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30 Crazy Yet Hilarious “I Looked Away For One Second” Stories Shared By Parents Online
Becoming a parent is like instantly gaining 37 levels in a role-playing game—some acquire superhuman reflexes for whenever your kid decides it’s time to tumble down the sofa, while others get that perk where you don’t need a ‘long rest’ for days because you divide up your sleep into naps to coincide with the kid’s sleep schedule.
However, even heroes can err, and sometimes—just sometimes—there is a moment when we turn away for one gosh darn second and our kid is already gone like Copperfield vanishes from his glass boxes.
A netizen by the nickname of u/blamingpig456 asked parents of Reddit to share their I looked away for ONE second stories, which prompted nearly 10,000 comments and brought in over 42,500 upvotes and 180 plus Reddit awards.
We’ve collected the best stories from the viral post to create a curated list that you can find below. Scroll down to learn what the little critters ended up doing during that moment of complete freedom from their parents, and why not vote and comment on the stories you enjoyed the most!
More Info: Reddit
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#1
I swear babies that can't even flip over yet can teleport short distances when no one is observing them. You put that thing down in one spot, turn your back on it for one second and then it's moved a few feet away.
They can do this because they don't understand how it's impossible. When babies learn enough about physics and object permanence to be able to move and navigate they lose the ability to teleport, because then they know enough to figure out it can't be done.
RELATED:
#2
My son was 3. We were leaving Target. He left my sight as I was adjusting my bags. Maybe two seconds, tops. Poof. He was gone. I try to act cool , but my true crime podcast obsession got the best of me. The store locks down. We are all looking for him. People are checking cars outside. I’m calling my son’s name louder than any intercom system. We were just about to call police.
And then my toddler slides out of the cart area and acts like,”’Sup?” He decided it would be a most excellent idea to shimmy underneath the carts and sit there as the world turns inside out searching for him.
I hugged him and yelled at him for a good 10 minutes, ugly sobbing.
100/100 grateful for my Target folks. We catered lunch for them as a huge thank you and sorry my kid is an a-hole.
Emerald Ocean 2 years ago
I misread it and thought the kid came zooming by ON THE CART yelling Sup. I was laughing so hard. LOL
#3
When I was a kid my mom was watching me play while hanging laundry. When she turned to hang a garment I discovered a “bouncy spot” in the grass and fell down a 100ish year old abandoned well. She said that day took years off her life.
#4
We moved into our new house on Halloween in 2001. Most of the heavy lifting was done, so the wife decided to begin unpacking the important stuff and I would take our 8 year old daughter out trick or treating. We stepped outside and I realized I left my phone.
Standing on the front porch I tell her..."Don't move, I have to get my phone. I'll be right back. Do not move."
Narrator: She moved.
New neighborhood. Kids and parents everywhere. I'm running up and down the street frantically and after about 15 minutes later I spot a family, mom and dad and a handful of rugrats...with mine in tow.
They had a good laugh telling me they just turned around and there she was, having appeared out of nowhere. Decided to stay close assuming some hysterical parent would eventually come running.
Henry Russell 2 years ago
the same thing happened when my little sister who was like four walked out door and thankfully was found by a group of teenagers when my mom found her
#5
I glanced at the salt, and toddler daughter grabbed a whole new potato off my plate and shoved it in her mouth. She then tried to swallow it and choked. Longest 15 seconds on my life getting it out of her. Learn child first aid people! They are suicide machines as toddlers.
#6
It was 23 years ago, but still fresh in my mind.
I looked in my rearview mirror, and my son, in his car seat, was happily gazing out the window, gnawing on a chicken McNugget.
I hadn't been to McDonalds in weeks.
My memory is fresher than that Mcnugget was.
#7
I was making dinner for my twin 18mo when boy twin starts to fuss, so I carefully put the knife about a foot away from the edge of the counter. I intentionally put it away from the edge because my girl twin is NOT to be trusted. I go change my boy and turn around and my girl is casually holding my large, sharp chopping knife. I had to get it from her like a hostage negotiator so she wouldn’t run away with it. I couldn’t figure out how she got it so I looked at the video and as soon as my back was turned she was grabbing the cutting board to pull the knife closer and then immediately skipped over the carrots and peeler to grab the knife. I was clearly correct in not trusting that feral child
Jessica Rabbit 2 years ago (edited)
"I was clearly correct in not trusting that feral child" had me crying with laughter...
#8
My older brother was the kind of baby that would get into things if you didn’t pay attention to him for second and it drove my parents crazy. My aunt told my mom she was just a bad parent so my mom said “Ok then. You babysit him tomorrow when I’m at work.” The next day my aunt called my mom while she was work freaking out. There was white smoke coming from up stairs and it turned out that my brother got ahold of baby powder and was just going ham on it upstairs. After that my aunt apologised to my mom.
Orange is aging 2 years ago
Never say that parent don’t know what they’re doing or are “bad parents” (unless they actually are). You probably don’t know the HALF of what their children do!
#9
She found some glitter
#10
Not me but my wife. Our two younger kids are 14 months apart. When our daughter was around 3 and our son was 2, my wife went into the garage to grab a frozen pizza out of the deep freezer and one of the kids, not sure which one, shut the door and locked my wife in the garage. She was banging on the door and could hear the little boogers in there laughing at her. My wife was not amused, she got a flathead screwdriver from my toolbox and manage to unlock the door. This all took 15 minutes or so, when she got in the house they were in their room watching cartoons and eating cookies they manage to steal. They would’ve left her out there all night. Its funny now 10 years later but my wife was scared s**tless. We have kept a spare key hidden in the garage ever since.
Kookamunga 2 years ago
Once I saw her screwdriver, I had to find a picture of the Mom.... giant-lady...f555e4.jpg 
#11
I was shopping in Sears with my son who was 4 years old at the time. I had to speak to one of the employees and I turned and he was gone in a matter of seconds.frantically calling his name, people are helping me look for him 10-15 minutes go by I'm crying I am extremely distressed of course and I hear a man calling and waving "over here over here " I run over to where he was and there is my 4-year-old sitting on a riding lawn mower that was on display making his vroom vroom noises, happy as a lark.
ForgotMyPWSendHelp 2 years ago (edited)
Can't help but be reminded that John Walsh's son Adam disappeared from a Sears around the same age. His partial remains were discovered several weeks later, and John Walsh went on to become a victim advocate and create the TV show America's Most Wanted. His personal tragedy has led to a lot of missing children being tracked and found and a lot of violent criminals being captured.
#12
I had been drinking scotch one evening while doing dishes. So I'm standing at the sink. I hear my 3 year old stumble into the room, pull a chair out from the table and climb up. I'm not thinking anything of this until I hear a small voice say "Juice!" as I turn to watch him dump about 1/2oz of single malt into his mouth. This was immediately followed by a gasp, then he turned bright white, then bright red.
He went to bed early that night.
#13
Getting ready for my first Christmas party at a company. It's a family affair. We all looked great. Hubby was already in the car, ran to the bedroom for something I forgot, we were running a little late. Ended up going to to the party with my 3 year old looking like a smurf because he thought my blue nail polish was "just like mommy's makeup". Still to this day don't know how he got the cap unscrewed because he's 10 now and can't open an already cracked bottle of water to save his life
#14
Left my son at the kitchen counter while preparing pancakes. One minute he’s there, the next thing I know he’s successfully empties the syrup bottle All. Over. The. Couch. I mean puddles of syrup in our cushions and pillows. First time as a parent I remember calling my mom crying because I was at such a loss for how to clean it all up.
May 2 years ago
I once babysat my 3 year old niece, who was the most well behaved little girl. She was drawing peacefully at the kitchen table, when I left her for 2-3 minuets to go pee. In those minuets she had run to the other bathroom, grabbed a shampoo bottle and squirted shampoo all over the couch, kitchen chairs and her fathers very expensive soundsystem. I was impressed with how much she had managed to cover. No permanent damage, thankfully. But a whole lot of cleaning up.
#15
Not my kid, but about 20 minutes ago a toddler just kinda... wandered into my apartment. I had the door unlocked so maintenance could come in and out while working on something. My daughter and I heard the TV go on and sure enough some little blonde girl with cute pigtails is just plopped down watching cartoons. Lol. Her parents were probably s***ting bricks.
#16
Went to the toilet, leaving the newborn asleep on a blanket on the floor (on top of a large fluffy carpet). 3 year old was watching tv nearby. Came back to find baby literally rolled up in carpet like a dead body, 3 year old sitting on top, with a cushion under him too. Still don’t know how he did it at all let alone so quickly, and how the baby was totally chilled and unharmed.
#17
I was the child in question, two years old at the time. We were at the beach, where about two feet into the sea there's a shelf where it suddenly gets twice as deep. My parents were distracted by my brother, so didn't notice me wander into the surf. When they next looked up, all the could see was my hat away floating on the water. Panic set in, and my dad sprinted into the sea. Discovered that I was still wearing the hat, and was somehow floating completely vertical with just the hat showing above the water.
Turns out this is not that uncommon! Remember, when you're near a body of water, never stop watching the kids.
Debbie 2 years ago
You cant never stop... like you said yourself, distracted by your brother. Even if there are 10 adults watching 1 kid, they can all get distracted by something at the same time, and that kid then has an accident/wanders off. Being startled by a seagull makes you look around, stepping on a sharp seashell, picking up the toy the kid has dropped. It can be anything.
#18
I work from home. My son is usually with me while I work in the evening. One night I take a call, he was sitting on the floor next to me playing with his cars (he's three). The next minute, I look over and watching him as he is flying through the air next to me. He had climbed up on our table and just launched himself off! I always mute myself when I'm not speaking when he's home so thank god the customer didn't hear my OH MY GOD as i caught him lol
#19
So we took the kids (7, 3, 3 and 3) to a water park. One of us would stay in the kiddie area with 2 of the triplets and the other parent would take one of the 3 year olds and the 7 year old on a ride. It was working pretty well.
Note, the kiddie area was mostly contained, but there was no gate or anything. At one of the swaps, we blinked for a second and our adventurous 3 year old was gone. Instant oh f**k panic. Get security there, staff is looking, I'm running around looking.
Anyway, we eventually found him. He had ridden a waterslide with my wife earlier, and decided "That was fun, I'm gonna do it again" The 3 year old had gone back to get in line for the waterslide by himself, and they found him about 2 from the front of the line.
#20
My daughter said "Ouch" and was looking at her thumb. A few minutes later the same thing happened. That is when I realized she was trying to stick a paper clip in an electrical outlet.
Fortunately no harm. I think that was the last time she was allowed to go to work with daddy.
#21
I had taken my four year daughter into a public toilet in France, which was next to a main road. As we left, I let go of her hand for a split second as I looked away to close the door behind us. When I looked back she was running into the main road as she'd seen her Mum on the other side. From where I stood, my view of the road was obstructed so I couldn't see if any cars were coming, and she had gone too far for me to catch her. By a complete miracle, she got safely over the road. It sends shivers down my spine remembering the helpless terror I felt when I saw her in the middle of the road.
#22
When my daughter was little, probably about 3, she went with me to shop for some tools. I turned away to look at something and heard behind me "Daddy, what's this?" "Uh, honey, that's an axe. Please give it to me." She did, and all was well, but I'm glad my wife wasn't there--she would have panicked.
#23
My toddler at the time grabbed a stick of butter out of the fridge and tossed it into the fish tank. Minutes later all the fish were floating dead in the fish tank. Last time we owned fish
#24
Went to pee , put my kiddos in there room with the door open and the gate up. I also had the bathroom door open...come out to find a dozen eggs cracked on the kitchen floor and into the butter and my youngest covered in peanut butter naked. My now ex husband was sleeping...I walked into our room woke him up and tagged out..my brain was fried at that point. To this day I have no clue how they escaped, they are 16&18 now.
#25
Woke up once and my two sons had climbed out of a window onto a flat roof. They were 1 and 3. I still don't know how they even got the window open.
M O'Connell 2 years ago
My parents were afraid of this happening and screwed blocks of wood to the window frames in my bedroom so the bottom sash could only open 3 inches.
#26
My daughter was 18 months old. Standing in between my husband and me in the kitchen, arm distance from both of us. She slipped, fell and broke two front teeth.
#27
Growing up we had a shed with our laundry room attached to our porch. My mom had me sitting on the floor of the porch playing with some toys (I was about 2), while she was doing laundry. I was just out of her eyeline for the time it takes to start a load of laundry, but by the time she turned around I had somehow managed to find a snake and had picked it up and was playing with it.
Emerald Ocean 2 years ago
When I was one I grabbed a yellow jacket and was playing with it. Got stung. Haven’t gotten stung since
#28
Telling it on my dad's behalf. On a fishing trip and I fell in a rapid while playing on the rocks. Never a strong swimmer, just kinda started my travel to the sea. He barely caught me by the arm.
#29
He was playing outside in the sand box just 10 feet from me. I had the window and door open and could hear him playing. Suddenly I was aware that he wasn't making any noise. I couldn't find him. I searched the yard, I asked strangers on the street and made a larger and larger circle and met my neighbors. 10 long minutes and he was nowhere. He had curled up in his stroller and was asleep.
ForgotMyPWSendHelp 2 years ago (edited)
I might get some flack for this, but I don't like the idea of letting a child small enough to still be in a stroller play outdoors in an open yard while the parent is indoors, even with a window and door open. If it's a fenced-in back yard, that seems fine. But kids can disappear in the blink of an eye, as this poster learned. They were lucky the kid didn't wander too far away or take off running into the street.
#30
I was sitting in a high chair, climbed out of it, onto the counter, and stole my mother’s coffee.
All she did was to put her shoes at the door, 3 feet away
What do you think ?
Annamagelic 2 years ago
Toddlers can be surprisingly fast when they want to, are exceptionally creative problem solvers, and have absolutely no sense of self preservation. I believe every one of these stories, and that the parents in question were all being reasonable, responsible people supervising their children as well as is humanly possible.
Rissie 2 years ago
I would not call it problem solving, chaotic creativity is more like it. I'm happy my oldest wasn't like that (sure he had some bumps and bruises but never the put a metal object in the socket kind of adventures) and the youngest was a little more spunky, but still well within manageable limits. Keeping him contained at playgrounds and at those indoor play areas was the best way to let all that energy out. I like to believe that providing ample other opportunities to let that out is the way to go. As in, if I couldn't take it anymore, which was pretty fast, I would go somewhere where they had fun and I had coffee. Yes. Great combo.
Load More Replies...
Lord Mysticlaw 2 years ago
I need to go and hug my kid because apparently she was the most angelic toddler ever
ForgotMyPWSendHelp 2 years ago (edited)
Yeah, my girl is chatty and a little smarty pants who thinks she's grown when she's only 2-and-a-half, but thankfully the worst she's done so far is scribble on the wall.
Load More Replies...
not your average weirdo 2 years ago
When I was like 7 my parents had left the room, so I grabbed a fistful of powdered sugar and tried to eat it. My parents came back into the room, asked me what I ate, and I started laughing. There was powdered sugar everywhere 😂
Annamagelic 2 years ago
Toddlers can be surprisingly fast when they want to, are exceptionally creative problem solvers, and have absolutely no sense of self preservation. I believe every one of these stories, and that the parents in question were all being reasonable, responsible people supervising their children as well as is humanly possible.
Rissie 2 years ago
I would not call it problem solving, chaotic creativity is more like it. I'm happy my oldest wasn't like that (sure he had some bumps and bruises but never the put a metal object in the socket kind of adventures) and the youngest was a little more spunky, but still well within manageable limits. Keeping him contained at playgrounds and at those indoor play areas was the best way to let all that energy out. I like to believe that providing ample other opportunities to let that out is the way to go. As in, if I couldn't take it anymore, which was pretty fast, I would go somewhere where they had fun and I had coffee. Yes. Great combo.
Load More Replies... Lord Mysticlaw 2 years ago
I need to go and hug my kid because apparently she was the most angelic toddler ever
ForgotMyPWSendHelp 2 years ago (edited)
Yeah, my girl is chatty and a little smarty pants who thinks she's grown when she's only 2-and-a-half, but thankfully the worst she's done so far is scribble on the wall.
Load More Replies... not your average weirdo 2 years ago
When I was like 7 my parents had left the room, so I grabbed a fistful of powdered sugar and tried to eat it. My parents came back into the room, asked me what I ate, and I started laughing. There was powdered sugar everywhere 😂
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