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It is no secret that a lot of us have hidden things from our parents at one point or another. Whether it was that one time you snuck out to a party you weren’t allowed to attend, or opened that box of chocolates you weren’t supposed to touch, it is very much inevitable that parents won’t know everything about what their children do. 

Someone online, in the r/AskMen subreddit, decided to ask men about the secrets they’ve hidden from their parents, and they delivered plenty. The question went viral, collecting 13.8k upvotes and prompting 5.4k comments. Scroll down for the whole list, consider upvoting the entries you found the most interesting and leave a comment!

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#1

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I got married and didn’t tell them until my wife began to show her pregnancy. We had been married for over a year at that point. They did not approve of our relationship because of outdated reasons. We have been married for 37 years now and have 4 kids and 7 grandkids

metalbill64 , Photos by Lanty Report

Final score:
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#2

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out My teenage best friend Chester was forbidden to come to our house or call, because they heard he was a bad kid, welp, the friend they liked Raphael, was Chester all along... Used his middle name for around 6 years until mom found out.

RedRaptorGod , Rodney Report

Final score:
441points
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#3

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out When I was a junior in high school, my mom and I got into a low speed accident with minor damage to both vehicles. Later that month I was so exhausted from school that I decided to ditch. I drove on the backroads for 10 minutes send parked, and then slept.

My mom found out and was furious at me. I lied and said that it was because I wasn't feeling good and I had headaches and some bs like that. She took me to the doctor and they found that my C3 vertebrae was fractured on top of having a tumor growing on it. I ended up having a gnarly 10 hour spinal surgery that honestly completely changed the course of my life.

And we only found out about it because I couldn't think of any other b******t excuse to use

RealSteelHrothgar88 , Bonnie Jeffs Report

Final score:
431points
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#4

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out My mom is not so good with finances and the internet. I have been paying a significant portion of her bills for the past decade and she has no idea.

comicsnerd , James Cridland Report

Final score:
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#5

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out My mom raised me in a pretty aggressive christian household. When we finally got tv, I discovered HBO had like a 5 minute preview of movies/shows whatever. Then I saw the late night s**t. Well our tv was locked down with a passcode. I had to be like 11 or 12 but I put a vhs in then hit record. I then told my mom that I wanted to watch a animal documentary but it was locked tv14 for the animal violence. Well, she had me turn around while she scrolled the password in. After she left for work, I rewinded the vhs and got the password. Sorry Mom!

pnut88 , Ya, saya inBaliTimur Report

Final score:
366points
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#6

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out While my parents were at work, my older brother started cooking french fries in a cast iron skillet and cranked the heat until the oil was boiling. He left the stove unattended for a few minutes and came back to a raging fire. He took the pan, spilled hot grease on the cheap kitchen tile, opened the sliding back door and tossed it into the yard before hosing it down. The microwave that sat above the stove was completely ruined and two or three floor tiles were badly burned. So my brother goes to Lowes and finds the exact microwave model, overcharging his card to pay for it. Comes home, tosses the old one, installs the new one. We replaced the tiles with a box cutter and super glue and exchanged the burned tiles in the middle of the kitchen with tiles from the back of the pantry. They never suspected a thing

GimmeSumGanja , Bruce Report

Final score:
328points
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#7

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I snuck out my window at night to raise hell in the neighborhood when I was a teenager. They brought it up in casual conversation about 20 years later..... yeah. Parents know.

Tato_tudo , HomeSpot HQ Report

Final score:
246points
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HarriMissesScotland
HarriMissesScotland
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I found out at my mother's funeral that she knew more about things I had done than I ever knew from the minister. My best friend's father.

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#8

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I got a tattoo on my shoulder blade. Kept it hidden for years after a shower etc. Found out years down the line my brother told them a week after I had the tattoo!

JTGoran , Shrie Bradford Spangler Report

Final score:
221points
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#9

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out There's a little entryway off on the side of my mother's house and into the basement. I realized how easy it was to sneak in and out of that thing when I was sixteen, and asked if I could move my room to the basement to "feel like I had my own space."

Actually, I snuck people in and out of it constantly. My girlfriend at the time stayed over two or three times a week, and I would sneak friends in constantly to drink and party with me. Either that or I'd sneak out on weekends and go party and hang out with people. My mother is a very very conservative Christian, and if she ever found out, she would lose her mind and probably disown me. I think about this sometimes.

itzykan , Micah Baldwin Report

Final score:
221points
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#10

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out When I was 14 I stole my dad’s MGB roadster and drove it for about an hour. When I got it home I washed it to cool it down so he wouldn’t notice it was warm, he appreciated the wash so much he took me for my 2nd serving of ice cream that day.

Pegasus8891 , Ruth Hartnup Report

Final score:
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#11

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I got my drivers license a few days after I turned 16 one summer. I told my mom and dad that a friend and I wanted to drive a 100 miles away to go help my friends grandpa with chores around his house because he was getting to old to do them on his own. My mom and dad thought that was a great idea and even offered their brand new car for us to use the week we would be gone.

Thing is, we didn’t go to my friends grandfathers house, we drove almost a 1000 miles (each way) to Las Vegas. After we had driven a few hundred miles we disconnected the speedometer (gear driven) so they wouldn’t know the real miles we racked up on their new car. Had the time of our life. We slept in the car and cleaned up at truck stops along the way. This was back in the mid 70’s and the strip wasn’t even part of Las Vegas yet. We managed to slip into a casino and put a few nickels in a slot machine right inside the door, but never got caught. It was a road trip that I’ll never forget. Parents never were the wiser.

wyoflyboy68 , billy kerr Report

Final score:
214points
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Cass Thompson
Cass Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents were way too smart for me to get away with something like this, or anything really. My mom seemed to know EVERYTHING I did/wanted to do/tried to do, etc lol Your parents have to either be extremely naive or they just know and let you do it anyway, for yall to "get away" with all this stuff lol

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#12

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out My mom used to take the power cord to my Xbox when I was grounded. My buddy’s Xbox stopped working so he gave me his power cord and I would hop on when they weren’t home or late at night.

Subject-Delta- , Phil Denton Report

Final score:
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Mikey Kliss
Mikey Kliss
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My stepdad would take my controllers away when I was grounded. I had backup controllers and a Gameboy he seemed to not know about. He still brags to people that taking games away caused me to do better in school when in reality it just taught be skills about being sneaky

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#13

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I personally don't want to get married or have kids. I just don't want to deal with the stress around raising another life in this world and failing at being the best father that I can be. I would rather be happy alone.

jasonvoorheessucks , Joe Shlabotnik Report

Final score:
212points
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#14

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I knew about her cancer for 6 months before she told me.

TobyExe2003 , Jo Naylor Report

Final score:
198points
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#15

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I still talk to the girl they forbade me from speaking to when I was 14

dead_trim_mcgee1 , きうこ Report

Final score:
185points
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#16

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out That it took me 7 years to get my B.S in CS. Because I failed a lot due to anxiety and depression. I'm a first Gen american so they dont know how college works and I just lied to them by saying that taking 2 or 3 classes a semester is better than being full time.

AmatureProgrammer , BigOakFlickr Report

Final score:
181points
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Huddo's sister
Huddo's sister
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not the time it takes but what you learn that's important.

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#17

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out The really great report card I brought home once was actually a fabrication I made on the home computer while they were sleeping. Mom was so proud, I never told her.

retroedd , Mrs. Gemstone Report

Final score:
165points
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Suz66
Suz66
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always had siblings go to the same school so I couldn't get away with it. I did, however change a D+ to a B+ on a quarterly report card and got away with it. I got a C by the semester report card and they were pissed that it "dropped from a B+!"

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#18

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I skipped school once in high school. Forged my dad's signature on a note. I'm 37 and still think my mom might kill me if she found out.

GWindborn , Jamie Buscemi's pics Report

Final score:
162points
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Monkey Spunk
Monkey Spunk
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to forge my mum's signature all the time, got caught once. When I was a teen (13ish) my mum wanted a loan without my dad knowing so got me to forge his signature on the loan forms.

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#19

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out That they are terrible at hiding things or making passwords. Anytime I was in trouble and used a password to lock the tv or computer they always used a significant date so it was just process of elimination.

I also found almost all of the Christmas presents every year because they would just put them in the garage under a giant blanket. Like all of a sudden in mid-December a mountain of stuff covered by a blanket would appear in the garage, don't have to be Sherlock Holmes to figure that one out.

todoslosfritos , Jeff Egnaczyk Report

Final score:
160points
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Julian McCallum
Julian McCallum
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know where the Christmas presents are kept, but I like the surprise on Christmas day

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#20

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I never graduated college. Im the youngest so they were pretty "over" going to graduation ceremonies. I said I got my degree in the mail. I still got a decent job, they never asked for my degree but I said I had one on my resume.

Been 8yrs since I "graduated"

AskMenModsSuck , Sophie Report

Final score:
142points
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Frances M
Frances M
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is so common. But be careful, my current job had me bring the real certificates in with me to the interview so they could photocopy them there and then and stamp the copies for proof to the interviewers.

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#21

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out Im the one that made all the leprechaun movies disappear throughout my childhood. I took them to granny’s house & made sure they’d never see the light of day again.

MisssJaynie , Bill Rand Report

Final score:
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#22

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I used to drive the family car when they were away at work. Like everytime. Just drive around the neighbourhood. I was 15.

serveyer , born1945 Report

Final score:
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#23

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out That I watched Ben 10. Growing up, I said that Ben 10 was stupid and then I watched an episode and loved it. But not wanting to be a hypocrite, I would put a sign on my door and say don’t come into until 10:30 which was what time Ben 10 ended on Saturday mornings.

Sebastian83100 , Anna Schwarz Report

Final score:
107points
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Grace Walker
Grace Walker
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am the same with My Little Pony. Sometimes stuff like this is still enjoyable even as a teenager

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#24

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out I once took my dads motorbike on a 4 hour round trip because I woke up late for a scuba diving trip when I was 18.

I was being picked up by the instructor and just overslept by about 45 min and didn't hear them at the door. My parents were away so I put on all my dads bike gear (we are pretty similar in size) and drove about two hours up the motorway and spent the day diving before driving home. Filled up the tank on the way home to cover my tracks!

I didn't have a license or insurance (although I could drive a bike).

I don't think he would even care now (I'm 33) but I've just never had the right moment to tell him.

each_peach_beach , PoYang_博仰 Report

Final score:
98points
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Debby Marengo
Debby Marengo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At a family dinner get together when you bring up all the things you did as a kid. [just to start trouble] lol

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#25

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out In high school, the melted floor mats in my mom's new car were because I sprayed febreeze on dog c**p that a friend's shoe brought in and it "reacted like that".

In truth, it was a firecracker that someone tried to chuck out the window and it bounced off the glass and landed inside the car. They forgot the child safety windows didn't go all the way down.

Gearsforbrains , Rob Cruickshank Report

Final score:
96points
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Huddo's sister
Huddo's sister
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is the first time I have heard of child safety windows. Now the reason old winder windows in the back seats of cars don't wind all the way makes sense.

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#26

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out Those 20 beers that were stashed under my bed..I was NOT holding them for a friend

scottybobotty1992 , frankieleon Report

Final score:
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NsG
NsG
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unless your parents also believe they've removed the word "gullible" from the dictionary, they knew the truth.

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#27

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out Back in high-school, we went on a family vacation to Hayward Wisconsin. Me, my brother, and my cousin had these under water fire crackers we'd been lighting and throwing in the lake. Well, I convinced my cousin to light one and throw it in the toilet of the cabin we rented. Sure enough, it cracked the bowl and all the water spilled out. When it came time to fess up, none of us had any idea what happened and my uncle had to go buy a new toilet to install. I think we told them the truth about a decade later.

seismatters , dirtyboxface Report

Final score:
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caedenpecaut avatar
Supa79 (He/him)
Supa79 (He/him)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bro. Don’t throw those into lakes, they’re like toxic and kill the fish and s**t.

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#28

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out That I was a bouncer for a night club for about a year and that I took a personal loan for my classes.

2oam , Håkan Dahlström Report

Final score:
76points
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#29

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out When I moved across the country 2 years ago my car broke down in the middle of Texas. I ditched it there and took a rental the rest of the way and bought a used car on Facebook 2 weeks later. They still think I’m driving the same car I had when I left.

NotProductiv , Nicolas Henderson Report

Final score:
76points
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rstone avatar
Bexx 🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦
Bexx 🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Weird thing to lie about if your car just broke down! I think there’s some missing details here

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#30

Men Online Share 30 Things They Kept To Themselves So Their Parents Would Never Find Out When I found out they were really Santa Claus.

justy805 , Cindy Shebley Report

Final score:
52points
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viviane_katz avatar
-
-
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

...played along for the next few decades. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CkrpvCs-kfE

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