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I Wasn’t Ready For Pregnancy And My Decision Changed My Life
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I Wasn’t Ready For Pregnancy And My Decision Changed My Life

My partner and I had only been together for a month and a half when I found out I was pregnant. I was in shock. I was simply not ready. I knew immediately that I wanted to terminate my pregnancy.

Do you have a story that needs to be heard? Submit it to: dear.diary@boredpanda.com

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Gintarė Kozakaitė

Gintarė Kozakaitė

Author, Community member

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Gintare is a project manager at Bored Panda. Here, she coordinates the project based on true teenagers' stories called Dear Diary. She graduated with a BA in Information And Communication and MA in New Media And Digital Culture. Before joining Bored Panda, she was creating social documentaries and working as a journalist. Her greatest inspiration is people who dare to be different. And well, she truly believes that some great stories actually start with a salad. By the way, she laughs more than she talks. True story.

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Gintarė Kozakaitė

Gintarė Kozakaitė

Author, Community member

Gintare is a project manager at Bored Panda. Here, she coordinates the project based on true teenagers' stories called Dear Diary. She graduated with a BA in Information And Communication and MA in New Media And Digital Culture. Before joining Bored Panda, she was creating social documentaries and working as a journalist. Her greatest inspiration is people who dare to be different. And well, she truly believes that some great stories actually start with a salad. By the way, she laughs more than she talks. True story.

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Freya the Wanderer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The heroine of this piece did the right thing, but was she ever wronged! It is bad enough that she had a hell of a time finding a clinic, but when the first one didn't tell he about the damn staff meeting, and the doctor at the second clinic was nasty, that makes the story even sadder. And what if she hadn't been able to find a clinic in time? What then - a knitting needle, an "accidental" fall down some stairs, a dirty back alley? All the more reason to fight anti-choice hypocrites and their villainy with every peaceful, and preferably legal, means.

Carol Emory
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm always a believer in a what a woman does with her body is her choice. I do, however, find that the father usually gets left out of the decision. While she may not want the responsibility of a child..maybe he does and is fully willing to take custody and pay everything required. While I understand 9 months of pregnancy takes it's toll on a woman's body, in this day and age of where women wish to be treated equally, a man is told that he has no choice about a child that is biologically his. It just doesn't seem fair. And if girls do not want a pregnancy, there are more means than just abstinence. You have Mirena, Norplant, pills, shots and other means of preventing pregnancy. It's not 100% fool proof..but it's pretty close to guaranteeing that you won't have to go through the horrible experience of having an abortion.

Load More Replies...
Janina Smit
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The USA are worse than I ever imagined... and my opinion wasn't that great to begin with :-/

DP von Icecream
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hold that thought & then consider that the USA has never ever had real separation between church & state.......... That makes sure your original thought is actually 10 to 50 times worse.

Load More Replies...
Tiffany Marie
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll never have kids. I'd travel to a different country to get an abortion. I have no parents to help me out they're both dead & I don't even have a job and suffer too much mentally to care for a child. Not going to pay some hospital bill & go through 9 months of pregnancy just to give it up. The whole mom scene isn't for me. Being called a murderer doesn't phase me, add it to the list of names I've already been called.. LMAO

Georgia Valentine
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel so bad for women in the states who have to go through this. To get a pill termination here you have two appointments, about 3 days apart, they check you aren't being forced and that's it. There's a sexual health clinic who can provide these pills in every large town and for surgical you are unlikely to have to travel more than a few miles from your home. If you read this I hope your horrific experience lessens in your mind one day. You did the right thing for you and I'm so sorry you had to fight for it and go through what you did.

Mae
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Where I live (Europe) you only require a doctor's appointment where they check if you're pregnant, then they'll give you the medication for the termination (if you're not too far along and will need surgical one).

Load More Replies...
Night Owl
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

BTW, the US federal government is bringing back the death penalty after 16 years https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/25/us/politics/federal-executions-death-penalty.html https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/jul/25/death-penalty-capital-punishment-us-justice-department-resumes-executions Where are the protests from those who call themselves "pro life"?

Uwe Theiss
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because the name "pro-life" is wrong, they are just "anti-womens-rights". They don't give a s**t about born people. They only want to force women to do what they want. Death penalty? That is fine, but abortion is murder! The US has far too much religious extremists who like to treat women badly.

Load More Replies...
Rachael Klein
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Congratulations on your angel baby. Maybe it's siblings will get to live.

MissDemeanour
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not everybody wants kids & not everybody should have them. Unfortunately, any idiot can breed.

JozeeMom
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it not your baby, if it not your body, if it not your life then it NOT your business. Unless someone ask you to help.

Victoria Swift
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Abortion IS NOT birth control. There are lots of other options before it gets to the point of conception.

Jesper Rasmussen
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How we do sex ed in Denmark: https://www.norden.ee/images/heaolu/info/heaolu/line_anne_roien.pdf

Full Name
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You were in shock? Unless you accidentally sat on his 'special' sock right after he got done violating it, sperm plus vagina equals possible baby.

Ben Smith
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you weren’t ready for pregnancy then you weren’t ready for sex. Unless you’re ready for the many outcomes of sex, both physical and emotional, and have a solid knowledge of birth control keep your pants on. Goes for women and men.

Sara Lang
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I respect your decision, but for heavens sake we all know how to stop a baby. Make sure you use contraception in future, and you won't have this problem. I'm British, but I used to live in California. I went through the same thing, over 20 years ago. The whole experience was trouble-free and painless, covered by insurance and no judgemental lectures from anyone. I never regretted it, and neither did my partner of the time. What has happened to America? By the way, pro-lifers, there are enough people in the world, don't judge women for their decisions. You cannot kill something that hasn't been born.

Suluhu
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was on the pill when I was suddenly pregnant. Never missed a day, just got pregnant while on the pill. Contraceptives are not always effective.

Load More Replies...
Jesper Rasmussen
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To put it bluntly you choose to be pregnant. Or - to be more modest - pregnancy is a result of choices you make. You choose to have sex together (ruling out rape etc). So pregnancy should not come as a chock. That said I think abortion should be free as it is where I live. But still abortion is no easy solution and should be seen as a last option, so I think people must be responsible and educate themselves before they have sex - there is no reason to blame anyone else if you get pregnant.

Georgia Valentine
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never want a child. No doctor wants to tie my tubes. Should I, a 30 year old woman never have sex again?

Load More Replies...
Danimal
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

i consider myself pro choice, within certain time limitations, for whatever reason, and emergency only (actual emergency) after first trimester. what annoys me is that to many people are celebrating abortion and wearing it like a badge of honor. maybe this girl felt bad bc she terminated a life she created, and would have felt bad even if the abortion was performed immediately.

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I'm switching off from borderlands it's just embarrassing how every other post is a group stupid women who should know better wearing there abortions as bravery badges and shoving them in every person's face can't people be ashamed about killing like they used to be instead of quoting so called facts

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Accidents happen why what happened did she trip and land on his d**k, whoops

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

It's something how she says that SHe was in pain SHE made the choice she she she her her her how selfish and the fact that it was a shock that she got pregnant that normally happens when your thoughtless and probably a pathetic child. Oh no I let some guy put his d**k inside me and now I'm pregnant. Get a clue

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

If people don't know what safe sex and contraception is at there age then they never will . A lot of dead angry baby's in heaven wondering why no one would put aside there selfishness and let them live I'm just glad I know how to keep my legs shut and who ever I plan to have we. With is getting no where near my temple with out contraception

Ian Bartels
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

The harder choice is not to choose to kill a baby, but to deal with the choice that we made to have sex and live with taking care of the baby. That goes for both the mother and the father. It's rediculous and upsetting that we think that the harder choice is the one that is most convenient for us.

bbc
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

You cannot decide on the lives of other people, that includes your unborn children.

Freya the Wanderer
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The heroine of this piece did the right thing, but was she ever wronged! It is bad enough that she had a hell of a time finding a clinic, but when the first one didn't tell he about the damn staff meeting, and the doctor at the second clinic was nasty, that makes the story even sadder. And what if she hadn't been able to find a clinic in time? What then - a knitting needle, an "accidental" fall down some stairs, a dirty back alley? All the more reason to fight anti-choice hypocrites and their villainy with every peaceful, and preferably legal, means.

Carol Emory
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm always a believer in a what a woman does with her body is her choice. I do, however, find that the father usually gets left out of the decision. While she may not want the responsibility of a child..maybe he does and is fully willing to take custody and pay everything required. While I understand 9 months of pregnancy takes it's toll on a woman's body, in this day and age of where women wish to be treated equally, a man is told that he has no choice about a child that is biologically his. It just doesn't seem fair. And if girls do not want a pregnancy, there are more means than just abstinence. You have Mirena, Norplant, pills, shots and other means of preventing pregnancy. It's not 100% fool proof..but it's pretty close to guaranteeing that you won't have to go through the horrible experience of having an abortion.

Load More Replies...
Janina Smit
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The USA are worse than I ever imagined... and my opinion wasn't that great to begin with :-/

DP von Icecream
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hold that thought & then consider that the USA has never ever had real separation between church & state.......... That makes sure your original thought is actually 10 to 50 times worse.

Load More Replies...
Tiffany Marie
Community Member
5 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll never have kids. I'd travel to a different country to get an abortion. I have no parents to help me out they're both dead & I don't even have a job and suffer too much mentally to care for a child. Not going to pay some hospital bill & go through 9 months of pregnancy just to give it up. The whole mom scene isn't for me. Being called a murderer doesn't phase me, add it to the list of names I've already been called.. LMAO

Georgia Valentine
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel so bad for women in the states who have to go through this. To get a pill termination here you have two appointments, about 3 days apart, they check you aren't being forced and that's it. There's a sexual health clinic who can provide these pills in every large town and for surgical you are unlikely to have to travel more than a few miles from your home. If you read this I hope your horrific experience lessens in your mind one day. You did the right thing for you and I'm so sorry you had to fight for it and go through what you did.

Mae
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Where I live (Europe) you only require a doctor's appointment where they check if you're pregnant, then they'll give you the medication for the termination (if you're not too far along and will need surgical one).

Load More Replies...
Night Owl
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

BTW, the US federal government is bringing back the death penalty after 16 years https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/25/us/politics/federal-executions-death-penalty.html https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/jul/25/death-penalty-capital-punishment-us-justice-department-resumes-executions Where are the protests from those who call themselves "pro life"?

Uwe Theiss
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because the name "pro-life" is wrong, they are just "anti-womens-rights". They don't give a s**t about born people. They only want to force women to do what they want. Death penalty? That is fine, but abortion is murder! The US has far too much religious extremists who like to treat women badly.

Load More Replies...
Rachael Klein
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Congratulations on your angel baby. Maybe it's siblings will get to live.

MissDemeanour
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not everybody wants kids & not everybody should have them. Unfortunately, any idiot can breed.

JozeeMom
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it not your baby, if it not your body, if it not your life then it NOT your business. Unless someone ask you to help.

Victoria Swift
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Abortion IS NOT birth control. There are lots of other options before it gets to the point of conception.

Jesper Rasmussen
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How we do sex ed in Denmark: https://www.norden.ee/images/heaolu/info/heaolu/line_anne_roien.pdf

Full Name
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You were in shock? Unless you accidentally sat on his 'special' sock right after he got done violating it, sperm plus vagina equals possible baby.

Ben Smith
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you weren’t ready for pregnancy then you weren’t ready for sex. Unless you’re ready for the many outcomes of sex, both physical and emotional, and have a solid knowledge of birth control keep your pants on. Goes for women and men.

Sara Lang
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I respect your decision, but for heavens sake we all know how to stop a baby. Make sure you use contraception in future, and you won't have this problem. I'm British, but I used to live in California. I went through the same thing, over 20 years ago. The whole experience was trouble-free and painless, covered by insurance and no judgemental lectures from anyone. I never regretted it, and neither did my partner of the time. What has happened to America? By the way, pro-lifers, there are enough people in the world, don't judge women for their decisions. You cannot kill something that hasn't been born.

Suluhu
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was on the pill when I was suddenly pregnant. Never missed a day, just got pregnant while on the pill. Contraceptives are not always effective.

Load More Replies...
Jesper Rasmussen
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To put it bluntly you choose to be pregnant. Or - to be more modest - pregnancy is a result of choices you make. You choose to have sex together (ruling out rape etc). So pregnancy should not come as a chock. That said I think abortion should be free as it is where I live. But still abortion is no easy solution and should be seen as a last option, so I think people must be responsible and educate themselves before they have sex - there is no reason to blame anyone else if you get pregnant.

Georgia Valentine
Community Member
5 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never want a child. No doctor wants to tie my tubes. Should I, a 30 year old woman never have sex again?

Load More Replies...
Danimal
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

i consider myself pro choice, within certain time limitations, for whatever reason, and emergency only (actual emergency) after first trimester. what annoys me is that to many people are celebrating abortion and wearing it like a badge of honor. maybe this girl felt bad bc she terminated a life she created, and would have felt bad even if the abortion was performed immediately.

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I'm switching off from borderlands it's just embarrassing how every other post is a group stupid women who should know better wearing there abortions as bravery badges and shoving them in every person's face can't people be ashamed about killing like they used to be instead of quoting so called facts

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Accidents happen why what happened did she trip and land on his d**k, whoops

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

It's something how she says that SHe was in pain SHE made the choice she she she her her her how selfish and the fact that it was a shock that she got pregnant that normally happens when your thoughtless and probably a pathetic child. Oh no I let some guy put his d**k inside me and now I'm pregnant. Get a clue

David Fox
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

If people don't know what safe sex and contraception is at there age then they never will . A lot of dead angry baby's in heaven wondering why no one would put aside there selfishness and let them live I'm just glad I know how to keep my legs shut and who ever I plan to have we. With is getting no where near my temple with out contraception

Ian Bartels
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

The harder choice is not to choose to kill a baby, but to deal with the choice that we made to have sex and live with taking care of the baby. That goes for both the mother and the father. It's rediculous and upsetting that we think that the harder choice is the one that is most convenient for us.

bbc
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

You cannot decide on the lives of other people, that includes your unborn children.

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