Hey Pandas, What Question Did You Ask That Changed Your Life? (Closed)

Answer whatever.

I asked a colleague of mine “Maybe we could get some coffee together one of this that’s?”. Seven years later we are still together and share a home and two dogs.

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30points

Burs

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Burs (Submission author) 3 years ago

Correction: “One of this days” not “one of this that’s. F*****g autocorrrect.

15points

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Shortly after my daughter was born, I started experiencing panic attacks and anxiety. A few months later and I still found it really hard to adapt to motherhood. You know, your schedule being dictated by a very demanding baby (mine was), always being tired, never getting things done, and feeling lonely. My baby was planned and a very desired one, but I kept wondering what the hell I had been thinking and that I was totally unfit and hopeless as a mother.
One evening in an anxiety fit I remember asking myself: what type of mother do I want to be for this little girl?... then I went a bit further: what type of human being do I want my daughter to see in me?
I got terrified. I didn't want my daughter to have a emotionally unstable, selfish, immature, ashamed of herself, extremely insecure mother.
I realized I was far from someone that I would be proud of. I knew deep inside who I truly was, but I was so full of insecurities, shame, guilt, stupid and obsolete belief that I had lost the idea of who I was.
From that day, I started the long, incredible, strange, difficult and challenging journey of unmasking myself, forgiving myself and becoming true to myself. Many ups and downs, not fully yet there and perhaps this journey will last my whole life, but it makes me truly happy to see how much I have become more coherent and true to myself.
It took me some years to finally start enjoying being mother. And now, 10 years later, I feel very happy with myself, both as a mother and as a human being.

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Final score:

29points

M Calad

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Kathy L 3 years ago

WooHoo! Good for you for hanging in with the uncomfortable feelings and examining what it all meant. You've transformed yourself and your relationship with your daughter. You're an inspiration!

7points

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When I didn't like myself very much, I asked myself: Why am I not being the person I want to be?
From that point, I started being my true self and found happiness.

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Final score:

28points

Aelita Senvaitytė

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Sandra Boyd 3 years ago

Ah. One day I woke up and asked myself, "Why do I always think of the disasters that might happen, and not the happy events?" And my outlook changed to happiness, too.

8points

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Who cares? Once you stop worrying about other people judging you, life opens up. Dress how you want, try out new hobbies, see that move alone. As long as your not hurting yourself or others, who cares?

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24points

Rae Reyn

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Night Owl 3 years ago

I hope to one day come to that point in my life

2points

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"Listen, I really like you and I was wondering if you would go out for a walk on the promenade and a drink?".
I said this for the first time to a girl I liked. I was 28, had recently left my home country to search for a better life and was working as a bartender in a famous location in Malta. She was my colleague and had also moved away from her country to travel and see the world.
6 years later, we are engaged, have stable jobs (in her country), a new house and a 9 month old boy. I love her with all my heart, and life has never been better.
None of that would have happened if I hadn't swallowed my insecurities and simply asked her out.
To all the lonely pandas out there, sometimes happiness is a single question away.

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Final score:

24points

Pa4040

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$copper-fractions avatar$

Tiny Dynamine 3 years ago

Lovely story. I wish you all well.

2points

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Do I really want to be alone forever? That question set me down a path that led me to declaring my love to my now-fiance, finding my true self again after 30 years of repression, and living my life to the fullest.

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19points

Sky Render

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Thorfin Wolfsbane 3 years ago

I asked myself that question, but my answer was a big fat HELL YES! I love being on my own and alone.

9points

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If not now? then when?

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17points

katz up!

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Nina 3 years ago

True! ✌

3points

When I'm struggling and self-criticism takes over, I try to remember to ask myself whether this would be something I would say to my daughter or to a friend if they had the same struggle. I would never be so harsh to other people!

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17points

Kathy L

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G Oezoe 3 years ago

i imagine an old homophobic racist transphobic white karen is saying all that stuff haha!

3points

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When I'm upset about something, I ask myself this series of questions: Will it matter tomorrow? Will it matter next week? or next month? or next year? If the answer to any of those questions is no, then it doesn't matter.

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Final score:

17points

marianne eliza

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$copper-fractions avatar$

Tiny Dynamine 3 years ago

This is a great way to approach life. Take note, people!

2points

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#10

Is it worth a lifetime of sadness and disappointment because of a promise I made in my early 20s

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Final score:

13points

Monica Michelle

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Rannveig Ess 3 years ago

Of course it isn't. If you knew it would make you sad when you made it, you wouldn't have made it. "If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?" serial killer Anton Chigurh said, in the movie "No Country For Old Men"

4points

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#11

Why? I've asked that question all my life. E.G. Someone: 'Steve, people have actually eaten Tide Pods!'. Me: Why?

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13points

Steve Barnett

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Night Owl 3 years ago

LMAO

3points

#12

Why am I alive? From that point on, I have been figuring out who I truly am and why I am here.

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Final score:

10points

Lexi Stoffel

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Thorfin Wolfsbane 3 years ago (edited)

well, you see, when two people really really really love each other...and some birds and some bees get involved...

4points

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#13

Why is cheese?

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10points

Yeezy

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Happi doggi 3 years ago

Why not cheese, the delicious 400 types of cheese from Switzerland. WHY NOT CHEESE???

5points

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#14

Lord, what is mine to do?

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9points

Michael Carpenter

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Steve Barnett 3 years ago

Lord Vader: There will be a substantial reward for the one who finds the Millennium Falcon.

7points

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#15

What will I regret at the end of my life? That question is what helps me strike a balance between work and life (or how much money do I really need?), it gets me off the couch to go do something with my wife, my daughter, or both, and gives me a perspective when it comes to buying something (the balance between buying something and doing something). It gives me hope and eases anxiety when the bills are piling up or when I’m having a crappy day (I don’t think I will ever regret not worrying or not getting mad). It helps me care less about what party holds office and what they are doing. In other words, it helps keep me focused on the journey, nit the destination. It means to me that life can be wonderful, I just can’t let the minutia keep me down.

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Final score:

9points

Jerry Mathers

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HammerzToe 3 years ago

Excellent!

0points

#16

Do I get on the plane? I flew into Corpus Cristi Texas during hurricane Harvy to meet the man that has been the ONLY constant in my whole life. I took that leap of faith, and it was the best thing that I have ever done. Today is our 4 year anniversary!

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Final score:

9points

Victoria Clarke

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Lexi Stoffel 3 years ago

Amazing! I hope you have/had an awesome anniversary!

1point

#17

What should i become ?

now i changed my routine, left my clumsy habits behind and started doing better and i rigorously planned. hopefully the outcomes will be desirable

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Final score:

9points

Aaradhana Mani

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#18

"i'd like some help"

To the doctor

To psychologist

To supposed "friends"

The responses made me realise how incredibly little i matter and that all the mental health awareness stuff is pure fluff... and has absolutely no substance...

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Final score:

9points

ben woskje

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Joanne Hudson 3 years ago

Keep asking. Look in different places. There is more than doctor, psychologist, "friend". You won't find the answer sitting around waiting for them to find you. And if you don't find people with answers, what difference does it make? You matter to yourself. All the rest is shadows.

2points

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#19

Someday I will be 40. What do I want to have and who do I want to be at that time?

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Final score:

8points

Jake

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Leigh C. 3 years ago

I want to be happy with the people I love most.

1point

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#20

What do I believe in, and why?
Everyone believe. It can be a political party, yourself, money, a religion, a philosophy or maybe you believe that nothing really matters except your own life. Everybody believe in something, but a lot of people do not know why. I wanted to know.

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Final score:

6points

Erik Granqvist

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California Jones 3 years ago

Important not to have blind faith.

2points

#21

When I decided to start looking into the reasons for a meat-free diet, I learned about the myriad of environmental, health and animal welfare impacts. At the end of it, the only counter-argument I had left for eating meat was "Because it's delicious." Ever the pragmatist, I imagined a similar scenario playing out at work; a colleague would propose two competing ideas to management: the current way, and a new way which was better for everyone in every holistic and measurable way. Then the employee would decide to stick with the current way, just because "I like this one better." How quickly would management see red and fire them for giving such a reckless, thoughtless excuse? I had to ask myself, "Knowing what I know, would I allow myself to make such a selfish decision in any other circumstance?" That was the logic that made me decide to go vegetarian/vegan.

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Final score:

5points

[]

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HammerzToe 3 years ago

Good for you!

0points

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#22

“Can we be friends?” First friendship that I actually now realize was a crush. She’s lesbian and I’m bi. Unfortunately I moved the day after she came out.

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Final score:

4points

Happi doggi (all pronouns)

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Happi doggi (Submission author) 3 years ago

We jokingly kissed like 5 times throughout the years. She told me she enjoyed it. Tbh, I did too.

2points

#23

where do babies come from?

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Final score:

4points

Rage of Aquarius

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Annie 3 years ago

Uhhhhhhhh

1point

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#24

What is the meaning of life? The answer is simply to live and enjoy

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Final score:

4points

Beta

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Samantha Lomb 3 years ago

3points

#25

when will a life of loss and grief unbound me from pain and loneliness. never

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Final score:

3points

miss miss

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Moodles 3 years ago

Only if you let it x

3points

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#26

I've asked many questions that have changed my life.
Asked a guy on twitter for advice and that led to us bonding as friends and later lovers. This led to a lot of firsts: passport, booking and flying on a plane, taking a trip outside of my country.

But I think the most notable of recent is asking my dad why he always reaches out so sporadically and why it feels like I'm outside of the family, and why there was years when I hadn't heard from him. The reply was not good and I realized he never really cared about me nor thinks of me as much as he claimed. In a way he answered the question.

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Final score:

3points

MyOpinionHasBeenServed

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HammerzToe 3 years ago

That's sad and hurtful. I'm sorry you had to hear those things.

0points

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#27

Why are there so many illogical points and inconsistencies in Christianity?

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Final score:

3points

Zophra

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#28

Why can't I?

As in why can't I be a mechanic?
Why can't I do something for a living that men usually do and not a woman...? Why can't I?

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Final score:

3points

HammerzToe

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LegendYak 3 years ago

You should be able to

1point

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#29

Who can beat Goku?

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Final score:

2points

KingJK04

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#30

“Why are you?” Some kid asked. Great. Now I have depression. hek u lil kiddo

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Final score:

2points

シ ^*’-BLOODLUST-‘*^ シ

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#31

Why am I mean to myself? (Still haven't found an answer yet it still hasn't stopped 🤔)

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Final score:

2points

LegendYak

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HammerzToe 3 years ago

Sometimes we do mean things to ourselves because we feel we don't deserve... don't deserve to be happy, don't deserve to have something, don't deserve. But that is the wrong way to think. We all deserve to be happy, to enjoy life.

1point

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#32

Why do I exist?
Imagine. I could've been a pig for slaughter. I could have been a border collie. Us humans are pretty lucky to exist, ya know.

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Final score:

2points

Game Over

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HammerzToe 3 years ago

No doubt!

1point

#33

Why couldn't I have been more patient? I get frustrated when a loved one becomes frail or very ill and I realized that my impatience is actually fear of losing them.

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Final score:

1point

Caro Caro

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#34

WHile back when I first started therapy. This convo changed my life.

Me: I can live almost every enviorment, that does not bother me, I can adjust myself.

Therapist: You can live. But is it really living? Are you live or just existed? Is this the life you want, just surviving?

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Final score:

1point

Eda Müftüoğlu

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What do you think ?

HooowlAtTheMoon 3 years ago

Me and my friend were having a conversation and they were telling me i needed to go to sleep but i wanted to talk to them so i was trying to annoy them until they gave up and they said "you need sleep to live" and i asked "who said i wanted to live?" and then they literally typed me a whole paragraph about how i matter and reasons to stay alive and i cried then went to sleep like they wanted me to and even though im still struggling with thoughts like that i always think of that conversation and it keeps me going

Merida TheNotBrave 3 years ago

Who am I to you? And my husband of almost ten years said: an obstacle.

Hey Pandas, What Question Did You Ask That Changed Your Life? (Closed)

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