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Life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, high salaries and breezing by on ‘easy mode’ when you’re a man. No matter your gender, life is challenging. Your purpose isn’t handed to you on a silver platter. And happiness isn’t a guarantee if you don’t strive to move toward it. And there are a lot of things that guys would love everyone to know about what it’s actually like to be a man. Though, sometimes, we’re far too shy to say them out loud.

However, anonymity helps. Internet users have taken to Reddit to share the most annoying things about being a guy, after being prompted to open up their hearts by user u/justjuiced22. The answers, which you’ll find below, are candid and range from the silly-yet-relatable to the more serious. Have a read through the posts as you scroll down and upvote the ones that you agree with or that you were surprised by.

Do you have some thoughts on your mind that you’d like to share with the other readers? That’s what the comment section is there for, Pandas. So don’t be shy, share your own insights about the viral Reddit thread and what these men’s answers say about society, below.

I reached out to fitness expert Jack Bly for a few comments about masculinity, confidence, and men's issues. Here's what he had to say. "I’d say biggest issues that men have to deal with nowadays revolve around their inputs. Social media, TV, music, etc. Most people have inputs that constantly spout negativity and victim mentality. These inputs ultimately dictate their thoughts and as a result of their actions," he told Bored Panda. Scroll down for the full interview with Jack.

#1

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) When I'm out alone with my toddler a lot of women look at me as if I'm an anomaly and a lot of guys look at me as if I'm being forced to do this. Like the "oof sorry bro" face.

It's weird that being a good dad is apparently such a rare thing that when I'm fully in charge of my son people assume there's something wrong with me and my partners relationship. I just like spending time with my son and pushing a stroller doesn't make me less of a man.

thicchaggisboi , Mohamed Awwam Report

According to fitness expert Jack, the biggest issue for men is not having a purpose in life. That, in turn, affects all areas of a person's life. " I believe the core of being a good man is in true purpose. Men without purpose tend to be unhappy, depressed, lost," Jack shared his thoughts with Bored Panda.

"Figure out your purpose by getting clear on your values and what’s most important to you. As far as activities go, I’m always an advocate of pursuing good health as that is our foundation for our mind, energy, and mood."

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Jack added that he believes there "absolutely" is "a crisis for confidence among men." In his view, the reasons for this are obvious. "Most men have no reason to be confident. 73% are overweight, 80% are in debt, 50% are divorced. The best thing men can do to overcome this is to commit to the journey of self-development and finding their purpose," he said.

The expert advocates pursuing excellence in health, wealth, and relationships. "When you do this, you provide yourself true reasons to build confidence."

#2

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Male eating disorders get zero attention.

JadedTrekkie , Samuel Ramos Report

#3

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Getting very few/no compliments from my SO. I want to be told nice things about myself too.

Aneides , Jakob Owens Report

The thread links to the broader discussion of what guys and ‘real men’ should and shouldn’t do, what behaviors are frowned upon by society, and understanding of masculinity leads to a healthy, happy lifestyle.

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A short while ago, I spoke about men’s issues and masculinity with redditor M_RONA who gave some great in-depth insights on the topic.

"I think, as men, we need to be more open about our issues and acknowledge the fact that we face some tough [stuff], often imposed on us by other guys. There’s nothing wrong with being honest about what’s bothering us, and I think just being able to talk about some of the issues we face would be a major contributing factor to our general well-being. Something as simple as just asking our friends how they’re doing in life could go a long way!" he told Bored Panda in an honest and open interview.

#4

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Dealing with other men. The number of testosterone poisoned, porcelain figurine fragile ego having bastards seems endless.

The_Unreal , John Arano Report

#5

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The assumption that because I am the father that I don't know, or am incapable of taking care of my kids. People ask my wife all the time if she needs to rush home when she leaves the kids with me. I am not a babysitter, I know what I am doing.

dyeson , Steven Van Loy Report

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#6

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Not being able to talk about our emotions. Like hello, hi, I am a human being who would like to talk about their problems without the feeling of being judged.

Agent527 , Nik Shuliahin Report

According to M_RONA, one thing that’s happening in modern times is that the term ‘toxic masculinity’ gets taken way out of context, gets used where it shouldn’t, and sometimes misrepresents reality.

"While I absolutely agree that there are many male traits taken to the extreme that have horrible consequences for the people around them, I think the term is sadly being overused to mislabel normal and perfectly healthy male behavior," he explained.

The interviewee noted that it’s often other men who pressure guys into conforming and acting a certain way. This, in turn, can make it very hard for men to be emotionally vulnerable when they need to be.

#7

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) This might seem petty or dumb, but right now, my fiancée and I are planning our wedding (She's female, I'm Male, we're a hetero couple).

I'm SUPER into the planning. I'm not at all a typical "macho" "cant be bothered with the frills and pomps" type of dude. I'm having fun helping putting together this day for my best friend and I!

Everytime we meet with a vendor they solely talk to her and ignore me entirely, acting on an assumption that she's a typical "Bridezilla" planning this day single handedly and I'm just some Bro she's shacking up with. When I do pitch in, the vendors almost act in an "ooooook, dont worry big guy, leave this to the adults" kind of way. It's more obvious in some than it is in others, but its damn infuriating. It's extremely frustrating and belittling. My fiancée is aware of it, and sticks up for me when necessary.

Like snap dude, you're damn straight I've got an opinion on the aesthetic of our f@#$ing orchid placement, take me seriously!

bucketbiz9429 , Jeremy Wong Weddings Report

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#8

Being physically and mentally abused usually means a lot less to people than if it were a girl who were the victim. If the girl's the abuser and you're the victim almost no one will care at all and will almost always shame you for it. And when you try to defend yourself against a female, you're looked at like the monster

Constant_Alternative Report

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#9

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Not being socially acceptable to carry a purse.

Like yeah, I'd love to always have my earbuds, phone charger, deodorant, small cologne sampler, and be able to store my keys, wallet, and phone without either stabbing my legs with keys when the pants are tight or having my phone slip out when I'm getting out of cars with loose fitting pants. I can think of so many things I'd bring in my man purse...

x_Pyro Report

“A lot of guys were talking about how, as a man, they found it extremely difficult to talk and be open about their feelings. I think that stems from this notion that men are supposed to be so hardened and stoic that we never let things get to us, and if we ever experience a negative emotion, we shouldn’t process it, we should just bottle it up and 'be a man.'"

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According to M_RONA, having a stoic attitude and a hardened mind are “certainly virtuous values” that help in life. But if these values are taken to the extreme and repress any and all emotions, the end result can be very harmful.

“The basic attitude of 'men should do this, and women should do that' is hampering to both men and women, I think, something both sexes are guilty of doing, unfortunately," M_RONA shared with Bored Panda.

"I think we all face issues of conformity and set expectations for what we’re supposed to do, and I guess it’s up to all of us to promote and cheer on people who don’t fit into certain categories that we make for ourselves.”

#10

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Honestly, I think the most annoying thing is the competitiveness of other males. Especially when it comes to women. I’ve been out with gfs and some dude will come up and blatantly start hitting on her. We’d make it apparent that we’re together and then the ridicule starts. “You’re with this guy?” “I bet he really sucks at ____.” “I could be better than him.” That alpha male s**t bugs the hell out of me.

DoorNo_5 , Marvin Meyer Report

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#11

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) I'm 20, have no facial hair, very little muscle mass (barely started working out this year), almost no stamina, kissless, virgin, got slapped at a party recently (by some drunk dude), and I collect action figures (I'm still working on not being too ashamed of this one).

I feel like a total loser sometimes. Like I'm not a real man. It hurts, but at the same time I don't want to try to put on a fake man mask or anything. I guess I'm just too young to figure these things out.

FerminFermin115 Report

#12

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Walking into a public restroom and getting your shoes stuck to the ground because of all the dried piss on the floor.

gyroggg , Oliver Hale Report

Meanwhile, British psychotherapist Silva Neves told Bored Panda that toxic masculinity is mostly centered around a “general attitude perpetuated by systemic misogyny” than specific behaviors. 

He detailed that at the core of these “distorted ideas” lie things like the notion that men should “always be winners,” shouldn’t feel any vulnerability, and shouldn’t be perceived as weak or soft.

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“Men with toxic masculinity usually have negative views towards women's rights (including their rights to the freedom of their own sexuality) and they tend to be homophobic,” the expert said.

“A man with healthy masculinity is the opposite to these traits: someone who is self-reflective, embraces their emotions including sadness, anxiety and crying, a man who isn't afraid of their own femininity and believes that women are equal, and therefore are very clear about respecting boundaries and consent with women.”

#13

Being told that my emotions don't matter. You know what happens when people bottle up their emotions? They either kill themselves or end up on the 6:00 news.

Mr_Gibus Report

#14

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The stigma that every time I talk to a woman I don't know I automatically want to date them. Like f**k maybe I like talking to women because men don't open up about feelings and women actually listen just lookin for a friend man.

Xsendox , Christin Hume Report

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#15

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Less annoying and more upsetting but: The lack of mental health outreach for men.

Kooba9 , Nathan McDine Report

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kjorn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i saw and heard some woman in the news just says stuff like: to hell with mens, we are more important, it's our turn. this is just some shitty way to think. it wasn't ok to threat woman like that before but it's not ok to take revenge at those who wasn't even there when all that happen

Nikki Sevven
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a woman, I have to say that women like that are not better than misogynists. They want to end the patriarchy solely to install a matriarchy, not a society of equals. If your reason for being a feminist is to be superior to men, you're not a feminist; you're a misandrist.

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Karina Andersen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

again parents need to communicate with their kids from when they are little, communication & education are key factors in helping their kids

otplus
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Speaking from experience this is really a big problem, since we are teached to not express our emotions this can get really problematic. I got diagnosed only when i was sick enough to put my fist through a wall out of desperation. In the it was not a psychological problem, but even then it gets really bad.

Deutschland Mädchen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Crying is a human thing ok? If people are making fun of you for it go find some different friends or hang out with girls.

Phil Vaive
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've said this a few times - It's not possible for most young men to "stop hanging out" with their parents, stepparents, aunts and uncles, grandparents, teachers, classmates, etc. And acting like it's just one or two people "making fun" of a kid for showing emotion is entirely disingenuous, and serves only to minimize the issue. It's not a simple solution to deal with a lifetime of being taught to repress our emotions.

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#16

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Shopping for clothes. I've noticed in every clothing store, we have this small corner in the back of the store for our clothes then the rest of the store is 95% female clothing.

imalonleyguytbh , Alexander Kovacs Report

#17

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) You're expected to just deal with a lot of things that girls would get help with.

tastehbacon , Kelly Sikkema Report

#18

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Everything in your life is a competition. Every. F***ing. Thing.

smarmageddon , Randy Fath Report

#19

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being called weak if I show any emotion.

ExoticStories , Ali Jouyandeh Report

#20

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) All the societal pressure that on you to initiate, fix, pay, provide etc.

Neptune-Jr , rupixen.com Report

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#21

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being judged almost exclusively on one's financial stability, in an economy that makes financial stability very difficult to achieve.

green_meklar , Emil Kalibradov Report

#22

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) The male stereotypes. Sometimes a guy needs to cry and just let stuff out. Or being strong and doing physical work isn't his thing.

BlacktheMew , David Billings Report

#23

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Always being expected to make the first move towards the woman.

dailydonuts16 , Benjamin Ashton Report

#24

Living in fear of being labeled as a "creep" or "pervert" for trying to talk to a girl

Al-cicada Report

#25

Used to be getting random b*ners at inappropriate times. Now, it's not being able to get a b*ner at appropriate times.

NastyLittleBagginses Report

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#26

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Having to feel I have to stay quiet about the way I feel about my body

Michael_Scarn427 , Siora Photography Report

#27

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Being the person to go check out the noise that just happened in a creepy place, to promptly be brutally murdered by some evil demon spirit

GiveMeYerBelt , Pawel Czerwinski Report

#28

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Probably the fact that we're expected to have the courage to approach women at bars or wherever else, which wouldn't be so intimidating if the perception of said flirting didn't depend entirely on how attractive they happen to find us. We're told "the worst thing she can do is say no" but it feels pretty s**tty when she and her friends straight up laugh as you walk away, or even worse, to your face. As someone fairly middle of the road in terms of looks, it's like "Oh boy, am I gonna have a fun conversation or are she and her friends gonna laugh at me, let's roll those dice!!!" Most of the women I talk to who decide they're not interested are polite about it and I appreciate those people, but some are just mean, and most of us guys aren't quite as emotionless as we're supposed to be. That stuff is a big feels bad.

GiacchinoFrost , Alex Voulgaris Report

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#29

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Baldness. Some can make it work for them, but most can't.

sd_glokta , Shivam Dewan Report

#30

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Trying to shave those damn hairs on your Adam’s apple without slicing your throat open

L4chie , Supply Report

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#31

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) People saying that men alone with their kids are "babysitting"

Jay_Diddly , EIELEI Report

#32

Never being approached by women. I'm sure it also has to do alot with looks but I can't really change that and multiple back to back rejections make you less interested in trying to initiate, you just feel like a bother at a certain point.

Jwallthemonster Report

#33

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Society's view of what's masculine when you're a straight small male that doesn't try to be super masculine.

[deleted] , Roman Holoschchuk Report

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#34

People instantly assuming you’re a pedophile when you try to talk to younger girls. Like can’t I just be nice. Girls aren’t judged when they talk to younger guys.

flabagoose19 Report

#35

I'm in Iran and in Iran, men must perform a 2 years Forced military service after age 18 in a really bad situation and if you don't you can't travel to another country! as a male it's really annoying for me because I don't want to waste 2 years of my life.

SMMousavi Report

#36

I hate shaving my face so often.

baldmannbob Report

#37

Assuming everything doesn't mean anything to me. Like I love my friends and girlfriend, I like my stuff, people don't seem to get that

Confusion777 Report

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#38

People assuming youre gay for liking certain things like;

"girly" drinks

listening to Lady Gaga/One direction/madonna (for example)

not liking sports

hanging out with girls

being dramatic Like, its just weird. This doesnt stop me from doing this, but the fact that guys are made to feel ashamed for these things is horrible. (Nothing wrong with being gay, its just not that fun when youre actually NOT gay.)

nonstop-anxiety Report

#39

Other guys being completely disgusting in public restrooms, there's f***ing puddles in front of the urinal, hair on the bottom of the urinal, toilet paper strewn across the place, and they don't flush sometimes even when #2. Gross.

[deleted] Report

#40

Nobody really cares about your well-being except your mom.

[deleted] Report

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#41

Men Get Real About What Sucks About Being A Man (30 Answers) Men’s swimming suits. . The mesh on the inside rubs and chafes your upper thighs. The only solution is to either wear speedos (gross) or underwear under my shorts while swimming.

bedfordguyinbedford , Zachary Shea Report

#42

Being told that you are privileged by people with more money and privilege than you.

rtfcandlearntherules Report

#43

Everyone expects me to lift and carry the heavy s**t.

Turnipstew Report

#44

Most girls expecting you to pay for everything all the time.

z50rking Report

#45

The way pee sprays in unpredictable directions sometimes

foxtailavenger Report

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#46

Tough guys always looking for a fight.

mutt_butt Report

#47

I'm less likely to be offered help.

mickecd1989 Report

#48

I do not really like much of anything about it. Male parts kind of get in the way a lot, and I am always worried that they stand out, because if they do then others will find me creepy. Also I sweat a lot! And it is smelly and I do not like that. Perhaps it is strange, but I kind of really wish that I could smell nice! And... I do kind of want to try to wear a dress, but I feel like that would attract negative attention. I feel like everything I want to do is the exact opposite of what would be masculine and I hate it

Maggykitty Report

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#49

We are expected to be sex experts. I had sex only once, don't expect too much from me.

sado_please Report

#50

It feels wrong to cry. I just finished season 3 of stranger things and cried. It was a good but sad moment.

TitaniumTryton Report

#51

Feeling pressured to earn a high salary.

mrkeyrose Report

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#52

Not being able to hide flaws as well as women can.

ApexPOG Report

#53

Expectations of the society, Which will inevitably and conveniently vary based on the circumstances, and more often than not, once fulfilled, you'd still be largely uncredited for, since that's what Men/guys are "supposed" to do.

TonyStark39 Report

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#54

Having to make the first move.

maskedstranger17 Report

#55

The automatic assumption that we should be the ones responsible for handling the vast majority of physically demanding, or otherwise difficult or unpleasant tasks in virtually any scenario involving both men and women.

StewTrue Report

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#56

Peeing, then shaking it, even dabbing the tip with a square of tissue...but still dribbling a little piss in my drawers. Also, ass hair.

Thomcat_13 Report

#57

When you are single you are supposed to be the aggressive but not too aggressive....and that amount varies according to the girl. Some women prefer to be the initiator but that's rare.

MexElf Report

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#58

Singleness. Wanting something that's out of my reach(companionship). Life would be so much easier if I simply did not want a girlfriend. It's not like women are to blame. I don't resent anyone other than myself for it. But I hate that I want something that is out of my ability to control. It's inconvenient and causes a lot of suffering.

NauticalFork Report

#59

Hearing girls complain all the time how hard it is being a girl. Because obviously boys have everything perfect, and because every problem that only women can fix.

MintPrince8219 Report

#60

I have far more body hair than I ever wanted.

Aezen Report

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#61

Nothing is really annoying, but whoever designed boxers I straight up want to fight them for making such an uncomfortable product

Wiz21Reddit Report