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Hey Pandas, What Was The Last Straw That Caused You To Block Someone?
Most people have stories of how or why or when they blocked someone. It could be an annoying ex that just doesn't seem to get the message, or some internet troll who thinks the world revolves around them. Why did you save yourself?
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#1
One of my students committed suicide in May 2020 because his treatment was abruptly halted because of Covid and he couldn't cope on his own. An old Karen commented that it was this young guy's fault anyway because Covid was exclusively caused by young people partying, so nobody should feel sorry for him. I didn't just block her, I reported her.
Final score:
70points
Leo Domitrix 1 year ago
Good for you. I'd have tracked her down and mad eher clean a Covid ward full of elderly people (many who had refused to wear masks, b/c Donald said ti was just a cold).
#2
If a guy sends me a dxck pic, I will block and report him immediately.
Final score:
49points
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
Good on you! Wtf is it with guys on dating apps or even just texting starting straight-up with a d!ckpic? Like not even a hi, just immediately here is my p***s. Sheesh.
#3
I actually have two:
1) I suspected a friend of mine had a problem with gay people when she was telling me a story about a friend of hers, in particular, a daughter of the friend "who decided she was gay."
I brushed it off until a few weeks later when she posted a piece saying "There is only one God, two genders and marriage is only between a man and a woman." Yep. Blocking now. I also suspected she was secretly racist...but hadn't confirmed that yet.
2) We had a huge hurricane a few years ago. Wiped out or flooded most of the major roads leading into town. I spent one night helping this friend navigate the roads to get back home. She was texting me from 8pm to about 4am until she got home.
The next day she gets on Fb and complains that the local Planet Fitness was closed and that she thought the staff were lazy for not showing up so she could do her workout. I reminded her of how much difficulty she had getting home and that others were probably having the same issue. I also reminded her that some businesses were closed because of hurricane damage.
This is the same girl that would get on Fb and ask if anyone wanted to go to the beach or out to dinner with no notice. Then she'd get hostile if no one replied. She was also angry that her teenage daughter left to live with her father and then tells me in the same rant that she would go out to bars and pick up random guys to have sex with while her daughter was trying to sleep in the next room.
The Planet Fitness rant was the last straw. I told her she was selfish and self centered before blocking her.
Final score:
37points
John Orosz 1 year ago
People in search of lives... intelligence and all related matters of the consciousness. Do you help the poor or volunteer?
#4
I blocked someone because he took it personally that I don't celebrate christmas. It began as him asking what I wanted for Christmas and complaining that he only got an e-giftcard from his gf. I explained that I do not celebrate it and that I would prefer not to get a gift (and also that any gift means someone has thought about you at least a little, maybe it was all she could do-- as she was abroad for Christmas). He insisted I tell him what I wanted, I kept saying I really didn't want anything and hoped he could respect that. He said I was a brainwashed cult member.
... it isn't a religious thing, I just grew up not celebrating and as an adult Ireally don't get the point of mandatory gift giving (if I really feel like being high and mighty the point of Christmas, as I understand it, apart from the Baby JC is the spirit of giving not receiving so I usually take shifts from people who want to be with their families to celebrate it or I volunteer-- I do that all year but moreso in winter when people tend to struggle the most.) I give gifts throughout the year when I see something I think someone would like not because I'm obligated to. If that sounds self-righteous, fair but I'm my defense i didn't say anything like that to him until after he was literally seething over how I refuse to celebrate it.
I explained it was my right to not celebrate Christmas, many people in the world don't and I don't need a teligious excuse not to... I simply don't. I also told him tgat it should make no difference to him either way. I explained that it wasn't a religious mandate as I am agnostic and all my friends celebrate. I just personally am not interested in the commercial side of a religious holiday I don't even celebrate. I didn't want anything. It was fine that he did, I had no issue with it so didn't know why he took such issue to me not wanting something.
He called me an AH and a b***h, told me he couldn't be friends with someone as brainwashed as me so after 20minutes of nonstop insults I blocked him.
Final score:
33points
GLO SAINT-AIME 1 year ago
I had the same thing happen to me... i don't see the big deal about that holiday and i give what i see people need not because i have too and also in broke and people are picky... i rather sleep all day tell NYE......
#5
Had a friend who said that their mental health was your responsibility. My pet died and they asked me to grieve by myself as it was triggering for them. No sorry, no condolences. Blocked immediately
Final score:
32points
simply.Taz 1 year ago
No sympathy or condolences for your heartbreaking loss??? I say good riddance!!! BTW, I am truly sorry for your loss! :(
#6
When I was having a perfectly fine day, until they texted me out of nowhere asking me to call them. No clue as to what they wanted to talk about, could have been nothing at all, could have been they wanted to scream at someone and decided it was my turn. Just seeing their name on my phone made my stomach tie up in knots. I fretted over not wanting to call, but knowing the longer I waited the more upset they'd be, and trying to figure out what they might want in advance so I could be prepared to defend myself, etc. After about an hour, I suddenly realized, there was no reason to let anyone make me this miserable, even if they were family. I blocked them everywhere and haven't regretted it for a moment, even years later.
Final score:
29points
#7
A guy from my programme and I would chat frequently. He was nice enough and we were study buddies And lab partners.
One evening he just went on a rant, out of nowhere, about how women have no place in STEM. That women are generally stupid and inferior and should stick to art and cooking. Being that I am a woman in STEM I got pretty offended but thought maybe his phone was stolen or what. (He did assure me that I'm "technically fine" but I do ride his coattails and without him I'd be "pretty middling"). The next day I talked to him being like "WTF" and he said that he was sorry, he had been drinking and he said some things he maybe shouldn't have said. I am a big believer that the way people act when they drink is the most honest indicator of their true feelings.
I blocked him real fast.
He failed our final laboratory individual assessment. I got the third highest mark (96) and had a perfect technique mark.
Final score:
29points
#8
My oldest friend and flatmate contracted covid right at the very beginning before vaccinations were available. They were fit, healthy with no underlying health conditions yet, it destroyed them. Multiple strokes, organ failure and now a diagnosis of aggressive, progressive ms and early onset dementia. They've just turned 53 and can't even recognise their own kids - or me. Anyway, a friend - who was fully aware of the situation, told me that it couldn't possibly be covid since it wasn't real and that I was just exaggerating ... I immediately blocked her.
Final score:
29points
simply.Taz 1 year ago
OMG!! This is so heartbreaking, regarding your friends. The other person doesn't deserve to breathe the same air as them! ;( I pray your friends conditions do not worsen. It's so hard to find the right words to express the overwhelming sadness this horrific virus has wrought upon our world. Bless you all!! :(
#9
I posted that I had gone to a comedy performance of someone famous that I remembered from college (which would be about 35 years ago) and found that he had changed ALOT! His act was very political and completely opposite to what I knew of him from before, so I was very uncomfortable. A friend speculated that he also potentially suffered a life-threatening condition, which might have altered his perspective on things. My brother-in-law misread what she wrote as wishing the guy dead, and proceeded to rip her and all liberals apart on MY page, saying it was like a liberal to wish him dead and that attitude was the cause of the Palestinian conflict. She politely disagreed with his interpretation of her comment, and he continued to rant. A little while later he texted me apologizing for his comments on my page, and I told him that he owed HER an apologize as well because she didn't say what he accused her of, and that oh by the way I was one of those liberals as well. He declined to apologize to her, so I unfriended him and we have not spoken except for short pleasantries at family weddings since that time. Don't regret it one bit.
Final score:
28points
#11
I had a best friend for about seven years. We had the same hobbies, similar music taste, she liked stories I was writing. Then suddenly, shortly after we became adults, she started to act... weird.
She became condescending, acted like she's too good for things she adored not so long ago, started consuming weird pseudo-intellectual media and adopted philosophy of Jordan Peterson. Later, it became apparen she fell down some alt-right rabbit hole.
The last straw was when she just casually mentioned she supports conversion therapy ( = pseudo-scientific attempts to "cure" LGBT+ people often through phyiscal torture). At that moment, I knew that this indoctrinated, condescending person is no longer the girl I used to know.
I can tolerate some ideological disagreements. But the alt-right ideology and open homophobia is where I draw the line.
Final score:
26points
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
Conversion therapy is scientifically proven, many, MANY times, to dramatically increase risk of substance abuse, self harm, and su!cide for the people that undergo it.
#12
When he told me he loved me so so much, but then told me I was really pretty, and I shouldn't hide it so much. (I like leggings and skater dresses with goth boots) He said if I could update my style, people would see how pretty I am. Then during a discussion, he told me I was lucky he even talked to me. Lol. I told him I'll solve that problem, and ghosted and blocked immediately. In a much happier relationship now, with someone who encourages me to be me!!
Final score:
26points
#13
having a really good date with a girl my friend set me up with. at the end, she turns to me and goes "are you transgender? i hate those fvckers." anyway i am indeed trans (FTM)
Final score:
25points
#14
When they keep using the same excuses to their own problem, while blaming it on me
Final score:
23points
#15
I blocked my father 8 years ago. My relationship with him was always difficult. He always expected everyone else to behave a certain way. Nothing I did was ever good enough for him and he never saw me as the person I am but rather the person I should be in his opinion but wasn't. He didn't like the way I dressed. He didn't think my profession was an actual job that earned money. The first thing he would do whenever we met was criticize something about me. I always laughed it off because I didn't want to fight with him. But when my grandparents died, he even criticized the way I dealt with the situation. That led to me having less contact with him. And of course, he would complain about me not calling him too. No matter if I did call him or not.
One day I just didn't answer the phone when he called. I had enough on my plate already and didn't need his negativity. I wasn't even thinking about ending things, I just didn't want to deal with him at that moment. After the second missed call, he called my work and had my CEO on the phone. That was the point where I finally snapped. Involving my boss, calling my workplace when he couldn't reach me was too much. That could have potentially hurt my career. I called him that night and finally told him all the things he did to me that hurt me and made me angry and that I would no longer allow him to do to me. He hung up on me after 5 minutes with the words "You're a lunatic. Call me when you're right in the head again."
I did exactly that and never called him again because I'll never be "right in the head again" from his point of view ever again. And if you think, those aren't good enough reasons to cut my own father out of my life: I merely scratched the surface and didn't tell what kind of psychopathic, choleric stalker he actually is.
Final score:
21points
SheamusFanFrom1987 1 year ago (edited)
That's not a father, he's nothing more than a whining sh*tsack excuse of a sperm donor. You would have been the pride of his life if his sorry, whinny a** ever got around to stop complaining and see that. Good riddance to him and may he eventually perish alone, miserable and with nothing but regret filling up his final thoughts.
#16
I had an older straight guy friend (I’m gay) who would constantly pry into my personal life and overstep boundaries. Every time I would try to get him to understand that certain things are off limits as I feel uncomfortable discussing them he would stop for about a month and then bring it up again. The final straw was when I had to go do something and couldn’t talk anymore he said that I don’t have anything to do I just wanted to go “**** one of my friends.” Like… weird.
Final score:
20points
#17
Had been through it for about a year with my dog (three surgeries and all that fun stuff), I had been busting my behind to make sure he was okay and to make payments. I had a night or two planned away for my niece's 20th b-day and left my dog with my ex (we stayed friends and my dog like him 😑). I drove 5 hours and arrived at night to my destination to messages saying my dog had bad diarrhea and it wasn't stopping. As it was late, I stayed the night (didn't get much sleep due to the festivities) and drove back first thing in the morning and took him to the emergency vet. Turns out he had eaten one of my crafts and it had gotten lodged in his stomach (I know, I regret not putting it away properly) and he needed surgery most likely to remove it. This would be the 4th in 14 months. I was exhausted, sleep deprived, stressed, facing another big expense in so little time (did I mention a vehicle repair and dental work for me in between everything??) and I was messaging my ex saying, and I quote, "I don't know if I can go through this again..." AND HE WENT OFF. Saying if I couldn't take care of my dog I needed to give him to someone who could and on and on. No support or encouragement or nothing. At that time, I just didn't have the strength to take on that treatment and didn't deserve that. Got the surgery and my dog ended up passing about 3 months later from cancer. I gave everything for him. 💔 RIP sweet boy.
Final score:
20points
G҉A҉C҉H҉A҉ A҉L҉E҉X҉ 1 year ago
As I bet the dog thanks you for making his life, with less pain. He/she had a good life.
#18
When the person picked arguments over definitions of words that aren't normally fussed over. I'm pretty sure they'd have fought over the definition of "definition" if they got the notion. Since we both had English as a first language, and the same *dialect* to boot, it was.... ugh.
Final score:
19points
#19
When my mother told me that without her I'd end up on the streets, broke and alone.
I was 32 at the time, happily married with a daughter and another baby on the way, and doing very well in my job.
Yeah Mom, that'll happen.
Final score:
19points
censorshipsucks 1 year ago
I've had this happen with a family member but I simply turned it around and pointed at what an utter failure they were at life. They didn't do it again.
#20
When I came out to my "friend" of 6 years and she told my very conservative parents.
Final score:
19points
#21
Oh boy! I had a friend Scott who seemed like a cool guy. We messaged through Quora and didn’t talk much but he seemed nice. I later got a friend Axel who I REALLY vibe with. One day Axel is telling me about this weirdo who was sending him some really weird messages (like nsfw messages). We were talking about it and at some point he said the weirdo’s name was Scott.
Me: “Wait… Scott (last name)?!”
Axel: “Yeah! How did you know?”
Me: “Holy shít…”
Long story short I messaged him VERY ANGRY. He acted all confused to what I was talking about until I sent him the screenshots of his convo with Axel (Axel had sent me the screenshots prior). We didn’t really argue, just agree to stop being friends. Bullet dodged.
Final score:
15points
#22
My little brother would spam me with memes, gifs, and random texts/emojis when he knew I was trying to fall asleep. I still talk to him in real life… but he is blocked.
Final score:
15points
Autistic apricot 1 year ago
My sister does this but I just threaten to take screen shots and send them to our mum
#23
It must have been about 2 years ago now. I fell in love with a girl. For the story we'll just call her E. Anyway as I am (I don't really have a social filter) I just outright told her about my feelings. E was fine with it and even encouraged it. Over 6 months it grew and grew. In that time I gave her special attention, helped her with her problems, confronted people that were hostile to her and played games with her even sharing my favourites with her, made her gifts and a bit more. I got very little back in return but love is blind. So long as I was with E I was fine
After about 6 months into a sort of relationship I invited another friend of mine (We'll call her K) into the friend group both me and E were in. At first the two got along but then K posted some artwork she did and was proud of and E over criticized it in a really hurtful way. Nothing constructive at all and K flipped at her. The two got into a huge arguement that when I saw it, I got in the middle of it and broke it up. I did manage to convince E to apologise to her many days later of negotiation. But things began to change. E then invited her "boyfriend" to the group, one I had no knowledge about until he appeared. So me and him didn't really get on. And as E and K's rivalry grew, K left the friendship group as E began to hit on a guy that wasn't me or her boyfriend. And this third guy was gay to the point he had absolutely no interest in her
Eventually my feelings got a little too hurt and I confronted her about her boyfriend and hitting on the third guy while she was with me. I got told I was abusive, a creep and a sexually driven pervert for wanting attention and a little bit of respect from her and then she told all that to the rest of the friendship group. Everyone believed her immediately and I felt betrayed not to mention heartbroken. I left the friendship group to and decided to focus my efforts on going after K to see if she was alright. I blocked E right there and then. Good riddance
A few months after that and me and K were starting to get into a bit of a closer relationship. Not really boyfriend and girlfriend but just talking I'd say. She treated me with respect, I did all the things for her I did for E and it was going well. However one of K's friends who's name also begins with E so we'll call her E2, didn't like the fact me and K were getting along so well. I started getting some rather threatening DMs from E2 so I tried to talk to her about it. E2 was one of K's closest friends so I didn't want there to be a rift between us or out K in a compromising position. But E2 kept at it and our friendship broke apart. Then K heard about it rather quickly, presumably from E2 and she confronted me about why I was being rude to her friend and acting so nice to her after everything I put her through a few months ago with E. I was shocked to say the least. I tried to explain myself out of the situation but it didn't go down well and she accused me of making too many excuses. She accused me of being a sexually driven creep, emotionally abusive and clingy and then said she never wanted anything to do with me ever again and blocked me. E2 blocked me as well. And most of our mutual friends also stopped talking to me. It was E all over again and I just broke. 2 broken hearts, multiple ruined friendships and my reputation was destroyed. I developed various mental problems such as Psychosis and Suicidal depression and even had a few attempts I couldn't quite go through with and I didn't know why at the time. Eventually I did get other forms of help that have put me on the right path, I got new hobbies that detached me from everything that happened like baking and now I'm seeing someone else. We'll call her O. O is an angel and a sweetie and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for her. However we live far apart so I'm saving up the money to go see her again while I learn to drive
So I've blocked E and K and E2 blocked me. I'm living a new life with O now
Final score:
13points
#24
(I was in school)
My friend and I were dating when she became a sort of b***h. Like if I got hurt she’d fake being hurt and say I did it for attention and always take my lunch
But then she came out as non binary bc I was I asked why and she called me a fake b***h. I moved and blocked her but she’s still a big jerk
Final score:
12points
#25
When I put a funny meme on my Facebook about "I hate Mondays" and she commented that a Christian appreciates every single day they are alive. *Eye roll*
Final score:
12points
#26
There were many years and a long story leading up to this, but the final straw with a trust-fund-baby friend of mine was when she insisted on telling me over and over again about the $12,000 refrigerator she was remodeling her kitchen with, and then complained incessantly when she came to visit because my ice maker didn't work in my ancient old refrigerator that I could not afford even $1200 to replace.
Final score:
11points
#27
He went down an alt-right rabbithole... but he's south african. In love with ben shapiro, jordan peterson, joe rogan. Those idiots. But worse, also a TERF. Ranting about trans people. Trans people are like 0,2% of the population here. Zero reason to feel threatened by trans. Nope, all angry, wants to talk about it all the f*****g time. He blocked me.
Final score:
11points
#28
Yelled at me for not buying a video game pass. I blocked her/reported. I even had a new number. A week later I wake up to a call from an unknown number. It's her. She screams at me, saying I should k*ll myself and she hopes I get r*ped. I have been r*ped, plus, she knows I have had attempts on removing myself. She also has hit me many times, and I still have physical scars.
Final score:
11points
#29
I have blocked people for a lot of reasons, quite a lot of it was because of racism (I'm SEAn), bullying someone, or was known for harassing others. I'm a cosplayer so we get a lot of those.
The most recent was my ex-friends whom I felt uncomfortable because their circle of friends have become toxic and some have been sending death threats to one of my long time friends. One of them messaged me for unfriending them and when I told them why, sent hate messages to me and called me delusional, they also had me ostracized from our cosplay community, because they're well known cosplayers locally they spread around some rumors about me, so I blocked them. I have since quit cosplaying and have been looking for a different hobby just to avoid them.
Final score:
10points
Autistic apricot 1 year ago
That’s really sad, you shouldn’t have to quit bcs of people, are there any other cosplaying community’s you could join?
#30
One of my in-laws. Threatened me with violence because I asked him for a favour. Literally just asked him to house a friend for one night. He has 6 spare bedrooms. Just he lives at the house. Oh, and after threatning me with violence and cursing, etc., and I said "I didn't curse you," went on another rant threatening more violence. Then on top of that, he's a conspiracy nut and regularly sends patronising condescending emails to the rest of the family telling the that they are blind sheeple and can't see the truth etc. Yet apparently I'm the condescending one.
Final score:
10points
#31
I block people without hesitation. Usually when they start rambling about being antivax, or wishing we just kicked all the foreigners out, or complaining about pronouns, or being terfs, or any of those people who just don't understand we're all trying our best so let's accommodate whatever helps us all get through life with the least amount of stress and hassle. Who needs bigoted idiots in their lives? Into the block list you go, and then eventually out of the gene pool.
Final score:
10points
#32
She was actually at the capitol insurrection. She posted pictures. Live pictures. Said it was a moving experience and that the news reports were wrong. I was floored, and blocked her ASAP. She kept her idiocy really well hidden, we had no idea.
Final score:
10points
Katie Andrews 1 year ago
I hope you reported her to the FBI so they can press federal charges.
#33
My mother forgot my son's birthday four years running.
He's five.
And every time she comes to town, we hear about it at the last second if she has spare time around drinking with her friends or needs an errand buddy.
I'm her only child. My son is her grandchild and, except for my gf's son, will be her only grandchild. The lack of care while demanding we drop everything when she comes into town was the last straw on the back of a very overloaded camel
Final score:
10points
#34
When my former coworker/good friend was going through her 2nd divorce and thought it was her business to give me unsolicited marital advice. She also told everyone I was dirty and unkempt because my political views don’t match hers.
Final score:
9points
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 1 year ago
My sister keeps asking me when I'm going to settle down. This from a woman on her third marriage. Not blocked, but certainly don't talk a lot any more.
#35
I had a neighbor who was really helpful. He heard me cutting down my dead tree with a chainsaw and came over to help. I cut him out of my life because I made a Facebook post expressing concern and outrage at the distressingly high number of women and girls who are the victim of sexual harassment and assault. I posted it because I have a young daughter. His response was to ask me when I was coming out of the closet.
Final score:
9points
#36
Years ago, a friend got dumped by his girlfriend because he gave her stolen goods as a present. He began turning her friends against her and gaslighting her about her family issues. When I confronted him over it, he told me he was trying to get her to kill herself, then went on an insane rant about how when he took over the world, I would be first against the wall. He was expelled from our school shortly afterwards. I wish that this were made up, but he was a truly f****d up guy. Hope you got help Dave.
Final score:
9points
Asphalt Bubblegum 1 year ago
Genuine clinical psychotic breaks can happen at any time, but they generally trigger in a person's early twenties or thirties. This sounds like a classic case.
#37
So basically I was on skinseed, and there was this person saying that I make crappy skins, and I should go and uninstall Minecraft, keep in mind I was 8 lol. Then after I tried to block them, they created another account and spread more hate comments, which triggered me. The comments were like “Ew, bet your fam doesn’t love you.” Like come on! It’s just a n app…
Final score:
8points
#38
Stalked me online and at an event we both went to because he wanted to ask me out, but I have a boyfriend, who he also insulted. He is now blocked, although I unfortunately still see him regularly (he's friends with my brother).
Final score:
8points
#39
I was born to a very brilliantly attractive, charismatic, intelligent, multi-talented woman who didn't escape her hellish formative years entirely intact. The deal breaker though was that she'd have many opportunities to get the therapy she definately needed, but because she was so successful in her career, she felt this was proof she was fine. This, despite blowing through four marriages and divorces and having a long and colorful history of breaking any laws that stood between her and one of her objectives.
Always a negligent, arbitrary, and yet attention-seeking parent even in the best of times, when I turned fourteen, something snapped and she began seeeing me as her rival in all things, and after a few devasting stunts, she made me homeless. Thereafter, she kept reeling me back in to be her uncompensated personal attendant post-divorces or her full-time uncompesated in-home caregiver through her cancer treatments. During all of this, mom's "thanks" was to sabotage my every means to self-development and self-support. She turned every male of our mutual acquaintance against me; turned any attention given to me onto her alone, and often at my expense, and then it escalated into the downright criminal. The least was identity and assets thefts and frauds and the worst were major Calss A federal felonies. In her mind, all that she hated and rejected about herself, and, all that she wanted and couldn't have, were embodied in me.
I put up with far more than I ever should have for much longer than I should have because I was constantly force-fed the traditional fairytale that one is always obligated to forgive and attend to family even when that family member is literally bent on destroying you. I wanted my mother to love me, and I delusionally believed I could earn a love that never was and never would be available to me. My brother and other male family members would enable and justify mom's abuses of me, well past when these became crimes that should have put mom in a federal pen.
Mom did a lot of really terrible things to me, none of them being something a sane and self-respecting person can forgive. But, like most abuse victims, I had dysfunctional personal boundary issues, and I wasn't aware or self-respecting enough to do what I should have done so many years before. If you stick around, abusers always escalate, and it's you sticking around for more that makes them think you accept this behavior.
In 2008, I survived what should have been a fatal auto accident and after two years of rehabilitative therapies, I was still left with what would be permanent mobility, speech, and metabolic issues. My mother came to my home while I was out of it, and she stole everything out of my home and small business workshop that she could. She then gave away or threw away what she didn't want for herself. I can promise you, this was actually one of the lesser of her crimes against me, but, it was the one that ended us. She died never feeling remorse or regrets for what she'd done to me or anyone else.
When it comes to being abused, you only have two options for self-preservation. Never accept and allow the abusive behavior from the start, or, always go completely no contact once a person is clearly set on being malevolent toward you or toward others. Abuse survivors have boundary issues, which is what makes them vulnerable to being abused. You will need professionally qualified help to recondition your perceptions of your personal boundaries and perceptions. It's rellly, really, worth your investment. Don't let anyone else write or rewrite your narrative.
Final score:
8points
SheamusFanFrom1987 1 year ago
Some parents are never meant to be forgiven. I hope you have found some semblance of peace (never easy, I know) and more importantly, that the pathetic, miserable, disgusting miscreant of a mother you had is now burning up way, way down south where the inferno is. No child should go through that at the hands of their parents, mum or dad...
#40
I block on the first straw. Life is too short to suffer fools.
Final score:
8points
#41
Several years back. A distant family member online. There was a news item about a bus load of school children being killed by a wayward missle attack somewhere in the middle east. His comment was that there were now 30 less terrorists. Have not communicated with him since.
Final score:
8points
Brenda Spagnola-Wilson 1 year ago
Seriously!?! They were innocent children. I would have blocked them too
#42
My friends blocked each other over venison a while ago.
Final score:
7points
#43
Years ago I did some online dating. I'd been chatting online for a couple of days with this person (man A), we'd not exchanged too many messages and it was fairly light hearted superficial chat-there was no sexual banter or d**k pics. I was online responding to another person (man B) one evening, when man A popped up in a dialogue box to say hi. There was a bit of delay in my response and he asked why-when I told him I was messaging someone else, he totally lost it. He started sending the most vile, abusive messages calling me sl*t, saying I'd been leading him on, that I was cheating on him, that I wasn't allowed to talk to any other man without his permission, that I was nothing but a who*e that deserved to get raped because I'd been unfaithful, that I was the same as all the other slags out there. At this point, we'd exchanged a few innocuous messages-no pictures, no phone calls, no face-to-face dates. I blocked him after he started threatening to find me and give me what I deserved, and reported him to the dating website. It put me off dating for a while.
Then I had another dating disaster-we'd chatted online, seemed to get on OK and arranged to meet up. I arrived at the venue, and started receiving a series of text messages "I like that jacket you're wearing," "your hair is longer than it was in your photo," "You're taller than I thought you'd be" It was obvious he could see me but I couldn't see him. After a few messages, I asked him to stop because it was freaking me out, but he wouldn't show himself, so I walked out. I then got bombarded with abusive texts about not having a sense of humour, and how I ruined the date because I wouldn't play along. It was seriously creepy, I was worried he'd follow me home. So he got blocked too.
Final score:
6points
#44
Anti-vaxxers and anyone else spouting unscientific excrement from their "own research".
Final score:
6points
Natasha 1 year ago (edited)
Amazing how many people have back flipped when one of their own died, have long-standing health issues or have been hospitalised. It is a very different perspective when faced with the reality of how it has now directly affected you, your family and thoes you care about.. How as an educated society do we have people wanting to drag us back to the 1800's.
#45
Her being toxic and petty after we had a small argument
Final score:
5points
#46
TW // abuse
My mom broke up with her boyfriend of five years after withstanding abuse and emotional manipulation because “he was getting better” and “getting off his meds for PTSD/anxiety/ADD/depression was helping him.” He exploded and was a general b***h until he moved out.
He had been texting me saying how much he loved and missed me, and I just didn’t respond. One day, my mom shows me a text from him. It includes all the good stuff, folks: victim blaming, saying my dad killed himself over heartbreak (no) and her other ex wanted to (idk if this is true) and now he saw why, as well as lamenting about how she was manipulating me and my brother into not wanting to see him. He also threatened to come up to where we’ve moved to in another state and not leave because we’re his kids too. Her intent was to get a laugh and a “what an idiot” out of me. I was so angry. I angry cried and ranted and my mom apologized for showing me. I blocked him and tried to get her to do the same, but she had to stay in contact because she had taken out a loan for him and needed him to pay her back.
I have nightmares about him showing up at my school. I hate him and I wish I could’ve got my mom to cut it off sooner.
Final score:
5points
SheamusFanFrom1987 1 year ago
In this case, I think the blasted National Guard needs to get involved. He isn't getting better, he's likely not taking his meds on purpose and just generally being a detriment to OP and mum. If he doesn't get back to his senses soon, drastic action has to be taken (last resort but if it has to be done to save lives...).
#47
my friend was out of work and really struggling. i paid his rent and bought food for him and his kid for nearly 8 months. i logged onto facebook and he was slagging me off to everyone and somehow could afford to go to the bar everyday. i just mentioned i was no longer going to support him or feed his kids because of what he was saying and somehoe i was the bad guy. i'm glad his ex now has the kids after i gave her copies of each payment. f**k you chris
Final score:
5points
Brenda Spagnola-Wilson 1 year ago
He had drinking money but not money to feed his children!?! A$$hole
#48
2021. India saw the deadly second wave caused by the delta variant. The curve was gradually declining. At this point, let me clear the fact that me and my family maintained every kind of covid safety protocol (wearing masks, social distancing, washing hands, separate set of clothes for going out, sanitizer etc.). By the grace of God, we surpassed the first and second wave safely.
As the graph went down & strictness eased, we were visited by some of our relatives who're apparently 'covid-deniers'.
Coincidentally, the day they went away, me and my whole family were down with covid with no-one to look after us. We managed by whatever means we could. Totally drained, weak to the core, sleeping through the day etc. When we confronted them, they straight up denied the fact that they possibly could've carried the virus.
Now don't get me wrong here. We were still on with our regular schedule alongside maintaining what we used to. But this sudden visit from our "loved ones" made all the change. Post-covid, I had an episode of panic-attack with tachycardia and then diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). My parents had some other post-covid complications.
This was followed by a long argument and then blocking each other in every possible way. The pandemic showed the real faces of people around me.
Final score:
5points
Autistic Ladybug 1 year ago
Ohno.... Well if you need me, i have anxiety and autism, so panic attacks are the norm. Venting is good so i'll listen and give you advice. Ur not alone :)
#49
An ex broke up with me over text and just couldn’t wrap their head around why I was upset. He was a jerk and dated my friend a month or so later.
Final score:
4points
#50
Sadly, it was politics. The Clinton v. Trump election. For the most part, the people I conversed with/debated with were mildly heated. However, a person I've known since high school was in no way shape or form able to talk to me in a respectful and calm manner on the subject. They were 100% pro-Trump and anybody not voting for him were "so in the dark, a blind sheep, and stupid for thinking she will help you!" It got even worse from there. I had to block them off of FB and cut all ties with them. Over a difference of opinion. I couldn't believe it. But, as the election went on, and the 4 years after, I could easily believe it. So sad people get that heated and vile just b/c someone doesn't agree with them on something.
Final score:
4points
Brenda Spagnola-Wilson 1 year ago
I simply scroll past any and all political posts. It's not worth my time to debate when others turn it into a fight
#51
Friend of mine was very high maintenance. She required almost constant attention, and for her feelings/requirements to be taken into consideration before anyone else's. She was exhausting, honestly.
One day she posted on Facebook looking for someone to help her out with a car to borrow as hers was in for repair. Several of her friends offered their cars, mostly offering for the upcoming weekend. She came into the small group chat we had and complained nastily about the "c**p cars" she was expected to drive, and how useless her friends were for not offering better cars at a better time for her. She wanted a GOOD car, NOW and her friends SUCK.
I realised that she was almost certainly talking about me behind my back the way she talked about all her other friends, and blocked her.
Final score:
4points
#52
Reconnected with an old friend after about 30 years. Our friendship ended after she was incredibly awful in public to her partner and various other toxic behaviours. When we met again it was all about her, her life, her family, her career etc.....she asked almost nothing about me and if I tried to discuss anything she would change the subject or look in her phone. I was going to walk away but then she became ill and was hospitalised. Her sister, with whom she lives, rang and asked me to go to the hospital as she was asking for me. I stupidly went back and forward visiting and supporting her. When she went on holidays I loaned her money to go and travelled between my place and hers to ensure all was okay. I found myself paying for every outing, groceries, things she 'needed' with rarely even a thank you. Final straw was taking steaks etc to her place one afternoon to bbq only to find she had ordered herself takeout as she 'couldn't wait'. I had even texted that i was on my way. It wasn't even 6pm when I arrived. I stayed, ate a salad by myself (she was glued to her phone) and then left after she suggested that I could leave the meat I brought with me and they would have it the next day. I took all the groceries with me. Screw that. I never went back. Her sister reached out but I was done. Her sister is lovely and I felt bad about her but my ex-friend just hasn't learned about giving and receiving.....just about taking. I blocked her on social media but not on my phone as I asked her to repay me the money she owes. At the current rate it will be about 3+ years before it is paid off. I don't think she thought I would request back the loan and was very resentful when I did. The ONLY reason she is repaying is her sister doesn't know she borrowed it and I have indicated I would tell her if it is not repaid in full.
Final score:
4points
Katie Andrews 1 year ago
I'm glad you have leverage, because without it, you would never have been repaid.
#53
it was on a kids website so i actually couldn’t block it, but a girl showed up on my sister’s account telling that her art was bad and not “real” art. the situation escalated, and her sister came to tell us six paragraphs long of why we need to die, that we should have a stroke, that our mother probably throws our art away (uh what), that we don’t look at our canvases while drawing, etc. then she accused US of bullying. i later got banned for retaliating (i said “if i was really petty, i would write six paragraphs long on why you deserve to die, following up with routine insults. lucky for you, i’m not!”). Eriko_San and theoldiesarethebest, i will always hate you.
Final score:
3points
Markus It/He/E 1 year ago
Real question why did this "kids website" not have any kind of blocking function? That's not safe
#54
I'm pretty friendly and sociable online, and I'm pretty quick to add people to my friends list. There was one dude that after a bit, I wasn't quite gelling with. I didn't think much of it, not everyone clicks in the same way. Anyway one day he got into an argument with one of my friends and I said "hi, not getting involved". I got banned from his server because I was friends with the one he was arguing with. I was pissed so I told him to go fvck himself. Should've blocked him then lol. It took being sent a homophobic hate video, called slurs, and being told to kms which was the actual last straw. What a absolute c**t. I must add he turned on his oldest friend of us too because she was close to the person he was arguing with too. Apparently he encouraged members of his server to send hate messages to all of us. F**k him. I should've trusted the bad vibes
Final score:
3points
#55
He knew it was my birthday, saw all my posts about it and just ignored. Not even a "Hbd".
Final score:
3points
Danish Susanne 1 year ago
Hope you dropped the acquaintance, when he showed you just how much he cared.
#56
1. Borderline friend for years and years. She had married my ex and kinda made me her mother subsitute or something. I never could get rid of her pre-computer world. After 35-40 years she adopted a friend's kitten and planned to pay the vet under the table to declaw it. She had older cats that were declawed but she knew I detested the practice. So at long last I set myself free.
2. I knew her for 30 years and always knew I was in her 4th circle of friends. She drank and needed a chauffeur. I stayed in the friendship because I didn't let the toxicity get to me. I had companionship for events. I also had pets I loved. They were starting to develop mid-life issues but they weren't ready to let go yet. She started pushing me every time we talked to put them down like she got something out of it. She told me about a conversation with her insurance broker who had a disabled child. When she told me she had had a "serious talk" with him about institutionalizing the son "to make it easier" on the son when the broker passed. BLOCKED
Final score:
3points
Danish Susanne 1 year ago
I think you waited too long to block her. She may have believed that her behavior was all right with you.
#57
Okay so a little bit of background, my step-monster is a narcissist and liked to create problems and drama out of nothing. Like she would gas light me and my sisters by telling us she got screen shots of our conversations over text from her phone provider trying to get us to confess to something.
Anyway about a year ago now when my younger sister was still 17 and living with my dad and step-monster, she was had graduated early and was the only person in that house working full time. They would charge her for a bunch of random things just to get most of her check.
Well one day she called me in tears saying how she couldn't take living there anymore. They constantly would put her down and shame her by calling her a whore when she wanted to dress cute just because she is beautiful.
So of course being her big sister I picked her up and talked to the police about getting her emancipated since she was only a couple months away from being an adult. We got misinformation and ended up getting the cops called to my house and made my sister go back home.
After that my step-monster went around telling everyone that I kidnapped my sister so I blocked her and my dad.
The day my sister turned 18 I came to pick her up at 3am and we drove away from that house and once we turned the corner she hugged me crying thanking me for helping her get away from them.
I am so much more at peace not having to pretend to like her just to be around my siblings, cutting her out of my life has been the best.
Final score:
3points
#58
He threw a can of coke at my head
Final score:
3points
#59
I an Admin in a very small Discord server, it was only me and 1 other Admin, anyways she had a little brother who was 9 years old and he joined the server and he demanded Admin permissions. For those who do not now it is against the TOS to be under 13, and I refused. The other Admin (big sister) told me her little brother was in tears. And she told me she was going to report me to the owner for being mean to her little sister when all I did was refuse to give a 9 year old Administrator perms.
Yeah, and she definitely got blocked.
Final score:
2points
Rocke-Road (Submission author) 1 year ago (edited)
I wish I could edit posts! I did not mean to say little sister! I meant to say little brother! Sorry if you got confused!
#60
Any of those wierdos with the fake icloud- emails sending links they think people are gonna click on. Some people are gullible as heck. I am not one of those people.
Final score:
2points
#61
I recently blocked my sister in law and her moron husband. They were staying with us and I had to have a kidney biopsy done. This required me to be overnight in the hospital to watch for internal bleeding. When my husband brought me home on Saturday morning they were blaring music and making as much noise as they possibly could. My husband asked them to turn the music down so that I could go to sleep, and while they did turn it down as soon as my husband walked away from them her husband started yelling 'F--- her and F--- her nap, who sleeps in the middle of the day, its time to get loud and party as well as saying everyone hates me and I should just F--- off. Well my husband heard all this and confronted them and it turned into an even bigger argument. One in which his sister accused of us doing illegal things (we aren't), not taking care of our kids (we do), and defrauding the government (of course not). Funny thing is, she is guilty of all these things but wanted to make us look like we are. Let's just say they are no longer welcome in our lives or our children's as we can not be sure of what kind of crazy stuff they may say to them when we are not present.
Final score:
2points
SheamusFanFrom1987 1 year ago
Good riddance to "family-related" bottom-feeding miscreants, I'd say. Smh...
#62
Fat jokes by others and an ex friend that gaslighted me
Final score:
1point
#63
When my cousin texted me that I wasnt "family" anymore, and that she would teach her 4 kids to disrespect me (I helped take care of them while living with them for 2 years)
This is after she ran around calling my immediate family and friends (mom dad sisters coworkers etc.) and told them that i was trying to "steal" her wife from her...
Final score:
1point
#64
I get a text from a friend asking if she could ask me a really weird question. I say go for it.
Long story short, she was showing this guy some pictures of her boyfriend and showed a picture with me it it. The guy saw the picture and asked her if he could meet me. He was apparently a friend of a friend.
She asks me and I warily say yes, knowing I could block him because he wanted to meet over Instagram.
I was very 2D with him and didn't say much about myself, but red flags were popping up. He said that my friend told him that I am a country kid and liked Christian guys, send me pictures of himself for no reason, he was in high school still (I'm a freshman in college) and goes to a no-name school on my town. I played along and being polite.
Then he said that he makes me happy.
This was two hours after exchanging insta handles.
Instant block.
Apparently told my friend that I made him happy and that I was really pretty. She knew she made a mistake when that happened.
Final score:
1point
#65
they were been transphobic 😢🤮
Final score:
1point
#66
It was a whole drama in a small community, that I was absent for so I had missed it. I kept in contact with the guy (SB) not knowing anything had happened and one day I invited him to a discord server called "Counting" (it had a stupid KEL picture as the icon) and I got a message telling me to remove SB and block him. I trusted the person who sent me the message (HM) and so I asked why. Turns out SB was very sexist and was very toxic. I trusted HM and removed and blocked SB.
Final score:
1point
#67
On an art site, I had attracted someone who liked my work. No big deal at first. One day, she asked for a request despite the fact that I don't take requests. I was getting worried that she was going to be one of those "choosing beggars" I had heard horror stories about, especially because her request was quite literally worded as "please please please draw this for me", but thankfully she took it fairly well at first.
However, I later learned that she had traced one of my art pieces to make into a free-to-use base, and was using this base for her own drawings. Promptly blocked her after that, and then blocked her again when she made a new account just to get around it.
Final score:
1point
#68
On Reddit, there was this one user who would constantly cyberbully me. The last straw was when they called me a swear word and told me to kill myself. I have now cut all ties with this person and have gone offline.
Final score:
1point
#69
There's this one girl who I've been friends with for a while now. She kind of "weird" as people would describe her but I didn't care.
See the thing with her is she does not respect boundaries. I don't know if it's just me but at a certain point she was being obnoxious and always crossing the line. Like how I keep telling her I genuinely hate it when she steals things from my backpack and makes me do some obscure thing to get it back. Like what?😅 we are in highschool
Anyway, one day I posted a funny photo of my cat stretched out on my bed(Like a normal catowner) and she responded to my story with "Do you f*ck your cat?"
I still kind of talk to her today and I genuinely don't know how to unblock her
Final score:
1point
Danish Susanne 1 year ago (edited)
You should find out, how to block her, befor you get too downtrodden to remember to do so. Friends are those people around you, that makes you feel better, and are willing to help you, not making your life more difficult.
#70
A friend of mine had been crossing boundaries I had made very clear to them. These included things along the lines of sending me cursed images and depression jokes when they had been told not to because it was hurting my mental health. They also consistently were getting my pronouns wrong (I go by they/them). It got to the point I talked to two different school counselors about her actions before eventually blocking her. I eventually unblocked her since I didn’t want to lose a friendship I have had since I was 7. Our relationship is better currently, but still slightly strained.
Final score:
1point
#71
Guys sorry for paragraph but I need to give a lot of background info:
In year 6, I had a good friend called... let's use her real name because she deserves to be confronted... Zahrah. Me and Zahrah were inseperable. We wrote songs together and planned a courier together as singers. Only problem was, she had a horrible friend called Alexa. Now Alexa was your mean-girl stereotypical soon-to-be-bully, and i didn't notice all of the huge red flags popping up. She'd exclude me in group activities and had a really mean friend Elyce. Elyce was MEAN. She was rough and she swore a lot and she went through puberty before all of us, so we thought she was "SO cool". Then we have side members, Halle and Narjes (Jess for short).
When we went to camp, we were all put in the same cabin together. Mind you, I had not been diagnosed with autism, and only knew i had Anxiety, so i was already nervous to be there for...3 days i think? Anyways, I got super excited and was thinking how much fun this will be, and how I was not going to miss home as much. And so day 1 went well. But at night, i had a panic attack. You see, i also have not enough melatonin to put me to sleep, and now i taake meds for it, but at the time i needed music. But the headphones wouldnt connect with my iPod (as that was all i was permitted to take due to rules with no phone policies and my music was on the phone), and even the night guard had to come in and help with it, which i found even more terrifying at the time. But he was really nice. I kept sobbing and crying and breathing so lightly i thought i would pass out, but i calmed down eventually. Then he had me put on my music out loud. My friends said they were ok with that, but in the morning they were complaining about how loud and annoying it was.
Next day was ok, but GET THIS. My headphones finally connected that night, but my friends ASKED ME TO PUT IT ON SPEAKER. They said they were just joking then and said it was super calming, but i declined.
Last day, was super excited to go back home. That evening, in my cabin it was utter chaos. We had to get ready for a dancing thing to celebrate (?) and I was panicking again, so I did what calmed me down, and read my Harry Potter book. But Elyce and the others didnt understand. She yelled at me and called me a "f**king b***h" and the others pressured me until i had an overload. I was screaming and crying and they were saying "Don't cry like a baby, grow up!" I turned to my (at the time) Bff who i thought i could rely on, but she yelled at me too and abused me. I stormed out of the cabin and shut the door but they LOCKED IT. For ages i sat outside and cried, cuz i wasnt supposed to be out there and i would get in trouble, but then they opened the door and said really nicely that they were sorry, btu giggled and were acting weird. After that, I reported them to a really helpful teacher (Bless you, Ms Mackenzie) and she helped. That night, they woke me at like 2:45 by all going to the bathroom at the same time and flushing really loud, no regards to me. And then they started eating lollies that Elyce had stashed in her bag, WHICH WERE NOT ALOWED. I asked them to please stop, its too early, but they didn't, and so i asked more firmly. They were offended and rude, but quietened down, but at 3:00 they began talking louder once again, which woke me up AGAIN. I said "well i'm awake now, and there's no point going back to sleep now. Can I at least have some candy?" but to my utter horror and surprise, they told me "No, you were rude to us and have been mean the whole time and yelled at us. An anyways, there's nothing left!" and then laughed. So when I got back, long story short, they continued bullying me and so I eventually had to block Zahrah on everything i could possibly find and cut her out forever.
Sorry for the huge paragraph, I've been through a lot of sh!t... Don't read it if you don't want to. I hate hearing the name zahrah (sorry to all the nice Zahrahs)
Final score:
1point
#72
I met my (ex) internet friend for the first time earlier this year. I visited her. I drove hours to her place, picked her up and drove even further to the capital to spend some quality time with her. Turns out she's full of herself. She only wanted to do what she likes, didn't care about what I wanted to do and talked about her self constantly. I was having a rough time this year but she didin't care. I stopped texting her when I got back home. She asked what was wrong and I just explained that with dealing with bs with a guy I liked, two jobs, no time off and moving it's really hard to grab a clear thought. Still she made it all about herself and about how hard her 2022 was as well - NO you live with your parents, don't have to pay for anything and you don't even have a job and don't care to get one! All she does is hang around her dads house all day but somehow thinks she has it harder than I do being on my own working 7 days a week. I don't want to pity myself but that made me so mad I just blocked her.
Final score:
0points
#73
i had friends that had developed from working with them for over 20 yrs. we all retired and scattered to respective retired areas so social media was a connection we could keep. over the years we were together we respected each other and our respective views and opinions. but, once apart it seemed that respect fell apart. regardless of a post being twisted humor or funny political (nothing ever mean or insulting and it was the kind of thing we shared in connected life) i started getting sent to facebook jail on a regular basis. finally decided that i would not allow them to censor my thoughts anymore and blocked them. it's sad because i still care about them.
Final score:
0points
#74
The little b***h told my best friends abusive sister that she was venting. Thank god my friend was spending the weekend with me. She was also just a horrible and annoying person.
Final score:
0points
#75
Chatting with a guy I had met on Facebook dating, and all seemed to be going okay... until he sent me an article about Richard Simmons. Okay? He knows I value getting in shape and losing weight? He said it reminded me of him. I asked him how, since the article was all about Simmons not being seen. He said, you're an introvert. Richard Simmons has become a shut-in, a recluse, and a hermit. Instant block and delete. Dude doesn't even comprehend my entire temperament, is completely ignorant of what introversion is, we are done. Let the ghosting begin.
Final score:
0points
#76
Long story short, it involved a middle school, discord, and a restraining order
Final score:
0points
#77
I've never gotten along well with one of my cousins, for many reasons, but this was the final straw.
My daughter (who was almost 2 at the time) and I went to go stay with my aunt after she and my cousin came to visit.
They lived in Scotland, which is like a day's drive from where I used to live.
On the way, I was in the back with my daughter and cousin's son; my cousin and aunt were in the front. I was in the middle, and I could clearly see my cousin's phone as she was texting her fiancee at the time.
I'd never met the guy, and he knew nothing about me. My cousin sends a couple of texts to him; one said that I wanted nothing to do with my mum, even though she was dying of cancer.
Well, firstly, she was NOT dying; and secondly, my mum is an emotionally abusive narcissist, and we have a difficult relationship.
My cousin then sent another message, saying that I called my daughter fat, but feed her nothing but junk.
I have NEVER called my daughter fat; and do not feed her junk all the time.
I didn't say anything at the time, but it was awkward af when I then had to meet this guy in person.
After we got home, I sent my cousin a FB message, telling her I'd seen the texts, and thought she was a POS for that and other reasons; then I blocked her.
That was like the second time in my life I'd felt able to call anyone out on their bs.
Final score:
0points
SaneMinotaur (she/her) (Submission author) 1 year ago
Btw my cousin and aunt are very much holier than thou when it comes to food and diet. My daughter has always had a balanced diet, but she is also allowed junk sometimes, because I don't want to restrict her diet and cause her to have eating disorders. She is 9 now and perfectly healthy, no issues with weight or health. She has pizza and MacDonald's sometimes, and I see no problem with that, personally.
#78
there was a girl that loved to say, oh she's faking for attention, i'm pretty sure she doesn't even have PTSD but then she made of my friend with a fainting disorder then i killed and blocked her
Final score:
0points
What do you think ?
Danish Susanne 1 year ago
I sometimes think that people talk of friends, that I would only call acquaintances. And sometimes I wouldn't even admit to that, if they behaved in a way, that made me feel bad.
Danish Susanne 1 year ago
I sometimes think that people talk of friends, that I would only call acquaintances. And sometimes I wouldn't even admit to that, if they behaved in a way, that made me feel bad.
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