Please tell me the musical was Cats

ITS JSCHLATT AND JAMBO (oops left caps on)

You sickle? We cure you.

Started off at $1 a kiss, then the cat copped an attitude

i do this when i get carsick

Must have gotten his Ancestry.com results back.

Correctile Disfunction.

He's heading for the jugular!!!

It's show time...what you got?

Is that kid armed?

Autocorrect is run by me

French bulldog: Le barque, n'est-ce pas?

Isn't that the X-Men logo?

Since people wear ties at the base of the neck and not the chin level, I'd say 2.

I'm waiting for my flame grilled grouper fillet. And make it snappy

Spiderbat was a failed Super Hero because he kept flying into his own web.

They're not bald tires. They're tread deficient.

I was lucky enough to get a. Partner last year and I have never been happier so if you are in a toxic relationship there is no way out (in my experience) so I know it's a cliche but there are more fish in the sea!

If Jesus wasn't crucified, he still would have died young due to poor nutritional choices.

so WILD

I mean when people steal you got to stop it

Great news! I'm not the one who gave you an STD!!

That was the last time I cover for you cocaine addiction *Husband* (she yelled so that everyone at the airport could hear).

But actually, that’s not very nice….

I would die of embarrassment. I have severe anxiety.

The child looks like he's just here for the trainwreck. He's thinking "dad is so gonna get it!"

Rotten thing to do! Lol

LOVE IT!!!

I would have walked by. Mean joke.

I don't think it's funny at all to do to someone who hates it. I wanted to laugh at first, i would cry laugh if someone I love made this sign, but some people are really truly embarrassed and this isn;t cool to humiliate someone you say you love

douchebag move.

It would be funnier if she wasn’t even coming back from prison

Congrats!

Naw I prefer my android because I can not charge my tablet because I couldn't find an adapter t Walmart so if my tablet dies I have to figure out how to play on my phone but at least it won't die during trips so one point for android

Yeah, doctors become contortionists on those stools.

So no one thought to get the cars out the way first?

And here I am at 6am having not even gone to sleep yet… XD

SpongeBob Scared Pants.

I've had the opposite of this on several occasions and, in a sudden access of panic, wondered what the hell I'd forgotten to pay.

"Okay, stop me if you've heard this one" ( but they never stop).

My mom learned to forge my grandma’s signature at, like, ten, and since they have the same initials, now they both have the same signature.

Yes

So on Valentine's Day, he plans to knock someone unconscious in order to get a date?

uncle Ian

If you EVER speak to me in Spanish, Te apuñalaré con tu propia columna vertebral!