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To find out more about relationship warning signs, we contacted author, researcher, and speaker Dr. Cortney S. Warren. She's a Harvard-trained, California-based board-certified clinical psychologist and Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry at the UNLV School of Medicine, and has noticed that some of the most common red flags are:

Irreconcilable differences. "When two people fundamentally want different things in a relationship and realize it—that there is no compromise on either side—it often signifies that the relationship will end," Warren, who has recently released her new book, Letting Go of Your Ex, told Bored Panda.

"For example, one person wants children and the other doesn’t; one person wants to live in their hometown while the other insists on a different, larger city; or one person wants monogamy while the other wants an open relationship."

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships Man I just wanted to sleep. He wouldn't f*****g let me.

He'd always been controlling, and I put up with it for way too long.

One morning as he was berating me for wanting to sleep after working third shift, I realized that this was going to be my life if I didn't bail: working my a*s off at work, and running the household at home, all while being treated like s**t for wanting/needing help.

Once he realized I was serious, he changed his tune but it was just way too little, way too late.

Sp1d3rb0t , Isabella Fischer Report

Final score:

294points

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Content Wombat 6 months ago

Well done for realising what was going on and getting away. Hope you're doing better now. x

135points

I have an extreme level of loyalty and commitment, sometimes to my own detriment, so I've never reached that moment, despite tonnes of red flags and things I would have loved to walk away from. My ex-fiancé just broke up with me a couple weeks ago after 10 years together, and it came as a massive shock but I'm feeling so much better now. No more 3-day-old curry breath, no more bowls full of mouldy milk left upstairs for a week, no more teenage boy behaviour from a 30-year-old man, no more feeling lonely while he spends every waking minute sitting upstairs away from me, no more awful sex that lacks basic stamina... yeah, I'm done lmao.
Since we broke up I've started taking much better care of myself. Tending to my personal care more efficiently because I'm no longer depressed, eating better (I've lost 7lbs so far), moving/exercising more, my skin condition has just GONE, I'm laughing more, and generally feeling like I've got a fricking future again. I feel awesome.

TLMoore93 Report

Final score:

272points

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Black Cat 6 months ago

You've lost more than 7lb. You've lost a massive burden. Good on you for looking after yourself better. Treat yourself the way you expect others to treat you and if they dont they're no great loss.

129points

The interest/love is gone (for one or both partners). According to Warren, when someone starts to feel indifferent towards their significant other—as if whether they are there or not is sort of irrelevant—it’s a sign that the relationship is going downhill.

Wandering eye for other partners. "Often when a relationship is coming to an end, people start looking at other people as potential mates or sexual partners. It can be a sign that they are trying to see if other potential mates are available," the psychologist added.

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships While I was finishing up engineering school, he said to me “As long as I make more money, I don’t have to contribute as much to cooking and cleaning—my contribution is set”. Considering he was an established engineer for Ford, and we had been dating for 4 years, I realized that I would rather not be his house slave on a journey to catch up.

gloomloon , Kevin McCutcheon Report

Final score:

265points

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Tamra 6 months ago

So basically, if this guy lived alone, he'd presumably be doing his own cooking and cleaning anyway, right? But since he has a partner, he feels fine telling her that it will now mostly be her job. F**k off with that sexist c**p.

141points

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships The last ex was a nice enough guy. We were long distance, 1 state away. So he'd come spend the weekend with me once or twice a month.

The last he visited we had the discovery Channel on and it was some show about dinosaurs. He laughed at one point and said "yeah right the earth is only 4000ys old."

That's when it clicked, his family were born again Christians. The dinosaurs are a devil hoax and earth is 4k years old type. I knew instantly it wouldn't work. I cannot be with a science denier.

SaebraK , Narciso Arellano Report

Final score:

251points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago (edited)

You don't believe the dinosaurs are a hoax? Next you will tell me you are a globe earther, a vaxxer, and you deny that the world's elite are really secret lizard people!

157points

Lack of effort to connect. "A lack of effort to spend time together is a definite red flag. When a person starts to realize that they don’t really want to be around their mate, it becomes clear in their behavior. For example, not making plans, not communicating well, or even avoiding their partner."

Hostility or anger. Warren said that sometimes the end of a relationship is seen in an escalation of negative emotion — being angry and generally dissatisfied with a mate can make people want to leave.

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships The final straw was:

Me: “I need emotional support”

Him “Can’t you get that from your friends?”.

PugWitch , Priscilla Du Preez Report

Final score:

218points

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Tobias Reaper 6 months ago

my best friend had similar with her EX they were having issues but the straw that broke the camels back was when she said to him i deserve to be happy and he laughed in her face that was it for her

76points

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships He asked if I would be his "plan B".

BTW, mad props to Alicia for being the girl he was going to cheat on me with if she'd given him the chance. You are the reason we had the conversation that produced this revelation. I have no idea who you are, I've never seen you, I've never met you. But you saved me. You opened my eyes. Thank you, and thank you even more for snubbing him like the creep that he is lmao.

aesthesia1 , Timur Weber Report

Final score:

201points

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arthbach 6 months ago

"He asked if I would be his Plan B. I looked at him in utter disbelief. Smiling I replied, 'Honey, after that question, you don't even rate being Plan Z!'"

77points

There's no universal solution to getting over a breakup. What works for one person might not for another. So Warren recommends a few specific things if you’re really struggling:

Pause and try not to act impulsively. "If you’re trying to heal ... and feel stuck on your ex—pining over them, focused on what they’re doing, wishing you could talk or understand what happened—you’re probably feeling really bad emotionally," she noted. "This makes you more likely to want to contact your ex. In the long run, this is going to make it harder for you to move on. So, when you want to reach out, pause. Stop acting and notice your feelings without reaching out to your ex."

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships We were on vacation and on our way to get our luggage when they turned to me and said “I'm glad we’re together but damn I bet I'd be just as happy to be with some of the other women around here.”

I didn't reply and I'd be debating whether to break up anyway but that was the final straw. I still remember their face looking around while saying that.

xxSKSxx_ , Markus Winkler Report

Final score:

189points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

How did he think that was an appropriate thing to say?

93points

Puzzled-Mushroom8050 , Priscilla Du Preez Report

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships Found d**k pics on his phone he'd sent to some woman on Twitter, then a dm conversation with a sex worker making an appt to see her. He'd also been having an emotional affair with someone he'd met online while I was going through cancer treatments. I was just done.

Final score:

189points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago (edited)

Absolute dingleberry. How do these people even exist? Have they no sense of shame or guilt or wrongdoing?

98points

Black Cat 6 months ago

Because they go into every relationship with the mindset of what they can get out of it, not what they can contribute. Their partners are nothing more than a resource they can use and dismiss when something better comes along.

19points

Robin DJW 6 months ago

No. They don't. This is the rough definition of an incipient sociopath. Glad you left.

7points

James016 6 months ago

Some people are just plain selfish.

7points

Michael Largey 6 months ago

They assume that other people are as shallow as they are. In fact, they are so shallow that they are incapable of imagining anything else.

4points

Nykky 6 months ago

Money brains didn't evolve.

0points

Anne Roberts 6 months ago

Why on Earth do men think d**k pics are a good idea. What woman really wants to look at that??

13points

unfilteredCigarette73 6 months ago (edited)

In all fairness OP didn't mention if they were asked for pics, like did Twitter woman ask for...anyways if they were unsolicited thats freaking gross nobody wants to see your old balls jack@ss

2points

WonderWoman 6 months ago

Dickpics are never appropriate - never. No one is enamored by pictures of that, NO ONE. Just don't ever take pictures of your naked self.

10points

Elizabeth Sedai 6 months ago

Unless the person asks for them. There are plenty of women and men that do ask and want them: people who are in long distance relationships or just enjoy seeing sexual organs. Yes, even women. I can say that because I'm a woman who does like the male form. Saying that it's "never appreciate- never" and "no one... NO ONE" wants to is wildly inaccurate. The important distinction is between solicited and nonsolicited. Unsolicited dp's are absolutely never appropriate, and are sexual harassment/ abuse. YOU not wanting to see dp's at all is your opinion and that's fine, but you don't get to tell other people their opinions. I mean that in all respect.

1point

Prince Lee 6 months ago

my second husband left me cause i had cancer, he had a friend that killed himself a year before and his reason for "leaving me" is he wanted to leave me before i died on him, he had too many people die on him, I DIDNT DIE I BEAT THE CANCER, and he tried coming back "well your not going to die on me now right" Dumped him even faster and blocked him

8points

Valek Fermiga 6 months ago

It's amazing that you beat it - I really, really mean that.... that sack of shi* husband should hook up with the dog turd from the op, get handcuffed together, thrown into a pit full of rats so they slowly, and very painfully get eaten alive....

4points

Valek Fermiga 6 months ago

That fuc*ing disgusting c**t*!! - bad enough he was cheating on her, but cheating while she was going through cancer treatment?? 🤬🤬🤬🤬 - he SHOULD have been by her side all the way through it - EVERY session - that heartless wan*er should never be allowed to with anyone EVER again - he's pure scum....

6points

Michelle H 6 months ago

Whoa! It's like you picked my exact situation right out of my head. My ex went so far as to use my cancer treatment as part of his hero story. I found slews of messages where he'd tell other woman how saintly he was taking care of his "sick friend with cancer". I was his wife of 13 years. Better off without him.

2points

Valek Fermiga 6 months ago

Anger doesn't even start to cover the emotion I feel for that cun* 😡😡🤬🤬 you are so much better on your own than with the walking talking advert for Durex.... I hope you are recovering well.....

0points

6 months ago

im sorry :(((

1point

Vinga Älvebjörk 6 months ago

I’ll never forget this guy I was se*ting for a year or so got to know him over facebook he said he was unhappy in his marriage etc and well I was young and dumb turns out his wife was really sick with cancer and he was doing this with many many women. And one got so angry she posted all pictures and some videos on his Facebook page which he left open for all. Texts too. I think the entire Italian village he was from knew in a few minutes or less.

0points

Dread Pirate Roberts 6 months ago

What a s**t nugget

0points

El Dee 6 months ago

He has indeed wronged her, he should indeed be dumped immediately if not sooner. But why was she looking at his phone? That's something I have never done to any partner. If you're looking in his phone you already have issues over trust and you don't even NEED to look at the phone if it's like that..

0points

Illifred 6 months ago

Good for you to get rid of him. He's a d***head, obviously. But personally, I'm not a fan of touching my SO's phone.

0points

Focus on yourself. Although it may seem like going through a breakup is a purely negative experience, it is the perfect time to understand yourself more deeply. "When it comes to relationships, this means focusing on how we contributed to the relationship starting, existing, and ending. Exploring what you want next and taking steps to heal yourself is your top priority now."

Take space from your ex. The psychologist highlighted that setting healthy boundaries around your ex is key to moving on. "It’s often very helpful for people not to have any contact with their ex for a while after a breakup, as well as stopping yourself from getting information about what they’re doing now through mutual friends or on social media (for example, who they’re dating now, what they’re doing, etc)," Warren added.

#10

I was on the fence about our future already but then as we were leaving a restaurant he went on about how the waitress was so disrespectful and rude to him and because of that he was seething mad and didn't want me to talk to him for a bit. I was baffled bc the waitress wasn't rude. Then after a bit it hit me. I paid so the waitress was talking to me and not him and apparently he felt ignored. But his reaction was sooooo disproportionate to the situation and I felt really uncomfortable with how he spoke about her so that was my moment.

skygirl555 Report

Final score:

182points

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Black Cat 6 months ago

His ego was hurt because he wasn't the centre of attention.

88points

coastalliving40 , Piron Guillaume Report

#11

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships When I found out my mom had lung cancer and she didn’t want me to fly home for the surgery because my business was too young and she didn’t want me gone for two weeks.

I flew home anyway. Mom is doing great now and the business is flourishing.

Final score:

179points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

Family first.

46points

Stop having sex with your ex—and maybe even other partners. Warren said that sex is a very complicated topic when it comes to breakups. If you are in love with someone, it's generally connected to some emotion and the expression of love for another person but, for many people, sex has nothing to do with love—it's tied to getting an orgasm, feeling powerful, or being desired. So "if you’re trying to move on from your ex, sleeping with them, touching them, being sexual with them will make it harder to let go. And, even having sex with a new partner can be very triggering if you’re struggling to move on because it may be a psychological reminder of your breakup as well as a neurobiological high that re-activates your connection to your ex."

Increase your self-care. It may seem simple, but focusing on getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, exercising, and taking good care of your physical health is key during these difficult times.

#12

She broke up with me, then as I brought her stuff to her, she said I'm mad for thinking she meant it.

So I ended it.

Freodrick Report

Final score:

173points

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James016 6 months ago

Playing games like that is an instant no contact.

123points

#13

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships For example, the last boyfriend i had would neglect me, never do anything for me, blow me off for other people, and sometimes even insult me. but if im honest the thing that really turned it around for me was that he left a dove chocolate wrapper on my floor (when he came to visit me for the first time in weeks). idk why that was the turning point for me. i just had a vision of cleaning up his messes for the rest of time and even though i didn’t break up with him then it definitely set me on that path lmao. that little blue wrapper sitting on my nice clean carpet…i just can’t.

thinkinginkling , anonymous Report

Final score:

171points

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Michael P (Perthaussieguy) 6 months ago

Anybody else noticing in the pic, it would be cheaper to buy the two smaller packs weight/price?

146points

Increase your social support. This is a time when reaching out to trusted friends and family can play a huge role in recovery. Warren added that joining a support group like Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous or Codependents Anonymous can also prove to be very helpful.

Be careful with your behavior. "Don't act in ways that ultimately harm you more—like drinking a lot, using drugs to distract yourself, or acting in spiteful/angry ways towards your ex. Strive to act in ways that help you and don’t hurt you over time," the psychologist said.

"If you’re going through a tough breakup, remember that you’re not alone. Almost all of us will go through a very difficult one at some point in our lives," she noted. There are many therapeutic skills that you can learn to help you let go of your ex and create the next great phase of your life, many of which are described in detail with activities for people to practice in my new book, Letting Go of Your Ex."

#14

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships He wouldn’t dance with me.

Obviously there were other issues going on, but when he wouldn’t dance with me at a party put on by his friends…it was a silly fun party, with a silly theme, and 70s music, my FAVORITE. He wouldn’t agree to even try to dance to even one song. Just stood or sat by a wall, on his phone from time to time. I just knew I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life dancing alone because my partner wouldn’t dance with me.

canarialdisease , Ardian Lumi Report

Final score:

170points

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Brenda 6 months ago

My late husband wasn't a dancer in any sense of the word, but he did like to hold me & slowly go in circles. Knowing how hurt I was when my first husband refused to even slow dance with me at our reception (he loudly refused in front of our guests), so he got my mom to teach him some basic moves (she was a dancer). It wasn't anything special to watch, but knowing he did it just for me? Damn, I miss him. It's only been 5 months, but that kind of memory keeps me going.

235points

Sweet_Dish_8098 , RDNE Stock project Report

#15

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships He didn’t like that I was my own person with my own thoughts, feelings, likes and dislikes. He tried to made me into a copy of himself. In the end I dreaded going to his place. Then I knew it was time for us to go seperate ways.

Final score:

161points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

18points

#16

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships Multiple cheating that I tried to deal with. Should have left the first time. Then one night when we were going to bed he was on the furthest side of the bed almost up in the corner - a grown man as far away as he could be on a queen mattress so he wouldn’t be near me. He said he wasn’t happy and wasn’t attracted to me. I said this is enough and went the next day and got the divorce papers. It’s been 10 years and I’m still single.

cbunt1984 , Budgeron Bach Report

Final score:

156points

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HOUSE 6 months ago

Good for you

58points

safety_pin_era , Aleksandar Pasaric Report

#17

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships The breaking point for me was when he has a literal hissy fit like a child in a convenience store because he thought the cashier was favoring the rich townies before him because he looked poor. He threw his bag of chips on the counter and stormed out of the store. I apologized to the clerk and ran after him. I had to talk to him like his mother and tell him that Im not dealing with this kind of behavior and he will go back into the store to buy his stupid snacks because I don’t want to hear about it for the rest of the day. I was literally so embarrassed to be around him after that.

Final score:

154points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

Manchild.

75points

ShortCandidate4866 , Monstera Production Report

#18

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships I was throwing up and he ignored me while watching sports in his phone.

Final score:

152points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

55points

#19

When I found out he hacked my email. Did you know that through your gmail account you can access literally everything? Like Google maps history and Google history? I didn’t until that day.

I had absolutely nothing to hide. But found out he had been literally stalking my every move and location for months. I felt so completely violated.

leamerlena Report

Final score:

152points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

I am running out of insults on this thread.

185points

#20

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships She voted for brexit.

Smemz88 , Chris Lawton Report

Final score:

149points

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James016 6 months ago

You are well rid.

86points

#21

He cheated on me with his ex and then told his mom that I kicked him out and made him sleep on the street because he “made a mistake.” I didn’t. I chose to leave and stay with a friend. I woke up the next morning to 100 messages from her telling me what a piece of s**t I am for making her baby boy sleep outside over a mistake.
He also stole my Xanax and then blamed me for leaving my lockbox open. I also didn’t do that, but the fact that I had to keep them locked up in the first place was lost on him. Was single for years after that.

babythrottlepop Report

Final score:

144points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

42points

#22

He basically told me there was no point in me pursuing a career because all women should be stay at home moms, and that's what he wants for his children. We were both 19, had only been dating like 2 months, and hadn't even kissed yet. I've also never had any interest in having or raising kids, which I had already told him, but I guess he didn't find my opinion on the matter to be important.

Ewace246 Report

Final score:

143points

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James016 6 months ago

Point him in the direction of the 1950's

117points

#23

Went out for a night to myself for once. My ex husband said that if I didn’t come home (I’d only been out an hour at that point) that he would go to every bar in the area to hunt me down and “bring me home”.

DoorEmotional Report

Final score:

134points

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Strings 6 months ago

We had a couple occasions like this when I was bouncing. All the woman had to do was inform me, and show me a pic of their partner: partner had a sudden ban, and the lady would have an escort to their car at the end of the night (and advice to call the police)

164points

#24

I was very happily in love, and was confident we could work through anything until he said, “sometimes I wish you were skinnier.” That broke me as I am very self conscious about my weight.

trader_joes_wine Report

Final score:

131points

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Rachel Ratty 6 months ago

what an absolute tool!

69points

#25

We went to a concert and in that moment I realized something was wrong. I shouldn’t be here with him. I loved the band, but wasn’t excited because of who I was there with. It made me realize that something wasn’t right. I know this sounds weird, but it opened my eyes. I slowly began to realize that nothing in our relationship excited me or made me happy anymore.

FromUNautrePlanet Report

Final score:

131points

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Content Wombat 6 months ago

Sometimes all it takes is a change of perspective.

51points

#26

I wasn’t a priority.

BasuraIncognito Report

Final score:

130points

POST

Lyoness 6 months ago

This should be so much higher.

44points

#27

The whole relationship was f****d up but this was the catalyst to end it.

I was two hours away in the city for a week for work, and I was busy from 5:30am until 9pm every day so I couldn’t constantly be messaging her. So she pretended to OD on pain pills so she could be sent to the big hospital in that particular city. I still remember receiving the “okay, you can visit me now 🙂” message. Like what the f**k. I’m away for a WEEK. Seven days! And I can’t leave work because I had no transport (we all rode to the complex in a van).

Unfortunately for her she was sent to a psych ward and I was able to tell the doctors that she was harassing me so she had her phone taken off her. So she borrowed another patient’s phone and started messaging me on that. After that I told the doctors the whole story and asked to be removed as her emergency contact. She managed to convince a receptionist that she needed to contact me and called me again from a hospital phone. I had to inform the doctors AGAIN and she must have had all phone privileges revoked after that.

When I was home and found out she’d been released I messaged her saying it was over. So she rode her moped an HOUR in the dark to come to my house and lied saying a friend had dropped her off and she had no way home so she had to stay (I live in the middle of nowhere). Then she assaulted me physically when I tried to leave the room to get my phone. I managed to throw her on the ground and went and called the cops. When she realised they were on the way she tried to take pills again so after they arrested her she didn’t even spend the night in the cells, she was sent to the hospital and monitored instead.

That was pretty much the last contact I had with her bar a few stalker moments and her constant messaging online. I arranged with her friend to drop all her s**t off in a public parking lot during the day and I never replied to her ever again. She had my phone number memorised and would text and call all the time, so I changed my number. I blocked every new account of hers that popped up. I remember that in one of her profile pics she had cut and dyed her hair to the exact same style as mine. She also sent me a request on a dating app with a picture of a celebrity who has the same first name as me, and the name of the dating profile was my cat’s name (he’s named after a Pokémon). It also had her star sign. By that stage I had a Protection Order against her and when I showed an officer the screenshot of the profile she was like “is this girl an idiot?” They must have warned her she was close to being arrested again because she stopped contacting me after that. But it took literal YEARS to get to that point.

The great takeaway from the whole thing is that she always dreamed of moving to Australia to work, but with a DV record she won’t even be allowed to enter the country to visit, let alone work.

MarsupialNo1220 Report

Final score:

126points

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Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

I am not excusing her behaviour here, just noting she must have had a lot of mental health issues.

95points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

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Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#28

I used to tuck in my shirts all the time when I was younger cause I like it when my clothes are tight it makes me feel safe.

We were chilling out on his trampoline and he just turns to me and goes “why do you always tuck your shirts in?” And without letting me answer he pinned me down, pulled all the layers I had on up, grabbed my breasts and layed on top of me so I couldn’t move.

I was 16.

No-Opening-2817 Report

Final score:

117points

POST

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

158points

ChamomileBrownies , cottonbro studio Report

#29

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships Not my last relationship, but my first serious relationship.

It was our one year anniversary. He brought his dad.

Final score:

117points

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Black Cat 6 months ago

What? Should have started flirting with his dad. Well you brought him.

29points

#30

We were long distance. He slept over, and was leaving the next day. I get home. Bed is unmade. Tags from the new shirt he left on the floor.

I don't think he was expecting me to have standards for men. He was used to doing the least he could do to get by. I also don't think he expected it to be over like that.

indicatprincess Report

Final score:

115points

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Black Cat 6 months ago

Glad you decided to ditch him than be his substitute mummy picking up after him.

53points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#31

He was abusive in every single way. Together 11 years….. the day he cheated on me I left. In my mind at the time, it was the only way I could get out without him blaming me…. He still did! I regret every day, not leaving him sooner!

Consistent-Bend-8039 Report

Final score:

112points

POST

Black Cat 6 months ago

At least you left him, that's the main thing.

58points

bordermelancollie09 Report

#32

I was pregnant and he was really not wanting to work. He finally got a job and worked for three hours before coming home and telling me the job really wasn't "for him." I knew he was never gonna help support the baby or myself and I wouldn't be able to take any time off work after having the kid. Left him like two weeks later at 9 weeks pregnant

Edit: he also didn't help around the house at all, didn't cook or clean. Literally just played video games all day long.

Final score:

109points

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Black Cat 6 months ago

I'm guessing you didn't mean to get pregnant because why would anyone want someone so useless to be a father.

85points

#33

Relationship was on the rocks for about a year, had multiple fights and I considered seriously ending it three times before our final fight. He always wanted me under his thumb at all times so when he told me to leave, which he never allowed me to do during a fight, I took my cat and told him I’m done.

aspendaydream Report

Final score:

106points

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EmAdoresHerKats🇮🇪🇵🇸🇩🇿 6 months ago

You and cat will be much happier

67points

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

See Also on Bored Panda

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#34

A close family member had just died and he was complaining because he wanted sex. Apparently I was supposed to reward him because he offered to (insisted on) driving me to the funeral??

MoodyBlu_2729 Report

Final score:

98points

POST

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

He wants rewards for doing the basics? What rewards did you get?

48points

atomicallyseparated Report

#35

I was unable to have a calm and mature conversation about our relationship, expectations, and future. I was shamed for my general curiosity about various subjects (they disliked that I have many interests and hobbies). Just felt uncomfortable and exhausted by their presence and behavior. My feelings for them naturally diminished, and I gave up.

Final score:

95points

POST

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

If they are not trying, why should you?

39points

#36

I had a panic attack and fainted (in a car in a mostly-empty parking lot) and he told me I was embarrassing him.

xylitolbaby Report

Final score:

91points

POST

Kariali 6 months ago

Oh yeah, those guys who make everything being about them. Avoid them like the plague!

50points

#37

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships He insisted on sleeping with a blanket that had a giant photo of Taylor Swift on it and would make me watch her concert documentaries almost every time we hung out.

There were also multiple women messaging me on social media telling me he was a creep and harassed them which was a major red flag for me.

vinylsleepover , callicocallie Report

Final score:

85points

POST

CrunChewy McSandybutt 6 months ago

It's interesting that the Taylor Swift blanket was the main point and the creeping on other women the side item.

137points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

See Also on Bored Panda

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#38

Not my last relationship, but the one before. He neglected me and always made it sound as if my expectations from him were unrealistic, or it would just be my fault I wasn't receiving attention. He also didn't respect me in bed. So the last straw was when I tried to start a fun conversation about foreplay. In short, he got extremely angry, saying he's always been trying to please me, and I should know what he wants without asking him. This time instead of crying myself to sleep, I slept soundly, knowing the guy was definitely addicted to p**n.

buntywoo Report

Final score:

85points

POST

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

What a useless wankstain.

65points

#39

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships We did shrooms and i was like holy s**t i actually hate this guy.

Mia2354 , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

79points

POST

Alexandra 6 months ago

Quite apart from whether you would or wouldn't have come to this conclusion without the shrooms, I don't think an impaired brain should be a basis for life-altering decisions.

23points

#40

“Yup, I’m Breaking Up With You”: 40 Moments That Ruined Relationships After telling him that he needed to put in time and effort after we went long distance, he came back with..."I'll dedicate time to us when I move back, but not now".

Ms_Evey , Dương Nhân Report

Final score:

79points

POST

Black Cat 6 months ago

So you're only important to him sexually?

31points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#41

There were already a lot of things about him that bothered me, but I closed my eyes for it. He was very sweet, but I couldn’t level emotionally and he was socially awkward around my friends and family. We spent some days together at my student house and despite being together all the time, I felt so alone. I just wanted to go home to my family really bad. So when I finally went home, I talked with my mom about the situation and for the first time I was completely honest. That was such an eye opener, but I instantly knew there’s nothing my ex could do to fix it. The break up was very hurtful, I had to explain over and over again, and I felt so extremely guilty I sometimes didn’t even know how to live with myself. But I couldn’t have proceeded in the relationship, that would have hurt the both of us even more.

Medstudentgirl2002 Report

Final score:

32points

POST

Penny Fan 6 months ago

I had to do this once. It's heartbreaking for all concerned but sometimes you have to be honest.

7points

#42

I felt more like her mother than her partner so I ended it.

snokiebabbs Report

Final score:

30points

POST

weatherwitch 6 months ago

Damn right thing to do 😊

3points

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

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Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#43

This guy never said a mean word to me and was so so so funny, but there wasn’t a lot of sexual passion and he was unhygienic. He was also my HS sweetheart of 6 years.

I tried to seduce him one night and he made a joke and blew his nose. I just blurted it out that I wanted to break up. It was really hard to get over him and I still have love and respect for him, but it was the right call for us.

_scrambled_egg_ Report

Final score:

29points

POST

EmAdoresHerKats🇮🇪🇵🇸🇩🇿 6 months ago

Bad hygiene is a huge deal breaker

25points

#44

I was upstairs laughing with friends online. Instead of asking what was so funny, my ex, downstairs on the couch, turned up the TV so loud so he didn’t have to hear me.

Obviously there’s a lot more than that, but it was that defining moment that flipped the switch.

babytomato Report

Final score:

28points

POST

That One 6 months ago

And here I am lowering the sound of my player to make sure my neighbours are not disturbed. =/

5points

#45

One normal conversation turned into an argument in public, I couldn't take it anymore so I said I'm going home. So he persuaded me to stay, took me near a cigarette shop and blew smoke right to my face and said "You still want to go ??? Can't you see I need you ??" ( He was trying to reduce his smoking, drinking and d***s habit, had promised me he won't touch them until it's absolutely necessary ).

Later he followed me to the the metro station and all while pleading loud enough for others to turn around and look.

That day I went home and cried feeling guilty and humiliated.

Honestly speaking I did give him an another chance after this incidents but a few months later, this memory was the strongest reason I left him.

Bleak_star_dust Report

Final score:

28points

POST

Alexandra 6 months ago

When will women stop taking responsibility for the men in their lives??

25points

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

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College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#46

Instead of letting me enjoy a video game I’m playing for the first time, he kept telling me what to do.

duffypink Report

Final score:

27points

POST

Nathaniel He/Him Cis-Het 6 months ago

Crouch, crouch! Button B! Now shoot! Go over there and do that mission!

13points

sophiaspacetraveler Report

#47

After he farted while I was eating. After a day of hitting on other women, too! This topped off the day before, we were going at it…I was going down on him and he f*****g farted…in my face. Don’t believe I wasn’t doen then. Ya, 2nd time & everything else, I was DONE.

Final score:

23points

POST

Crystal Spencer 6 months ago

Eewwwee! Wtf?! Yeah. You did the right thing!

13points

#48

I spent a week asking him over and over again what he wanted for dinner for a romantic dinner that I was preparing (he has a very exquisite palate and likes only basic food) for Saturday night, and he didn't tell me until Saturday afternoon and only because I insisted and got angry. That day he went to eat with his friends and he ate a lot until he burst, so when he arrived at night he wasn't hungry. It turns out that when he told me what he wanted for dinner, I already knew that he wouldn't be hungry at night but he didn't think of me, and he admitted it.

yeinwei Report

Final score:

22points

POST

René Sauer 6 months ago

exquisite palate sounds to me more like truffles and wagyu beef, not whatever is considered basic food.

37points

Numerous_Business895 Report

#49

Me talking about my disturbing hallucinations and him being dismissive and neglecting my feelings. Somewhere in my messed up brain, I thought ”why, aren’t you a rude piece of s**t?”.

Final score:

20points

POST

Antonia 6 months ago

Are you sure he didn't give you something that cáused the hallucinations?

7points

Vegetable_Lie_1194 Report

#50

I realized i could have the exact same relationship with someone else and be happy. i didn’t need him.

Final score:

16points

POST

ElfVibratorGlitter 6 months ago

I think she/he/they was saying that she/he/they could have a similar relationship with someone else and actually be happy versus the relationship currently in. Maybe? Maybe not?

3points

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Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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I'm the Visual Editor at Bored Panda, responsible for ensuring that everything our audience sees is top-notch and well-researched. What I love most about my job? Discovering new things about the world and immersing myself in exceptional photography and art.

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What do you think ?

POST

MeowMix 6 months ago

My ex's dad passed away unexpectedly and I gave him all the love and support I knew how to try and get him through it. Then a couple weeks later my brother passed away (he had cancer, so not unexpected, but I was still devastated) and when I told my ex he said "oh, I'm sorry" and walked away. Never said a word about his death ever again. I knew at that moment he really didn't love me at all and I started making plans to leave. Luckily I'm now married to the sweetest, most loving man in the world.

26points

Kare Deter 6 months ago

Upvote for the upgrade!!!

7points

Doctor Strange 6 months ago

When she told me, explicitly, how much better than me the guy she was cheating on me with. Found out from two different sources two weeks later, she was engaged to be married. To a third guy. That was my first relationship, and the second worst I ever had.

21points

ConstantlyJon 6 months ago

wait wait wait, 2nd worst? What the f**k?

3points

Mad McQueen 6 months ago

It's over for me. I asked him twice to get his drinking under control. And he just sneaks around acting like I don't see it. I do. But I'm done bothering him. He wants to self destruct that's on him. It's mostly he gets home before me an drinks then jumps in the shower to "sober" up when I get in. But I can tell by how he talks and acts. Or doesn't have time to cook dinner an throws some s**t together that is disgusting to make it look like he spent time on it. Friday. Saturday. Sunday. Drinking. Not Monday as I'm off an he can't sneak it. Then either Tuesday and Wednesday sneaking drinks or and combo of days I work later than him.

16points

Jan Bowyer 6 months ago

I speak from experience when I say getting away from an alcoholic who doesn't have a desire to be helped is the only way to deal, unless you want your life to be ruined.

14points

jasper 6 months ago

Ex said he was gaming w/a friend and would be home the next day. He did this from time to time, didn't think much of it until he didn't answer his phone and I was having a minor emergency, so I called his friend. He went really quiet and said ex had not been there - and then told me to talk to ex because, while he didn't want to get involved, there was something else going on. I immediately knew what and with whom. I confronted her, and she lied about it. Her friend who had been in the same room, called me later and said the girl lied about it, that she had seen them together. I immediately packed up his stuff and dropped it on her front porch. Ex came home after work and told me he didn't want to break up. I said, what, you want to date us both until you decide who you like best? (Mind you, we had been together 2 years and had casually talked about getting married.) He told me yes, I told him to get out. That was that. I heard they got each other fired from their workplace.

9points

Jan Bowyer 6 months ago

Difficult but brave move.

5points

Veronica Jean 6 months ago

Long distance. He would say he was serious, promise to visit, and party the money away. Blew me off multiple times. Insisted I needed to move in with him (would have to quit my job, never see my family again, put my pets up for adoption) instead of the other way around (He would get a lot of money from selling his property. Just property, no house on it. Also, he grew up in my neighborhood so him moving in with me would bring him closer to everybody he knew). I finally agreed and two days later, he guilt ridden confesses the SCORES of women/men he's been cheating with in multiple states. I didn't say a word except to ask why. He has had a fantasy about sleeping with me since he was a teen and knew I was waiting. He thought he could wear me down and then disappear. It was beyond over. Oh man I could tell stories about his abuse for hours....

7points

James Latimer 6 months ago

I started dating someone and things were going well at first. After a little bit I started noticing how we never got together on the weeks I had my daughter. I asked her about this and she got defensive, so I dropped it. Fast forward a bit and the three of us went to an event at a local arena. My daughter and I got the silent treatment most of the day and when I asked questions, I got one word answers. When I brought her home all she said was "thanks for the ride". Driving home I was resolved to end it. When I got home she asked what was going on. In the ensuing discussion, I told her I wanted to take a break (not break up). She then lashed out, saying I wasn't a real man and that I was hiding behind my daughter. When I then made it clear that this was no longer a break, but a break up, she then told me that she was going to start drinking again because of me. I got the hell away from her as fast as possible.

6points

Angela C 6 months ago

Good, she would have tried to push your daughter out of your life if you'd stayed together

3points

Violet Radar 6 months ago

My last ex told me if I didn't like being called a b***h, we had no business being together. A couple days later he said "I can't believe you think this is worth breaking up over".

5points

censorshipsucks 6 months ago

verbal abuse is definitely a reason to break up.

2points

Apatheist Account2 6 months ago

I never thought of myself as much of a catch...then I read things like this, and I feel so much better about myself.

5points

censorshipsucks 6 months ago

better single and safe and free than trapped with a psycho like me.

1point

Nykky 6 months ago

For me was when I was on the phone with him at one point, and he was loud enough that I had my phone away from my ear. When I saw the face of the guy in the room with me at that time, my friend's ex who was acting like a manchild to her, and how he looked...almost terrified, I was like "yep. This is it." He didn't start that way. It was gradual. But all of the obsessive need to talk to me, contacting my friends at work when I didn't respond within a minute to his texts, saying he didn't need a psychologist because I was going into psychology, and always telling me his biggest fear was that I'd leave him for some bid d**k, it was just like...I hated it by the end. And lo and behold, I thought on it for a little bit to find out I'm aroace! I left him for literally nothing and couldn't be happier!

3points

The Doom Song 6 months ago

My ex cheated on me. I knew exactly when it happened coz they came hone and I found them sitting in the hallway crying at 3am. I simply asked "is there someone else?" And got no answer just more crying. I knew at that point it was over

3points

ConstantlyJon 6 months ago

first girlfriend in college cheated on me while I was out of town... at my grandpa's funeral... with a guy we'd talked about me being concerned about. A few years later, she cheated on him too.

3points

Doctor Strange 6 months ago

People always forget, if they cheated on someone with you, they'll cheat on you. My second worst relationship, she cheated on me with a guy (she explicitly told me how much better he was than me). Then I found out she was engaged to be married. To a different guy. Big surprise, the engagement didn't last because the guy found out she was cheating on him. With a fourth guy.

3points

Anxiousguest 6 months ago

I had 7 of these experiences with my husband

3points

Chewie Baron 6 months ago

A fair amount of these people need to accidentally lose their heads whilst using the remote control to change the channel.

3points

Frogspawn 6 months ago

New Final Destination plot.

0points

Hphizzle 6 months ago

It was a friendship. The breaking moment was a simple question from them. I live in Japan, my friend lives in another country. I was getting ready to go through a gas station car wash. They asked “They have car washes in Japan??” It was that moment that confirmed my suspicion that they no idea about my life here. Anytime I would talk about my day to day life here, they would change the subject back to them and their family. It was that final question that made me stop trying to be a part of their lives.

2points

Neopet22 6 months ago

Not as bad as most of those but with my first bf,he was a great guy we were dating for a very short time and we met on a dating app. For context,I am plus sized (was much slimmer back then though) and my profile didn't have body pics but had body type mentioned. We dated for a bit and all was well.until I started noticing he isn't initiating physical contact as much. Found out he wasnt attracted to my body and ended it. He was really invested in our relationship but I couldn't see myself being with someone who doesn't find me attractive as it would made me feel worthless and insecure. Still single lol

1point

Pa Pa Panda 6 months ago (edited)

My now Ex and I had been having marriage problems for a while even went to a marriage counseling. She was always jealous and thought I was cheating (I wasn't) one night she was acting stranger than usual so I confronted her and she responded "you don't want to have this conversation cause we'll be divorcing after it". Well I'm a "rip off the bandage kind of person" so it was "game on'. She claimed she tested positive for HIV and started crying and carried on all night till the morning sun. Finally I just looked her dead pan in the face and called her bluff. The only thing positive about this episode was we had a counseling session that afternoon, when I relayed that story to the therapist his jaw dropped and asked her "What the hell". Her response was "I had to find out if he was cheating". She didn't want to go back to counseling again and I filed for divorce soon after. Good riddance! BTW I found out later SHE was the one cheating!

1point

Skeeter 6 months ago

I told my ex-husband that I wanted for us to be closer and talk more, like we used to. He stood up and walked out of the house and was gone for a few hours, on foot. When he got back he just acted like nothing was said. Beginning of the end.

0points

day light 6 months ago

he won't stop blaming himself for any little mistake he makes, especially when I'm involved, which means I'm not allowed to just move on from things. I'm still with him, but I can't see a future with him anymore because of this and I want to break up. I'm just... not able to because then he'll use me to blame himself even more... forever.

0points

Rebecka Woods 6 months ago

If this is a long term relationship seek counseling, both individually and apart. Tell him you need for the two of you to both be in individual therapy and to be in couples counseling. Make it about you and that the way he can support you through your needs is to go to therapy. If this is a short term relationship, it's okay to cut things off quickly. When you break up with him do it in a way where you blame date, let him know he's worthwhile and that there is a right partner out there for him but that unfortunately the two of you aren't a good match. Then call the police and tell them the situation so that they do a wellness check. Maybe tell some of his family and friends. Then move on. Let his friends, family, and the public eye take care of him. Don't take responsibility for things you can't control.

0points

Dorothy Cleary 6 months ago

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-2points

Dorothy Cleary 6 months ago

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faith wei 6 months ago

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POST

MeowMix 6 months ago

26points

Kare Deter 6 months ago

Upvote for the upgrade!!!

7points

Doctor Strange 6 months ago

21points

ConstantlyJon 6 months ago

wait wait wait, 2nd worst? What the f**k?

3points

Mad McQueen 6 months ago

16points

Jan Bowyer 6 months ago

I speak from experience when I say getting away from an alcoholic who doesn't have a desire to be helped is the only way to deal, unless you want your life to be ruined.

14points

jasper 6 months ago

9points

Jan Bowyer 6 months ago

Difficult but brave move.

5points

Veronica Jean 6 months ago

7points

James Latimer 6 months ago

6points

Angela C 6 months ago

Good, she would have tried to push your daughter out of your life if you'd stayed together

3points

Violet Radar 6 months ago

My last ex told me if I didn't like being called a b***h, we had no business being together. A couple days later he said "I can't believe you think this is worth breaking up over".

5points

censorshipsucks 6 months ago

verbal abuse is definitely a reason to break up.

2points

Apatheist Account2 6 months ago

I never thought of myself as much of a catch...then I read things like this, and I feel so much better about myself.

5points

censorshipsucks 6 months ago

better single and safe and free than trapped with a psycho like me.

1point

Nykky 6 months ago

3points

The Doom Song 6 months ago

3points

ConstantlyJon 6 months ago

first girlfriend in college cheated on me while I was out of town... at my grandpa's funeral... with a guy we'd talked about me being concerned about. A few years later, she cheated on him too.

3points

Doctor Strange 6 months ago

3points

Anxiousguest 6 months ago

I had 7 of these experiences with my husband

3points

Chewie Baron 6 months ago

A fair amount of these people need to accidentally lose their heads whilst using the remote control to change the channel.

3points

Frogspawn 6 months ago

New Final Destination plot.

0points

Hphizzle 6 months ago

2points

Neopet22 6 months ago

1point

Pa Pa Panda 6 months ago (edited)

1point

Skeeter 6 months ago

0points

day light 6 months ago

0points

Rebecka Woods 6 months ago

0points