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Hey Pandas, What Is Something You Really Enjoy, But Don’t Talk About Because Of The Stigma? (Closed)
Share your secret love for something that comes with the spice of stigma. What is it, and what is the stigma?
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#1
My faith...you mention Jesus and most people assume your judgmental and morally uptight.
Final score:
80points
#2
I am a total Star Trek nerd. But I don't talk about it much because everyone has a certain image of "Trekkies".
No, I do not own my own Starfleet uniform. I don't speak Klingon. I don't go to conventions or have action figures or anything like that. But everyone assumes that about you when you say you like Star Trek.
Now, I do I know an awful lot of trivia about it and I know all the plot lines, etc (but this is also true for several other TV series). And I have a coffee mug that has an eye chart on it in Klingon because i work for an eye doctor and my mom bought that for me as an ironic gift.
Final score:
70points
#3
being single, living with a bunny and not wanting kids
Final score:
63points
#4
my culture… i’m russian
no my culture is not starting wars and killing innocent people while riding bears and drinking vodka
Final score:
59points
#5
I love to watch cartoons. I always have. I am 64 years old and a retired teacher. My students used to crack up when I could discuss the latest Disney or Pixar films, or when I knew "Ren and Stimpy" and other Adult swim cartoons. I was either the cool teacher or the nutty one, either is fine with me.
Final score:
55points
#6
The fact I still like toys and sleep with stuffed toys at almost 26. I'm a bit imature and have depression, but playing with kid stuff conforts me, and I known people will either judge or mock me for it. Almost everytime I buy a toy, I feel judge by the cashiers on the stores.
Final score:
51points
#7
fanfiction/fanart. no, not every story is smut, or poorly written, or whatever. I've read some really well-written fanfic, and I've read some crappy "who let a five-year-old onto this website" fanfic. same goes with fanart. but hey, its all subjective. you do you boo.
Final score:
49points
#8
I really enjoy learning about random things. seems harmless right? but I think people find the things I lear about weird. I have learned about poisons (was learning about the cold war at the time), cults, with some urban legends and true crime mixed in. I don't always learn about dark stuff (heck, I researched butterflies for a while!) but I worry that sometimes people will think I'm crazy. nope. I just write stuff and Wikipedia is awesome
Final score:
49points
#9
LGBTQ+
It’s hard to bring it up into conversation because you never know what reactions will be like :( you could get “ ew do you like me or something”or “oh cool! I support:)”
Final score:
48points
#10
My pet chickens. Unless brought up normally (in person) I wouldn't talk about them, but if you get me started I could spill a lot of facts about them
Final score:
43points
#11
I love my snakes. They are fantastic pets but so many people are so negative about these wonderful creatures... Then they wilk talk about their dogs and kids for hours.
Final score:
41points
#12
I've been a huge fan of X-Men since about 1994. But now I'm a middle-aged married mother of 3 with a professional career. I would love to still collect/read comments, maybe even dress up for a comiccon, but my husband wouldn't understand and it would be frowned upon in most circles. Best I can hope for is to get my kids interested so we can share that passion, but they're a bit too young yet.
Final score:
40points
#13
My mental health and struggle with depression.
I always felt like I wasn't 'qualified' to be depressed because my life was pretty good. But your life being fine DOES NOT invalidate your feelings. Some people really do have trouble mentally, myself included, without having to be in an abusive home or toxic relationship or stuff like that.
Let's face it. A bad week can really f**k up your state of being. And that's normal. It doesn't mean it's ok. It just means that it will happen and you have to learn to overcome it.
I just want people to realize that someone struggling with a such a mindset needs and deserves help no matter the reason they feel that way. People have died over the smallest of things, bad days when someone just told them to suck it up or wait for things to get better. *Things do in fact get better*. But sometimes they just need to vent or cry or scream in the moment so their feelings are not bottled up until they all explode and something actually happens.
So yeah. I don't tell people when I'm actually not fine because all I get told is that "you shouldn't be depressed since your life is so nice." And not telling anyone anything is where it gets dangerous.
Just smile at someone if they are down. Let them yell their head off because they aren't having a good day. Let them process their emotions and help when you can. I cannot tell you how many times someone asking me if I'm ok and then listening to me has saved my life. A smile goes a long way.
Hang in there fellow pandas :)
Final score:
37points
#14
Anime.... I've been a fan since the early 70s when I first saw astroboy and kimba the white lion... It led to my passion for Japanese art, poetry and culture. (Even studied edo period printmaking at university.) But the fandom is so toxic, it's impossible to find intelligent discussion on the subject. The general view of anime seems to revolve around 4 or 5 mainstream shonen series, and it fkn drives me crazy. It's not all over the top violence and giant breasted women. There are so many quiet, beautiful, heartfelt series out there but they just get lost in the miasma of toxicity. I just don't bother trying to talk to anyone about it because the stigma is just too great. It's seen as the realm of incel fuckwits and whining manbabies....
Final score:
35points
#15
My friend is an undertaker, he loves his job, gets to support lots of families in need, learns a lot about different cultures. But we lie about his job in social situations because people get either 1) uncomfortable or 2) start asking really intense personal questions.
Final score:
35points
#16
Using neopronouns.
I use quite a bit of neos because traditional pronouns sometimes don’t sound right.but every time I am open about multiple people make fun of me and tell I’m trying to be special.
Final score:
32points
* ~ l a s a n y a ~ * 2 years ago
i hate homophobes. would this be homophobia? i may be misclassifying it don't downvote me.
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BookDragon 2 years ago
As someone a cis girl who's friends with lots of non-binary, agender, and trans people, as well as a few people with DID, I'm confused on why people find them silly. Sure, I have to make sure I'm using the right pronouns, but honestly I just use she/her in my head and swap it out with the neopronoun. She has her book=Xe have Xer book (hope I did that right, I'm still not great at using neopronouns, but I'm also bad at talking to people, so I promise I'm not trying to be offencive)
Horst 2 years ago (edited)
The problem is not the neopronouns. The problem are the people who make ones like frog/frogself. Edit: I have no problem with people who use neopronouns because the regular ones don’t feel right sometimes.
Shyla Bouche 2 years ago
These make more sense than most, at least to me.
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BeepBeepBoopBoop 2 years ago
hey I would love to know and learn more about neopronouns! Especially yours, since yk, they're yours hah
Commit_Fire (it/ they/he) (Submission author) 2 years ago
Oki!! So some of my pronouns are things suck as cloud/cloudself or I use emoji pronouns such as 🍄/🍄self!! In a sentence online with emoji pronouns would go something like this: “🍄 went to the mall with 🍄’s friends 🍄 had a great time!” Some people use these types of pronouns cause their gender feels connected to things such as mushrooms or other things! Some people’s gender may also feel connected to a character, while yes anyone can use neopronoun and xenogenders morally people who are neurodivergent use them!! I hoped this helps!!
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Saturn Rings 2 years ago (edited)
I actually realized yesterday that there was a zenogender that I really liked, Even before that it supported neopronouns and zenogenders though, valid! They/Them/Themself star/star/stars/stars/starself nov/nova/novas/novas/novaself com/comet/comets/comets/cometself wi/wish/wishes/wishes/wishself
the shrimp whisperer 2 years ago (edited)
snowflake jokes are the worst. the people telling them don't know and don't care about the damage that they're doing to not just gender diverse people, but also the way we think about people who are different in general.
#17
I enjoy doing math. I am in a second year calculus class, and I’ve always enjoyed my math hw. When I tell people that they look at me like I’m crazy, or say something about how I only like it because I’m some kind of genius, which I’m DEFINITELY not. I don’t enjoy othering myself, so I mostly just enjoy my math work quietly.
Final score:
31points
#19
Being Vegan - I don’t push it or shame anyone, I wasn’t always vegan. However I am passionate about it and always happy to debate or just discuss it
Final score:
29points
#20
Billie Eilish.
I like her music a lot, but I'm not your stereotypical Billie Eilish fan (I'm kind of a nerd) so I don't really talk about it.
Final score:
29points
#22
Bored panda and some other social media sites. I don't usually post, but I love reading other people's stories and opinions on issues. I would definitely get judged for how much time I lurk on these sites.
Final score:
27points
#23
I love watching true crime shows. People ask me if I am studying up on how to get away with murder....my response is always the same..."would you like to be the test subject?"
Final score:
26points
#25
Furry artwork in all forms (books, pictures, comics and animations) and the liking of Anthropomorphism as concept.
Furries don't have the best reputation, mainly because of the impression some few wierd people from the fandom leave on the internet. Other prejudices are that all Furries are zoophiles, LGBQT+ or neckbeards living in basements. I wouldn't say that there isn't some of that present in the fandom, but the majority of Furries are just normal everyday people. (LGBQT+ is a somewhat correct "stigma" though, a very present topic in the community)
Final score:
22points
#26
Minecraft YouTube. There are so many great SMPs and people playing on them. I love the building tutorials of some, the lore on others, the challenges and friends making super cool things together. Sometimes crazy new developments happen and I have no one to discuss it with.
Hermitcraft x Empires crossover anyone?
Final score:
22points
#27
I'm a trans masc, nonbinary, asexual, pan and poly person. I hate talking about it because "it's a sin" and "you're going to hell" and all that. I'd love support.
Final score:
22points
#28
Hobbies. I do a lot of cross stitch embroidery and needle felting (mostly needle felted 3D animals). I do it purely for relaxation, and because I enjoy it, and mostly give a lot of the finished pieces away, or to a friend who runs an animal rescue centre, and she sells them or auctions them to raise funds. But every time I mention it to people, the reaction is always "you should do craft shows/sell them on Etsy/open an online shop/make a living out of it" I don't want to do it as a business, I do it purely for the relaxation and satisfaction it gives me. If I monetise it, I'm sure that sense of enjoyment would go and I don't want that.
Final score:
22points
#29
Does head scratches count? Could happily sit there for hours with someone just scratching my head
Final score:
21points
#30
I'm not sure if this counts. I no longer give a s**t, but when I was 13, I LOVED N'sync. Unfortunately I already picked punk outcast as my personal. So I 'hated boy bands'. Even wore a shirt that said 'N' SUCK'. I'm 36, and I just want to say 'bye bye bye' is f**king catchy and blast it proudly in my car.
Final score:
21points
#31
I really enjoyed the Twilight books and movies. I thought Kristen Stewart did a great job. I'm a happily married, middle-aged woman.
Final score:
20points
#32
ASMR. I know it looks weird (and there is some . . . out-there content, I admit). It looked weird to me too when I first heard about it. But if you find a type that you respond to, its just so dam relaxing.
Final score:
20points
#33
Wanting to get rid of my uterus because its very existence inside me is a constant source of anxiety. We do not talk enough about the fact that the experience of having a uterus is legitimately full-on traumatic for a huge fraction of the female population, even in the unlikely even that they are never assaulted or harrassed (yes, the majority of women are eventually subjected to these things). Periods are horrifying, humiliating, and excruciating, especially early on - something like 70% of teenage girls have periods that are painful enough to be debilitating at least some of the time. When I was in high school I'd go home one day a month almost every month with chills, diarrhea, and cramps so bad I couldn't stand up straight...only for my parents to tell me "you can't keep doing this" (I knew better than anyone that it wasn't sustainable, but WTF could I do in my own, knowing OTC pain meds only worked if I could take them before the pain started?) It sounds absurd and hilarious to say, but I've ejected blood and chunks in such quantity with such force that queefs have given me flashbacks. The hormones screwed with my body so much that I only had 7-10 days a month where my GI tract functioned like everyone says it was supposed to, and 2 weeks out of the month I couldn't run without inducing cramps that made me feel like I had to give birth to my spine. And most of all, I'm terrified of being pregnant, not just because every mother on my mom's side has had postpartum mental issues and pelvic organ prolapse, but because politically, with the US trending toward the elimination of all forms of female reproductive autonomy, it's turning into a Sword of Damocles situation. Even now that ice stopped my periods with birth control, it feels like I have a loaded trap in me, just waiting for my access to run out to shackle me with dependence and disability, and force me into reproductive enslavement to the white supremacist cause. And I'm a lucky one for being able to find birth control that works for me. For all the men out there about to say "but what about the multiple orgasms" (because you'd be shocked how often that pops up in threads where women are venting about how much our reproductive systems suck): as someone who can give myself those on a routine basis, I can confirm, they are absolutely not worth the everything else that comes with having a uterus. I'd give them up in a heartbeat. I'd give up *all* orgasms *forever* if I could get rid of my uterus without worrying about the rest of my organs falling because of it. That's how much it sucks.
Final score:
20points
#34
Being a Norse Pagan. I immediately get seen as racist and intolerant. We aren't that, I promise
Final score:
19points
#35
McDonalds. I love it but I don't tell anyone that.
Final score:
17points
#36
A few things. Fanfictions as someone else mentioned, they're not all bad/"cringe" and the bad ones can be really funny and enjoyable /gen. The DSMP, they seem like such lovely people and they're really talented. I also like the furry community, they're really wholesome the vast majority of the time. Neopronouns and xenogender identities. Man I'm not trying to "erase" or "make fun of" trans people, I'm just trying to explain my gd identity, please leave me alone 😭. Algebra and coding. They're fun to me. Oh, and lastly, kids tv. I like watching stuff like paw patrol and my little pony and octonauts and teen titans go. Yeah, I know they're made for kids and I'm "too old" but it's just a nice thing to have on in the background if nothing else
Final score:
16points
#37
I know I'll be judged by this, but I LOVE bounty bars :)
Final score:
16points
#38
Cats. It's something that I am obsessed with ever since I was a toddler. I grew up with cats. They've been there for me for almost everything I've been through, from the death of my grandparents, to my parent's divorce, and even through my depression. They've been there for me for years and I can't thank them enough.
People are always so judgemental against them and think that they're not smart, but it's quite the opposite. Cats are plenty smart. Smarter than dogs. It's been scientifically proven.
Final score:
16points
#39
I really hate when I tell people that I do crochet and they think it is a grandma thing. No, i just enjoy creating things.
Final score:
15points
#40
This one has already been mentioned, but mine is a different take on it: LGBTQIA+. I have huge issues with it because I just recently dedicated my life to Christ, and yes, the bible does say that it's sin. But ... it doesn't sit right with me that just because you chose to be with who you loved means you're kept out of heaven.
Also, however, our government. I'm American, and yeah, our government sucks. But I'm not talking about the people, though I have strong opinions there. I'm talking about the system.
it SUCKS.
Final score:
14points
#41
Less so of a problem since 2016, but being a huge Guns N' Roses fan. Sort of silly, I know, but in the early 2000s, it felt awkward to admit to most people. I know they are just regular humans in a rock band, but my heart beats a little faster when I see that logo or hear a few notes. The reunion has changed my life in that I've started travelling the world to meet up with fans and I've met some fantastic and wonderful people from that.
Final score:
13points
#42
Minecraft. Everyone thinks it's some "cringey YouTuber game", but really it's a fun creative space where possibilities are practically endless! It was a big part of my childhood and still is a great stress reliever for me today!
Final score:
13points
#43
I'm retired and I spend most of my day on my computer playing the game World of Warcraft. I love not having to work and playing WOW not only passes the time but it beats housework.
Final score:
12points
#44
Dungeons & Dragons. I only just recently got into it and I want to start a campaign with my friends, but none of them play and think it's too complicated or too nerdy. I'm not even that nerdy of a person, I just like playing it because I can battle monsters and be someone else for a few hours at a time.
Final score:
12points
#45
Playing World of warcraft. And no, it is not like as it is shown in that famous South Park episode.
Final score:
11points
#46
Aside from my group of friends, some co-workers (and certain customers by proxy), and family, I don't really talk about video games too often.
I think its a pair of stigmas that are tied to it as to why I don't talk about them. First, gamers are usually perceived as nerdy by the media (which I am, don't get me wrong), which is the lesser of the two in my opinion. And the other is because of all the scandals with certain games (like the Columbine Shooting, or Jack Thompson trying to tie video games to these horrific events, and even blackmail certain developers).
Probably a lesser stigma, but if I do talk about games, most random people often assume I play the more popular franchise right now, like GTA, COD, Assassin's Creed, or other things like that. I usually don't have too many discussions with new people (unless I go to a specific thread for said game) when I talk about a new RPG/JRPG, or action game.
Final score:
11points
#47
Having a chronic illness. I have endometriosis and it doesn't show unless I'm so inflamed I look pregnant. It hurts like hell some days so I was put on a opiate + nerve blocker cocktail... People either assume I'm a junkie, that I'm faking or feel sorry for me and treat me differently...
Yes, it hurt, yes I lost my tubes, yes my husband and I can't conceive naturally, and yes it bloody sucks but that's our family's business.
I don't want to be given diet advice, told to do yoga or know about the wide of your coworker who also has endo to be honest...
Let me fight my fight, enjoy my good days and if I let you in to see the bad days, don't ask too many questions, just go with it and be there... trust me that's enough.
Final score:
11points
#48
Anime/manga because there is a surprising amount of stigma around boys liking anime/manga (even though Pokemon is a manga/anime)
Final score:
10points
#49
Smoking... I know, I know... It's disgusting and I wish I didn't smoke... But when I light up, I do 'enjoy it'
Final score:
10points
#50
The DSMP. People who don't know it think that it's stupid and nerdy, and people who do know it often criticize who you choose to watch. I love watching Karl, Tubbo, Wilbur, Tommy, Ranboo, and Techno [fly high and never die ❤]. They honestly help me to feel emotion when I have a hard time doing so due to mental health.
Final score:
9points
#51
Witchcraft and vodun.
Writing fanfic.
Kink in general.
I'm a bit of a foodie/food snob but...I love carb loading on buttered noodles. Which, now that I've thought of it I'm gonna go do it.
Tropey lesbian romances (even the non steamy ones)
Having a messy bedroom. Like actually I don't like it being tidy. Everything else can be tidy, idc, but my room needs have zones filled with my favorite stuff sitting out where I can see and access it easily. My bed is basically a bare mattress with a giant next of blankets and pillows all in the "wrong" order. Soft comforter goes on the bottom with me and everything else on top, the I pull it over me like I'm a giant pillow and sheet burrito.
Final score:
9points
#52
I'm a 19 year old boy, but I like ladies older than me; 25-30
Final score:
9points
#53
Enjoying child books/ teen dramas (I'm 36).
'The Infinite Story' ist still one of my favourite books, also some things by Astrid Lindgren.
And for teen dramas, puberty is such a intense time where so much happens that you can make a great story of.
Off course there are some bad series in this genre, too but but there are loooots of great series.
Gets my interest more than the 183627171 horror series in Netflix, sorry.
Also enjoying 'esoteric' stuff. Im interested in different light effects and atmospheres, I like dreams and zodiac signs, I used to be interested in semiprecious stones and I love incence sticks.
Not something I can tell a lot of people bc it gives the image of 50year old people in their caftans with crystal balls and no touch with reality.
B******t.
Final score:
9points
#55
Nickel back… yeah, I said it
Final score:
9points
#56
I love peace. Quiet times when my head doesn't hurt and no one is coming to me with yet another problem to solve. When I don't have to worry about who the next amoral president will be, (regardless of party) don't have to wish people would be less judgemental about their differences. (If someone is gay or straight, black or white, old or young, etc., why the hell do you care or judge? It doesn't impact you! Mind your business. Live and let live)! I just love when I find that harmonious place where the sun is shining or the rain is pounding or the winds are howling and there's no other person polluting my brain pan. No extra sensory b.s. from someone else's perspective. Only the peace you can find by focusing on whatever diety you believe in or inner strength you can grasp and enjoying the moment, no matter how fleeting it may be. That my fellow humans, is golden.
Final score:
8points
#57
Wrestling. WWE; AEW; NJPW; ROH; indie shows. Love them all. As a women in her 40’s it’s hard to find other women interested in it to the extent I am. I just love it. It’s like a bad soap opera with fighting. Thank god my husband is so into it too otherwise I would have no one to talk to about it.
Final score:
8points
#58
I love to research poisons & venoms - including history, creation, useage, reactions.
Only my (very small & tight) social circle knows about it. Every other person - colleagues & bio-family - just know the crafty, punk that somehow knows nearly everything about everyone.
What no one knows -- I made a few different ones and stored them away (out of reach for anyone but me)
It's fascinating --- no, I never poisoned anyone (exception: the spiked punch at prom 2004) & I don't plan on doing so 😅
Final score:
7points
#59
I feel like I'm gonna get judged here too but here I go-
You know those videos in YouTube where you have little characters creating skits and stuff like that? Gacha videos? I'm a (very) small content creator for the Gacha community. Such a shame that everyone who makes these videos gets judged just because of a few bad or cringy people.
Final score:
6points
#60
The book Ender’s Game written by Orson Scott Card. I loved, loved, loved his books I read growing up (I was 10). They were a lifeline to a lonely introvert kid. There were some valuable lessons about compassion and critical thinking and many others, all told wonderfully in stories. But later on in life, I learned he was a homophobe, a radical Mormon (which ties him to religious, fundamentalist views), an extremist (is an active racist propagandist) and is a racist bigot.
Philosophically, I cringe to remember I consumed the work of a “bad artist” but I also cringe at the thought of my lonely 11-year-old self continuing to be lonely having never read the novels. Sigh.
Final score:
6points
#61
I draw and write very violent things. My characters always have some terrible thing happen to them to start their storyline. One character just recently had his wife and two children killed in an incredibly gorey fashion because I, the dictator, needed to start him on a new pathway. Everything I draw is worse, because this stuff you can see. I'm not allowed to talk about it to other people in greater detail, so that should give you an idea of the level we're going for here. I enjoy it, but other people think I'm insane. Truth is, I was a kid with violent thoughts and terrible anger issues, and I let those out on others. Now I'm older, and the violent thoughts still persist. I'm still easily angered, and my anger often leads to violence. But I've learned, and now the only people affected by my own mental state are not real, at least not to anybody like me. Its therapy, but most people don't understand that. Not everyone who draws gore does it because their a maniac.
Final score:
6points
#62
Being alone, or not being social. Oftentimes people consider me to be rude or arrogant due to this. But that's not true. I love to be on my own.
Final score:
5points
#65
Thai BL series. As in boy's love. I absolutely love watching them but never talk about them to anybody. These series are actually really good, great stories and great actors. It's like a guilty pleasure of mine.
Final score:
4points
#66
Urban Exploring. AKA going into abandoned buildings, drainage tunnels, etcetera, and photographing the places. While I consider it preserving history, very few people understand why I do this. That and it's a pretty dangerous hobby and I don't always have the owner's permission.
If I'm honest, though, for me it's like a slow motion extreme sport.
Final score:
2points
#70
I'm straight. If I ever mention being straight apparently all of a sudden I'm homophobic-
Final score:
1point
What do you think ?
Danish Susanne 2 years ago (edited)
I am old enough to being childish without shame. I really think, that it is wrong to stop doing what you enjoy (so long as you do not hurt anyone), because there are some people out there who frowns upon it. And some times, I am sure that they are just envious.
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
It really shocked me when Travis Barker traded in his drums for a set of bongos.
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Dutchman Callypso 2 years ago
Do people not understand the question that was asked? Most of the stuff on this list is either something that is not stigmatized at all (McDonald's... the fact it's unhealthy isn't a stigma) or things you don't enjoy (h0m0ph0bia, chronic illnesses...).
Stardust she/her 1 year ago
Fanfiction and shipping. Some of the fanfics are weird af but the rest of them are written well. Not every fanfic involving shipping is smut (I don’t really mind reading it though) and some of them are nice and wholesome. There’s also the stigma of being childish. I’m a bit short for my age and my voice sounds like a 9 year old’s and my inner child constantly finds a way to burst out and show herself. I watch a lot of animated shows which most people feel that only kids watch but the thing is that those shows are more entertaining to me than most other shows
Danish Susanne 2 years ago (edited)
I am old enough to being childish without shame. I really think, that it is wrong to stop doing what you enjoy (so long as you do not hurt anyone), because there are some people out there who frowns upon it. And some times, I am sure that they are just envious.
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
It really shocked me when Travis Barker traded in his drums for a set of bongos.
Load More Replies... Dutchman Callypso 2 years ago
Do people not understand the question that was asked? Most of the stuff on this list is either something that is not stigmatized at all (McDonald's... the fact it's unhealthy isn't a stigma) or things you don't enjoy (h0m0ph0bia, chronic illnesses...).
Stardust she/her 1 year ago
Fanfiction and shipping. Some of the fanfics are weird af but the rest of them are written well. Not every fanfic involving shipping is smut (I don’t really mind reading it though) and some of them are nice and wholesome. There’s also the stigma of being childish. I’m a bit short for my age and my voice sounds like a 9 year old’s and my inner child constantly finds a way to burst out and show herself. I watch a lot of animated shows which most people feel that only kids watch but the thing is that those shows are more entertaining to me than most other shows
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