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“[Am I The Jerk] For Leaving When Our Friends Brought Their Dog To Dinner?”
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“[Am I The Jerk] For Leaving When Our Friends Brought Their Dog To Dinner?”

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‘Nobody’s perfect!’ the character of the classic old comedy declared, and you know – it’s damn fair. After all, what we may consider to be an undoubted shortcoming in another person, other people may well consider to be a virtue. Even if the other person doesn’t like dogs…

Imagine – this does happen, although in my personal opinion, doggos are among the best creatures that ever existed… But let’s not get distracted. So, the user u/CheapBeautiful6357, the author of this our story today, really doesn’t like dogs, and this is only recently seems to have cost him many years of friendship. Okay, now let’s talk about everything in order.

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    The author of the post, as he himself admits, is not a dog person at all

    Image credits: Juli Kosolapova (not the actual photo)

    Moreover, some of the guy’s previous relationships even ended because of this reason

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    Image credits: CheapBeautiful6357

    However, the author’s current fiancee shares his beliefs – but their friends have a doggo and are huge dog lovers

    Image credits: Xochi (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: CheapBeautiful6357

    Recently, after seeing that the friends brought their dog to their joint dinner, the author even stormed out of the restaurant – and got called a jerk for doing so

    Meet the Original Poster (OP) – a 27 Y.O. guy who, in his own words, can’t stand dogs at all. Yes, this is the truth – he’s absolutely not a dog person. Moreover, the author admits that in the past, several of his relationships even ended for this particular reason. But now the man has found himself a girlfriend who completely shares his attitude towards dogs.

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    At the same time, the OP and his fiancee have a couple of friends who, in turn, are devoted dog owners. They got a dog over COVID, and since then they have literally doted on her. However, friendship is friendship, and they, respecting the original poster’s beliefs, try to hire a dog-sitter when they go to hang out somewhere together.

    This time, however, it turned out differently. The friends agreed to meet in one restaurant, from the pet-friendly category, where there is a patio with tables for dog owners. However, the OP, as always, asked his friends in advance not to take their pet with him. Imagine the surprise, disappointment and indignation of the author and his fiancee when, upon entering the bar, they found their friends at a table on the patio – along with their dog.

    According to one of the dog owners, the petsitter was unable to come this time, so they took the dog with them. But the original poster had already seen red and, not wanting to ‘share his lunch with an animal,’ he first looked for other places in the bar, and when he couldn’t find them, just announced that he and his fiancee were leaving.

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    And so they left. Of course, the author’s friend was no less indignant, and wrote several angry texts about how rudely he acted. To this, the original poster replied that he did not want to spend time with his dog. However, the OP’s unshakable confidence in his rightness seems to have cracked a bit – otherwise he probably wouldn’t have asked the question “AITA?”

    Image credits: Susn Matthiessen (not the actual photo)

    Before we begin to make any judgments, let’s first ask ourselves a completely logical question – do people really have reasonable motives not to like dogs? No, not an allergy, but mainly psychological reasons. And the experts confidently answer us: “Yes!”

    For example, according to this material on the Holiday Barn pet resort website, there are four main reasons why people may avoid dogs in everyday life:

    • lack of association with dogs,
    • the belief that dogs are dirty and should be left outside,
    • aversion to dog odor,
    • bad past experience.

    Moreover, according to this study, conducted back in 2012, some people even have genetic preconditions for hostility towards dogs (or cats). In other words, some of us, even despite our upbringing, seem really predisposed to seek out the company of pets.

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    As we can see from the title of this study, the age category in which the research was conducted was middle-aged men – and the original poster, at the age of 27, is confidently approaching this category. On the other hand, it’s always easy to explain your not-so-nice actions with external reasons, isn’t it?

    As for the commenters on the original post, their opinions were strongly divided. Some argue that the author simply behaved incredibly rudely towards his friends, who are not to blame for the fact that the pet-sitter could not come. Someone thinks that everyone here was wrong – because the friends could at least have warned about the current situation in advance.

    And many commenters are also justifying the original poster’s actions, arguing that he has every right to have his own beliefs about animals, and his friends are probably poor pet owners. “Who needs a dog sitter to go out to dinner for a couple of hours (considering the dog isn’t a new puppy)? Ridiculous,” one of the folks in the comments summarizes. So what do you, our dear readers, think about this story?

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    Meanwhile, the internet was very divided over this question – but it turns out, there are several reasons for people to dislike dogs, other than allergies

    Image credits: Petr Urbanek (not the actual photo)

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    Oleg Tarasenko

    Oleg Tarasenko

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    After many years of working as sports journalist and trivia game author and host in Ukraine I joined Bored Panda as a content creator. I do love writing stories and I sincerely believe - there's no dull plots at all. Like a great Italian composer Joaquino Rossini once told: "Give me a police protocol - and I'll make an opera out of it!"

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    Oleg Tarasenko

    Oleg Tarasenko

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    After many years of working as sports journalist and trivia game author and host in Ukraine I joined Bored Panda as a content creator. I do love writing stories and I sincerely believe - there's no dull plots at all. Like a great Italian composer Joaquino Rossini once told: "Give me a police protocol - and I'll make an opera out of it!"

    Denis Krotovas

    Denis Krotovas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. While studying at Vilnius Tech University, I learned how to use Photoshop and decided to continue mastering it at Bored Panda. I am interested in learning UI/UX design and creating unique designs for apps, games and websites. On my spare time, I enjoy playing video and board games, watching TV shows and movies and reading funny posts on the internet.

    Read less »

    Denis Krotovas

    Denis Krotovas

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. While studying at Vilnius Tech University, I learned how to use Photoshop and decided to continue mastering it at Bored Panda. I am interested in learning UI/UX design and creating unique designs for apps, games and websites. On my spare time, I enjoy playing video and board games, watching TV shows and movies and reading funny posts on the internet.

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    Sonja
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really don't like dogs. I don't like to touch them, I hate it when they bark, I don't like the smell on my hands. But a quiet dog laying under a table not touching me? I couldn't care less. It's like the one commenter said: they make their hate of dogs the whole point of their personality and that is strange. My MIL has a poodle. She brings her everywhere. She doesn't bark, she doesn't smell and as soon as she's settled I forget she's there. They don't bring her into my home because I have cats and she would try to hunt them. They respect that. But I wouldn't dream of making such a drama about her anyplace else just because she's existing. That's nasty and far over the line of reason.

    ValdaDeDieu
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's NTA. I LOVE DOGS, have had them all my life. But someone who has a problem with dogs should not be subjected to having dogs forced on them. That is so wrong. My dog is the BEST DOGGO in the whole world, but if someone has a phobia, I'm not letting him near them. It's simply manners, people. Whatever happened to MANNERS? BigM-656a2...3c0580.jpg BigM-656a2c73c0580.jpg

    Load More Replies...
    Heather Evans
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have dogs, I love dogs, they are part of our family .. but i don't understand people who feel the need to take their dogs everywhere. And truthfully some dog parents are insufferable with their animals .. like you can leave your dog for 10 minutes without checking on her Todd. She will be fine

    Melia Janssen
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think that's the difference. You are one of the rare few dog parents who are actually aware of the difference, and you are aware that your dogs aren't your children and you don't treat them as such. There are too many dog parents who treat their dogs better than ttheir children and those I can't stand because they make their dogs the centre of their universe and you can't do anything with them without having their dogs there with them. We're also the only family on our street who doesn't have a dog. All our neighbours, except one with small kids, do so I'm used to being around dogs and I'm not going to be unkind to them, but I'm never getting one. They're a lot of work!

    Load More Replies...
    Ace
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The OP doesn't suggest that it was too cold outside, nor give any other reason why sitting outside was not acceptable to them. Sounds very much TA to me, the dog wouldn't inconvenience them in the least. On the plus side with that sort of attitude they'll lose their friends very quickly - if it's not about dogs, it will be about kids later, or they'll find something else they expect their friends to work around. I foresee a lonely old age for them

    Hey!
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Easily, the friend with the dog could have called OP to let them know he couldn't find another sitter. Let's reschedule or do you mind? Nope. He decided to dump the dog on the couple. The friend with the dog is TA here, not OP.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Sonja
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really don't like dogs. I don't like to touch them, I hate it when they bark, I don't like the smell on my hands. But a quiet dog laying under a table not touching me? I couldn't care less. It's like the one commenter said: they make their hate of dogs the whole point of their personality and that is strange. My MIL has a poodle. She brings her everywhere. She doesn't bark, she doesn't smell and as soon as she's settled I forget she's there. They don't bring her into my home because I have cats and she would try to hunt them. They respect that. But I wouldn't dream of making such a drama about her anyplace else just because she's existing. That's nasty and far over the line of reason.

    ValdaDeDieu
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's NTA. I LOVE DOGS, have had them all my life. But someone who has a problem with dogs should not be subjected to having dogs forced on them. That is so wrong. My dog is the BEST DOGGO in the whole world, but if someone has a phobia, I'm not letting him near them. It's simply manners, people. Whatever happened to MANNERS? BigM-656a2...3c0580.jpg BigM-656a2c73c0580.jpg

    Load More Replies...
    Heather Evans
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have dogs, I love dogs, they are part of our family .. but i don't understand people who feel the need to take their dogs everywhere. And truthfully some dog parents are insufferable with their animals .. like you can leave your dog for 10 minutes without checking on her Todd. She will be fine

    Melia Janssen
    Community Member
    7 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think that's the difference. You are one of the rare few dog parents who are actually aware of the difference, and you are aware that your dogs aren't your children and you don't treat them as such. There are too many dog parents who treat their dogs better than ttheir children and those I can't stand because they make their dogs the centre of their universe and you can't do anything with them without having their dogs there with them. We're also the only family on our street who doesn't have a dog. All our neighbours, except one with small kids, do so I'm used to being around dogs and I'm not going to be unkind to them, but I'm never getting one. They're a lot of work!

    Load More Replies...
    Ace
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The OP doesn't suggest that it was too cold outside, nor give any other reason why sitting outside was not acceptable to them. Sounds very much TA to me, the dog wouldn't inconvenience them in the least. On the plus side with that sort of attitude they'll lose their friends very quickly - if it's not about dogs, it will be about kids later, or they'll find something else they expect their friends to work around. I foresee a lonely old age for them

    Hey!
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Easily, the friend with the dog could have called OP to let them know he couldn't find another sitter. Let's reschedule or do you mind? Nope. He decided to dump the dog on the couple. The friend with the dog is TA here, not OP.

    Load More Replies...
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