That is one very jealous woman. The crying shame is that all that focus and energy, directed elsewhere could make her a superfit gym bunny, or master baker, or superfit gym bunny who bakes, or so many other things so that she would have absolutely no need to be jealous.

I'd fear anyone capable of putting so much time and energy to hurt someone.

This woman should be in jail.

"Here's a story where my wife is a monster, but don't call her a monster." mmkay

It really shouldn’t be about the money. It’s not ‘his’, it’s theirs: they were building a life together. Aside from that, this woman really really needs a lot of help. Why won’t OP put his foot down in terms of therapy? If she doesn’t want it: fine, get ready to go it alone. It feels like OP wants the sympathy but without seeing the reality of the situation.

Holy Jesus. That woman is a monster and her husband isn't much better for standing behind her and infantilizing her. She didn't mean it? She didn't mean to stalk this woman for months on end, terrorizing her and harassing her into depression? Honestly, OP himself doesn't sound like he thinks her doing this is a big deal, it sounds like he's *only* mad over the money... not that she'd do the exact same thing to him if he wronged her. He should get a divorce, but he thinks she did nothing wrong. Scary that people like these two exist in reality. (Though who's reality is still up for debate...) Of all the things to choose to be... why choose to be this?

I won't call your wife a name. I will say that she has displayed no remorse for trying to destroy this woman's life at a very vulnerable time. She made a determined effort to slander her, slander her morals to bring into question her the parentage of her innocent child. This while damaging the trust of her husband. Then you mention she still believes she was on a righteous mission, ZERO REMORSE She literally doubled down. She has done this out of a sense of being self-centered and jealous over everything this ex friend has that she doesn't. You must be a huge disappointment as well. Sorry. She does need help of some sort if she doesn't have a personality type that has no conscience.

Man this guy has his head in the sand, he's totally "drank the Koolaid". He's married to a psychopath! What if Laura had lost the baby due to all the stress of the nightmare his heinous wife created? He'd be married to a murderer ffs and she probably still wouldn't care. She needs to be in jail.

Your wife is a psychopath. Just run. Get rid of her as fast as you can. First, block all your social media accounts, emails, important documents, because she'll do it again. Whatever amount she paid, it should have been much more. She should have ended up in jail for several years, because she is a seriously dangerous POS. There's nothing worth saving in that marriage.

Divorce. Disavow. Disconnect.

Everytime I see some bad people on the news, I always wonder why their partners/families/friends won't readily denounce them. I'm not going to judge partners/families/friends for what the bad people did, but I am going to judge them if after all is known they still stick with their bad people. I'm going to consider them the same guilt as the bad people. Have some moral, people.

Jesus thats a lot

I am not making any derogatory comments about this man's wife, but I know that a woman like that is better lost than found and that he has no idea who he married.

To quote a Monty Python file: "Run away! RUN AWAY!!" She's in her 30's and spent more than a year torturing a woman that offended her in high school? By failing a "friendship test"?? Dude, this woman is batshit crazy. She was crazy in high school and she's even crazier now. And she still doesn't think she did anything wrong? This will not end well for you.

Dude never really knew his wife. If he's smart, he will divorce the crazy lady and walk away. Even starting over with nothing is better than wondering what fresh dumpster fire insanity she will pull next. She probably needs a new jacket and time in a padded room.

She’s a psycho and a terrorist. She should be locked up.

There's something very strange about this man saying he loves his wife and feels sorry for her, but he's just outed her in a hugely public way. People may not know her name. but they know, in detail, the awful thing he she's done. His question "am I right to be resentful, is disingenuous. He seems to be looking for a wave of permission to leave her. When he does, he should my close track of all his social media, etc.

She has shown absolutely no remorse, she refuses to get help from therapy, because she has no remorse for her actions, she probably feels the community service is unfair, because no remorse. There is no help for this woman because she doesn't accept responsibility, she's been petty and jealous before, that is a red flag, but the extent she went to, that actually fits a psychopathic personality Dude needs to get a restraining order and then file for divorce, and the guilty judgment can be used as reason for the restraining order. I hope he stops being her doormat.

This all sounds like it's going to end up in a psychology textbook in the future.

The min requirement for him to stay in the marriage should be she agrees to therapy. If she can't get to the point where she feels regret for her actions by a date he decides, he should end it. Even if Laura wa exactly the person his wife thinks she is, her actions were unjustifiable.

Your wife is the textbook definition of psychotic. She did things she knew could destroy someone's career, marriage and reputation, and this was someone she was friends with at one time. She started it with "Matt" and telling her she failed the "loyalty test." Then, she goes mental trying to destroy this woman. Deliberately saying things to damage her career, marriage and reputation. She should have been thrown under the jail for these things. She's also very lucky that nothing was wrong with the baby due to the undue stress she caused. Please, please I'm begging you just divorce her and move on with your life. You or anyone you care about could be her next victim. If you divorce her and she can't pay what she owes and goes to jail, that's the best place for her.

This one is ripe for a gender reversal

From a personal standpoint, I think this resentment will eat away at your soul all the time you have contact with the source. You are between a rock ( your wife’s actions) and a hard place (guilt that you are not supporting her) . For your own salvation, you need to leave the situation,, you need to feel that you can support at a distance , with minimal emotional attachment.

You are completely delusional, OP. Your wife is ABSOLUTELY a psychopath. She needs intensive mental health treatment. I'm not sure I would stay with my husband if he pulled something so BATSHIT F*CKING CRAZY. Dude, she is beyond sick. Get the f*cking memo.

I think she needs to be committed. Unless he wants to keep her and be her guard for the rest of their lives. This went on over a huge amount of time and never once did she seem to see what she was doing and attempt to stop.

Get out now!

YEs, it certainly is justified. I really do not think there is any hope of her changing for the better. I think she will get worse and will end up in jail someday.

He may not think she is a psychopath, but I do!

He said he believes she genuinely thought she was exposing a bad person? No. All the stuff she made up because she was jealous is NOT that. She needs therapy and she doesn't want to go because she doesn't want to fully admit how wrong she was, and he is just as bad, trying to excuse her actions. He needs therapy so he can open his eyes to the lies he's telling himself. Once he does, I think the realization would help him get things straight in his life. And he should leave her!

It shouldn't be entirely left up to OP'S wife to decide whether or not to get therapy. OP should make it a condition of staying together, and not an option. Otherwise, she'll NEVER get therapy. She will keep recycling those same old excuses, while not showing a speck of remorse for her behavior. She may even try to "even the score" with Laura and escalate the situation by trying to run her down in a crosswalk, kidnapping her child, or torching her home. All the while, it could be OP'S neck on the chopping block. His wife needs to be living elsewhere, at least until her community service ends. In a blink of an eye, she could easily change from psychotic to psychopathic.

Since the original post was from more than 5 years ago, any help getting an update?

Yes, run far and fast. But to answer his question: "help me convince her to get therapy" Easy. "Get, and stay in, therapy or we are done.... I will not be married to or even associated with someone who can act like that so you need to work out whatever took you down that path and grow into the person I believe you to be." Honestly though, it's all but certain that he started seeing her true self reflected in her current and past actions, things he probably glossed over, or saw with a different lens before. Especially if she kept refusing therapy and any willingness to admit she is wrong and has remorse. Instead of a bang (immediate divorce), I get the feeling he slowly accepted it over time (it can be hard accept that a person is not at all who we thought they were, we fight it). And he drifted further away, leaving the relationship in a fizzle a few years later. ... And then she stalked and k*lled him. Wish there was an update; I'll keep my eye on the true crime shows.

How the hell can he still say he loves someone who is so sick and twisted?

As a person born of the millennial age I can somewhat understand the creeping of the socials, but Jesus Christ, this woman went well beyond that. Her behaviour is very unhinged and refusing therapy because “they will gang up” on her testifies to that and also shows that she KNOWS she is in the wrong. She needs help. Jealousy is an evil thing, much like an addiction, and it consumed her.

You bloody f*****g a******s!!! You censor D***S in order to not disturb your advertisers. And then I See ads from the AfD!!!!! Have you lost your f*****g mindestens, BP! That is a Nazi-Party in Germany!!!! And you have their ads, which say "deport, deport, deport" and other racist c**p, on this site?!?! Wtf is wrong with you????

I pity the OP, can a person sleep with one eye open?