Like the time your mom said that eating a pickle before bed would give you nightmares!

#1

the food is ready. like mother- the food is in the oven what do u freaking mean its ready

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#2

That we couldn't get a dog because I was allergic. We couldn't get a cat because eldest sister was allergic. We couldn't get a rabbit because 2nd sister was allergic. We couldn't get a hamster because little sister was allergic. We couldn't get a snake because mum was allergic and we couldn't get a goldfish because dad was allergic.
After I moved out mum confessed that she lied because they didn't want pets and 4 kids to raise, so... fair enough I suppose, but you could have just said that.

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#3

Tapioca Fred. Whenever you left your shoes outside tapioca Fred would leave tapioca in your shoes

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#4

my mom told that if i don't brush my teeth for one night the tooth fairy is gonna take all mt teeth -_-

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#5

Furries are bad, they can be inappropriate. ( totes does not have a fursuit colection with my parents just shaking their heads )

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Harlow
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ayyyyyyyyy furries rule!!!! How many suits do you have? (I have none :[)

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#6

My mom once told me that grape juice is made by squeezing grapes in between your toes and ruined grape juice for me for, like, 5 years.

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#8

That santa is real🤭🌺 sorry kids

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Assassin Seven
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He is real. he's the thing that make our parents stressed out about Christmas. they know that if we don't receive presents, we'll cry our asses off until January!

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#9

I was standing on a grave and I didn’t know it then my mob said the soul was gonna come for me tonight and bite my toenails (I was 5)

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Commander Rex
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a weird ghost... who bites children’s toenails as punishment?

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#10

I'm going to Chicago tonight for an emergancy work meeting. First of all, my parents never said that their companies in chicago, second, my uncle lives in chicago and all of a sudden the one week he's not their they leave?
Turns out my grandpa had a stroke and they went to Chicago since they have great hospitals.

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