I know I have plenty of stories that I want to share all the time, but never have a reason, so I’m asking you what’s yours?

 

 

#1

So, at the place I do taekwondo, the music is a strange mix of K-pop, workout remixes of songs, songs with dance instructions, Imagine Dragons, and electronic music. Eventually, the inevitable happened, and that one song (the one that's like watch me whip, watch me nae nae) started playing halfway through a sparring drill.

Half the teenagers started singing along and dancing, while the other half broke down laughing. The instructor was so confused, especially when the song got to the part with the less clear instructions.

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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

More taekwondo stories: My friend got asked if she was gay by a five year old. A different friend got chucked across the room by the headmaster during a sparring match. I flew for around five seconds because a newbie kicked me WAY too hard. The headmaster's kid (she's five) started imitating him during a class behind his back.

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#2

Here we go!

So, last summer, I was feeding crows parts of my sandwich and also peanuts (I keep unsalted/unroasted peanuts in my pockets for crows) and there were like 20 of these full-grown, slightly grumpy crows who were holding a tenuous truce, a few occasionally colliding in a race for a peanut or a bit of bread. They're from a couple different flocks and arent particularly fond of eachother, but they like me and also like food, so theyre sticking around. It's been around thirty minutes of this when I glance up to a nearby holly tree and see a little tiny flash of bright blue- it's a stellar's jay, and a scrawny little juvenile, definitely no more than a year or two old. It's eyeing these twenty-some crows that are already on edge and are all like twice the little man's size and then, as I watch, it leaps off of it's perch and dives towards this crow that's pecking at a peanut. I wince as it collides with the crow- this guy's tiny and crows 1) are huge in comparison 2) hate the stellars jays in my area with a passion (they fight over my family's supply of peanuts) and 3) are already unhappy and tense. So, in a split second, the scrawny little jay is being mobbed by like 10 of the crows, the others too stubborn to abandon their food. The jay jumps away and flies off and half of the group follows it into the sky, then I lose sight of them and continue feeding the ~ 15 crows left. A few minutes later, I hear very angry cawing emerging from my right, and I glance up to see those few crows still after that little jay, who's somehow managed to stay in front of them. As they pass over the place where I'm feeding the other crows, some of them peel off and give up the chase, soon followed by the others. The jay flies off completely unharmed, which is crazy. Usually, when you are a tiny jay messing with a bunch of crows' food, you dont end up alright. What's more, I'm pretty sure I saw a flash of something in the jay's mouth, which means that not only did the little guy go up against multiple flocks of pissed off crows, get out of a fight unscathed (as a tiny scrawny juvenile no less!), and outrun the more perserverent ones, but he also came out of that successful. That little m**********r took on nearly a dozen grumpy city crows as a half-grown, scrawny little jay and he f*****g won. He got the damn peanut. This s**t could be a Disney short.

I've already told this story before here but it deserves to be told again. That little guy cheated death and got out with a peanut.

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#3

I posted something that was not nice in an attempt to be funny, fortunately, the BP community set me straight so thank you all for being so awesome!

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#4

So at my school I had two girl classmates ( in grade 7) who were close friends and were part of the same group. Let's call them #girl 1 and #girl 2. #girl 1 was really famous in school because she was good in almost everything while #girl 2 was The Singer of our school. And then there was a boy who was one grade below us. He was in short a complete disaster. Like every single time before any exams were coming up, he would end up with an injury. Like fracture in hand, broken leg, cracked skull...
So this boy liked #girl 1. And #girl 2 liked this boy. Throughout the year we would see the boy giving gifts to #girl 1 and getting gifts from#girl 1 and #girl 2 both. And the best part, the three knew all about it along with half of the school. Then our annual function came up and (I don't have the full scope here) one of my close friends and classmate saw #girl 1 and the boy coming out of the washroom. I have no idea how they invaded the CCTV cameras. Next day #girl 1 and the boy exchanged their school uniform tracksuits as they had unknowingly exchanged it on the annual day. #girl 2 cuts her hands( minor scratches, nothing to worry about.).for the boy. The boy forcibly scratches #girl 1 hand.
1 week later, me and my close friends find a show piece in the corner of our classroom. Turns out it's the same show piece #girl 1 gifted the boy. The boy stayed in the school hostel and the gift had been found by our principal. All three student's parents get called. #girl 1 parents pull her out of school. #girl 2 leaves school herself. And the boy is sent to another hostel in an entirely different state.
I want to add that the place I come from is really rural. Having a boyfriend is too big of a deal here. Youngsters who date are considered unruly and irresponsible. So it was really big deal in my school.

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#5

I have been waiting for this
Ahem

When i was like 7 i was in that phase where puddles were amazing and jumping in them is awesome.
This particular morning, i had just spent the night at my aunts house and was about to hop in her car and head home...
Well, it had just rained the day before, and right infront of me i saw the biggest, shiniest puddle ever. It was beautiful. I didnt care that i was barefoot and in pjs i took a big leap, hit the puddle and sunk.
Ya all the way up go my shoulderz.

Turns out right under their carport was a pothole, and that pothole was filled to the brink with water... just enough to look like a pefect puddle.


Ya so that ended my puddle phaze lol

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#6

Sophomore year in high school, it was the day before the final, and I had just turned in my work and gotten my grade up to an A, which was enough to skip the final. So I pulled a deck of cards out of my backpack and started playing solitaire. I played a solid 5 rounds, shuffling in between rounds, and my teacher didn't even notice, even though I sat in the front row!

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#7

Years ago I worked as a home carer and received no proper training beforehand, I had to learn on the job.
For my first ever call I was paired up with another carer. The patient was a robust and grumpy old man, very intimidating for a newbie.
He was in bed upon our arrival with a catheter bag on the floor. I was told to empty the catheter bag. Now, I'd never seen a catheter before and had no idea how it worked. My first thought was to pick up the bag of urine and take it to the bathroom...as I pulled the bag the old man began cursing in pain and when I realised why I was mortified.
After being taught how to empty his catheter bag correctly we then hoisted him out of bed and on to the commode so he could have a BM.
I was told to remove the bucket from under the commode once he was done and give him a wipe etc. I asked if he had finished, he said yes, so I removed the bucket and just as I went to wipe he had a very loose BM all over my arm. Then he turned and grinned at me saying "that's for pulling on my catheter".

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#8

My mother lived in Cyprys with her parents and sister (her other sister wasn’t born yet) for 3 years

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