It’s only fair for the bride to decide what the most important day of her life will look like. But there’s one thing to pick: the dress code, venue, catering menu, and guest list, and to tell your guests what not to wear. Especially if we’re talking traditional clothing. But as we all know very well, weddings are often emotionally and physically draining events that put everyone on board to the test. So there’s never one easy answer.

The internet is now divided over this r/AITA story posted by a 17-year-old Indian teen who got invited to her cousin’s wedding. “His bride is white. My cousin and his fiancee are going to have a fusion wedding,” the author explained.

The problem started when the bride saw the author’s dress she was going to wear on her day, which was a $3500 “lehenga in pale yellow, the skirt and dupatta are pretty decked out.” The bride-to-be immediately got upset over how “flashy” the garb was and realized the author could “outshine” her. The family took sides and drama ensued, so read the story in full right below.

Bride demands her 17-year-old female guest not wear her traditional Indian garb to her wedding because it’s “too flashy”

Image credits: ChanhNguyen (not the actual photo)

Whatever your big day may be, whether traditional, fusion, super extravagant, or totally minimal, planning stress is often a huge part of it. A survey by OnePoll has shown that six in ten couples married in the last year seriously considered eloping. A recent Zola study of 500 engaged or newlywed couples showed that a whopping 71% of participants thought it was more nerve-wracking than other major life events, like finding a new job.

For some, the disagreements start as early as picking out the dress code. Others realize they’re dealing with a serious case of bridezilla: sometimes they’re nitpicking every detail and constantly changing things up, and other times it’s the lack of communication that makes planning barely survivable. No wonder couples often get into serious fights that make them reconsider whether they’re really making the right decision.

Here is the full incident the Indian teen shared on r/AITA to get advice on what to do in such a situation

Image credits: Creative_Personality

To find out what an expert has to say on this incident, Bored Panda reached out to Rhiann Janak, a professional wedding planner and CEO of Lucy Till French Weddings. “For me a bride is a normal person under extraordinary, once-in-a-lifetime circumstances. If the bride wants a certain dress code, black tie, summer chic, linen shirts, I don’t think it’s too much to ask for a dress code on the website or invitations,” Rhiann said.

She continued: “Ultimately, the guests should want to also make the dream wedding come true of the bride and the bride wants to make an exceptional guest experience by inviting them into a designed event.”

Having said that, the wedding planner said that she would advise the bride to let it go if “ if someone, due to personal or religious reasons, wishes to dress outside of the dress code, be it traditional garments or other.”

Rhiann added that “It’s a fight not worth the family politics. Everyone will always have eyes for the bride on the wedding and won’t focus on the select guests who didn’t follow the dress code.” For those wondering, this doesn’t apply to Crocs: “If somebody wants to wear Crocs to the wedding, that’s where I’d draw a MAJOR line,” she concluded.

And here is what people had to comment about the whole situation

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