ADVERTISEMENT


People say, some things are better left unsaid, which seems more true than ever when it comes to telling parents things you reeaaally don’t want them to know. Whether it’s questionable life choices, or quests you wish you never took part in, it often looks like it would be best to keep them to yourself for the sake of both yourself and your folks.

Members of the ‘Ask Reddit’ community have opened up about things they wouldn't want their parents to know after one of them started a discussion on the topic, and they got quite honest about it. Their stories ranged from petty theft and blaming their siblings to confessions way deeper and more emotional than that, so if you, too, have something you don’t want to share with your folks, scroll through the list below to see that you’re definitely not alone.

Below you will also find our interview with Associate Professor at Columbia Business School, author of The Secret Life of Secrets, Michael Slepian, who was kind enough to answer a few of Bored Panda’s questions on keeping secrets from parents.

#1

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know When you guys went to Hawaii I put Milo (cat) down. He was sick, in incredible pain, couldn't eat or drink, couldn't even move to get to the litterbox. When you left on vacation he was too weak to even yowl in pain anymore. I couldn't stand to see that cat in so much pain and so afraid so I did the only thing I could do to help him- end his life humanely.

My parents were 100% against putting down a pet regardless of how much it is suffering so they'd be beyond mad if they knew this.

anon , Louis Droege / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

#2

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know (creating a throwaway since this is a little personal) That my little brother's car accident was a s*icide. My teenage brother had been struggling with OCD and social anxiety for awhile. It was something all of our siblings had dealt with growing up, but it was especially hard on him since the rest of us had moved away from our hometown years ago. Everyone wondered how it could have happened, and they just assumed that he was skipping class since he hated going to school. But I was the one who found the letter after his funeral, and instead of showing it to anyone I just got rid of it and covered up all the evidence (think search history of "fatal car crashes") The reason I didn't show them is because my dad used to be an alcoholic when we were much younger. The only reason he stopped drinking is because my mother threatened to divorce him and take us away, and he's been sober for almost 15 years now because of it. Also, at the time my mother was fighting stage II breast cancer, and was bedridden and ill with chemo during everything. My father was very attached to our youngest sibling, and they were devastated enough that I had to stay with them for several weeks after to make sure they would be fine. The possibility that my father could have been driven back to drinking, and potentially destroy my family further made my choice for me. No one knows but me and my therapist, and no one else will ever know. I made this decision for them, and I've accepted that its something I will have to carry for the rest of my life. It still hurts sometimes though.

_thisismythrowaway__ , Eli Solitas / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#3

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know I searched Craigslist for "free kittens" and drove 1.5hrs to some podunk trailer home in the sticks to adopt a 5 week old kitten. I told my parents that my sister and I had found him outside of Burger King's trash bins. Three years later and he's still my boy, but my parents would flip out if they knew the truth.

mfchipley , Tran Mau Tri Tam / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Jay Scales
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You still rescued him - just from a different place. They don't need to know :)

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

It’s no surprise that people’s secrets tend to change quite significantly with age, ranging from keeping a stash of candy hidden away at the age of 9 to keeping certain illnesses a secret at the age of 39, for instance, so family members don’t get sick with worry.

In a piece for the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, Michael Slepian suggested that as many as “97% of people are keeping a significant secret at any given time, with the average person having about 13 secrets”, and added that children develop the ability to keep secrets at around the age of five.

#4

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know While at work i faked an athsma attack to get out of work early. Mom took me to urgent care center after the inhaler "didnt help" . . . the docs ran an EKG and found something peculiar, after a breathing treatment they advised that i follow up with a cardiologist and sent me home. Fast forward 3 months and countless doctors and specialists and we discovered that i have a hole in my heart that requires open heart surgery. yup, a lie to skip out on work saved my life.

DIS_IS_GARBAGE , Sincerely Media / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
StrangeOne
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. Sometimes BSing can pay off. But please don't make it a habit to fake asthma. It makes it harder for others with actual asthma to be believed.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#5

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That many years ago I've found that cigarette pack in your drawer, dad.

I'll never tell anyone that you smoke once in a while when life is too much to handle, maybe when your 38-year-old patient dies of heart attack, or when a mother of three gets a very bad skin cancer, or when your daughter is depressed and seems to have lost any will to live. You've been good enough to stop smoking 20 smokes a day after thirty years of killer habit, and I'm proud of you.

I can never tell you because you always want to be perfect in our eyes. You're not perfect but you still are a great doctor and a great dad. Thank you.

sorrytosaythat , Ander Burdain / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

#6

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know I was 10-ish and my dad had just painted the boiler room door orange in our basement. My younger brother and I were pushing each other around on a skatebaord in basement and my dad warned us, don't you dare hit this door with your skateboard. 15 minutes later I'm picking my brother up from the ground and looking at a hole in my dad's orange door caused by said skateboard. Definitely not telling dad. Instead I grab a piece of orange construction paper and a glue stick to "patch" the hole. It matched surprisingly well. 27 years later that construction paper is still holding strong and I have never heard a word about it from my pop.

FerDaLuvaGawd , FerDaLuvaGawd Report

ADVERTISEMENT

Discussing the topic with Bored Panda, Slepian pointed out that in their early years, kids' secrets often deal with not only accidents and messes, but also mischief. “During the toilet training years, this often includes wetting their pants or the bed. These kinds of secrets are normal and inconsequential (except for having to clean up).

“Secrecy becomes a problem when children keep their struggles secret,” the secrecy expert continued. “If a child is struggling at school, with a substance, or with mental health, keeping the secret works against getting the very help that they need. If the secret deals with something smaller, a private possession or a secret joy, this is a normal part of childhood development, carving out a domain that separates oneself from one's parents and family.”

#7

So, when I was 6 or 7 we had Christmas with the extended family. One of my uncle's was there, and I was always a bit afraid of him because he had done some time for a d**g charge and just gotten out within the last year or two.

Anyway, I walk into the kitchen at one point, and he is there with this giant wedge of cheese. He looks up and asks if I wanted any. I nod, because I f*****g loved cheese. He says "ok, but you cannot tell your parents because you'll ruin your dinner they will get mad at me" and he slices me a few pieces. We eat in silence and then I leave, convinced that I was an accomplice in some terrible act with my ex-con uncle. To this day, I have never told my parents.

As to what would happen if they found out, well, then they would know that the reason I didn't eat that one Christmas dinner in the early 90s was because I had already filled up on expensive cheese.

JaJH Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#8

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That I'm gay as f**k, family's homophobic.
I'm only 16 at the time and plan to come out when I turn 18.

lolipop69 , Alexander Grey / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Blood is thicker than homophobia. It's 2024, we should have gotten further. Nobody should have to suffer for being gay.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#9

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know My address. My parents are psychotic.

anon , Mansur Omar / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Nea
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents are my home. Cant imagine how hard it must be to have parents you wanna run away from.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Needless to say, opening up to anyone can be difficult, let alone to a mom or a dad, who are usually the people in charge of disciplining the offspring. However, fostering an honest relationship and being supportive can help kids open up to their parents easier.

“Angry outbursts and cruel punishments in response to disclosures may close the door on future confessions,” Slepian pointed out. “But when children believe that their parents will express understanding and compassion, they will be more likely to disclose, confide, and ask for help when they need it.”

#10

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know This will come too late to ever be seen.

That I was homeless for more than two years. During the recession from 2008 to some time in 2010, I lost my job, and eventually was kicked out of my apartment. I had a 10-year old car that was paid off, so I lived out of that until I found a series of jobs cleaning houses, working in a recreational center part time.

Parents lived 1,000 miles away and I managed to keep a mailing address at a friend's so they never realized. It would have killed them that I didn't want to ask for help, I wanted to do it on my own.

anon , Ev / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#11

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know Well, im a 20 years old son of a muslim family living in a western country. I am gay. The only reason I moved out into my own appartment was because I have a boyfriend. My mother knows I'm gay but says its a sin and doesnt wanna talk with me anymore until I go "straight" again, my father does not know, he would probably k*ll me If he knew :/ But I enjoy every minute with my boyfriend and I dont give a f**k about my parents.

doesntreallymatteryo , Honey Fangs / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Nea
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Its the most distressful thing when you have to fight your own parents. Rest of the world is fine.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#13

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know After my sis died I locked myself in her room and went through everything alone before her friends or my parents went through her stuff to pack it away or give it to her friends. I found naked pics, empty bottles of alcohol and a letter she had wrote, but I guess never gave, to her then boyfriend telling him the story of how she was r*ped as a younger teenager. I threw everything like that out but kept that letter. It's been 12 years and I just found the letter again as I was packing up to make room for baby. I can't bring myself to throw it away.

hotsy__totsy , Jonathan Borba / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my youngest brother suddenly died, I did a lot of editing in his effects, too. Nothing bad - just stuff he would have wanted kept private.

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#14

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know When I was in elementary school, I was at Target with my mom and sister. At the checkout counter I saw these cinnamon flavored tic-tacs, and I had to have them, because I hadn't fully developed the whole want/need function in my brain. I knew my mom wouldn't buy them for me, so I grabbed them (sneakily), and put them in my pocket (sneakily).

I felt pretty guilty the whole way home, and didn't make eye contact with anyone in case they could read my mind.

As soon as I was inside the safety of my home, I made my way upstairs (sneakily), and opened my hot goods.

They were awful.

Easily my least favorite tic-tac. I ended up throwing them in the garbage can outside (sneakily) to avoid any suspicion.

This is my shame, and I carry it alone. Except now with theoretically thousands of people.

TLDR: The only time I ever stole anything, the fruits of my victory turned rotten in my mouth.

ThatGuyIsTall , the cazpian / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
BC
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was fourteen I shoplifted a mars bar. Don’t even like them. Once I was home I bawled my eyes out all night. Ate the evidence. Went into the milk bar the next day, put $1 on the counter, and ran away. Never got rid of the shame… (thanks for listening.)

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#15

I was molested as a child by a babysitter 10 years older than I. My parents where trying to help her out because she was having issues in her abusive home. Her father was tossed in jail. This went on from what I can remember for at least two years. I was 4-5years old. I didn't tell anyone... until I stated dating at 14. My parents do not know because.. A. They were trying to help her, and I felt sorry for her. (I realize that her hurting me voids this, but for a preschoolers mind it didn't work that way.) B. By the time I felt I could say something, so much time had passed that all I could see happening was me hurting my parents, making them blame themselves. Why do that? I see this person from time to time in passing at the supermarket, we have mutual acquaintances. People bring her up. That bothers me, I don't care what is happening in her life. I think she was going though some f****d up s**t and passed it on. I feel sorry for her. When I see her I look her in the eye and stand strong. Almost to say "You know what you did and I am not broken because of it."

curlysuethrowaway Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a sad sad text. It just shows that a horrible experience seldom stops at one experience. It destroys more than the victims life

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#16

I am a swinger.

A funny thing is, a lot of non-swingers who know this about me ask, "how did you come out to your parents?". WHY THE HELL WOULD I EVER COME OUT TO MY PARENTS. It's not like being gay, where I would eventually introduce them to my significant other, so they would have to know. This would be more comparable to telling your parents that you're into a**l. They really don't need to know.

i_am_sexbot Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly. Your sexual preferences are yours to keep and yours to tell. How you have sex is none of their business.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#17

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know One time a dropped an entire roll of toilet paper into the bowl when trying to change it. I didn't want them to know I ruined an entire roll so I hid it in my closet and over a course of a few weeks I would rip away pieces and throw them away.

Edit: Since some people seem to be assuming my parents were horrible and I was frightened, that's definitely not the case. I was just a dumb kid that was embarrassed about dropping a whole roll in the toilet.

SamePotato , Clay Banks / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#18

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know The fact that I had a child and gave it up for adoption.

She hates my wife. Almost had me convinced to leave her, but I couldn't do it. When I went back to my wife, the last thing my mother said to me was, "Don't get her pregnant or she has you trapped forever!"

Doing the math, our child was conceived the very first day I came home.

We never wanted kids. It was never in our plan. We're both irresponsible and broke as s**t, with lots of emotional baggage from growing up in broken homes with criminal parents. We agreed that we'd never put a child through that.

Due to my wife's build, health conditions, and very irregular cycles, we did not discover she was pregnant until 7.5 months in, far too late to terminate. In one of the hardest moves of our lives, we placed our child for adoption with an incredible couple who wanted nothing more out of life than to raise a child.

She'll never know about it. Nothing good could possibly come from it.

christwhatamess , Luma Pimentel / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Raven DeathShade
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You did the right thing by your kid, nothing great would've happened if you had kept it.

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#19

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know I'm pretty sure the statute of limitations are up on this one, so why not.

I was a Jr. in High School, and had some friends into LAN parties who were seniors. But I couldn't really join them because my family was pretty poor and neither them or I could afford a computer for me to use at that time. So one day my older friends gave me one of their older PCs (Pentium 3) with a couple parts missing (RAM, HDD) that I could build out for myself. Now about 15 years later its turned out to be a great jumping off point because now I'm a successful System Administrator and love working in the IT field. And I owe it in many ways to that first computer I learned to build back up from scratch and make my own.

Only they didn't give me that computer. We stole it from the high school. Sorry not sorry.

FunkyFireStarter , Matt Mech / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Now that you're making reasonable money, buy some new computer equipment for your old high school to even things out. You kinda owe them.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#20

When I was like 11, I wanted to get out of school the next day, so on the way home from a superbowl party with my mom I started acting like my stomach hurt , she said she'd give me something at home for my stomachache. Knowing this wouldn't get me out of school, I started fake crying and said it really really hurts, by this time we were already in the driveway of our apartment, she looked at me and said I'm gonna take you to the hospital but if your faking ,I'm gonna beat your a*s! (mexican household ), so I stuck to my story and continued sobbing and saying it hurts, we get to the hospital and they don't know what's wrong with me so they wanna do a cat scan of me, my mom agrees and off I go, after the scan the doctor told us he thinks my appendix looked a little inflamed and that was probably the reason for the pain(I literally had no pain or discomfort anywhere ) and that they wanted to remove it which means surgery , my heart sank at the news, but I knew I couldn't confess now I was to deep. So they schedule the surgery for the next morning , the morning comes and about half my family is there for support and prayer.im super f*****g nervous at this point so when the nurse gave me a shot on my butt cheek I accidentally tensed up and felt one of the worst pains of my life , they take me into surgery and everything thing went fine,the surgeon even came to recovery and showed me my appendix which was awesome! I stayed in the hospital for about a day then I went home but before that the doc told my mom I couldn't go back to school for about two weeks while cuts healed which was also awesome! Even better my church royal ranger group visited me at my house and brought me this big basket filled with snacks and candy. It was the best two weeks of my life, my mom made my brother get me what I wanted cuz she didn't want me moving around ,I just played video games the entire two weeks,then I had to go back to school.

I'm 22 now and have not told a soul I was faking being sick, I like to think of it as one of my greatest achievements. The end....sorry ma.

TL:DR- faked being sick and went into surgery just to get out of school.

anon Report

Add photo comments
POST
Jorge Gonzalez
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But if it is borderline on the scan the deciding factor to operate was OP's stated pain. Otherwise they might have decided to keep him in observation.

Load More Replies...
Jess Smith
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First work (above at the time of writing), now school...people will fake illnesses to get out of lots of stuff. (edit: clarifying)

Karina
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We are so used to ignoring our symptoms and people telling us that we are fine' from young age that we dont see what is right infront of us. Most kids dont break down crying for thst long unless something is wrong on a "system level". This is probably his body shaking for help. Most kids are more afraid of being put under and being cut open than their mother. I think all of these, pluss the doctor saying it looked a bit inflammed, means he was really sick, but didnt have the experience or mind-body connection to recognize it.

Jinx (she/her)
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But you actually were sick, you even state you began to feel real pain before they knocked you out. I once also faked sick but turned out to actually be sick by sheer coincidence

Upstaged75
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think they were saying the shot hurt so much because they tensed up.

Load More Replies...
View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#21

I was brought up in a pretty religious home...
My family had me in theatre, choir, youth group, and all kinds of other extra-curricular activities to "keep me out of trouble", so they trusted me pretty well.

One night (I was about 15) my boyfriend at the time had come over to watch movies. The stipulation was that we could lay in the bed and watch the movie, but the door had to be open. After a while, my mom came in to check on us and everything was fine, so she thanked my boyfriend for being a gentleman and shut the door on her way out.

Immediately, as if the door shut had triggered some teenage hormone overload, we started making out and fooling around. He slid his hand up my shirt for a bit, but finally having some privacy, I soon directed his hand to my netherbits. Yay first (not self stimulated) orgasm!

We never got caught, which was considered a major triumph, and we found ways after that to hook up without my parents knowing.

It wasn't until a few months later at my youth's "Purity Ball"...yes, we signed pledges and wore rings to signify our abstinence for God and marriage...that my dad delivered this humiliating speech.

He told the congregation he was proud of the strong lady I had become. That regardless of having a boyfriend, I stood up to teen peer pressure and hormones, and that he witnessed me deflect an attempt at immoral behavior while watching movies with my boyfriend one night...

Apparently, the blinds had been open and my bed faced them from in the house. He happened to be walking in from the garage and caught a peek at me removing my boyfriend's hand from my boob.

I was mortified. The secret he must never know? The night I got my first orgasm, he thought I deflected my boyfriend from touching my boobs, when in reality I was actually directing him much much further south.

**TLDR: Dad thought I was sitting on the bench for God, when I was really rounding second with David.**.

StopItJeca Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Young people need to discover their sexuality. They don't need to be forced into abstinence. Just make sure they use protection and don't have kids before they can give them a safe childhood. Where I come from, everyone over the age of 15 can decide over their own sexuality and noone, not even their parents has any right to interfere.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#22

That I'm planning on eloping in Disney in just a few months. My fiancé and I don't want to deal with the stress of a big wedding or my family.

breakyourwings Report

#23

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That I eat meat. Both of my parents are devout Hindus so if that got leaked it would be really f*****g bad. Specifically that I f*****g love steak and burgers. I'm pretty sure they would cut me off socially and financially.

cptsexpanther , José Ignacio Pompé / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

#24

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know I can never tell them that my #1 goal as a parent is to handle relationship issues differently than they did. They went through an extremely messy divorce when I was 8 and my only memory of them together is them screaming at each other and my sister and I hiding in our rooms. Then it was 10+ years of them talking s**t about each other to us, putting us in the middle of all their arguments, and giving us a hug e guilt trip whenever they felt like we were spending more time with the other one than with them. It's been 20 years now and my mom will STILL talk s**t about my dad and stepmom every once in awhile, despite me asking her over and over to stop. I am happily married but if I were to ever get divorced I will never put my daughter in the middle of arguments, speak badly about her father to her, or make her feel guilty for having a relationship with him. It's the #1 thing I learned from my parents and I think they would be devastated to realize the true effect it has had on me.

anon , Ioann-Mark Kuznietsov / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#25

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know I'm in love with a black girl and my parents are mild racists. I'm waiting to save enough money to move out with her because I know when I break the news I'll be kicked out. I'm 23 so I guess this is good timing to move out anyways. It really sucks.

Pram75 , Smart Araromi / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Alexandra
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

'Mild racists'? I didn't know racists came in different flavours. Personally, I would compare it to being pregnant: you either are or you aren't. You can't be 'mildly' pregnant, just as you can't be 'mildly' racist. You are or you aren't. That's it, no sugar-coating.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#26

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That I was the one that blew up the toilet. To this day my stepdad thinks someone broke into my house, smashed the toilet, and left.

Melissajoanshart , Giorgio Trovato / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Ace
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, of course he believes that. Reader: he does not believe that.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#27

My sister and I were reading through my mom's old high school yearbook, and we kept seeing everyone sign saying something along the lines of, "Congrats, you and X are perfect together!" X is not our dad, and we had never heard X's name mentioned before. After a little more digging we found out she had married X right out of high school, divorced, then married our father. Neither of us really cared, but it was still a huge shock she hasn't told us now that we're both in our mid twenties.

thelarge1 Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Years after they both had passed on, we found out that my mom had not been my dad's first fiancée. He was engaged before, but his mother chased her away. We have to laugh when we think about her trying to do that with our mother. Not a person you could chase off from anywhere.

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#28

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know Replaced bourbon from a priceless bottle of liquor with Evan Williams when I was 15. I found out later my parents were saving the bottle for their 50th Anniversary. It was given to them by my great grandpa at their wedding. Still have 23 years to break the news.

anon , Eva Bronzini / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

#29

My parents are massive anti-military hippies. They don't know I was an officer in the United States Navy. Six years. Fortunately my parents aren't facebook parents, so I had enough time that I could edit posts and pictures my friends posted so they didn't show up to family. I told them I had a busy job, or a girlfriend or whatever to avoid going home for the holidays.

I'm extremely surprised I pulled it off.

anon Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What you think of what your government does with the military can be very different from what you think of those who serve in it.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#30

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know It was me who superglued the fridge shut. I just blamed it on my brother.

anon , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Continue reading with Bored Panda Premium
Unlimited content
Ad-free browsing
Dark mode
ADVERTISEMENT
#31

That the reason I have such low self esteem is because they always berate me and make fun of me.

traheidda Report

#32

My freshman year of college my parents got notified that I had been essentially issued a slap on the wrist for drinking. They dont know that it was because I had just woke up from a sorority house flower bed (I think) and was walking the opposite way from my dorm at 3 am in jorts, boots and a mullet wig with a Texas flag cape.

generictexan Report

#33

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That party I threw in high school when you guys were out of town for the weekend that you found out about due to my snitch a*s neighbors, wasn't just "some guys drinking beer and playing poker" it was actually an e*stasy fueled orgy.. and yes your bed was used.

90s_Dad_D**k , Matheus Frade / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#34

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know That I'm bisexual. Apparently bi people will just 'duck' everything that moves according to my dad. I would get disowned.

bibeauty , Alexander Grey / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Move something at me with sufficient velocity, dad, and I will duck too.

#35

When I got engaged, my very Catholic mother whispered to me "has he tried to kiss you yet?"

I'm a semi-famous dominatrix, and have been since three years before she asked that question.

misskinky Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same when me and a friend was going to a bdsm party and her entire family came home. We stood there in bdsm gear and her sister worried that someone might pinch her bum in such a short skirt.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#36

How bad my depression and anxiety are.

We figured out what was up with me a few years ago, and it runs in my family. Having seen it in my dad, and being a nurse herself, my mom put me on antidepressants and whatnot so they know it's a lingering thing. What they don't know is that I think about suicide every day, and that my anxiety makes me push myself away from any SO I get close to. I use alcohol, pot, and prescription d***s to make every day life a little more bareable. Right now, I just hope I make it another 5 years, and we'll see what happens then.

ivelostmyway Report

Add photo comments
POST
Denise
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Talk to someone. You need help with this more than you realize.

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#37

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know My mom read through my Facebook messages and found out that I had sex with 3 people. She called me a s**t for years after.

She never needs to know what that number actually is.

OwnedByAVizala , Joshua Hoehne / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a horrible mom. This kind of behaviour prevents feminism from succeeding and it often comes from other women. That's why both men and women are needed to make a change. And not just supporting feminism. Be feminists. Men can and should be feminists. If it scares you, read up on what feminism means. Hint. It's about equal rights. It's not a man vs woman thing. It's about everyone being equal, and that's something worth fighting for. Rant over.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#38

That I use to sneak into sister bedroom after bedtime and play game boy with her. God I felt like such a ninja.

Banana4monkey12 Report

Add photo comments
POST
Heffalump
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Better than even chance they knew and turned a blind eye. Nothing behaves better than a child that thinks they just got away with something and isn't about to push it.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#39

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know When I was younger I read in my mom's journal that she had an abortion before she was pregnant with me. She doesn't know that I know, and I'm not sure how she would react. I'm just glad they decided to keep the second pregnancy.

anon , Jess Bailey / unspalsh (not the actual photo) Report

Add photo comments
POST
Penny Hernandez
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Our paternal grandfather was a doctor. When my sister was living at his house he told her that before our parents were married he'd terminated our mother's first pregnancy. (Both my sister and I think that he told her about this was just plain mean. It was nothing we needed to know.)

View more commentsArrow down menu
#40

That I didn't get laid off from a really good job my dad once got me. I got fired for f*****g one of the office girls in the bathroom and was caught by the CEO.

shitterplug Report

ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#41

My dad thinks I lost my virginity earlier than I actually did. He thought he'd walked in on me post-sex with my gf at the time, but we'd actually just been play fighting, and the moment he walked in was the moment she decided to put the strap for her top back on her shoulder. After that I find out my dads told half of my family about this, and despite me trying to tell him I hadn't done anything, he claimed to have believed me, but didn't.

So he'll never know when I actually did, because he believes a lie

EDIT: I was 17/18 when the play fight happened. I lost my virgin some years later in my early 20s.

thatguy454 Report

#42

Probably my religious views (or lack thereof).

himynameislloyd Report

#43

This happened in my freshman year of high school.
So one of my friends got ahold of some weed , and i haven't tried it before so we had the stupid idea to smoke it. He came over along with some other friends of mine. The original plan was to go to forest near my house to smoke it, but it was cold so we didn't want to. One of us wanted to smoke it on my porch , but I disagreed. I forgot how , but we came up with the stupidest idea and HOTBOX in my bathroom. Keep in mind my parents were gonna be home from work in an hour, and if they found out my life would be done. We quickly made a s****y bong out of a Gatorade bottle , then removed everything from my bathroom. We lit up the weed and smoked for like 10 minutes. Once we were done we quickly cleaned up and emptied a whole Axe bottle in the bathroom. My friends being stoned as f**k left. I went back upstairs to check the bathroom and it smelled like flat out weed. I tried to use every possible thing to get the smell out but it didn't work. I called my parents (they have the same job) and they said they were 15 minutes away. I knew I was f****d. Now keep in mind my parents are EXTREMELY strict an if they caught me I would be over. This is when I thought of the stupidest thing any sane human would think. Burn my bathroom down. I ended up lighting some towels on fire and trying my hardest to burn the sink area. It ended up catching on fire but it was slow. I quickly called 911 and 3 minutes later fire department i see firetrucks out my house. They took care of the fire and my parents came home shocked. Half of my bathroom was charred and the door knocked down. Fire department said it was probably an electrical current from the outlet that burned a towel. I slept that night thinking how stupid I was and what I just did. To this day my parents don't know..

TL:DR - hotboxed in my bathroom and set fire to it to get the smell out and prevent from being caught. Parent still think it was an accident...

throwaway_donthotbox Report

Add photo comments
POST
LaserBrain
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well it worked! But that's what you get when you criminalise or stigmatise weed

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#44

I crossdress.

For context, I had talked to my parents for consult about my interest in becoming trans (MtF), and they literally just shut me out from everything. Like, no internet, no school, I couldn't even talk to friends or family until they somehow killed any remote feelings for it. It took a week of home bootcamping on why no one would ever accept a transgender, not even my parents, and how I would be alone for the rest of my life. Now I can't own anything that has a girl remotely in it otherwise my parents will think I'm contaminated again.

After a year of a bit of self-discovery, I just found out that I like pretending to be a girl with a penis. So I got that going for me.

YourTsundere Report

Add photo comments
POST
Ace
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel for you. That's a terrible thing to have happened, I hope you find a way to work it out.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#45

When I told them that I was sleeping over at my friend's house for 3 days and that we had a lot of activities planned out in celebration of our successes in our exams, I actually went to Barcelona then France then Italy.

Jawadd12 Report

Add photo comments
POST
Krizzy Wilde
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This could definitely happen if you live in Europe, I once went to France and Germany within a space of 24 hours from the UK, didn't see much of either country but it's definitely possible to do

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#46

I spent the night in jail for possession of Marijuana five years ago. Not a big deal really but it would kill my mom if she found out I have been in a jail cell.

JohnBunzel Report

Add photo comments
POST
#47

I totaled my first car when I was 16. They knew about that. They came to pick me up and talked to the police officer while I was moving things from my car to theirs. What they didn't know about was the liter of vodka in my trunk. Which I quickly and quietly speed walked to my parents trunk. Neither the cop nor my parents knew a thing. I very nearly sh*t my pants. (Disclaimer: I did not drink and drive. The trunk was just the only place my parents never checked and I happened to be a rowdy teenager).

monsterlife17 Report

Add photo comments
POST
#48

When we were staying at a friend's place on holiday, my SO and I accidentally broke her guest bed. Like, one of the legs gave way and the whole thing collapsed. It was an ultra-cheap metal frame and SO found a meat cleaver and we banged the bejeesus out of that bed to get it back into shape, to no avail. I had to ring my friend and confess.

Due to the conservative nature of my parents and their firm beliefs, we have allowed them to believe that we are chaste and good and would never actually have SEX, euw gross. We haven't lied, but we have certainly been guilty of omission.

We are getting married this year, and my friend with the broken bed is a bridesmaid, and is working on her speech...

went_to_sea Report

Add photo comments
POST
Sunny Day
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You little rascals! Well, I hope you learned your lesson - no more jumping on beds!

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#49

I'm not that close to my parents, but as an adult I'm a lot mellower and recognize the fact that they're nice people who did their best.

So, there's nothing that would be catastrophic for *me* if they found it out, but I'd be a little glum about the unecessary trauma it'd put them through if they ever found out how many people I've slept with, how many of them were dudes, or the sheer quantity of d***s I did at one point.

badass_panda Report

#50

My time in Iraq and what happened.

blanchattacks Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your parents don't need to know, but it might help you if you found someone to tell.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#51

30 Secrets These People Make Sure Their Parents Will Never Know When I was about 11 or 12 I was going through my pyromaniac stage. One Saturday, I decided I would grab a steel can and fill it with Gasoline and head to the woods. Now, this wasnt just your typical ol' can of spegetti-O's, this was a 1 gallon bulk sized can...filled to the brim. I took it to the woods and decided it would be cool just to light it on fire and see what would happen. I lit it and it caught like I expected and kept burning inside the can. After about 15mins I got bored and went to try and put it out. In the process, I knocked the can over spreading gasoline all over the forest floor and it erupted in a ball of flame. I quickly ran back to my house to get water and I come running back with about 5 gallons. By this point the fire had spread tremendously and my efforts were useless. I decided my best bet would be to run inside and play video games. Luckily this spot in the woods was pretty good ways away from my parents house so it didnt draw my parents attention immediately. After about an hour or so, the entire fire department is on scene battling the 3-4acres of forest fire that is roaring. There was a road that runs behind my house and the fire basically engulfed all of the forest separating my parents house and this road. This road is notorious for d**g dealers and meth houses. While the firefighters are trying to battle the flames, it is discovered that the house closest to the fire is a rather large cook house and cops show up and a huge bust goes down. Naturally, the fire was blamed on them and my parents just accepted that. It is now 20 years later and my parents still do not know nor will they ever know. **TL;DR Set fire to 3-4acres of woods. M*th house got blamed. Parents will NEVER know.

IxJAXZxI , Devin Avery / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#53

This may be a little more serious than most of the other replies I'm seeing. But, I can never ever let my parents know how many times I've been sexually assaulted. It would absolutely destroy my relationship with them, and they would never look at me the same way. I feel that my father would blame me for them, and think much less of me. And my mother would just see me as a victim from then on, and likely develop some sort of guilt complex because she'd think she had done something wrong that I ended up in those situations. I say this here on reddit only because it's nice to mention it to somebody.

anon Report

Add photo comments
POST
BoredPossum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How horrible. They are the ones whose job it is to support and comfort you. I hope you're doing better now.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#54

I signed a lease for an apartment in Florida before I came back home from my internship down at Disney. I came back home and never went back down. I paid for it for a year. My roommates wouldn't let me have someone sublease. It was a horrible situation and I f****d up. I don't need to hear it from my parents on how stupid and young I was.. oy.

killinglyy Report

Add photo comments
POST
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#55

All the d***s I've tried, or rather, how many times I've 'tried' them. They know I tried some s**t and I know they tried some s**t, but I'd like to keep it vague. Why? Cause my mom is always worried about me, and she can't help it.

BonefacioBaldButt Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are several very different meaning possible in this post depending how you fill in the asterisks. Sort of like Bored Panda Madlibs.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#56

How much sex I had in their house between Sophomore year and Junior year of high school. They know I have had a lot of sex there over the past 5 years with my now fiancee (we are 25) but I think they would be mortified how much I used that basement for porking my HS girlfriend.

enjoytheshow Report

Add photo comments
POST
Dainty72
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope you grow up soon, because your interpretation of having sex is so childish considering you're engaged

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#57

I was a cam girl for a while. also my first "boyfriend" was a predator. not in the fun alien way.

anon Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#58

That i lost my virginity when I was 15, they think I was 18, and I don't have the heart to correct the mistake.

apricity3425 Report

Add photo comments
POST
Michael Largey
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I lost my virginity at 18. Unfortunately, it grew back when I was 23 and hung around for ten years.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#59

When I was 8 me and my sister cracked my dads chess board. We hid the pieces in someone else's trash can. My Dad has had it since he was 11 he was 46 at the time and he was fuming mad. He thought he lost it, and he still does.

Histo12 Report

Add photo comments
POST
Brian Droste
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Should have e tried to fine another chess set or board exactly like the one he had and replace the board.

#60

My sister, step-brother, and I are all adults now, ranging from mid-twenties to early-thirties. I was the oldest, so I had already moved out by the time my sister was a teenager. We were all out to dinner with our parents recently, exchanging funny stories back and forth. Then this came up: Step-brother (to my sister): I guess we're all old enough for this story now. So, remember how you would call me to see if our parents were awake yet? Sister: We are NOT old enough for that story! That's where it ended, but I assume my sister was sneaking out at night and calling my step-brother in the morning to see if it was safe to sneak back in...and despite being in her late twenties now, still doesn't want my parents to know about it.

anon Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#61

How much I've spent on magic cards. I would be skinned alive.

randomgrunt1 Report

#62

I used something before I was of legal age. A lot. And it was not alcohol or tobacco.

VeryTalentedArtist Report

Add photo comments
POST
BebeR
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Found answer on the Reddit comments: OP drove a car.......... -_-

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#63

Everything and anything I do on my computer.

anon Report

Add photo comments
POST
#64

The window I closed wasn't really a pop up...

PokeHehe Report

#65

I vape. The generations before my parents mostly died because of smoking. Even if vaping is safer, the act of inhaling smoke just scares them.

NoojieWoojie Report

Add photo comments
POST
Alexandra
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Vaping is not safer: the substances used cause damage to brain and heart. If you thing it's safer, you're deluding yourself.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT