In 1995, Cindy Cashman published a book under the pen name Dr. Alan Francis and titled it Everything Men Know About Women. In reality, the book was a gag – all 150 pages of the book were blank, insinuating that men know absolutely nothing about women.
While today, the implication might seem a tad misandrist, it holds a certain amount of truth. In our society, boys grow up socializing with boys, and girls grow up socializing with girls, so, it's natural that one side doesn't know everything about the other.
There's no shame in asking the opposite sex about their experiences. So, when one netizen asked: "Men of Reddit, what's something you've always wanted to ask a woman but thought it would be too embarrassing to ask them?", many guys came to find the answers to questions that have been bothering them for a long time. From how periods and peeing outside work to how women like to be comforted – the gals finally explained the particulars of being a woman.
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Does it appear weird that I have pads and stuff ready, even though I dont need any? My mother once said that would be very nice when I have people over and periods just happens. I agreed to that thought, so I have some in the bathroom.
COVID_KISSES: Nah that might be a lifesaver.
zladuric: Also, clearly mark them in your bathroom. "Spare hygiene products for emergencies". Someone may need it but not know you well enough to ask.
Oh yeah. It's never fun when aunt flo decides to make a surprise visit. Your female friends will silently thank you if you have something on hand for us.
Do you really like men that knows how to cook? 👩🍳.
[deleted]: Absolutely
[deleted]: Of course! It shows you are independent and not relying on me to cook for you.
We love a guy that knows his way around the kitchen. It's incredibly s**y watching guys cook
What should I do to not make you feel threatened when I walk behind you at night? Cross the street?
iiredgm: Try not to walk fast and definitely not directly behind us. Crossing the street sounds like a safe bet in any situation. It'd also help if you took out your phone to play some game or call someone to chat, show you're casual and not a threat
I always assumed periods were a constant stream of blood (like a cut, as another redditor put it). Apparently this is wrong, so how does it work? Small gushes?
takethetrainpls: Imagine you've got some runny jam that has a few bits of strawberry. Put it in a funnel and move it around.
sterlingrose: And if you’ve been sitting or lying down for a while and you stand up, it’s like a jam tsunami.
Just imagine your cut suddenly gushes if you stand up. Most of the time it's fine but sometimes yeah you can feel a gush
Oh boy here we go.
***ahem***
HOW DO YOU LIVE WITHOUT DEEP POCKETS IN YOUR PANTS??
BookWormBookStorm: IT'S HORRIBLE AND IT MAKES US SAD!
And we have to spend money on handbags!
Have you ever seen any females reaction when someone says "cute shirt/dress" if it has pockets they dam near yell at you in excitement and say "IT HAS POCKETS!"
Other than the obvious (lying, cheating, rude to you or your friends)what’s the quickest way for your S.O, or someone you’re interested in, to lose your respect?
[deleted]: How they act towards strangers and animals
sopranobanjo: Being unkind to people you aren’t attracted to, especially other women
tired-students-club: Not contributing to household things to the point of having to remind you to do basic tasks. I’m your partner, not your mother.
Weaponized incompetence and unresolved childhood issues. Personal development is your friend!
Do you really like it when men roll up their sleeves?
LJGHunter: Yes. Can't really tell you why. Something about the forearms. It's important to note that it's a phenomenon specific to having long sleeves that are rolled up; a shirt with three quarter sleeves does not produce the same effect.
zoeydoey: Roll up sleeves, lift something, reach for something, whatever. Just show me those forearms.
What is the obsession with murder? The whole serial killer book/podcast industry seems largely female oriented. Ironically many females I know who love this stuff also hate fake violence in fictional movies?
Glowingrose: I’m taking notes so I don’t make the mistakes they made that got them caught.
Honestly though, it’s a combination of the psychological aspect (why did they do it, what was going on in their head, what made them the way they are) and the forensic/investigation side of things. I also know some women who watch them in part to learn in some way how not to be the victim of crimes likes those featured.
Makes sense. I watched the whole S*x & The City series and thought "Ok, not this."
What's a good vibe/attitude that makes you feel good?
[deleted]: I can’t speak for every woman, but be yourself. Don’t make everything sexual, actually engage in conversation about something. One thing that just kills the vibe for me, is trying to make everything sexual.
LisaFrankTattoo: Piggybacking on this. Dudes, we know if you’re talking to us, you’re probably interested. You don’t have to sexual innuendo the f**k out of us.
When you are really upset, how would you like your partner to respond or comfort you?
MelanisticCrow: Be empathetic, hold her(if she's comfortable with that), listen, and ask if she wants your advice. If she doesn't, just be a good listener and don't make her feel like she's to blame or that her feelings aren't valid.
[deleted]: “Do you want me to listen or are you looking for advice?” has been a game changer in my relationships.
The "ask if they want advice' really hit me, I'm all ears and then I give advice, but never asked if they wanted it. So much to learn.
What do period pains feel like?
happyjeep_beep_beep: A Charlie horse cramp but in your lower abdomen.
QueenOfSleeping: Differs from person to person, but they feel like someone is grabbing the inside of your stomach and squeezing it to a pulp inside their fist, while also shoving a knife in and out of your gut. And you can’t forget about the random back pains throughout. Really fun times 😅
Get a e-stem, they're pretty cheep, put it on your lower stomach (based on 1-12 level machine) set it to pulse at a 5-6 that's a normal cramp day for a lot of women. Some women have 1-3 days where it'll be a 10-12 or even higher than the machine goes. Also the machines are targeted and a lot of women get both targeted pain as well as back pain, migraines, diarrhea, vomiting as well as all over pain. Then labor x all that by a trillion for 10-30+ hrs straight. S**t is NO JOKE! Have some f*****g empathy women are bad a*s tough!
Would you like to build Lego Star Wars sets with me.
[deleted]: Damn you must be rich
According to popular culture girls want the bad boys and they want to "fix" them.
How true is this and granted that there is any truth to it. What success rate do you have?
suspicious_succubus: Ages 14-18 it's pretty true
Above 18 ( unless mentally stupid or still childish) not true at all.
As young girls we get the feeling ( from books and movies) that any bad boy will change for you cause they love you so much.
When you grow up reality hits you and you know that most people stay the same. So once a bad boy always a shitty asshole. And we do not need a shitty asshole as our partner
How do you do the math and physics for when you pee outside ? Some of my female friends took postures straight out of a yoga book and never made a mess.
Enragedfrog: Squat making sure your feet are not down hill or in any low points. Pee
The_Nice_Marmot: Make sure the back waistband of your pants isn’t in the line of fire. Learned that the hard way.
Have heard what not to do on a date mostly but what are the top things a guy can do on a date? Without coming off as awkward or weird?
LJGHunter:
Your looks will count for a little more in the beginning because I don't know you very well. But if you come across as decent, charming and confident, looks start to fade into the background.
My husband is never going to win any 'hot guy' awards. He's a bit overweight, going grey, wears glasses and has more hair on his back than on his head. But I immediately fell in love with his personality; he's everything I've ever wanted in a man on the inside, so I honestly don't care what the outside looks like.
Just be a decent conversationalist. That means talk that goes back and forth. Makes a huge difference. And be your genuine self. That kind of confidence is s**y.
Do you pee every time you poop too?
1jooper: I pee before I poo, then poo, then do a little finishing up post poo pee
What’s the deal with peeing together?
thickthighs20: Do you remember in Harry Potter when Hermione went by herself and got attacked by a TROLL.
DI93: Safety in numbers. Also we like to reapply make up or have a little gossip by ourselves, sometimes it just nice to go with someone else and continue whatever conversation you were previously having.
Can you cover your urethral hole with your finger, and direct the concentrated spray, liked with a tap?
splashysoup: I have no idea, but what I know is that if you kind of "lift" your stuff from above the clit and spread the labia you can aim better and also further.
I like your thinking BTW
saucy-Mama: Tested:
Result: No you just get piss on your finger.
Observation: it drips down your finger, then your hand is just warm and smells like piss.
Conclusion: i don’t recommend trying but if someone has a better outcome we can compile our research.
Oh and don’t forget to wash your hands or you’ll smell like pee and make people uncomfortable (also tested)
I don't know which is a bigger why- why would you think of doing that? or why would you test it? I get curiosity but...even if it did work, you still put your finger in your pee on purpose...
If a man offered you a fresh ham, instead of flowers, how would you feel? Would you stop dating him?
raptor_of_truth: Would prefer a fresh rotisserie chicken.
My opinion of him would instantly rise. Thinking outside the chocolate box.
If bras give support then why does it feel good when you take them off? Would it feel good to never wear a bra?
Extension_Drummer_85: Have you ever worn really tight jeans? They hold everything in place but the firm contact all day gets a bit much. Not wearing a bra if you have larger breasts can be pretty uncomfortable. It hurts your back (bras help a little by holding everything in centre so your gravity isn’t too funky), your breast hurt if you move too much, you get sweat under your boobs where they touch your skin. Not fun for everyone. Also it can be uncomfortable when your nipples rub against your clothes from excess movement.
What‘s the most neutral and comfortable to start a conversation (maybe at a bar), without being too shy or too agressive/rude?
General_Organa: For me commenting on what’s going on around us. If you’ve tried the cocktails before and want to share opinions, if there’s a game on and I’m looking up at the tv, if there’s a couple on a first date nearby, whatever. The really important thing is to get a good read on if the response is polite vs engaged. If I give you a “yeah” with nothing else stop trying lol even if I smiled or whatever
butterbewbs: This is the only answer I agree with. The others are too “I like your hair, you’re pretty etc” and compliments creep me out bc I know where that conversation is going. Talk to me like you would another man sitting at the bar. (I’m a bartender, I listen all day) Don’t immediately come for my looks. My boyfriend is my best friend & was before he was my boyfriend.
If I were a woman, I think I'd hate having men try to flatter me by referring to my beauty. Would you rather have men talk about your intellect, personality, and accomplishments before your beauty?
hannahrichter: on a surface level interaction, you should compliment things they CHOSE. like, hey cool shirt, sick shoes, awesome tattoo. don't use creepy adjectives like hot, sexy, I had some guy refer to me as nubile. don't do that stuff.
I don’t mind a compliment like I’m cute or attractive or have great eyes. Telling me you liked my b***s before I actually agreed to let you touch them would be awkward.
When we are laying in bed and I turn to face the other direction, I’m not avoiding you. I want you to big spoon me. Can we please make that a more normal thing?
QueenOfSleeping: Just ask her to be the big spoon when you turn over. She’ll probably like the chance to get to cuddle you too
[deleted]: Just tell her you wanna be hugged. I guess most girls don't do that because we're usually smaller than our bf so we don't really feel like a big spoon, but a backpack
How much do appearances count compared to personality, when it comes to being asked out?
sslyn94: Me and my friends always joke about how “medium” guys go to “hot” when you start liking their personality. This might mean it’ll take more time to get a girl there, but just think how ugly a “beautiful” person becomes when you hate their personality. It works the opposite way as well
IMHO Regardless of how you look, being clean, smelling good (soap and deodorant are very acceptable scents) , and looking halfway put together (hair either cut within the last few weeks or styled in some way that doesn't look like you rolled out of bed), clothing that is decent fitting, no stains/holes, and age/location appropriate clothing - the shirts with cartoons or games on them are great but if you are looking to connect with someone new, don't limit yourself to only people who would appreciate that shirt- adds a few 'points' to your looks and then you can let your personality shine after you get past the initial connection.
Do you agree that ”guys” and ”dudes” are gender neutral?
[deleted]: In certain contexts, yes. In others, no. English is weird in which some words can have different meanings or connotations depending on how you use them. “Hey you guys!” mostly means “hey you people of no specific gender” but when someone says “I’ve f**ked two guys in the past week” they’re obviously talking about men and not anyone else.
How do you all make those little towel hats when you get out of the shower?
78Carnage: Imagine you have your towel across your back, both ends in each hand, flip you hair forward so you're bent over roughly 90°, being the towel forward so it's completely draped over your head until the edge of the towel that was touching your thighs, is now at the base of your hairline on the back of your neck, the towel is now draped over your head, grab the drape and twist it a few times, then toss it back. Give it a try! You don't even need hair to do it!
Why has the female clothing pockets rebellion not started yet?
Naalbindr: I’m starting it! I make kits so that you can DIY your own pockets on anything that has a side seam.
My mom is a quilter/seamstress now that she retired. First thing she does after buying pants is get out the thread ripper.
Does offering cheese really work?
Edit: fascination levels have been elevated.
papayaseth: Only if it's gouda
Edit: the amount of people that know what movie I'm referencing makes me so freaking happy
How do many of you have such nice skin?
I want to be silky smooth too.
TerrifyinglyAlive: Women have about twice as much subcutaneous body fat as men, and thinner skin. It makes you soft.
mothwhimsy: Part daily moisturizer part the magic of estrogen
In a book/piece of writing, what do you think is the best way to describe a woman in a sexual context without being too crude or cliche or getting into the whole "she breasted boobily down the stairs" thing?
(i'm a writer but i would feel WAY too awkward asking any of my girl friends this 💀 writing women characters isn't hard for me per se, you just give them goals, development and make them add to the story like anybody else. but i'm always second guessing myself when it comes to writing stuff in an intimate context)
peachpinkjedi: Focus less on describing the physical attributes and more on the feeling of being in her presence. Focus on things she does consciously in the scene, or at least things that aren't gratuitously cliche (ie breasting boobily). When you do go for the physical description it'ss always neat to see a male character's physical attraction to a female character center on less obvious things (maybe her neck, her hands, her jawline, even her eyes would work in this context despite being somewhat stereotypical).
I laughed so hard at the breasted boobily thing that i knocked down a bunch of stuff near me.
If someone respectfully confesses they have had a crush on you but don't really expect anything out of it how would you react?
cf-myolife: If they don't expect anything and I am not in love, just stay friend and move on. But once one of my friend suddenly told me he was in love while I made really clear that I absolutely didn't want to date anyone at this point, I tried to stay friend but after that he was acting like we were a couple wtf?? So I had to block him, hopefully we aren't on the same campus.
How on earth are you sexually attracted to any of us?
FightWithTools926: I am only sexually attracted to one of you and it was mostly his rolled up sleeves that did it.
Derpazor1: Thought about this a lot as kid. Women are beautiful but men were not. Then puberty hit. Those “manly” features are super attractive now. I really love men shoulders and arms. Especially the way they look when my husband is on top of me holding himself up. I also love male butts. The long shape is amazing. Why? No idea.
What do you want guys to do when your upset or mad about something. When I asked what happened I got no answer. When I asked how I can help I got no answer. When I asked if we were ok no answer. So what do I do in that situation if you won’t explain what you need, even if it’s for me to get list for a couple of days.
MothsEyesOfHorror: Everyone is a bit different with this, but my general tip or trick is to offer 3 things.
1."Do you want a distraction?" Then offer something like a movie, a game, puzzle, who knows if you are brave mby even offer to do her make up/nails for fun, or find some fun facts about animals and talk to her about those.
2."Do you want to talk about it?" If yes then there needs to be a follow up question. "Do you want me to problem solve with you or just listen?". Problem solving is when you listen and then offer some solutions to what happened. Listening means, sitting down and speaking mostly in "Yeah" "I get that" "That sucks", try not to insert yourself more than short answers.
3."Do you want some space?" Then you ask for how long or even offer something like "I can come back in an hour and check on you.". Its nice to add something along the lines of "Just text me if you need anything"/"I'll be in the next room if you need me"
This generaly works for everyone even on children, man, sometimes confused and angry adults. Just maintain calm and welcoming face.
“Do you actually answer the s*x questions aimed at women on AskReddit or is it all men?”.
TipiTapi: The correct answer is: they answer but its the 80% male population that decides what gets upvoted.
I think you know what this causes...
Atom_Bomb_Bullets: As a woman, this is 100% true. The number of times I have to scroll through walls of bad advice to get to the good stuff near the bottom is astounding.
True that... I've seen a thread where WOMEN were asked what should men do to capture their interest, and one of the top comments was a dude recommending a book written by some condescending (male) "evolutionary psychologist".
What are pads used for ? (I wanted to ask this when I was a child coz I just knew that it was something related to their private parts).
CashDecklin: To soak up the blood, the menstrual blood.
Slaytanic_Amarth: I read this to the tune of the Monster Mash, and I can't stop laughing now. Truly I am a child at heart lol
Does men wearing makeup look decent? Asking for both just the little bit of make up and the times it's full flamboyant greatness.
Asking for... A friend... Yeah, let's go with that.
jessicuzzz: makeup looks great on anyone as long as it’s done well! i say go for it, practice makes perfect
So...how do you feel about guys you find attractive wearing thongs and g-strings?
theswamphag: I find them very uncomfortable so I don't understand why you would want to.
I’m a straight guy that has a lot of female friends! If I were to guess, I’d have like an 80/20 ratio of female to male friends.
I’ve always been that way because I can’t talk about emotional/deep stuff with males.
What would you, as a woman think, especially if I may be romantically interested in you?
Edit: Poor question on my part. What would you think if you are a woman I just met that I am romantically interested in but found out that I have all these female friends?!
Thriving-confusion: Friends are one thing. The issue isn’t about having female friends. The issue is more of having appropriate boundaries with your female friends. Men are sometimes oblivious to their “friends” liking them. And these women tend to seek attention on purpose to try and make you see they are better than your “girl.” And if you don’t set this straight instantly, then there is an issue.
Completely works both ways! And if you've got jealousy issues (no matter the gender) you should really see a professional about it. It almost ALWAYS is due to unresolved trauma. Same goes for wanting to make someone else jealous.
Is there really a couch in the ladies room?
Sanchastayswoke: It depends. In some nicer places or old school department stores or churches. Women sometimes use them to sit & breastfeed their babies.
inmyelement: Fancy places
The old movie theatre I used to love going to (now they mostly just do private functions) had a restroom with couches and mirrors and the toilets and sinks were in a connected room. It was very art deco. People rarely sat on the couches though because the lines were always really long and everyone was rushing to get to the toilet before the intermission ended (and hopefully have time to get choc tops too).
How important is manscaping on a scale of 1-10.
erinnteeter: As long as everything is clean I'm fine with it. Unless the hair is out of control.
mothwhimsy: If you're trying to get your d**k s**ked, at least a 9. No one wants pube teeth. If not, eh. Looking somewhat groomed is nice but I personally am not too worried about it.
Just f*****g shower! Use soap, scrub it all down and wear deodorant for f**k's sake.
How do you shampoo long hair? I've always had short hair, so lather and rinse is pretty easy, but with long hair I feel like it would get complicated quickly.
COVID_KISSES: With shampoo you basically get used to massaging it directly on your scalp and the rest of your hair kinda rinses out along with any dirt as you wash away the shampoo. You focus on your scalp because that's where things get greasy and you don't want the bottoms of your hair to get too dry. This is why you also focus the conditioner towards the ends of your hair.
Do women play with their own breasts out it boredom? Like randomly squeeze them.
Apozerycki1: I do and it actually helped me!
I was just laying in bed one day, playing with my boobs and I noticed a lump. Eventually went to the doctor and they were like, “oh, were you doing a self exam when you found it?” And I had to be like, “well, no…”
I ended up getting a biopsy and it was a fibroadenoma (benign common tumor in younger women) but I basically had to skirt around the fact that I found the lump from feeling my tits in bed. No one ever asked directly, I just avoided being specific when they asked how I found it.
MothsEyesOfHorror: Absolutly. Sometimes you just hold them c its comfy.
As far as I can tell, leggings are one of the most universal / flexible pieces of clothing a woman can wear and still remain as casual as jeans, but as comfy as pjs, YET you always manage to look hella good regardless of what top you pair with leggings.
What the f**k do you wear with leggings / how do you always seem to pair it correctly? (Correctly being it never looks like something you wouldn’t pair with it).
peachpinkjedi:
Leggings are super versatile and actually come in a bunch of different styles! I like to balance leggings, which are of course tight to the body, with looser and flowy tops or even dresses (and if I wear baggy sweats or flowy pants, I'll do a tighter top. I like that balance).
I don't like wearing leggings with something that doesn't come down below my butt (after stupid comments I can't escape from). Usually I just wear them under dresses because I get cold easily but still want to look summery.
If you have a wife, there is no question too embarassing to ask.
OhNoTokyo: If you have a wife, they will answer the embarrassing questions when just talking about their day, before you even thought to ask them.
Why do you match on dating apps, then ghost after one message? I didn't even get the chance to blow it yet.
bulbousbirb: I wouldn't ghost after one message but I would if the conversation was going nowhere. I can kind of tell early on how engaging they're going to be.
finallymakingareddit: Honestly we just don't have time. Usually when you match a bunch of people you end up just prioritizing the few you were really interested in/had a really good start to a convo. Sometimes you were iffy about swiping on the person and then their first message was meh, so you decide against them.
If your first message is “Hi!” I’m sorry, but it’s over. Whenever I message a man I make sure to read his profile and ask or comment on something related. Usually leaving enough room for a nice open answer back. And all the work you can put in is to say “Hi!” Ugh. “hi.” Now what?
I hate these threads because a lot of the questions assume that women are part of a hive mind. Like we can’t give you the secret to dating women when we’re all different, bro.
[deleted]: I feel like this one is very respectful. I've spent a few hours here lol
mikess314: The thing is, it doesn’t matter that you aren’t a hive mind. Go to the AskWomen sub. It’s impossible to ask women anything in AskWomen. You get downvoted and chastised for daring to utilize the sub for its intended purpose and then the mods have their fun.
Now go ask anything you want on AskMen. Massive diversity of opinions. Nobody shitting on OP unless they genuinely deserve it. No sticks up any butts.
So please, enough with the “wE’Re nOt A hiVE mINd” reactions. The diversity of responses is what we want.
Even if the questions assumed that, the answers will show different. Keep the conversation going, that's how you get to know stuff
Do you get the pee shivers too?
23san: Yes
Naalbindr: What are pee shivers?
exoxe: When you are peeing and your body shivers/shakes at a certain point during the process. Can't remember the last time I had it happen but I do remember it when I was younger.
Will you be my girlfriend.
Rainshine93: Sure
[deleted]: No, but you can be my girlfriend.
How do you feel about the apparent avocado shortage in the United States?
Tera-chan: There’s an avocado shortage?
I'm a bit annoyed at the rising price of chocolate though, nearly doubled in the last year
Do you guys get 2 streams of pee like us sometimes.
OliveRyder: Sometimes
StCecilia98: Sometimes it’s like the flat/mist setting on the hose
Pelvic floor tears from childbirth can be a cause, also medical issues like bladder stones, prolapse, etc. Not good though Dr. needed usually.
Poll Question
What do you think about the idea of men having many unanswered questions about women?
It's understandable
It's surprising
It's concerning
It's humorous
These are excellent and needed. I truly hope questions like this are asked more often as well as read and legit heard.
These are excellent and needed. I truly hope questions like this are asked more often as well as read and legit heard.