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When we think about stereotypes, girls are supposed to be the clean ones. In our collective minds, women are cleaning and tidying up in the house and urging their significant others to do the same. In reality, we can be as messy and gross as the guys. It's exhausting to keep a pristine home, so we dabble in the occasional weaponized incompetence, too.

We've compiled a selection of the most hilarious, irritating, and vexing pics of boyfriends and husbands coming across the messes that their girlfriends or wives made. Some of them include nasty habits – others are just fun quirks. But the bottom line is this: we can all be messy and weird, and the best way to approach it is probably with a healthy dose of humor.

Bored Panda asked Clinical Psychologist Forrest Talley, Ph.D., to weigh in. Do men and women get annoyed by different things? Does a messy environment infuriate only one gender? And how can two people who live together differentiate between what's a minor inconvenience and what's a deeper issue? Talley kindly agreed to tell us more about these problems.

#1

My Girlfriend Throws Her Daily Contact Lenses Behind The Headboard Of Our Bed

My Girlfriend Throws Her Daily Contact Lenses Behind The Headboard Of Our Bed

FireRotor Report

Whether a person is tidy or messy doesn't depend solely on their gender. But it does play a role, Clinical Psychologist Forrest Talley tells Bored Panda.

"Although there is a great deal of variability between individuals (both men and women) regarding what infuriates them about a romantic partner's behavior and how intensely they become annoyed, there appears to be some trends associated with each sex."

He points out a study by ter Laak, Olthof, & Aleva (2003). "[It] suggests that men become more frustrated by behaviors that threaten their autonomy (e.g., jealousy, moodiness in a partner), and women become more annoyed by [their] partner's behaviors that threaten the relationship (e.g., condescension, aggression, and emotional distance/neglect)."

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#2

I've Watched My Partner Pick Her Nose While She Drives But Never Made The Connection Of Where She Wipes Her Snot Until I Drove Her Car

I've Watched My Partner Pick Her Nose While She Drives But Never Made The Connection Of Where She Wipes Her Snot Until I Drove Her Car

chichi-lover Report

#3

This Is How My Wife Leaves A Dish After Taking It Out Of The Oven And Walking Away. We Have Children And A Dog

This Is How My Wife Leaves A Dish After Taking It Out Of The Oven And Walking Away. We Have Children And A Dog

TeriasP Report

Living together can cause friction between two romantic partners. It's natural. But the key to a successful relationship can sometimes be knowing what really matters and what doesn't. If partners can differentiate between minor irritations and real issues, they might enjoy a more successful relationship in the long run. But how can they do that?

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Talley says there are three important things to consider: 

  • Does the annoying behavior occur because your love interest does not care about the impact [it] has on you, or is it due to a personal quirk, an unintentional habit?
  • Is your reaction to the behavior reasonable? In other words, is it really a 'you' problem? Let's be honest; all of us are capable of overreacting.
  • No matter your answers to Questions One and Two, ask yourself whether the annoying behavior [is] something you can imagine living with long term. For example, if every time he eats something, the love of your life smacks his lips loudly and slurps, can you imagine sitting across the table listening to that for years upon years?
#4

My Wife Putting This Peanut Butter In The Trash Because "It's Empty"

My Wife Putting This Peanut Butter In The Trash Because "It's Empty"

reddit.com Report

#5

This Was My Wife's "Trash Pile" From Destemming The Strawberries

This Was My Wife's "Trash Pile" From Destemming The Strawberries

OuterSpacePotatoMann Report

#6

The Way My Wife Cuts Tomatoes

The Way My Wife Cuts Tomatoes

flerbergerber Report

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It's all about choosing your battles, he explains. "If the behavior appears innocent and harms nothing other than your sense of annoyance, try to let it go. No relationship is perfect, and every good relationship is packed to the brim with compromise and forgiveness."

"At the same time," Talley goes on, "know your limits and realize that those things that annoy you today will very likely annoy you five years from now. On balance, consider all the qualities of the person you are with and weigh this against how disruptive the annoying behavior is to your relationship. The results of this comparison will tell you whether to put energy into making changes or simply let it go."

#7

My Wife Doesn't Throw Her Trash Away Before Putting Her Dish In The Sink, So I Often End Up With This

My Wife Doesn't Throw Her Trash Away Before Putting Her Dish In The Sink, So I Often End Up With This

notanalien000 Report

#8

How My Girlfriend Has Her Car Every Time She Visits

How My Girlfriend Has Her Car Every Time She Visits

NeedsMoreBunGuns Report

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#9

My Wife Leaves Her Used Floss There For The Next Day

My Wife Leaves Her Used Floss There For The Next Day

itsokmomma Report

In addition to being inaccurate, stereotypes about which gender is tidier don't benefit either of them. Then one group are slobs, and the other has to face constant pressure to be 'the clean ones.' Is there any evidence to support the claims that either men or women are cleaner?

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A 2012 study found that men's office desks tend to be "consistently more contaminated." Other research in the past has also suggested that men wash their hands and brush their teeth less than women do. And that's especially true when it comes to using the bathroom. A 2013 study revealed that only 77% of men whom the researchers observed at the Michigan State University campus washed their hands after using the bathroom.

#10

My Wife Never Fully Screws The Lids Back Onto Anything

My Wife Never Fully Screws The Lids Back Onto Anything

EchoJXTV Report

#11

My Wife Puts Her Hairballs Anywhere But The Trash Can

My Wife Puts Her Hairballs Anywhere But The Trash Can

Historical_Air_8997 Report

#12

The Way My Wife Opens Things

The Way My Wife Opens Things

theDaninDanger Report

What were the numbers for women? Considerably better. 93% of women washed their hands after a visit to the bathroom. Out of those who washed their hands, 50% of men used soap, compared to 78% of women. And here's the bad news for all: only 5% of all people the researchers observed washed their hands long enough to kill all germs.

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Another interesting phenomenon comes to light when we look at what cleanliness factors people say are important to them. Interestingly, both men and women (98%) agree that washing their hands after using the toilet is important. But only 84% of men believe this habit is very important, while the percentage for women is much higher – 91%.

#13

How My Wife Puts Away The Cutlery

How My Wife Puts Away The Cutlery

FGGF Report

Add photo comments
POST
mommamarmar
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm less concerned with the randomness than the DIRTY KNIFE.

Mike D
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is it too much effort to sort things?? Maybe explain sorting saves time when you next need something

Diane H
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would make my spouse take it out and do it right while I watch.

J
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She only knows what she knows. My ex would put cups in the sink with milk and an ice cube . Why, because her lazy, worthless father taught to do this so the milk wouldn't dry before the cup was loaded in the DW. I told her, :Why don't you just rinse out the cup and load it into the dishwasher, or put it back into the sink instead? This instead of having it sit in the sink with a little amount of water

Marki Campbell
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just took the divider out and have a massively integrated silverware drawer

Clover
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This looks like it must be just the tip of the iceberg.

All's Gravy
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Remove all the cutlery from her access. You wouldn't let a child get away with that.

Learissa
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This would drive me insane... i hate when stuff is not organized.

Joy Myers
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe when someone cuts themselves on the sharp knife, things will change…not to mention it looks grody.

Mike F
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a roommate who used to do this. Never could make the idiot understand that sorting it when you put it away was so much simpler than this mess.

MotherRobinson
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG! This is madness! I get on my kids about this all the time. My six year old gets it tho.

Vermonta
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's called sick of house chores, heck with it, it's in the correct drawer. I put mine away nicely but some days I just feel like dumping the dishwasher rack of utensils in the drawer. But I don't.

Justin Rogers
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good lord 2 of everything. Solved this with a jar on the counter

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#14

I Think I Married A Sociopath. The Way My Wife Uses Her Magnesium Supplements

I Think I Married A Sociopath. The Way My Wife Uses Her Magnesium Supplements

rubber_otter Report

#15

Every Time My Girlfriend Gets Drunk

Every Time My Girlfriend Gets Drunk

Panderverse Report

The same trend follows throughout the rest of the poll. More women than men believe that changing undergarments and clothes and washing hands after using public transportation are crucial behaviors. The same goes for habits like sanitizing mobile devices, living spaces, and work spaces: only about a third of men find these practices to be important.

However, just because women say that cleaner spaces and personal hygiene matter to them greatly doesn't mean that they are, in fact, tidier or that they have better personal hygiene.

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Susan Michie, health psychology professor and director of the Centre for Behavior Change at the Department of Clinical, Educational, and Health Psychology at University College London, believes that such behaviors are socially programmed, not genetic. "Women are more focused on care than men – childcare, household care, personal care," she explained.

#16

My Wife Insists This Is Normal

My Wife Insists This Is Normal

mgf1439 Report

#17

My Lunatic Wife Cuts Bananas In Half And Just Leaves The Top

My Lunatic Wife Cuts Bananas In Half And Just Leaves The Top

reddit.com Report

#18

My Girlfriend's Kitchen, Everyone

My Girlfriend's Kitchen, Everyone

billybear0108 Report

The researcher who conducted the Michigan State University campus study, Carl Borchgrevink, suggested that men washed their hands less because they believe fearing germs is emasculating. "We did talk to some of [the men] and ask, 'Why didn't [you] wash your hands?' And they would look at us indignantly and say, 'I'm clean, I don't need to wash my hands.' They had a sense of invincibility."

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#19

Check Before Buying Groceries

Check Before Buying Groceries

My wife never checks if we have something or not before going to the grocery store or, even worse, ordering online. Case in point: about 7 cream cheeses. Varieties are nice, but we'll never use them up without bagels 3 meals a day. It's not really a money thing, but I just hate wasting food.

namadio Report

#20

My Wife Doesn't Get All The Ice Out Of One Tray Before Using Another

My Wife Doesn't Get All The Ice Out Of One Tray Before Using Another

jonnybanana88 Report

#21

This Represents A Single Week Of Mugs And Glasses That My Wife Leaves In Our Bathroom. I Clean All Of These Every Week, And They Are Back The Next. Anyone Else Feel My Pain?

This Represents A Single Week Of Mugs And Glasses That My Wife Leaves In Our Bathroom. I Clean All Of These Every Week, And They Are Back The Next. Anyone Else Feel My Pain?

newmyy Report

Men and women also perceive their messy surroundings differently. In a 2012 UCLA study, mothers and fathers did video tours of their homes with researchers who observed their levels of the stress hormone cortisol. They found that the mothers felt more stressed in cluttered environments, and the fathers remained psychologically unaffected.

#22

My Wife Only Takes A Few Bites Of An Apple And "Saves The Rest For Later"

My Wife Only Takes A Few Bites Of An Apple And "Saves The Rest For Later"

MethIsntCool Report

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#23

My Girlfriend Only Eats The First Bite Of Cookies Because "It's The Best Bite"

My Girlfriend Only Eats The First Bite Of Cookies Because "It's The Best Bite"

ShallowBox Report

#24

My Wife Spits Her Seed Shells Into The Door Handle Of Our Car

My Wife Spits Her Seed Shells Into The Door Handle Of Our Car

slangin_meds Report

The mothers used words like "mess," "not fun," and "very chaotic" when describing their homes. The fathers, on the other hand, didn't mention the messy environments at all. "Fathers in their home tours would walk in the same rooms their wives had come through and often made no mention whatsoever of the messiness and were unaffected psychologically," UCLA professor of anthropology, Jeanne Arnold, said.

But that doesn't mean that men don't notice the mess. In 2019, researchers showed participants photographs of messy rooms. They found that "men and women respondents do not differ in their perceptions of how messy a room is or how urgent it is to clean it up."

#25

Wife Didn't Want Anything From The Burger King, So I Got Home, Went To The Bathroom, And Came Back To This

Wife Didn't Want Anything From The Burger King, So I Got Home, Went To The Bathroom, And Came Back To This

Punch_Your_Facehole Report

#26

How My Partner Leaves The Sugar After Making Coffee

How My Partner Leaves The Sugar After Making Coffee

cheeky-ninja30 Report

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#27

My Partner Put My Laptop In The Freezer Cause It Was Overheating

My Partner Put My Laptop In The Freezer Cause It Was Overheating

Hambino0400 Report

However, the respondents did care about to whom the messy room belonged. Upon hearing that a woman lives in the clean room, the participants judged it as less clean than when a man lived there.

They also thought that guests would judge the woman more and that she would feel uncomfortable having people over. And it was here that the main difference presented itself: we hold women to a higher standard of cleanliness than men.

#28

How My Wife Loads The Dishwasher

How My Wife Loads The Dishwasher

beastly13579 Report

#29

My Wife Never Finishes A Bottle Of Shampoo Or Body Wash Before Buying A New Kind And Leaving The Old Ones

My Wife Never Finishes A Bottle Of Shampoo Or Body Wash Before Buying A New Kind And Leaving The Old Ones

reddit.com Report

#30

The Way That My Girlfriend Eats A Pizza

The Way That My Girlfriend Eats A Pizza

alarik98 Report

It's also worth mentioning that the conclusions of the study played into the stereotype that men are lazy slobs. Respondents said that if the messy room belonged to a man, he was less responsible and hardworking. Yet participants didn't think that visitors would judge the man. "There's no expected social consequence to that," one of the researchers, Sarah Thébaud, said. "It's that 'Boys will be boys' thing."

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#31

How My Girlfriend Doesn't Zip The Resealable Bag Closed And Puts The Bag Upside Down

How My Girlfriend Doesn't Zip The Resealable Bag Closed And Puts The Bag Upside Down

hunt103 Report

#32

My Wife Leaves The Empty Candy Wrappers In The Bowl Of Candy As She Eats Them

My Wife Leaves The Empty Candy Wrappers In The Bowl Of Candy As She Eats Them

SirDeezNutzEsq Report

#33

Things My Wife Leaves In The Fridge

Things My Wife Leaves In The Fridge

SnooLobsters8922 Report

#34

This Is What My Wife Does To Muffins

This Is What My Wife Does To Muffins

kmkent51 Report

#35

This Is How My Wife Deals With Avocados

This Is How My Wife Deals With Avocados

pelito Report

#36

Wife Asked Me To Put Some Gas In Her Car Before She Drives To Work Tomorrow

Wife Asked Me To Put Some Gas In Her Car Before She Drives To Work Tomorrow

Texas12thMan Report

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#37

"It's Always So Cold In Our House. Our Furnace Sucks." -Wife In January 2020 When It's -32°C

"It's Always So Cold In Our House. Our Furnace Sucks." -Wife In January 2020 When It's -32°C

dfGobBluth Report

#38

My Girlfriend Leaves The Bath Tub Running Slightly 24/7, 365 Because Her Cat Likes To Stick His Paws In It

My Girlfriend Leaves The Bath Tub Running Slightly 24/7, 365 Because Her Cat Likes To Stick His Paws In It

reddit.com Report

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#39

My Wife Never Replaces The Roll. This Is The Closest She Will Get

My Wife Never Replaces The Roll. This Is The Closest She Will Get

kawikacosta Report

#40

I Went To The Bathroom And Came Back To Find That My Girlfriend Had Taken A Bite Out Of My Burrito

I Went To The Bathroom And Came Back To Find That My Girlfriend Had Taken A Bite Out Of My Burrito

AGreenProducer Report

#41

My Wife: "I Always Check The Lint Trap." Every Time I Check The Lint Trap, I Find It Like This

My Wife: "I Always Check The Lint Trap." Every Time I Check The Lint Trap, I Find It Like This

stlredbird Report

#42

My Wife Kept Threatening To Throw Away My Favorite Pair Of Yard Work Shorts. Today I Found Them Like This

My Wife Kept Threatening To Throw Away My Favorite Pair Of Yard Work Shorts. Today I Found Them Like This

buckeyespud Report

#43

My Wife Just Throws Her Kitchen Scraps In The Sink Instead Of The Trash Can Because "The Disposal Can Handle It." The Sink Disposal Is Not A Trash Can, Right?

My Wife Just Throws Her Kitchen Scraps In The Sink Instead Of The Trash Can Because "The Disposal Can Handle It." The Sink Disposal Is Not A Trash Can, Right?

kirby5801 Report

#44

My Wife Dropped Peanut Butter Toast On The Floor. That Was 24 Hours Ago

My Wife Dropped Peanut Butter Toast On The Floor. That Was 24 Hours Ago

Hand-Driven Report

#45

My Wife Keeps Using My iPad As Her Coaster

My Wife Keeps Using My iPad As Her Coaster

JayTheSay Report

#46

My Wife Leaves The Lights On For No Reason

My Wife Leaves The Lights On For No Reason

One_pop_each Report

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#47

My Wife And Kids Find This Perfectly Normal And Acceptable

My Wife And Kids Find This Perfectly Normal And Acceptable

Echo_Romeo571 Report

#48

The Way My Wife Changes The Toilet Paper Roll

The Way My Wife Changes The Toilet Paper Roll

FunWithAPorpoise Report

#49

The New Jar Of Nutella My Girlfriend Tried To Heat In The Microwave

The New Jar Of Nutella My Girlfriend Tried To Heat In The Microwave

aintx Report

#50

My Partner Insists That The Scrub Mommy Is A Washcloth, And This Is How She Stores It

My Partner Insists That The Scrub Mommy Is A Washcloth, And This Is How She Stores It

Price-x-Field Report

Note: this post originally had 87 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.