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My mom has had three jobs in her entire life – and her last one, before retiring, lasted almost a quarter of a century. She’s happily retired now, and I really never tire of praising the heavens that I’ve never had to help her in job hunting. It’s a very difficult and thankless task nowadays…
Want more proof? Voila – here’s a story from the user u/Mooosejoose, whose mom recently entered the job market for the first time in 30 years – only to find that it had changed a hell of a lot. And not for the better.
More info: Reddit
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The author has a 63-year-old mom who recently quit from her job of 30 years
Image credits: Marcus Aurelius / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The lady claimed the reason for quitting was stress, but the child is pretty sure it was mainly her whim
Image credits: Mooosejoose
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Be that as it may, the author volunteered to help mom in her job hunting – and regretted it soon after
Image credits: Mooosejoose
Image credits: Karolina Kaboompics / Pexels (not the actual photo)
It turned out that the labor market had changed drastically since the mid-’90s – and it’s not easy to find a job when you’re over 60
Image credits: Mooosejoose
The lady also poured her anger on the child – so they started to consider withdrawing their help
It’s all actually very simple – the Original Poster (OP) has a 63-year-old mom who had been working in an office for 30 years, and this was her first job. Her first – and currently her last, because the lady recently quit.
According to her own words, because of stress. According to the author, because of her own whim. The woman had savings that she was planning to use while looking for a new job – but it turned out that the labor market is not the same as it was in the mid-’90s…
The author volunteered to help her with the job hunting – and bitterly regretted it after just a few weeks. It turned out that, firstly, their mom was not technically advanced enough to fill out and send out her resume. Secondly, she had certain requirements for the job, and she even considered some jobs ‘being beneath her.’
Thirdly, the lady was constantly calling all potential employers, which is not the best solution today. And when she got rejected – it turned out that she had no idea how to handle rejection properly. It all ended in several scandals with managers – and the lady, of course, took out all the accumulated indignation on her child.
Is it any wonder that the OP’s mom still hasn’t found a job? Her savings are also running out (after all, prices today are not the same as a couple of decades ago!), and the prospect of being left without a livelihood has arisen before her in all its frightening fullness.
No, the author is not asking for any advice, they took it online just to vent about it. And, perhaps, they would also like to remind everyone who has working parents – you shouldn’t support them in the idea of quitting their current job. Especially if they have some of the traits inherent in this lady.
Image credits: energepic.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Well, we don’t actually know for sure what were the reasons for the author’s mother quitting her previous job, but it was definitely a rash move on her part. At least, modern research clearly confirms that today, it is very difficult for older job seekers to succeed in the market.
And it’s not even about ageism on the part of HRs – it’s just that when you have been working for three whole decades in one place, then the search for a job becomes a real quest for you. And not the most pleasant quest, you must admit.
“This group is of special interest because of three inevitable consequences of aging that differentiate them from younger individuals: (1) enhanced knowledge and skills accumulated over a career, (2) declines in cognitive and physical capabilities among some workers, and (3) a shorter time horizon for career-related decisions,” says Steven G. Allen from NC State University, in his dedicated study.
The pandemic has also made significant adjustments to the state of the labor market. “’Older women’ – namely, those aged 55 and older – stand out for having experienced larger drops in employment during the height of the pandemic, as compared with younger women or men of any age,” The Center for American Progress official website claims. And it’s hard to disagree with that, really.
As for the commenters on the original post, they are absolutely sure that the OP’s mother made a big mistake here. “Trying to find a job after 50 is brutal! (Study after study shows this.) It is ageism but it is strong in the workplace,” one of the people in the comments wrote.
And besides, the responders call on the author to stop this help in finding a job altogether – especially since the mom doesn’t show any gratitude. “She has shown herself unwilling and undeserving of continued assistance. Why are you continuing to engage with her abusive behavior?” another commenter added. And what do you, our readers, also think about this?
People in the comments agreed that the labor market is too harsh for jobseekers over 60 nowadays – and that the author’s mom actually made a mistake by quitting
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What do you think ?
Lyone Fein 2 months ago
Firstly, 63 is not elderly. Secondly, the job market has *always* been prejudiced against older women, for at least the past 100 years. Just like in the movies, older men are seen as dignified and experienced leadership material. Whereas older women are unfairly seen as needy and beyond their prime. Regarding this particular person, IDK why she would have so much difficulty with online applications. I am 61 woman, and I do temping sometimes. These things are not that hard, especially if you are familiar with computers. Maybe there are other issues going on?
UpupaEpops 2 months ago
My mother is 65. We've had various computers, laptops and tablets since 96. To this day she needs help with basic things like transferring a file to an external drive. She simply refuses to learn new things and expects other people to do it for her because it's frustrating for her. There's nothing wrong with her memory, she just shuts down at the mere mention of technology. Meanwhile, my 85-year-old grandmother is ordering groceries online all by herself. My best guess is that OP's mum has realised that she messed up and can't cope with the consequences of her own choices. So right now even basics would appear too difficult for her to manage, because she's in full panic mode.
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Stacy s 2 months ago
I believe she said mom is 63. If this is the U.S., and she is need of money, then she could apply for retirement. Though, to do that, she would have to accept thaf she is not going to get a full time office job, and settle for retirement and a part time retail job. It was a poor decision to withdraw her 401k and spend all of it. I doubt mom will be open to this, but she really should see a doctor. Possible mental health issues or even early onset dementia is possible.
Game Guy 2 months ago
In the US, you don't apply for retirement. You either have enough money or you don't. If you mean start taking social security, if you do that at 63 you will permanently sentence yourself to only getting 75% of your benefits. In general, that's a terrible financial choice.
Load More Replies... Lyone Fein 2 months ago
Firstly, 63 is not elderly. Secondly, the job market has *always* been prejudiced against older women, for at least the past 100 years. Just like in the movies, older men are seen as dignified and experienced leadership material. Whereas older women are unfairly seen as needy and beyond their prime. Regarding this particular person, IDK why she would have so much difficulty with online applications. I am 61 woman, and I do temping sometimes. These things are not that hard, especially if you are familiar with computers. Maybe there are other issues going on?
UpupaEpops 2 months ago
My mother is 65. We've had various computers, laptops and tablets since 96. To this day she needs help with basic things like transferring a file to an external drive. She simply refuses to learn new things and expects other people to do it for her because it's frustrating for her. There's nothing wrong with her memory, she just shuts down at the mere mention of technology. Meanwhile, my 85-year-old grandmother is ordering groceries online all by herself. My best guess is that OP's mum has realised that she messed up and can't cope with the consequences of her own choices. So right now even basics would appear too difficult for her to manage, because she's in full panic mode.
Load More Replies... Stacy s 2 months ago
I believe she said mom is 63. If this is the U.S., and she is need of money, then she could apply for retirement. Though, to do that, she would have to accept thaf she is not going to get a full time office job, and settle for retirement and a part time retail job. It was a poor decision to withdraw her 401k and spend all of it. I doubt mom will be open to this, but she really should see a doctor. Possible mental health issues or even early onset dementia is possible.
Game Guy 2 months ago
In the US, you don't apply for retirement. You either have enough money or you don't. If you mean start taking social security, if you do that at 63 you will permanently sentence yourself to only getting 75% of your benefits. In general, that's a terrible financial choice.
Load More Replies...
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