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35 People Reveal Deathbed Confessions They’ve Heard That They Can’t Get Out Of Their Heads
Whether it's withholding your dark thoughts or embarrassing actions, keeping secrets is a normal part of human relationships. But so is the desire to get rid of them. After all, an open and truthful disclosure reduces stress and helps people come to terms with their behavior and sense of self. This is especially relevant in our last moments, which we want to spend in our loved ones' embrace and not obsess about our shortcomings. So when a post on r/AskReddit invited everyone to share the most memorable deathbed confessions they've heard, it received plenty of answers. Here are some of the things that were just too heavy for folks to take with them to the afterlife.
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#1
My dad had Alzheimer's and ended up in a secure ward. He was blind and almost deaf. I was visiting him one day. He didn't know who I was, but he started talking about me. He said I had done better than him in life and that he was proud of me. He was a quiet man IRL and never told me that when I was growing up.
Looking back, he did things that my dumb a*s never realised were for me. Like, when he retired his colleagues asked what he'd like as a present. He chose a scientific calculator (this was back in the 1970's). He had no use for it. He gave it to me for university. I thought he was just passing it on, not realising that he'd asked for it with me in mind.
David 2 years ago
The feels. I was pretty close to my grandmother (ma-ma) but I can still feel the pain of visiting her after she no longer remembered who I was. Thought I was a childhood friend. I'd be crying on the inside but trying to keep it together for her sake.
Shyla Bouche 2 years ago
Please forgive me if this hurts, but I think that the positive thing you can take from that isn't that she could or couldn't remember who you were. What she could remember was that you were someone she cared about.
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Wintermute 2 years ago
This is a good place to start the list. I have a feeling it's going to go downhill pretty quick from here. :p
bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
I missed the part where it stated that OP is American....
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#2
When I was in hospital, the guy in the bed next to me just asked to stop taking his meds as he was ready to die. Last thing I heard him say was "There's no one waiting for me at home, so I'm going where they are."
Wasn't really a shocking confession, just a lonely and heartbreaking one.
Ghost With No Teeth 2 years ago
No one is crying - it's just the rain. Yeah, it's definitely the rain.
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Shyla Bouche 2 years ago
My grandma was ready to die well before she went. She couldn't understand why she was still here. She felt like a burden to everyone. Her sisters and brothers were gone, her friends were gone, her husband had been gone for 30 years. She must have felt that the family took care of her because that's what families are supposed to do. I don't think she understood at that point how very much loved she was. Even if she did, she was ready to take her rest, and to be with HER family. I think about her every day, and remember the wonderful, amazing woman that she was. And I hope that she lets my brother win against her now and then at dominos!
Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
I so understand this. And as a nurse, it is heartbreaking to hear.
Mark Carla Hillman 2 years ago
that shouldn't be sad....he knew he was going to a place that was better than the one he was leaving.
PinkLadyEmpress 2 years ago
That’s sad but also somewhat wholesome at the same time (he wants to be with his family)
#3
I have an amazing one:
My great grandmother lived a very long and interesting life. She was in her 20s in the great depression. She had a wild streak from those days that we don't know much about, to the point that we actually don't know our great grandfather's name. Just the husband she took later.
Over the course of her nearly 100 year life, she had collected owls. Literally thousands of owl figurines. She had clocks, wall-hangings, potholders, lamps, stained glass art, salt shakers, and more little figurines than you could imagine, all depicting owls.
We all wondered the importance of the owls. She never talked about them, we just all knew she loved owls.
Well, when she was nearing death, at the age of 98 or 99, and the docs said she had days, my grandparents went and talked to her and they asked her if she had anything she wanted to share or ask before she goes.
She thought for a moment, then said, "I never understood the owls."
It turns out, she didn't really give a s**t about owls. Near as we could piece together sometime in the 40s or 50s perhaps, she bought either a trivet or a set of salt/pepper shakers that were owls. Then someone got her the other. Those were the oldest owls anyone could remember. But from there, someone got her an owl to match, probably a potholder or place mat. And all the sudden her kitchen was owl themed. From there, it snowballed. The owls flowed like wine, baffling her for 60 years, eventually taking over as the bulk of her personal belongings.
The moral is: if you're not actually into something, mention it early.
(Anti)Social Penguin 2 years ago (edited)
I see myself being that lady in a few years. Except i will know how it got there - someone concluded i love owls since i have 2 little trinkets in a flower pot. I don’t dislike owls, but I don’t particularly like them. And it is rude to comment on a gift you received, especially if it’s a nice one.
bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
The problem is that there is not enough penguin themed brick a brac!
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Ruth Kennedy 2 years ago
With me it was pigs. Saw some cute pig ornaments once and commented on them. For year afterwards it was everything pig-themed. Don't get me wrong, I admire any animal that has half hour orgasms, but my choice in decor isn't necessarily porcine.
Colleen Glim 2 years ago
Now I wanna google if pigs have orgasms. Thanks BP!
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Tenacious Squirrel 2 years ago
It’s odd no one ever mentioned her liking of owls to her at any point so she could refute it… I mean she could have just told people but I get she may have felt awkward, at least at times. Although she then displayed them all too? Which must have made it seem like she was collecting them. So it’s understandable people began to think she was deliberately collecting them. But didn’t any of these people ever remark on it? Like asking “Grandma, what is it you like about owls so much?” “Why do you collect them?” “Which items are you looking for next?” Etc? In 60 years?!
Queenie G 2 years ago
For my grandmother it was pigs. She and granddad had a farm with lots of different animals. My uncle gave her a little stuffed pig as a gift at some point. Some one saw the pig and bought her a little pig figurine. Eventually she had pig everything. She shared with me, after I grew up and had my own children, that she didn't get the pig thing. She wasn't a pig enthusiast. (her words) :D
Froggi Juice 2 years ago
My grandmother also got loooots of pig themed gift, except it was because her maiden name Bacon. We all think its funny and now she has a bunch of pig decor
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David 2 years ago
This played out as chickens in a close friend's family. My best friend's sister had tons of decorative chickens. People would buy them for her as gifts. One day she decided to downsize and folks were sort of upset. "Why would you get rid of your beloved chickens?" and all that. But story was basically the same as above. At some point she got a couple and I guess said nice, polite things about them and folks got it in their heads she loved collecting chickens and kept buying her more of them.
Holly Stevens 2 years ago
My mum told me, never tell people you like one specific thing or that's all you'll get as gifts
#4
This isnt a confession, but I just wanted to share the last thing my grandfather said to me before he passed away due to lungcancer. I was about to go to Rome for a schooltrip and my family told me to go to set my mind on something else for a few days. Before I left I wanted to say goodbye as it was possibly the last time I could talk to him. He told me: "Have fun boy, I'll see you next week." I went to Rome and when I came back, he was already in a deep sleep due to medication. He wanted to peacefully pass away while sleeping. I came back the next week and he was sleeping when I went to visit him. I told him everything I did in Rome even though I knew he wouldn't wake up. The next morning he passed away. My grandmother said to me: "He waited for you"
I still miss him so much.
Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
They do sometimes. My dad was lingering for so long and we didn’t understand why. Then we realized he was waiting to see his brother, who lived a long way away. Not going into the s***y family stuff, but the last thing I had to tell my dad was that his brother wasn’t coming. He couldn’t talk, but I will never forget the look in his eyes. We must have been right because he died early the next day.
Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
Your grandad waited for you because he loved you so much and wanted to hear about your wonderful trip. It made him happy. Then it was ok to go. Of course you will always miss him. He sounds like such a wonderful man.
Illustrious G 2 years ago
Something similar happened when my grandpa passed. Even though he hadn’t been awake for a few days, he waited until all 6 of his children were there by his bedside before he passed. 🥲
A. Starhawk Hunt 2 years ago (edited)
My husband, my son’s stepfather, was in hospice, just palliative. His mind was lost. My son wasn’t just his (literally) red headed stepchild, he was also, compliments of my ex, his godfather. He adored my kids (a long story, we’d known each other forever). My son and I are both fearful of hospitals, but my son (N) came to stay with me in hospice. After 4 days, it was clear that Ed was passing; he was on a constant morphine drip, and comatose. I begged him and begged him to let go and be out of pain. My son, as stressed as I was, went to smoke. I’d gone to the restroom. When I came out, Ed had quit living. I believe that he knew N had left; he didn’t want N there when he died.
#5
My grandpa, a Sicilian man with blessed cooking skills, told us on his deathbed that his meatballs were actually frozen meatballs from the grocery store
Lord of the laserprinter. 2 years ago
I can imagine him finishing of with a resounding: „BHWaaaaHAHa“
Jake B 2 years ago
My friend at the store buying BC dark fudge brownie mix. Her secret recipe. I just looked at her and smiled, promised not to tell. We all knew. Everyone in the cooking club knew.
Distracted Serpent 2 years ago
My mom made her boxed brownies with canola oil instead of vegetable oil and no one believed they were box mixes.
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Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
🤣🤣🤣🤣 such a great memory. And for such a cook, what a confession. Makes it easier for you to replicate the recipe though.
Neuropotathy 2 years ago
From the grocery store from a chain shadow owned by grandpa's "family".
#6
Not my story but that of a hospice worker who spoke to my class. For those who don’t know, hospice is a method of end-of-life care that focuses on alleviating the emotional & physical pain of a dying person to ease their passing rather than combatting their imminent death.
One of her patients was a bed-bound woman in her 90s who was generally unresponsive but had flashes of recognition & engagement. It’s hard to gauge the level to which unresponsive patients are detached from their surroundings, so they encourage family members to keep their company in hopes of soothing the patient. Now this patient was from a U.S. state that prided itself on its state university (and the university’s football team). The woman’s family had attended this university for four or five generations. During her hospice care, however, her great-granddaughter was the first in their family to decide to go to a different school—the rival state’s university, in fact. Her family was supportive of her decision but often joked about her being the “rebel” or “Judas” or what-have-you.
One day, they were all sitting around the woman’s bedside, teasing the girl about her decision. Suddenly, the patient sat up, looked at her great-granddaughter, said, “Traitor,” and f*****g DIED.
Edit: Thanks for the awards! FWIW, the hospice worker said her family (eventually) thought it was hilarious. Go Bucks
Historyharlot93 2 years ago
My husbands grandmother was a Buckeye. She was LITERALLY on her deathbed on a game day. My in-laws showed her that the Bucks had won, she smiled happily, then slipped into a coma and died a few hours later.
Phoenix(or nix)they/them 2 years ago (edited)
Sounds like Ohio. Most Ohio State fans pride themselves in our football (American football) team at Ohio State University. Edit: I just saw the "Go Bucks"
#7
My husband had a cardiac event that required an ambulance. As the ambulance was arriving I asked him if the code to open his phone was XXXX, he said yes, then looked up at me and said "I am so sorry". He had successful surgery, but had several strokes on the operating table and was taken off life support after 7 days. When I opened his phone I found out he was having an affair. The same code to his phone also opened his laptop where I found telephone recordings of he and his girlfriend, as well as screenshots of their chats. I don't know how interesting this is, but it was certainly devastating to me.
Kate Priestley 2 years ago (edited)
I found out about my late husband's affair the same way, except he never said sorry.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
that's sad to hear. I hope you have recovered from that. It must have been devastating.
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Kaci Corrigan 2 years ago
I think I’m struggling with the idea that when one’s beloved spouse is being placed in the ambulance during a cardiac event, that the conversation was about his phone passcode. That’s a first for me, and I e been loading patients into ambulances for almost 20 years.
The_tattered_hippie 2 years ago
Maybe she needed to contact his cardiologist to let the dr know they were going to hospital, maybe she needed to contact a family member who's number she didn't have stored in her phone. Maybe she needed to pull insurance info off of his work portal app. There are 100 reasons a person may need to get into the device that pretty much holds their spouses whole life.
Load More Replies... SlightlyTarnished 2 years ago
Technology, a two edged sword. Why share the code, some things better left unknown, did no one any good, least his wife, to know of the affair.
Anyone-for-tea? 2 years ago
She already knew the code, she just confirmed it with him.
Load More Replies... #8
My Nana was renowned for religiously having a gin and tonic at 9pm every night. She and my Grandpa had started the tradition on the honeymoon and she continued it 20 years after his death.
On her own deathbed in the hospital we managed to sneak in a gin and tonic in a hip flask. We offered it to her, only for Nana to turn around and say "I've never really been fond of them"
Bless her, she went out laughing at us
The Scout 2 years ago
My Grandma had the decade long habit to have a single glass of egg liqueur every evening before going to bed. Unfortunately when dementia set in during the last years, she could not always remember if she already had had her glass or not - which one time lead to her going through an entire bottle of egg liqeur that evening....
Powerful Katrinka 2 years ago
Do you mean something like Advocaat or VOV?
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whatever 2 years ago (edited)
Saw some pictures that a guy and his two brothers posted when they went to visit their dying uncle in the hospital and snuck in some beers so they could all share one last round together. I literally sobbed through that one.
Michelle M 2 years ago
When my grandfather was dying, he asked for a bottle of beer. One of my uncles refused and my dad said, “what the hell? Let him have his bottle. Can’t do worse than death.” He had one last bottle for the road and passed well.
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#9
I worked as a night janitor in the children's cancer ward at my local hospital. There was a little boy (about 6 years old) laying in bed and he called me in to his room because he wanted help adjusting his pillow (he was hooked up with wires and stuff so he couldnt roll over to place the pillow how he wanted.) Figuring I'd be allowed to do it since a nurse wasn't really needed for it, I parked my cart outside of the room and went in.
In the room, he started asking me different questions about my job. The first being was I a nurse. I said no. He asked me if I seen his mom in the hallway and told me that she'd gone down to the cafeteria to get him strawberry milk and a donut, I said no to that to. He was quiet for a second. Then he looked me right in the face and said "If I pass away soon, I hope that my mom is not sad."
That hit me. Like really really hard. This kid was 100 percent aware that he could die and his mother would be affected by it. I didn't even know how to feel so I told him that he wasn't going to pass away and hundreds of people survive cancer (which is a big number to someone that young). I left shortly after and broke down crying in the bathroom. A few days later, I was wiping down the wooden support railings along the walls of that hallway and his room was "closed for cleaning + disinfection". That sign is only hung outside of rooms when someone dies
A girl 2 years ago
Where I'm from, they put a crafted butterfly on the door. I never noticed until mom. Nothing on the door when I entered, butterfly after I and the nurse realized she'd literally passed in front of us. My brother was in an accident and I got a call he wasn't doing well. I got to the hospital as quickly as I could. Only to find butterflys on his door.💔
Aboredpanda 2 years ago
It's very possible he'd been told he was dying, so it might be confusing being told he wasn't. Quite young kids kan have good insight about their own mortality.
Karri Berkowitz 2 years ago
Terminal children are the strongest and most excepting that I have ever seen. They seem so grown up it makes it that much sadder.
Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
I once went to a lecture about death and dying given by Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross. She did a large part about kids and dying. Jaw dropping.
PolymathNecromancer 2 years ago
She is amazing. I have never met her in person ! <3
Load More Replies... The_tattered_hippie 2 years ago
I work in a hospital and I am a mom to a child cancer survivor.... and we also put that sign on hospital doors when the patient had highly contagious diseases like Cdiff, TB, MRSA, bacterial sepsis etc. all pretty common for cancer patients to get also. it may be different at that hospital, but every where I've worked as a nurse and the hospitals my son (8yo) has been, those signs are multi-use.
#10
When my grandfather was on his deathbed, he told the doctor "f**k you, I ain't dying!" He fought for as long as he could, survived 4 heart attacks and god knows how many strokes, but eventually he passed. But goddamn if he wasn't an inspiration. Some days I have a hard time getting out of bed, or finding a reason to do anything. But this old coot found a reason to keep living: spite. He looked death in the face several times and said "f**k you, I'm gonna make you work for it!" Miss ya Butch.
eMpTy 2 years ago
Kat, thankyou for the quote, unknown to me, so I searched for its source. Dylan Thomas. In return I offer you a link to (what I now know) is a stirring reading of the poem. Henceforth, I shall "rage against the dying of the light", https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-sM-t1KI_Y
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Annie 1973 2 years ago
Then my soulmate husband fell asleep in my arms and passed away peacefully. I miss him and love him with all my heart and soul. My life before I met him and after he passed away has been like living in hell. Last 2 years have been worst. I've tried to kill myself 6 times and my electricity is switched off because I couldn't afford to pay the bill in below freezing conditions with a ton of snow so I'm in bed with lots of warm quilts and battery powerbanks. I think that I'll be gone soon which is for the best. My life should have ended when he passed away.
Annie 1973 2 years ago
When my soulmate was on his death bed with multi organ system failure he was so angry at everything and didn't want to die. His body had failed but his brain hadn't and so he kept ripping out the ivs and wanted to go home because he refused to believe he was dying even though we knew he was. I talked to his daughter who was a nurse at a different hospital and asked her to try to talk to him and calm him down and she really tried but he was terrified about dying and refused to accept the truth. I asked her what we could do and she said there was a way to get him calm and let us say our goodbyes and he would then fall asleep and pass peacefully. I knew what she meant and agreed it was for the best so we talked to the doctor who agreed that it was for the best. So he got given a large dose of morphine which was enough to calm him so that we could say our goodbyes and I could tell him how much I loved him. I gave him a kiss and held him while the doctor gave him another dose
#11
I didn't see it, but my aunt watched her elderly mother fall down the stairs and confess just before she died that she wasn't her biological mother.
She told my aunt that her oldest sister was actually her mother. The sister had gotten pregnant too young and the mom said it was hers. A common way of handling it back then. She revealed it in her very last breath.
Monarch cat lady 2 years ago
Confessing something like can destroy relationships and families. Unfortunately. It's so sad.
SlightlyTarnished 2 years ago
More common than people might think, maybe not today with teen moms on TV and all, but back in the day not unheard of.
ScarletRos 2 years ago
I used to work in a nursing home and there was a similar situation with one of the residents. Her daughter had a child young so the mother raised her as her daughter. It wasn’t until the mother developed dementia that the truth came out: the woman she thought was her mother was actually her grandmother, while her sister was her real mother.
Peter Ledoux 2 years ago
Words are often a double-edged sword. I'm more careful of them as I age.
Jake B 2 years ago
Raised as sister, but the older was the mother. These days people are more accepting, so it probably would not have been a secret.
Load More Replies... #12
Mother ran a nursing home growing up. From ages 5-10 I spent every weekend with residents.
Because I was a kid, residents often confessed stuff they thought I wouldn’t understand.
Two stick out. One funny, one not.
Women was dying, maybe about 96. Even had her last burst of energy/life where she thought she was “better” (this is common). A Black delivery man came with some flowers. After he left she looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, “I can’t believe I’m dying without having been with a colored man.”
Second one was while I was reading bible verses to a resident, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to drop that baby in the well.”
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
Sometimes, I think people at that stage can become confused and may even get mixed up between dreams and memories. For instance, I had an elderly couple at the store and the man was very much afflicted with dementia or something neurological. He started talking about "the war" and "hiding bodies under the porch." His wife was beside herself saying he never fought in a war and she didn't know what he was referring to. At least, I really hope so anyway!
pink_panda 2 years ago
My grandpa also has violent, terrifying memories of war. He was never in any war. Apparently, he stopped talking so much about these vivid memories when my mom's husband went on vacation and no one in the house was watching action movies. Alzheimer's is awful.
Load More Replies... OmBoyGanesh 2 years ago (edited)
What shocks me most about this post is that OP says “Mother” and not “My mother.” I dunno why, but when people reference their parents to strangers or non-family in such a way it creeps me out a little. I picture Norman Bates.
Potato 2 years ago
Reminds me of Pence referring to his own wife as Mother.
Load More Replies... Potato 2 years ago
The same respect you expect when longing for some pootang. What you should conclude, though, is that based on the language she used ("colored" instead of "Black") that she was likely from a time when interracial relationships were discouraged and she may be regretting someone she wanted to be with in the past, and that people with dementia say weird s**t. Should I conclude from your comment that you are only attracted to your own race? Because we could really make a lot of assumptions on that.
Load More Replies... #13
Not a deathbed confession, but the last conversation I had with my grandfather has always stuck with me. He had Parkinson’s, and lived on a farm outside of town. One day he looked at me and said “I’m getting too old to take care of Mom (my grandmother). I need you to do that for me, okay?” His health deteriorated pretty rapidly from that point onward
I still call my grandmother every single day, and try to get back home whenever I can to help out around the farm.
Fox Rogers 2 years ago
My grandpa did the same to me. There's only me. That was 11 years ago. I call gma daily and do all her chores and take her to the Dr etc. She's as with it and mean and manipulative and abusive as ever. I resent him telling me this. My kids need more from me than they get because my narc mom and gma take and take.
You Should Do Nothing with the Fence 2 years ago
Not to meant to be negative, but that's a lot to put on a person. I understand though, it helps the person who is dying to leave in peace.
BeepBoop the Single Pringle 2 years ago
yea sorry that's not funny. -from a gen z person with serious depression and anxiety. Just because mental illnesses are more widely talked about now doesn't mean they're a new thing. It was often swept under the rug for my parents and grandparents. And gen z isn't all the bad either. I have some amazing friends who would do the same thing as OP. Yes we're kind of hopeless for the future but that doesn't mean we're bad people. Millennials are just as addicted to their phones as us
Load More Replies... #14
My great grandfather was in his mid 90's when he died. Health was always good, but a benign tumor deemed to dangerous to operate on at his age went septic. He was dead a week later.
I went to visit him in the hospital. My family used to see him a lot, but there was a falling out between him and my grandma several years before, so we stopped seeing them. Funny enough though, I constantly ran into him at the store and we always had nice chats.
Anyway, in the hospital he told me not to worry about him. Most everyone he's every known was dead, and he was ready to die.
The week he felt himself getting sick, he know something was off and made arrangements to get my great grandma into a nursing home. He took care of her with her alzheimer's, so he wouldn't die until he knew she was taken care of. They were married for over 70 years. My favorite story is that every Sunday for over 50 years, he would drop my great grandma off at church, and then sat in the car and waited for her. Hated religion, but loved his wife lol.
#15
I may not be your real grandfather, I kidnapped your Mom when she was little. That was a heck of a punch in the gut for sure.
SarahBee 2 years ago
Sounds like they weren't sure who the baby's father was, but the mother had died, so the granddad took her.
Load More Replies... Bindi Lenard 2 years ago
Woah! Hope they went to police. Their real family would love to know that they’re alive. 😔
#16
My time to shine; I worked at a hospital in Garmisch-Partenkirchen, a small town near Munich for the last 14 years. My job there is not fancy at all, I move people around, throw the trash out and occasionally I take care of some handy-like work (fix a leaking shower head and stuff like that).
As you can imagine, I get to see a lot of patients that come and go, some of them pass away (such is life, I guess). I remember a few instances of people confessing to me their biggest regrets, here are some examples:
- An old polish woman, told me that she regretted "not f*****g Hitler when she had the chance" (her words). I wanted to ask her about more context, but I was afraid to be honest.
- Another notable example was an old truck driver that used to work for an Easter Germany company, he told me that he once run over some kids with his truck and was too afraid to stop and check if they were ok.
- Once another Polish lady told me that she used to be a prostitute during 2nd World War and that she slept with "very high up" people in the government. She told me that she did not regret that part of her life, but that she could not tell anyone and that was a heavy emotional drag. She also told me that she aborted more than five babies during that time.
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
WWII was a very heavy time. So were the years, on the eastern side of the Berlin Wall before it finally came down. You did what you had to to to survive, so no one—-especially someone who can never understand it because they never had to live like that—-has any right to lay blame on you for it. Extraordinary circumstances require extraordinary actions and behavior that aren’t natural to a person, but are necessary for their survival.
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Julia Mckinney 2 years ago
ANY war is usually messed up. Look at some of the stories coming out of Ukraine right now.
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EmbersAreOut 2 years ago
ah yes. the Polish. The amount of crazy stories i hear from my mom and grandma from their time in Poland in incredible!
#17
My grandfather admitted to me and only me that he "accidentally" had sex with a man
Gin Marie 2 years ago
"Accidentally"? Like, they were both naked and one of them fell and their d*ck just happened to impale the other guy?
A B C the Third 2 years ago
Just ask some doctors. Happens all the time with coke bottles, fruit and vegetables, billard balls etc. Cleaning your home naked is dangerous!
Load More Replies... Shelli Aderman 2 years ago
It’s so sad that openness and acceptance weren’t what they are today. And yet we still have SO far to go! 😔
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Possibly he had sex with a transvestite and only found out about that later. ("Unintentionally" would have been a better adverb, but they are so often interchangable.)
Load More Replies... Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Funny quote from The Office, Creed: “I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.“
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Steve Kenney 2 years ago
I hear this sometimes from people about thier family members admissions. How do you accidentally have sex with the same gender? Were they just walking and OOPS they tripped onto that persons genitals and thought "Eh, I'm here why not"
#18
My partners grandfather never spoke about his WW2 service, we are Australian. He joined after lying about his name and age so we can't find any records, he would have been 16. We do know he was in the Pacific somewhere and when he got back his lie was exposed and because he was by then 18 he was drafted under his real name...and promptly arrested, he would do anything to not get sent back to fight! He got drunk, fought and self harmed.
His adult life was spent mostly as an alcoholic and being a s**t husband and father though in his later years he was able to make some good. Grandkids appearing softened him.
In his dying hours he relived his time at war. Some things he said...
Oh god they are here
The japs are behind us sir
Stab him, stab him...f*****g stick him!
Help
Medic
All around
And he also had a string of names he kept saying. Such a tortured, broken mind.
Jods 2 years ago
After my grandad died I took possession of some folders full of sketches. One folder is horrific as he had drawn what happened to allied soldiers in Japanese POW camps. He escaped capture and somehow made his way to Egypt. He was put on a ship to New York, given two weeks leave and then redeployed the Royal Engineers. I can’t bear to look at these pictures but I will never get rid of them.
Queen Boudicca 2 years ago
The boy who left died in that war. The man that returned was in so much pain. My heart breaks for all of you.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
same thing happened to a friend's dad, ranting stuff from the war.
Miss Frankfurter 2 years ago
So sad. I’ve seen that happen a lot with people who have been to war.
Monarch cat lady 2 years ago
Should have written down the names and researched them. If friends from war they could have answered some questions for you.
#19
Many years ago I was working in an open heart surgery ICU and had a man in his early 40’s as my patient. He had many tattoos of demons, etc. He didn’t recover very well after his emergency heart surgery and was in a medically induced coma for about two weeks before we could wake him up and remove his breathing tube. When he finally woke up he was crying. He said I feel like I just spent an entire lifetime in hell and I’ve done horrible things in my life and I completely deserved it. He wept for hours and wanted to apologize to everyone he had ever hurt in his life.
Mario Strada 2 years ago
I had a liver transplant and I was in a deep depression for years afterward. One day a kitten showed up at our door. A long hair tuxedo. He adopted me and slept with his little face in the palm of my hand. One day I realized I wasn't depressed anymore. Unfortunately, after he did his job, he died of a heart murmur. A month later we found his "clone" and adopted him. He is still with us and he also sleeps with his head in the palm of my hand (despite being a 20lb fluffy monster now). I'd be dead of not for those guys.
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Shana Hay 2 years ago
I got covid in 2021 and was in a coma for almost a month. I lived life times in that month. Some was really weird/scary/confusing, but some was hilarious! I had to sit down with my family and ask what actually happened. Even still, I sometimes have to ask them 'memory or hallucination?' because I can't tell the difference.
#20
My Grandma suffered from dementia for many years before she passed. It got so bad she didn’t remember who her family were, and would barricade herself in her home because she was scared of everyone. She even forgot she smoked and would find her cigarettes months later after forgetting where they were and claim she was desperate for one. She’d put them away after 1 and that would be her again for months. The only memories she had left at the end was that her sister used to be able to play the piano beautifully and her husband - her childhood sweetheart - was gone but she didn’t know where (he’d died some time earlier). She spent her days waiting for him to come home from wherever he was. “My John will be home soon” she would say, or someone would walk past the window and she’d double take and say “thought that was my John”. It was heartbreaking watching her deteriorate until she was on her deathbed, unaware of anything or anyone. I went to say my goodbyes to her in the hospital and she held my hand and told me how much she loved me but how she was ready to go be with John now. In that moment, she remembered who I was, what was happening to her and that her husband, my Grandad, had gone already. She went in her sleep not long after that, and I’m forever thankful I managed to say goodbye and tell her how much I loved her too. I’ve held onto that moment for so long without really digesting it in anyway that writing this just tore my heart out. I miss them both so much but I know they’re finally together again somewhere.
barn owls ️ 2 years ago
there’s a thing that sometimes happens with dementia patients. before the end, they have a moment of clarity where they remember their life and family.
Solangelo4life!!! 2 years ago
That’s a bit supernatural and incredibly fascinating. And sad.
Load More Replies... A. Starhawk Hunt 2 years ago (edited)
My paternal grandmother descended into dementia not long after my Horrifically abusive grandfather died, and spent the next 16 years in a home. I barely remember him except him screaming at 6 years old me and my four year old brother. But, when I was 16, a death in the family led to my seeing her in the home. I’ll never forget he affectionate memories of my grandfather…..and going on and on about her wonderful son, Skippy. 40 year old Skippy was sitting right beside her.
#21
Not exactly on his deathbed. My step father emailed me the night he passed away. In general, he was always in pain from chemo, cancer, meds and whatnot. He did not want to continue spending money as he wasted away. He asked me to never tell the rest of the family: "but I'm taking all my sleeping pills tonight after your Mom goes to bed. With luck, she'll never know the truth. It would break her."
Mark Trombley 2 years ago
People who are dying should get whatever they want. Want some heroin? Here you go. Painkillers? Have a half gallon.
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Sweet Taurus 2 years ago
Wow, what a harsh truth to give to you though. Idk how I would react to something like that. I don't think I could tell my Mom the truth.
Jessica Bertram 2 years ago
that is awful to put on someone else. What a terrible burden, to be asked to carry that secret. 😞
Monica Lopez King (Moni) 2 years ago
You must be a very strong soul and he probably knew it. If anything I can imagine at least feeling relief from seeing your loved one suffer any longer
#22
My grandfather had pretty terrible dementia and he kept making deathbed confessions as he knew he didn’t have much time left. They were often about witnessing a murder and not telling anyone, but each time he confessed to us the details changed. It happened a couple of times a day over the course of his final week. We finally figured out that he would watch the local news and hear about these things happening then would think he had actually witnessed them.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
My grandad was really into our family history and also wanted to write a personal history book (unfortunately never finished but we have a large part of it). When his dementia was really bad near the end he kept telling us a family history story, over and over again. Thing is, when he was lucid we heard the actual one, but this version was very exaggerated. He brought a criminal aspect of it, among other things that he just kept imagining in his head.
Peter Ledoux 2 years ago
Sad, my Dad was really bad at the end, so sad. I live in an ALF and it's scary how fast it can come on. On her own for months, bang she was being led around by the hand. That and the people dying on a regular basis this place can be depressing as hell. Thank God for my program.
#23
My great uncle actually confessed to having two illegitimate sons right before he kicked the bucket in front of his own children and grandchildren.
The crazy thing was that none of his children knew this life of his. Not even my great aunt knew about it because she would have made a huge fuss if she was alive at that time and knew about it.
What was crazier was that these two sons already passed away five and seven years ahead of him respectively. He was 98 years old and his “invisible” sons were 65 and 69 years old.
The children found out thay one of his invisible sons actually was a teacher at a school that his grand daughters attended when they were in high school.
Nevertheless, his children decided to reach out to the children of his invisible sons. They got connected and learned more stuff about my grand uncle.
The craziest thing was that I actually dated one of the granddaughters of one of the invisible sons (the one passed away at the aged of 69 years old).
Talking about a few degrees of separation aye!
Robert Trebor 2 years ago
I knew a guy whose grandfather married and had 8 kids in Atlanta, Georgia; left that wife, "married" again in Mississippi, had a bunch of kids; left that place, and did it again in the Dallas, Texas area, by which time he might've had time to start it up all over again somewhere else. Odd, though. Each batch of kids had the same names in sequential order. Eldest boy got his name in each family.
OmBoyGanesh 2 years ago
I’m loving the use of “invisible” as it adds a profundity to what everyone was dealing with.
#24
Not really a confession but my cousin and I got into a car accident and he died. His friends got him to steal and vandalize so many things. They also put him in jail 4 different times. When we were in the hospital and he was about to die his last words were “Welp if I go to hell at least I’ll be with all my friends. I love you.”
OmBoyGanesh 2 years ago (edited)
I’m a little confused. The cousin had zero agency or the peer pressure was dangerous and he had to comply???? And wouldn’t it have been his crimes, whether committed begrudgingly or under duress or not, that got him sent to jail? Not his friends? Culpability matters if OP expects us to relate.
Lubica Acker 2 years ago
I don't believe in heaven or hell, but if I did, I don’t think that’s how the hell works.
#25
My dad has a special ability to gain people’s trust. (In a good way).
Twice now he’s had instances where dying people tell him things that they feel they can’t tell their family.
The one case was when my aunt’s mother-in-law was dying. She explained to my dad that her husband cannot live alone and that they both agree he must find a new partner after she passes...
He did. He remarried within a year of her passing. At the age of 81. The family was very upset about him moving on so fast. My dad had to stand up for him and reassure them that it is what his late wife wanted.
LeeAnne B 2 years ago
My father in law married shortly after his wife's death. He married his sister in law. The one person my mother in law told us not to let near him. She did not want him to remarry.
Annie 1973 2 years ago (edited)
My ex stepmother married her deceased sister's widower. He seems to make her a lot happier than she was with my father who was a serial cheater
Load More Replies... Evan not Hansen 2 years ago
There was this guy I knew from church when I was little, friendly grandfather type. He'd married 3 times. The first wife passed away after a struggle with cancer, leaving him with several young children, so he married again about 1.5 years later. Then she died of cancer, but before she passed made a list of people she thought would be good potential wives for her husband, one of those being her divorced best friend, who he ended up marrying. When my neighbor passed away, the advice he gave to her widower was to start dating again to help combat the loneliness, and my neighbor got remarried about a year later to a very sweet lady who all my family loves. :)
#26
Not quite a deathbed confession as my family didnt want me to see my grandma there as they were worried my memory of her being a happy and cheerful woman would be marred, and they were probably right. So I got to send her a letter which they read aloud to her. They told me that some of her last words were my name, and she passed just a few minutes after it was read to her. She managed to think of me in her last moments, despite being drugged heavily enough to knock out an elephant, and Ill always remember that about her.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 2 years ago
Aww that’s sweet, when my Nana was dying we all went to visit her… she had decided to stop the meds and just die because of all the suffering, so we all went in and said hi. She looked so delicate, and she was so thin, but she smiled at all of us and said it would be ok, and gave me back a little wooden bird I’d sent her for good luck. I miss her.
A. Starhawk Hunt 2 years ago
Kinda wish I didn’t know mine. One grandfather was physically abusive, the othe molested me from the time I was 2 on.
Load More Replies... Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
I witnessed my great grandmother pass. It was confusing because I knew she was dying and felt upset but she smiled at me the entire time. We learned at her graveside from her headstone that she actually passed on her anniversary to her late husband. I like to think he had come to get her and that's why she smiled.
#27
My great uncle had pancreatic cancer and was very frail because of it. I helped him bathe, use the restroom, and change him each morning. Not his last words to me but something he said that has stuck with me since were "I hate feeling so useless, I can't do this anymore, I'm so sorry you have to do this." I told him I never minded doing this for him, I loved him so much, and I'd always be there for him. I had to move away a few weeks later because my mom wanted me back home as I was living with my grandparents and him at the time. He passed away shortly after, and his cat he had for almost 30 years a few days after him. He was a good man.
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
Oof, the cat detail got me. It's like the cat said, "My watch has ended. I'll join you soon enough."
Hutt'nKloas 2 years ago (edited)
Some do get really old. I've met a few past their 20's. My best fluff friend reached the age of 21 before passing away.
Load More Replies... Robin Roper 2 years ago
Sounds like my father in law. He had landed on Omaha Beach in the first wave on men (29th Division), landed in the Incheon Invasion, and was a sniper in Vietnam (before we, the US, was officially there). After a few years of declining health, in his mid-80's on the way home from yet another appointment at the VA medical center, he told my husband "This isn't fun anymore; I don't want to do it anymore." My husband told me that night he had told his dad "Daddy, you never have to go back to the doctor if you don't want, you can do whatever you want to do." His dad responded with "I'm done." He died 4 days later. I'm proud of my father in law - he had integrity his entire live, all the way to the end.
#28
My grandma confessed to murder on her deathbed. Usually you’d think it was the pain relief, but she was such an eccentric it was actually believable. We traced all her ex-husbands, partners and any other likely candidates and fortunately no one was missing or died an untimely death, but sometimes I wonder...
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
My granny has been saying this before she had dementia. Claimed she hired a hitman to go after her ex-husband. My parents think it's a bad joke but I'm really not so sure...
Michael Largey 2 years ago
To be successful at murder, making it look like a natural timely death is exactly what you need to do. Perhaps the grandma managed that.
#29
I was a medic in the military and I worked in one hospital in Louisiana. I was assisting with a mature dependent wife at the end of a long battle with both dementia and cancer. Her last words were, "Damned, my pie must be burning!"
KDS 2 years ago (edited)
Depends on which side of the brain that the stroke happens.
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Mary Mosher 2 years ago
"Dr. Penfield ... I smell burnt toast!" Classic stroke symptom, the poor soul.
#30
My grandmother fell sick and it got worse in two weeks.
A few minutes before dying she said "shift me on the another bed and remove all these stuffs and open the doors, I'm leaving now."
#31
Not sure if this fits but here it is. I had a roommate, Ink, that was an ex con and he moved in with another friend of ours, Brad, that was a printer. Well they decided to counterfeit money and go on a road trip. When they got back Ink was contacted by the Secret Service, they "just wanted to talk to him". They had met at Denny's, Ink wanted me to wait in a nearby parking lot and watch what went down, they led him out of the restaurant in handcuffs. He called me quite a few times from Federal prisons while he was being transported and kept telling me to tell Brad not to worry, he'd take the fall and do the time. Nobody could find Brad, the police finally kicked his door in and found him dead. He had committed suicide and in his suicide note he took all of the blame and said Ink had nothing to do with it. The courts considered that a deathbed confession and Ink was let out of jail. Crazy stuff...
Charlie Taube 2 years ago
For those who wonder why the presidents body guard would be involved with counterfeiting arrests, the secret service is also in charge of stopping counterfeiting.
Victoria 2 years ago
Secret Service was given the Presidential detail after McKinley's assassination. There wasn't any other Government org with security concerns other than the Military, but they didn't want the Military to have more obligations, so it was given to the Secret Service which has always been a part of the Dept of Treasury. That was their original mission and the Presidential security detail was and is an add-on.
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#32
My great aunt passed away a couple of years ago. She was suffering from viral encephalitis and fluctuated in and out of consciousness. It was truly painful to watch. Although a lot of family tended to be around her in those last days, I once happened to be alone with her when she made some fairly odd remarks (which I kept to myself since).
On the day in question I was playing games on my phone in her hospital room when she started to audibly mutter to herself. It became more urgent and intense - eventually she explicitly called me to her side. Her eyes looked huge and confused, I doubt she knew who I was. She spat out her words, most of which were barely comprehensible, putting particular emphasis on 'boy' and 'ingredient'.
I sat there for 15 minutes, listening to her erratic account of, as I finally gathered, how she sometimes used to cook eggs in the urine of a stable boy (instead of water). She insisted that he was handsomely compensated for his services, but now and then she started to cry and couldn’t stop.
I googled this weeks later, and there indeed exists a traditional 'dish' in China described in the West as *Virgin boy egg*. Apparently this concept had fascinated her and she frequently recreated this herself and served it to her family (which sometimes included my younger self) without explaining what it was. I am not sure if she felt shame or enthusiasm about this (she often stammered something about 'the secret ingredient'), but it quite obviously haunted her towards the very end of her life.
HelluvaHedgehogAlien 2 years ago
As a Chinese person, I’m learning new stuff about ancient China stuff every day 😮
Kira Okah 2 years ago
It's not ancient, it's regional. Virgin eggs are still very much produced today.
Load More Replies... David 2 years ago
Well, I doubt it would harm you given any bacteria would likely be killed in the cooking process. But I don't understand the appeal. In a big picture way I get that Chinese (at least old school) believed in eating a lot of weird stuff, animal parts etc, assigning properties to them not supported by science. I've looked around some really weird shops in China / Hong Kong.
真壁まつり 2 years ago
Maybe not supported by science but based on experience and old medic books?
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bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
I call BS on the last part. I think I'd know if my eggs were boiled in urine.....
Moezzzz 2 years ago
It's an old tradition. Well, more like a delicacy (yeah, I know- bleghhh!!). And people paid big money for them, too, but now they sell for about .24£ and I read a story where people will eat them for every meal or at least once a day. Its supposed to help from arthritis to heat stroke. I couldn't find any scientific backing for the claims, but generally, it was the urine of a boy under the age of 10 (though, there's no real reason it has to be a boys urine, they've just always used young boy urine). Apparently it's HUGE in Dongyang, China.
#33
I didn't witness this personally as it was between my grandfather and his father. My great grandfather was not a nice man. He beat his children (one time he beat his daughter with a table leg) and I am assuming did the same to his wife. Anyway, she left him and the kids behind (this was the 30s and I am assuming that he didn't allow her to take the kids with her and its not like womens rights were great back then) my grandfather left home at 8 years old and fended for himself for his entire life. On his death bed nasty grandpa told the boys that he had a bunch of money stashed on the old property and if they went to see him, he would tell them where it was. No one went. Edit for clarity: nasty grandpa was my great grandfather.
DiscoqueenJ 2 years ago
That says a lot that no one was willing to see him, even with a possible reward. I always wonder what happened to people like that to make them such an intolerable person.
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
Guarantee there wasn't any money at all, just a trick because he knew no one would visit.
#34
My grandfather who had not been a religious man throughout his life stated on the second to last day he was alive that in the prior few nights he was seeing beings in the bedroom with him. He could not discern what they were but one in particular made him very fearful.
Seabeast 2 years ago
I wonder if he was losing his sight? Seeing people that aren't there is a common thing with Charles Bonnet syndrome. The brain creates images to compensate for the loss of visual input.
Michelle Reynolds 2 years ago
Perhaps it was actually angels- they are not the sweet cherubs of greeting cards and kinda scary!
Load More Replies... Colleen Glim 2 years ago
They only come for people important to history. Or witches and wizards
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Bob La Capra 2 years ago
On the 3rd day of my father's 5-day hospital stay, he started telling me about how the closet door opened and closed by itself at night and the wall tv turned into a bank vault and that the night nurse hung a fox from his IV rack. He was not on any medication that made him loopy and he talked of these things rationally. Needless to say I was a bit freaked. His doctor explained that quite often elderly patients who are in a hospital room without a view of the outside world will have delusions and that they would stop once he was home. The afternoon we went home he briefly talked about one of the delusions (his non-ambulatory roommate crawling to his bedside to discuss an escape plan) but has not since.
Peter Ledoux 2 years ago
I have an internal floater that I sometimes mistake for a bird in the distance. I also see double, beyond correction, and my eyes water half the day. The point is I see interesting things that my camera doesn't. I'm going to look up that syndrome.
#35
i was told about the layers of ego dissolving into oblivion, who you once thought you are is gone and now who you really are is exposed. told me death is an easy feat to conquer, laid back, looked me in the eyes and whispered “wow”...then died
2x4b523p 2 years ago
My grandma was nasty, nasty person. She never had kind word for anyone, all she cared about was getting her way and causing drama. Once Alzheimer took hold of her she was like a fairytale grandma. It was so weird hearing her genuinely laugh for the first time as an adult. Makes you wonder what made her so bitter and what family life could have been without it.
Michelle Reynolds 2 years ago
Long-term care and hospice nurse here- We were always shocked by the sweetest alzheimer's patients who had no family come to see them and then the reverse with a horrible patient having lots of family come and after talking to the families, some people completely reversed their personalities with alzheimers. Some good, some really bad.
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AliJanx 2 years ago
My sweet, funny, smart mom became cranky, more flirtatious, and a drinkin' woman. I had to learn how to deal with the changes without letting it get to me, but I knew these last few years were a trial. As she was in the hospital dying, she knew that I was hers and I had a brief moment of clarity with her. Such a blessing.
#36
Nothing dark, but unexpected for me:
I spent a lot of time with my 90-something-year-old grandfather in his final months. He was married to my grandmother for over 70 years and told me he never slept with any other woman. This was followed by him asking me what it was like to sleep with more than one person in your lifetime.
He (partially paralyzed from a stroke, at the end of his life) also told me, as he was waking up from a nap, that he was just dreaming about having sex with Betty Grable.
I never shared these details with my family.
#37
Germany, post WW2
Ruth is a young german, Feliçien, a French solider, falls head over heels - brought many thoughtful gifts, such as a big juicy ham for her family.
They marry. His family and friends are in the south of France, but they stay in Germany. He now goes by the name Felix.
They stay together, through several miscarriages, infertility. They never have children.
Ruth dies first, around 2010.
On her deathbed she tells him:
You know Felix - I always liked you, but I never loved you.
"Weisch Felix, I hän di immer gern g'habt, aber g'liebt hän i di nie."
#38
Not exactly a Deathbed confession but a day before. My grandmother passed away in 2013 and my Dad in 2014. We never told our great grand mother that my dad was no more (because of her mental state at that time). She mentioned she could have done more for her eldest child (my grandmother was 12 when she was married off to my grandfather) and that for the past few days my Dad is in the living room telling her it is time to go to our new home and that he is being very adamant today, she would pack her things tomorrow morning and would leave with him. She passed away the next day
Seabeast 2 years ago
Wait, what?! She married off her 12 year old daughter?! This sounds like the girl was raped and forced to marry her rapist to make her "an honest woman", or to protect the rapist from prison time. Like activist Sherry Johnson. ___ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sherry_Johnson
JoJo Anisko 2 years ago
During long stretches of history, very young girls were married off to grown men. I don't condone it, but it was "normal" for the times. My mother was her mother's fourth child; her mother died a few weeks later from complications at only sixteen years old.
Load More Replies... #39
This wasn't a death bed confession, but more of hospice. This man was an alcoholic, this isn't usually a problem because when in hospice you can get whatever you want as long as it is legal, but he was a violent drunk and was forbidden alcohol as a result. Anyways between his requests for alcohol, he talked about how he and a friend got into a massive fight about land and his equipment being borrowed, as a result they haven't spoken in 20 years.
He said he didnt even know why it was such a big deal and regretted being that aggressive. Basically said he missed his best friend and wished they didn't lose all those years.
#40
Helped care for my dad as he died from cancer earlier this year. He would get agitated and reach his arms out and try to sit up. The last thing he said was “f*****ck.” Not sure what it was referencing - pain, drugs, or war memories - but that stuck with me. He passed very peacefully in the end
#41
The last conversation I had with my Aunt Rose. She was manic depressive and during a visit to my dad’s house, she had a manic episode. When this happens, she talks non-stop, as fast as she can get the words out. She told me she felt my dad harbored resentment against her because her sister got my grandfather killed. My grandfather used to do “the numbers” in the LES in the 1970’s. He would have a lot of cash on him in the bars late at night. Her sister was a junkie, knew this, and had him set up to be robbed. During the robbery gramps got stabbed and ended up dying several months later from sepsis. He did shoot both the assailants, although I am unsure of their outcomes. I only knew he was murdered, but they always kept the details from me.
#42
A couple of days before my grandmother passed away she was really confused and was talking about my mother having a child a year or so after my own birth that was sent for adoption. She was talking about how sad and horrible this was and that I deserved to know. After my grandmother passed I confronted my mom about it and she neglected this, and I truly believed her. Couple of months later it turns out my grandmother was the one adopting away a baby girl who was born between my mother and aunt.
Josh 2 years ago
I feel like it reads better if "neglected" reads "denied" but that's a hell of a typo.
bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
Feel fortunate. When my great grandma was in her final weeks, so came home on hospice, except we couldn't really afford staff. Her daughters cared for her. She became impacted with feces(may not wanna Google). As my grandma and aunt were trying to clear it, my great grandma was bearing down and pushing. Afterwards, she began to say things that made the rest of the family think she had given birth a time that no one else knew about that ended in stillbirth or adoption.
#43
I wasn’t there to witness her confession, but the story leading up to it is intriguing. My mom was adopted, and my grandparents never kept it a secret, they loved my mom like their own. When she was growing up, she tried to find out as much as she could about her and her adopted brother’s birth parents. Back in those days though, info like that wasn’t exactly the easiest to find. My mom and uncle were brought to the orphanage with little to info on each of their biological parents, or was else wise requested to be kept secret. Eventually, my mom found enough info from notes she had gathered; like which families might have been most likely to be related to her, some property info one can find at the library, and she just sort of pieced this puzzle together over her life. At a certain point, she was able to get the names of her mother and her brother’s mother. She was able to find out she was part of a big family, with lots of brothers and sisters. But, for my uncle, he found out that his mother had died not long after placing him for adoption. By the time she had gathered all of this info and found this much out, my mom was married, had my older sister and was pregnant with me. I can’t remember exactly what it was she found that lead to it, or if she heard something from someone, but she got a phone number. That phone number went to the house of her biological mother. She called, and the voice of a young boy answered, my mom asked for the name she knew and she hears, “yeah one second... *hey Mom, phones for you*” My mom and her mom talk. It wasn’t an easy conversation, and I’m just gonna refer to my mom’s mom as bio-gran from here. Bio-gran is not comfortable with my mom contacting her, at all. She doesn’t ask my mom a lot of questions, but my mom says that she was just gonna talk and if bio-gran wanted to hang up at any point, she could. My mom just gave her a short version of the story of her life, and then the conversation was over. Bio-gran after that, would send letters to my mom on occasion, but bio-gran made a point of telling my mom she could never be found out by the rest of her family. And bio-gran carried that secret with her until the day of her death. One of her daughters asked her, “Will you tell us where you went, when you went away that time?” And bio-gran finally confessed, she had gone to a home for unwed mothers all those years ago to have my mom, the child of her affair. I’ve met two of my bio-aunts, and sadly both of them passed a few years ago. But dang. tldr; my biological grandmother had an affair with a milkman, left to go to a home for unwed mothers, had a child, did not tell her family until her deathbed.
Shelli Aderman 2 years ago
“They loved my mom like their own.” She WAS their own. Children who are adopted are adopted by their REAL parents. Bio parents are amazing humans who want more for the child they birth. And as much as the adoption story involves grief, it’s important to remember that the majority of children who are adopted are loved by even more folks-ALL of the people who have a hand in placing a child up for adoption love and care about the child so very much.
#44
A family friend was taking care of an elderly aunt. I forget what health issues she had, but one day she got up and started putting on her slippers and just getting ready. When asked what she was doing she said “I’m just getting ready to see Jesus”. She died maybe 4 hours later. Edit: got lost in the comments. While not a confession just eerie last conversations with people.
#45
I had an uncle who was a heavy drinker and just known for being a bit crazy (wild, not mentally unwell although I suspect the latter was also true). Anyway at one family party, the morning after a mattress in the house was found stinking of p**s - no one knew who the culprit was and he naturally got the blame though he vehemently denied it. His last words on his deathbed were “it wasn’t me that pissed the bed!” So it clearly bothered him for years that he had been blamed for this (a minor thing compared to many things he had done!)
#46
Not really a deathbed confession but the last thing i heard my grandma say. My grandma had dementia and was really going through a tough time, staying in bed forever and just not having a good life. Me and my dad went to visit her one day when we went to our grandpa's funeral. We started talking to her and she had no clue who my dad was, last thing im pretty sure me and my dad both heard from her was "well im not sure who you are but you have nice teeth". She most likely didnt even know that her husband was the one who was being put into the grave.
#47
Not a confession, just passing thoughts. I moved away for uni when my grandma fell ill, and she rapidly declined (6 months from diagnosis to death). In her last few weeks, it was around easter and I was so busy with work/school and I hadn't heard from her, so I called her and managed to have a 1 minute and 34 second conversation with her before she became tired and said goodbye. That night, I saw her in my dreams waving to me with a suitcase in her hands, and when I woke up I knew she had passed. When my mum called me that morning to let me know, she said that in the last 3 weeks of her sickness, I was the only person she'd gained enough strength to talk to, and they think she was holding on until I called :(
DiscoqueenJ 2 years ago
The night my grandfather died, I was 16, I dreamed he came to me and told me goodbye and to take are of my mother (she was recently separated). I promised him I would but begged him not to go. He waved at me and faded away. Moments later, I woke up to the phone ringing. I heard my mom answer. She came in my room and said he had passed. I rolled over and whispered "I know" and just cried. It was spooky and comforting at the same time.
#48
My grandfather passed away from dementia about 10 years ago. He didn't seem to know that my grandma, my mom, and my dad were in the room with us. He looked right at me with a sad look I'd never seen him give, and he begged me to not waste my life like he had done. My grandma mostly kept her composure, but I could tell it added more pain to an already painful time. Unfortunately, though I promised him I wouldn't, I knew even back then that I would never be able to do anything except waste my life. Still true now. I broke a promise to my grandpa the moment I made it.
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
You are only wasting your life if you're voluntarily spending time on things you don't enjoy.
#49
My grandmother admitted she didn't like my haircut.
Shark Lady 2 years ago
Mine certainly did! My cousin hated having her hair brushed, I think it was sensory overload, I still remember my gran attacking cousin's hair as she was too embarrassed to be seen with such an unkempt granddaughter. My poor cousin was in hysterics at the end of the torture.
Load More Replies... #50
The last two things my grandfather told me was that when he was a kid he and his mother would throw big stones on cars from a bridge and he also told me about how much better looking the lady that delivered bread to his family was compared to my grandma
RomanceRadish 2 years ago
Kid AND HIS MOTHER?! Abhorrent behavior from both, but especially the adult.
Glengoolie Blue 2 years ago
Your grandfather and his mother threw stones on cars? There were cars then?
#51
A 92 year old man confessed that he had a affair lasting 13 years
Shark Lady 2 years ago
Sometimes it's better to keep your mouth shut, finding out about an affair and grieving at the same time must be awful.
#52
I was with a family member before he passed, not really a confession but he was on some serious medication and told me about the weird stuff he was seeing as he was dying. Said he could see people crawling out of the lights in the room and when he fell asleep he told me he was standing in a field with a hurricane passing over him. He told me, "I don't want to die." He was dead the next day.
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What do you think ?
BatPhace 2 years ago
All of this is why assisted euthanasia should be legal everywhere. I'm sorry, but I'm not waiting for Alzheimer's or dementia to rob me of my self or my family. Let people die with dignity ffs
Victoria 2 years ago
With you on this. Dementia and related causes are my nightmare. Especially since I found out I have an increased risk for late onset Alzheimer's.
Load More Replies...
Leo Domitrix 2 years ago
Medical personnel hear doozies. My great-grandma, however, went down with these immortal words to her nurse: "F*ck you!" And that explains that side of the family.
Wintermute 2 years ago
My uncle died of alzhiemers and spent the last month or so in a violent fugue that I often had to go protect my aunt from, which was weird cuz he was the most teddy bear kind of guy alive. He was a cop for 30 years and would frequently relive his most tragic encounters. The worst I heard was "how could you do those things to that kid" yelled into an empty room. He was known for always being the soft spoken cop that rarely drew his gun and always gave second chances, but I think after 30 years of seeing the worst of people, all that pent up anger was finally coming to the surface. He went to a home and died 2 weeks later.
Phobrek 2 years ago
Not a deathbed confession, but I'm reminded of the time my mom was in a long-term care facility. She was recovering (that time) but many patients were spending their last days in that place. I would visit every other day, at that point, and would spend a fair bit of time in a rec room that went largely unused. Several times, though, the staff would wheel this old guy into the room, for a change of scenery perhaps, or to give his roommate a break. He would call out randomly, loudly, often. Likely had dementia. Shared space with this guy several times. At first, his most common utterances were: "oh, Ed!" "Awww, Ed!" "Ohhh, Eddie! Oh no!" And that was about it. But on further days, more of the same, and "Aw, Eddie! We're f****d!" "Aw, Ed, what'd we do! Aw no!" "We're gonna go ta jail!" And finally, on another day, "awww Ed! We shouldna sold guns ta those guys! Oh god, Eddie, what did we do?!!" No way to know if this was anything from the man's life, or just imagined.
EmBree 2 years ago
Last words about chocolate: My MIL said, "I want chocolate". She was diabetic and died from cancer. My great-great-grandfather said, "But it was worth it!" He was hospitalized for diabetes complications and bribed one of the other patients to get him a big bag of chocolate. His children scolded him for it and he smiled and said his last words.
Carla Phillips 2 years ago
I wish I hadn't read these. I have a hard enough time not crying on the best of days
Flowers 2 years ago
It's OK to cry, tears are just a physical manifestation of your empathy. Go watch something funny, laugh and raise your vibrational level. ;)
Load More Replies... Illustrious G 2 years ago
My grandma, in one of her last days, told me, “You have a big nose!” Soon after, she told me, “You should go to bed with a lot of good-looking men!” This was my very reserved, kind grandma who NEVER spoke about that type of thing. I still laugh thinking back on it!
A B C the Third 2 years ago (edited)
Interesting. When I first clicked this post, the title teaser pic showed something about a grandfather who "accidentally [fúcked] (there, I changed it back, BP) with another man". Apparently that was too much for the BP censor's virgin mind. (/edit: they changed "[slept] with" to "had sex with", that's why I couldn't find it by searching for keywords)
BatPhace 2 years ago
All of this is why assisted euthanasia should be legal everywhere. I'm sorry, but I'm not waiting for Alzheimer's or dementia to rob me of my self or my family. Let people die with dignity ffs
Victoria 2 years ago
With you on this. Dementia and related causes are my nightmare. Especially since I found out I have an increased risk for late onset Alzheimer's.
Load More Replies... Leo Domitrix 2 years ago
Medical personnel hear doozies. My great-grandma, however, went down with these immortal words to her nurse: "F*ck you!" And that explains that side of the family.
Wintermute 2 years ago
My uncle died of alzhiemers and spent the last month or so in a violent fugue that I often had to go protect my aunt from, which was weird cuz he was the most teddy bear kind of guy alive. He was a cop for 30 years and would frequently relive his most tragic encounters. The worst I heard was "how could you do those things to that kid" yelled into an empty room. He was known for always being the soft spoken cop that rarely drew his gun and always gave second chances, but I think after 30 years of seeing the worst of people, all that pent up anger was finally coming to the surface. He went to a home and died 2 weeks later.
Phobrek 2 years ago
Not a deathbed confession, but I'm reminded of the time my mom was in a long-term care facility. She was recovering (that time) but many patients were spending their last days in that place. I would visit every other day, at that point, and would spend a fair bit of time in a rec room that went largely unused. Several times, though, the staff would wheel this old guy into the room, for a change of scenery perhaps, or to give his roommate a break. He would call out randomly, loudly, often. Likely had dementia. Shared space with this guy several times. At first, his most common utterances were: "oh, Ed!" "Awww, Ed!" "Ohhh, Eddie! Oh no!" And that was about it. But on further days, more of the same, and "Aw, Eddie! We're f****d!" "Aw, Ed, what'd we do! Aw no!" "We're gonna go ta jail!" And finally, on another day, "awww Ed! We shouldna sold guns ta those guys! Oh god, Eddie, what did we do?!!" No way to know if this was anything from the man's life, or just imagined.
EmBree 2 years ago
Last words about chocolate: My MIL said, "I want chocolate". She was diabetic and died from cancer. My great-great-grandfather said, "But it was worth it!" He was hospitalized for diabetes complications and bribed one of the other patients to get him a big bag of chocolate. His children scolded him for it and he smiled and said his last words.
Carla Phillips 2 years ago
I wish I hadn't read these. I have a hard enough time not crying on the best of days
Flowers 2 years ago
It's OK to cry, tears are just a physical manifestation of your empathy. Go watch something funny, laugh and raise your vibrational level. ;)
Load More Replies... Illustrious G 2 years ago
My grandma, in one of her last days, told me, “You have a big nose!” Soon after, she told me, “You should go to bed with a lot of good-looking men!” This was my very reserved, kind grandma who NEVER spoke about that type of thing. I still laugh thinking back on it!
A B C the Third 2 years ago (edited)
Interesting. When I first clicked this post, the title teaser pic showed something about a grandfather who "accidentally [fúcked] (there, I changed it back, BP) with another man". Apparently that was too much for the BP censor's virgin mind. (/edit: they changed "[slept] with" to "had sex with", that's why I couldn't find it by searching for keywords)
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