Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

BoredPanda Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Mom’s Viral Post Shows You Shouldn’t Visit Someone Who Just Gave Birth
74.7K

Mom’s Viral Post Shows You Shouldn’t Visit Someone Who Just Gave Birth

“1 Or 2 Days. Is That Too Much To Ask For?”: Mom’s Touching Post Explains Why They Need Rest After Giving BirthMom Reminds People Of How Desperately They Need To Rest After Giving Birth: Mom-Of-3 Explains Why You Probably Shouldn't Bombard A Woman Who Just Gave Birth With Lots Of AttentionMom Writes An Open Letter About How Impolite And Inconsiderate It Is For People To Rush To Congratulate New MomsMom Explains How Frustrating Visitors Can Be After Giving Birth, Says Mom Shares How Frustrating Visitors Who Can't Wait 1 Or 2 Days To See The Baby Can BeMom Asks 'Visitors' To Give Women Who Just Gave Birth A Break And Her Post Goes ViralMom's Viral Post Shows You Shouldn't Visit Someone Who Just Gave BirthTired Of People Coming To Visit Her Right After She Gave Birth, Mom Writes A Deserved Rant On FacebookTired Of People Coming To Visit Her Right After She Gave Birth, This Mom Writes A Rant And It Goes Viral
ADVERTISEMENT

The birth of a child is a big moment not only for their parents. New grandpas and grandmas, aunts and uncles, and pretty much all relatives and friends want to catch a glimpse of the little bundle of joy. However, in all of this chaos, people might forget the person they should be paying the most attention to. The mother. And it can really wear them down.

Katie Bowman, the “creator of twins and their big sister,” recently wrote an incredibly touching text, explaining the importance of rest for new moms. Shared on her blog Living My Family Life, the post resonated with thousands of women and should become a must-read for everyone who wants to go to the hospital to visit the new family member.

Image credits: livingmyfamilylife

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Katie thinks it’s normal for people to be so excited to see a new baby. “It’s a special moment and they want to be involved. I just think sometimes that overwhelming excitement can sometimes cloud their judgment, and they try to justify that seeing the new baby is more important than listening to what the new mum wants,” she told Bored Panda.

She believes there are only 2 things you can do to get away from this unwanted attention. Either ask for space or demand it when people don’t listen. It’s a very sensitive time and unfortunately, you’re normally made to feel like the bad guy no matter what you say.

ADVERTISEMENT

“I was lucky to have people who wanted to celebrate the life of our daughter, I just had some a bit late, which left me feeling exhausted as shown in my picture, staring at everyone wishing they would leave so I could finally get some sleep. The whole post is not related specifically to my experience, but experiences in general for new mothers. I feel like it’s a subject where mums feel like they have to just take a back seat and allow their newborn to feel like everyone’s property. It’s about reminding everyone that childbirth is a special moment, and they need to remember that with a new baby, there is a new mother. A new mother who is made to feel like she can’t speak up about her own feelings, because apparently everyone else’s feelings are more important at this time.”

The next time she was pregnant, Katie decided to avoid the tricky situation altogether.”For our second pregnancy, we said we probably wouldn’t want visitors at the hospital this time, especially with there being 2 babies. If it was going to be anything like my first birth, I knew I wasn’t going to want to put on a brave face to see anyone. As it was, the twins were a much easier delivery surprisingly and I felt great and ready to see family the next morning,” the mom said.

ADVERTISEMENT

People had a lot to say about Katie’s powerful message

ADVERTISEMENT

The responses her post has received taught Katie that there are loads of mothers who wished they could have had some alone time with their new baby. “It’s a special moment, and it’s something they will never get back. Then there were people who proved exactly what I said. They made it sound like I was a complete drama queen because I wanted some rest instead of visitors. Apparently it’s got to be all or nothing.”

Share on Facebook
Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

Read less »
Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

anonymous

anonymous

Author, Community member

Read more »

This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.

Read less »

anonymous

anonymous

Author, Community member

This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.

What do you think ?
Add photo comments
POST
Viviane
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tiffany Koonter's response had me gobsmacked. Seven years of cutting off contact over a few days of waiting??? Seriously? Because seeing the kid at five days old instead of five hours was so heart-breaking? Are they planning to take this petty c**p to their graves?

Nomadus Aureus
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are weird people like this. My mother is still salty about me not having wanted to go to ballet when I was five. I'm thirty...

Load More Replies...
Demi Zwaan
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Seems like a very personal issue to you. Everyone in my family was very clear about visitors and how they where not allowed in the hospital, not on certain days/hours at home, etc. No problems at all. We always get cards with texts like 'mommy and the baby sleep from 2 to 4pm' or something like that, which means you don't visit at those times.

Alice Laughs
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly. Setting up expectations in advance with clear communication isn't a universal skill, but a great one and can/should be learned! You can be direct and assertive while being kind.

Load More Replies...
Erin
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother and grandmother have always told me that it is impolite to visit someone that had just given birth unless you were invited and I have always followed that rule. I will watch the older spawn if needed (for my best girlfriend, I kept her older two until she got home) or I will send a meal over, and I will text and check in with them, but I DO NOT VISIT UNTIL INVITED. Then I go over to visit and take the little nugget and sniff its head and kiss its cheeks and bite its toes until told to stop.

Ginger Winters
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This! My family and my inlaws all waited till we were home and then waited to be invited. We waited till we had been home a whole 24 hrs before invites went out and then we got swarmed. I believe I took a nap during that time cause I don't remember it

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
Viviane
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tiffany Koonter's response had me gobsmacked. Seven years of cutting off contact over a few days of waiting??? Seriously? Because seeing the kid at five days old instead of five hours was so heart-breaking? Are they planning to take this petty c**p to their graves?

Nomadus Aureus
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are weird people like this. My mother is still salty about me not having wanted to go to ballet when I was five. I'm thirty...

Load More Replies...
Demi Zwaan
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Seems like a very personal issue to you. Everyone in my family was very clear about visitors and how they where not allowed in the hospital, not on certain days/hours at home, etc. No problems at all. We always get cards with texts like 'mommy and the baby sleep from 2 to 4pm' or something like that, which means you don't visit at those times.

Alice Laughs
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly. Setting up expectations in advance with clear communication isn't a universal skill, but a great one and can/should be learned! You can be direct and assertive while being kind.

Load More Replies...
Erin
Community Member
4 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother and grandmother have always told me that it is impolite to visit someone that had just given birth unless you were invited and I have always followed that rule. I will watch the older spawn if needed (for my best girlfriend, I kept her older two until she got home) or I will send a meal over, and I will text and check in with them, but I DO NOT VISIT UNTIL INVITED. Then I go over to visit and take the little nugget and sniff its head and kiss its cheeks and bite its toes until told to stop.

Ginger Winters
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This! My family and my inlaws all waited till we were home and then waited to be invited. We waited till we had been home a whole 24 hrs before invites went out and then we got swarmed. I believe I took a nap during that time cause I don't remember it

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
You May Like
Related on Bored Panda
Related on Bored Panda
Trending on Bored Panda
Also on Bored Panda