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When we think about talents, we often imagine something cool, valuable and impressive. From painting to playing an instrument, these abilities immediately bring us into the spotlight and make us a teeny tiny bit better than anyone born without them.

But this online group celebrates exactly the opposite of that. Welcome to the “Learn Useless Talents” subreddit, a miscellaneous home to 694k members who share not just talents, but the most useless ones of all.

“This is a place to learn how to do cool things that have no use other than killing time and impressing strangers,” the group’s description reads, so I leave the stage to some of the best (and most useless!) posts posted here.

#1

Ima Do This

Ima Do This

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DEW
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're the best! Totally going to do this and share!! Your legacy will live on!! When this takes off make sure you get the credit!!

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#2

How To Gird Up Your Loins When The Wedding Party Is Over

How To Gird Up Your Loins When The Wedding Party Is Over

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#3

How To Tell Apart Various Language Writings

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When we speak about learning new skills, whether it’s something we’re talented in or not, it’s impossible not to address people’s obsession with improving themselves and becoming better in one way or another. Life hacks seem to be everywhere these days, from little things like easily opening stuck jar lids to more profound ones like becoming more productive and learning to use your time wisely on a daily basis.

To better understand this phenomenon that has been everywhere on social media, we reached out to Mike Sturm, a productivity and personal growth expert, who thinks that the current obsession with life hacks is about 2 main things.

“First, we love to be inventors and discoverers. If we believe we've come up with something no one else has, or discovered something that very few others know about, we get a kick out of it. Secondly, many of us really believe that making everything we do as efficient as possible is the way to a great life,” Sturm argues.

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#5

How To Split A Donut

How To Split A Donut

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#6

How To Make A Grim Reaper Puppet Using Your Sleeve And Hand

How To Make A Grim Reaper Puppet Using Your Sleeve And Hand

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On the other hand, “the problem is that if you make something super-efficient, but it's something you probably should have stopped trying to do long ago, you're not any better for it. In fact, you're probably worse off—because you've invested time and energy on this thing that really doesn't bring value to your life,” the productivity coach explained.

#7

How To Make An Amazing Sofa Fort

How To Make An Amazing Sofa Fort

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enigma
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yo,this aint useless my guy,who put the hideout for me and the gremlins here?(the gremlins is the name we gave me and my friends.

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#8

How To Properly Peal A Post-It Note From The Stack

How To Properly Peal A Post-It Note From The Stack

Real_Floop Report

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Our obsession with life hacks indicates that we spend a lot of time thinking that what makes for a good life has a lot to do with how we are perceived by others. “Do they think we're cool, smart, innovative, strong, etc.? But what others think of us—even what those close to us think—is just a proxy for what's more important: are we bringing value to others? Are we uncovering meaningful truths in the world? Are we genuinely improving some small part of the world?” Sturm wonders.

“But often times, the things that go viral and get you noticed quickly are not what brings the most value,” he added.

#10

How To Make A Pants Backpack

How To Make A Pants Backpack

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Lakota Wolf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm doing this tomorrow and waiting to see how long it takes before someone notices and says "Are those PANTS??"

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#12

Learn How To Draw A Sheep

Learn How To Draw A Sheep

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It’s also worth noting that a lot of life hacks surfing online seem to be either absurd or totally useless, aka how to peel a cucumber with cling tape. In response to this, Sturm quoted Peter Drucker: "There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all."

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According to Sturm, we only get one shot at this life (that we know of). “And while I can't deny that it's fun sometimes to figure out novel ways to peel vegetables with household items, there's only a small amount of that kind of stuff that brings real value to your life. There are things that are worth working on to make more efficient. Those are the things that need to be done, because if they're not, then what's important to you will suffer,” he explained.

#14

Well, Then

Well, Then

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Den Ver
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was on a bus tour where someone took a drink from a can of Coke and got stung. They couldn't stop crying, so I asked if it was a Bee or a Wasp -- they didn't know. . . . It Makes A Difference. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I told them, if it was a bee, it would have left behind a stinger and a venom sack. When took a look, I could see it in the roof of their mouth. Using the tweezers from a swiss army knife, I extracted it and solved the problem. Instant pain relief. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . If you've read this far, you've learned some "useless" information like the other people on the bus.

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#15

Nato Phonetic Alphabet

Nato Phonetic Alphabet

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Khara Mei
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is the opposite of useless. Very useful, recommended to remember.

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Sturm argues that what this all comes down to is getting clear on what's important to you—really important. “What do you want out of this life? What needs to happen for your life to get that way? And if you're not sure yet what you want out of life, then that's the most important thing for you to do right now,” he said and added that “no amount of finding better ways to do mundane things will find that out for you.”

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#16

Does Learning Strange Spoken Language Rules Count?

Does Learning Strange Spoken Language Rules Count?

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Passerby
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now, I wonder what that censored word is. It is not like there are any other repeated instances of that word, right?

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#18

How To Survive Being Buried Alive

How To Survive Being Buried Alive

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#19

The Gentlemans Guide To Amputation

The Gentlemans Guide To Amputation

PillowDan Report

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PickleRick
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd need a lot of brandy before this no matter which person I am in the equation.

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#20

How To Fold A Napkin To Fit Three Pieces Of Silverware

How To Fold A Napkin To Fit Three Pieces Of Silverware

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#21

Become The Master Of Shadows With These Simple Steps (Plus Its A Cool Title For Your Resume)

Become The Master Of Shadows With These Simple Steps (Plus Its A Cool Title For Your Resume)

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#22

How To Make A Quick Escape

How To Make A Quick Escape

Ktr0x Report

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DEW
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love this!! I've seen the video of this young man doing it!! He's impressive!

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#24

How To Create Glyphs

How To Create Glyphs

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#26

How To Bounce A Dinner Roll

How To Bounce A Dinner Roll

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#27

Make Paper Boat Out Of Toilet Paper Roll

Make Paper Boat Out Of Toilet Paper Roll

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#29

How To Fold A Plastic Bag Properly. Not Just Scrunch It Up Into A Ball

How To Fold A Plastic Bag Properly. Not Just Scrunch It Up Into A Ball

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#30

How To Find Waldo

How To Find Waldo

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#31

You Can Unfold Kinder Egg Pods Into Desktop Catapults

You Can Unfold Kinder Egg Pods Into Desktop Catapults

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#32

How To Turn Your Cat Into A Bunny

How To Turn Your Cat Into A Bunny

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Brazen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I did that once to my cat. I laughed so hard while he, on the other hand, was plotting my demise.

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#33

How To Casually Get In Water As A Big Man

How To Casually Get In Water As A Big Man

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#34

How To Loudly Whistle With Four Fingers In Your Mouth

How To Loudly Whistle With Four Fingers In Your Mouth

thetinymoo Report

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sturmwesen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I nearly barfed trying it. I guess I will keep whistling like a peasant with dry fingers.

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#35

How To Draw A Boy From The Word "Boy"

How To Draw A Boy From The Word "Boy"

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Beck
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is how I was able to tell lowercase b and d apart. Make a b with left hand. d with right. Put then together and it looks and spells bed without the e.. This reminded me off that.

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#37

How To Be A Table

How To Be A Table

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Frank
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You'll need 5 people: 1 to pull the chairs. Incomplete instructions, we need to sue.

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#38

How To Make Your Lipstick Last Through Eating

How To Make Your Lipstick Last Through Eating

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#40

How To Slice A Bagel Into Two Congruent, Linked Halves

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#41

How To Look Behind You (Without Looking Behind You)

How To Look Behind You (Without Looking Behind You)

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Enuya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This one can actually be helpful if you're followed. You can somewhat control a situation without scaring attacker into doing something unpredictable

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#42

How To Read Korean In 15 Minutes

How To Read Korean In 15 Minutes

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Thiago Meira
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Usefull when you travel and need to read signs, menus and other stuff, despite not understanding

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#43

How To Make A Baseball Cap Lincoln From A Five Dollar Bill

How To Make A Baseball Cap Lincoln From A Five Dollar Bill

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#45

Cook Water

Cook Water

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Toolkit
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I tried the recipe, followed it step by step, would recommend 100 percent,no allergies and good for ppl on diet too, easy to make, and very delicious too 😂

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#46

How To Tell The Different Types Of Watch Hands And What To Call Them

How To Tell The Different Types Of Watch Hands And What To Call Them

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#47

It Seems Useless Until You Need It

It Seems Useless Until You Need It

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Khara Mei
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now this is strange, but I have indeed had to do this when I worked at the zoo. This is what we did, with four people because it needed extra security on the wings as one wing was injured.

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#49

How To Crack An Egg With One Hand

How To Crack An Egg With One Hand

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SobyKay
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

always wanted to do this, may try if I feel like making a crazy mess on the kitchen 😂

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#52

Identifying Different Types Of Lamps

Identifying Different Types Of Lamps

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#53

How To Be Mildly Successful At Rope Ladder Carnival Games

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#54

Crossing Piranha-Infested Water

Crossing Piranha-Infested Water

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Izzy Curer
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They did an episode on River Monsters where Jeremy Wade crawled into a tub full of piranhas to prove that they're not nearly as dangerous as old adventure stories like to make them out to be. The ones in the tub just acted like scared fish.

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#55

Double Knot Shoelace Method

Double Knot Shoelace Method

Monic_maker Report

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Good Luckas
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom taught me that but only pull one finger on each hand to make a single knot. It’s so useful and I can tie my shoes faster than anyone I’ve ever met!

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#56

How A Bar Code Supposedly Works

How A Bar Code Supposedly Works

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Khara Mei
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know EAN13, definitely not it, barcodes are all numbers too, it also lacks a start/stop so could never be read properly. In fact, I think this is just the 3 of 9 font.

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#57

Make A Huge Splash

Make A Huge Splash

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#59

How To Fit A Round Peg In A Square Hole

How To Fit A Round Peg In A Square Hole

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#60

How To Commit Seppuku!

How To Commit Seppuku!

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Lakota Wolf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love how BP censors words like "die", "death", and "suicide", but put a pictorial guide to killing yourself with a sword into an article.

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