pretty important legal calls that if not responded to in a timely matter would cost the company significantly. I never forwarded on or explained anything to anyone and I deleted the voicemails and moved on.
I know eventually stuff probably got figured out, but they had months to figure out their call issues and never did. Hopefully them facing legal blowback got them to fix things.
#19
Mother in law is horrible. She’s also super paranoid about people “getting her information” like her email and phone number. She thinks they can steal her identity super easily with those two things. She pissed me off yesterday so I signed her email up for Trump's website and his newsletter and to get information on Scientology and a few conspiracy sites she panicked when she got the emails, thinking they were trying to “get” her. I just shrugged and said well places can sell your information, nothing to be done but she’s been freaking out and I find it hilarious.
#20
About 15 years ago I remodeled my kitchen. Got all new Samsung appliances. At the time Samsung had a promotion that gave you a free flatscreen TV with new appliances. Filled out the offer and was sent a coupon code and went to the samsung website to get my TV.
Added the TV to the cart, and noticed when I applied the coupon code. It changed the unit price of the TV to $0.00 instead of adding the $300 credit to the order.
Honestly I didn't even really need the first TV, but I had to know did they really screw up that coupon that bad? So edited the cart to add a few more TV's and checked out. The answer was yes they really did implement the coupon that bad.
#21
I worked for a charity with an a*****e manager who was both too immature and too inexperienced to actually run things as they should be. When things didn't go his way he'd get passive aggressive, act like a child and blame everyone else for not reading his mind.
There are many times I could have snapped, like him sending me a voice note complaining about things that aren't my job and got my husband so riled up he wanted to break the guys legs for example.
But what really did it was when I stopped doing work that wasn't my responsibility or under the umbrella of my position and he threw my a*s under the bus because he got torn a new one by his boss because the work wasn't done.
Not only did I write a *very* lengthy email detailing every infraction, blatant disregard for the rules and times he broke the law.
I signed his a*s up for not only Scientology but a JW group. With his personal email because his dumb a*s left it signed into a work computer and the devil in me knew I'd need it some day.
#22
When I was about 11 or 12 my parents let me have a slingshot (I’m pretty sure they gave it to me but it’s been 25 years so maybe not). I used to live by the woods and we had all sorts of animals in the yard. One time I wanted to see what it would really do if it hit one. I took a rock, and I shot it from maybe 7-8 feet away a bird sitting in its nest in a tree. I hit it square in the head. It fell out of the nest and hit the ground dead. Same as the story above, I felt immediate remorse, beyond that, when I looked into the nest there were three eggs. Not knowing what to do, and in fear that my parents would punish me severely, I never told anyone. I went back to the nest each day to check the eggs, they never hatched. I thought the remorse I felt from killing the mother was bad. It wasn’t until I was a little more removed from the event that I started to feel the real shame of not owning up to what I had done and maybe saved the babies somehow.
I still think about it 25 or so years later. Now I value all life, I won’t let my spouse kill spiders, and I always try and speak up for the defenseless. I also own my actions and try to always be accountable for their impacts. It was a tough life lesson but I am proud of the person it made me into.
#23
Third grade in the 80’s the teacher found a playboy centerfold a few of us had been passing around. We all blamed a kid that never saw it. He got paddled 7 times in the hallway outside. Screaming and begging like he was being m*rdered. Half the school could hear. Wherever you are Stephen, I’m sorry.
#24
I installed Windows 11 on someone's computer.
#25
I wrote somebody’s masters thesis for money once. Some poor employer hired that guy who knows very little about anything. I wouldn’t do something like that again, but at that time in my life I felt like I needed the cash.
#26
Had a 6 month affair with a married woman. We all lived in the same house. Their marriage was done, and she found being with me helpful in getting out of it, but still...pretty f*****g questionable and I'd make different choices 10 years on.
Emily 1 month ago
I know of someone where something similar happened. Her partner was a serial cheater and very emotionally abusive and manipulative. She was absolutely miserable and broken. Eventually, she fell into her own affair and because of that person, she was finally able to realize she deserved happiness and health in like and a relationship. Sometimes it takes someone showing us the other side before we find the strength to leave for better. It's not right to cheat, but it can fall into a rather gray area from time to time.
#27
I had a professor in college that I despised. He despised me as well. He was a hateful angry old codger. I was a dumb*ss college kid.
One night my friend and I dressed up in all black (because that’s not suspicious) and snuck up to his vehicle, putting little bbs in each one of his tires’ intake valves and recapping them. The next morning, sure enough, he had four flat tires. Thank goodness this was in 2004 or so. Otherwise, some doorbell camera would have definitely caught our tomfoolery.
#28
My brother owed me $200 that i lent him when i was 16 years old. I busted my a*s helping a friend of my dad's lay tile for half my summer vacation.
As soon as i got paid, my brother hit me up for money.
Fast forward several months, still hadnt been paid back. I snagged $20 from his wallet to buy pizza for my friend and I.
Never saw that $200, never saw back most of the money i lent him, finally learned my lesson last year and went no contact, am 35 now.
StarCrossedFriday 1 month ago
If that’s the most morally questionable thing you’ve ever done I wouldn’t worry too much about the afterlife 😁
#29
This probably isn’t technically the worst I’ve done but I stole some of my stepmother’s son’s stuff after he died from cancer and pawned it so I could get high. I’ve been sober for 5 years now and I still don’t feel too good about that.
Margaret Shannon 1 month ago
That’s sad. But you’re sober now! Perhaps the lingering guilt can help you stay sober? You can clean up your conscience by living a better life, staying healthy and doing good deeds.
#30
I put an old boss's number on public bathroom stalls.
What do you think ?
eric p 1 month ago (edited)
BP please filter the responses for fake or references to movies/tv/etc. There are 3 very obvious ones on here
Wandaluzt 1 month ago
They just copy the content from Reddit or elsewhere. This is an advertising site. They're not interested in the content.
Load More Replies...
LynzCatastrophe 1 month ago
Ok, here's mine and I don't care if it gets me banned because a good chunk of the comments seem to think they hold the moral high ground and lack empathy. I was still in my divorce process when this happened. My ex-husband has had trust issues our entire 20 year marriage, his insecurities would repeatedly convince him that I was cheating on him at various parts in our marriage, though I never did, never even gave him situations to work himself up about it. But because for the simple fact that at points I didn't want sex, it meant I was cheating. The reality was I was massively unattracted to a manchild who wanted to treat me like his mother. So after he last accused me I snapped. And I did. I don't regret it, it was the best night I've had in years. I'm aware this doesn't give me power or make me right, but I'd been unjustly accused multiple times for years just because he couldn't admit his own shortcomings.
LynzCatastrophe 1 month ago
We were pretty much over by the time that last fight occurred anyway. I was still legally married by that night, but we weren't together. Looking back, I'm wondering how much was gaslighting.
Load More Replies...
Serena Myers 1 month ago
My secrets remain my secrets, and I'm not splurging them all over social media. In most cases (98%) they will remain my secret, in 2% the secret is shared with one other, which I can't share with anyone else because it wouldn't be a secret secret., but those who share the secret secret won't tell anyone else either.
eric p 1 month ago (edited)
BP please filter the responses for fake or references to movies/tv/etc. There are 3 very obvious ones on here
Wandaluzt 1 month ago
They just copy the content from Reddit or elsewhere. This is an advertising site. They're not interested in the content.
Load More Replies... LynzCatastrophe 1 month ago
Ok, here's mine and I don't care if it gets me banned because a good chunk of the comments seem to think they hold the moral high ground and lack empathy. I was still in my divorce process when this happened. My ex-husband has had trust issues our entire 20 year marriage, his insecurities would repeatedly convince him that I was cheating on him at various parts in our marriage, though I never did, never even gave him situations to work himself up about it. But because for the simple fact that at points I didn't want sex, it meant I was cheating. The reality was I was massively unattracted to a manchild who wanted to treat me like his mother. So after he last accused me I snapped. And I did. I don't regret it, it was the best night I've had in years. I'm aware this doesn't give me power or make me right, but I'd been unjustly accused multiple times for years just because he couldn't admit his own shortcomings.
LynzCatastrophe 1 month ago
We were pretty much over by the time that last fight occurred anyway. I was still legally married by that night, but we weren't together. Looking back, I'm wondering how much was gaslighting.
Load More Replies... Serena Myers 1 month ago
My secrets remain my secrets, and I'm not splurging them all over social media. In most cases (98%) they will remain my secret, in 2% the secret is shared with one other, which I can't share with anyone else because it wouldn't be a secret secret., but those who share the secret secret won't tell anyone else either.
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