What is the hardest thing you had to do as a new mom?

#1

sleep

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#2

Staying awake and ignoring well-meaning "advice".

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#3

adjusting with the new member

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Pablo Ramos
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or adjusting to the old "member" that wants action too soon?

#4

Finding the new rhythm and setting boundaries.

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#5

Keeping well meaning but troublesome new grandparents/relatives out.
Give mom some breathing room, and respect her wishes if she'd like to be alone for a while with her newborn. It's a big deal™ to have a baby, especially if it's her first.

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#6

Being able to do things for themselves or go out with friends at ALL.
They rarely get a chance to even do anything, but when they do, they can only be gone for an hour or two and are so tired and done that they can barely enjoy going out.

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StrangeOne
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom gave me 10 minutes. TEN MINUTES to get out the door, walk to blocks to a cafe to grab a coffee and be back in TEN MINUTES. I knew what she was trying to pull. I walked down one block then turned back. I get in the door and all she says "See? Did that feel better? Ten minutes is all you need." But other parents at a community group kept talking about going out to bars every weekend and they would just make the grandparents watch their kids. I wonder how that really went down? Probably not well.

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#7

If breastfeeding, being overwhelmed by "too much touch." I loved my baby and loved breastfeeding, but some days, I was done with all the skin to skin touching way earlier than he was done feeding.

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Val
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Breastfeeding didn't work for me. I had super low supply. I also didn't care for it. Maybe I'm weird.

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#8

Getting enough sleep and trying to function while sleep deprived, and trying to please everyone on top of that.

Taking care of herself. A mom will forget she is allowed to pamper herself, too.

Remember anything. Hormones are running havoc and there's so much focus on trying to remember to bring diapers, wipes, spare onsies and diaper shirts, bottles, snacks, keys, wallet, etc, etc, it is not actually uncommon that a mom may forget the baby in the moment, especially when rushing.

Avoiding Postpartum Depression. A new mother may not even realize she has PPD. It can come on gradually or quickly. It can last a short while, or years. People will generally see a PPD mother reserved, inactive, passing out suddenly, miserable, overly tired, sallow-faced, crying more often than normal, struggling to keep up with housework and but will otherwise have a healthy baby. However the baby may be colicky. What she does NOT need, that seems to be what people resort to first, is the "You're the mother!" lectures. New mothers who are struggling need social interactions, a real helping hand with chores, and SLEEP. Motherhood should not be such a burden of torturing yourself with sleep deprivation and such high stress and pressure you end up sliding down the stairs. (Happened to me.) Motherhood should not make you feel like you did something wrong by having a baby.
(Sorry, I went on a rant.)

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#9

Hold off the husband for a few more days? I speak as the husband...

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#10

Find time for themselves.

Your life changes after you become a mum. Everything suddenly revolves around your child and your own needs tend to get pushed aside.

It's important to try to make some time for yourself. It's not easy, but even 10 minutes can make a big difference.

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