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50 IT Jokes That Techies Might Find Painfully Relatable

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If once artists were a group of people shrouded in mystery on their summit of wit, exclusiveness, and importance, then as of recently, the tables have drastically turned. Now, it’s the chic IT guys and gals that have taken the position of mystique, and not without reason. See, our lives are undeniably turning tech, and, first of all, we need someone to make it all techy. Secondly - without the IT professionals to explain stuff, the codes and such are just a bunch of meaningless numbers taking us nowhere, leaving us stumped. Yet, as discussed a couple of times before, those in the unknown tend to make fun of the things they do not comprehend, to make them look less ethereal and more earthly. Exactly because of that, there are plenty of IT jokes trying to explain the purpose and the magic of IT to those dimwitted on the subject while making the professionals look down on us with a sparkle of amusement in their glimmering wise eyes.

Sure, as with anything that’s made out of cogs and gears, even if imaginable, IT things are bound to break, and it is even folklore of a kind mentioning crashing websites, apps, and the disasters that are printer machines. Yes, we’re adding printers to our IT category since someone still had to program them. Of course, the bigger the failure, the more funny IT jokes you can milk out of the situation. So, there you have it; everything in life can be funny, it’s only a matter of an unexpected failure, a misunderstanding, or a case of complete ignorance.

Without ruminating on our thoughts about the importance of technology and where the roots of fun are, let’s just scroll down below to the best jokes we could find, shall we? Once you’re finished reading them, give them an evaluation on a decimal scale and share these silly jokes with your friends and your foes.

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#1

IT Joke about never seeing a fax machine before We just got a fax. At work. We didn't know we had a fax machine. The entire department just stared at it. I poked it with a stick.

370points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

I am literally crying-laughing right now! Imagination STAHP!

47points

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#2

If someone from the 1950s suddenly appeared, what would be the most difficult thing to explain about life today?
One answer: “I possess a device in my pocket that is capable of accessing the entirety of information known to man. I use it to look at pictures of cats and get into arguments with strangers.”

325points

Celeste 2 years ago

#Facts

33points

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#3

What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
"I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions."

314points

Pezor Zass 2 years ago

In my job i have to send out information to students that's not exactly technical, but makes you pay attention to get it properly. It's super obvious that most students glance at it and move on, and i blame all the T&Cs that we all ignore for it. Sometimes you actually have to read all the words or bad things will happen, folks.

31points

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#4

I was setting a voice recognition password for my new phone and a nearby dog barked and ran away. Now I am still looking for the dog to unlock my phone.

274points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

😂😂😂😂😂

47points

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#5

I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says, “The Titanic is syncing.”

267points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

**snort**

56points

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#6

IT Joke about getting your WiFi hacked "Yesterday I decided to change my WiFi name to "Hack me if you can" and when I woke up this morning I saw the name changed to "Challenge accepted" somebody help."

255points

Christopher Moncur 2 years ago

rip

32points

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#7

Where's the best place to hide a body?
Page two of Google Search.

243points

QibliOfTheSandWings 2 years ago

But what if the cops become desperate for the answer?

31points

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#8

Password looks at itself in the mirror:
"Don't listen to Google. You are a strong, confident password."

235points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

And then you see those one time auto generated passwords with 30 assorted symbols, letters, and numbers, and realize that for all your strength and confidence, you cannot win against such power.

42points

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#9

Autocorrect has become my worst enema.

229points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

That is so turtle.

101points

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#10

Set your wifi password to 2444666668888888. So when someone asks for it, tell them it's 12345678.

228points

Jacob Nunez 2 years ago

I’m gonna use this one

40points

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#11

IT Joke about never closing unused browser tabs "Happy 3 week anniversary to the 26 browser tabs I have open."

221points

Ragnhild Nilsen 2 years ago

Only three weeks? I believe I have at least five that are a year old. 30 tabs right now

61points

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#12

"I’ve given up social media for the New Year and am trying to make friends outside Facebook while applying the same principles. Every day, I walk down the street and tell passersby what I’ve eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and me gardening. I also listen to their conversations and tell them I love them. And it works. I already have three people following me—two police officers and a psychiatrist."

219points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

More people need to remember that anything known by more than one person is NOT a secret.

27points

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#13

I wish people were like Internet videos and you could tap them lightly to see a clock of how much longer they’re going to be talking.

211points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Is MUTE an option as well?

74points

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#14

"I tried to explain to a client why I couldn’t help him with a project that was written in a program code that I didn’t know. “Let’s say you’re asking me to write something in a specific language. Now, I’m fluent in English and Spanish, but your project is in Chinese. Since I don’t understand Chinese, I’m not your best option. You need someone who is fluent in this specific language. See?” He said he did and thanked me. The next morning, I got a call from another developer asking, “Why is your client asking us if we’re fluent in Chinese?”

187points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

Not everyone understands the concept of a simile.

54points

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#15

Whoever said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results has obviously never had to reboot a computer.

178points

Valerie G. 2 years ago (edited)

It’s been attributed to all sorts of people: Benjamin Franklin, Mark Twain, Confucius, an old Chinese proverb, and most famously Albert Einstein, but there is little to no proof that any of them ever said such a thing.

14points

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#16

IT joke about iPhone Chargers Why are iPhone chargers not called Apple Juice?!

173points

Terry Tobias 2 years ago

That would make sense! Lol!

29points

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#17

The cool part about naming your kid is you don’t have to add six numbers to make sure the name is available.

167points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Elon disagrees

79points

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#18

"My email password has been hacked. That's the third time I've had to rename the cat."

164points

QibliOfTheSandWings 2 years ago

Poor cat! 😂

25points

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#19

If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer... Oh wait, he does.

162points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

Would it be cruel to make someone's wallpaper a screenshot of the Blue Screen of Death?

55points

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#20

I told the kids I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. So they unplugged my computer and threw out my wine.

161points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

Oh, no!!! 😱

29points

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#21

IT Joke about predictive text ruining the message The guy who invented predictive text died last night. His funfair is next monkey.

154points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

Let us moon his pissing.

113points

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#22

"I was in a couple’s home trying to fix their Internet connection. The husband called out to his wife in the other room for the computer password. “Start with a capital S, then 123,” she shouted back. We tried S123 several times, but it didn’t work. So we called the wife in. As she input the password, she muttered, “I really don’t know what’s so difficult about typing Start123.”

146points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

😳😳😳 took me a minute to realize

30points

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#23

I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I'm dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.

140points

Coco 2 years ago

Scary

17points

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#24

"A friend of ours was puzzled with the odd messages left on his answering machine. Day after day friends and family would talk and then say, "Beep." He discovered the reason for the joke when he decided to listen to his greeting. "Hi," it said. "I'm not in right now, so please leave a beep after the message."

136points

Deborah Padgett 2 years ago

Ask and you shall receive....lol.

24points

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#25

I tried to say, "I'm a functional adult," but my phone changed it to "fictional adult," and I feel like that's more accurate.

133points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

I get the feeling Peter Pan would agree with you.

17points

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#26

IT Joke about relationship statuses on Facebook Facebook should have a limit on times you can update your relationship status, after 3 it should default to 'unstable'.

132points

Sue Bradley 2 years ago

Can I add - change your profile pic to an identical one on a daily basis, to elicit comments of you look fantastic Babe }:‑)

14points

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#27

"I was showing my kids an old rotary phone when my nine-year-old asked, “How did you text on it?” My 15-year-old daughter roared with laughter, until a thought occurred to her: “Wait, where did you store your contacts?”

130points

M O'Connell 2 years ago

All your contacts fit between your index finger and your brain ;)

48points

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#28

Can't see an end. I have no control and I don't think there's an escape. I don't even have a home anymore. Think it's time for a new keyboard.

129points

Andonis600 2 years ago

They had us in the first part, not gonna lie.

41points

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#29

"I’m at the library, and for some reason, when I plug my flash drive into the computer, it doesn’t show up. I keep trying, but nothing happens. As an IT major, I know I can figure this out. So I spend 15 minutes changing settings and inserting and removing the flash drive. Then a girl sitting next to me taps my shoulder and says, “You’re plugging into my computer, not yours.”

128points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

😳

18points

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#30

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because it is a hardware problem.

128points

Chris M 2 years ago

Hey now, I both program software and work with hardware. That said, I did once spend a while trying to figure out why a printer wasn't communicating on the network. Eventually a coworker came in to help me and pointed out that the network cable wasn't plugged in.

18points

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#31

IT Joke about autocorrect We'll we'll we'll... If it isn't autocorrect.

126points

Rijkærd 2 years ago

S**t ..they got me..

23points

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#32

How many types of people are there in the world?
There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who do not.

122points

Robert T 2 years ago

There are 11 types of people in the world. Those that understand that joke, those that don't and those who have heard it a million times before.

62points

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#33

CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.

121points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

MAKING IT SEEM LIKE YOU'RE MAD AT EVERYTHING SINCE THE FIRST ONLINE ARGUMENT OVER TOAST AND LEATHER SHOES. Seriously though, we need to learn that sometimes we can convey our anger with well placed punctuation and being particular with our wording, not by keeping caps lock on 24/7.

31points

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#34

Any room is a panic room if you've lost your phone in it.

118points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

We need phone leashes. Oh, yeah, we got rid of those.

44points

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#35

Person 1: Do you know how to use Outlook?
Person 2: As a matter of fact, I Excel at it.
Person 1: Was that a Microsoft Office pun?
Person 2: Word.

117points

Robert T 2 years ago

Access granted.

25points

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#36

IT joke about changing facebook name I'm changing my name to 'Benefits' on Facebook. Next time someone adds me, It will say "you are now friends with Benefits."

116points

Cassie Sondrup 2 years ago

Lol 😆

20points

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#37

Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children will be getting a visit from Satan this Christmas.

113points

Andonis600 2 years ago

Krampus is going to go out of business.

32points

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#38

The only people who don’t click Skip on ads before YouTube videos are people who died during that ad.

110points

Troll 2 years ago

That turned dark quickly

23points

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#39

Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.

107points

Pink kitty 2 years ago

Lol!

8points

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#40

"My husband and I are both in an Internet business, but he's the one who truly lives, eats and breathes computers. I finally realized how bad it had gotten when I was scratching his back one day. "No, not there," he directed. "Scroll down."

97points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Stop scrolling down before Insert

30points

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#41

IT Joke not having smartphone I can still remember a time when I knew more than my phone.

94points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Old fart ;)

13points

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#42

My password is the last 16 digits of Pi.

91points

Luna 2 years ago

So easy! It’s (REDACTED)!

26points

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#43

"If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2." - Recording on an Australian tax help line.

87points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

BWAAAHAAAHA 🤣 💜 me some Australians.

13points

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#44

I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".

83points

Claudia Henderson 2 years ago

Ingenious

14points

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#45

Hell is wallpapered with all your deleted selfies.

83points

Buren 2 years ago

OH Now it must be really bad there!!

5points

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#46

IT joke about sleep mode It's ok computer, I go to sleep after 20 minutes of inactivity too.

82points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

20 minutes... Ever tried to watch Netflix after dinner, while lying on the couch?

22points

#47

Mom: How make chicken.
Daughter: What?
Mom: Where buy chicken.
Daughter: Mom, this isn’t Google.
Mom: Avocado.

77points

Rijkærd 2 years ago

Hahahahah

8points

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#48

I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child.

70points

Andonis600 2 years ago

True gamers can relate.

15points

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#49

What made the Java developers wear glasses?
They can't C.

70points

Andonis600 2 years ago

Ffs

12points

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#50

I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

68points

Andonis600 2 years ago

Damn, I also forgot to install WINDOWS in case my HOME KEY got deleted.

11points

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#51

My mom said that if I don't get off my computer and do my homework she'll slam my head on the keyboard, but I think she's jokinfjreoiwjrtwe4to8rkljreun8f4ny84c8y4t58lym4wthylmhawt4mylt4amlathnatyn

35points

Georgia Hebert 2 years ago

Oops!

5points

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#52

Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it.

35points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Worth trying

6points

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#53

Tech One: I heard if you put the Windows ME CD in a CD player, there's a message from Satan that will enact a curse on your household and lineage.
Tech Two: That's nothing - if you put it in a computer, it installs Windows ME.

33points

NsG 2 years ago

How OLD are these jokes?! Could this one not be updated to Vista at least? Hmm.... Probably not....

8points

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#54

"As we waited for a bus in the frosty weather, the woman next to me mentioned that she makes a lot of mistakes when texting in the cold. I nodded knowingly. “It’s the early signs of typothermia.”

32points

Robert T 2 years ago

Now that's actually pretty good.

4points

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#55

Autocorrect can go straight to he’ll.

31points

Claudia Henderson 2 years ago

Ah.

4points

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#56

On the subway, untangling earbuds is the new knitting. The woman across from me could have finished a cardigan by now.

31points

Nikki Sevven 2 years ago

Use a bullnose clip. Open the clip and lay the earbuds end of the wire along the opening. Close the clip and gently wind the wires around it, in between the two earbuds...don't wind too tightly. Gently open the clip and insert the jack, then close it. They never come unwound or get tangled.

4points

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#57

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

31points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

You did not...🤣🤣

3points

#58

MapQuest really needs to start its directions on number five. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

30points

Erjenn Rejano 2 years ago

I didn't think MapQuest still existed

7points

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#59

"I mentioned to my sons that some teens used Facebook to plan a robbery at a local mall. “How did the NSA miss that?” my 21-year-old asked. “I told you guys,” said my 17-year-old. “No one uses Facebook anymore.”

29points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

🤯

3points

#60

I love the F5 key. It´s just so refreshing.

29points

Cassie Sondrup 2 years ago

Oh my gosh 😆

4points

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#61

Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.

28points

Katherine Boag 2 years ago

Nah its all selfies and food pics

2points

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#62

The closest I’ve been to a diet this year is erasing food searches from my browser history.

28points

Valerie G. 2 years ago

You know that little tip would be very helpful for the Weight Watcher people to put in their literature.

1point

#63

"The water I was heating for pasta refused to boil, and if my 12-year-old son was right, I wasn’t helping by constantly checking on it. “It’s like that old saying,” he said. “ A watched website never loads.’”

27points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Did You try to turn it off and on?

5points

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#64

Can a 3-D printer make ink cartridges for a 2-D printer?

27points

Claudia Henderson 2 years ago

Making me question my reality

6points

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#65

What happened to the iPod, who ate a lot?
He became an iPad.

27points

Andonis600 2 years ago

I see what you did there 👍🏼

9points

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#66

Writing a horror screenplay. It starts off with a ringing phone. The person answers, and it's their mum saying "I have a computer question."

26points

Quinn Enestvedt 2 years ago

LMFAOOOO

3points

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#67

I'm gonna spend Valentine 's Day with my ex... Box 360.

26points

Hunter 2 years ago

I bought a ps5. I sat on the box. Now I have an Xbox as well

1point

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#68

I bet cats have a secret website where they upload clips of cute humans trying to open DVD packaging and jump-start cars.

25points

#69

"Trying to explain to our five-year-old daughter how much computers had changed, my husband pointed to our brand-new personal computer and told her that when he was in college, a computer with the same amount of power would have been the size of a house.
Wide-eyed, our daughter asked, “How big was the mouse?”

24points

Robert T 2 years ago

There wasn't one. You had to use the cursing-keys.

3points

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#70

I assert dominance over millennials by responding to their texts with phone calls.

24points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

Mom...what are you doing on Bored 🐼?

7points

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#71

"My grandmother called to tell me she’d gotten an e-mail account. “Great,” I said. “Send me a message so I’ll have your e-mail address.” I waited and waited, but she never sent it. Several days later, an envelope arrived—Grandma had written her info on a piece of paper and mailed it to me."

23points

Jude Corrigan 2 years ago

Did you give her your email address? If not, where would she send it?

1point

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#72

I realized my little nephew will never know life without Facebook. He’ll never know what it’s like to go, “I wonder what happened to that guy Chris from high school?” and then just shrug his shoulders and move on.

23points

Mat O'Dowd 2 years ago

Rest assured your little nephew will never know life WITH Facebook ! That guy Chris is on another platform more suited to their generation.

2points

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#73

A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

23points

Robert T 2 years ago

My first computer had an error message, "Silly".

3points

#74

Why was the cell phone wearing glasses?
It lost its contacts.

22points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

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#75

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

22points

Metallicd3ath 2 years ago

*stubs toe*

3points

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#76

Don't use "beef stew" as a computer password. It's not stroganoff.

21points

Robert T 2 years ago

We used to use DEAD BEEF to mark areas of freed memory, as it can be written in hexadecimal. And the marker at the start of a Java class file is CAFE BABE.

3points

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#77

Scene: Me using the Siri app on my iPhone.
Me: Siri, call my wife.
Siri: Samantha McLaughlin is not in your contacts.
Me: Samantha Gibbs is my wife.
Siri: I’ve added Samantha Gibbs as your wife.
Me: Call my wife.
Siri: Which wife?

21points

moose man 2 years ago

Lmao I did this with my mom on my old phone. She said she didn’t know who is my mom after all that

0points

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#78

While he was visiting, my father asked for the password to our Wi-Fi. “It’s taped under the modem,” I told him. After three failed attempts to log on, he asked, “Am I spelling this right? T-A-P-E-D-U-N-D-E-R-T-H-E-M-O-D-E-M?”

21points

#79

Not everyone has mastered the art of texting.
Mom: Stop at dollar store on way home and get lunch maggots.
Me: Lunch maggots?
Mom: Baffles.
Mom: Baggies.
Mom: Ziploc lunch Baggies.
Mom: Spell-check is not helping me.
Mom: By the way, this is Dad.

21points

pat hayes 2 years ago

hysterical!

1point

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#80

The guy who invented auto-correct for smart phones passed away today. Restaurant in peace.

20points

ELIJAH MAY 2 years ago

I hoop his a reckoning goes well.

3points

#81

Hate to break it to you, Facebook, but the entire Internet is already a Dislike button.

20points

#82

Texting acronyms can stump even the best parents:
Mom: Your great-aunt just passed away. LOL.
Son: Why is that funny?
Mom: It’s not funny, David! What do you mean?
Son: Mom, LOL means Laughing Out Loud.
Mom: I thought it meant Lots of Love. I have to call everyone back.

20points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

I assume it's bad that I laughed as well, my apologies to the Great Aunt I just disrespected.

5points

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#83

Why did the computer go to the dentist?
To get his Bluetooth checked.

20points

Andonis600 2 years ago

We wouldn’t want them disconnected, would we now?

5points

#84

Cats spend two thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

20points

Evil Hornet 2 years ago

Good work cats, really good work

3points

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#85

Since my girlfriend discovered out the eyeroll and tongue sticking emojis she doesn't have to type words anymore.

20points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

I think that's just true for everybody at this point. If it has an emoji, it no longer needs a word or a letter.

4points

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#86

Have you heard of that new band "1023 Megabytes"? They're pretty good, but they don't have a gig just yet.

19points

Emily Jane 2 years ago

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#87

I’m thinking of opening a firing range where all the targets are shaped like computers with screens full of pop-up ads.

19points

Georgia Hebert 2 years ago

You'd be rich!

3points

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#88

Give a man a fish, and he’ll Instagram it; teach a man to fish, and he’ll still Instagram it.

19points

Ali H M Salehuddin 2 years ago

Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, he'll spend a fortune on fishing gears for the rest of his life.

6points

#89

Facebook and Formspring are two of the many social-networking sites that allow users to embarrass themselves in front of millions of friends and strangers, like these people did.
LARRY: Happy Valentine's Day to All, especially Wendy, Heather, Lindsey, Ellen, Valerie, Isabel, and all the other wonderful women I adore.
JENNIFER: You forgot your wife.

19points

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#90

Why do programmers mix up festivals like Halloween with Christmas?
Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC.

19points

Eric C. 2 years ago

Clever

5points

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#91

How did the computer save itself from drowning?
By using screensaver.

19points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

Plot twist: The screensaver was of the ocean.

2points

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#92

Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I'm feeling a connection.

19points

Jo Johannsen 2 years ago

**groan**

10points

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#93

What should you do after your Nintendo game ends in a tie?
Ask for a Wii-match!

18points

Quinn Enestvedt 2 years ago

Ow

3points

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#94

PATIENT: Doctor, I need your help. I'm addicted to checking my Twitter!
DOCTOR: I'm so sorry, I don't follow.

18points

#95

You know you're texting too much when you type ppl instead of people in a letter.

18points

IeabellAlakar@aqueenofaplanet 2 years ago

Letter? What kind of archane technology is this????!!?!

1point

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“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

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#96

I used to find buying books from Amazon slow and inconvenient, until one day the receptionist suggested I use their website.

18points

#97

What shoes do computers love the most?
Re-boots.

18points

Mad Kid 2 years ago

... wow ...

2points

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#98

You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."

18points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

And your point is what...😒

0points

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#99

My New Years resolution is 1080p.

18points

mcborge1 2 years ago

Mine is 1440p.

0points

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#100

"I just got a GPS for my car, and my first trip with it was to a drugstore. Since the manual said not to leave it in the car unattended, I brought it with me into the store. While there, the GPS came alive, and a voice stated, "Lost satellite contact." I wasn't embarrassed until a woman turned to me and said, "Your ankle bracelet monitor is talking to you."

17points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

BWAAAHAAAHA 🤣

0points

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Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

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#101

How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None as according to them, darkness is the new standard.

17points

Robert T 2 years ago

The great thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.

2points

#102

Moses had the first tablet that could connect to the cloud.

17points

Andonis600 2 years ago

Jesus digitalized confirmed.

1point

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#103

They should build the wall with Hillary's emails because nobody can get over them.

17points

Metallicd3ath 2 years ago

This joke was always going to date itself

2points

#104

Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? They were Prime mates.

16points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

🤚🤚🤚

-1point

#105

Mom: What do IDK, LY & TTYL mean?
Son: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
Mom: OK, I will ask your sister.

16points

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College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

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#106

I finally convinced my mother that it was a good idea for her to learn to text. Her first message to me? "Whereisthespacebar?"

15points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

BWAAAHAAAHA 🤦‍♀️

0points

#107

A solar-powered computer wristwatch, which is programmed to tell the time and date for 125 years, has a guarantee—for two years.

15points

Metallicd3ath 2 years ago

Keep scrolling, there is no joke here.

2points

#108

What would a baby computer call his father?
Da-ta!

15points

Katherine Boag 2 years ago

*Her* father: Data's child was a girl.

2points

#109

What was Forrest Gump's email password?
"1forrest1".

15points

Glynna Bowood 2 years ago

I like shrimp

1point

#110

I tried to escape the Apple store. I couldn't because there were no Windows.

15points

Cassidy ChillRose 2 years ago

You have to wait for the Apple to fall from it's tree, then hope it rolls out of the store.

1point

#111

I Googled "how to start a wildfire". I got 48,500 matches.

15points

Annie Bieber 2 years ago

Noooooooo!! 🤚

1point

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#112

Why did the computer show up at work late?
It had a hard drive.

14points

#113

"I’m employed at a computer security company and have a colleague whose name is M. Alware. His e-mail address is malware@company.com.
My ex-boss’s name is R. Stone. His e-mail was stoner@company.co.in.
My name is James Pan. Every other permutation of my name was taken (e.g., jpan, jamesp), so I’m stuck with japan@university.edu."

14points

Alicia GriffonLady 2 years ago

I had a teacher named Daniel Stone. The school email was first initial, last name. Stoned@school.edu did not amuse him as much as it amused everyone else. >.>

5points

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#114

Why were the horses struggling to use the internet?
Because they were not able to find any stable connections.

14points

#115

What do you call it when you have your mom's mom on speed dial?
Instagram.

13points

Robert T 2 years ago

*Instagran

3points

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#116

Why did the PowerPoint Presentation cross the road?
To get to the other slide.

13points

#117

My computer suddenly started belting out "Someone Like You." It's a Dell.

13points

#118

Why did the developer become so poor?
Because he used up all his cache.

13points

#119

How does a computer get drunk?
It takes screenshots.

12points

#120

Person 1: Hey Rachyl, do you remember me?
Person 2: Wrong number.
Person 1: What’s your number then?

12points

#121

Anyone who thinks "talk is cheap"... Obviously didn't pay my daughter's last mobile phone bill!

12points

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#122

What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?
Dead Siri-ous.

12points

#123

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

12points

#124

Richard Branson has announced plans to develop a new type of plane that can fly from New York to Tokyo in one hour. Apparently, the engines are powered by human screams.

11points

#125

Were Moses alive today, the Ten Commandments would be known as the Ten Best Practices, presented in PowerPoint and followed by 40 years of status meetings.

11points

#126

How did the SEO content writer couple react to twins?
For the first time, they were happy with duplicate content!

11points

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#127

What was the spider doing on the computer?
He was making a web-site.

11points

#128

Why was the computer found cold and sneezing?
Because someone left it's Windows open.

11points

moose man 2 years ago

Enough of these dad jokes

0points

#129

What is the computer's favorite snack to eat?
Microchips.

11points

#130

Why did the computer go all goofy?
Because the Disney virus got into it.

11points

#131

What happens when a hard drive gets into a fight?
It asks for a back-up.

11points

#132

How do trees make use of the internet?
They just log in.

11points

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#133

After a lengthy course on improving computer skills, a teacher finally seemed to get the hang of it. In fact, he admitted in his self-evaluation, "computers have simplified and shortened my life."

10points

#134

How do computers attack each other?
By using pop-up ads.

10points

#135

What did the computer have during his break time?
He had a byte.

10points

Robert T 2 years ago

But he wan't that hungry, so he just had a nibble. His friend said, "leave me a crumb". His other friend said, "can I have a bit". [nibble = 4 bits; crumb = 2 bits]

2points

#136

Why did the cat decide to buy a computer for herself?
Because she liked playing with the mouse.

10points

#137

Hackers brought down my online business but I managed to keep the website address and that's domain thing.

10points

J.L. Martin 2 years ago

Ba dump bump!

0points

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#138

These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, “So what’ll it be?” The first string says, “I think I’ll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy~~owmc63^Dz x.xvcu”.
“Please excuse my friend,” the second string says, “He isn’t null-terminated.”

10points

Damon Tripodi 2 years ago

Is this from a joke book from the '80s?

1point

#139

Why did the mother put airbags on the computer?
Because the computer might crash.

9points

#140

Which type of virus does not have any vaccine?
Computer virus.

9points

#141

Where do all the bachelor mice live?
At the mousepad.

9points

#142

How would a proud computer dad introduce his son?
A microchip off the old block.

9points

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#143

What is the speed of the system running on 8 hobbits?
1 Hob-byte.

8points

#144

What made the JavaScript developer so sad?
He did not Node how to Express himself.

8points

#145

Why did the programmer quit his job?
Because he didn't get a-rrays.

8points

#146

Why did the astronauts love using computers?
Because they are into space-bar.

8points

#147

How did Microsoft office get so famous?
Due to good Word of mouth.

7points

#148

Why did the man did not receive any messages on the phone?
Because it was a landline.

7points

Metallicd3ath 2 years ago

I think this is what they call an antijoke?

2points

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Linas Simonaitis

Linas is a SEO List Curator at Bored Panda with a bachelor's degree in Communication & Digital Marketing. Before, he did a quick internship at AMII and worked as a Wolt courier (in other words, before Bored Panda, he never had a real job). After an intense day of Googling and scrolling, he likes to lose himself in League of Legends or make a couple pretzels while practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Never shies away from a deep conversation, never runs out of jokes. Also an owner of 0.0028 Bitcoin.

Linas is a SEO List Curator at Bored Panda with a bachelor's degree in Communication & Digital Marketing. Before, he did a quick internship at AMII and worked as a Wolt courier (in other words, before Bored Panda, he never had a real job). After an intense day of Googling and scrolling, he likes to lose himself in League of Legends or make a couple pretzels while practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Never shies away from a deep conversation, never runs out of jokes. Also an owner of 0.0028 Bitcoin.

Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė

Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier. Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything!

Justė is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier. Justė's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. Ask her anything!

Konstancija Gasaitytė

Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. She has a bachelor’s degree in Translation and Interpreting and a master’s degree in Future Media and Journalism. She is very interested in sustainable fashion and is a perfect companion to go to second-hand shops and antiques for nearly anything: clothes, books or furniture. Her interests also include photography, literature and hiking.

Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. She has a bachelor’s degree in Translation and Interpreting and a master’s degree in Future Media and Journalism. She is very interested in sustainable fashion and is a perfect companion to go to second-hand shops and antiques for nearly anything: clothes, books or furniture. Her interests also include photography, literature and hiking.

Saulė Tolstych

Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.

What do you think ?

Joran Quinten 2 years ago

I think this is one of my favorites: "A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a ueicbksjdhd. First real customer walks in and asks where the bathroom is. The bar bursts into flames, killing everyone."

6points

Katinka Min 2 years ago

Another old one: 'How many Microsfot peeps does it tak to change a lightbulb?' 'None. Darkness becomes the industrial standard'

0points

Gogamash 2 years ago

As somebody from IT I can just say, those "jokes" are old. lame and not funny :-/

0points

Troll 2 years ago

To be fair though, some of them really couldn't be considered jokes.

0points

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Joran Quinten 2 years ago

I think this is one of my favorites: "A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a ueicbksjdhd. First real customer walks in and asks where the bathroom is. The bar bursts into flames, killing everyone."

6points

Katinka Min 2 years ago

Another old one: 'How many Microsfot peeps does it tak to change a lightbulb?' 'None. Darkness becomes the industrial standard'

0points

Gogamash 2 years ago

As somebody from IT I can just say, those "jokes" are old. lame and not funny :-/

0points

Troll 2 years ago

To be fair though, some of them really couldn't be considered jokes.

0points

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