People Who Had A Deal To Get Married To Their Friends If They Were Single By 30 Share What Happened
While it sounds like something out of a sitcom, there are people out there who, either for laughs or out of desperation, decided to create what is sometimes called a marriage pact. Simply put, the two parties agree that, if both are still single at 30, they might as well take a shot at marriage.
Well, one netizen wanted to hear how that turned out for the people online, so they asked internet users to share their tales. Romance, hilarity, and tragedy all feature, so get comfortable as you prepare to scroll and upvote your favorite stories. And if you have an active marriage pact, let us know how that went in the comments section below.
This post may include affiliate links.
This is actually my time to shine! I met “Lisa” when I was in high school through a mutual friend. Lisa lived about 4 hours but we kept in touch by writing letters (this was in the 1980s). We met-up for a spring break trip at the beach and got along well since we hadn’t seen each other in several years. We both went to different colleges and dated on and off some during our college years. After college we dated then she went to Germany for 3 years. We’d see each other casually when she’d come home but nothing serious.
When she came back home from Germany we started seeing each other again. We made a pact that if we were not married by 30 we’d get married. We drifted apart a bit at 29 years old and we were both dating other people. She ended up marrying the person she was dating and I ended up marrying the person I was dating. We both went to each other’s weddings with our respective SO’s.
We’d meet as couples and go to dinner sometimes and once vacationed together for a long weekend. Our kids went to the same school for awhile, too. Then we lost touch for about 5 years…until one day I ran into Lisa at a local Starbucks.
I heard someone call my name and it was Lisa! We hugged and caught up for a while. I then asked her how her husband was doing and she said they split up about a year ago. She asked about my wife and I told her we split about 10 months ago. We looked at each other and I asked her if she’d meet me for coffee the next day and she immediately said yes!
We dated for several years and got married in December 2021.
With us it was “if we are still single at 65 let’s just move in together - at least we like each other.” We met first year at university and had been close friends ever since.
She died of breast cancer at 63. Miss her every day.
She told me that 5 years ago. I said: why not just try dating now? We did. We're married now :D Why wait?
It’s unclear if the idea of a “marriage pact” was cooked up by some screenwriter or inspired by a true story, but regardless, it was probably popularized by the 1997 film “My Best Friend's Wedding.” No doubt, upon exiting the theater, a lot of half-serious pacts were made, although no doubt most are lost to time, as even the participants no longer remember them.
Now this act has popped up in the media so often that it has its own TV tropes page and even a rather ingenious dating service named after it. Marriage Pact is a matchmaking service that mostly focuses on American college campuses, where people are “matched” by filling out compatibility forms.
I'm marrying him in November! Well, marrying him to another woman....I'm their officiant :D
I kissed her this morning when I was leaving for work, we get married in 3 days. No joke, made the pact, reconnected in person after a few years on my 31st birthday which is 3 days before her 30th, we went out for a date and we haven’t spent a night apart since. And in 3 days we say the ol I Do’s.
Not me, but I have a former coworker that made that pact with his senior high school prom date. Lost touch for 7 or so years. Reconnected at the 10 year high school reunion. Got married 2 years later. Now 2 kids with a third on the way and VERY happy. It was cool to watch the majority of that story go down
Many of the stories here actually have a happy ending, although there is no doubt some positive self-selection. People who are friends as young adults, but take time to mature and figure out what they want might actually be very compatible partners later in life. This isn’t to say that dating one’s friends is always a good choice, far from it, but it makes sense that it would have a success rate higher than just attempting to connect to random strangers.
He has like 5-6 kids. He actually hit me up when we were 30 (were 32 now) and asked about the deal. I was like “dude don’t you have like 5 kids???” I was not gonna take on that circus
She’s a single mom now so I’m getting ready to strap my step dad boots on here shortly.
He's upstairs, I'm downstairs. We didn't get married but we did buy a house together, platonic like.
With the advent of the internet and, to a lesser extent, smartphones, people can both connect with old marriage pacts and also set reminders years in advance. That, and the popularity of threads like this, has possibly made this concept explode in popularity. Which in turn leads to more people developing marriage pacts.
Met my wife in 9th grade Spanish class. Walked her to her locker every day. Father gets arrested, I move away. She somehow gets contact info for me from a mutual friend and we keep in touch over the years. Married at 20. 13 years in November. We have 4 kids and life is... pretty sweet. Settled down in the same school district that we met in. Someday our kids may he in that same classroom. She's my best friend.
So well! I'm so proud of him. He's smashing his career goals and really setting up a life he loves. He's my best friend in this entire world. I don't think we'll get married ever-we've both grown into two very different people since we made that deal. But I just adore everything he's grown into !
In fact, once one accepts and reveals that a person could be a potential partner without any pressure at the moment, this idea, like a seed, can take root and develop. So it’s easier to reconnect. Other, common relationship pitfalls are also more easy to avoid, as the marriage pact already sets a goal for the couple, while also taking away the pressure or “risk” that one party has when it comes to initiating a relationship.
we didn't last long. got married at 25. Still going strong.
Made the deal at 23. Married at 25. Going on 13 years together.
My current bf told me that in high school when we were just friends that “we’re best friends and If i dont find a wife by 30, we’re getting married”. We decided just to date eachother 6 months later. Its been 7 years now together.
Of course, not all the stories are quite as happy. Life, among other things, happens to us all. Plus, some people might make a pact in desperation and simply do not move on with their lives. Instead of growing, they stagnate, relying on an oral agreement to attempt a relationship. Cases might differ, but most of us simply won’t find a person who is deeply stuck in the past attractive at all.
This actually did happen for a friend of mine and his wife.
But it was more of a conversation along the lines of "hey remember that pact we made when we were 18 about getting married at 30 if we were both single? Well we are now 30 and single, did you want to give dating a shot"?
5 years later and they are now happily married, I have no idea why they didnt give dating a shot years before, but thats none of my business.
He's divorced, depressed and addicted.
I had to block him because he was in the habit of making **many** late night calls when he drank, and he's now a full blown alcoholic. I advised therapy, he said beer was his therapy. Waking up to 40+ drunken text messages and 10+ missed calls is not really something I find palatable for a friendship, especially after setting boundaries. My husband never complained or made any comments, he just let me sort it out on my own.
Big oof. Good on the husband for letting her handle it the way she wanted.
Over COVID I saw her profile pop up on my switch, so I reached out to her and started catching up for the first time since I moved away for college. One thing lead to another, I asked her if she’d like to move up the timeline on our promise, and we plan to get married next fall at the nice young age of 26.
Been married 16 years. Together for 20. Longest 4 days away from him after we made the pact to meet in Paris. Still haven’t been to Paris but I have the love of my life.
He’s driving. We are pulling our camper. Our 9 year old is in the backseat. We just finished a 4 night camping trip with his younger brother and his fiancé (also a “if we’re single…” couple). They have two girls, 2 and 4. We are all still excellent friends. My bil and his fiancé dated right after high school. My husband and i didn’t hook up until 2 days before we eloped. Married 11 years yesterday. Friends since ‘94
"We are still excellent friends" says it all to me. Congratulations. You got it right.
We’re dating and happy as could be. We’re almost 30 now though so we’re going to have to break up to honor our marriage pact
We made the pact the first time we hung out, started dating a few months later, and are now married. He’s my soulmate!
We made the pact at 15 as a joke. We finished high school, college and moved into early adulthood while he dated other people. I was single until 23 when I met my match who I’m still with to this day.
This year he broke up with his girlfriend because he said he loved me and couldn’t be friends anymore because it was too hard for him.
It sucks but I wish him the best.
I married her sister. I never wanted to marry her, she was my friend and she thought of the “if we aren’t married by 30”, thing.
I do actually have a friend who did this. They reconnected after not seeing each other for a good while. They laughed and reminisced about their funny agreement to get married at 30 if they hadn't met someone else. They did get married pretty quick and were happy...for about a year. Then they spend a couple more years miserable together. Things got very bad and he ended up divorcing her. He's now happily married to someone who seems to be much better for him.
He’s unhappily married to someone else. Spends all his time gardening now.
Great! Married with two kids, living his best life. Our cut off was 28 and I was married by 21, he was married by 22.
So they did get married to each other? Because this story could mean they both made the pact but didn’t have to get married to each other, just married before 30
She’s been living a WILD life. We made the pact at 22, she got married by 24, divorced by 25, new relationship and got pregnant at 26, married at 28 and divorced at 30.
In that time she dropped out of college, went back to college, completed her associates, got nailed for a few drug charges and is currently fighting for custody of her kid with the dad.
She's married to my good friend. But things are rocky. I just got divorced so maybe we'll revisit this in our 40s? Just kidding.
I said 50 to one of my best friends. He said "uh, ok?" and it was settled. At 27 I married my other best friend and my plan e came to the wedding. He's very happy for us, and I guess he lucked out not having to marry a lesbian!
We were in the same master program and I just broke up with my boyfriend. My friend told both of us that we should have a pact to get married if we were both single by 30. We agreed. Then one year later, he came out to me. Now at 43, he's happily married and I'm happily single. I guess we both dodged a bullet.
I said 50 to one of my best friends. He said "uh, ok?" and it was settled. At 27 I married my other best friend and my plan e came to the wedding. He's very happy for us, and I guess he lucked out not having to marry a lesbian!
We were in the same master program and I just broke up with my boyfriend. My friend told both of us that we should have a pact to get married if we were both single by 30. We agreed. Then one year later, he came out to me. Now at 43, he's happily married and I'm happily single. I guess we both dodged a bullet.