The coronavirus is still spreading around the world. As are all the jokes surrounding it. Humor has turned out to be essential during these difficult times. Shared laughter has been giving us strength in adversity, helping us feel a little bit more in control when the future looks so heckin' uncertain. Most importantly, the jokes and memes about the pandemic bring us together and help us to feel connected, from one isolation pod to another.
So, Bored Panda continues to collect the funniest gags about the Coronapocalypse from around the Internet so that you have at least some sense of comfort in this tiring fight against our common microscopic enemy. Continue scrolling and enjoy our list, and if you finish it wanting more, check out our earlier posts on the topic here, here, and here.
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Yep, I just start coughing. (Asthma, allergies, & recovering from bronchitis). Lol.
I do that at work. Still waiting to be sent home...
Load More Replies...Nice come back! And thank you for your service in these trying times.
And the beauty is, anyone can use this response -- it's not like they'll ever know!
I wish I could have been in that grocery line, lol!! I would have loved to have seen the look on that lady's face when the nurse told her that.
Jokes aside, there are some good coronavirus-related news stories and lately, the thing everyone's talking about is the Oxford vaccine. The BBC reported that data from early-stage human trials of a COVID-19 vaccine developed by Oxford University has positive results. It appears safe and triggers an immune response. Trials involving 1,077 patients showed the injection led to them making antibodies and T-cells that can fight the coronavirus. It is, however, still too soon to know if this is enough to offer protection and larger trials are underway.
I think you have a typo. Do you really mean winning, or do you mean whining?
Load More Replies...It means where your fingertips reach on your thighs when your arms are hanging at your sides.
We had a no uniform day at school once. A girl wore a T shirt with the letters F**K on it standing for French Connection United Kingdom. She was sent home because our headmistress said that it looked too much like the "F" word.
you realize we breathe out the toxins that our body can't process, and when you wear a mask you keep breathing in the toxins you breathe out (let's see how many downvotes this comment gets)
Ugh. I was in junior high, wearing a short skirt (I’m pretty tall so it was above my knees). I was wearing tights and everything, but I had to get water right as some idiots came out of the men’s locker room. I knelt to get water and some loser wolf whistled. I thought it was my fault so I ran into the library and hid. Two years later, I wasn’t wear short skirts, but I got the same person making rude comments. I WAS WEARING SKINNY JEANS AND A SWEATER. How is that fair?
Not having to wear a mask in a public health emergency is NOT a constitutional right!
There was no "pandemic" haha yall should stop with the stupid already
And you’re the sleazy loser who can’t get a date if he had class and tact, so you hate on women who love themselves because they’re fine with being gorgeous in a society you help implement that tries to put us down
Load More Replies...The vaccine, which is called by a name that could very well be a gamer's nickname, ChAdOx1 nCoV-19, isn't the only one that's providing us hope. The New York Times reports that researchers around the world are developing more than 160 vaccines against the coronavirus, and 26 vaccines are already undergoing human trials. Typically, vaccines require years of painstaking research and testing before reaching the public, but scientists are racing to produce a safe and effective vaccine by next year.
Until then, we'll have to make do with jokes and memes.
All the Karens are so offended. "You can't be rude to me!!! I'm only allowed to be rude to you!!"
Funny thing is - there was no rude comment as far as I can tell.
Load More Replies...has anyone found the part in the constitution that says it is their right to not wear a mask ?
That was actually a real good answer! You come here, you gotta wear a mask. If you are "medically " impedes to wear a mask, shop online!. If their major argument is that they don't wanna wear it 'cause they "can't breathe", then shop online. Nowadays you can get literally everything delivered at your doorstep.
I LOVE the internet shopping...shows up in 2 hours and I stay in budget since I'm not walking by little stupid things and buying them
So true Michelle! I never get out of there without spending a hundred bucks when I only went in to buy toilet paper.
Load More Replies...Also have no idea which constitutional right they think wearing a mask is violating. But the fruit licking is covered under the Interstate Commerce Clause which allows the government to regulate trade, including how fruit can be sold
Wussy whining cry babies. We ALL hate wearing masks but we do it because it stops unknowingly sick people from spreading germs on everything and making germs harder to avoid.
Don't generalize. I don't hate wearing a mask. At least any more than wearing pants.
Load More Replies...As an European I'm highly amused by those photo's of American men standing in shops with assault rifles on their backs like they are in the middle of some zombie-apocalypse. I, mean, seriously dude, how microscopic small is the d**k that you are trying to compensate?
I snort-laughed while reading this. Thank you, I needed that!
Load More Replies...Ex smoker of ten years, wear an N95 with work gloves in a warehouse 9 hours a day without AC in Texas summer heat doing shipping. The "Karens" of this country can handle 30 minutes in Whole Foods wearing a handkerchief.
Right, ironically, he does not seem to realize you can talk whilst holding your breath, and also underwater. Neither of those scenarios will allow you breathe...but they will allow you to talk. It is "basic science". I can literally talk and read his entire paragraph out loud while not breathing. SMH
Load More Replies...Ouch. I saw a video recently where a couple of different doctors were hooked up to pulse ox (level of oxygen in the blood) machines. Even after putting on SIX surgical type masks, their oxygen levels never decreased. Nobody LIKES wearing them (especially if you wear glasses!), but that LYING MORON in the White House has s**t for brains and his followers (cult members) think he knows more about Covid-19 than scientists and medical professionals. Seriously hope you ALL catch it.
Not a nice answer but an understandable one. Being nice doesn't always work.
"Nice is nice, but being a b***h gets results" a very sweet, ladylike old lady in my grandma's nursing home, to one of the nurses
Load More Replies...I'll just add "visit Tuscaloosa" on my bucket list. Next up: figure out where it is.
It is where Alabama football (a big deal around here. Not for me, I couldn't care less.) But in the South football is huge. Wonder if the team was there and got covid. Auburn and Florida would be happy. Not really, hopefully.
Load More Replies...If people understood the difference between inconvenience and oppression, we wouldn't be having these arguments about masks. You can't fix stupid so why try and reason with it? I like this response. Direct and to the point.
It's a shame you didn't give Lloyd a chance. Especially after he drove all the way across the country just to bring you your briefcase. You would've liked him, he's a funny guy.
Load More Replies...American Madness: Georgia Republican governor Brian Kemp issued an executive order that overrules cities and counties in Georgia that had instituted mandatory face mask requirements to stop the spread of the novel coronavirus that causes COVID-19.
This is not really from the city of Tuscaloosa. It's from a parody site of the city
Serious question though, when was the last time any political entity cared about anyone but themselves?
I like the approach. You cannot have a conversation with covidiots who do not listen.
This statement can be just as easily applied to literally every decision made at any level of government
I think an "about this mandate" would have been a good addition unless this is the general stance on all issues.
Children are monsters. I mean, look at what happens when one never grows up, and becomes POTUS?
Please do not put my children in the same basket as that disgusting evil piece of c**p.
Load More Replies...Anyone who thinks adults will social distance at bars and not have huge parties with lots of touching has never met adults.
Gotta say though, all the kids I know act more responsibly during the pandemic than many adults I see around.
When you have older kids that will listen to instructions then yeah OK but then you get young kids that finds it hard to sit, listen and understand. It must be difficult for the teachers.
They already bring every know disease from school, so right, let's add coronavirus to the list!
There's an open letter from rich people asking their government to let them pay more taxes. https://en.mercopress.com/2019/06/25/in-an-open-letter-us-super-rich-want-to-pay-higher-taxes. NOTE: "The letter pointed out that fellow billionaire Warren Buffett has said he is taxed at a lower rate than his secretary."
I doubt that letter has Steve Bezos attached to it
Load More Replies...I'm 100% fine with the idea of redistributing billionaires' money for the people. Killing them? Eh...Only if they don't surrender their fortunes when asked.
Economy is more than GDP. It's also supply chains. How many people would die from broken supply chains? From being unable to buy medicines or other necessities?
Trump is more than happy to let the virus roll thru and it hits the two income and social groups the hardest. Which are ironically the same two groups of society that he initiated cuts on first thing into office.
Its so fun watching small minds think so hard on a issues that wasnt even real, its so cute watching your liberal minds try so hard but yet fail everytime
Im sure you do, stupid loves its on reflection
Load More Replies...After stairing at your reflection long enough you can file a formal complaint ... on facebook.
Other people aren't and weren't my responsibility so their deaths weren't really for me to care about, Oh wait there wasn't any deaths all propaganda given to you by local and big government haha its funny watching you liberals try hard with your stupid.
Don't forget the KKK masks! When it's in the name of racism masks are fine
When it's in the name of racism it is necessary. 😠 Cause bullying is always done best by the cowardly
Load More Replies...I've read and heard so many people saying "carbon monoxide" instead of "carbon dioxide". They don't even know the difference nor they care about it. Just wanna complaint using this random words they've just saw on Facebook 😂
I don't hear anyone complaining that their skin-tight jeans are preventing their skin from breathing.
Oh,... i can't wear those things,... my thighs can't breathe!! bwahahaha!!!
Load More Replies...The bitter truth. If masks where harmful let’s see you been operated on by a surgeon nor wearing one and breathing into your open wound.
They don't go to hospitals but social media instead. Social media site are still the best address to treat your injured ego.
Socials are the new psycopaths refugee. Masks, dogs adoptions, trump supporters or different opinions about the convenience of getting an electrical car aren't fundamental, the important is to flush menthal disturbance with little to no help. Whenever case you explain them and they see they're wrong, they just disappear looking for another satisfactory message to complain about.
Load More Replies...Masks hurt souls. Hospitals don't fix souls. Perhaps they are rushed to churches instead?
Look another failure that failed at the covid game, Lol screaming over something fake doesn't make it really this post I'm sure this has bruised your ego little man
Its called forcing me in submission and I'm sorry i don't let my small mind control me I don't jump to the will of my government they don't have a say in my life.. But hey its good to know there is stupid in this world like yourself that does it makes my life easier.. Plus I don't give a s**t about your health or what you're going to yell and scream about.. try harder princess.
Load More Replies...I knew this was normal in the US, but it takes me by surprise every time. I would feel like I was in prison or some country with dictatorship. It's so scary.
You do know that the number of school shootings in the dictatorship of North Korea is 0 in the past 25 years?
Load More Replies...I hereby contradict your conspicuous assertation that elongated phraseology insinuates a lack of authentic intellectual reflection.
Load More Replies...So, the guy performing an 8 hour surgery is doing so oxygen deprived? Good to know
Why not wear deep sea diving suits with oxygen tanks and masks? Handy if it rains too.
I got new respect for firefighters during a course I did for work - being rigged up with mask and oxygen tank and related gear is not for sissies. Cloth masks are a walk in the park.
Load More Replies...And it's not even the particle size that matters, since the weave in most fabrics is quite a bit larger than what it's filtering. It's not a strainer, it doesn't need to catch every side of the virus to be effective, it just has to have a single fiber touch the virus.
If masks block oxygen, why are doctors and other medical professionals able to wear them for HOURS?
And masks don't even stop those 0.125-micron particles, they just stop virus-laden droplets that are 1~5 microns.
That argument only works if they are using duct tape for their mask. Otherwise, they will get plenty of oxygen while wearing a mask.
Also. For the mathematically challenged. How are your lungs being filled with just the air behind the mask? Try breathing in with plastic wrap blocking your mouth. Now that is able to actually block oxygen molecules and will provide you with the actual experience of oxygen and co2 not flowing. Please remove it within a few seconds though...
Because Jezebel is condemned in the Bible, but plagues are sanctioned, by God. Duh 🙄
Wait. Maybe it’s a plague, sent by God, as punishment for allowing our daughters to wear spaghetti-strap tank tops to school - one cannot disprove this theory.
Load More Replies...Oh my god! Don't show your shoulders because boys can't control their privates...
We can threaten their lives, but never their morality! Better to lose your life than your soul, by showing off those dirty, sensual shoulders.
This is a rule because apparently our shoulders are “distracting” like what
Or when your shirt goes up the slightest bit to show your belly when lift your arms
My view is that the American public has been conditioned (or brainwashed, it basically amounts to the same) to respond emotionally to political questions. This makes it easy to influence them in order to keep them occupied with emotionally laden issues, abortion being one example, while the ultrarich and the powerful mega-corporations quietly go about their business. Trump was/is a weirdo made-in-heaven president for them, a true master at distraction as he is.
Just reminding you that not all Americans are like that. We have a lot of intelligent people here, It's just that the worst ones are the loudest. Not trying to be aggressive or mean, but those f*****g idiots give us all a bad name.
Load More Replies...Science: "You can accept facts, change a few minor habits, and help the world!" _____ HUmanity: HELL NO!
When you manage to change each and every real issue into a political thing, you made sure that there will never be a solution to any of the problems.
If nothing else, at least they are immune to facts. It's something :D
H. L. Mencken said it best: "There's no underestimating the intelligence of the American public."
Man that is painfully true. The US has embraced stupidity at the behest of the rich and they perpetrate their stupidity on everyone else.
I want it now, Daddy. Get me power over government so I make a law against masks! Get me it now!
Load More Replies...Right? You can have a very mild case or not show symptoms for a few weeks, but still be contagious. I have asthma and early COPD - so you coughing/sneezing/breathing in my face could very well cause me TO DIE. How very f*****g patriotic of you, you entitled self centered pussy.
yep i feel ashamed it was the alligators on meth, and i knew it all along xd
Load More Replies...Doesn't New York have more people that Florida?
Load More Replies...California is now on lockdown. I'm in Texas. Our Governor might do the same. We are on a mask mandate already. I live in a small town, and.there was recently an event with hundreds of participants, most without masks.
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Load More Replies...Don't forget the fine state of Arizona. Our US rep (Andy Biggs) won the Publishers Clearing house so obviously was the best choice for congress.He says the Covid-19 is a hoax.State Senator Kelli Ward is saving us from contrails.
Come over here. We're just across the river. Take I-8, I-10, or I-40. We're still hiring. Barstow would be just like home.
Load More Replies...One thing these states have in common is that they all border an ocean or gulf. New York was hit hard as well.
I was just waiting to see this scene as a meme. Didn't realise it would be for this though
Aren't they the ones that are usually against free access to safe abortions, too? And for capital punishment? And against free high-quality education for all? How about that?
Most "Pro-lifers" really only care about the unborn. Once you're born, you're out of luck.
Load More Replies...I beg to differ: as a foreigner, I genuinely think that all lives matter AND wear a mask.
Americans recognize that all lives matter/are important. The Black Lives Matter movement isn't trying to say that ONLY black lives matter. Rather it is trying to make black lives a focus because of the way they're treated as though their lives DON'T matter. There's a great cartoon that uses an analogy of a house being on fire and the fire department focusing on putting it out. Someone else says "all houses matter," which is true, but the point is to take care of the house that's actually on fire.
Load More Replies...Or the ones who swore they only owned automatic weapons to prevent government tyranny but are silent about what's happening in Portland.
Pro-Life definition: Black Lives matter No Capital Punishment Much less guns No abortions Anti-Discrimination Pro-Free Services Honestly do any of you fit that description? I'll take a wild guess, no. That's because you shove in all the propaganda your political party gives you.
I do consider myself pro-life, but not in the same way that most people view it, and definitely not in the same way it fits in the political definition. (I wish Bored Panda would let me expound without cutting off the text box!) Absolutely, Black Lives Matter! Yes, wear a mask for goodness sake! How can we possibly get upset about the government infringing on our rights by telling us to wear masks but not protesting the killing of citizens for suspicion of... buying Skittles? Playing with a water gun? Selling untaxed cigarettes? Being claustrophobic and maybe not recognizing a counterfeit $20 (which I wouldn't either most likely)? What of the 5th Amendment - that no one shall be deprived of LIFE without due process?
Load More Replies...They’re the people who don’t realize that, while all lives mattering is of course the ultimate goal, it cannot happen while some lives—-specifically wealthy, WASP, male ones—-are still allowed to matter more than all the others.
Same for my niece, the only thing she missed were friends.
Load More Replies...But, but, but, If you don't believe in the virus, aren't people that you know immune to it??? *facepalm*
It reminds of the Sergeant Major who's advised that one of his cadet's has just lost his parents in a terrible accident and should break it to the lad gently. So all the cadets are lined up for inspection and the Sergeant Major goes "All of you who have a mum and dad step forward", without missing a beat he adds "Not so fast Corbett"
I loved learning online as a kid... it was nice and quiet for me to learn. The other kids- and some teachers- did most of the trauma for me. But of course everyone is different. Sometimes you also just have to try things and see how it goes. :) Be open to ideas!
Ok, but I'm getting my a*s kicked by calc 1 online. learning via zoom doesn't work for me and I'm pretty sure I failed my test today. I personally can't wait to be back on campus with or without extra social distancing precautions. I'm trying to get an education. And math via ODU lite isn't helping.
Try online tutoring. One on one instruction is way better and a good tutor can really help.
Load More Replies...OOF. Personally, I really enjoyed online classes. There are so many things that you don't have to do before you go to school, such as choosing what clothes to wear and so on. The side effect is that I feel less motivated to study and I'd often find myself drifting away, doing other things.
So real. I’ve tried so many that have been recommended, but none seem to work. I just have to intermittently put my glasses on my head, until I actually need them again.
Load More Replies...A trick I learned, pull the mask as high as you can on the bridge of your nose before sliding on your glasses. It may feel a little weird at first but works like a charm.
This. I will continue to wear my mask and gloves when I go out in public, and just deal with the foggy glasses. Honestly, I want to go back to normal just as much as the anti-maskers. But let me tell you this; if you continue to refuse to wear your mask and keep prolonging my torture, I will take action, call you out and shame you VERY PUBLICLY for being such an a*****e. If that makes me a busybody, so be it—-I will be a live busybody long after you’re a dead a*****e.
Just breathe normally. I literally cannot see without my glasses and everyone's been asking about them fogging up. Yes ... for about a second!
Prevent your glasses or goggles from fogging up with a little bit of household dish soap. Apply a few drops to a clean cloth, and rub it on the lenses, both inside and out. Once the soap has dried, buff it off with a cloth, and you'll be seeing clearly again, without fogging :D
Anti-fogging glass lens cleaner. Available at my optometrist. Thank God.
I tried this and it left blurry grease-like streaks. Could you give me the brand? Maybe mine isn't very good. Thank you!
Load More Replies...You people do something wrong. I use <50cent surgical masks, and this doesn't happen to me.
Not wrong. And I wear mine anyway. (If you get a good seal around the top, around your nose, it's not AS bad. Generally, if your glasses are fogging up, your breath is getting out and other people's breath is getting in unfiltered, so if you can get a better seal, it makes the whole thing work better, besides fogging your glasses less. But it's annoying anyway.)
/sarcasm = on/ We're not ignoring doctors and scientists, we're just saying that they don't know anything compared to that random strange dude on the internet that never left his cellar but knows all about 5G radiation, vaccinating mind controlling chips into our body and how masks are meant to shut us up. /sarcasm = off/
Pfff you forgot chemtrails.... Shows how much you know...😏
Load More Replies...I called ahead and asked and they said, "We only insist that you wear a mask." They didn't say a word about pants and now I'm in handcuffs on my way to jail.
And we need to send the rich white kids back to school so they can learn to bully others, so one day they can be politicians.
Yeah but it was mostly bc your mouth wasn't covered tbh
Load More Replies...love this! So its OK to rob a bank with a mask on? "your nicked sonny for robbing the bank" " but Mr officer i was wearing a mask!"
they usually dont like motorbike helmets either my bank has banned them
Hey, if you can fake 9th grade, apply to your local community college. Start now. They'll take you, and you can finish college sooner. -from a retired college professor
Load More Replies...And we all know that almost all bank robberies go wrong because they usually faint before they get to the end of "Put the money in the ..." Several scientific studies have shown that an alarming amount of bank robbers have early-onset dementia because of a repeated lack of oxygen while practicing in front of the mirror. NO! Do Not Quote Me On That!
And we all know that almost all bank robberies go wrong because they usually faint before they get to the end of "Put the money in the ..." Several scientific studies have shown that an alarming amount of bank robbers have early-onset dementia because of a repeated lack of oxygen while practicing in front of the mirror. NO! Do Not Quote Me On That! -Monika Soffronow 2020
Load More Replies...If I see my surgeon keel over me, then there is a much bigger problem and it's not his mask!
Brides faint in the aisle because the corset is too tight. Oh, but say yes to that (2-sizes-too-small) dress...
The Pandemic Team was created after the Ebola crisis. In other words, when politicians finally realized just how much modern global trade and travel contribute to diseases spreading worldwide before we even realize it. They understood how keeping an eye on rising disease spread, using reliably reported data to track them, statistics to predict potential paths of the spread, and sending trained professionals to help contain it, can help us either prevent—-or at least prepare for—-possible global outbreaks, since prevention is our best protection, especially if the disease has no cure/vaccine. You know, like COVID-19.
Just picking up a history book should have been enough to make anyone with half a brain realize we were going to have a pandemic at some point. These things hit every 100 years or so . . . some scientists have been warning us for years that we were due an outbreak.
Load More Replies...Disaster Preparedness. A POTUS should be prepared for any catastrophic events.
Yes. I had 2 emergency management courses at uni, an internship with an agency, and was certified by FEMA. Anyone of us can learn to do this. There has been pandemic plans since the 1970s, based on nuclear recovery plans since WWII. This stuff is out there, and can be updated easily. And I am a retired teacher...
Load More Replies...If I remember correctly, George W Bush in like 2006 already talked about the necessity of having a team that can handle such situations, because the question wasn't if a global pandemic will occur or not, but when it will.
Yes, you had an expert team at hand. But since that team was created under the Obama administration, Tweety the tangerine toddler fired the team and destroyed the only means of defense in case of a pandemic. But he's not responsible for over 140 000 dead Americans.
And the teams defense was what again? Did they have butterfly nets they would have caught Covid with, and sent it back to China?
Load More Replies...A pandemic is ALWAYS probable. The only question is... which disease?
Trump doesn't read. He watches the news and goes by gut instict. Paraphrasing what he said
there were horrible illnesses threatening the world before, but by following the steps laid out, they reduced/stopped the threat. Duh.
It wasn't a playbook for this pandemic. It was a playbook for any pandemic. It was intended to be proactive precaution instead of the hot reactive mess we're in now.
So if the mask mandate is still going on come Halloween time, are we gonna be seeing those freaky things? I hope so. By the way, my local Rite-Aid is starting to put out Halloween candy.
Plague doctor wear a mask that similar to modern day gas mask but they never never said " i cAn'T BreATHE.."
Yeah, I am so sure that the Plague that killed 70-200 million people had very little to do with it....
Load More Replies...Dude. Don't confuse the covidiots with facts. It doesn't work. -from a retired teacher
Our government should have put the U.S. on lockdown except for essential businesses. They should have issued a mask mandate, provide money to live on to the most needy, and made Covid testing.available to everyone. They should have paid essential workers bonuses. They are under a lot of stress especially doctors and nurses who are trying to keep people alive while putting their own lives at risk. And they are seeing patients die every day.
Our government is not responsible for keeping us fed. WE ARE! It’s no wonder everything is falling apart. Grow a pair and get it handled!
I agree on almost all of this except the more unemployment. We had 1/3rd of our workforce not come back and flat out TELL US it was because they wanted to get that extra unemployment bonus. Not because we weren't providing all the essentials to keep them safe but flat out laziness and greed. Needless to say they all got marked as do not rehire.
Where was that? Not in the U.S. Republicans use that story to block any extension of unemployment subsidies.
Load More Replies...You play, you pay. Be a grownup, own your mistakes, accept the consequences of your actions, and—-for once in your life—-learn from them.
I wonder how many of these folks took the dude of the bakers during the gay wedding cake scandals.
You shouldn't feel bad about it. There is no end to the stream of bad news from around the world, you now need to worry about what used to be simple things like buying groceries, and to top it off you are being deprived of normal healthy activities like walking to your office & occasional interaction with other humans (yes, even for an introvert this is difficult). Your body is in fight-or-flight mode and it's been there for so long that you can't even notice it any more but it's still happening. If you are eating more, sleeping more, doing less, whatever your stress response is, it's okay. Even if other people have it worse and appear to be doing better, your reaction to a bad situation is still normal and you should try not to feel guilty about it. Try to be as patient with yourself as you would be with a close friend going through a divorce / death of a family member / a global pandemic... You're living through hard times and it's okay to be affected by it.
Load More Replies...If I hadn't of been working all through lockdown, this would have been me!!! That hippo is gorge!!
LOL This is hilarious... they think it will be over by December? XD
With it mutating like it is, we don't know what to expect.
Load More Replies...True. Intellectually, I know that it is July right now, but, secretly, inside, I am not so sure if it is June, May or September. Weird year.
OH YOU THINK IT'S GOING TO BE OVER BY THEN? THAT'S ADORABLE!
Doubtful we’ll be back to normal by December even. Especially since the present administration won’t be hauled off in shackles until late January. After that, we can work on mitigation logically and scientifically, instead of using denial, wishful thinking, and magic. So, a conservative estimate would be spring 2021.
That’s not outside the realm of possibility either.
Load More Replies...My state just started allowing/requiring reusable shopping bags again (you can still get a paper bag, but they're 10 cents each). I think it's a little early since it's a low priority compared to a deadly pandemic. Hopefully I'm wrong and it won't cause a spike in cases.
If a doggy is able to sit and have the mask put all over their ears and face, then humans can do it, too.
Puppy says, “I want to star in a PSA about wearing a mask!” And we say, “Yes!” This is the updated version of “A Star Is Born” that we really wanted!
I have about 10 masks. I can coordinate some with my blouses
Load More Replies..."Covid is temporary, the drip is forever" is going into my wise sayings notebook.
Hey I have masks with matching T-shirts. Both have the same snarky saying on them :)
The whole f*****g point of wearing a mask is because it's spread not just by contact but through spit, coughing and sneezing. Also, "If your mask works, why do I need one?" is one of the most selfish, narcissistic things you could ever say! Your bastard a*s is literally saying "if you're putting up with a minor inconvenience to protect me, why should I do the same to you?" You made the b***h move. You decided you should have the right to be a bad person because you don't think you owe anything to anyone. Humanity can't afford to have such people like you act so childishly and if you don't understand why, look up the tragedy of the commons.
This comment is meant for Alpha Puck
Load More Replies...Damn glad i don't have his job but I work in a clean room where we wear a mask between 8-12 hours for half the week, our jobs are physically demanding and we seem to do just fine. Masks don't suffocate you, and though they can be uncomfortable you get used to them like a pair of glasses. Most importantly it's not about protecting you so much as it is about protecting your environment from you. Humans are disgustingly efficient at spreading disease, even if we aren't showing symptoms we spread the infection through how much we communicate and don't even get me started about how we touch everything all the time and rarely wash our hands.
*inhales* *space vaccuum crushes my body and I also freeze, but with independence and freedom*
Load More Replies...heeeeeeeeeyyyyyy! im an american and i wear a mask EVERY SINGLE TIME I GO OUT so why are there all these offensive stereotypes like this is mean to americans that wear masks and follow all the guidelines!!!
It's a well known phenomena: US Americans are confused between democracy and chaos. In a democracy you can't do what you want, it's not the way it works.
today as l looked in the mirror whilst applying my mask l realized something..it sure does hide the whiskers I've been to slack to pluck on my chin..chuckles..SEE!! they are useful..
Load More Replies...Yes did a zoom meeting and realized my menostache had come in nicely!
That's the thing that all your smarts were stored on ! Put it back cause it already shows !
How come they came back negative?! Though they infect you with the virus while doing the test, so they could pump up the cases and make it look worse! (At least, that is the favourite conspiracy theory at my country, gosh, I don't know what is worse, if the chips theory or the "covid injections" at hospitals..)
That's a surface-mount chip. It won't do anything unless it's soldered to a circuit board.
Damn - who forgot to solder that chip to the powersource & antenna?? You might want to have another big sneeze there buddy. Get it all out.
And that is why you are still around to shout your well-functioning lungs out, come next summer!
Influenza... the predecessor of Corona. Where they've been, Corona follows.
So Corona Beer's actual original name was Influenza Beer?
Load More Replies...Actually, in my city, they are still allowing restaurants to open, but mandating masks. Except when eating/drinking. What's the point of that??
If you need a cocktail that badly, you have much bigger problems.
My husband is British, and has continually considered, then put off, going for US citizenship. Used to bother me, but now I’m glad. I sponsored him to come here, now he can sponsor me to go with him to Canada if our last chance to fix this mess we’ve been dropped in is totally flushed down the toilet in November.
Does he have a single brother? Asking for a friend. Really
Load More Replies...If only i lived in one of those countries. But it's too late to escape now i guess.
Someone please make a time machine so we can get George and the bois to tell off every single one of these entitled a*s b*tches.
How that place isn't a Baron wasteland at this point is far beyond my comprehension
Nah, we just watch the news and make sure we don't miss Tweety's press meetings. They are even funnier than the Simpsons. Press-meet...f4b6a0.jpg
Presidential plan: Let's stop testing for Covid. There will be no new cases and some day it will just have been disappeared. Even my son in law says so.
Your son in law is an uneducated potato and I am sorry you daughter/son married him.
Load More Replies...The same person, to his friend who has been run over by a car and writhes in agony on the asphalt with multiple fractures in both legs: "Oh, get up and walk away, there's no need to feel sorry for yourself. You are well if you want to!" (Do think about this scenario the next time you feel tempted to tell someone with depression that all they need to do is to go out and have some fun...)
Uhm.. this is like having a baby make an argument, and then having a professor making fun of it because its dumb.
They likely failed because the teacher gave them a zero for cheating, not because they got the wrong answers.
History says at least a year, probably two. Three if we continue being as foolhardy as we already have been. Just look up the 1918 Spanish Influenza and 1969 Hong Kong Flu to see how long they stuck around, how many times they mutated and started spreading around the world again, and how they finally abated all those years later.
REAL experts ( As in people that actually have studied the subject and know what they are talking about) have come to the conclusion that it's here to stay. It will mutate and it's not ever going to be "over" or have "disappeared".
tbh, thats when i would walk in the room and say "yes, yes i am" just for the fun of it uwu
I’ve always chosen Mileena, so I guess I’m sticking with that bad b***h 👊🏼
Nah, Raiden would still be there, he's a god after all. Petty human problems are probably just entertainment for him.
It's a clan and as Michelle said... ain't nothing to f*ck with.
Load More Replies...Because Trump still doesn't fully believe in the virus, he certainly believes in protecting slave owner statues, and remember he's also "the least racist person you've ever met"
The statues are tangible to him. He can easily see them, so they exist to him, and he will pay attention (good or bad) to something he believes exists. Microscopic germs, on the other hand, are intangible to him. He can’t easily see them, so they don’t exist to him, and he ignores what he doesn’t believe exists.
Load More Replies...Whatever makes the T-rump look like less of an a*s, in his own eyes only.
Trump's stormtroopers are there to protect your security and your right to keep silent. Very much like the Chinese troops are protecting Hongkong.
Oh nice .. I think i will wore a chain mail mask in case is that damn virus carrying a sword
Sorry, his cage isn’t big enough to contain him, so his criminal germs don’t migrate and infect innocent people. How about we let anyone who doesn’t want to wear a mask move to an island, where they and all the other anti-maskers can ignore social distancing suggestions, and infect each other with wild abandon. Of course, before they get there they will have to sign waivers of medical treatment. However, they will be supplied with crystals, bleach, and Lysol—-probably unnecessary because, you know, herd immunity. Once the last one dies, we can disinfect the whole place then block it off until tests show it’s safe to go back.
Yes. But there really are people wearing ridiculous masks.
Load More Replies...One of the last pictures of Billy-Bob before he got his ventilator.
On the bright side this looks painful, so at least he is sort of punishing himself for his own stupidity
at the end, the main actor will fistfight the virus in an epic final battle and they will end the movie with a dance
Easy to say, when you wrote the script yourself...
Load More Replies...this soap opera is so popular they just kept filming with masks instead of pausing filming
Load More Replies...I can't stand them but Photograph is still my favorite way to sing Benedict Cumberbatch's name.
This sound like Jurassic Park after some carnivorous dinosaurs have escaped.
Considering the alternatives, not being able to dunk our butts in a pool for one summer is a small price to pay for survival. Once we’ve finally got COVID-19 beat, we can do as many celebratory cannonballs as we want. Until then, just quit being a spoiled brat, quit your whining, grow up, grow a pair, grit your teeth, and keep (properly!) pushing through this, like the rest of us are doing. You are not special.
This is exactly what our HOA did. And there was almost a civic battle over it. 😡😱😷🤒💀
perhaps the American's could vote for a president who ensures health care for all...
That's radical-left demmy-crat socialist talk! What about my FREEDUM?!
Load More Replies...You can thank Trump for that. Caving to insurance companies and dropping insurance from poor and sick. Because it a rich mans world, and only they should live.in their minds it's rich healthy living wonderfully and poor sick dead and invisible. Sadly 97% are to be the dead and invisible and that means you average folks too. For many 1% high wealth folks if your not in their club you one of the poor 97% to die.
Because we've been lucky enough to be healthy and/or wealthy. The rest of us are already dead.
Load More Replies...But at least, thanks to Obamacare, people who lose their health insurance due to job loss can enroll in an Obamacare plan.
You must be doing it tough in America man Donald Trump is an Idiot
This helps to reduce the overall costs of the healthcare system. Sick people wont go see a doctor because they cannot afford it.
This helps to INCREASE the profitability of the healthcare system. And the insurance companies.
Load More Replies...I still would rather trust a rough estimation by a doctor more than the wishful thinking of a politician.
I’d just Stay The F**k Home™ until the rona is gone. Screaming is part of the fun.
Stay The F**k Home™ is perfect for all your physical and mental health needs.
Load More Replies...Just screaming? No mention of riders with weak or overly full stomachs (who have no business being on the ride in the first place) puking all over the place?
The land of the free? With a dictator ruling by decree? It would be soooo funny if it was not so scary.
I don't see how it would be funny, but okay.
Load More Replies...Sorry, no. Trump's signature move is to put out lies about things he's actually doing himself.
Load More Replies...I have relatives that survived actual strongmen-dictators and came tothe USA. They now wish they hadn't. Nuff said.
I think no offence but Donald Trump is racist because he is always hating on China
Donald Trump is a racist. Period. And no one is offended because everyone knows he's racist except he. But there's a hell of a lot more that he doesn't know.
Load More Replies...Wrong but proper good at same time. I'd love to wear that! Be right funny walking round tarn and past all crack heads just watching their confused faces
Load More Replies...Why is this petty? Petty would be not buying her a gift surely? I wouldn't bother next year, they seem ungrateful..
The fact that you don't realize that throwing a gift at someone out of a moving car without slowing or saying hi worries me.
Load More Replies...OK, Karen, then let me ask you this: If the brakes on your car work, why would you care if mine don’t? Your brakes work, right?
*sarcasm* That's when there is only one party, right?
Load More Replies...Because you cough and sneeze into your stupid hands and then you have to friggin' touch everything douche b***h, that's why!
My hubby lost two inches off his. So stir-crazy he's done triple the time on the exercise machine in our basement. (Even dusted it off!)
Load More Replies...His hair is shiny and looking great. Must be that all in one shampoo for hair, face, body, motorbike and car.
I know right! Everyone else is saying all Americans are dumb because of a small part of us.
Load More Replies...Look, I don't know about you all, but I'm keeping my masks after all this is over. You can mouth bad words at people, you don't have to smile, it's easier to fake like you're paying attention to people ...
I really enjoy wearing the mask despite the fact it gets really hot because I live in a tropical country but it's nice to go outside and no one recognizes you, it's a blessing, less talking
And, quoting my mom, "If you look like terrible, your co workers won't recognize you!"
Load More Replies...Would be better if it was believable. I mean, Karens? In a library? Where books and knowledge are stored? Knowing where the fiction section is? Or what it is? Acting like they can read and comprehend? Bah! Preposterous!
The Kens & Karens that I meet do something like this: saying that certain books are immoral and they need to be burned. Fact: many public libraries have banned books displays year-round. As a reference librarian, I curate the display. Sometimes I'll wear my collar at work to challenge their thinking. -Rev Dr M, retired professor, 9 years as a librarian
Load More Replies...Do libraries actually have books on COVID-19? Typically it takes months (if not years) for a book to get published.
In our public library, we print out the county and state manuals on it, the local declarations posted on the walls, and have the links for all governmental information on the website's homepage. Anyway, as the reference librarian, I'll be sure busy in a few months, when the published forms of materials (books, etc) come in and we have to have them ready for reading.
Load More Replies...Don't be silly. They would put all the books from the fact section into the fiction and vice versa
*"Stealing books about Covid-19 to burn them" There, I fixed it for you.
Who cares about an anime background? We're in the middle of a pandemic.
Don’t f*****g use a pandemic as an opportunity to price gouge. It will not end well for you. We have other choices. Using my own car: price of a gallon (or less) of gas. Walking: price of time and exertion, but no money.
I don't understand how Americans claim to be for free market, and yet have such hatred of "price gouging." It's one and the same.
Load More Replies...All these people with gaps. If you insist on wearing a mask, wear it right.
Most dont fit perfectly. Ive done my best to find different styles that work, but there is always some kind of gap.
Load More Replies...If I'm not mistaken, one of these two is going to be killed by a predator pretty soon.
I went to India. Heard that had a deli and a new deli...where's my roast beef sandwich?
I am from Slovakia. We were first to wear masks in march. We have best covid rates per capita in Europe. Reopened again, just still wearing masks. Follow the rules. It works. It's that easy.
sadly Bashicka, even "easy" will be "too hard" for the lazy / stupid.... :(
Load More Replies...My country has 0 cases for almost 2 months now, although the last patient sadly passed away. She recovered from COVID19, but the aftereffect of the illness put her into a coma, which eventually caused her to pass away. :( Even though we don't have COVID19 cases anymore here, I wish that people would still be aware of the virus and not pretend that it is already fully eradicated (because IT'S NOT) but people keep on having mass gatherings and not adhering to social distancing rules. :/
My locql liquor store/bottle redemption has empty spots on the shelves and the bottle redemption has to shut down every couple days to play ctch up
Not sure yet but these are either sadly hilarious or hilariously sad.
Hey, does anyone remember the excellent memes at the start of the pandemic? Those were funny. These things are mostly just sad. A whole lot of really dull stuff about masks.
Why don't you create something great since you're so great?
Load More Replies...These are quite possibly the least funny "jokes" yet. I'm all for dark, dry or even a bit of gallows humor, but this is all just... unfunny.
"dark initiation ritual"? Wow, you all have really, truly gone off the deep end. Whose "ritual" are masks a part of? What sources are you using?
Load More Replies...I am from Slovakia. We were first to wear masks in march. We have best covid rates per capita in Europe. Reopened again, just still wearing masks. Follow the rules. It works. It's that easy.
sadly Bashicka, even "easy" will be "too hard" for the lazy / stupid.... :(
Load More Replies...My country has 0 cases for almost 2 months now, although the last patient sadly passed away. She recovered from COVID19, but the aftereffect of the illness put her into a coma, which eventually caused her to pass away. :( Even though we don't have COVID19 cases anymore here, I wish that people would still be aware of the virus and not pretend that it is already fully eradicated (because IT'S NOT) but people keep on having mass gatherings and not adhering to social distancing rules. :/
My locql liquor store/bottle redemption has empty spots on the shelves and the bottle redemption has to shut down every couple days to play ctch up
Not sure yet but these are either sadly hilarious or hilariously sad.
Hey, does anyone remember the excellent memes at the start of the pandemic? Those were funny. These things are mostly just sad. A whole lot of really dull stuff about masks.
Why don't you create something great since you're so great?
Load More Replies...These are quite possibly the least funny "jokes" yet. I'm all for dark, dry or even a bit of gallows humor, but this is all just... unfunny.
"dark initiation ritual"? Wow, you all have really, truly gone off the deep end. Whose "ritual" are masks a part of? What sources are you using?
Load More Replies...
