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33 Offhanded Comments That Ended Up Changing Lives And No One Saw It Coming
Interview With Expert
It's strange to think that some of the simplest things you say to a person can actually have a massive impact on them. You might just say it in passing without knowing what’s going on in that person’s life, and it can turn into a life lesson for the listener.
When Reddit user Routine-Max asked folks, “What insignificant thing did someone say that stuck with you forever?” they came up with numerous answers. While some are quite thought-provoking, some might bring an endearing smile on your face as you think about how incredible humans can be. Just scroll down to check them out!
More info: Reddit
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#1
I was at a small game con and my friend was filling out my stick on name badge. He asked me if he should use Will or William* and I said “Will is fine”
So he wrote “Will is fine” on the badge as a joke.
This was at a time in my life where I went though a traumatic job lose and was in a really bad place.
I had a really good time at the con and when I got home stuck that name tag on my bathroom mirror. “Will is fine” became a sort of daily affirmation and genuinely helped me through the next few weeks. Reminded me of that day and that I have good friend and am still worthy of feeling fine.
*names have been changed.
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#2
Was working a sales job a few years ago, and the top seller at this store was such an upstanding great guy, never pushy, always understanding, even in his personal life he was genuinely just a fantastic person,
while training me, he dealt with an extremely rude customer, but handled it like a champ; after they left i asked why he put up with treatment like that, and he said “Always be nice to people, you may be the only kindness they see” and it will never leave my mind.
Earonn - 4 days ago
It's probably a good stance, but I just can't. If someone behaves s****y, I just can't reward them with kindness. Somewhere in the back of my mind people with s****y behaviour are all bullies who will only stop when you make it to 'costly' / painful for them to continue. Kudos to all who make such people better by being nice to them.
#3
My father was dying of stage 4 pancreatic cancer. He went from 190lbs to 115lbs within months. One of the last conversations I had with him has been haunting me. I walked in his room and I asked him...
"How are you, dad?"
"Oh...just....laying here dying"
We both burst into tears at the same time. Composed ourselves. He paused. Stared off into space and said "...I had a good run".
That was months ago. I think about that every single day.
Once, my literature professor said, "It's ok to have your heart broken because no matter how hard it hurts, you don't die. Then you realize nobody is more important than you." She was just talking about a character in a novel, but those words are eternally tattooed on my heart, to be honest.
That's the power of words, I guess; what might be insignificant for the speaker can enrapture the listener in a strange way. To understand the psyche behind this bizarrely human phenomenon, Bored Panda got in touch with Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She explained that even if a comment is minor, if it’s received during a vulnerable or emotionally charged moment, it can stick.
#4
My father, who had lung cancer needed some things from the grocery store. Among other things, I brought him a 4 pack of razors for shaving. He looked at the pack and said, “This is great, you got me a lifetime supply of razors”. We both laughed. It was true. Love you Dad….
Michelle C 4 days ago
Humor truly is a healthy way to cope, in general and I’m glad he was able to find something amusing in his pain. May he rest in peace.
#6
While browsing on reddit one night someone asked if it was a problem that he was a virgin at 38. He seemed pretty down about it. Someone posted "It's not a problem unless you make it a problem". And I now repeat that to myself everytime I am experiencing a challenging situation.
"The hippocampus (responsible for memory) and the amygdala (which processes emotions) work together to encode experiences. If a comment is tied to a strong emotional reaction, even subconsciously, it’s more likely to be stored in long-term memory. So, neurological factors can also turn seemingly insignificant comments into lasting memories," Prof. Lobo explained.
She also elaborated that people remember information better when they can relate it to themselves. As per her, even a minor positive remark that aligns with someone's self-concept or struggles can become deeply ingrained, and this, in turn, can contribute to long-term self-esteem and mindset changes.
#7
Whenever we'd leave my Grandma's, she'd always say "*you know you can always come to Grandma's house*". The love she had given to me is a love I'll never experience again. I miss her so much.
R.A. Haley 4 days ago
Both my grandparents lived down the street from me I could always walk down a couple of doirs to see them. My grandson lives four states away from me, and it breaks my heart that he will never have the kind of relationship with me that I had with my grandparents.
#8
“Is it important?”
“It’s as important as you want it to be”
It’s helped me gain perspective on a lot of things.
Calvin Smelliott 3 days ago
Prioritize and don't pour energy into something that isn't worth it. 👍🏻
#9
I used to help this old cowboy with his firewood, he was broken and tired in his 90s he turned to me, I was lifting a particularly large round, not enough I couldn't handle but heavy, he said 'put that down, sit' so I sat on it and he said 'please don't ever do things on your own that's worth another helping, ask for help' I've incorperated that into everything, I am no longer ashamed to ask for help, either lifting something or mentally struggling, I ask. Thanks, Bill. I miss ya, ya old cowboy.
Our expert also narrated that while a single comment might not completely transform self-esteem, repeated small positive remarks can accumulate and reinforce long-term positive identity and mindset shifts. "They act as mental anchors, emotional support, and confidence builders, influencing how individuals see themselves and approach challenges in life," she added.
Prof. Lobo believes that seemingly insignificant remarks can act as mental bookmarks or perspective shifters, sometimes influencing a listener in ways the speaker never intended. She thinks that whether it’s a fleeting comment about life’s unpredictability or a cliché about resilience, these remarks can linger, resurface in key moments, and subtly shape someone’s outlook over time.
#10
I think it’s an old quote but my step dad told me when I was young “To get things you have never had, you need to do things you have never done.”.
R.A. Haley 4 days ago
I think it was Zig Ziglar who said: " If you want they've got, you've got to do what they do." Meaning; if you want what someone else has, you've got to do the same thing they did to get it. I take that as a cautionary note, because you'd have to do *everything* they did, even the terrible things, the painful things, to get it. Would it be worth it?
#11
In my twenties I made fun of my friend for not knowing some band or song. She sarcastically replied, “oh we don’t like the exact same music, I guess we can’t be friends” and that literally changed my entire perspective on music snobbery.
Sky Render 4 days ago
Diversity is the core of a solid friendship! You can share what you love with one another and broaden one another's horizons that way.
#12
Nothing will ruin your your 20s more than thinking you should have your life completely together in your 20s.
Uncle Panda 4 days ago
I've considered running for public office just so that some investigative reporter will piece together my 20s. I have questions.
She also emphasized that it's a fact that humans are naturally wired to seek meaning, even in the most casual conversations. According to her, when an offhand remark aligns with our current emotional state or personal struggles, it can feel profound, even if the speaker didn’t intend it that way.
Prof. Lobo beautifully explained this through an example: "A phrase like 'Life is too short to worry about things you can't control' might sound cliché in everyday conversation. However, if someone hears it while going through a breakup, a career setback, or a stressful situation, it suddenly feels deeply relevant and meaningful."
#13
I’m Chinese. I stayed in NYC for an internship. I was in line to order a pizza at a Washington Heights neighborhood. This 5 year old kid asked me “Do you know Kung Fu?” His dad had this “oh s**t! My son said something racist!” Look. I found it so funny that I immediately was smiling. It broke the tension. The lil’ dude was so cute. I remembered him sitting by the window and he knocked to wave goodbye.
#14
When my dad was teaching me to drive, I pulled up too quickly to a stop sign and stomped on the brakes, bringing us to an abrupt stop at just the last possible moment. My dad calmly turned to me and said, “You sure do trust this car.”
I don’t think he intended it as anything but a comment on my burgeoning driving skills, but I’ve had that phrase pop into my head often since that day, whenever I find myself making plans that count on things I can’t control. I hope he knows that he’s saved me from heartache and headache a thousand times over, but also…
Sometimes, you just gotta’ trust the car.
#15
Random girl at church when I was complaining about staining my new choir shirt with food:
Her- Was the food good?
Me- I guess yeah...
Her- Then it was worth it.
Robert Trebor 3 days ago
My pastor used to joke about needing to keep his neckties in the refrigerator because of the food on them. Spared most of his shirts, too.
Well, looks like it all comes down to what situation the listener is in and that's how the words they hear take shape and carry weight. Now, I am wondering what was going on in my mind when my professor's words stuck with me forever. Anyway, now we want to hear from you.
Have you had similar instances where someone's insignificant words stuck with you? Feel free to share them with us in the comments. Also, don't forget to upvote your favorite ones on this list!
#16
When my dad was dying of cancer I was visiting him in the hospital and we were talking about how his cell phone was acting up. He was saying how there is no point in getting a new one anyway and how he will never get a new car again and other "new" things again and then just kinda paused with tears in his eyes and said "I don't want to die, y'know" before changing the subject to something more positive. He was so strong through all of it but seeing the facade crack for a second there put a weight in my chest I've never felt before and probably won't again.
Sky Render 4 days ago
Unfortunately you will feel that again. That's the weight of knowing mortality (your own or others, it hardly matters which), or "existential dread" as they call it now.
#17
One of my friends at the time who I held so closely to my heart said "See you only see yourself when you walk past your reflections in store windows and car doors, how lucky am I to get to look at you whenever I want." We haven't spoken in 2 years, but I think about that every time I feel bad about myself.
Brian Droste 3 days ago
Maybe it is time you two reconnect. If you don't have your friends phone number, try to connect through the internet.
#18
One time I was clothes shopping with a friend & I had recently gained weight, so I was feeling insecure. I came out of the dressing room to show my friend this sweater & there was another lady out there (I think she was waiting for her daughter to try on clothes if I remember right). This lady tells me that blue is my color & I looked so good. I will always remember that💙.
Robert Trebor 3 days ago
I saw a lovely mother and adult daughter having lunch where I was eating. The daughter had Downs. They were dressed alike and were having a wonderful time, and I couldn't resist, so I went over and told them how lovely they both were. The mother thanked me, and her daughter just glowed.
#19
In HS I was complaining about how fast the year had gone by, to another friend. Middle aged dude (stranger) was standing near by and said ‘it will only get faster….’ I’m 50 now and I’ve thought about that comment almost daily since. Utter wisdom. I could pick him out of a lineup if given the chance today. That’s how clear that memory stays with me.
Uncle Panda 4 days ago
It's like flipping through the pages of a book. The closer you get to the end, they faster they go.
#20
Cousin told me he didn't have one bad memory of me and always wanted to be like me when he was younger. Which hit hard as s**t as I was always trying to be like him when I was younger.
#21
Don't believe anything you hear and only half of what you see. It's served me well for 45 years.
#22
When you retire, retire TO something; not FROM something.
When you get close to the age, you’ll get it.
Babs McGurk 3 days ago
Having just retired after 24 years in the same job, I can honestly say that sometimes you truly need to retire FROM something before you can determine what you are retiring TO. And sometimes you need to give yourself time to recover from the physical and mental exhaustion of a job that just got to be too much over the years, before you figure out what the rest of your life is going to look like.
#23
“Don’t make fun of me.” A girl with a speech impediment that I was making fun of in junior high. I’ve never made fun of a person’s speaking ability again.
#24
"You arguing? I don't think it's you mate."
My boss after he'd pulled me aside because I was withdrawn and quiet at work. I told him I was arguing with my partner of the time. This offhand comment referencing and confirming my easy-going, placid nature was the beginning of the realisation that I was in an a*****e relationship. It took me a few years to get out, but I did.
#25
I had a bus driver in elementary school - I remember she would say, "Slow your roll, power ranger" a few times while driving us. To this day, when a car is going to fast around me, I still say it.
#26
Somebody once told me " it's okay to tell people to f**k off, they might not like it but it could make you happier".
#27
After I told someone I walked up the stairs at work for exercise:
- It only works if you do it every day
I think about it every day now as I walk up the stairs.
Enlee Jones 4 days ago
Once you GET in shape, you have to STAY in shape....which totally blows. -grumble-
#28
My partner and I spent 5 years trying for a baby, my “friend” told me “oh you’re just not praying hard enough”.
It was insignificant to them, but pretty awful for us.
I guess I didn’t pray hard enough to this day, I’ve still not been blessed with any children.
#29
“No matter what happens, I’ll always love you.” (My college girlfriend as we were breaking up, 1992).
Michael Largey 3 days ago (edited)
Despite a a husband and three children, my college girl kept writing me for two decades. Without anything I could reply to, sadly.
#30
When I was a teen, a trusted adult told me his mother was in the hospital and someone in the group asked if she was going to die and he said "We all are, eventually"
And for whatever reason that's stuck with me and reframes my perspective on things from time to time.
#31
My mother and father are still together. Not happy.
When I was about 16 the fighting got real bad and my mother was alone, crying. Tried to comfort her and she said through tears that it was me. That I was conceived before they were married.
That she married him to be a good mother and she wonders if she would be happier if she hadn’t.
I’ve never really confronted them about this but I have sort of been holding onto the blame for their failed marriage and s****y lives for a long time.
Uncle Panda 4 days ago
She was wrong. It's their fault they got pregnant. You didn't do anything.
#32
Never make decisions when you’re tired, and you can tell someone not to put their hand in the fire, but if they do it anyway, you can’t control it.
Uncle Panda 4 days ago
"Never mail a letter in anger, never sign a contract in joy" ~ Old Chinese saying
#33
Mainly things from elementary school years since I’m not as impacted these days by words.
“Your mouth looks funny when you laugh” - I have never laughed without a hand covering my mouth since then.
From my best friend - “Ew your legs are so meaty” - I think this comment deadass kickstarted my ED journey throughout my life. I was also maybe 100lbs at the time of this comment I just had thicker thighs than my friends.
Beak Hookage 4 days ago (edited)
People need to understand that children are sponges. They WILL absorb everything you say to them, sometimes for life. I was called (and made to feel) stupid for a good chunk of my early life and 30 years later with a Master's Degree under my belt, I still think of myself as a dumb*ss.
Poll Question
Do you believe minor things can have a big impact on people's lives?
Absolutely, sometimes things just ring true
It really depends on what and when something is said
Rarely, most times only big actions have big impact
I'd say not at all
What do you think ?
Mrs.C 4 days ago
"you don't have to marry him." I broke up with him a few days later. It's been 30ish years and I think about that advice. We weren't on the verge of marriage, but the advice giver knew me well enough to know I'd stick around and let him ruin my life. I'm so thankful I listened to her.
G Bono 3 days ago
The month comes quick, my grandmother said, and she was right. I think about her each time I pay my rent and bills.
OpheliaPoe 3 days ago
As a parent the saying, 'The days are long but the years are short." Was particularly helpful to hear. You may have a rough day with your child but someday you'll back and wonder how the years seemed to fly by so quickly.
Mrs.C 4 days ago
"you don't have to marry him." I broke up with him a few days later. It's been 30ish years and I think about that advice. We weren't on the verge of marriage, but the advice giver knew me well enough to know I'd stick around and let him ruin my life. I'm so thankful I listened to her.
G Bono 3 days ago
The month comes quick, my grandmother said, and she was right. I think about her each time I pay my rent and bills.
OpheliaPoe 3 days ago
As a parent the saying, 'The days are long but the years are short." Was particularly helpful to hear. You may have a rough day with your child but someday you'll back and wonder how the years seemed to fly by so quickly.
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