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Welcome to the “Man Who Has It All,” a space that offers a safe place for men whose eyelashes are ruining their career, men who struggle to lose the baby weight, men who share tips on upping their eyebrow game, men who don’t want to appear too pushy so they just don’t apply for the job of their dreams, and men who do it all: juggle housework, life, good looks, PH balance and a job.

And while you question your own PH balance right now (feeling slightly acidic lately?), let me also tell you these are imaginative scenarios in an imaginative world where women rule. Because there’s just that much BS that women just have to suck it up and smile in this sexist society.

No wonder the “Man Who Has It All'' parody project gained a cult following online with almost 558k Facebook followers cringing over hilariously painful and absurdly realistic posts, tweets, memes and jokes. Fiercely ironic and somewhat revolutionary, this is a breath of fresh air in the world that’s soaked in air fresheners.

More info: Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Patreon.com

The Man Who Has It All is an anonymous parody persona, better known as a “working dad” who dishes out nuggets of advice on a daily basis for men like him. Imagine middle-aged men struggling to juggle a successful career, fatherhood, and smooth skin, and you realize you can’t.

That’s the deal—the online page subverts sexist double standards and makes this imaginary dad live in a world ruled by women. This is where real-life advice on how to be a perfect mum is turned upside down and targeted at men, who in real life are left floundering, enjoying their life, career, and whatever as a given.

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Leo Domitrix
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This... Rosalind Franklin, I'd give you the Nobel, posthumous rule be da*ned.

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While these nuggets of advice women are bombarded with daily may not seem like a big deal at first, they do indeed add up in the Man Who Has It All. It’s the sexist assumptions about women that basically say you need your husband’s reassurance to do things you want, you can’t follow your dreams if they get in the way of your family, for you, a family must come first, and then all the other things if you have any time left. All this nonsense has been draining women for years, and it still does.

No wonder the Man Who Has It All became an instant hit on social media. With 558k Facebook followers and 245.1K followers on Twitter, it has gained a loyal fanbase. So in order to find out more about this elusive dad persona and what his life is really like, Bored Panda reached out to the Man Who Has It All as he agreed for an interview in character. “Hi, I'm a busy working dad of three, media personality and he-preneur,” the Man introduced himself.

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Susie Elle
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because, as we all know, male authors write with their penises so it's only natural we differentiate them from normal, female authors who, in fact, use their hands (/sarcasm, love you Stephen King and Joe Abercrombie)

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“I got into social media when I realized there was so little out there for frazzled dads trying to juggle the school run, healthy packed lunches, dewy skin and never-ending legs. All types of men: working dads, Stay At Home Dads (SAHDs), doctors' husbands, childfree men and even crazy cat gentlemen benefit from my advice.”

For those who’re wondering what exactly the name “Man Who Has It All” means, the Man said that “it refers to men now being able to have it all—a career AND a baby, plus, if we're lucky, friends, hobbies, a beautiful home, cashmere knits, lazy suppers, a youthful glow and effortless party eats. Aren't we lucky?”

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Nathan Pogorzala
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do these dopes not realize this is all written in jest? Everyone is all butt hurt over some jokes highlighting double standards

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Susie Elle
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whenever I read 'smile with your eyes' I just imagine someone squinting really hard

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With so many following on social media, the Man has clearly built himself a name like no other. And it seems like he’s enjoying the time of his life. “I love it when people engage and share their own tips with me. For example, someone on Twitter said that if dad is feeling overwhelmed in the run up to Christmas, he could ask his dad to help, get up two hours earlier or simply take a few moments to breathe,” he said.

On the other hand, the Man said he doesn’t like the battle between the stay at home dads and working dads. “Men can be so catty,” he added.

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Jeremy Biggs
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So go to the office wearing dirty panties, smelly clothes and a complete bottle of perfume

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For those wondering what the Man has been up to lately, the dad has been pretty busy. “I've been getting my fab little t-shirt shop ready for Christmas and working on some new posts for next year. I've also been coming up with new debate topics to engage my fans.”

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PenitentEyeball
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Looks like Jacob doesn’t understand satire… still no reason to downvote them, they are right…

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The Man also assured us that we’d be surprised how political men can be. “For example, should working dads go part-time? How old is too old to wear shorts? Are you layering your products in the right order? And, my most controversial debate, can men be funny?”

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Lauren Caswell
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Secretly, I'd love to 'name' a few more, but that is enough to make the point. Did you know about marginalia? Drawings in the margins. There are hilarious medieval ones! Enjoy the rest of the posts🙂

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Lauren Caswell
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

(/s)Men are just better at nurturing though. And anyway it's always been a masculine trait, being a good husband and taking care of the home and family. It's part of the bible. It's an easy life, why are they complaining (/S!)

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ZAPanda
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well look, I mean if his dad doesn't help out, what's he going to do with his time? I mean he has to earn his keep. He just sits around all day knitting and reading the newspaper. I mean the least he can do is help his son clean the house.

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Eric G
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men who wear tank tops, tight shirts or shorts are just asking for it. It's their fault for being sexually assaulted. Dress moderately, not like a gigolo. After all, girls will be girls.

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Lyone Fein
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What nonsense. Walk into any room. Look around. It is pretty easy to see whether there are dishes in the sink, if the cat litter needs scooping, if there is clutter on the couch table chairs floor, etc. And always just clean up after yourself in the kitchen and bathroom.

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Jyri Hakola
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Try to be an intelligent boy in the average middle school class and find the irony of the text.

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Karin Jansen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I asked my mother in law for her son's hand in marriage. I felt so lucky as he walked down the aisle towards me in his white suit, worn to indicate virginity and purity. For our first dance, they officially announced us as 'misses and mister Claire Jones', for the first time. Lovely" Claire, CEO

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Amy Pattie
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve used “bro” as a gender neutral term, but the one time I use “sis” it was offensive

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René Studer
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I‘ve actually been told multiple times as a guy that I should smile more. I would be more attractive that way.

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Amy Pattie
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Claire’s too busy picturing Liam in his gym shorts to hear what he says anyway

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Shanaaia
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Helping in the household" is discriminating, anyway. Should be "working together"

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Jes
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband genuinely proposed this as he doesn't enjoy his job at all. Now I feel silly for refusing

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Jacob Nunez
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2 years ago

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If an idea doesn’t make sense then it needs an explanation…..no matter the gender

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Jacob Nunez
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You don’t run like anything….you just run……no matter how fast……no matter how slow

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Snorkeldorf
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Friend went to a Holiday party with her hubby. Her hubby worked for the city and the city employees had the party at the same hotel each year. Friend didn't initially want dessert, but changed her mind when they announced last call for the dessert table. On the way, she slipped on a pat of butter someone dropped. Hurt her knee and smashed her face on the floor. Nose was bleeding. Young man came up and gave her instructions to stop the bleeding. Young woman came up and gave her slightly different instructions. Young man said "Lady, I'm a paramedic". Young woman said "and I'm a doctor". Turned out she was married to one of the paramedics.

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PandaGoPanda
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think my husband genuinely believes this one. Or else that the Wrapping Fairy exists.

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Karin Jansen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You should ask how he juggles being a musician AND a father. Doesn't playing music take time away from his kids? Doesn't he feel guilty?

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Sky Render
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a question we actually should be asking, I feel. Anger, hate, rage, and jealousy are all emotions, and I see an awful lot of all of them coming from male politicians...

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Jyri Hakola
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In many countries with long culinaristic traditions the first opinion is not even a joke..

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Jes
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2 years ago

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That's just stupid. The word 'table' has the word 'able' in it. Do you simply use table for both meanings? Check the spelling.....

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Ryan Deschanel
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is problematic only when there is an "only" at the end of the sentence, because it would imply discrimination.

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Eric G
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If men wear tank tops and shorts, their just asking for it. They should be covering up.

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elSti
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2 years ago

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well you could go with dr Jacobs. But then again her claim to fame is being married to president Biden. so it wouldn't really work if you changed it to Jacobs and it doesn't really work for this purpose if you call her dr Biden.

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Amy Pattie
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So many “influencers” are like this… but of course it’s doomed to fail so you better buy their products!

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Scagsy
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Stay in your lane. It's actually courteous to hold the door for another person. An act borne of nothing more than good manners.

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Jes
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But don't be a househusband otherwise other men will tell you it's wrong ;)

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Jes
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unfortunately this is how magazines portray women and make us feel less than our worth

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Jacob Nunez
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This statement doesn’t make any sense……just treat them like human beings….like how we and you should be treated

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Stefan
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I swear I didn't write it ! Stefan, spokeperson.

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Jes
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In UK (and outside) they have this term called 'positive discrimination'. Basically, it means you can overlook a better candidate due to the need of having a diverse workplace. So it now genuinely means that if you work hard you still mY not get the rewards you deserve. I mean the term has 'discrimination' in it lol. Imagine explaining to a kid that when you grow up you won't be employed based on how good you are but based on what diversity needs a company has. I am always arguing against this and believe a fairer employment process (that identifies the best person for the job) would be better than just employing someone because you need more of certain types of people...

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Snorkeldorf
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you were my mom, you'd completely forget the stockings, wait till the last minute when they were out of everything so you never got the one thing you asked Santa for. Always loved her but holidays weren't her thing. She worked full time when everybody else was a stay-at-home mom. Dad worked too and finally got the one thing I asked for one year. I always knew dad bought it.

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