“Only a honor citizen believes lies they have written about themselves.” - Here Lies, An Autobiography (saw it wrongly quoted in a book).

#1

I could care less. It's "I COULDN'T care less."

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#2

Should of
Would of
Could of

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#3

Music does NOT have charms to soothe the savage beast! it's breast! Savage breast!

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#4

"The proof is in the pudding" - a misquote of "The proof of the pudding is in the eating."

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#5

My favourite is that one that was attributed to Maggie Thatcher & used as an inspirational quote "You have to be lucky all the time. We only have to be lucky once"
When it was really what the IRA said to Maggie after the Brighton bombing

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#6

"I could care less."

Every time I hear people, intelligent people, respectable people, normal people, un-intelligent people, anybody really, say this phrase it makes my blood pressure spike. Oh, you could care less? You COULD, so.... it's possible for you to care less than you do? You could? That means you actually do care! ::Sigh::

You numskulls, the phrase is that you "COULDN'T care less", COULDN'T. COULD NOT. Meaning you're as low as it goes, it's not possible to go lower on the scale of caring. Gaaaah! Heart palpitations, I need an aspirin.

And yes, I predict that the most liked comment to my post will be something like: "I could care less how anyone says it." And no one will really know what they mean...

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#7

The title of thileaders!

I honestly thought it said "what's the worst mosquito you've ever heard?" Which only makes sense to me and my family, as we literally just fought off a swarm of golf ball sized blood suckers at our kids baseball game the other night. It was an epic showdown. I'm pretty sure I saw them fly off with one of our smallest players. I'll kknow if we all made it out alive at the next game tomorrow.

God save the little leaguers!

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#8

Chomping at the bit... It's CHAMPING at the bit! People got it so wrong, the dictionaries gave up.

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#9

For Brooklyn 99 fans: One of the worst/best misquotes of all time, "Yippie kayak other buckets." (Boyle misquoting John McClane in Die Hard)

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#10

Not mine, but people thinking it was money is power, France is bacon (it's Francis bacon)

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#11

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." was not what Gandhi said

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#12

"mods aren't our moms" (context I used to be a moderator for a minecraft server back in the day)

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#13

The sixteenth chapel

I’m gonna let that one sink in for a moment

He thought it was the sixteenth chapel Michelangelo had painted

He went on to brag about this to several people because he was such an informed expert

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#14

I never bother about that.
Those who mattered don’t mind and those
Who mind don’t matter
-not dr Seuss

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#15

A friend of mine and his family use the word “teetotaling” to mean like “all in, all the way, to the point of overuse”. It actually means “barely dabbling.”

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#16

Laura Norder. (Law and order).

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#17

If you think ( so and so), then you’ve got another thing coming. It’s think not thing, because your first thought was wrong. 🤔

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#18

When the officer said to the magistrate that I had called [the officer] 'A stupid C**T'.

When what I had actually said was, he was 'Acting like a stupid C**T'.

Subtle difference in words, huge difference in UK law.

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#19

You can never trust what's on the internet...Abraham Lincoln

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#20

My friend always says, “Take it for granite,” instead of “take it for granted,” but hers makes a lot of sense.

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#21

Darth Vader to Luke in fact says: "No, I am your father!" NOT "Luke, I am your father"

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#22

That question is mute

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#23

Tow the line.

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#24

In meetings, a former manager used to tell us he didn't "want to pour salt in the womb." No, he wasn't trying to be funny (nor would it be). He had a few other misquotes of a similar nature, but this seemed to be everyone's favorite.

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#25

"The customer is always right" and "blood is thicker than water", mainly.

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#26

"First let's kill all the lawyers" is not meant to say that lawyers are bad. It's the villain, D**k the Butcher in Shakespeare's Henry IV who says that and he wants to get rid of lawyers so he can get away with his crimes. And the correct quote is “The first thing we do is, let’s kill all the lawyers.”

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