Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

Share this article:

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Man Teaches Entitled Mom A Lesson That Having Kids Doesn’t Automatically Grant Her PTO Whenever

Man Teaches Entitled Mom A Lesson That Having Kids Doesn’t Automatically Grant Her PTO Whenever

ADVERTISEMENT

There’s no question that being a working parent is difficult. Juggling your children’s school and extracurricular schedules with deadlines at work while trying to maintain a strong relationship with your partner can be overwhelming. But the truth is, even people who don’t have kids can still be extremely busy and are equally entitled to time off from work.

One man recently reached out to Reddit detailing how he was pressured to swap vacation days with a colleague because she’s a parent and he’s not. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as some of the replies invested readers shared.

RELATED:

    This man was thrilled about the trip that he booked months ago

    Image credits: Sora Shimazaki / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    But now, he’s facing immense pressure to swap vacation days with a colleague just because she has children

    Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: ZooterBobSquareCock

    Image credits: Yan Krukau / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    74% of employees believe that parents are treated better than childfree adults in the workplace

    Despite all of the talk about declining birth rates that we’ve heard in recent years, having children is still the norm in a lot of places. A Gallup report from 2023 found that 69% of adults in the United States had kids, and 15% didn’t have any yet but planned to in the future. In fact, only 8% of adults had no interest in ever becoming parents. 

    And when it comes to raising kids nowadays, it is important for parents to have ample support. We all know “it takes a village,” which means moms and dads shouldn’t be expected to do it alone. Parents deserve to have access to paid maternity and paternity leave, affordable childcare, reasonable medical bills, etc. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that parents should be the only ones getting support.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Because it’s still not the norm to be childfree, many adults without kids report feeling overlooked and undervalued in many aspects of their lives. And one place where this is particularly prevalent is at work

    A survey from ResumeLab found that a whopping 72% of employees have noticed childfree workers being treated unfairly simply because they don’t have kids. And 74% of workers believe that parents are treated better in the workplace than childfree adults.

    Some examples of this include being denied time off, which 63% of childfree workers have experienced, and being required to work overtime, which over two thirds of childfree workers have experienced. 70% of workers without kids also say they’ve been given a greater workload than their colleagues that are parents at least once. And 85% of survey respondents said parents get priority when planning vacation days. 

    Image credits: Mateusz Dach / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    Everyone is entitled to vacation days, whether they have kids or not

    This often happens because employers assume that it’s not a big deal if people who aren’t parents have to stay late or move their vacation days, because they don’t have children waiting for them at home. And why would they need specific days off if they don’t have to plan around their children’s schedules? This issue is particularly prevalent when it comes to holidays, as parents are rarely forced to work on Christmas yet childfree employees are usually expected to. 

    ADVERTISEMENT

    But everyone is entitled to time off from work, and it’s unfair to deny anyone days off, whether they are requesting them to hang out with their kids or relax on the couch with their cat. Everyday Health notes that taking vacations can be crucial for employees’ physical and mental health.

    Taking time off might lower your risk of heart disease, reduce stress and anxiety, reduce depression, improve productivity and increase your overall life satisfaction. 

    One study even found that a vacation lasting only four or five days had a positive impact on participants’ self-reported health and wellness after they returned home, especially when they were completely detached from work during that time. Meanwhile, those who still did some work during their vacation reported worse health and wellness after their trip. 

    We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this man was right to stand his ground and refuse to move his vacation? Feel free to weigh in. Then, you can find another Bored Panda article discussing similar workplace drama right here

    Many readers took the author’s side, assuring him that he’s under no obligation to change his plans

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    However, a small minority didn’t like how he handled the situation

    Ic_polls

    Poll Question

    How do you feel about Lisa's reaction to her coworker's refusal to swap vacation dates?

    Understandable, she's under pressure as a parent.

    Overreacting, as she should have planned earlier.

    It's a normal workplace conflict, nothing unusual.

    She should have communicated better.

    Share on Facebook
    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Read less »
    Adelaide Ross

    Adelaide Ross

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about three years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    Read less »

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    What do you think ?
    Add photo comments
    POST
    Lady Eowyn
    Community Member
    19 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTAs are at it again! Whoa, big surprise there. OP wasn't in the least bit rude. At my last job I was asked to come in on a Saturday to take care of some things because "you don't have a family." No, I have neither husband no kids. I do have a mom I spent a lot of time with. I do have things I do for fun and relaxation. I did not come in.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    19 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For crying out loud! If you have kids, they are YOUR kids and YOUR responsibility, not anyone else's. If you feel you have to mention that having kids is hard, then why did you have them? Having kids is hard if you don't plan accordingly. Your lack of planning doesn't constitute an obligation on my part. It doesn't take a village: it takes two parents who take responsibility for a situation they chose to be in

    Ms.GB
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, I've known plenty of single parents who plan better than Lisa. You have to plan ahead especially as a single parent. Who was going to watch her children during that school break? Oh nobody...because she didn't plan ahead and now she's gotta scramble and convince someone else it's their problem?

    Ms.GB
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe Lisa should have checked the school calendar at the beginning of the year. It's not like they just spring a school break on you. She had as much of an opportunity to request that time off as he did. I wonder what she'd say if he told her she could have it as long as she reimburses him for those non refundable tickets. Is he supposed to lose thousands of dollars because she didn't think ahead?

    Nils Skirnir
    Community Member
    18 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ask her to pay for all your vacation costs and then maybe you’ll think about it.

    on second thought....
    Community Member
    18 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "you don't understand what it's like to raise kids" HAH!!! Well mam, YOU don't seem to understand that your kids are YOUR responsibility and your lack of planning is as well. Gosh, childless me had similar discussions so often with colleagues and the entitlement always baffled me. I'm so glad I'm retired now and don't have to deal with this anymore...

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    F**k off YTAs - her kids, her problem. "Must be nice" - yes, it jolly well is which is why we do not have kids. To have the flexibility. We put the FLEX in flexibility, in fact.

    Donna Peluda
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same happened to me in a job..I always accommodate for the workers with children. Sickness, doctors Holidays Xmas New year. I ate up all the bad shifts. One time my GF flew in from Italy as a suprise for my Birthday. I needed one shift changed from a week day to a Saturday and then all refused with petty excuses. Not smart on their part because I did the shift rota. Learnt my lesson.

    Secret Squirrel
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Getting the cold shoulder from her sounds like the absolute best case scenario. But let her know that she can be more organised and book time off earlier. School calendars aren't a last minute surprise.

    Stckynote
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    say it with me: YOUR LIFE CHOICES HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH ME! im so happy for you that you decided to bear children why are you trying to make it MY problem?

    Dragons Exist
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When did "be more understanding" become "do what they want you to do"

    KYLE
    Community Member
    14 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In this case he had NO flexibility. He booked a trip and couldn't change it. He gets his vacation and he no longer has to engage with her. Win-Win in my book.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

    sweet emotion
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that "cold shoulder" is in ANY way affecting your work or team morale, you immediately email manager and an HR rep with all details. Period. Temper tantrums in the workplace should not be tolerated.

    Mir Adwari
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hear hear. She asked, he said no. End of. Sulking about it is petty, childish and won't change a thing. He even said sorry and explained why and it wasn't until she got snotty with him that he pointed out that his time is no less valuable, so the YTAs can get in the bin! He doesn't have to be understanding - it's literally nothing to do with him whatsoever. Her mistake not to put in for time-off the minute the school publishes the holiday dates.

    nm (he/him)
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For 20 years I was splitting my vacation days in 2 groups: last 15 days of March and first 15 days of September. Thus I was avoiding conflict with a colleague, avoiding the crowds and obtaining better prices. Only once the pic in the office asked me to change this, to accommodate another colleague. I replied with just a hard look and she left me alone.

    Kristen Woehlke
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You don't know what it's like to be a parent"?!?!? Thank the gods! Because if I acted like her or the YTA trolls I'd think back and say "someone please kick my a*s because I am being so very unreasonable! Just because I don't have kids, it doesn't mean I'm wasting my time. OP has legit reasons to go on a vacation and lady let me tell you, your kids mean absolutely squat!

    Glen Ellyn
    Community Member
    Premium
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wouldn't even THINK of asking this of a coworker!

    Vinnie
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm blessed with great colleagues. Some have kids, some don't, nobody b*tches.

    tori Ohno
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm tired of parents arguing that they're more important than others because they have kids. Personally, I'm more important because I'm smart enough to use contraception, and my mother who wants me to visit her, is a shining star compared to your offspring.

    Big Chungus
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate that argument that people without kids are not as important. I a have a kid and like a responsible adult knew what I was signing up for. If I forget something time wise, it is my fault and no one else's. I have to eat the consequences of my stupidity. My time is no more valuable than any one else's.

    Janissary35680
    Community Member
    Premium
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP made a tactical mistake by saying he doesn't *want* to change his plans. That left a door open for further "negotiation" and the co-worker attempted to go through it.

    Curious Panda
    Community Member
    5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In my country we say "nadie te mandó" meaning "No one forced you", meaning, the guy didn't force her to get married and have a bunch of children, meaning is not the guy's fault she's tied down for time.

    brittany
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as a mom of 3 kids, my time off is in no way more valuable than any one else. if i don't get the time off, tough. that's life. entitled people with kids need to grow up

    Scott Rackley
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't have children. Yet my taxes help pay for your children's education. You're already one up on me, don't ask for more.

    Wharfrat
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people in stories on this site seem to miss the point that if you choose to have kids (a) your life will change and (b) they are your problem, no-one elses. Deal with it or use a c****m (or blow job or take it up the a**e, whatever).

    Ashlie Benson
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how people think if you don't have kids you just have loads of free time and zero responsibility.

    Asdf
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You don't know what its like to raise kids!" Yes exactly, that's the point d*****s. Boohoo for your life choices

    Stephen Lyford
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone else's planning failure is NOT my emergency. NTA, all day long.

    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine."

    Lady Eowyn
    Community Member
    19 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTAs are at it again! Whoa, big surprise there. OP wasn't in the least bit rude. At my last job I was asked to come in on a Saturday to take care of some things because "you don't have a family." No, I have neither husband no kids. I do have a mom I spent a lot of time with. I do have things I do for fun and relaxation. I did not come in.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    19 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For crying out loud! If you have kids, they are YOUR kids and YOUR responsibility, not anyone else's. If you feel you have to mention that having kids is hard, then why did you have them? Having kids is hard if you don't plan accordingly. Your lack of planning doesn't constitute an obligation on my part. It doesn't take a village: it takes two parents who take responsibility for a situation they chose to be in

    Ms.GB
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, I've known plenty of single parents who plan better than Lisa. You have to plan ahead especially as a single parent. Who was going to watch her children during that school break? Oh nobody...because she didn't plan ahead and now she's gotta scramble and convince someone else it's their problem?

    Ms.GB
    Community Member
    12 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe Lisa should have checked the school calendar at the beginning of the year. It's not like they just spring a school break on you. She had as much of an opportunity to request that time off as he did. I wonder what she'd say if he told her she could have it as long as she reimburses him for those non refundable tickets. Is he supposed to lose thousands of dollars because she didn't think ahead?

    Nils Skirnir
    Community Member
    18 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ask her to pay for all your vacation costs and then maybe you’ll think about it.

    on second thought....
    Community Member
    18 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "you don't understand what it's like to raise kids" HAH!!! Well mam, YOU don't seem to understand that your kids are YOUR responsibility and your lack of planning is as well. Gosh, childless me had similar discussions so often with colleagues and the entitlement always baffled me. I'm so glad I'm retired now and don't have to deal with this anymore...

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    F**k off YTAs - her kids, her problem. "Must be nice" - yes, it jolly well is which is why we do not have kids. To have the flexibility. We put the FLEX in flexibility, in fact.

    Donna Peluda
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same happened to me in a job..I always accommodate for the workers with children. Sickness, doctors Holidays Xmas New year. I ate up all the bad shifts. One time my GF flew in from Italy as a suprise for my Birthday. I needed one shift changed from a week day to a Saturday and then all refused with petty excuses. Not smart on their part because I did the shift rota. Learnt my lesson.

    Secret Squirrel
    Community Member
    17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Getting the cold shoulder from her sounds like the absolute best case scenario. But let her know that she can be more organised and book time off earlier. School calendars aren't a last minute surprise.

    Stckynote
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    say it with me: YOUR LIFE CHOICES HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH ME! im so happy for you that you decided to bear children why are you trying to make it MY problem?

    Dragons Exist
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When did "be more understanding" become "do what they want you to do"

    KYLE
    Community Member
    14 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In this case he had NO flexibility. He booked a trip and couldn't change it. He gets his vacation and he no longer has to engage with her. Win-Win in my book.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    15 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

    sweet emotion
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that "cold shoulder" is in ANY way affecting your work or team morale, you immediately email manager and an HR rep with all details. Period. Temper tantrums in the workplace should not be tolerated.

    Mir Adwari
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hear hear. She asked, he said no. End of. Sulking about it is petty, childish and won't change a thing. He even said sorry and explained why and it wasn't until she got snotty with him that he pointed out that his time is no less valuable, so the YTAs can get in the bin! He doesn't have to be understanding - it's literally nothing to do with him whatsoever. Her mistake not to put in for time-off the minute the school publishes the holiday dates.

    nm (he/him)
    Community Member
    16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For 20 years I was splitting my vacation days in 2 groups: last 15 days of March and first 15 days of September. Thus I was avoiding conflict with a colleague, avoiding the crowds and obtaining better prices. Only once the pic in the office asked me to change this, to accommodate another colleague. I replied with just a hard look and she left me alone.

    Kristen Woehlke
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You don't know what it's like to be a parent"?!?!? Thank the gods! Because if I acted like her or the YTA trolls I'd think back and say "someone please kick my a*s because I am being so very unreasonable! Just because I don't have kids, it doesn't mean I'm wasting my time. OP has legit reasons to go on a vacation and lady let me tell you, your kids mean absolutely squat!

    Glen Ellyn
    Community Member
    Premium
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wouldn't even THINK of asking this of a coworker!

    Vinnie
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm blessed with great colleagues. Some have kids, some don't, nobody b*tches.

    tori Ohno
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm tired of parents arguing that they're more important than others because they have kids. Personally, I'm more important because I'm smart enough to use contraception, and my mother who wants me to visit her, is a shining star compared to your offspring.

    Big Chungus
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate that argument that people without kids are not as important. I a have a kid and like a responsible adult knew what I was signing up for. If I forget something time wise, it is my fault and no one else's. I have to eat the consequences of my stupidity. My time is no more valuable than any one else's.

    Janissary35680
    Community Member
    Premium
    14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP made a tactical mistake by saying he doesn't *want* to change his plans. That left a door open for further "negotiation" and the co-worker attempted to go through it.

    Curious Panda
    Community Member
    5 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In my country we say "nadie te mandó" meaning "No one forced you", meaning, the guy didn't force her to get married and have a bunch of children, meaning is not the guy's fault she's tied down for time.

    brittany
    Community Member
    6 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as a mom of 3 kids, my time off is in no way more valuable than any one else. if i don't get the time off, tough. that's life. entitled people with kids need to grow up

    Scott Rackley
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't have children. Yet my taxes help pay for your children's education. You're already one up on me, don't ask for more.

    Wharfrat
    Community Member
    9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people in stories on this site seem to miss the point that if you choose to have kids (a) your life will change and (b) they are your problem, no-one elses. Deal with it or use a c****m (or blow job or take it up the a**e, whatever).

    Ashlie Benson
    Community Member
    12 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how people think if you don't have kids you just have loads of free time and zero responsibility.

    Asdf
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You don't know what its like to raise kids!" Yes exactly, that's the point d*****s. Boohoo for your life choices

    Stephen Lyford
    Community Member
    13 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone else's planning failure is NOT my emergency. NTA, all day long.

    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine."

    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Related on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda