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30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Not every woman is meant for motherhood.

extrovertLibra , Dương Nhân Report

Final score:

219points

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Ivana Bašić 1 year ago

The only problem is that sometimes you don't realise that until it's too late.

73points

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you have to sacrifice every single bit of your body, time, and soul for your children. If breastfeeding is sucking the life out of you, literally and figuratively, and you hate it and it upsets you, then stop! Formula has kept babies alive for decades. If you’re at your wits end and are about to have a breakdown, it’s okay to lay baby down in the crib safely and walk away for a moment to catch your breath. Believe it or not, you don’t actually have to do those staged monthly photos with a sign that shows how old your infant is which you then post in FB.

Literally do what works best for you. You have to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others. A mentally well and happy mom is best for a healthy, happy baby.

anon , Kelly Sikkema Report

Final score:

201points

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Tinu 1 year ago (edited)

I don't get the controversy around childbirth and child-raising so much confusion on what is "right" and "wrong" breastfeeding or formula, home birth or hospital, and epidural or "natural" birth, just let people do as they see fit without judgement. I noticed alot of mothers get judged for get an epidural during childbirth because they did not experience real childbirth or took the "easy way out."

50points

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Your job is to raise good humans who can be independent one day. Not to make them your best friend. They will have their own friends. If you’re relying on your children to be your friends, you’re doing something wrong.

weasel999 , Anil Sharma Report

Final score:

165points

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setsuriseikou 1 year ago

I'd say it depends on the kids' age. When they are grown up, it's much better to acknowledge them as independent adults and be good friends with them, rather then continue thinking of them as unable to make decisions and live on their own.

50points

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better You are not “the giving tree” like the shel Silverstein book. Do not bend over backwards giving everything and doing everything for your kids. It only makes them entitled and you depressed. In fact, the job is slowly returning responsibility to the child so by the time they are 18 they are independent.

jumpingfox99 , Artem Podrez Report

Final score:

151points

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Kate Haslam 1 year ago

Don't become The Giving Tree. Spoiler alert: it doesn't end well for the tree.

60points

not_doing_that , Büşranur Aydın Report

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Sometimes you don’t immediately love your kid. When they placed my kiddo on my chest it was weird and took a couple days before I reconciled that this squirming loud person was the one I carried for months. I love my kiddo more now than I did then, after getting to know them.

And that’s ok. It’s not always that perfect love where nothing else matters instantly. Sometimes it takes time.

It’s also literally impossible to spoil an infant. If they are crying, they need you. Whether that’s changing, food, or comfort. When you let them “cry it out” you’re just teaching them they can’t depend on you. Studies show their stress levels don’t diminish when they stop crying. They just realize you’re going to fail at being there for them.

Final score:

149points

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AndThenICommented 1 year ago

Sorry but I have to add to the ‘cry it out’ thing - If it’s your sanity that’s being tested, let the bay cry it out. It’s hard to do, but it’s better to walk away to another room and release the pressure than put your baby or self in danger.

69points

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better You may not want to be a mother. Don't just have kids because that's what everyone else is doing.

WhiskeyChaser7 , Tahiti Spears Report

Final score:

146points

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Rylosalex 1 year ago

Yep, just ignore those loud mouths and just live your life your way

29points

BarbarianFoxQueen , Andrea Piacquadio Report

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Motherhood is not your identity. Don’t forget who you are before you had a baby. That person still deserves her dreams, ambitions, and experiences.

Final score:

134points

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Nadia D 1 year ago

This is so important! At the first place, it's a horrible thing to do for your kids - suffocating them with the burden of your sacrifice they didn't ask about at the first place)

19points

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better The moment when you birth your child won’t necessarily be a magical, happy moment like the movies make it out to be.

I was miserable. I felt sudden relief of all the pressure and pain, yes. But I was so horribly shocked about what had just happened to me that I didn’t feel happy. I felt traumatized and terrified. I was happy that my baby was okay, but I felt like I was just beyond messed up and dazed.

I felt like a bad mom for a long time for not being over the moon with joy. But it’s normal to feel that way and there’s nothing wrong with it . Birth IS traumatizing for a lot of women.

SmuttyFang , Yuris Alhumaydy Report

Final score:

114points

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UpQuarkDownQuark 1 year ago

Same goes for pregnancy itself. My friend was so excited to get pregnant after years of trying, expecting that she would be glowing with new life growing inside her. Instead she was sick the whole time and in the hospital for the week leading up to the birth.

37points

peppermintblues , Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas Report

#10

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you’re going to be happy all the the time even when baby is wanted- you’re not! In fact, you may even feel pretty bummed or miss your old life frequently and that’s normal . Older relatives telling you you’re a bad mom for not being 100% sparkles and s******g rainbows over baby have forgotten what it felt like

Final score:

102points

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My O My 1 year ago

Yep, you don't magically turn into a unicorn! Covering up...move along

6points

#11

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That every woman has maternal instinct and will eventually develop baby fever. Or if you enjoy spending time with children then it means you should become a mother.

nosiriamadreamer , Kristyn Lapp Report

Final score:

95points

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steaky 1 year ago

I enjoy spending time with children. But I don't want them myself. Nope nope nope. It is different to enjoy them a few times a week instead of being the parent 24/7.

41points

hansiepoopoo , Tanaphong Toochinda Report

#12

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you need to buy all kinds of gimmicky specialty items or your baby will suffer life long consequences. Like, I didn’t have a diaper wipe warmer, and my kids are successful adults...Don’t let capitalists take advantage of you and instill fear!

Final score:

95points

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Hyrule26 1 year ago

My father laughed out loud when she saw how expensive those 'baby bathtubs' or whatever they're called were. He did not let my mother buy one because he said we did not need it. He was right. The laundry sink worked fine. Also I never had a toddler bed. Just slept on a big mattress until I was old enough for a bedframe lol. I did occasionally roll off the mattress into the cupboard tho.

19points

#13

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Two kids is harder than one. Don't have another just to entertain the oldest, I know a few people that did that.

Also I don't think anyone emphasises how much you will lose yourself and truly get exhausted by it.

-Nikki-j , Josue Michel Report

Final score:

93points

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Kate Haslam 1 year ago

As the eldest sister, srsly. Your twelve-year-old needs to be a kid, not your free babysitter. Example: my friends came by to ask if I wanted to come ride bikes. Asked mom for permission. Permission granted, with a catch: I had to take my six-year-old little sister along, training wheels and all. So instead of riding bikes with my friends, I got an hour-long lecture about selfishness. Took her with the next time, she couldn't keep up, I had to take her home. There wasn't a next time after that. I love my sister, but I wish I could've been a kid a little longer.

62points

LegitimateStar7034 Report

#14

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That it gets easier or ever truly ends. It doesn’t and it won’t.

I have 3 kids, 20, 21 and 24. Teenage years are HARD and expensive if they play sports, especially travel. Don’t under estimate that commitment either, financially or time wise.
You also don’t stop ever being a parent. Especially if you’re a single parent. My husband died 5 years ago and finishing raising them alone blows.

Both of my sons are military and although they are perfectly capable and have done deployment, they still ask mom for things. Part of me enjoys it, it’s nice to be needed but…. other part is annoyed. You’re an adult, figure it out. Depending on the situation, I don’t help. You fix helicopters, you can make a doctor appointment.

They are my biggest joy and greatest accomplishments but it really is a life long commitment.

Final score:

83points

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Tams21 1 year ago

The challenges between a baby and a teenager change but they certainly don't get easier.

17points

#15

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That if you’re young and healthy it will be easy and safe. I was only 27 and a healthy active person, and pregnancy destroyed my body and I now have a ton of medical and very expensive dental issues that I never had prior to pregnancy. I’ve already lost 6 teeth and may need partial dentures. I have extreme tension headaches and vertigo, as well as horrible acne and hair I never had before. They really don’t stress enough how even one pregnancy can completely break down a healthy body

greenkyber , Robert Golebiewski Report

Final score:

83points

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GFSTaylor 1 year ago

Yet some people want to force women to carry and deliver accidental babies regardless.

66points

#16

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you won’t have a favourite kid. You will.

Late_Significance519 , Ben Wicks Report

Final score:

73points

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MarchingBanda786 1 year ago

I think all of us with siblings know this is true

48points

XenoMurph 1 year ago

I can honestly say I love each and every one of my children exactly the same. And I tell her so every day.

22points

Amy S 1 year ago

Talking as adults made me and my brother realise we both grew up thinking the other was the favourite!

17points

Cheeky chicken 1 year ago

I have 2 and I swear on whatever you hold dear I. Do. Not. Have. A. Favourite They are both very different, they both have things about them I adore and will never become tired of and they both do things that absolutely drive me up the wall. I have never once thought I favored one over the other and I love being in their company equally whether together or separately. I don't understand how some parents can be so obvious to other people they favour one child in particular

0points

Zophra 1 year ago

Who cleaned their room without complaining? Bam! Favorite kid (for the moment)

20points

Cate 1 year ago

Honestly, I don't have a favourite. I have favourite times with them all. They are individuals and like different things. So I will enjoy weekends away doing very little but read with one. Another adores camping. Another loves visiting historic sites. So I have favourite activities that I share with them, and I am equally proud of them for their different talent and skills.

18points

Pizzagirl 91 1 year ago

I feel the same with my twins. Unfortunately, I do feel a difference with my stepdaughter (nobody can tell me there's not a biological background), but I try to treat them equally. It's just hard to get it right when she's 4 years older and rarely there.

0points

Heather W 1 year ago

I have a favorite child. Sadly for my teenager, it's the cat.

17points

Zophra 1 year ago

I do relate to this.

3points

VonBlade 1 year ago

I 100% have a fave kid. It's not even close. Okay I only have one kid, but still.

17points

Tamra 1 year ago

Oh, my parents definitely had a favorite. How do I know? Because it wasn't me. Kids notice that s**t.

13points

Blarrg 1 year ago

This is an over generalization. Many parents do not have a favorite. Many parents do. Many parents' favorites change frequently. All of these are normal and are okay.

8points

Horst 1 year ago

I’m the fav and I hate it. My older sibling is a scape goat because I’m the golden child. I feel guilty and honestly hate my mom for it, even tho she’s chilled out a tiny bit

6points

Salsa Ambiguity 1 year ago

The really messed up thing is when you only have one kid and STILL somehow make them the least favorite. My best friend's parents constantly compared her to the hypothetical son they never had and she grew up feeling like they loved this imaginary kid more than the one they really had :/

3points

Mary Jeffries 1 year ago

I have four and my favorite is always shifting.

2points

The Queen 1 year ago

So glad I was raised as an only child. I've watched my friends deal with being the second favorite kid in their families. It's sad.

2points

Jen Hart 1 year ago

My mom had a son and a daughter; she calls us her "favorite son" or her "favorite daughter."

1point

Seabeast 1 year ago

It was only too obvious that my older brother was the Golden Child.

1point

Dorothy Stovall 1 year ago

The one who is most like you.

1point

OnAFreakingRollercoaster 1 year ago

No! All i can see is all my negative features in them. Therefore the one most like me, in my view, i like the least!!!

3points

Jo 1 year ago

Should go without saying, but don't let them know you have a favorite kid. It messes up the other kids. It's understandable that there is one, but to let them and the rest of the family know that THIS is my favorite child is cruel

0points

anime girl 1 year ago

And being the least favorite CRUSHES me. At my dad’s house, it goes my brother, my sister, ME. At my mom’s house, it goes my sister, my brother, ME. It may be that I’m the least needy, so they don’t need to pay too much attention to me, but SERIOUSLY!!! I’m also smarter, nicer, more respectful, more attentive, more focused, funnier, prettier, and more popular than my sister and brother, and yet I’m the least favorite. AND I’M THE MIDDLE AND ADOPTED CHILD!!!! ✨ dEpReSsIoN ✨

0points

Sylvia_SilverVampire 1 year ago

70% of parents have one. Only 10% will admit it.

0points

WA2DK 1 year ago

I have two adult daughters and I can honestly say I don't have a favorite. They're very different, and I love them for different personality traits, but I can't say one is my favorite.

0points

Andrea Careless 1 year ago

Not for me. They’re all special in they’re own different ways. 💞

0points

#17

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you are supposed to let a child “just cry it out.” No. That is garbage. You answer their cry, each and every time. By responding to them saying they need something in a consistent manner, you are literally laying the foundation of their trust in the world for the rest of their lives. If they don’t get their needs met when they express the need, they will learn to mistrust and be afraid of the world. Always answer the cry.

Scareyourfamily , Anna Shvets Report

Final score:

69points

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Tinu 1 year ago (edited)

I get this person's point but some kids just need to be ignored (not neglected) because they throw tantrums for absolutely useless reasons and attention. Like crying because they couldn't eat ice cream for breakfast, trust me I had three cousins under the age of 6. They are a handful you can't possibly attend to their tantrums everytime. By the way I am referring to toddlers not infants because the pic clearly shows a toddler.

39points

#18

That it's all joy and happiness and sunshine and the best thing ever. I saw a friend of FB asking others opinions on having kids as she wasn't sure. So many people were like ,"it's the best feeling ever and there's so much joy". Not a single one told her that it would likely also strain her marriage due to the extreme changes in the first year after having a baby, that she would feel exhausted and that as the child grew they would still demand a lot of her time and attention, and she would lose freedom to do whatever whenever, and she'd have make sure they had a sitter to have dates etc. No one told her the reality. They only tried to sell her on the dream, and I know damn well they all had the downside experiences too. I always wanted to be a mother, love my son and have no regrets, but I never doubted or was unsure of wanting him. And there is happiness and joy, but those are not the only feelings by far. And I feel society tried to deceive women into motherhood being so rewarding and amazing. It can be. But it can also be soul sucking and isolating and no one admits that enough.

shanbie_ Report

Final score:

62points

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Rylosalex 1 year ago

No shame in telling the truth, plus it could put alot of women's minds at rest

18points

Iamdollfacee94 , Andrea Piacquadio Report

#19

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you'll eventually get your body back.

HA!

Besides the fact that is hard to loose weight, sometimes you just don't have the time or the energy to diet and exercise, specially after a c section.

Sometimes all I want to do is watch TV in my PJs and binge ANY high calorie snack there is in the house.

If I had a dollar for every time someone has said I'd loose weight by breastfeeding I'd be fkn rich.

Body changes after pregnancy.

I had to say goodbye to many pretty and expensive shoes :(

Final score:

61points

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Weird Any 1 year ago

Probably will be downvoted, but I kept my body after the pregnancy. 67 kg right before childbirth, 59 kg on exit from hospital. No stretch marks. Maybe good genetics, but my doctor was always telling me "be brave". And, yes, breastfeeding keeps you fit. My son is a big boy now, healthy and happy, and so we are. Should I say I am not from US?

11points

#20

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That breastfeeding is easy and simple. Big nope to that one. My first one didn't latch properly, so I pumped. 2nd one latched fine, and I was really happy, until 3days later when I could peel the skin of my nipples. I cried every time when my baby was hungry before he was near me. I dreaded it so much, I was in constant pain. After a bit over a week I started pumping again. And I felt like an absolute fail. This time it was my fault, and that somehow was way worse. I knew it was fine, he got my milk and even formula would have been great, but it messes with your, already hormonal, brain so much.

xXChihime , Dave Clubb Report

Final score:

59points

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Tamra 1 year ago

This is something that needs more discussion. For me, breastfeeding was absolute torture. And I wanted it to work so bad. Turns out, my son had a tight frenulum (little attachment under the tongue), and had an impossible time latching, and being able to nurse long enough to get full. I nursed him every two hours around the clock. I was exhausted and depressed, and he was miserable too. Ended up pumping and supplementing with formula.

27points

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

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#21

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better This may sound harsh but don't expect to have a 'village'. Many people I know with young children struggle becaue they don't have a support network or childcare from grandparents. The thing is, a lot of grandparents are in their 40s/50s and are still working full time and struggle to fit everything in. I had no support when my girls were small and because of this, as a grandmother, I want to be there for my kids and grandkids but still have to work full time and can't always have them on my days off. Feel like I fail as a parent AND a now a grandparent most weeks.

Quick-Cattle-7720 , Marcus Aurelius Report

Final score:

58points

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OnAFreakingRollercoaster 1 year ago

This 💯 i have absolutely no village at all and it's ruined me

14points

#22

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Disciplining your child is harder than it seems.

It is very easy to spoil your kid. Especially if you have the means to, it is incredibly easy to want to spoil the f**k out of them. To buy them everything they want, either because you love them or because they won't stop crying.

It's so easy to want to blame another person for YOUR child's mistakes. You might even often have to catch yourself mid argument and realise that it is YOUR child who was in the wrong.

This all becomes even more true when you're a step-parent. You want to be the ideal parent and have your step-child get along with you or at least take some liking towards you. You'll inevitably have to buy them something at some point, but it's easy to want to shower them with your money to try win their favour. It's an easy trap to get caught in.

I don't know why so little people talk about this.

qqvxii , Polesie Toys Report

Final score:

56points

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LilliVB 1 year ago

Disciplining your kid is the $hittiest part of parenting. Nonetheless a real necessary one, if you don't want to have a spoiled entitled brat in your household.

20points

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

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#23

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better that it's an end of your own life.

no! not unless you make it so

Linorelai , Elina Sazonova Report

Final score:

55points

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Panda Kicki 1 year ago

Totally ! This was a happy surprice for me.

12points

#24

People call it having “kids”. I don’t like that phrase. IMHO Ultimately your job is to raise kids into good adults. People who can have loving respectful relationships. Who can be responsible and find their way in the world. You need to teach them values and ethics. Money skills, how credit card debt can hold them back. When they are really young how to take care of their nice belongings. Not to waste food and water. The importance of taking care of yourself and how to do that when life is challenging. The ability to laugh at yourself and not take things to serious.

Many of these lessons are learned by example the parent/parents or family lives by.

WorldlinessOk9287 Report

Final score:

54points

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RagDollLali 1 year ago

This. This is so important, and something so few people tak into consideration at the beginning of their children's lives. It's really hard to think beyond the age that they're at, but every consistent action or attitude you take with your children will eventually affect what kind of human being they are as adults. I find myself growing and changing my behavior all the time since I realized that my kids are watching so closely and will learn from everything I do.

8points

#25

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better (am a child but) if your older kid is 10+ yrs older than the younger kid, don't expect them to b a parent to the younger 1

My 16 yo cousin has to p much b a mom to her 3 yo sis cuz her actual mom is either out or in a rlly bad mood most of the time

GamerGirl-07 , Andrea Piacquadio Report

Final score:

45points

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Marie Dahme 1 year ago

This. Me and me youngest sister are 10 years apart. I took care of her all the time. Hated it. Hated having no privacy, always having to entertain her, always having to watch age appropriate tv shows, and having her pick food of my plate when she wasn’t hungry but now all of a sudden she is. And I hated being a free babysitter when I never got to go over my friends house on the weekends. Parents need to think if you’re having another child when there is a ten year age difference that YOU are responsible for your toddler…not the older sibling.

22points

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#26

Traditionally, “selfless” has been the highest compliment a mother can receive, and it’s a big fat lie. When the epitome of motherhood/womanhood is to lose one’s self completely, embracing this model only teaches our children, especially the girls, to do the same. We are better mothers, leaders and teachers when we model boundaries, self-care and self-respect. Obviously there is a great deal of unavoidable sacrifice involved with being an attentive mom, especially in the infancy and toddler phases, but it shouldn’t define a mother beyond that. Reminds me of the Jungian quote - “The greatest burden a child must bare is the unlived life of its parents.”

palebludot_bk Report

Final score:

44points

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Mary Jeffries 1 year ago

My situation was a bit extreme- I had two sets of twins within three years. Almost my entire existence for a few years was devoted to my kids because they as a unit needed so much attention. It felt a bit freeing to let go any career aspirations or personal hobbies because it would have been impossible at that time. But from an early age we worked with them to be as independent as possible. Makes a great difference in my happiness now they’re a bit older.

12points

#27

That unless you breastfeed full time then ween them onto organic food, you're doing a bad job.

I could only breastfeed my child for 4 weeks due to being so anaemic and ill after his birth, my body literally couldn't produce enough milk to feed him. So I started to bottle fed him and it was the best thing I could have done, as it allowed my husband to take over some night feeds and let me rest. When I weened him at 7 months old, I fed him a healthy, balanced diet. I remember being mum shamed by reading posts on social media from parents who made all their children's food and blended it all themselves etc. This guilt lasted about 1 week from me, then I released that I worked full time, fed my child a healthy diet and they were happy and healthy, and I moved on quickly from the guilt.

We're all just trying our best to survive parenthood while trying to support and encourage our little ones to become happy, loving little humans in themselves.

sunmoonstars89 Report

Final score:

42points

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GFSTaylor 1 year ago

A friend of mine couldn't breastfeed at all, due to severly inverted nipples. Both were exclusively bottle fed. At ages 10 and 17, both kids are healthy, active and doing well at school.

16points

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

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#28

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That thinking it’s “the best thing you’ll ever do” is enough to have a kid.

That you can just figure it out.

That it’s ok to be a mom if you haven’t begun to deal with your own childhood trauma.

Having a kid means learning to put another human first. Always. Not at the expense of your own well being, I’m not into self sacrifice and that can absolutely be a form of abuse in itself, but too many people enter motherhood lackadaisically and, as someone who has worked with survivors of abuse and neglect for nearly two decades, I’m over it.

It’s wild to me that anyone can be a parent when you need to apply for a drivers license! It’s wild you can hire full time care to raise your kids while you don’t spend any time with them at all. It’s wild that folks use an ACTUAL HUMAN to magically solve their problems.

I get it. Society makes you think that way. Birth control should be more accessible. Motherhood should be more equitable.

But we are putting real human lives at stake when we don’t implore people to really think and ensure they are ready to be a parent before doing so.

Note: once someone has a kid that kid should be theirs and the child welfare system sucks, is racist and classist and horrible. I’m talking about preventing it BEFOREHAND. Which is why, for the love of goddess, reproductive healthcare should be free and accessible to everyone.

If I see one more post from someone who is thinking about having a. Baby, and someone else writes back saying that “it was the best thing I ever did” WITHOUT mentioning how it’s working out for the kiddo…..

It’s. About. The. Kid.

Rant over.

AtypicalCommonplace , Monstera Report

Final score:

40points

POST

Helena 1 year ago

A better solution is child psychology and parenting classes middle school through high school. Best thing we could do for better mental wellness as a nation.

4points

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

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#29

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That you're always going to make the right choices for your child.

anon , Caleb Oquendo Report

Final score:

38points

POST

The Short Lady 1 year ago

Do your best and don't make choices based on an attempt to live through your child.

8points

Sweet-Strawberry-119 , Kelly Sikkema Report

#30

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That it gets easier.

Final score:

30points

POST

Panda Kicki 1 year ago

I think this is depending on your expectations. I had prepared for the worst, like all the warning posts here. Still waiting for it to happen, but several kids later nothing has been as bad as I imagined it would be, even with some bumps in the road.

10points

Candid-Complaint2267 , RODNAE Productions Report

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#31

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better Nothing puts a target on your back for abuse like having a child. I can't stress this enough.

Final score:

12points

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Adam Elder 1 year ago

Having read all 36, my take on it, and what my wife and I did was do our best. That's all, do your best, don't be afraid to ask for help, it doesn't mean you're a bad mother, it means you're a good mother. Just do your best, little one will love you for it.

6points

#32

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better I know this comment isn’t for everyone, but, uh, when the father says he is going to be responsible and involved no matter what, many times they aren’t. Just ask yourself the question of how you would raise a child by yourself if it came to that.

FabulousPossession73 , Anna Shvets Report

Final score:

12points

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Amy S 1 year ago

It's important for men to think about this too, women can leave or die suddenly. If you can afford to take out life insurance please think about doing so because the financial hit of losing on parent can be huge and struggling with bills is the last thing anyone would want when they are greaving.

5points

BellaFromSwitzerland , Amina Filkins Report

#33

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better About childbirth:

- don’t look at it in terms of natural vs medicine-lead. Think of it in terms of what leaves you in the best of shape, physically and mentally, to be fit enough to care for your baby 24/7

From this perspective epidural > C-section > natural (drug-free) birth

ETA:

- only have babies if you feel your life will be incomplete without them AND if you’re fine taking care of them in case you become the sole caregiver

- if you’re in a relationship, only have babies if your partner is equally keen. One fence sitter + one wannabe parent = not enough

- you don’t need a lot of money in the first year. You can rough it with second hand equipment and breastfeeding

- make sure to have health insurance for both mom and baby

Final score:

11points

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Lara M 1 year ago

Hard disagree on epidural > C-section > "natural" birth. A C-section is major surgery and the recovery period is pretty hard. You're not allowed to lift heavy things for 6 weeks after. A no-intervention birth is very hard while you're doing it, but the recovery is way faster.

5points

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

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#34

30 Lies About Motherhood That Future Moms Should Be Aware Of, As Shared By Moms Who Already Know Better That all your friends peace on you. I haven’t been isolated and my friendships haven’t changed. It just takes a bit more work (like any life event).

ShallotZestyclose974 , LinkedIn Sales Solutions Report

Final score:

4points

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Mary Jeffries 1 year ago

Yep, this happened.

0points

#35

Everyone will judge you but very rarely people will compliment or encourage you.

Having babies ruins your body and it’s take it’s toll on self esteem.

Kids aren’t moldable like you think, they all come with their very own disposition and temperament. You can do everything “right” and still have a hard kid.

0-5 are the easy years, wait til you have teachers and school friends parents calling

It’s mostly not fun, even the fun days like holidays and vacations are a lot of work.

Giving birth is the most miraculous thing a woman can experience.

Everyone has mom guilt

ApprehensiveReach125 Report

Final score:

0points

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setsuriseikou 1 year ago

Considering the (terrifying) fact that some women don't survive childbirth, I doubt it is universally miraculous for everybody.

13points

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

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Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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Rasa is a photo editor at Bored Panda, they have a college degree in photography and are currently studying sewing. Ever since childhood Rasa was interested in visual arts, including painting, photography, knitting and so on. When not at work or studying they like to knitting, cooking and spending quality time with their cats.

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What do you think ?

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Sue Bradley 1 year ago

Your child will have their own characteristics which whilst can be tempered, cannot be totally changed. A sensitive or very outgoing child will not be greatly affected by ie nursery will change or help them - no!!!! An active child won't learn from accidents, and a quiet child will likely alway be the same. Don't feel bad if you cannot change behaviours that you feel would enhance your child's life

8points

Mary Jeffries 1 year ago

Having twins really brought that home to me. They are so much themselves and you can’t mold them into something else.

2points

An Unpopular Opinion. 1 year ago

Even after this post - I still want kids when I'm older. I understand it's painful, I'm more ways thenone but... I think it'll be totally worth it

2points

An Unpopular Opinion. 1 year ago

*then one

0points

Dizzie D 1 year ago

A lot of this is all very negative and quite a few are saying ' don't feel pressured to connect with your child' or 'don't beat yourself up if you don't even like your baby etc'. Erm this is not normal and the vast majority of mothers instantly bond and love their baby. If you really don't, you should get checked out by a Doctor and perhaps treated for post partum depression before it takes a big hold over you.

2points

Dizzie D 1 year ago

To add to this - nature has made it a strong biological urge that a female protects and bonds with its young for obvious species survival reasons. If this feeling isn't there at all, somethings not right.

1point

Noname 1 year ago

I don't understand why there are so many articles on Bored Panda regarding women and children. Is there some faction in the USA forcing women to have children and shaming them for not having children ? If so, You ladies gotta grow a spine a stand up for yourself. I have a friend who isn't married and I've never brought up the subject, but she keeps telling me why she doesn't want to have kids. I'm glad she hasn't had kids and I'd be worried if she did have children because she absolutely hates kids-she barely acknowledges the ones I have! I have 4, love them all very much, don't regret my decision, but I've NEVER looked at another woman and wondered why she's as o'd as she is and doesn't have kids. Parenting isn't for everyone!! The father of my eldest children is a great father, the father of my youngest has no interest in being a parent. I made my choices and I've remained committed to my children, but being a parent is not for everyone.

2points

Lara M 1 year ago

Corporate propaganda. It's pretty much impossible to have a child under US conditions (no maternity leave, no extended family support, barely any support from the father) and to remain sane. Since the corporate powers that be don't want us actually demanding maternity leave or other accommodations for motherhood, they pressure us to accept that severe stress in postpartum moms is normal and that it's normal to experience postpartum depression and psychosis and to snap from the sleep deprivation.

3points

Javel! 1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

3points

Erin Roberts 1 year ago

"Is there some faction in the USA forcing women to have children and shaming them for not having children ?" Uh...yes? Did you not see Roe v Wade get overturned?

0points

Katie Andrews 1 year ago

Can I just say, as an older, post-menopausal, childfree woman, how FANTASTIC this post is? Some of us, like me, knew from single digits I never wanted kids, but I DESPISED all the coercion, fortunately none from my family, who knew, loved, and respected me. Other people? OMG WHYYYYYYYYYYYY don't you want a kid? I'm so glad now that the hard stuff is talked about. Growing up, my BS radar kept going off, because it was all toxic positivity, without any real truth-telling about the difficulties of parenting. This is a far better way to be.

2points

Mary August 1 year ago

Having kids is expensive!

2points

Robyn Rob 1 year ago

That post partum depression is a real thing and not all moms are overjoyed during the newborn phase. My kid was in the hospital for first two months of life, and when she got home she never slept and I had no help. I thought I had made a big mistake and had a nervous breakdown. Through meds and therapy I got through it and my kid is a happy and healthy teen now.

2points

Nancy Walker 1 year ago

I am 66 years old and I am so pleased to have read such honest and truly liberating notes in this article from BP. So many could have been helped had these topics been shared openly 75, 59 or even 25 years ago. Instead too many women suffered in silence and without the knowledge that they were not alone, or bad, unhinged or selfish. Kudos to the individuals who shared, and in some cases deeply personal, stories. You are my heros. Thank you.

1point

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Sue Bradley 1 year ago

8points

Mary Jeffries 1 year ago

Having twins really brought that home to me. They are so much themselves and you can’t mold them into something else.

2points

An Unpopular Opinion. 1 year ago

Even after this post - I still want kids when I'm older. I understand it's painful, I'm more ways thenone but... I think it'll be totally worth it

2points

An Unpopular Opinion. 1 year ago

*then one

0points

Dizzie D 1 year ago

2points

Dizzie D 1 year ago

1point

Noname 1 year ago

2points

Lara M 1 year ago

3points