When Did You Realize You Weren't Cisgender?

#1

Gosh i don't even remember it very well now, maybe during covid- no clue how it started but i went through a LOT of different potential lables before finding pangender lol

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#2

well, even as a kid, I had a feeling that I wasn't who people said I was. after learning about the term transgender, I thought to myself "wait, is THAT what it is?" but I continued to believe that I wasn't trans, and for a horrible reason. at the time, I had thought that transgender was wrong because of how I was raised. at the time, I always agreed with what my family told me because I didn't want them to be mad at me and yell and hit me(don't worry, they don't do that, it was a trauma thing) and for awhile, I thought that being transgender was wrong, because my mom had told me that trans people thought that God had made a mistake with their gender, and it was wrong because God doesn't make mistakes and that gay people go to h-e-double hockey sticks. but in 2022, after watching jaiden animations video "being not straight", I began to look more into LGBT, and found out I was demiromantic and demisexual. but it wasn't until about February 2023, that I started using the pronouns she/he/they/it, and I felt a bit more comfortable, but part of me wanted to get rid of the she pronouns, and in July 2023, I asked my friend to stop calling me by the she pronouns, and it was then that I realized that I was not a girl. at the time I had already heard about the term demiboy, but didn't really know what it was. after looking more into it, I went ".....that's me..". and so now, I'm demiboy, demiromantic, demisexual, frayplatonic, and gay and use mostly he/him pronouns, but also use they/them and it/its, and I regret that I cant go back in time and help younger me out, because I still feel bad that I used to think that LGBT is wrong, and to this day, I still sometimes catch myself being like "what if this is all wrong? what if I don't go to heaven?" but I remember that I'm happy like this, that I'm happy being who I am, and its not wrong, and I'm happier then i've ever been(which is not very happy based on how life's going at the moment, but the bar was set low so oh well). and sorry for the ramble lol. also hi sam 👋

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